I dont feel well at all...sinuses are killing me, and all the family wants to do is go all over the fucking town...o_o I feel really bad(not from the sickness)I miss talking to meggers, i havent gotten to talk to her in like 2 days..yeah i knows sounds stupid, but we dont usually go this long wifout some kinda communication. I really need to talk to her. I havent written in my personal notebook thingy in nearly 4 days...O-o i havent had the time. Meggers forgot someones voice, and i know who it is, im not gonna put it in here for her privacy purposes. O_o i hope i get to talk to her today. Shaun said something last night about needing to talk to me, but i was away and when i got back, he was offline. o_o i swear i miss everything. Well Bai...

o_O I have relatives down from Michigan. O_o were going out to dinner tonight, and im not really even hungry. Yeah i went out and saw spider man last night it was a great movie, cept mary jane only calls peter, Tiger once and in the series she calls him that allllll the time. Yeah well i might add more later. BAI

Yesterday was great i mean fantastic. It has been a very long time since i had a day that fun. Fifth hour we didnt do anything but show off our Corel presentations (i'd rather use powerpoint). Well that was okay theeen comes 6th hour...IT WAS THE FUNNEST CLASS PERIOD I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!We ate and stuff and i even got to sign yearbooks(i dont get to do that often im "the silent kid") and and and at the end WE GOT SILLY STRINGED. IT WAS GREAT! Well that set me on the pace for the whooole day i mean noone could have possibly pissed me off yesterday no matter how hard they tried. Rose and I looked at breaking up, and i was still in a great mood. I wouldnt have traded yesterday for anything in the world. o_o...now enough happiness. On to today thus far. Im sitting in 4th hour bored off my ass. o_O... I had a semester exam 2nd hour which was easy. O-o THEN last hour, i just sat and read for the entire hour and half...o_o I nearly finished a 400 page book. So yeah today has been rather boring. I have an aunt coming in from Michigan tonight, i can't wait to see how that goes (sarcasm) Im a little nervous about it....o_o...Shes not gonna like me, cause i dun talk much around people not even my family. I really couldn't care less what she thinks of me, its the same principle i have for other people, you dont accept me for me, there other people who will, so who needs to waste their time with the ones who dont like the way you are. Well basically what that means is if you dont like me for who i am, there are others who will and i dont need to waste my time with you. Not necessarily the of this entry, but people in general eh? o_o.....Im sitting here singing...and people are actually listening and not telling me to shut up. O_o...does that mean i have a decent voice. Yeah teacher over shoulder o_o...bai bai now.

Yeah im in fifth hour right now...still reflecting on last night. Well heres what happened. Me and Megan were playing around megan started singing a goofy little song to me cause i was depressed about Rose leaving me she sang *ill be you little munkah if it will make you smile* Then i was just goofing around and i said MEGAN GET OUT OF MY PANTS! then she said JERRY! GET YOUR HAND OUT OF MY SHIRT! O_o...yeah innocent fun we were laughing -n- such then shaun catches wind of it and all hell breaks loose. o_o.....Yeah then i decided yeah tell Rose about it cause at the time we had gotten back together. Rose doesn't easily over react to things...o_o she broke up wif me again....o_o! Well Megan later comes to me telling me about shaun talkin shyt about her dad...NOONE DOES THAT TO MEGGERS! I got on shaun's case soo fast! Then o_o suddenly after yelling fer like 30 minutes hes calm and tells me "jerry bye, and i am sorry." O_o i was like wtf...Then later after everyone has gone namely Megan...o_o Shaun comes on and he is all talking about "I Burned one of my arms all to hell" Well yeah i repeatedly stabbed myself with a straightpin getting blood all over a certain object that if my parents discover, they wil violently murder me. Yeah then later this time without anyone's help me and rose carefully rebuilt our relationship, but shaun is worried about megan hating him cause he said she told him straight out "Shaun I hate you". O_o...What a tangled web we weave eh? uhh yeah Bai..

Well today was pretty decent, cept i found out that my english test is gonna be a son of a bitch...dont have that many semester tests...so im happy about that. Well when i get home nothing at all happens..till i get online...me and rose start fighting nearly right away i accused her of cheating on me, then she accused me of cheating on her with MEGAN! MEGAN OF ALL PEOPLE! Well it just so happened that shaun was online at the time.. O_o boy did i ever prove her wrong. I invited shaun to the convo...he really helped us, if it werent for him me and rose wouldnt be together right now. I am soo happy that me and him are talking again...i would much rather be his friend than his enemy Well thats all i have fer now..but i might write more later. BAI!

Yeah i got out of school and got home...yeah i wish i hadn't. When i got in the van everything seemed just fine...then we go and take care of some business, yeah once again everythings fine. o_o then when we get done taking care of that me and dad go out and mow a lawn. When we get done, we go out and eat dinner just me dad and the EVIL stepmom. Im only refering to her as that cause she pissed me off after dinner. more on that momentarily. While at the restaurant, i help some little kids with their math homework...THEN the step mom starts in on the ride home. She thinks she knows everything....at one point i made up a totally fake fact and she was like "yeah i know about that" she tell me that i think i know everything, i speak only what i know, and if i dont know it, i admit it and learn more about it. I TOTALLY HATE WHEN PEOPLE GET LIKE THAT! Well after that argument, which is still going on, just a little quieter... i just tried to clear up a friendship...it was a complete waste of my time...so i made an ass of myself and well im used to it...noone cares what i have to say anymore....yeah soo well bai.......

uhh yeah...Im in 6th hour newspaper...using an imac !! MUST KILL!!! O_o....im okay now...Well i stil have two classes to go and i dunno if i can take them no more........... I AM SOOOO READY FER SUMMER BREAK! we arent even going to be doing anything in any of my classes and we still have another week of school. I just dont get school any more. It seriously makes me wonder who the hell decided to come up with the idea and why the fuck they did so.....Well at least this class is pretty cool i mean noone really bothers me and theres a couple of kids that even talk to me! WOW! o_o someone actually talks to me, their might just be a god after all, but i doubt it. Well im gonna get off here and yeah get ready fer my next class which begins in 10 minutes.

Well i just got back from eating dinner with my dad...interesting evening i must say. We got to the resturant and well theres this video game...i have a MAJOR fetish for this type of game..u know the ones that are like upgraded galaga games. Well after a spent 5 bucks on the game i went and sat down to spend "quality time" with my dad..all he did was sit there and bitch about how he thinks my step mom is cheating on him. My dad is not one to get into intellectual conversations. He doesn't like to talk about emotions and such so i knew it was a waste of time to even sit beside him. HE just sat there bitching the WHOLE time........I asked if he was ready to go while he was holding a slice of pizza in his hand and he practically killed me. I think hes half drunk. He really pissed me off tonight but if i tell him that hell get all defensive like "well its all your fault"...dah di dah DAH! He doesnt think he can be at fault for anything. Some day hell see the truth, that he is not perfect, and that his health in fact isnt the worlds best. He works himself to death and doesn't even care. One day im gonna get one of those calls telling me that he has passed away or whatever. It worries me, i just wish he would simply slow down his lifestyle. I cant talk to him about shit without him saying "I'm not doing this or you arent gonna do this" It make me SOOOOO PISSED! Well i vented out some anger depression and worry, sooo BAI! ^__^

Well today was boring i got to catch the end of my show though SUSPENSE WAS KILLING ME!!!!!! Well i got involved in an argument with shaun today yet again...i really didnt want an enemy made out of him, but sometimes we are both to stubborn for our own good. I mean i we try to be friends, but everytime we get close, something happens and we end up in an argument of some sort. I HATE IT i mean hes like one of the nicest people i know up until something happens like i said and we end up arguing, then all hell breaks loose. I wish that for once we could just be friends without the damn arguing every time something turns bad. I want to talk to him, to try to make friends one last time, but im scared...it seems like when i apologize he tries to put all the arguing off on me we both do our fair share in it there shouldnt be any more blame on one person than the other. And if he reads this, i just want him to know that i am really sorry, and that it shouldnt take a lot of considering, if he is willing to well get along as dumb as that sounds. bai fer now.........

Well today i went back to school, and BIG surprise, nooooo make up work. It scared me shitless. I have soo much work to do so that i can get all my credits for sophomore year. Im gonna be in such deep shit if i fail that it wont even be funny. The little sister is gone for the night and well its just me and dad if that tells you anything, were just gonna sit here and watch tv without the slightest bit of conversation which works out great for me because well he isnt that great of a conversationalist. Now im just waiting for the night to end. Have you ever wondered what you were put on the earth to do. I feel that everyone was put her for a specific reason, and they will either learn early in life what they are meant for or late in life when its too late for them to fulfill the destinies lined out for them. Im still not clear on what i was put here for, i just kinda drift on thin ice all of life. I mean, i will hopefully figure out what i am meant for, but i wish i knew right now it would make things soo much easier. I know little kids that already set the path for their future, and it scares me because well it just does...i dont have a reason, it just seriously scares me. im thinking of gettin off the comp and going to meditate maybe i can uncover the truth behind my existence, the me that everyone needs to know, my future...

Well this makes the third day in a row that i didnt go to school. I was diagnosed with gastroenteritis, and was tested for diabetes, the doctor told me that i might have something wrong with my tonsils cause they are swolen and such. I was prescribed three antibiotics and stuff. Tommorow i get to go back to school OH BOY! Three days worth of make up work. Please kill me now... O_o... My stomachs really uneasy right now, and i was also told that i have a chance for asthma and next time i start weezing to come in to the doctors office ASAP so they could hear it and diagnose it. Im gonna shut up for now, except that well those singer wanna bes started causing problems with my grandparents and the singers got kicked out of their house, they got what they deserved for fucking with me and my family. I better not ever here from them again.

Well today i woke up sick and stayed home..The only thing keeping me from puking now is me being soo hyper. O_o... Well after getting up and moving around for a little while, some people my parents know came over, one of which is a rising country star. They had me wire a cd burner into the comp and now they spent all day trying to get it to work, the thing seriously crashed once. Well i have a CD burner for a week or so. Well after they got done, i took over the comp and acquired the task of designing them a web site so that they can "promote her musical talent" She's currently "on tour" which really means sure going across the nation singing at american legions and vfw's and the elks clubs, on her way to nashville. Yeah i hope the best for her, but im not too sure shell make it. Well that pretty much brings me to know, OH YEAH! Coca Cola released the new Vanilla Coke today, it is awesome! My dad brought home a bottle this morning, and it hasnt even been released in stores yet, at least not till tommorow morning.

Well today i had two tests one of which was a VERY VERY important biology test over the internal structures of fetal pigs.... O__o.... Well after being picked up from school i went out to pick my dad up with my step mom and little sister, then guess what the little sis starts being a little punk with her its always me me me "did u buy that for me?" "what about me?" thats about all i hear from her! Well she started trying to ignore me, but wasnt very good at it so i showed her how it works, and it totally pissed her off. Now we're waiting for our company to show up so we can start cooking dinner. O_o... I dont even know the people that are coming over! o.o;;; i hate when that happens. Well i might enter a nother later...

Well today was another one of those days where you want to turn tail and run as far away as possible. I woke up and got ready to go to breakfast with my grandpa and uncle larry. Well yeah i got around and waited for them to pull up, when they did i found out we get to go pick up uncle larry's new fiance and soon to be step daughter. Well i was thinking fine ill give her a chance. BIG MISTAKE! We get to the restaurant and she treats me like i know absolutely NOTHING! And if you know me that is the quickest and easiest way to get on my bad side. Well she blew it big, if that bitch ever tries to treat me like that again we will have fucking world war three on our hands. Well i didnt get home until around one. I sat here and watched a movie or two and took care of my plant for a while. Oh yeah, bad news my best friend from McAlester caught me on ICQ and he told me his mom died ON MY BIRTHDAY! It made me feel sooo bad. While i was celebrating he was mourning the death of his mom. It pissed me off so bad cause she was like the nicest person in the world She always made me feel like i was at home when i was over there and she was like the coolest person that i ever met! Well that nearly made me cry, if u know me then u also that i dont cry very often. Well that should bring this entry to an end, cept for Shaun, hes still pissed at me well i apologized and he said he would consider accepting so well see how that ends up. BYE!!!

o_o
Well today was pretty good. I got out and made some money, and well o_o school was really REALLY boring. Even my computer class was boring. I got home, and once again the only thing that really happened was that i sat down and had 2 hours worth of homework to do. I need a life.......................................................................................

o_o;
Well i found out today that Megan really doesnt care too much for me. I didnt get to do much today, just school which wasnt that bad cause i didnt have much work at all. Life would be a lot easier if i had friends to talk to around her. I have a lot of stress in my life, i dont know what to do about it anymore. It scares me. I dont know if im coming going or dying. Ash has been having a lot of headaches lately, and it really worries me. Yeah Megan says she gets them all the time too, but ash really really seems to be hurt by them. Me and rose broke up the other day. Big surprise there. I saw it happening a two weeks ago. Lifes a confusing experience. Okay i need to get off the depressing bitch express. My step mom still bitches about being sick, i really think its all in her head, but whos to argue, i dont need to cause she gets really mad at me. I am SOOOOO tired of hearing her bitch about things its not even funny. I mowed the grass earlier, and now shes bitching because " the grass is too high around her van" O_o i mowed that area, the mowers set high. If she would have payed attention the whole yards that tall. well thats enough complaining for now.

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