# november 19, 2001 #
np: The Freshmen -- The Verve Pipe

0_<;;; : "Hana-chan...."

I'm writing a RuHana blowjob fic. >____> Check here for snip. Yeah, I can't really believe it myself, but hey, Alexandra always inspires me so. Oh, and Alex, did you see this yet? Arcina-san, you prolly don't read my blog, but - you Rock. Yow. ^_^

In other words, I've also finished a one-shot Tsuzuki POV and posted it to the various Yami MLs - should be up on ff.net in a bit. Whee. The MitKo I started also wants to be continued, but dammit, I need to know more about Mitsui and his gundan and the whole quitting-basketball arc. Tonight's SD ep was spiffy - I *like* Kiminobu-kun. ^_^ That 3-pointer made my day (as well as the scenes of Mitsui staring open-mouthed in delight and Mitsui tousling his hair, but heey. XD) Have also decided that Shadow Skill roxx cos Elle Lag roxx. Rant later - I can't remember when I've liked a female lead this much. And Gau is an absolute cutie begging to be slashed.

Things I Hate About The Slam Dunk M/M Ficdom:

Right. Am saying it here cos I don't want to incite flame wars on any SD MLs - People. The SD guys. Are JOCKS. Big strapping jocks who jostle and whap opponents on court. Last I checked, they were supposed, quoth Gwynne, to have dicks. DICKS. So PLEASE fortheloveofGodcosicantstanditanymore, PLEASE stop making Rukawa call Sakuragi "Hana-chan". Or Sakuragi call Rukawa "Kaede-kun", or Mitsui call Kogure "Min-chan", cos it's just so TOTALLY OOC and unrealistic and sounds _disgusting_, dammit. I KNOW Sakuragi gives his teammates pet names. He happens to be just about the only one (besides Jin and Fukuda, from what I've seen) who does that. "Kitsune", "Temee" and "Kisama" are all suitable terms of endearment he gives Rukawa, NOT "Kaede-chan". Rukawa, in turn, hardly ever refers to him as anything but "do'ahou", "ahou" or "temee", at best. Do you seriously think that even if they start boinking they're going to get any more intimate than surnames? Even for MitKo, first-name basis mode of address would already be stretching it a little. YEESH. *squicks*

Next: People. Because the boys are BOYS who are also jocks, it is seriously impossible for me to imagine them giving each other roses on Valentine's Day. Or whatever. And never, as far as I can see, will they play blushing virgins and give poems to confess flaming passion. Come ON - I lean towards mush myself, but I'm pretty sure my characters never swore undying love by the light of a full moon. I can't imagine Sakuragi-tachi saying anything more heavy than "Suki da," and even THAT is, like first names, stretching it some. PLEASE. Adolescent guys. You think they got on the bed out of radiant mutual adoration? >< Focus on the emotional and mental part of their relationship by all means, but for Christsakes make it BELIEVABLE. This love issue in almost all the SD fics I've seen thus far squicks me so intensely I can't even begin to describe it. Doesn't matter if the whole concept of yaoi was onna-fied to begin with; there's a difference between sap and pure maudlin bullshit.

Third: Why so many AUs where the guys are medieval British knights/wizards/royalty? I'm sorry, but 3/4 of these aren't even in coherent English and it's IMO just plain RIDICULOUS. Why place the characters in fantasy situations where they can't behave like we know them? All their character traits come out mostly during b-ball games or other incidents in the *normal* world - why not leave it like that? It really doesn't work to poke Sakuragi into armour and stick him on a charging steed with Rukawa sitting glumly in a tower in a blonde wig, it really doesn't. Sports-centred series rarely translate well into such totally unrelated AUs. Like, GAH.

And as usual, it's amazing how so many people seem to think fics like these are goodspiffyWowcantwaitformoreyouwriteSoWell! Sure, say I'm a snob and bite me. No, I'm not that good a ficcer, nor am I an experienced SD ficcer. But when I *do* fic, my fics, for the most part, come out in readable, grammatical English, my charas usually never do more than border on OOC (aka they're RECOGNISABLE), and whilst I do have something of a reputation for awwcutesapfluffmush, I've always tried to ensure my boys retain a modicum of testosterone. Dig? j0w, you're cool.

Wow, I feel loads better now. =_=v Time to hit sack.

tsuzuki deflowered a sakura tree at 11:52 p.m.