Friday, December 28, 2001
np: Words That We Couldn't Say - Kanno Yoko, Steve Conte [Bebop]
I'm bored! I'm booored~~! No one's online... ;_; Someone come talk to me~!
I really ought not to listen to all the depressing Bebop songs I have. But I'm just in a mood to listen to them. And listening to them also makes me want to watch all those Faye and Spike/Julia/Vicious episodes all over again, especially the last disc. >_>; Which makes me think of how I wanted to wring Spike's neck for being an idiot those last couple of episodes. And that I had to bite my lip to keep from screaming at the screen, because then Sis would have given me Odd Looks. And I wanted to scream at Faye to not let him get away, dammit! Don't shoot the _ceiling_, shoot his legs! /That'll/ keep him from getting away! Jet, you idiot! Stop acting like you don't give a damn! XO OTOH, Spike and Jet's reactions at the end of the 24th episode and the beginning of the 25th were horribly amusing. XD;; Ein is too cute. I don't like dogs much. I'm a cat person. But I want an Ein. X3 I'm not too sure I'd want a genius cat. It'd probably sit there quietly laughing at me.
I went to the dentist's office yesterday as a follow-up appointment for last week and to get the stitches removed. I thought it'd hurt, but it didn't. The dentist just kinda went *snip snip snip* and pulled them out. Apparently I'm healing really well too. The entire appointment was less than ten minutes. ^^;
Afterwards, I went to the George Memorial Library to return the HP audio tapes I borrowed a couple weeks ago. I didn't even finish one tape's worth, because it bored me to death. ^^; I wandered around for about two hours. I checked out Watership Down (which I read in elementary, but I can't remember anything about it except that it has evil bunnies...my memory really sucks ^^;;), Tales of Watership Down, which seems to be a bunch of folk tales and short stories of that little universe, The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman, which is first in the series "His Dark Materials", and Stardust by Neil Gaiman (it's Neil Gaiman. 'nuff said.). I was hoping that there'd be more Gaiman stuff, but it's all either checked out or at other libraries in the district. And there's only one copy of American Gods in the entire district, and it's checked out. ;_; Shadow of the Hegemon by Orson Scott Card wasn't available either, but I finally caved in and decided to reserve it. I haven't been reading anywhere near enough books lately. _o_ So many books I want to read, but the only non-school novels I've read the last few months were HP and Sunnyvale: The Rise and Fall of a Silicon Valley Family. And Sunnyvale was horribly depressing. Very very good, but very very depressing. Not a good thing to read when one is trying to escape from real life. >.<;;
I thought of checking out HP: Goblet of Fire for Sis and Dad, but they were all checked out. _o_ According to the catalogue, a few of the books are over two months overdue. T_T Dad's gotten really into Harry Potter. *nita* He finished Philosopher's Stone within a couple of weeks, Chamber of Secrets in about a week, and for Prisoner of Azkaban, he started one afternoon and finished that same night. XD;; All this when he was supposedly "very busy." X3 And Dad hardly ever reads fiction. He likes fiction, but most of the time, he just reads medical journals, magazines, and watches TV. He'll read an average of...maybe one fiction book in a year or two. So this makes it all so much more amusing. It's too fun to walk into his room to check what he's doing and see him lying down reading HP, looking very serious and putting lots of concentration into it. XD XD XD
And while I was lounging in the comfy chairs in the library, I was flipping through a comprehensive, unabridged version of Anne Frank's Diary. Freaking huge hardback. It had about 175 pages of notes and background stuff. And then about 600 pages devoted to the actual diary, which compared two (and sometimes three) versions of the diary - the unabridged version exclusive to that book, and the more widely published abridged one. I never actually read the Anne Frank's Diary - only the play for school in eighth grade. And it's, um, really interesting to see her varying thoughts on Peter from the beginning, middle, and end. Halfway through, she's gushing over him. Oh, he's so sweet, oh, I wish I knew what he thought about our relationship, oh, he kissed me, oh, oh, oh!!! Eurgh. And near the end of the book, she's more like... Oh, it's Peter. Isn't he cute. Silly boy. In the unabridged translations, she goes on and on about masturbation and Peter telling her she's so brave for losing one or two liters of blood every month during her period. o_O;; I think I'd be quite nearly dead by now if I lost that much blood every month. And on several occaisions, she cheerfully writes about how their meals are quite splendid that week, because they have lots of rotten potatoes and beans and such, instead of fresh ones. I honestly couldn't tell if she was being sarcastic or not. o_o;;
I'd be reading the library books right now, but my attention span has been pretty pathetic the last couple months. Heck, it took me an entire week to get through Bebop, even though it's Christmas break, which is an amazingly short amount of time for me. ^^;; Oh, and about Bebop... >D Nont decided to go on a spending spree and buy Cowboy Bebop: The Perfect Sessions: Limited Edition DVD Box Set, among other things. It also came with the original Japanese first OST. <3 And, well. I decided to put it somewhere Nont wouldn't look. Outta sight, outta mind. So he forgot to bring it with him when he left. >D And since we spent so much on the box set at Animagic, I got to have a free Bebop poster! w00t! Just one of those bootlegs, but I'm not complaining. XD And I'm going to have to go back there sometime, since now they have posters for tons more series than before. KKJ, DN Angel, Trigun, Lain, and of course, Bebop. X3
Nont also decided to buy tons of Dreamcast games. And since he decided he just couldn't wait till he got back to his apartment in Dallas to play them, he bought a used one from Gamespot. >_>;; So now I have a Dreamcast. XD;; Nont decided to leave behind Four Wheel Thunder, Lodoss Wars (which looks rather boring to me _o_), Greatest Arcade Hits II, and some crappy game I don't remember the name of. Greatest Arcade Hits II has Gauntlet!!! I love Gauntlet! XD XD XD I need to drag friends over to play it. Because Gauntlet is just too fun for words. X3 And now we can have multi-player games without pushing and shoving for space at the keyboard. "Move it move it! You're covering my keys!" "You move it! I can barely reach my keys!" "Argh! My hands are cramping up! I'm sitting in the middle next time!" ^_^;;
And then there was the gay elf thing going around that night. And the day before we went to watch Lord of the Rings, no less. XD There's four players to choose from in Gauntlet - the warrior, valkerie, wizard and elf, and there's also four different colors. Say, a green elf is low on HP. A ridiculous deep voice will say, "Green elf needs FOOD, badly. Green elf is about to die." And the elf makes undeniably gay sounds when he receives a lot of damage. The elf is also the weakest, but fastest character in the game. So Nick was saying, "I need to be the gay elf! So I can steal all the treasure!" But my mom, who was in the next room, heard only part of it. "WHAT?! Your'e a GAY ELF?!?!" So we mercilessly teased the rest of the night about that. >D "Nick, you're depriving our poor, poor mother of grandchildren! How could you?!" And when Nick left to get a drink in the kitchen, I imitated the voice over in the game: "Purple Nick needs MAN, badly. Purple Nick is about to die." *koffs* Nont and Nick are very squicked by male slashiness and yaoi stories. And they think it's very Wrong that Wiriya and I find slashiness Amusing (though Wiriya significantly less so). But Nont finds Purple Nick needing MAN, badly, very amusing. And laughed very loudly and repeated it to Nick. I ran and hid behind Wiriya. ^_^;;
So when we went to watch LotR late Sunday morning, I kept muttering in Wiriya's ear about Gay Elves, partially because of Purple Elf-Nick, and partially because Legolas was Gay. (And speaking of Legolas, my hormones need to be whapped too. Bell-san, I'll whap yours, you'll whap mine?) And at the end, when Sam and Frodo were hugging, Nont was muttering in my ear about Gay Hobbits. And Nick fell asleep a couple of times. And we all agreed that it ought to be illegal to show many many waterfalls in HP and LoTR length movies. Especially near the end. LotR did kick ass, even if it is certainly lacking in the plot department. But the movie crew can't exactly do much for that anyway. And I want the LotR soundtrack. It was much better than John Williams' HP music. :p Afterwards, it was agreed that Dragonlance: Chronicles would have made a much better movie than LotR. Because Dragonlance has things like plot! And an Angsty!Half-elf! (though Legolas is Prettier than Tanis) And mages that actually do something! (Besides whack each other with staves and look cool. I want a Gandalf hat. :3 That's the kind of hat that Hogwarts students should have had. Not those dopey dunce caps.) And Gimli never interested me much. Flint, on the other hand, is a very cool dwarf. X3 Though admittedly, Goldmoon and Riverwind were rather boring. :p
*ahem* Please excuse my Dragonlance fangirl side. I need to read that again. I've read Chronicles twice, but that was way back when I was in elementary. ^^;; And on LotR, yes, Tolkien made a fantastic world and history. He would have made an excellent D&D Dungeon Master. I just wish he had spent half the amount of time on the plot and pacing and writing as he did making up the world and histories and perfect languages. XP And I'll avoid HP vs. LotR (at least for now). Because they're nothing alike. So I wish people wouldn't compare them. XP
"I have sinned enough against the world. Teaching magic to a kender would ensure my damnation." ~Raistlin Majere
...XD;;
kamikaze ~ 07:26 p.m. ::
Thursday, December 27, 2001
np: Blue - Yamane Mai, Seatbelts [Bebop Session 26 Ed Credits]
Just finished watching Bebop. I think I'll go stab myself with some cookie cutters now.
Oh, and I like SpikexFaye. Scratch that; I love it to bits. Spike no baka. T_T
*twitch* "YOU'RE GONNA CARRY THAT WEIGHT." Arrrgh.
kamikaze ~ 01:38 a.m. ::
Tuesday, December 25, 2001
np: Welcome to X'mas! - Di Gi Charat, Petit Charat, & Rabi~en~Rose
*pokes pitas* I managed to log in before the day's end! Though apparently I'm the only that Pitas hasn't been working for for the past few days. _o_
Anyhoo...
Happy Christmas everyone~! <3 <3 <3 I'll dispose of my Not-A-Huggy-Person Aura (which certain persons refuse to acknowledge) to give a everyone a well deserved glomp. <3
And quite belated birthday wishes to Pheonix-san! Have fun with all your sparkly presents! *niko* My dumb Niisan who accidently ran off with my floppy containing the KKJ translations last time he was home brought it back, so that'll be arriving in your inbox sometime before Christmas break ends. ^^;;
Ooh... My Christmas mix just switched to Daisuke to Ken no Kaimono Carol. XD~~~ BABY. Kurismasu daze~
kamikaze ~ 11:48 p.m. ::
Tuesday, December 18, 2001
np: Mad Sky (Goutetsu no Messiah) - Pierrot
Had my four wisdom teeth yanked out of my gums yesterday afternoon. I now have only 24 teeth left. >_o;; Damned humongous teeth in a freakishly small mouth. (Lady at the orthodontist's office trying to stick a mirror in my mouth to take photos: "What a tiny mouth you have! I'll have to use a smaller mirror! Nope! That's too big too! I don't think I've ever dealt with a patient with such a small mouth!" >__>;;)
Surprisingly, it wasn't anywhere near as bad (painful) as when I had four other teeth pulled out a few years ago before I got my braces. Then again, that probably has to do with the fact that I was completely concious and lucid that time 4 1/2 years ago. (I still distincly recall the dentist saying, "That's one~<3 *holds up bloody tooth* Only three more to go~! <3 <3 <3") And yesterday, I was completely out of it and unconcious through a lot of it. I took Phenergan and Halcion an hour before the appointment, so it all seems like a dream now. o_O;; I vaguely remember stumbling around before the appointment and asking my mom if the medicines caused vertigo. "Yes! Of course" ">__> I wish you'd told me that earlier." Stumble stumble stumble. And later she had to drag me to the office holding my arm because I couldn't really walk on my own. And something they gave me made me really twitchy too. Irrational as my mind was at the time, I remember considering waving my hands around a bit to ask if I could get up and move around a bit, because the twitchiness was really bothering me. >_>;; I tried to control it, but that didn't exactly work. Though if I hadn't tried to control it, I probably would have been twitching all over the place. As it was, someone already commented that, "Yes, that medicine does make you rather twitchy, doesn't it?" For some reason, I was paranoid about the dentist not pulling out the right teeth, and I had to fight the urge to ask them to make sure. After it was all over, and they had left me in the chair for awhile, they put me in a wheelchair and brought me out. My legs didn't seem to want to move on their own, so the lady had to manually stick my legs in it. >.>; I had to ask my mom later whether they had brought me out in a wheelchair to make sure it wasn't all some bizarre dream. o_O;;
It seems like I bled a lot less this time around, but that might just be because I was unconcious for a few hours after the surgery. At least I didn't have to keep going the sink to spit out the blood. And now that I've eaten, I don't have the constant taste of blood in my mouth now. But I'm probably going to be reeeaaally sick of mashed potatoes and yogurt (Blech. Hate the stuff. Mom's making me eat it for the live yogurt cultures.) by the end of the week. I ate a bit of zuchinni and turkey and cornbread and mashed it around with the spoon and my tongue, but it took a ridculously long time for me to eat it. XP I keep on having to fight the urge to bring it to the back of my mouth and just chew. I really don't want to have to deal with digging crumbs out of the miniature pools of blood back there. >_o
I'm going back next week to have the stitches taken out. That'll be fun. >_o;;
kamikaze ~ 02:25 p.m. ::
Sunday, December 16, 2001
np: Fly Me to the Moon - Frank Sinatra
Ooh. New HP Christmas fun over at the Puppy Farm. One Christmas fluff fic (alas, not the smutty one, which has been postponed), and one filk. Called Remus the Teenaged Werewolf. XD;; Off to read the read the fluff fic. *bounce*
kamikaze ~ 12:44 p.m. ::
Saturday, December 15, 2001
np: Welcome to Christmas [Di Gi Charat]
Ugh...lots of ranting and guilt trips ahead.
I feel like crap. I shouldn't. I just came back from a very fun orchestra Christmas party/progressive dinner. But instead I'm sitting here crying. I was planning on coming home and cheerfully blogging about the last five hours. But instead I sat on the counch for a while, thinking about the night's guilt trips and wondering why I felt just a bit irritated. And as soon as I realized what I was irritated about, I felt worse. Guilty again. And I started doing what I do everytime I feel bad in any sort of way about anything. I think about it more and more and analyze it to death, and I just end up depressing myself until I break down.
I suppose it started when I looked at the clock and noticed that it was about a quarter till nine. Almost time for the funeral to start. Nont attended a funeral earlier tonight for his friend Vanessa, who worked in the World Trade Center buildings. They just identified her remains last week. And I felt like I shouldn't be having so much fun. I remember meeting Vanessa at Nont's graduation in the May of 2000. She seemed quite nice. I wandered off to a relatively quiet spot to think. And I thought that people wouldn't want me to worry so much. They would've just wanted me to have fun, right? So I did. But I still can't help but feel guilty about it.
And then at the end of the progressive dinner, there's the White Elephant gifts. Just a little game. Basically, people who want to participate bring some sort of gift. It can be anything - something really nice, really cheap, really silly. And we're given little numbered slips of paper to determine the order. Whoever's up can either choose a gift from the pile or steal from someone who's already gotten a present, as long as it hasn't already been stolen three times. And a person stolen from can either choose a new present from the pile or steal something else, as long as it hasn't already been stolen too many times or isn't whatever was just stolen. Ugh...I know it's just silly to feel bad about something that's just a little game.
I was second to go up, and ended up getting a little set of things - a stuffed Teletubby (disturbing, I know), matchbox cars, and crayons. I didn't really want it, so of course I tried to get others to steal from me. Andrew ended up stealing my stuff near the end, and I stole a cute stuffed panda from Kristen, who had already stolen it from someone else. Well, I caught her eye and cheerfully waved at her to get my point across, because it's just not my thing to be shout across a room. Someone else threw it towards me, and as soon as I caught it, I wanted to just give it back. She was giving me this look, as if to say, "How could you?" I gave the bear to Sarah to look at, as I didn't really want to look at it at the moment. Guilt guilt guilt. Stupid to feel that way, really. It's just a freaking game. And later on, the girl who originally had the panda stole it back. I felt disappointed since I rather liked the panda, but I smiled and gave it to her. A part of me felt relieved to get rid of it. And then, being the ever perceptive person I am, I decided to steal some fluffy purple Monopoly house slippers from Nina. Who is also a small cute girl whom everyone loves and is rather too good at pouting. She gave me the exact same look as Kristen. Guilt guilt guilt. I tried not to think about it and fiddled with my camera for a while. So I'm not really sure how it happened. But I think James, who got Lindsey her horse toy back eariler on by sacrificing his chance for a gift, told Nina to steal what he had, so he could steal the slippers back for her. I thought it was very nice of him, really. I laughed and gave the slippers to him. Somehow I felt a bit miffed, but hey, at least that's one guilt trip I won't have to deal with. I ended up stealing Alan's Candyland boardgame, which is what I still have. I kept on glancing back at him, afraid that he would show some sign of being disappointed. Which I thought was very unlikely, as Alan isn't that kind of person. But I was worried and I probably would have broken down if he did. Stupid stupid stupid. It's just a little game.
Well, I didn't really know exactly why I was a bit irritated at the time. After I thought about it for a while when I got home, I think I know why. It's not even the loss of the panda and slippers I really liked that bother me. I wish I still had one of those, but I still got something I liked in the end of my choice, and the stealing is all part of the game. I was a lot luckier with my present than a lot of other people, so I'm happy about that. But...I can help but think... Well. James isn't even a close friend of Nina's. So, the obvious deduction is that I'm not as important as her. They're more worth it. I'm not a cutesy little girl. I don't pout adorably and constantly wear my heart on my sleeve. So obviously, I don't feel as strongly about it. I obviously don't really want that, because I'm not squealing and gushing over it. I'm not pouting, so I didn't really want it that much in the first place. I'm just selfish because I didn't think of how awful I was being for taking it away from her. So someone has to right this wrong! Oh, yes, James is so nice. Giving it back to the person who really wanted it. Vinita doesn't matter. If she's not outright ranting or crying, she's okay. Oh, look. Vinita's laughing and smiling, so obviously she's feeling great. Don't bother to ask her how she is. Don't bother to ask her why she might have been depressed. Why she's here visiting us at school is obviously more important. Don't ever call her. Don't ever email her. After all, we're too busy even over Thanksgiving break to do such a thing. Oh, her mother had a heart attack and she was the only other one home? Her mom had a heart attack because she was stressing out over Vinita's health? Don't fucking call her to ask if she's alright. She's not fucking breaking down. She's not having a guilt trip from hell. She's alright. Look, she's smiling! She's okay.
...Fuck it. My head hurts like hell. I think I have a fever. I'm going to bed.
kamikaze ~ 11:16 p.m. ::
Wednesday, December 12, 2001
np: Egao ni Aitai (I Want to See Your Smile) - Hamada Rie [Marmalade Boy Op]
......
Okay, it's really really wrong to have this playing while I still have the Snape skin up.
......
No, no, no. Go away, evil thoughts! >__> The image of Snape prancing around in the Mirror of Erised (I'm sure this is somehow all your fault, Tin-san) and singing and generally acting very Miki-ish won't go awaaaay. "My books, my uniform! My hair isn't dry yet~! Ah, help~! My hair ribbon isn't right~~!"
Noooo, make it stoooop.
"Doushio? Doushiooo~?"
Iyaaaaan. ;_;
kamikaze ~ 12:48 a.m. ::
Tuesday, December 11, 2001
Now Playing: Voodoo - Godsmack
*leers* Listening to Snape on drugs while staring at Snape is too much. >D
Yup yup~<3 <3 <3 The Snape/Alan Rickman skin is now available, courtesy of Ragabash and the Snape/Alan Rickman Estrogen Brigade. Along with all the other horribly sparkly skins that Ragabash has finished. And surely everyone feels the urge to leer at Snape and Lan and then promptly die from sugar shock from all the Koge Donbo stuff up there. <3
kamikaze ~ 11:41 p.m. ::
Sunday, December 9, 2001
Now Playing: Melodies of Life (The Layers of Harmony) - Shiratori Emiko [FF IX]
Happy happy birthday to Cindy and Bell-san~! <3 <3 <3 I demand that both of you do your best to have a happy, fun, and sparkly birthday! 'Specially you, Cindy. Go relax and get high on Starbucks and be sparkly with your health-fanatic boyfriend. ^_~ After all, you certainly need to get unstressed! And besides, it's not everyday you're suddenly a "legal adult", ne? X3
...and for the record, I didn't even notice that you two shared the same birthday till about half an hour ago. XD;
And before I forget for the millionth time, hello hello hello~<3 to Shi-san, Sarah-san, Ruby-san, and of course, Bell-san, who all linked to me during my month of nearly non-existant blogging. ^^; And~! For various reasons, I think I'm in a blogging mood once more~<3
But for now, I'll go back to eating my yummy Krispy Kremes doughnut. Envy me. <3
kamikaze ~ 12:54 a.m. ::
Friday, November 30, 2001
Now Playing: Dress Me Up [English Ver.] - Olivia
Happy birthday to Tin-san~! May you forever be blessed with Happy Wrong Thoughts~<3 Especially those concerning slut!Snape. XD;;
After I finished traumatizing my sis (on her birthday, no less X3) with Tin-san's oh-so-cackle-worthy musings on gay reindeer and "I'm a Snape for You" (Don't follow that link if you were planning to, Cindy. I want you to be traumatized in person. >D) and Janaki-san's offering to the mighty god of Harry Potter legos, Rupert Grint decided to pop up in my head and voice his opinion. "You're a little scary sometimes, you know that? Brilliant...but scary." Kekeke. I think the Rupert-voice sums up my thoughts on the brilliance of the lovely insane people. X3;;
Pheonix and Meimi both have sparkly pretty new layouts, even though I still haven't read/watched any Fruits Basket and I'm not familiar with the Kaneshiro Takeshi. ^^; But I love Winter Fall. *_* And evil pretty boy Akio certainly makes nice eye candy. <3
Oh, darn you. Now I'll forever be thinking that Nanba=KimuTaku and KimuTaku=Nanba. Evil. Eeeevil, I say. And I need to show that to Keiko so that we can sparkle and squeal like the fangirls we are over the prettiness of him. <3
kamikaze ~ 10:13 p.m. ::
Wednesday, November 21, 2001
Now Playing: Change the World - V6 [Inuyasha Op 1]
Happy happy way belated birthday to Meimi~! ^^; Nice to see you had such a wonderful birthday! ^_^
Mrrh...I've been wanting to blog more, but this is the first time I've even been on the computer this week, thanks to a certain computer-hogging brother who only gets off to use the restroom. >_o And I think I better finish this, since he's now wondering what I'm doing, and he'll probably start looking over my shoulder anytime now. *grumble*
kamikaze ~ 08:42 a.m. ::
