Evanston, No!

The elevators at our building are very stubborn and short-tempered. They stay open for approximately 2.5 seconds and they don't like to open when you put your foot/arm into them as their doors close. They are impetuous, really, obstinate. I think it's because w'e're in Evanston where the people are very much the same way. You'd think affluence would calm you down, but apparently it makes you hyper and rude. Not that everybody in Evanston is affluent, or even rude for that matter, but it is common enough to be a defining characteristic of the town. Who woulda thunk architecture resembles a townspeople like their pets do!? The roads here are narrow (i.e. the minds), the sidewalks are overcrowded and skinny (i.e. their souls), and the public policy toward homeless people is evil (i.e. their elevators).
Thursday, September 5, 2002
04:43 p.m.
by: adam douglas payne