And life goes on
Lika , thank you for your kind thoughts. I don't have a cold, though--just haven't been able to sleep much in the last 5 days. And the same thing is happening tonight, too, dammit. I drifted off briefly and dreamed of airplanes falling from the sky.

That's probably because Bob insisted on keeping the TV on all day with coverage from the tragedy. I finally grew tired of seeing the plane hit the second tower, and did the laundry and washed the dishes instead. Then I sat down and read "The Hero and the Crown" by Robin McKinley, which I hadn't seen since high school. I really have to learn to not try to read my books when I'm supposed to be packing them.

I had a job interview today, via phone. An insurance/investment company wanted to offer me a job at about 8K less than I'm making now. However, they wanted me to start October 8th, and I have already promised to stay at Wellmark until October 26th. Shit. I really need a job. On the other hand, I can probably do a little better. I know I'll probably have to take a slight paycut as Dubuque won't be paying Des Moines salaries (which is pretty damn sad, as I would probably be making 20K more if I worked in Chicago), but then again, Bob will be making a lot more, so I can afford to make less.

Bob's really concerned about how the recent tragedy will affect his new job. Can't say as I blame him. The FAA is going to come under major fire regarding this. On the other hand, he's a techie who works on radar and electronic landing equipment. So I doubt much of this will affect him at all, except for beefed-up security measures.

Speaking of security measures, HOW THE HELL DID THE TERRORISTS GET THOSE KNIVES ON THOSE PLANES? For one very dreary summer during college, I worked Airport Security at the D/FW International Airport. I spent the day looking at x-rays of people's luggage, and we stopped ANYTHING at even slightly resembled a knife, gun or bomb. And that means anything--including a suitcase filled with dildos. Well, in the machine, it looked like a row of bombs....

I once asked my grandma, what they did after Pearl Harbor. She said, "Now, baby, we got real mad. And then, we got into the War. And your Paw-Paw, now, he had to go out to the Pacific for the Navy, and I went to work fixing the airplanes. But you know, honey, your momma was just a baby then and we still had to take care of her and do the shopping and the laundry and go to church and everything else. Life don't stop for no war nor anything else."

Thanks, Bob-Bob. I'll remember that.
Wednesday, September 12, 2001 12:40 a.m.

More
Bob just came home. Evidently, the businesses in Des Moines that are close to the Federal Building have closed and sent their employees home. I wonder if Wellmark did, too?

I got tired of watching the chaos on TV--no one knows anything and the idiot vulture journalists are just babbling mindlessly. Bob eats this stuff up, though, and is glued to the set.

It's just a pretty, peaceful day here in Iowa, far from the fumes of downed airplanes and falling bodies. It's almost like the tragedy doesn't effect us, except that Iowa depends on Washington's leadership and New York's money, as much as New York and Washington DC depend on Iowa's corn, beef and pork.

I keep thinking of those poor people trapped in those buildings as they collapsed. When we watch our anime or fantasy or war films, it really doesn't connect that death and destruction are all part of the adventure. I think I may do some writing on this...
Tuesday, September 11, 2001 11:32 a.m.

Day of Infamy
I am home sick today. My husband called to tell me the news about the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. The World Trade Center has completely collapsed. No one knows how many people have died.

This hits home as Bob is going to work for the FAA, although Dubuque is hardly any kind of target.

An old friend of mine works at the Pentagon. I hope she's alright.

The ones who did this are clever, especially if they don't acknowledge the act. Unlike Pearl Harbor, America cannot point to a country and declare war. Odds are, this was not the act of a government, but of a highly-organized terrorist cell. Like a blinded giant, without a clear foe, our leaders cannot direct their retribution. It makes me sick.

But I'm still wondering why the terrorists want to attack the World Trade Center? It is (was)not much more than a glorified office building. I wondered that the last time the place was attacked. It doesn't make much sense.
Tuesday, September 11, 2001 09:42 a.m.

Gone to the worms
I took little Hickory to get her shots today and found out that she had roundworms. So guess who gets to rush home and bring in the other three cats for deworming medication? Lucky me.

Tegan reconfirmed her reputation as the spawn of Satan by being totally unreasonable. The vet finally had to sedate her to get her to take the damn pill. Nabiki, usually pretty agreeable, was upset and bashed him in the eye with her claws. Lily, docile as always, just took her pill and went back in her little cage. Good kitty.

Bob keeps telling me this is not my fault, but I'm the one who had to be chivalrous and bring the poor little stray kitten home. Now we get to repeat this process all over again in three weeks, except the lucky vet will be in another city. Yee-haw.

No progress on Wings of Desire fic, but I did send off several resumes. Druckfic continues to elude me--I know how I want to end it, but getting there from here is not working! I'm not even trying on the Kenshin story. *tears hair* What's happened to my creativity? Usually when I'm stressed, stories just write themselves! Oh, beloved muse, why hast thou betrayed me?
Monday, September 10, 2001 10:23 p.m.

Insomnia
And so, once again, I'm up in the middle of the night. My sleep schedule is all messed up. I hate when this happens. I'm so out of it, I can't do much but surf the web or park myself in front of the TV and shove in a tape of Jane Austin movies. For some reason, they always help me get to sleep. At least I'm not working tomorrow or Monday, so can make up the sleep during the day.

We went up with my inlaws to show them the house yesterday. A four hour drive up to spend an hour looking around the house and then a four hour drive back. The more I look at the place, though, the more I like it. Yeah, it'll take some elbow grease (I'm obsessed with stripping the nasty finish off all the woodwork and getting to the oak.) One of the doors in a closet actually had been stripped and the wood is absolutely beautiful. We're also going to have to repaint the exterior. And the kitchen needs to be remodeled with better cabinets. However, with some work, this place could be stunning. I'm really stoked. Maybe that's why I can't sleep, huh?

Oh, and just a few blocks from the house is this which is just so very cool. Our house is one of many on the bluff above. My mother-in-law kept saying that "This doesn't seem like Iowa, does it?". I think it does, but Dubuque is certainly not Des Moines. Which is why I'm starting to really look forward to moving there. Not that Des Moines is a bad place, but Dubuque is certainly feeling more like "home" already.
Sunday, September 9, 2001 01:55 a.m.

NOT New York!
You go, Lika-chan! A city doesn't HAVE to be New York or San Francisco or Austin! Yeah, those cities have a lot of things going for them, but they also have a lot of traffic, and crime and everything is WAAAAY too expensive. (And yes, I have been to New York and San Francisco several times. I lived in Austin for 5 years).

We're going up to Dubuque tomorrow to look more at the house and take room measurements. A news report about unemployment rates scared the bejebbers out of me today, but I guess I shouldn't worry. Ah, hell, who am I kidding? I'm scared I won't find a job once I'm up there! I don't want to be a housewife!!!

Finally figured out the right title for my new story, and hopefully can get some good writing in tonight! I want to finish this before I move, because afterwards, I'll be busy for awhile unpacking and such. And yes, Satsuki-chan, I'm hoping to have the drunkfic done too. With Bob being up in Dubuque next month, and me being in Des Moines, I'll have to do something to spend my lonely hours...
Friday, September 7, 2001 06:18 p.m.

A home of our own
Well, the furnace checked out, and the sellers are willing to let us rent the house for a very cheap price for a month, so all we're waiting on is the financing to come through. It's a VA loan, so those take awhile. I stupidly agreed to stay at my job until October 26th, but we need the money and it's not like I have anything positively lined up once we move. Mom and Dad are coming to help me pack, so I won't have to do it all by myself. I'm just so relieved that we have a place to live!
Wednesday, September 5, 2001 05:51 p.m.

So cool
Satsuki-chan just did another lovely illustration for my latest story. Damn, chica, you are talented! Check out her site, linked at left (The Queen of Cups). Anyway, she's got a lovely style that reminds me somewhat of Charles Vess or Mika Kaluta. See Green Man Press and Kaluta Studios links at left. I really have to learn how to get links into these entries.
Wednesday, September 5, 2001 04:28 a.m.

***Panic!***
Bob's moving up to Dubuque in 3 weeks and we STILL don't know where he's going to stay! Furnace thing still up in air, finance thing still up in air, not sure how we'll swing money for the move, can't do it ourselves...no way, I'm too fried as it is. Bob conviced we can, says his brothers will help. Yeah, right, like they did last time when they never showed up. Evil co-workers being snotty, evil boss being bitchy, evil nerves completely frying. Trying to make list of things to do and going on three pages, single spaced. I want to quit work Oct. 15th, but may have to stay to train replacement...WHY? They have treated me like a red-headed stepchild for 2 years! What the hell do I owe them for? Need money, need good reference, must turn back into good little corporate drone. I hate myself.
Tuesday, September 4, 2001 08:49 p.m.

Kitty Name Change
I decided the new kitty's name is not Ryoko, but Hickory. She doesn't look or act like a Ryoko. Lily is still the cat of the moment, though. Poor thing is really freaked by the other kitty. Nabiki is dealing well, although cautious. Tegan hasn't deigned to make an appearance. But then, she was always anti-social.
Monday, September 3, 2001 09:54 a.m.

Dawn
I got up early this morning and was working in my office/studio, which faces east. It was nice and quiet, Bob and the cats were all asleep. It's funny, I've never watched the sunrise from here before. Damn, I'm going to miss this house.
Monday, September 3, 2001 07:40 a.m.

Another kitty
I went for a walk in the woods with some friends and came home with another kitty. She's about 4 months old, black and brown, with golden eyes, long tail and polydactal feet. This is SO the wrong time to add another cat to the family, but there's a weird karma thing going on here. Bob named her Ryoko, and we took her to the vet to make sure she didn't have Feline Leukemia or Feline HIV or any other nasty disease. She's pretty healthy--someone must have dumped her. I can't believe I'm doing this...
Sunday, September 2, 2001 03:30 a.m.

Lots o' stuff
Well, we sold the house. The 2nd day after we put it up, we had an offer (we were at AnimeIowa in Cedar Rapids at the time, so our long-distance bill is going to be horrendous). It was low, but through a series of counteroffers, we got the house up to a price that would let us get out of here with most of our down payment. Then, while we were up in Dubuque looking at houses, we found what we think is a suitable one for slightly more than what we paid on this. I don't think it's as nice (it's a larger house, but the lot is half the size of ours, and we'll need to work on it some), but then, we put a bit of work on this house too to make it as nice as it is. Anyway, we have offered for it, contingent on the completion of sale on this house and an inspection. The inspection on the Dubuque house did turn up a furnace issue, and we're having a specialist come in and give us an opinion. All this happened in the course of last weekend. Stranger still, I had emailed a resume to a company up there and they've already called me for a phone interview. They said they'll be in contact in the next couple of weeks, and that they want to schedule a face-to-face if I can get up to Dubuque sometime this month. Bob's security clearance and drug test went through, and so he's 100% officially hired now. He starts up there September 23rd. If we can get this furnace thing and the financing worked out, it seems like the sellers are willing to let us rent the house for a month until closing in late October. We'll be setting a final date of work for me next Wednesday--I was going to be nice and work as long as I could for them, but after a disquieting meeting on Friday, I'm finding myself disinclined to stay longer than necessary. Ingrates. At least they're letting go to 4 day weeks so that I can interview up in Dubuque--I'll be working Tuesday through Friday from now until the time I leave. And let me tell you, I'm READY TO GO. On the plus side, the backstabbing has decreased. My co-workers know I'm leaving, so they won't waste energy on harrassing me. I swear, I've rarely worked among such unpleasant people before in my life. But I guess it's made me stronger, right? Yeah, right. It just made me miserable and anti-social for almost 2 years. Never Again, I tell you. So anyway, it looks like I'm moving in mid-to-late October? Mom is coming up in early October to hassle me...er...help me pack. We were supposed to go visit them on vacation in October, but the moving thing happened instead. Dubuque looks like it'll be a nice city. It's a typical river town, nicer than most. Very Catholic, so it's probably back to the Broom Closet for us, although there IS a Unitarian Church that Bob thought might be good to hook up with. Lots of hills, although not as many trees as I'd hoped (they got hit hard by the Dutch Elm Disease). More ficcing today--I'm up to ten pages so far on the sequel to "Smiles" and that's raw text without the descriptive embellishments I usually add. Still contemplating that Sei-chan as Uke fic...which is really odd, considering I don't like writing yaoi or even shonen-ai. The idea amuses me, though, and by golly, Sei-chan deserves it.
Saturday, September 1, 2001 09:50 a.m.