Friday, June 27, 2003
i dreamt of so many things, people, events that couldnt possibly happen in reality. i dreamt that i made friends with JT, i dreamt of virn, of a sweet guy who gave a bouquet of flowers as tall as him to his other half, having lessons at the S4F classroom and a lot more i just couldnt recall. myriad dreams burst like bubbles floating in the air and i aroused from my slumber wishing i was still dreaming. after 12 hours of sleep, i woke up to an uneasy state of mind and a throbbing headache, feeling really empty inside. all the misty images, blurred visions and and queer feelings had left me hanging in the mid air, stuck, ready to crumble. i need someone to bring me out of this cycle of illusions.
i fear going back, to facades of pretence and smiles, to hidden and vicious feelings i cannot see. she taunts people for their hypocrisies, so why try so hard to keep up with friendships on the surface? Sighs.
maybe i should just stop looking like a fool to you.
i should just try to chase these thoughts away, and hopefully my headache as well. my entries are always so self-contradictory. Ahh, there's just something terribly wrong with me today!
Shoutouts to Boonie: Yo Yeo! We must all study hard together okayy? It'll all be over in the twinkling of an eye. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going! We are such mean asses by the way! -winks- Gotta change, okay?
i wrote a song for you at 03:26 p.m. Wednesday, June 25, 2003
Maybe i should just change my whole perspective instead of filling this entry box with grumbles and whines.
Today, i am grateful that
And that certainly makes me feel better. :D
Apologies to meilin! for delaying our meeting time for about an hour today, for not being able to answer your chem questions and for being online now! -guilty look- i'll go off now! :)
it helps to think that we're looking at the same sky.
i wrote a song for you at 08:41 p.m. Wednesday, June 25, 2003
Sighs.
i wrote a song for you at 12:08 a.m. Tuesday, June 24, 2003
i just received this from the mailbox.
Imagine. . .
i wrote a song for you at 03:13 p.m. Monday, June 23, 2003
sent peicheng off in the morning before embarking on this seemingly never-ending passage walk from terminal 2 to terminal 1 led by yanchoo in search of macdonalds breakfast. my, that stupid girl, we didnt even catch a glimpse of it. yes, meilin and i almost killed her! ALMOST!
after breakfast at burger king, we took a sky train (smartly) back to terminal 2 and started mugging at coffee bean. besides warming my seat there, i kind of fried my brain cells too. after just a few hours and we were all going crazy there, playing silly games, measuring whatever with our rulers and laughing non-stop. oh wells, yanchoo sort of drived meilin and i nuts and green by radiating rays of happiness and excitement too. her face was really flushed with joy! good for you girrl. :D
i look back on my life and realise the growing distance between me and the friends i miss so much. boon, chel, szuyu, jess, kai, han, sa, sin, mich, slackers, virn! so far it was getting hard to bear recollecting the memories we've shared. everybody just seems to be too caught up with their own worlds. bleahs. oh wells, it's alright, Friends just made me laugh! :)
by the way, The Wedding Singer is such a sweeet show and i love the song!
i wrote a song for you at 11:04 p.m. Saturday, June 21, 2003
just talked to jessica on the phone for 2 and a half hours. i love Lea Salonga's angelic voice! :) and jess just reminded me of this really cuuuute song. i think i put this up in my blog about a year ago, but who cares anyways. sweeeeeet!
I wanna make you smile
i wrote a song for you at 12:22 a.m. Thursday, June 19, 2003
this is probably the only time that i didnt play cards all night long, or actually went home at around 8pm on a chalet's last day, and still have the energy and eyelid power to come online and recollect all the times we've shared at the chalet. whoa. in the end, i gave mileu a miss. next time chel! :)
Day One
Day Two
Today
by the way, thanks Zigg., whoever you are, for the contribution of the song title. :)
sadness is beautiful, loneliness is tragical
i wrote a song for you at 11:48 p.m. Monday, June 16, 2003
had quite a fun time with the badminton girls {all except andrea and joa ling] at fish and co today. i personally think waiyin and meilin cannot sit together because they create havoc! :D i finally tried famous smelly beancurd [ALWAYS shown on tv] at the taiwan food fair! oh wells, it wasnt THAT smelly after all, though waiyin and meilin ran away at the smell of it. it tasted rather good too, i must say. everybody left one by one, leaving only hsien fei, meilin, huimin and i walking around the streets, absorbing the atmosphere of the great singapore sale. i still remember boon, chel and i shopping away last year! :D BIMBOS, we need to meet up and shop and dine anytime soon!
now here's a real sad song, title anyone?
i wrote a song for you at 09:00 p.m. Sunday, June 15, 2003
absolutely fantastic. i typed out a new entry which has vanished into thin air in a matter of seconds. :/ just watched the badminton finals between Vj and Rj played a few weeks ago on channel 5. saw many familiar faces, mian, kerliang, agnes, everybody! the finals was played in toa payoh sports hall as usual. it reminds me of our finals in sec 2, the very place where a large crowd of spectators came down to support, the very court that we claimed victory on and basked in long awaited glory. it was a great experience, no doubt.
went for the performance at the esplanade last night and meilin was dozing off like a little piggy. hee, we didnt know we were going to watch an old chinese classic. tried studying with kai earlier on in the afternoon and i took roughly 2 hours to finish my inequalities tutorial, which was somehow incompleted with several blanks and doubtful answers. sigh. M4! (Maths Makes Me Mad) sighh, i am so gonna flunk my block tests. :/
anyways, ripped this off shan's blog
i wrote a song for you at 01:58 p.m. Friday, June 13, 2003
i think my procrastination has gone too far. from December holidays 2002, i told myself i must pack my sec 4 books and prepare for a new jc life. wells, i just did! packing my secondary school books made me ashamed, or rather, amused by myself. i found the whole loads of blank worksheets that were always missing during lessons. sorry mrs khong! (and mrs tan and yang lao shi) textbooks contain silly scribblings often done out of boredom, or the courtesy of rachel chow wei yin haha. Anybody wants ten year series, or better still, purchase them at low prices can come look for me, good condition guaranteed! amidst the flying dust and heaps of seemingly useless(as of now) sheets of paper, i found my To Kill a Mockingbird, Julius Caesar and the stacks of geography notes which i have to sadly watch them go inside the big brown box. to these i may never touch again, au revoir. :/
finally had a chance to meet up with jessica after training today. come to think of it, i havent been to her house for ages! i sank at the oh-so-familiar big arm chair (my fave seat hee) and felt that sense of familiarity once again. suddenly, it feels like all recent feelings and happenings are transient and i'll soon have to put on that blue pinafore, white school shoes and set off towards that easily recognised blue and pink buildings, and smile to all the familiar faces i miss so much. i'll go jessica's house as often as i like and we'll start all the playstation, vcd, tennis, swimming and badminton stuffies again. i'll enter the classroom i call mine every morning with sleepy eyes, and it is always filled with magazines, girls' talks and lame jokes whatsover. i'll run next door once the bell rings and find szuyu dilly-dallying again. it was as if life was back to normal. Oh well, time passes, things change, even Danny don't exactly run to me the way he did anymore.
suddenly, everybody around me are plagued by problems, whether is it cca, relationship, everything. cheer up people! we have to struggle through these phases somehow, though it's easier said than done.
i wrote a song for you at 11:06 p.m. Thursday, June 12, 2003
i almsot forgot how was it like to walk alone on a drizzling night like this. the rainy scent that wafted its way through the dampness of the night, the dim street lights that shone on the puddles of water on the road, the cool night breeze that gently caressed my skin and the sheets of raindrops which dissolved all the heat and worries in the air, adding to the tranquil night. i basked in the lamp rays and let the world faded away for a moment. ahhhhh :)
i believe both the badminton team and club exco members found the enrichment useless, just as expected. our onto some excitement, thanks Zn for the ticket to Arts Festival at the Esplanade! my little wish of watching a real performance at the Esplanade has finally come true! hmms, i will still enjoy all the waterfront performances, nevertheless. :)
HAPpY BirThdaY HAN AH BOO! i wrote a song for you at 09:42 p.m. Thursday, June 12, 2003
wee! am in the school library now with sinhui while the rest are having econs make up lessons. oh wells, i'll never gain much if i attend it anyway. woke up at an atrocious time of 6:50 am on a June holiday morning for 1 and 1/2 hour of mad physics. :/ gonna have some badminton enrichment at 3:30 pm later and listen to mad mario spouting rubbish. and i'll probably be spending my time rolling my eyes or giggling away. Uh, God bless me.
i wrote a song for you at 12:43 p.m.
Sinhui: Stop playing CM and study! We must pass at least 2 subjects okay? [let's forget about econs]
Chel: Set! We will go for the new zara sale on friday with boon! :D
1. i've spent quality time with a good friend!
2. i managed to understand all the spdf crap (and those silly orbitals)!
3. i have only four subjects to study.
4. i am granted four days more to mug before block tests arrive.
5. it may be only five days more to the beginning of the block tests, but it is also only eight days more towards the end of it all.
There is a bank that credits your account each morning with ,400. It carries over no balance from day to day. Every evening deletes whatever part of the balance you failed to use during the day. What would you do? Draw out ALL OF IT, of course!!!!
Each of us has such a bank. Its name is TIME. Every morning, it credits you with 86,400 seconds. Every night it writes off, as lost, whatever of this you have failed to invest to good purpose. It carries over no balance. It allows no overdraft. Each day it opens a new account for you. Each night it burns the remains of the day. If you fail to use the day's deposits, the loss is yours.
There is no going back. There is no drawing against the "tomorrow." You must live in the present on today's deposits. Invest it so as to get from it the utmost in health, happiness, and success! The clock is running. Make the most of today.
To realize the value of ONE YEAR,
ask a student who failed a grade.
To realize the value of ONE MONTH,
ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.
To realize the value of ONE WEEK,
ask the editor of a weekly newspaper.
To realize the value of ONE HOUR,
ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.
To realize the value of ONE MINUTE,
ask a person who missed the train.
To realize the value of ONE-SECOND,
ask a person who just avoided an accident.
To realize the value of ONE MILLISECOND,
ask the person who won a silver medal in the Olympics.
Treasure every moment that you have! And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time. And remember that time waits for no one. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it's called the present!
whenever you're sad
carry you around
when your arthritis is bad
all I want to do, is grow old with you
I'll get your medecine
when your tummy aches
build you a fire when the furnace brakes
oh it could be so nice growing old with you
I'll miss you, kiss you
give you my coat when you are cold
need you, feed you
even let u hold the remote control
Let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink
put you to bed
when you've had to much to drink
I could be the man
who grows old with you
I wanna grow old with you
Adam Sandler's Growing Old With You
the barbeque was more organised than the one at shan's house. xiaowei (tathua's gf) was a real great help! we had some little ups and downs though, like how wenhooi's and ailian's attempt of coating the kunning fish with tumeric powder didnt exactly succeed (the fish didn't get erm cooked), and our stingray smeared with chili was a delight! the swimming pool area right in front of the chalet was enchanting. several times, we sat outside and watched the little stars twinkle in the sky, the silver threads shimmer on the turqoise water and enjoyed the company of one another. night was spent at the bowling alley and at the chalet telling unsuccessful ghost stories, as well as the usual truth and dare. ooh, suggested playing blind man buff and i THINK most of them enjoyed it? it was heart-attacking!
woke up all frozen and ready to thaw without realizing that we were going to ice skate. in the end, only ailian, bernard, char, dad, horny, mum, tathua and i went. oh wells, i had quite an embarrassing time there! seow hong and zherui came to join us for ktv at our usual place at cuppage plaza. just simply love some of the songs we sang, those that can express your emotions in the way you cant. headed back to the chalet and the girls actually took 45 minutes deciding who would swim and at the last moment, i couldnt fit into eline's swimsuit! so we scurried here and there, frantically trying to make the most out of the 3 swimsuits we had among us. finally, eline, mum and wenhooi were all prepared to indulge in an evening's swim. it was barely after 3 seconds after eline and mum went into the water when this weird security-guard-looking guy hurried them out of the pool impatiently. exasperated in disbelief yet left with no choice, the girls made their way to bathe. after coming out of the bathing room feeling all clean and refreshed, we spotted some of the guys in the pool enjoying themselves. we couldnt believe our own eyes! the guy we met hasnt bother to tell us the pool was closed for a while as the lifeguard was away. oh Thanks. -rolls eyes- taught them and xiaowei who joined in later the name game (think i play this with almost all my different groups of friends in st nicks haha) and it was pretty hilarious! for an instant, i wished i could video-taped their expressions and exaggerated reactions down. :D had a little nice chat with wenhooi and it felt pretty good. :) thanks horny! by midnight, all of us tried scaring ourselves with a horror movies marathon and we kept changing discs, discussing over the scenes and dozing off (or at least eline and i).
i simply hate waking up on the last day of chalet, knowing we have to pack up and go home. from my experiences, we would just eat breakfast and embark on a long journey home, some sort wordless, probably due to exhaustion. today was so different. after breakfast at macdonalds, we embraced the cool pool water and soaked ourselves, watching the sun rays bounce off the pavement. we then bade farewell to the chalet, ending it off with a group photo at the lobby. headed towards Giant in the usual path which we had set our foot upon numerous times and wenhooi and i kept saying farewell songs i don't know why. too little sleep i guess haha. there was just this slight reluctance to go home inside all of us. though physically exhausted, we were all mentally awake. the final decision was made to go bernard's house and quite a few went. ailian, eline, seow hong, zherui, zhengnan and even mum and horny who live so far away. we split up and played jenga (spelling??), mahjong and monopoly. heard zhengnan kind of monopolized the whole game! haha, he was flaunting away his thick stack of notes. everybody couldnt fix the camera at the last minute and yet i successfully took a candid shot of zherui's face(enlarged)! yay! it was definitely good, the way we ended off these few days of togetherness. i wont say the chalet was a success in terms of interaction among everybody, or there wasnt any unhappiness involved, but for some of us (unaffected enough), it was indeed a precious memory we'll keep in our minds for many years to come.
It took me by surprise
When I saw you standing there
Close enough to touch
Breathing the same air
You asked me how I'd been
I guess thats when I smiled
and said just fine
Oh, but baby I was lying
What I really meant to say
Is I'm dying here inside
And I miss you more each day
There's not a night I havent cried
And baby here's the truth
I'm still in love with you
That's what I really meant to say
And as you walked away
The echo of my words
Cut just like a knife
Cut so deep it hurt
I held back the tears
Held on to my pride and watched you go
I wonder if you ll ever know
What I really meant to say
Is I'm dying here inside
And I miss you more each day
There's not a night I haven't cried
And baby here's the truth
I'm still in love with you
What I really meant to say
Is that I'm really not that strong
No matter how I try
I'm still holding on
And here's the honest truth
I'm still in love with you
That's what I really meant to say
cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be close to your special someone and feel warm,comfortable, and needed
What Sign of Affection Are You?
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dear teacher-in-charge started the whole enrichment by yakking non-stop about the history of badminton racket, from those ineffective wooden jointed ones in the past to the carbon graphite ones today. i sat before the short and stout figure, who occasionally spouted seemingly sound physics concepts yet stupid when applied to the sport. "the long lever system of the arm", "the elbow as the pivot", "the torque of the lobing action" and "the harmonic(is this how u spell it?) action" reduced us to giggles and fidgets. barely 15 minutes of practice on the court, the figure already diffused into the walls of the hall, out of sight. seriously, i'm at a loss of whether to laugh or cry.