|
Searching for pleasures overrated Wednesday, May 7, 2003
i've been in extreme situations. firstly, those surely can do it one lar remarks have been replaced by all the
just do your best regardless of who your opponents are or even worse, hcbt cannot make it. then, former glory i've basked in for years attained by my fellow teammates has transformed into defeats i have to taste along with my sweat and effort. of course i would rather the latter. today's match was horrible, including mine. i can blame the school for making hcbt the only team without a proper coach, or even our luck for getting such strong teams in our groups. excuses excuses, it all comes down to nothing. nevertheless, i hope the whole team can pluck up courage and gain confidence about tm's crucial match, no matter how slim our chances are, no matter how terrifying our opponents appear to be.
on a lighter note, i was so delighted to meet my SNBT peeps again! ate at century square with some of them after the matches. i miss the spirit and unity that bond us together, the after-tournament dinners and even the talks we had with our coaches. i would do anything to revive the times of togetherness. :/
looking at the time, it's hard to believe that i'll jump into bed soon!
fabricated tales ramble on at 07:16 p.m. Tuesday, May 6, 2003
as i play against TJ tomorrow, and AJ the day after [and SR on Saturday], may i possess the beauty of courage, the wonders of strength and the essential calmness and alertness needed on court. no matter how difficult these 2 matches are, We will fight them in battle.
Living my life in a slow hell
fabricated tales ramble on at 10:44 p.m. Monday, May 5, 2003
I LOST MY HANDPHONE! -SULKS-
fabricated tales ramble on at 12:18 a.m. Saturday, May 3, 2003
i tried today, i really did. went for make-up maths lecture with sinhui today but a pity, our concentration didn't exactly last long. :/ anyways, went town with szuyu after that and we walked from far east all the way to heeren and back. decided to catch X-Men 2 and as usual, we bought a lot of food which didn't quite survive long enough to accompany us even one quarter of the show teehee. the show was quite entertaining i must say, with several nifty special effects. the visuals deserve a thumbsup, though i slept for a teeny weeny bit during the show as i was too tired over the week. it's quite a good catch, despite the fact that i don't exactly fancy sci fic films.
i woke up to a sea of misty pink clouds today. i gulped the cool refreshing air and absorbed the lovely morning atmosphere. sometimes, this is all i need to move me on with life. :)
fabricated tales ramble on at 09:52 p.m. Thursday, May 1, 2003
i think my body clock is lagging very badly. i slept happily at 7 pm last evening, planning to go online and watch tv the minute i wake up. little did i know that i'd carried on sleeping till this morning, before awakened by a message from michelle. i missed my dinner, supper, my tv my computer! bleahs. anyways, met up with boon, han and miche today and we were all laughing like crazy in the midst of the purple decorations, tiles, chips and good ol` pals. i so miss them!
had my first cs session in hwa chong yesterday. sinhui and i were slogging away like 2 mad bulls while 4 other guys were happily unstacking and passing chairs around like 4 lazy sows! note the gender difference nowadays. well, one guy was quite nice though. in fact, one of the most gentlemanly guys i've seen around. oh wells. anyways, JT was super funny and nice! i was in for a pleasant shock. after carrying chairs, we cleaned the window panes in the hall, as well as cutting up newspaper and rolling them up at the office afterwards. went for lunch[or dinner since it was already 5] at thai noodle house with sinhui char and shan after cs. the laughter gas was passed around the table and we were all laughing like crazy people. i think the shop owner must be deeply traumatised by us 4 lunatics. me? i was traumatised by charlene's newly invented laughter and her spitting water during our water competition. lol!
for now, i think my friend must be greatly traumatised by me. i'm asking help to fill in my elasticity notes as there's an econs essay tm. Arghs. i'm so tempted to skip school tm!
fabricated tales ramble on at 10:04 p.m. Tuesday, April 29, 2003
ripped this off szuyu's page :)
THREE THINGS I LOVE
fabricated tales ramble on at 12:25 a.m. Monday, April 28, 2003
i don't know why i'm not sleeping yet. i don't know why i'm online. i don't know why our grouping for competition sucks. i don't know why i live so far away from school, making me come home at ten plus almost everyday. i don't know why i don't know a single thing during lessons. i don't know why there seems to be something missing in my life. i don't know how to get out of this. i don't know what my heart wants. i don't know.
chel and boon, we gotta meet up one day!
fabricated tales ramble on at 11:24 p.m. Sunday, April 27, 2003
i slept for a total of 15 hours before waking up to the bright sunny day. it goes to show how much sleep i have missed these days. dreams after dreams, they make me realise how much i'm missing my friends. i dreamt that i was playing mahjong with chel, boon, mich, han, pris and simin. [in my dream, many people can play at the same table, don't ask me why] the hectic week has finally come to an end and i was indeed too busy to come up with anything meaningful. as time passes mercilessly, it gets harder to meet up with old friends just for lunch or chat. life is getting so monotonous with absolutely nothing to look forward to. nobody likes to take the trouble to go town just for dinner, movie or go someone's house to have fun. everybody seem too caught up with their boyfriends, new schools or books. the latest physics lecture test has caused much hoo-haa as if the As are coming while i had only one miserable night to study for it. the process was horrendous. i sat amidst the flux of intelligent cells and witnessed all the brain juices flowing, while my mind remained blank, void of any alienic formulae or concepts i've read the previous night. people who filled the whole paper with answers came telling me they will flunk the test. me? i remained silent.
went ktv with mum, char, eline, shuyun and alan after the test for a pouring-hearts-out session. it was pretty amazing as you just need to hum a few tunes and the rest could mouth the lyrics along with you, unravelling a whole train of songs you once adored. a tinge of emptiness suddenly stang me with its bitterness. and i wonder why. Sighs.
fabricated tales ramble on at 03:36 p.m. Wednesday, April 23, 2003
i'm so tired so tired so tired. been getting out of house when the sky is dark and returning home when the sky remains the same darkness. intensive trainings have robbed away of my much needed energy to keep awake in class as well as sleeping time. nobody told me there's 4 trainings this week! :( still, i kind of enjoy trainings. at least i can train for NAPFA which is nearing and at last, we ain't slacking! also, i enjoy the sports and indulging in it can keep me from thinking about unwanted things.
i wanted to pour out a lot of thoughts and feelings but i'm too tired to think about them now. later!
a sad song that sounds so happy :/
fabricated tales ramble on at 10:40 p.m. Monday, April 21, 2003
gosh i can't believe this! reached home at 1130 pm and i just finished bathing. training ended at around 830pm and every step i take is a challenge of my depleting energy. my eyelids are heavy and my body is weak. there's chem test tm on reaction kinetics which i dunno what the hell issit about and arghs, 2 periods of pe! what the hell am i doing online?! if it's circuit training for pe again, i don't think i can handle training tm. :(
i think i laughed too much today. this morning during pledge taking, charlene stood in front of me and she was laughing and shaking uncontrollably like a mad woman. the laughing fit soon spread to me and sinhui and one could observe 3 mad beings "vibrating" away. Oily made us stay back after the assembly and made us stand in our reg no. she specially shouted sinhui and my name in an annoying way as if we've looked so unpleasant to her. [AND VICE VERSA, of course] YUCKS URGHS EEKS. on our way to coro during recess, char sin and i were busily impersonating Eminem and recording our "heavenly" voices to the tune of "Cleaning Out My Closet". i laughed till i nearly banged into the lamp post. the funniest thing that happened today was charlene and the lan shop uncle. Haha! she told the uncle I want 2 burgers and a Dee. morever, she sounded so natural and stressed on the Dee word. alright okays, Dee is this 03S69 girls inside joke. gosh, we were all laughing till we nearly collapse on the floor! :D after training, alex cheng mei yanc and i went to serene centre macs for dinner and laughters, screeches and screams filled the whole place. when it's meilin + yanchoo + me, outcome can be disastrous. there's just this unspoken force that could easily transform us into 3 mad hyenas. my, i think i'm going insane with all these laughters. :)
fabricated tales ramble on at 11:51 p.m. Friday, April 18, 2003
sighs, had to forgo class outing today coz my whole body was really aching like mad, after intensive exercises for 4 consecutive days. madness, i had trainings on mon, wed and thurs, pe on tue and thurs and dunno how many bball/netball sessions on these few days. when i woke up this morning, i felt so drained and tired. :( hope ya guys had fun!
i slept the whole afternoon away while the rain depleted my mood further. i officially proclaim that i totally abhor my form teacher. the sight of her totally turns me off. worst of the worse, i get to see her everyday. oh, i didn't know playing cards is such a BAD thing, that besides having cs and submitting the forms to the principal, our parents will be informed of our BAD behaviour. not that i mind cs, or informing parents thingy [they'll prob laugh it off], but i cannot stand the way she handles the situation and makes it sound as if we've erm shoplifted or something. when she was talking to the 4 of us, i felt as though she was directing the whole thing at me. her last words was " hope i will not receive such things from u again" and she shoved the cs form right into my face. gosh my life is so interesting, i'm so excited to have 2 form teachers who have something against me for 5 long years. yay. strangely, girls, and especially st nicks girls have this strange disgust towards her. lol. oh wells, as eric say, i should try to like her to make my life better. i will i promise, though it's gonna be tougher than reaching the moon. Hehs.
sorry to those i've ignored recently, or can't smile or crap with. i've been too busy, exhausted and lost in bad thoughts.
Quote of the day: if you spend your whole life worrying how other people feel, you lose track how how you feel
// in a trap, trip i can't grip
i tried too hard
fabricated tales ramble on at 10:51 p.m. Wednesday, April 16, 2003
all the unspoken weariness, emptiness we hide inside everyday. loneliness gets back to you when you stops for a while and watches the world revolves a second without you. it wasn't pretence of laughters, but self-deceiving optimism. you thought you're happy coz you're laughing but it all comes back to nothing.
// On a cobweb
fabricated tales ramble on at 09:46 p.m. Tuesday, April 15, 2003
these two days had left my whole body aching as if i did loads of kua bu back during snbt training. i can't even walk properly, especially down the stairs! gosh, the scene of me falling down and spraining my ankle is flashing right before me already. monday was training with several sets of footwork, while today's pe was just plain ol` ciruit training. urghs, what's new? while other classes can enjoy a game of soccer, basketball or floorball, we have endless ciruit trainings, whether is it morning or afternoon pe. recently, our class has been playing bball/netball too. hmmm, we are starting to lead a healthy lifestyle to make up for all the junk food gobbled at coro. last night, i was so exhausted after reaching home at 9 plus that i succumbed to my comfy bed straight after watching Friends. and God save me, there's PT tm!
Saturday, 12 April, 2003
// My tea's gone cold
fabricated tales ramble on at 10:19 p.m. Wednesday, April 9, 2003
i'm pretty tired now, actually, very tired. the miserable number of snoozing hours, boring lessons and basketball on a wet court, all these are enough to drain away the total energy i possess. there's no songs i can play to drown me inside the music, nor can i put into words how i'm feeling now. maybe it's like being stuck in a moment i can't get out of, or that sometimes life just doesn't seem to go the way i want it to be. i miss out with boon and chel, shopping with szu, at jess' house, training with virn and yy, crappin with sa, gossipin with sin, laughin with ROR and pouring out troubles to those who care. there's this sudden wish that i can quit school. sick of school? or sick of life. i know not.
i don't know how many times i've said this, but it's pretty sad when you drift away from friends you once were close to. good friends slowly become hi-bye friends, to strangers you see on the streets everyday. ten years down the road, how many friends will i keep? how many will i lose on the way? i fear to imagine.
szuyu and i just decided we will go out one day every week. thanks dear, it's pretty comforting, at least we are making two sided efforts. :)
fabricated tales ramble on at 09:10 p.m. Wednesday, April 9, 2003
Test
that's so true!
fabricated tales ramble on at 12:22 a.m. Monday, April 7, 2003
my page is finally up! :) though there are many areas to improve on, i guess my lazy bones are striking again. badminton tm, later!
fabricated tales ramble on at 01:54 a.m. Saturday, April 5, 2003
i think i'll give up looking for a host and rely on my ugly url [freewebs.com] to make a homepage. yes, after 2 years, there's this sudden urge to create a homepage again. though, my html knowledge remains slight and constant lol.
// I know your eyes in the morning sun
fabricated tales ramble on at 03:46 p.m. Saturday, April 5, 2003
the esplanade displayed its utmost brilliance last night. it was a dazzling beauty. i grabbed the opportunity to absorb the atmosphere, or should i say, slowly blend into its magic, almost insignificant. i love the gentle waves, the tranquility of the night, and even the sky that hid away the stars under its velvet blanket. it was a pity the performance last night at the waterfront wasn't my cup of tea. there will be jazz, pop, blues and acoustic rock performances today though. what a pity!
watched May. as what the movie critic said, give it a miss!
fabricated tales ramble on at 01:53 p.m. Thursday, April 3, 2003
yes, i can't believe it too, mahjong for 2 consecutive days! today, i played with my 2 good friends from hc [badminton]. yeahs, we're short of one kaki but oh wells. had to forgo class outing because i promised this side first by the way. :/ lady luck was smiling radiantly at me today, with several consecutive qing yi se and what meilin called, "small" san yuan. everytime i displayed my winning tiles, i could sense my 2 pals eyes staring at me, seething with "rage". Lol. bankruptcy fell on them, an uproar was caused, which eventually led to a change of places over argument of good or bad fengshui. although sars holidays robbed us of our much needed trainings, i could feel my abs building up with the presense of meilin. she could send me and yanchoo laughing like 2 mad hyenas with her laughter [or scream] and her silly ways and behaviours. gosh! on second thoughts, perhaps not. with all the potato chips, ice-cream, jelly and drinks we gobbled up, there wasn't even any need for dinner. today's mahjong was some sort of a karaoke session too, sang along with my mp3s hee hee. think we can have a karaoke outing the next time round! :) sighs, will miss yan choo's presence pretty much. :/
fabricated tales ramble on at 11:31 p.m. Thursday, April 3, 2003
everybody seems to be suffocating in this stagnant, monotonous sars holidays. as for me, i'm trying to "create happiness out of the bitter" [ku zhong zuo le]. chel pris, simin and i set off to compass point for lunch before coming my house for a few rounds of mahjong. gave chel her birthday present -a top she wanted so much and i suppose she love it! hee, told her i felt so touched for her. lol, i am indeed penniless but nothing beats putting a smile on a friend's face. anyways, chel's a pretty fast learner [and cornified player]. we are really acting like tai tais, playing mahjong and gossiping the day away. most importantly, we caught up with each others' lives. that's why i say mahjong enhances social life! pris was hilarious as usual, igniting laughters with all her "gong" and "bu-ed" and what-have-you. i smiled today, for the moment we are able to appreciate each other's company, for the fact that some of us have gathered again. :)
another thing that makes me happy: Friends is back to town! okays am i too slow? why, i was so sad when they called it the last season for last year's episode. Yay, my weekly dosage of happiness has returned to my side. :D
fabricated tales ramble on at 12:41 a.m. Tuesday, April 1, 2003
the headlines nowadays are sure depressing. switching on the tv, i see SARS, war, and now the famous hongkong actor leslie cheung [is this how you spell..] i've known since young just jumped to his death, uh, on April Fool's Day. :/ met up with szuyu and went army market for lunch. i ate Ah Balling tang yuan and bak kut teh! :) we finally watched Infernal Affairs at my house [ok, i know how wols is that]. i must say the show is really good! all the twists and turns, ironies, though the ending really saddened me. okays, mahjong with peeps i miss so much tm. later! :)
fabricated tales ramble on at 10:19 p.m. Monday, March 31, 2003
i am pretty shagged after 3 hours of intensive badminton matches with the j1s today at yck cc. yc believes that this seesion we came up ourselves is even more tiring than normal training. lol, i agree. i gonna ask what huishan asked in her blog, did anybody watch gan chai lie huo last night? weee! i love that show, super cuuute and hilarious! hmms, going out for a while tm with szuyu before she comes my house for vcd! :) hmms, i cant think properly now.
fabricated tales ramble on at 10:25 p.m. Saturday, March 29, 2003
eeps, been listening to David Tao's songs for the afternoon and this creepy sad feeling is creeping its way to my heart. i still remember chel and i loved his songs pretty much and listened to them in class. right, chel? :) the rain is falling heavy from the sky above, forming a distorted image of the world outside and tapping against my window panes. the song Angel is playing like an whisper in my head, smooth and soft. i can almost see two sides of the world from here, so tranquil and peaceful inside, yet so messed-up, confusing and vague out there.
here's the Enneagram test i took, with courtesy from szuyu :)
fabricated tales ramble on at 03:32 p.m. Thursday, March 27, 2003
Random thoughts of a thoughtless night
the starless sky dropped on the world tonight, cutting my face into a thousand tears.
fabricated tales ramble on at 10:46 p.m.
|
 |
  `ping 03S69 | sec4faith02 
68916350 sparklingpills @yahoo.com  lex designs page gbook aileen bean bingyi boonie celene chel cheng eric han huishan jess jingyi min pris ruxuan simin sin szuyu virn vivien wai kit wei yeeon yijia yun zherui |
 |