7-11-02 9:37 p.m.
I'm not very happy as of right now...o_o i finally got the fucking games i've been waiting weeks to get...and i can't play them cause my sister is wanting to watch tv..and it's the only tv in the house compatible with my PS One...x_x' bitch. She has two friends over...oO and she can't quit arguing with them...it's pissing me off so fucking bad. Now Chels is sitting here yelling at my parents...about being bored and stuff. Saying that people hate the stuff she likes and she refuses to change.. GO SIS! x_x i taught her to be an individual. oO; oh well...i got syphon filter one and two. Oo Syphon Filter 3 was like 40 dollars...they can keep the game for that.. i intended on purchasing Syphon Filter 1 and Resident Evil...oO but the store no carried it. The cashier didn't charge me properly and i got 5 dollars back ^^ well mist is on so imma go bai!

7-10-02 6:35 p.m.
oO god damn you! >< im pissed so pissed...me and rose got in a huge fight...i blocked her on everything i had her on. The argument involved a lot of talk about what people thought of us behind our backs and what we really thought of each other and shit..i got a little upset so i got to the kitchen grabbed a seraded knife...and got to work..oO;; oh well...it works... bye...

7-10-02 2:20 p.m.
Oo...i feel weird....x_x' the library assistant i wrote about in my previous entries has began to hit on me when i go up there. oO...she's a year older than me i think? Oo..kinda weird...she was complaining about me coming in just as she was always going off to lunch. Oo...interesting maybe i plan that eh? oO dun tell mist she wouldn't be to hoppy x_x'...Rose is confusing me so badly. Today i went to apologize to her...oO and she got all bitchy about it. hmm i won't make that mistake again. Oo...i think she's the reason for the sadness i'm feeling. oO but that can be over came relatively easily. Jeremy is obsessed with Resident Evil. Not my brother jeremy but some kid i know over the compy. He's pretty cool...sometimes..x_x...I've been listening to some CD's i haven't listened to in a while...like Linkin Park and Vanessa Carlton..and hell even Michelle Branch...currently i'm listening to Vanessa Carlton. oO;; haha i got meggers addicted to Michelle Branch XD. oO HOLY SHIT! My brother just called...oo...hes gonna buy me a cd burner. FUCK YEAH! XD! Gotta love my family...oO...well more later bye

7-9-02 7:28 p.m
Well after getting up for a while and doing somethings i felt pretty good. I made a new layout for the rpg..so at least i got one thing accomplished. I'm worried about Rose...i mean i know its over between me and her but still shes a close friend of mine and i couldn't take it if anything happened to her..like how Shaun is with Asher. Hmm..too much to keep on my mind at one time. oO... Dad's worrying me lately...im scared hes gonna work himself to death..today he went out and mowed 4 yards in hundred degree weather. I couldnt picture having to live without a father like Meggers does...i dun think i could take it. God im worrying myself to much. Yes.. i tend to think of things that are really far fetched and hard to keep in mind. I guess that just comes with being me though. I mean i've thought of death so many times...and ive thought of losing friends and family...its so hard just to think about. I mean even if megan and shaun arent on speaking terms with me right now...I stil consider them both friends...i would hate if anything happened to either of them... damn im just hurting myself by thinking of this stuff. Okay...well i guess i've said enough...for now maybe more later...bai

7-9-02 7:28 p.m

7-9-02 12:39 p.m.
Well i swear i have a very boring life. oO... I got up this morning to find the parentals were already up and watching the TV. oO thats bout all they ever do. Well after i got up and got dressed and such i went over to the neighbors to help them get a mower started...oO;; Then the step mother got called into work...and the sister went to a friends house...then the dad went out to work. Oo;;; so im here all by my lonesome listening to my Hikaru CD. Well i read Asher's pita and i feel bad cause she was alone last night. Oo i wish i had been on to keep her company. Well im off to talk to Mist and shtuff oO;

7-8-02 6:09 p.m.
Oo damn 5 days without a sing entry oO;;; well looks like im in for some typing eh? Alright first off we'll start with the fourth of July. Well i thought it was gonna be pretty boring...but damn we had a ton of bbq...then we were standing outside and my step mom brings out this box of fireworks so me and dad start throwing fireworks into the smoker. XD it was funny. Oo then later on that day we went to the outskirts of town and bought some 80 dollars worth of fireworks. Oo i nearly shot my step mom in the ankle with a roman candle! XD!!! The thing shot when i wasnt expecting it to so i dropped it. Oo it just ended up pointing in her general direction XD...oO okay on to the 5th. My step mom was at work...oO den she went up to a fence and a dog bited her oO......first time in my life i had ever seen live bone. oO it was actually pretty cool. oo;; well we were out till like uhhhh 3:30 that night? Oo well not much has happened since then..oO;; cept i have been doing a lot of voice chatting on AIM. I sang for Rose over it and i guess she thought it was pretty good. How come everyone other than me thinks i sing well? Oo makes no sense to me. Well mesa is gonna go talk to mist for a wittle bit now baiiiii baiiii ^^

7-3-02 12:31 p.m.
o_O wellllllll okay. o_o last night me and my dad went golfing. IT WAS SO GREAT! >< i'm not too good at golf...o_O buuut i like driving the cart XD...i nearly threw my dad out of the thing what like errr 5 times on 9 holes? o_O he would like get in the cart and hold on for dear life. I didnt have any idea thatthose little things had that much speed behind them it was sooo cool. >< o_O id pay the 5 dollars just to drive the cart around the course XD!!! o_o' tokyo niiights O_o hikaru song its pretty cool but not as cool as sakura drops. o_o' *listens to sakura drops again. o_o im in a strange mood today...o_o verrrry strange. wooooooo >

7-2-02 11:39 a.m. O_o;
o_o''' sugar fix finally wore off...resulting in biiiig ass headache for jerry last night. BUT I HAD SO MUCH FUN! O-o we went to Golden Corral...o_o'' lmfao...my sister said something about my dad being a monkey butt? o_O and this waiter laughed his ass off...it was so fucking funny...o_o then i kept pestering my sisters lil friend. o_o i was soo fucking hyper last night...we had a loooot of fun. x_X then we went to wal mart. WOOO! >< that was the coolest...o_o my dad and i were walking down an aisle and he was talking to me...and i quickly ducked back behind a shoe display...he kept walking and kept talking...he got some funny ass looks then he realized i wasnt there. then he started looking around and there i was walking way behind him, it was so fucking funny. o_o well i failed to talk about this yesterday...o_O shaun talked to me for a while yesterday. It wasnt anger or anything like that...for the first time in a while. He just told me quite simply megan didnt want to talk to me...i apologized for everything i had done...then what made my day o_O as weird as this fucking sounds coming from my mouth....i asked if there was a chance that we could be friends again..he said possibly we'd just have to see what happened. O_o dooont ask me...o_o something about that convo gave me a new respect for that boy...o_o like i saw something in him i hadn't seen before...it was.....strange. o_o i'll put it at this and leave it from there...i now understand why megan likes him soooo much...and they both so deserve each other. >< and i cant believe i was fucking foolish enough to try to come between them so many times. i apologize sooo deeply to both of them...-.- well that does it for this entry maybe another later o_O depending on how boring today is.

7-1-02 7:17 p.m.
*high fives mist and sticks his tongue out at mel and rose* SUGAR IS GOD! o_O im fucking hyper as hell iwas even dancing. o_o; i dont dance good so i dont dance often. fwahahahaha. o_O! MY CD CAME IN TODAY FUCKING HELL YA! >*drinks a cherry coke* nyyyyahahahahha O_o sugar is the shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. WOOOOOOOOO! well BAI BAI!

6-30-02 8:48 p.m.
-.- mesa depressed again. I was sooo happy earlier...then i thought of how he restrains our friendship...it pisses me off sooo bad...and then...it makes me really upset...-.-' she tells me its not restrained...if its not restrained then why do we only talk on aim and she has me blocked on msn....? makes no sense to me...i want rose...back soo bad...but..o_o now shes my rp sister? x_X''''''''''

6-30-02 5:24 p.m.
o_o neeeeew layout XD its got assuuuuukkkkaa on it. o_o red is prettyful. Well lets get on to today's events k? Well first off i wake up and get dressed for breakfast...(way to get up early on a sunday x.x') Well when my uncle and grandpa pull up they have my future aunt in the car wif them, i was thinking....ohh shit.. cause last time it didnt go very well...well when i get in...grandpa hands me this letter from mom o_o i knew he would have it...but i really didnt wanna read it...it got me upset and stuff...o_O i was quiet till we got to the restaurant. Then my older sister tells me they need me to be bus boy up there...sooo i decide well what the hell 6 dollars and hour for cleaning tables. I will work saturdays and sundays 7-2...o_o fun fun. well sherry(future aunt) tells me some things i already knew...o_O she thinks she knows more about my family than i do...gooooood luck chick. Well things are going okay now...so ill just end this entry...oh yeah! that letter had me crying...twice...o_o' and the music im listening to isnt helping it in the slightest....

6-28-02 6:01 p.m.
HAHAHAHAHA! its not worht my time anymore...il just block em both and enjoy the other friends i have XP its not worth me getting upset anymore soooo time to learn to enjoy life wifout them ^^

6-28-02 5:24 p.m.
I swear i can't be happy for shyt anymore. I cant talk to someone because...he has her like...restricted? is that the word that should be used. I dont wanna say anything to offend her...in case she didn't block me like he has. He shouldn't be able to control her like that...he doesn't understand...perhaps he never will...i would so like to make things right with him again but he wont let that happen...its got me so upset... Well i made a new layout...i've been using a lot of black in my layouts lately...kinda reflects my moods over the past few months. yeah oh well....bye