Monday, November 12, 2001
Now Playing: To Far Away Times - Mitsuda Yasunori [Chrono Trigger]
Ooh, here's an interesting Sorting Hat. I'm a Ravenclaw, as usual. ^_^;
--Maron sighed at 12:48 a.m.
Saturday, November 10, 2001
Now Playing: Ashita wa Motto (Tomorrow I'll Be...) - Takenouchi Sora/Mizutani Yuuko [Digimon 02]
...*drool* I need to watch more than two piddly episodes of Trigun. I need to properly sparkle over this series. I need to properly sparkle over Vash and Onosaka Masaya. And since everyone seems to like him too, I need to properly sparkle over Wolfwood.
*chokes* Snape...doing karaoke...! XD XD XD His robes! They look like bath robes! And the lyrics! *cackle* And speaking of Snape, this pumpkin is so very wrong. XD There's also two very cool fanarts of Snape by Ren at the bottom of the page.
NBC's airing "Harry Potter: Behind the Magic" tomorrow at 7 PM EST, and there's supposed to be behind-the-scenes stuff and interviews with the cast. w00t! XD And someone on the alt.fan.harry-potter newsgroup posted a message listing shows that would feature the actors of the film, since many of them will be in the US next week. I think I might watch them... (This obsession has reached rather frightening proportions. XD;) I'm curious to see how Daniel Radcliffe's voice sounds, now that it's broken. ^^; (For some reason, I never really noticed when my classmates' voices were breaking. ^^;; A shame, not even noticing a part of my life that would have been rather amusing. *nita*) ...I'm a bit relieved to see that I'm just one of many who thinks Radcliffe is surprisingly attractive after seeing the London premiere photos. It's kind of...unnerving. >.>; Ladies in their 20s and 30s were commenting that "he's going to be a hunk," and "he better watch out, because teenage girls will be all over him," and they'll "never last through Prisoner of Azkaban without a
hormone-shock." ^^; And I remember looking at photos from a year ago and thinking that he looked like a cute little boy. Eep. But then again, I can name a number of my male classmates who look the same age or even younger than him, so... *sweatdrop*
Anyway...I had my first appointment with my therapist, Vicki Simmons, last Thursday. Both Mr. Lusby, the counselor at school, and Dr. Gandhi, my psychiatrist, said she's really good. I was still rather nervous about talking to her, but she was really nice, so it was okay. She gave me a tape to listen to with headphones. I have actually listened to it yet...(^^;)...but I think I'll probably listen to it tonight before I go to bed, or tomorrow night. She also gave me a questionnaire at the end so that she could a general idea of my starting point. It had questions like "You feel your mind is clear" and "You feel productive and helpful" and answer choices of "None or little at all," "Some of the time," "Most of the time," and "All of the time." She scored it and told me that I would be in either the "moderate depression" or "marked depression" range. Eek. And that's after taking Effexor for a over a week, and Effexor apparently works really fast. It apparently goes through the system so fast that a person could have flu-like withdrawal systems just from not taking it for a day or two, and it takes a long time to be weaned off of it.
I watched the last hour of Star Wars today on WB. That was fun. XD I would have watched all of it, but I missed the first ninety minutes because I fell asleep for a few hours after watching Saturday morning cartoons... Mom was telling me that she remembered that when it first came out, everyone thought Harrison Ford was cute, handsome, sexy, etc. ^_^;
I was going to go watch Monsters Inc. with my dad today, but first I was too tired, and then he was too tired. ^^;; Ah well, there'll be other oppurtunities. I did get to go to the library for a while (yeah, it sounds so boring compared to you going to Renfest XD;) because my mom wanted to return a book and check-out one of her brain-rot romance books. Something by Linda Howard...I think it was called Open Season. She mostly reads plot-less romance books so she can relax and bore herself to sleep, but I think she's really into Linda Howard books, and was really happy that the book was finally available. ^_^; I kinda just wandered around randomly for a while. I was kinda hoping they'd have the Harry Potter school books, but alas, it was not so. I strongly considered borrowing the HP sound recordings, but I decided not to in the end...for some reason. I don't know. ^^; I ended up at the magazine section reading random HP articles. XD;
Eee...I don't know how it came up (because I was lying down and nearly falling asleep), but Mom told me about when she went to watch Soylent Green at the theaters (she went to watch it because Charlton Heston was her favorite actor at the time). She says she came out of the theater feeling like she was going to retch. I'll wonder if I ought to watch it someday. Though on the other hand, the Soylent facilities in Xenogears were quite enough, thank you very much. >_>
I am 52% blogaholic. Same as both My-chan and Talya-san. Though I'm sure that if I knew of some internet cafe nearby, and I could fast-forward time eight months, it'd be eight points higher. ^_~; "You are a dedicated weblogger. You post frequently because you enjoy weblogging a lot, yet you still manage to have a social life. You're the best kind of weblogger. Way to go!" *niko*
5 1/2 days till Harry Potter! I hope I can persuade Mom to go watch it on the 16th. Oh yes, I also suffered through 20 minutes of some WB sitcom called Reba so I could see (and record) a sneak-peek preview of the movie. It was the part at Ollivander's wand shop. It was nifty. And Ollivander was appropriately neurotic. XD
--Maron sighed at 11:00 p.m.
Friday, November 9, 2001
Now Playing: Kuroi Tsubasa (Black Wings) - The Brilliant Green
Mmmmm...artificially flavored squishy candy~ I love Laffy Taffy. XD;
--Maron sighed at 01:55 p.m.
Thursday, November 8, 2001
Now Playing: Coppelia no Hitsugi (Coppelia's Coffin) - Ali Project [Noir Op]
*squeals* So many updated fanfics I want to read at The Sugar Quill! I don't know where to start~! *goes off to sparkle in fanfic bliss*
--Maron sighed at 11:11 p.m.
Thursday, November 8, 2001
Now Playing: Flame of Love - Sweet Velvet
Ooooh~<3 I just read the last chapter of Time Stranger Kyoko~<3 (Thank you Meimi-san~<3) *melts* I think I'll just sit here and bask in the warm and fuzzy feelings for a while. <3
--Maron sighed at 10:35 p.m.
Tuesday, November 6, 2001
Now Playing: Toki ni Ai wa (At Times, Love Is) - Masami Okui [Utena movie]
*_* Everyone should have this song! I shall have to get the sheet music for the Utena movie someday. I think Sasuga has it... I want to watch the Utena TV series. _o_ Heck, it might even help me understand that crack movie. But then again, maybe not. >__> I first watched the movie a few days after the spinal tap back at the end of May...it did not do much for my headache.
Wiriya: *walks in sleepily during the end credits* Time for me to watch it now! <3
Vinita: Augh! No! It makes my brain huuurt!
And yet I watched it again anyway. ^^; Himemiya Anthy and Akio Scare Me too, My-chan. ^^;; Cindy, I shall have to loan you the Utena movie to you someday (as soon as Meli gives it back! T_T), so that you too can fear Anthy and Akio. Glen doesn't hold a candle to the Himemiyas in terms of freakiness. (Actually, I wasn't really freaked out by Glen. Just...surprised. You and Tim on the other hand... >D)
Social blogging! Though I've probably already forgotten half of what I wanted to say at this point...^^;;;
My-chan, I like your new layout! (though I still have yet to see the AL anime or manga...) Shirahime always makes me think of Yuki-onna. Ne, what kind of doctor are you planning on being? Just curious. ^^ Maa...I don't think I could ever be a doctor myself...I'm probably too squeamish, I get sick too often as is, and I constantly hear my parents complaining about their jobs. ^^;; I wish I knew what heck I want to do with my life. _o_
Phoenix-san, I promise I'll send the translations soon. I've been meaning to fix the formatting for some time now, but I just didn't have the motivation to do so till now. That's me, the procrastinating perfectionist. ^^;; Bowling to Change the World? I want to see that. XD Isn't Rupan-sensei wonderful? XD XD XD I think the actual katakana for his name was Rupin/Lupin, but Rupan just sounds so much more fun. X3
Meimi-san, I hope you get better soon. And good luck with your tests and the play! *hugs*
Hi Janaki-san! *waves* Thanks for the layout compliment! ^^ I want to change it very soon though...it's been up entirely too long... I think I'll try to do an HP layout before the movie comes out. Maybe a Snape/Alan Rickman one. Good eyecandy, he is. XD I love how his clothes just seem to blend together to make one big mass of black. It looks nifty. XD; I have that neat HP page bookmarked somewhere. It was actually one of the factors that pushed me to read the books. Dorkiness is cool. XD
....I always forget half the things I want to say. Ah well. ^^;
10 days till the Harry Potter movie! XD
--Maron sighed at 09:20 p.m.
Saturday, November 3, 2001
Now Playing: Beauty & the Beast - Celine Dion & Peabo Bryson
*sigh* Blackouts are annoying. XO
Anyway. Mom's drunk. XD;; She's been feeling much better. The main thing that was making her depressed and worried was that she was afraid Ms. Shivers, the vice principle at school, didn't really understand my situation. But she sent in a folder full of papers about everything yesterday afternoon, so she's very relieved and much happier now. She says a good sign that she's not depressed anymore is that she can enjoy her trashy romance books again. ^_^; She's still having some problems sleeping though, and she wanted to try getting some sleep without sleeping pills, so...she got drunk. ^^;; I was in the laundry room, and when I walked out, I smelled a *very* strong scent, but it didn't completely hit me at the time what it was. But then I saw her walking around in the living room with a shot glass, and...well, I was pretty shocked, as I've never seen her drink alcohol...and now I know why. She gets drunk veeery easily, and normally only drinks alcohol for medicinal purposes. Just one shot of cognac, which was 40% alcohol, and she was swaying a bit and generally acting pretty funny. ^^;;; She was telling me about how she got drunk (and had an awful hangover the next morning, broke down, and called her boss and told him she couldn't work anymore) on half a bottle of bad wine when she was 8 1/2 months pregnant with Nont because she was completely exhausted but couldn't sleep. Nont was an extremely hyperactive baby - constantly kicking and punching and moving around. But he was veeery quiet that day. XD; Yeah, I find it hilarious that Nont got stone drunk for the first time when he was only 8 1/2 months old; no wonder he's so messed up (okay, so he was crazy and hyperactive before that, but still...). Ah well, Mom doesn't seem to worry much about, since that was the only time she drank alcohol when she was pregnant. She pushed me out of her room soon after that because she didn't want me to see her drunk. ^^;; I check in on her a little while ago; I'm not sure if she's asleep (I hope she is), but her room still smells strongly of alcohol. ^^;
I think those happy pills are really starting to take effect. I'm still pretty down sometimes, but it seems like it's easier for me to be in good spirits lately. Being constantly tired is really no fun at all though. Mom says that since I don't exactly match the criteria for chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS), what I have is called (post-infectious, from the encephalitis) idiopathic chronic fatigue. She gave me (and Ms. Shivers) a printout from emedicine.com of a short, concise report on CFS. They call it "poorly understood." No kidding. ~_~; I've seen a total of seven doctors (@_@) since I first got encephalitis at the beginning of April, and we're just now figuring out that this is one of my medical problems. It got a lot worse after I had bronchitis back at the end of September though...before, it was just that I got tired more easily, had difficulty concentrating, and recurring headaches. Now there's more to it... Aaaah...I really hope this doesn't last a terribly long time.
Eh...well, I was going to do some social blogging, but I think I better go take a nap. *yawn*
--Maron sighed at 06:36 p.m.
Thursday, November 1, 2001
Now Playing: Velvet Underworld - Weiß
Aaaaargh. I need to stop looking at Yahoo! Japan auctions. Because I'm just torturing myself by looking at them. Why, oh why can I not be fluent and literate in Japanese? I want to be like Keiko and be spoiled endlessly by a Japanese grandmother. *pout* I want those Harry Potter doujinshi so badly. There's even one by the artist of the Love Wolf site. *dies*
--Maron sighed at 11:55 p.m.
Wednesday, October 31, 2001
Now Playing: Hitoribocchi no Seesaw - Kazama Yuuto [Digimon 02]
*leer* I finally found this song here. Nice and soothing. I need nice and soothing music to listen to. Kazama Yuuto needs to sing more. There should have been a Yamato-only CD. XD I also finally found the Catch You Catch Me Remix too. I should have been cackling over it but...it was just too genki for my current state of mind, and it ended up just...irritating me. ~_~ *sigh*
Anyway, things haven't been too bad the past few days. No suicidal thoughts, at least. And I'm actually getting an allowance now! I was really shocked...I thought my mom was joking at first, and when I realized she wasn't, I sat there gaping at her. ^^;;; My parents are usually pretty stingy when it comes to buying us unnecessary things (though they're rather loose when it comes to things like junk food...Pocky! XD) - they'd rather just put money in stocks and bank accounts to save up for college. They usually give the Evil Eye when I ask for things that are over $5-$10 (depending on their mood ^^;). My sis had to push me to ask for the second and third Harry Potter books (the third one came out in paperback not too long ago). My mom frowned a bit disapprovingly because she didn't want me to spend my time reading them when I ought to do homework, but she bought them anyway. So it's all good. XD Anyway, now I feel rather spoiled. I don't remember what we were talking about, but I sulked and pointed out that "at least Nont had an allowance" (not the first time I've done this...^^;). And then she just sat up straight and asked if I wanted allowance, like it was no big deal. o_O; She even asked me how much I wanted (I sat and gaped and mumbled that I didn't know). And now I have a $40 per month allowance (same as Meli - she asked me how much my friends get). That's $480 a year. And if this goes on until I go to college, that'll be 22 months' worth...$880 total. I feel so spoiled. ^^; And I've already spent most of the $40 I got a couple days ago. I was feeling giddy and I was browsing Ebay and I saw the entire 44 episode KKJ series subtitled for only $30 (the Buy It Now price was the same as the starting auction price! *niko-niko-niko*)... and I caved in. I didn't even like the first four episodes of the anime that much, but I still want to see it, and I heard it finally picks up halfway through the series, and it was so cheap compared to how much I usually see it go for. Only $5 shipping too! Well, it's not that I'm flat broke now or anything...I think I still have about $60 saved up from money left over that my parents gave me for things like gasoline and food. Hey, if they don't ask for the change, no need to tell them, deshou? ^_~
I had my appointment with Dr. Gandhi, the psychiatrist, on Monday. I didn't actually get to talk to her alone very long (about 5-10 minutes) since we needed to get other things out of the way first (like my medical history, physical health, home-schooling, the court case, and all that), but she seems nice and sympathetic. She also prescribed an anti-depressant for me - Effexor. It's only my second day on it, so I don't think it's really begun to take effect yet. She thinks it's likely that I'm having post-encephalitis depression, and that the chemicals in my brain are still messed up from that. And even if I'm not depressed, Effexor ought to help return things to normal. It's too bad the only counselors she could refer us to were too far away. So my mom got some referrals from the school counselor, Mr. Lusby, instead. *sigh* I'd rather have had a counselor recommended by Dr. Gandhi than one by Mr. Lusby. Ah well... I hope whichever counselor we go to first is okay and that we don't have to jump around between counselors like I did with my doctors a while ago. >_o My follow-up appointment with Dr. Gandhi is next Monday...
Dammit dammit dammit. Stupid stupid STUPID kids. Can they not see that LIGHTS OFF means NO CANDY?! I even left all the freaking lights off so they'd think no one was home! I normally don't mind giving out candy, and some of those little kids are rather cute (even if a lot of the older ones are rather obnoxious...they do not need to ring the doorbell five times to get our attention), but NOT TONIGHT. I will be severely pissed if it turns out that they woke up my mom because she's been depressed too and suffers from insomnia when she's very stressed or depressed and has only had a few hours of sleep during the past FOUR DAYS. She got some sleeping pills back in July because she was stressed from my grandparents being very sick and on the verge of death. She spent her entire "vacation" in Thailand back in June nursing them back to health because the medical care isn't nearly as good there as it is here, and the doctors taking care of my grandparents didn't know what the hell they were doing, and my mom had to constantly tell them what to do. Argh. Anyway, the doctor who prescribed the sleeping pills told her not to take them too often, and she hasn't. Today was only the 17th pill in nearly four months, but my dad made her all paranoid by telling her she needed to stop because she'd get addicted. Honestly. She was a bit scared because they used to make her sleep in fifteen minutes, but it's been taking longer lately. But her boss from work called her today to check in on her (she's taken a two week emergency vacation) and told her that it was definately okay for her to take one and get some rest, thank goodness. I checked in on her a while after she took the sleeping pill, and I'm pretty sure it worked. I just hope that those idiot kids didn't wake her up. >_< We disconnected the phone lines in her room and the room closest to hers, and I'm sitting here with the phone right in front of me so I can answer it right away if it rings so it won't wake her up, and then these kids just...argh.
Actually...I think I've been more depressed about my mom than myself right now. Dr. Mancias, my neurologist, thought it was likely that I got post-vaccination encephalitis. And it was my mom who gave me the hepatitis A vaccination shot because my grandfather wanted to see me over the summer before he dies (I've never met my grandparents before...), so she feels horribly guilty. She started crying when she was explaining that to Dr. Gandhi, and I just felt so awful. I know she's been feeling like she's been feeling like she hasn't been a good enough mother because her communication skills aren't very good...but I had no idea she blamed this whole bout of sickness for that past seven months on herself. God, it's just awful. She feels guilty and depressed that this is all her fault when it's not. Nobody blames her for this. My parents may be clueless and bumbling, but they mean well and love my siblings and I. And I'm feeling guilty that she's so depressed and stressed and has hardly been able to sleep because of my situation. It's times like this when I really wish Wiriya was around the house. We need someone here that isn't depressed. It's just not healthy for either of us. My dad helps sometimes, but he often infuriates and exasperates the both of us. >_> Nont would upset me and probably make me cry every other day like he usually does when he visits. He apologized through a pretty lengthy email for being a jerk last Friday, but I still won't forget how insensitive and obnoxious he was when I had the extremely painful spinal headache back at the end of May. And I think Nick would feel rather awkward. ^^; But I think it really would help to have Wiriya around. She's rather comforting to be around and always cheers me up when she comes home. *sigh*
Ugh...I better stop. I'm depressing myself. I went to the school orchestra concert last night. That was rather fun and cheered me up quite a bit. It's so much more pleasant when I don't have to play myself. *niko* Though I kinda wonder how many people know I'm being home-schooled. ^^;; My mom didn't turn in the papers until yesterday because she wanted Dr. Gandhi's input first, and it seems that my teachers don't know yet (except for Mrs. Vandiver - I asked her about what I should do for orchestra, and she told me I ought to just drop it for now, since I'd have to do paperwork to make up for the grades). And when Nat saw me, he said, "What? You're not well enough to go to school, but you're well enough to come watch us?" >_> Honestly. Mrs. Vandiver would have my hide if I just came to watch the concert while not attending her class. No logic at all. So if Nat was thinking that, I wonder what all the people who don't know about me being home-schooled are thinking. Ah well, doesn't matter. ^^;
Katie was...very excited to see me. She jumped up and down and asked how I was doing in a very genki way. ^^;; And Cindy apparently has very good tunnel vision. I was talking to Keiko in the aisles in the auditorium, and she zoomed right past me, stood right smack in front of me, and started talking to Keiko. I said her name to get her attention...no response. I whacked her on the back...no response. Keiko pointed at me and I screamed her name. Cindy: "HUH?!" *turns around* "VINITA!!!" Gotta work on those sensory skills, Cindy. ^_~
Tormenting Heath about being concertmaster was rather fun. >D Many people stopped by me and asked, "Hey, Vinita. Did you know Heath is concert master? *nita nita*" ^^; While we were watching the top orchestra play (It was rather odd, watching them when I would normally be up there... And it sounds different and a bit better when you're down there in the auditorium where all the mistakes seem so much less obvious. Of course, I knew where the worst spots were from having to suffer through playing it, but...^^;), Heath kinda moaned and said something along the lines "I messed up..." And I told him, "Yeah, I noticed! <3" "Aaaaah! You did?!" And he got a bit panicky and said he hoped that no one else noticed. It's so much fun to torment Heath. >D When he and Nat were sitting behind me while we were watching the middle schools, they were shoving some sheet music back and forth, both of them acting like it wasn't theirs. I didn't know whether to be amused or exasperated. So when Nat shoved it at me, I took it, calmly crumpled it up into a ball (Cindy and Keiko found this pretty amusing, and Nat made kind of this..."Aaaah!! How could you do that?!" sound. *cackle*) and threw it behind me without looking. It hit Heath's chest, and he gave this "Hey! Why me?!" look. Yeah, it wasn't exactly the most mature of things to do, but I think Cindy and Keiko would agree that it was worth it for their reactions. >D
And someone needs to tell our hopeless co-president Ryan that people normally adjust the microphone so that they don't have to bend over a foot. And it doesn't look very professional to walk on stage to announce something with your shoulders slouched and hands in pockets. *sigh* Keiko was telling me that if she was Kelly, the only reason she would have asked him to be co-president was for his (annoying, shrill,) attention-drawing whistle. *sweatdrop*
Aaaand~ (Is this post ever going to end?) Meli bought me this postively gigantic (about 13x20 inches when it's folded) "get well" card over the weekend. It's rather cute. ^-^ I don't know how it got passed around, but most of my friends signed it, along with a few others. Some of the more...interesting...parts of what people said XD:
Sarah: You're not missing anything interesting - school's as boring as ever! (heh)
Cindy: And who am I going to rant and rave about anime with?? (*pat pats* Poor, poor deprived Cindy. ^_-)
Heath: Please don't ignore me on AIM. (How can I ignore him when I don't even see him?! >.>)
Ritika, ever stating the obvious: This is a huge card.
Melanie: I hope your immune system starts working again! You better get better so you will be able to have some kind of social life. (Oy! My immune system is most certainly not dead!)
Katie: Please get better soon & don't have too much fun at home!
Ryan: They told me to say something so... Get well soon!! (>_>;)
Tim: Yo Vinita! Get back soon cause you need to see the rest of Cowboy Bebop! (XD)
Hmmm...all the people up there I just quoted are orchestra people. Nya. I love this card. <3
Pheonix-san, glad to see that you've finally gotten to the sparkliness that is Prisoner of Azkaban and Sirius and Remus! XDDD Hmmm...I completely forgot that there'd be kids running around in Harry Potter costumes. Ah well...^^; Anyway, this is might be kinda late, but if you haven't found the KKJ translations yet (they used to be at Checkmate! but that's down now for a revamp), I've got them on my hard drive, so I can email them to you if you'd like. ^_^ Yeees~ Be sucked into the sheer sparkliness of the KKJ manga~ XD
*giggle*
Google: Harry Potter Rupin
I thought this was really amusing, and then I did a double take. I didn't remember ever typing "Rupin" instead of "Lupin" here. But I did, and I didn't even realize it. ^_^;;
Um. I think that's it. ^^;;;;; Happy Halloween everyone!
--Maron sighed at 07:36 p.m.
