WHAT I REALLY MEANT TO SAY

What I really Meant to say

Shelley
Jo
Melis
Brad
Amy
Ray
Lisa
Kathy
Jon
Kristin
Alicia
Andy
Shannon
Hotmail.com

Archive
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Archive 2
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Archive 4
Archive 5
Archive 6
Archive 7
Archive 8
Archive 9
Back to me

a whole lot of people have checked out my site and i was up to almost 2000! but then of course, it failed, so now i got a new counter! whooooooooo hooooooooooooo - now sign my guestbook!

Baptize frenzy
Saturday, January 18, 2003

WOW! I am so tired right now, im so drained, but cant stop smiling, im sure uve all read shells pita, so u know the info, but omgoodness, tonight is a night i will never in my life forget, all dams were broken and the tears wouldnt stop flowin(at least i wasnt the only one for a change!:D) Ive never experianced anything quite like it, couldnt stop shakin, wow..... so ya that was my night! Im sorry for those who couldnt be there, i wish u all were, so u could have felt the spirit that was ever-so-present.... i cant wait to see everyone, i need to give out hugs, so many hugs.... k im so tired, i cant type worth anything, so ya, im gonna go, but yay for all who were there and it was amazing sharing this eve w/ u all! IM SO HAPPY, FEELIN SNAPPY! (good song btw - no its not me just randomly attempting poetry!) alrighty! later days

STRESS
Wednesday, January 15, 2003

Omg, it cant be true! But it is, i see the finished product in my hands! YAYAYAYAYAYAY! Alright, so ive been wound a little tight lately and im afraid the week isnt over yet, but at least i can sit at the sidelines and take a little breather! Its about time too! Its been craziness! Im an emotional wreck, take the breakdown in the hallway this morning...that was real fun! HA! so ya, life is in official upheavel, wonder when it will ever settle down.... oh, wait thats right, WE'RE IN HIGH SCHOOL, IT DOESNT SETTLE DOWN! Deep breathes..... 1..2..3.. k, so ya, anywho, not too much new with me anyways... im really tired tho, so i think ill finish up, maybe head out early! later days!

What's your sexual appeal?
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blah
Saturday, January 11, 2003

oy, well its been quite the week, btw, whats up w/ the font is it just mine thats huge? monday was blah, i did not want to go to school but i did, the week was kinda run together...dont remember much.. Shell, Jo and Melis all bought me a teen study bible ("happy no reason day") and i almost cried, tims surprise night waas interesting (hehe) i like cranium! One of the nights i discovered i couldnt swallow anything w/out cringing, still not up to par but that will come in a moment... Made cookies on thurs w/ Shell, and fri was the dance... i was supposed to be brittany spears (HA) so ya, we all gathered at my house and prepared ourselves... cleanup was fun, i got to use the big broom, hehe... when i was dancing w/ brad i stepped in a big puddle of water it was gross... after the dance we went to pitaville and hung around while they closed early cause the bars got closed down... James ended up drivin around w/ us for a while.. ya... today was the real joe, got up and made some cookies and iced the ones me and shell made on thurs... then i had to get fabric for my dress...(holy geez, fabric costs alot!)so ya i as late but still the first of our immediate friends... i got set up but the whole time i was wishing for my bed... massive ear aches... sore throat... stiff body... not a smart idea to be around food! i ended up getting 'sent ' home b/c i fell asleep in the chair and was awakened by chris who ran into me (not knowing i was ill) andthen almost falling out of the chair... btw, sorry for leaving! i feel horrible for making u be responsible for my job! ... i came home and got some more drugs... passed out, my dad was messin w/ my head (too easily done when one just wakes from sleep, esp drugged sleep!) so anywho, i should be sleepin now, but im in pain again, waiting for drug time, almost here! yay, anywho i better go! later days

Who needs veggies?
Saturday, January 4, 2003

ello ello! well, my cuz went home today! boooooo, but shes feelin a whole lot better then b4 (she came down w/ the flu or something it was not fun) yesterday we went stalking and she got to see Sir Hot, she was like hes cute, not hot, cute! i was like CHA! LOL we decided he was both! Anywho, we also went to the movies to see Maid in Manhatten, it was terific! I creid, but whos surprised? not i! And at bowling we had highlighters on us taht showed up cool like, it was fun! almost got thru 3 games! The guys in the lane beside us were pretty hot too! it was great! In the parking lot of the theatre shell was brushin off the van and was lke, theres a hot guy on the snow mountain over there, so i looked, but all i saw was some guy takin a wizz.. it was scary, i started to scream EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, and shell was like THATS NOT HIM!!! It was too funny... today was a girls night out, (altho we ended up at my house watchin Jeebus) mmmm, so much junk food! its good for u really! who needs veggies? PAH! I think grant must!It kinda looks like a hound,....kinda ;)so ya, theres not too much more! One should really work on theyre school crap eh? NAH! the everlasting conflict......... later days!

Oh Really?
Tuesday, December 31, 2002

What Kind of Virgin Are You?
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whoda thunk eh? booo, i dont tlike the advice they gave, i like the way i am!

What Element Are You?
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What kind of fairy are you?
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A different quiz, what strange type of person are you?
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Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Sob
Tuesday, December 31, 2002

heyhey, im cofuzzled! oy! being confuzzled blows! boooooooooooo, i dunno whats going with me, arg.... well, happy new years eve! i cant beleive its starting over again! already this school year is zooming by, soon we're all gonna be graduated and off to our own new lives.... i gotta stop thinkin bout this tho, i always end up crying! Speaking of, last night my cuz and i watched A Walk to Remember and oh yes, we needed a box of klenex.. didnt end up goin to bed till 3! it was fun! boooo, melis woke me up! Ah well, i still love u! heck i can forgive shell for ...ya.... lol! ok, so im gonna go now! Happy New Year! later days!

amy is coming!
Sunday, December 29, 2002

0k so i know why the blobs were gone, they couldnt pay for them, crappy deal eh? ah well! yay today is our christmas dinner weeeeeeee then Amy is comin home with us!alrighty, i better scram! later days!

my bread hurts
Saturday, December 28, 2002

Tonight, shelley did the unthinkable! but first i'll tell yall (hehe) bout my day, i went bowling w/ lisa and her cuz and the fisrt game sucked real bad, but then out of nowhere in the 2 game i got a turkey and was beating my first game by the 4th frame! i ended up w/ a 199! go me! then we went to the mall, it was not very productive, but we got milkshakes, mmmmmmmm. okok, now for after...... me, shell, jo and rita all got together and walked to pitaville, and shell gave him my phone number!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! i could not beleive it! i was like, can i die now? anywho, we ate there and ended up back at shells where we ate soooooo much sugar and i ended up wearing a cowboy hat pretending to be australian but really sounding like goofy! here are some things that will make ppl laugh (mostly only those who were there, others will recall im just plain crazy) : my bread hurts, the hamburglar, burgaled my ham!i pulled a homer, elephant love meledy, shes afraid of crocidiles, phon nuber?!?!?! yesssss, sugar....almost snort.... ya, i cant think of too much more, after jo and rita left we ate popcorn and talked for a while.... it was goodly! anywho, my head REALLY hurts from my little incident, and i gotta bake this pizza cassarole thinger tomorrow! so later days!

boxing day
Thursday, December 26, 2002

today was fun! i got to go shopping! Jo was there and Brad was there and then we met up w/ Chris..... i got to try on a whole bunch of clothes! i even bought a shirt! My grandma didnt come over tonight, but by the time i got home my uncle howie and aunt rose were already here.... i think i ate too much again! booooooo! ah well, i got to show off my pics (from europe) it was fun..... yay,id like to welcome amie to the internet world! she got a computer for christmas! yay amie! alright, so i still dunno whats goin on for new years, but whatever happens will be fun! yay! alright, i dont feel so hot, im gonna finish now! later days!

sunrise
Thursday, December 26, 2002

oy! well today was christmas, but very sadly it felt like any other day! i know in my heart it wasnt, this was the birthday of my dear savior! how could it be average? its not! we did everything like normal christmases (except our gift, wasnt opened until after noon) am i being selfish cause m upset over how weird this year was casue we only got about one gift each? how can i be, when the lord handed over the best gift anyone could ever ever ever ever give! oh, forgive me for being so, so, ME! maybe it will feel more normal on sat and sun when i have my big family dinners.... but today was very family orientated, we even sat around the table and played marbles! i dunno.... what is wrong with me? perhaps its just too late... we'll see i suppose... w/ the sun rise, may also my spirits

He thought i was HOT!
Sunday, December 22, 2002

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, last night was fun, it was the real joe coffee house and i think it went alright (btn the ppl always behind my counter and our 'monstrosity nativity scene')plus there was a very cute band member there, hehehe.....so ya, i would have to say that the highlight of my evening came after the real joe...... a small visit to pitaville kept a large small plastered on my face for the remander of the evening! hehe, he IS hot! yay! i was so hyper it was hilarious, half way thru the visit i realized i had icing sugar down the front of my coat! it was funny! i was shakin thru the whole thing and was like "a guy should not be able to do this to me!" weeeeee, im talkin to him right now! its fun! Oh, last night while i was really hyoer i was sitting in shells car outside my house and i was telling her a story, (in hyper speed)and i was fidling w/ a handle at the side of the seat and in the midst of one of my words, i pulled the lever a bt to har and the seat went flying towards my face, it actually got so close i felt the hairs on my face move! It was sooooooooooooo funny, five minutes late(when mw and shell had finally stopped laughing) i picked up where i had left off! It was classic! anywho i think ive had enough for now! Its too hard to concentrate on this while im talking to him! later days!

rain
Thursday, December 19, 2002

its raining its pouring........ well, talk about being topsy-turvy! i was talkin to shell yesterday about how weird my emotions have been of late... and we all know im just normally an overly emotional person, so when it gets worse, its just pathetic! even today, there have been times i want to sit down and cry a river, but others im so happy im overflowing and want everyone to be as happy as me.... i watched survivor and brian won, i didnt want clay to win so i guess its ok... ya, im afraid.... my sister was over and she had looked at my christmas list and it said lotto tickets, and she decided to walk up to me piont it out and say "you know, gambling is against what your precious bible says" why must she mock me? y cant she take me seriously for anything? have i not shown her anything? is this a test? charlie wont eat again, and hes so skinny... y am i like this? b/c god wants it that way right? i know everything happens for a purpose, i whole heartedly live by that, its like my motto, i just wish so much that we knew the reasons so things wouldnt hurt as much (but maybe that would defeat the purpose so i dunno) just leave it in Gods hands right? Dah, SHE was concerned for me? nice.... i dunno anymore..... i wanna be happy .... but what if i get rejected, slam, door in my face, butt on the floor, bloody nose... then theres a lesson to be learned? dont ever put ur heart on the line? its too late to reel it back in, but in truth do i really want to? i dunno!!! breathe* count to ten, see the rainbow and remember that God is in charge and he knows what hes doing..... later days

lunch!!
Wednesday, December 18, 2002

hey hey! today rocked! (well except for the whole insides trying to get out thing!) yay, i went to pitaville for lunch and he made my pita! hehehehe, it was yummy too! yay! Then i was soooo hyper all day cause i was like "he touched my hand!" hehe, im so pathetic! ah well! i got his addy today too, then i added him and we talked and i was soooo hyperventalating, and shell was like "breathe" hehehe! yay! im soooooo happy, go me! during my spares today i had to work on yrbk, and i was goin crazy! yikes! i helped go shopping for OGT, it was fun, every time Tim mentioned pads, hed say "feminine products" but whisper it funnily! it was classic!hehehe! alright, well were supposed to go bowling tonight... so i should go! i get to pick up my moula tonight too! yay, amybe i can go shoppn! whooo hoooooooo! alrighty! later days!

Thoughts:
Weeeeeeeeeeeee, Cool beans, Whoooo hoooooo, eeeeeeeeep, yup yup, oy!, meh, sweet chicken! alrighty, mmmm hmmmmmm, classic!

Bible Verses:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13:4

Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also Matthew 6:21

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:34

Quotes I like:

Never think that God's delays are God's denials. Hold on; hold fast; hold out. Patience is genius

We have not come into the world to be a number; we have been created for a purpose, for great things: to love and be loved

Those who die with the most toys, still dies

After the verb 'to Love,' 'to Help' is the most beautiful verb in the world

Imagination was given to us to compensate for what we are not; a sense of humor was given to us to console us for what we are.

Peace is more than the absence of war