Thursday, March 29, 2007, 11:04 p.m.
《二四零》符雪琳
漫长的夜晚，身子也累了。
熬过这两天，孤独地上课。
当家人睡着，我却在苦战。
做到好辛苦，却不得要领。
霎时的话语，暗示心不满。
收到的讯息，是自己错了。
或许将来事，最好不要管。
因太过敏感，痛哭一小时。
温热的眼泪，冷冻的心房。
无论对或错，都已不重要。
自觉没有错，但无可奈何。
也许想太多，根本是缺点。
是时候反省，不想再重复。
无心的失误，伤的是自己。
重温旧电影，感人也感叹。
新购碟抵达，但没时间看。
郑秀文加场，十分钟卖光。
就算有票买，但已不想去。
希望若越大，失望便更大。
更不想为此，勉强找人陪。
十万吨情缘，浪族阔少爷。
上一次流泪，回来我身边。
一节五个字，共二四零字。
但已经够了，真的足够了。
there are two more additional shows!! they are on 22 and 23 may. according to fans in mantown, ALL the tickets for the first 4 shows are completely sold out. even the wheelchair zones for the first 2 shows are sold out.
its confirmed coz i just managed to enter the urbtix website, and yes, every single price zone is sold out, including the wheelchair zones for the next 2 shows.
and i think there will be internal purchasing again for 22nd and 23rd. so effectively only one more show for the public to purchase. since the website server will be jammed and so will the telephone lines, and fans are already camping overnight at the ticketing counters, i think its really NO CHANCE of buying tickets anymore.
i should have bought during the fanclub priority orders. anyway i wont hold high hopes on it. but im just awed by the power of ah mi. =)
spectrum was quite slack coz i was doing CG. but after this week's easy job, i have to prepare for a tedious day of episodes 4 and 5 next next week. i got a free taxi ride home from uncle tan coz he lives around my area.
busy weekend ahead. channel u will be showing my left eye sees ghost. yay one of my favourite movies. MLESG is really touching, and mi's clothes in it are pretty.
so random.
Monday, March 26, 2007, 11:16 p.m.sammi is one ultimate pop queen.
the internal booking for staff was wiped out in a single day.
the priority booking for bank of china credit card holders and fanclub, which was opened on 12th march, was fully snapped up on the day itself.
and alas, TODAY was first day for public purchase of tickets.
this morning, way before 9am, the urbtix website's server was busy with people trying to book the tickets.
i called the urbtix hotline (yes, the hk hotline) and the nice operator at the other end told me in polite cantonese that this line will only be open for booking tomorrow, and asked me to call another line.
just to sidetrack, i havent spoken to hongkongers in cantonese for quite some time. im glad my cantonese is still quite good. heh.
anyway, the other hotline was hot and i couldnt get through.
so i stopped calling and went to school.
during break, i accessed the urbtix website, and most of the tickets were in limited quantity.
plus they werent adjacent seats generated by the system.
then just now i reached home at 1045pm, and......
all the HK0 tickets are sold out.
the HK0 ones are sold out for the second day (saturday) and are selling fast for the other days.
this is crazy. i think all the tickets would be sold out within these few days. maybe not all since the wheelchair zone might have some vacancies.
but still. ticket sales are unbelievably going off like rockets.
guess i'll have to wait for the additional shows.
not sure if im going yet though, coz i havent asked papa about it.
hurhur.
was so glad that the trend story was finally over. now its time to work on 229. saw spectrum episode 2. even though i couldnt hear it from canteen B, i still feel weird looking at myself on tv. had dinner with the 615 gang. its been ages since i saw them. everyone's still the same. =)
Sunday, March 25, 2007
procrastination is my nemesis.
ssm press conference. soo many videos and photos about it. i was practically on mantown the whole day, constantly updating every one hour or so. some say she became thinner, some say she became fatter. too bad she's not a student in singapore, otherwise she'd fit perfectly well in my trend story.
rewatched UADITSOL. i remembered i liked it a lot, and when it was shown on channel u when we just moved in, sailo and i were so addicted to it that we taped the last few episodes. rewatching part of it, and ooh los angeles looks fabulous! was watching the awakening story in the afternoon on tvbj. i think im going to rent so many maggie shows after exams, which happens to be a coincidence because the shows are really nice.
maggie was once my idol but i gave her up for jessica. i liked both in OTB, and in fact i liked maggie more than jessica in a recipe for the heart. haha anyway it isnt a point. the point is, this is what happens when tvb refuses to release the master of tai chi- i switch to other old shows. the new shows just dont appeal to me. im nolstagic. its obvious because i buy the old-like-nothing albums and watch tvb dramas that were filmed 15 years ago. bah.
Saturday, March 24, 2007
did housework and stuffs. was quite upset that my favourite yellow tee was washed together with the black clothes, while papa's greyish-blue shirt was washed with the whites. now my tee has greyish colouring on the collar. :(
Friday, March 23, 2007
collected 5 tvb weekly magazines, and the auntie promised to keep the magazines with mi on the cover for me. collected the questionnaires from cuicui. thanks so much!! saw that the tickets for ssm would be open to public for purchase on monday. was happily watching a life of his own (previously i got the name wrong, my apologies) until i realised i only have 6 episodes.
Thursday, March 22, 2007, 11:35 p.m.havent had the time to blog so here's a short recap of the main events that happened each day.
nothing especially interesting today. finished rewatching DOC. am currently patiently getting a life of one's own. finally i see some nice fan sharing it with us. the show is out on vcd but i dont know why it isnt sold in singapore.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
collected infernal affairs 3 vcd. i just forwarded all the way to the end to watch the less-than-a-minute appearance of sammi. next time when im free i will watch the whole movie without forwarding.
astronomy was interesting, because today's topic was about the black hole. but i still fell asleep for a while in the middle of it.
passed pppt shine on you and ITA vcds. havent seen her since the conrad getaway. guess everyone's too busy to meet up.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
was quite nervous during spectrum coz of the interview. even though being in front of the camera is less stressing than decision-making roles in studio, i was still jittery coz i wasnt used to it.
diya was super nice. and inside her was truly the fun-loving side of her, and an ordinary girl who has no airs whatsoever. and she was so nice to oblige for a song at the end of the interview, even though she said she sounded like a toad that night. and she was nice to take photos with all of us. pardon the limited vocabulary coz im not in the right state of mind to think of various synonyms of "nice". im too sleepy to think straight.
anyway, you're supposed to watch nanyang spectrum so im not revealing the interview contents. i think its not out yet, but episode 1 is out already. so stay tuned. it should be available online but uncle tan hasnt put it up on the server yet. i will put up some photos but not today coz im falling asleep.
Monday, March 19, 2007
my trend was approved. :) going on to work on it.
Sunday, March 18, 2007, 11:30 p.m.昨晚读了Ah Mi 的輕描淡寫，有个冲动想用中文来表达感情。发现其
实我们有一些共同点，例如我们都不能看恐怖片，都喜欢吃鸡蛋，非
常讨厌报纸的油墨，喜欢坐长途车，超喜爱日本食物。但是也有很多
差别之处，我想差别多过相同。每个人应该会和其他人有一些些相同，
没有一个完全极端的像或不像，因为大家多少有自己独特的一面，也
最起码，大家同样是人。
发觉每当我在家的时候，总是会特别轻松。所以当处于紧急状态的考
试日子时，好想“离家出走”。正如每次在家享受电视带来的乐趣时，
会惭愧地想起自己有多少projects 未完成。家对于我来说，是一个避
风塘，一个安乐窝，不是一个办公室。这个学期有一半的课程是需要
坐稳苦背，另一半是不断地实践，向外求救才能完工。
其实近日没什么特别的事情，可是我总爱浪费时间在无谓的写作和娱
乐。若非想写这堆东西，我早就已经在梦乡了。最近在重看《下一站
彩虹》，Elaine 什么都好，就是缺乏安全感。一直重看美珩和
Sammi 的戏，我应该都背熟了。如果我能够对功课有这般热忱和好
记忆就好了。。。
为自己设下了许多计划，要在什么时候完成什么事，但是却一直无法
实行。
想运动，没毅力。
想阅读，没耐心。
想收拾，没头绪。
想出国，没资金。
想逛街，没时间。
想偷懒，爸爸骂。
好想快快考完试，以上的事才有机会完成，爸爸也不会骂。
HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY MEIQI!
went to the food fair with gujie, and bought home a lot of food. maybe because we ate quite a number of heaty food there, thus half of the items we bought back were cooling foodstuffs, like herbal jelly, grass jelly, etc.
saved all the issues of 輕描淡寫. after exams, i shall compile all of mi's articles into a book myself, with nice alignment and cover page. this is one time when i cant wait for exams to hurry come and go. the project-period is the hardest to go by, especially when i have to work on a project/subject that ive never liked. boohoo.
Friday, March 16, 2007
collected the three sammi cds. they were super old but in very good condition. the seller was obviously clearing away all her sammi cds.
and i bought shocking pink cd from sembawang. yet the case was cracked! buying second-hand, in this case, is better than first hand which got me a cracked case.
went to the money changer to exchange for hk dollars. he said the smallest note was HK0. fine, i paid, and in the end i received five HK0 notes. -_-"" i wanted to change back HK0 coz i only needed HK0, but i figured i may need it in case i go hk or something. so in conclusion, the money changer fellow doesnt know the meaning of "smallest note".
Thursday, March 15, 2007
ponned accounting tutorial coz i didnt do my tutorial and i was quite late for class. might as well use that 1.5 hours to work on my biz law tutorial and (urgh) 203.
i cried like nothing while watching today's episode of making miracles.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
i went back to LT4 to search for my earrings. guess what? i couldnt find them.
Tuesday, March 13, 2007, 11:25 p.m.yesterday was alright. basically my mondays are quite okay because they are all lectures. but during business law lecture, my ears got kind of itchy, so i removed my earrings. then, after lecture, i packed my stuffs and left the LT...
... without the pair of earrings.
i only realised it when i got home. when it hit me, i was so dumbfounded that i didnt know whether to be angry with myself, be upset, or be indifferent about it.
i am angry with myself, and still am, because its one of the stupidest careless mistakes that ive been making. am upset because the pair of earrings, which had the playboy rabbit on it and looked similar to the pair ko ling wore in lfd, was one of my favourites and it went along to hk with me last year. it wasnt expensive, just .50, and the eye of one rabbit had already fell off. yet i am still hoping to find it back.
but why indifferent? because this isnt the first time i lost an accessory. in 2005 i dropped a bracelet after fetching sammi (ive mentioned it about thrice already), and that time i felt the anger and sadness too. but i managed to find another piece of the same bracelet, so maybe it was meant to be lost. similarly, maybe the earrings were meant to be lost as well.
i initially wanted to go back to the LT this morning to search for it, but i was really reluctant to wake up at 6am so that i could reach before any lessons took place before 830am. maybe i should just forget about the earrings and move on to look for another pair. but still, i miss the earrings a whole lot. very very much.
the end of expressing my heartbreak. or maybe not, because im going on to another slightly less disappointing issue. yesterday (12 march) the internal bookings for ssm for bank of china credit card holders opened, and guess what? the HK0 tickets for all 4 shows were sold out before evening. and it hasnt opened to the public yet! so now while the privileged few can still book the cheaper tickets, by the end of the advanced booking date (friday), all the remaining tickets are probably going to be sold out. full house.
on one hand im glad because it shows how attractive mi is. everybody cannot wait to see mi in concert, because so many of them bought tickets for all 4 shows, and in bulk. when i mean bulk, i mean buying >100 tickets per show per person. :|
but on the other hand, i certainly cannot go for it lah. since there arent anymore tickets to buy in the first place, and i didnt order from sbs when they had exclusive priority, because no one wants to go with me. ive been drumming on the fact that no one is going with me.
anyway, maybe its just fated, that i didnt/havent ordered tickets because if they are going to add shows, i still have a chance to get hold of tickets. or maybe mi will embark on a world tour to singapore. or maybe... im just giving myself hopes.
okay, really the end of depressing topics. spectrum today was stressing, because it was the first time we did actual recording live and i was the studio director. we took 2.5 takes to finally get the confirmed recording. a little glitches here and there from us, but a great experience nevertheless.
SD is quite alright except for the stress part. dr chua rearranged my roles for next week, so instead of being interviewer for episode 3, im now interviewing for episode 2, and the guest for ep.2 is diya. even more stressed! because more people will be anticipating it, so all the more i cannot ask stupid questions.
dinner with my spectrum mates was so hilarious and fun. we spent so much time laughing at the slightest things. we should have such dinners more often.
feeling sleepy after being stressed out. projects are piling up. dont like doing tutorials every week for my business subjects.
but, in my opinion, nothing is worse than newswriting,. urgh.
Sunday, March 11, 2007, 11:08 p.m.i've s/u-ed accounting.
i've just bought three old and retired sammi cds.
even though they are slightly cheaper than those in hk auctions, i still feel the pinch.
i still havent paid for infernal affairs vcd.
the needing you puzzles and infernal affairs 3 are on their way here.
and so is the US.
i just spent what i earned. :(
it may seem that i spent so much on sammi.
but actually, i spent the most on wenfang.
2 years compared to 12 years.
so now everyone knows where my money goes.
i received love is... and tender cds! ive waited for them since january. i love the tender pictures, because i really like mi's short hairstyle in marry a rich man, but too bad tender came without the outer casing. but both cds are the long casing versions! which is just great because there arent any long casing versions available in singapore anymore.
as my sammi cds collection increases, i begin to like more songs that were not popular before. all the 冷门 songs instead of 主打歌. im not going to list them out coz it will take up a lot of space.
worried about so many things. trend story, final project, ssm concert.. im blogging more about idol stuffs because i think its the safest topic to blog about.
lfd rocks. =)
Friday, March 9, 2007
went shopping with the girls. was great coz i havent been out shopping like that for a long time. yiling and i are quite certain that the woman at the underpass between tangs and lido is hezheng. hahaha.
was happy to find jet magazine with mi on the cover, it was so expensive but i bought it anyway. books interest me but i know i usually buy on impulse. like the jet magazine, i already have the online version, and nevertheless the hard copy is now right smack on my desk. i wanted to get the judy blume set (tales of a fourth grade nothing, superfudge, and the rest that i liked when i was young) but i think i'd chuck them aside after buying them. that happened to my 老师的提包 which was recommended by mi but i havent got down to reading it. same goes for 碧血剑, i stopped reading it when there were no more parts with wenyi, and i didnt touch part two. you get the picture.
the offer made by sbs to order tickets for overseas fans was closed a week earlier than stipulated. which means if i manage to find someone to go with me, i'll have to buy them myself.
was re-listening to needing you radio broadcast that i fell asleep. hooray to wah-siu and kinki. ive bought so many needing you stuffs online. the puzzles are on their way here.
Thursday, March 8, 2007
was demoralised twice in a day. how sad can that be.
thank 菩萨 for home. i practically forget everything unhappy when im at home. unless im unhappy about home affairs, which doesnt link to the demoralising issue.
Wednesday, March 7, 2007, 11:36 p.m.division selection talk reminded everyone about the times of 201. it has been such a long time since we had so many of us gathered in the LT. it appeared more like a gathering of faculties and students, rather than a talk. im glad we have such hilarious and nice professors in cs (not all though, but most of them).
and i realised whenever we come out from the LT, we never fail to crowd around the LT door in our own cliques, and i have no idea why and what we like to discuss outside the door. and strangely, we crowd outside one door instead of the other. sometimes we just crowd around for the sake of not being left out but seriously, most of the time there was nothing much to discuss about but we just always talk, talk and talk.
finally there's news of my pretty meiheng. previously we know she went back to san francisco for cny (okay only hardcore meiheng fans know, like me), and now shes back in hk, and still shopping at her favourite hunt: admiralty taikoo shopping mall. the news point is, the reporters speculated that she might be pregnant.
!!!!!!!!
hahaha i kind of figured there's such a possibility. her holiday lasted for almost a full year; im not surprised if she got married during this period of time. knowing her style, meiheng's the super super low-profile type, and i really like her for being low-profile. if she's really pregnant, im absolutely happy for her, because i think 对于女人来说，结婚生子是非常幸福的事. (i can type in english but im just lazy.) in my opinion, there are two possibilities:
1. meiheng's really pregnant, or
2. she merely put on weight and the reporters are making a wild guess.
hohoho. we shall see.
Tuesday, March 6, 2007, 11:59 p.m.recess ended yesterday.
am getting worried about the trend story.
even though it was e-learning week for business subjects, it made no difference to me.
yunxin and i did the stupidest thing yesterday.
we wanted to copy the media log file from avid, but the programme didnt allow for copying in bulk.
so we copied row by row, column by column.
then, we realised the stuff we copied were exactly the same as the paper edit.
which meant we copied for nothing, because the real media log should have things not listed in the avid media log.
anyway, we laughed at ourselves for being ridiculously stupid.
was thinking whether i should s/u accounting or astronomy.
maybe accounting, because astronomy's exam is all mcqs so i dont see a point in s/u-ing it, except for the fact that the next day is 203 exam.
spectrum rehearsal was enriching.
first try at being a studio director, with interview segment included.
our dry runs before cny didnt have interviews.
was quite nervous, but nevertheless we managed to end off with a good rehearsal.
many thanks to the whole spectrum team, although we had about 5-6 rehearsals in all.
i've probably thanked everyone in spectrum a hundred times; they kept saying i was such a polite SD.
was feeling better after the rantings in the previous post.
therefore saturday and sunday were spent making notes for accounting.
so much work to do, and it'd probably not end until the exams are over.
愛情萬歲 is still on the repeat mode in my playlist.
ladies first has become my permanent alarm music.
rewatched family man on sunday. im not buying/renting any shows until exams are over.
so its back to the old tvb dramas during meals.
im really writing random thoughts.
division selection talk tomorrow.
nowadays, most people in cs start conversations with:
"which division you want to go?"
very soon we will be choosing internship companies, fyp groupmates and mentor, and choosing jobs after we graduate.
life is full of choices, whether or not you have a say in it.
same goes, i chose to open the window of my room.
but of all rooms, the darn bug chose my room to fly in.
maybe my room is the brightest in the whole block.
but anyway, the stupid bug kept buzzzzzing and flying around the lights non-stop.
i cant stand the buzzing insect sound, not to mention having an animal with wings in the house.
it then dawned on me that it's the season of the buggies.
when i say season, i mean the season when the weather at night is so cold that the bugs go in search of a warm light.
and every single year, the same type of bug flies into my room during those seasons.
thats why i always close my windows during those times, but papa thinks i am paranoid about those creatures.
of course la, the bugs dont like to fly into his room.
and guys in my house dont give a hoot about insects disrupting our lives.
i'd rather turn on the air-con and huddle under the blankets than to let another dumb bug enter my room.
费了九牛二虎之力才成功干掉那只虫。
grrr.
so you see, my entries are random after the few days of not blogging.
time to perk up and get moving.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUJIE!
yesterday went kbox with yimyiu, kiaying and tracey.
had a fun time singing.
realised that ive been living in the past music industry.
the only new song that i know is sammi's new song.
envious of people who have dreams and goals.
like tracey, she wants to be a singer.
i believe she can, because she has a powerful voice, just like cuilin.
for a period of time, i had my dreams too.
but as time passes, i get unsure of what i want.
everything seems out of reach to me.
am feeling lost in such low-esteem periods.
习惯是否能让自己好过一些？
昨晚吃晚饭后突然一阵胃痛，痛苦不堪。
但因为不想半夜劳烦家人，只好忍着。
忍着，忍着。不久后就习惯了痛楚，煎熬地睡了一晚。
习惯是否能为其他人好?
每天尽力地做好应分，得来的却是无数贬踩。
舍己为人，但需要支持时却没人理睬。
但是，已经习惯自食其力。
不想发生争拗，更不想欠人情。
他人庆幸没麻烦找上门。
皆因自己已习惯所有感受独自吞。
最近感觉实在无隐私可言。
自己想做的事总是受到阻碍。
再这样下去，可能会把这里关掉。
那么，以后真的所有事都藏在心里。
也许，只因不善于表达感情，才会落到这个田地。
心里有一百个问号。
心里有一百个烦恼。
-------------------------
我不快樂- 鄭秀文
曲 : 深白色 詞 : 深白色
不是不夠幸福 不是感到孤獨
不是因為羨慕 不是因為忌妒
心里空空的 在想什么 我也不清楚
沒緣沒故 就突然想哭
不知如何傾訴 不知向誰傾訴
不知如何追溯 開始覺得恍惚
感覺到自己 一點一滴 慢慢的干枯
空空湯湯 心沒有所屬
沒有話說 只想要獨處把自己放逐
別找話說 所有的安慰都變成錯誤
我不快樂 不知道為什么可是我不快樂
彷佛跟全世界都有著隔閡
獨自呼吸著悶住胸口的苦澀
我真的不快樂 說不出為什么可是我真的不快樂
彷佛天地間只剩下我一個
一切變得蕭瑟 在這個不確定的時刻
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