march 06 2001
np: Enya -- Lothlorien
Happyeth Harieth Rayaeth toeth Fadheth and hiseth
darlingth sistaeth. Eth, eth, eth. I loveth publiceth holidayeth, bweeeth.
Liiliiii-taaachiii, doko da? >< I want to go
bowling again--! XO And Amy-oneeesaaaamaaa!!! Kimi mo
doko doko ni iru no? T__T I miss you----!!! (same goes for Jiiiiiin, except that at least I *know* *she's*
alive...^^;)
Bunch of Jap high school students from Miyazaki
visited our school yesterday, and I got to lead one group. *_* Ah, had fun. The guys were
gorgeously cute, although there were obviously some serious communication problems at
times. ^^;;;; On the whole, I am proud of the fact that they *could* understand me, even
if *I* couldn't understand half of what they were trying to say (was too distracted by the
guys' seksay huskay voices using all those informal forms XDDD) and that the girls thought
my accent was nice. "You Japanese is the sound good! Yeah!" XDv;; Mwee. I got a
bunch of presents from those lovely pople too. *stares at toy wakizashi with big silly
smile* And I even got e-adds and snail adds, most treasured of which comes from the
adorable young male with spiky hair who shoved it into my hands with a bow and a request
for my own add. *melts happily* I might be in luuuuuv, oh yeeees. XD XD Life! Is! Good!
(for now, at least XP)
I haven't studied for the Bio and History CAs
tomorrow yet. *shrugs* Story of my life - always study for tests the day before one takes
them. The sheer terror and sense of urgency suddenly developed works wonders in the
process of information-absorbing. *snarks and buffs nails*
Meg-oneesama, I heart the Thumbelina Clovers much.
*cackles* And whaddya know, I finished the buttered toffee in the house yesterday. ^__^
march 04 2001
np: UC Men's Octet -- California Drinking Song
*points to above link with shaking finger*
o/= "Dooon't you know you goottaa gooo BEEEAAARRRRSS---!!" o/= *HOWLS*
Sakki-neechan, I really love you. XD XD XD XD
*glomps Mika-chan and Erin-neechama* Thanks for the fun. ^_^ Charlene honey, I dig the new layout BIG time. ^____- Thanks for the honour! XD And everyone say hi to my newly acquired Thea-neesama, who has been traumatising me with Yami fic bunnies of late. *poke* XD I feel LOTS better, yes indeedy do.
Oh, Meg-oneesama, I didn't. >_> I would have liked to, though.
march 03 2001
np: Yaida Hitomi -- Nee
今朝、あたし、本当に「親父」がきらいだぁーー！いつも同じそうなのに。＞＿＜；出かけたいぃぃ。でも病気なので、家で宿題をしなくちゃ。＊しくぅ＊ あたしの人生、苦しいなあぁ。Ｔ＿Ｔ
まあね。宿題した後でフィックを書くつりだ。ＸＤｖヘッー。
Just testing out my newly-installed Global IME, which is not the best of such progs I've encountered, but you get my point if you can read it. *shrugs* ^^;
march 02 2001
np: Helloween -- If I Could Fly
Wonder of wonders - a new layout for this pita. The
fact that I'm on hiatus from school *wild cheering* for two days might have something to
do with it. *snarks* I'm so sorry if this looks pissy in 800x600, for I have a new, purty
big monitor now and it looks good best in 1024x768. *_* eyeeee. I tried testing this in
800x600, but it still looked weirdish, so...apologies. >.> Ne ne, isn't the picture
of Satoshi holding Daisuke lovely? *beams* That's done by my ever-sparkly wunnerful Sakki-neechan, and a mere example of the *other*
beautiful art she has stashed away in her blog's temp folder and site. XD XD Oneechama, hope I'm forgiven for using the
pic without express permission? And for ruining it. o0;;; I did try, honest. I haven't
touched a graphics program in months, just so you know. >.>;
Tin-onee,
*HUG* I love the beautiful layout at Niaiserie.
It really, really made me happy. Thank you so much. *deathglomps* And Meg-oneesama, thank
you also for the recipe. ^__^ *gloomp* Ditto to Sakki-neechan for mailing me.
I just don't handle stress well. I know that. I'm
still learning, hang it all. I really *am* sick; I had on-off flash migraines the past few
days and flu yesterday. I couldn't even walk straight this morning - Oniichan had to help
me to the doctor's door so I wouldn't kiss the carpet halfway. >< And still, STILL
Oyaji was pissed. Because I didn't go to school. Because I missed a freaking common test
today.
...
*bitterly* I really don't have anything to say.
Rationality demands I be calm because he's only worried that I won't be able to catch up
with schoolwork and lessons, that he's stressed himself and doesn't think before he
speaks, but it's bloody hard. I wish he'd realise I have feelings too, that MAMA has
feelings too, even though we're female. Yes, *because* we're female, shit him. >__<
He can't talk to me about equality of the sexes and that I should be taking all the
*hardships* that boys can take when he still thinks that I don't know a fucking thing
about life because I'm a fucking girl. I happen to have my head *quite* firmly attached,
damn it all. I know I'm sentimental and dreamy, but I can be practical when I need to. He
just doesn't WANT to see that. And if I keep hearing about "the HELL?! You're in the
bloody weaker stream and you're still bloody stressed? Don't give me that rubbish!" I
will run away. I swear. >__< Forget maturity. He doesn't even want to see me as
anything but a kid anyway. Well I'm SORRY, but I'm stressed because I CARE about doing my
work RIGHT and it doesn't MATTER what fucking stream I'm in because I have 9 subjects
which are identical to the fucking 3 Pure ones except for Bio and Chem ANYWAY, AND I have
NP and monitorial duties to worry about PLUS counselling and tuition to juggle, can I help
it? Can I help it if YOU forced the last on me, refusing to let me do it on my own? I
won't say anything else. I don't want to care anymore. It's the only way to get through
all of this without spontaneously combusting.
At least Sakki-neechan's somewhat similar load of
crap is somewhat resolved. =_=
I think I'll fic tomorrow. If I can finish my
homework. If I finish studying for all next weeks' tests. If Oyaji goes to work. *rolls
eyes* Jac, I need to talk to you.
february 23 2001
np: Metallica -- The Unforgiven
...I didn't die. >.> Condensed into one sentence,
it says I HATE SCHOOL. I think Jac's having way too much influence on me lately. But I
digress for now.
I don't feel like doing *anything* now. Considering it
took me two weeks just to type this one entry, I think that's sign enough of how much RL,
Can It All, is draining me. I don't want to write or update my pages or reply to mails or
even chat, although I *will* get around to the last eventually because I miss all my
lovely siblings and tomodachi. *_* *hugs minna* I'm so tired. All I want to do is to get a
full quota of sleep and hide from reality for a while. >< My mood swings of late
have been enough to terrify the neighbour's cockatoo, which hoots and ruffles his feathers
every time I come home pointing my file like a rifle. Not to mention my monitor has
finally Crashed and Burned, and I'm typing this on Niichan's laptop. >.> I'm such a
soft brat. I'll snap out of this. Give me time.
H-m. Looking at my very first CCS fics written back in
99, I am Horrified, to put it mildly. <.< It's like GACK, did I REALLY write THAT?
*points to TOYE with shaking hand* Aiyeeee. >< I hate adolescence. You change so
much every year, and all your past years' stuff look like shit after each Christmas. (and
they are, but that's not my point) Bwae. *stares wistfully at oneesama-tachi's stuff* At
least I have good role models to improve on. XD
I guess I was really airheaded when I first got into CCS
(AN half a page long, funny glossaries, horrible nihongo and exaggerated expressions
anyone?) and I was more concerned about pleasing the general crowd than myself, and yeah.
It's been 2 years, I've mellowed out quite a bit, and I can cautiously say my stuff has
improved from what it used to be. o0; The sad thing is, I do believe I'm starting to
suffer CCS burnout. And I digress again. =_= I need my Yami tanks, dammit. And my
Gravitation DVD.
I miss all of CCi. Drop me a mail, anyone? ;_;
Happy belated tanjoubi to Meg and Amy-oneesama-tachi. I
love you both to pieces.
![you make me want to do [the things i never would]](http://www.angelcities.com/members/shichan/sakds.gif)