3 months we kick ass! i can think of maybe 2 who had real faith, what bad asses.
today we had our P2 SLP 2 at walker. i lost my voice yelling at 6th graders. during our break we worked on the poster as a group (kinda) and had the walery's "boofey" for lunch. i think i ate pork sausage...weird. who let the battery on the camera run down? well at least we got a good 20 or so of us to enjoy for years to come. i think i am really digging it all the same.
it had been a long time since i had my last leg work out. felt really good to get that out of my system. and i think that it was all for the best to have not really done it for so long. it feels much better with longer time inbetween.
couching was awesome. the whole 11703 questions thing was cool. i think i really learned a lot. of all topics in the world who discusses gas. sure the prices are higher and all but still?
with a karabeaner for a belt, a jones for a vase, got the flowers in before the midnight hour of the 3rd month.
speed racer should have driven a corisca...i hauled tonight.
tomorrow is whitey inskeeps birthday. also no 5th, gotta finish the poster and make sure our fearless leader james is on it. hope laura fitz doesnt BI-itch out. she wont. and we will rock. the tripple date is not going to be a tripple date...monica is homebound all night.but now i am going to be a 5th wheel on the 6 wheel bike. but it will work out some how. it will be good. and then saturday i get to go to school for my health 2 credit.
Thursday, April 17, 2003 at 06:31 a.m.
what now! today is exactly 3 months for us. hell yeah!!!
today is wednesday. writing on your webpage while in the school library is what its all about. not really. i really have been sucking it up when it comes to writing in a consistant basis. last night i was on the phone for 2 hours and monday i dont even know what happened. i think i was really tired cause i got a lot of sleep that night.
MONDAY
nothing really happened. picked out pictures for senior stuff. then we came home and hung out. we watched random TV and talked a lot. it was good to talk. she got home late because i am stupid and it wasnt a good thing. she is sick and i can feel myself getting tired easier and having headaches more often. i am prolly dehydrated.
TUESDAY
well we tried to go to walker but she had left. thursday is our SLP and we havent really confirmed the date with anybody. so i guess tomorrow is the time to get things done.
i did so much homework. i finished 2 full math assignments, read some, took notes, and arranged things for my presentation. static is occuring due to lack of sleep. being tired easier makes the average human moodier. that sucks. where i am going is not an option still under consideration. or is it? i guess we will find out soon enough. scary.
TODAY
just in the library. strangely ok with having hung out with kevin. he is a pretty mellow guy when girls arent around and when it is only with 2 or 3 people. we just got back from a clapping convention. that was so stretched out. oh well. missed my presentation but i think i can make it up on friday. tomorrow is the slp and i dont know if i have the opportunity to do the speach in the morning because i may be going straight to walker. i guess we can find out.
after this class my stress level for the day drops. i found out some good news today in class too actually. i guess all except for it being a liability, that i cna arrange to go to my favorite study place and try to get my work done there. i know i can get more done when the freaking weirdos who play magic at lunch arent around screaming their damn heads off. i cant concentrate or tollerate too many stupid people, and the stupidest people are the ones who kill their frosh/sophomore lunch hour in the library. willamette library is much much quieter and more mature. sweet.
i have written a lot right now. partly because i have nothing to do and partly because it has been a while since i have written on here. i found out i cant work this saturday, the extra health 2 class is being taught from 10 to 4. damnit. i really needed that money. but what that means is i am going to have to pull the money from my account, give it, and then work more weekends and put more of it away until i am both re-emberesed and providing the appropriate increase. damn. so i guess i will get about 20 bucks to kill a week for next 3 or 4 weeks. prom will be worth it. i feel like i am being relied on to get everything done. it seems like they just expect me to go and make all the arangements. i sure as shit didnt plan on that. i figured they would at least want/try to be present while figuring out the arrangements. i guess i'll be making the calls. oh well.
after today i am going to need to really get around to figuring out how to archive everything. this page is getting pretty freaking large and if i am at home on my 56k piece of crap it doesnt load very fast at all. i'll prolly get around to it.
i have to steal the publications camera again. its gonna be tough to create the entire poster and everything by friday. i wish we had time in class today to figure out what everybody wanted it to look like. i hate when they dont talk to us. when they dont inform us. its a waste of my time and kills the entire point. its a class project, not a leader-and-some-mentors project. i want to let the other people have input so that it turns out the way they want it to. i dunno what we will do. tomorrow is 3 months for her and i and i am pretty sure that we will have to wait till friday or saturday to do anything because we will be busy with getting everything in and caught up. creating an entire poster will leave no time for homework. oh well. i just hope they will all help out.
this is by far the longest entry i have ever written. i feel like certain other people who write books every other day. i thinki should go. i'll prolly write again friday.
Sunday, April 13, 2003 at 10:28 p.m.
holy crap! i dont even know what i have done for the past freaking days. i can hardly remember it all right now. of course i am way too tired to remember much.
THURSDAY
if i can recall correctly, we called it an early night. we found out both james and monica would be gone for friday and i was in cahrge of debrief, again. i dont remember most of school. i went to work and then met up with her at her work where we went to my house. we hung out at my house for a while. a long while. we talked a lot for a change. we called it an early night. monica had the willamette parent student tour the next day and i was going to try and go to all of my classes.
FRIDAY
things did not turn out the way they were going to. crisis situations and stupid parents were key factors. i guess the willamette tour was also code for "parents piss off your kids and tell them what they are going to do for their future." thats too bad. not a lot to do on friday night. i think i must have downloaded something like 20 bright eyes songs.
SATURDAY
well we found out that monica doesnt have strepp throat. hooray. we also found out she has mono. damn. but i am almost excited. i have never had mono. i never really get sick so this will be interesting. in the morning we painted benches. that was kinda fun actually cept we had to get up early. we hung out here and then there...and i took a nap. then i hung out with nam and jeff and we caused mischief. then there was a solo AP mission at o400 hours.
SUNDAY
that brings us up to date. i woke up at nams and got in a fight with viet. tashka is cool and should not be talked shit about. damn power rangers. my little sister leah got confirm this morning. then i came home and did a little homework. i had a lot to make up. then monica came over and we took the digital camera into shutterbug. we spent 15 on 30 pictures. i dunno how good a deal that was but we got mostly all good pictures. some better than others. then we did a lot of homework. i am almost all caught up in math. i have a cow. he is my P.O.W. and i will hold him ransom. stress is tough but the care is still obvious. its really late for me, hopefully i will write tomorrow.
Wednesday, April 9, 2003 at 08:50 a.m.
last night was very awesome. it wasnt the way i thought it was going to be but going to portland still kicked ass. it was a good day and a good evening even though it didnt follow the exact plans. we dont need to follow the exact plans. sometimes i forget that. i had a good time. my back and body hurt from being over the computer for so long but it was good to get out and do something. the drive wasnt too bad. on the way back it was kinda rainy...really rainy. but it was prolly the whole 90mph factor there too. who knows. bRie is so fuckin cool. she is really fun to hang out with. how would she have guessed the umbrella bag thing? wow. couching was fun. i am stupid sometimes. i tend to mess things up that are too good to be true up to that point. if not for her understandingness i would be alone. today wont be too bad, class will be short and the meeting will be too. williamette library will hopefully be visited. i think i am going to have "dreams" be my topic of research. it should be fun.
i'm so sorry.
the rest of the week will be good. things will be getting back to normal and that is awesome. it will be good.
wow a whole weekend with out her is weird so today was a good day. i hate yearbook, but other than that today was a good day. i am so extremely tired and need rest for the ataris tomorrow. it will be very awesome. i just cant lose my focus with school...that will kill me. i am on top of it...or i can be.
Sunday, April 6, 2003 at 12:36 a.m.
i dont consider this to be sunday yet. today is saturday. saturday wasnt a very good day. starting at like 1-3 am things werent good. then waking up at 9 wasnt fun. felt like a school day. the weather was so shitty out in portland. but it was ok. i hung out with jeff, jake and nam. it was fun to spend time with good old friends. then tonight we hung out with my little sister (tasha) and katie chopstick. we ate some Wallery's and all went to nams to watch the ring. i have seen that movie a lot now. but it was fun and gave certain people an opportunity to sit near eachother.
my poor little nerd is not better as we had hoped she would be. i think this isolation thing is really starting to wear her down. i know it would wear me down terribly. hell the way it is now is starting to get to me. but all the same i really hope she gets well soon. i think she has been sick long enough.
for the most part today sucked and didnt suck at the same time. but whatever the hell it was, tomorrow will be better. i know it will. i cant hardly wait.
Thursday, April 3, 2003 at 10:21 p.m.
damn i have gotten really bad at this. i guess i have been busy though. up late trying to do homework or desperately seeking time with the sick little nerd. i feel so bad for her, being sick for so long really messes things up, like school and all that crap.
suprisingly i am not sick. even more so i am getting to all of my classes. so far the work load isnt tooo bad. math is a bitch but thats expected when the teacher is too. i think that having math first period means my brain is blank, and whatever i see and hear i kind of take in and end up remembering cause its the only thing on my mind. but oh well thats school.
i got into western. sad as this might sound, i dont feel too excited. i said as i was driving us to my house "i feel like i should be nervous" but i didnt care. i know its not USC, and i dont own a sweater from the school that i can wear everyday, but it works for what i want. i dont like to think of college though. too many complications that make it hurt. so fuck it.
MONDAY
was just a day. monica was deathly sick and came to school for 4th period and her walker thing then we hung out after school for a long time. though she wasnt feeling well so we called it an early night. school seemed short but i know it will be longer soon.
TUESDAY
the assembly was not the way i thought it would be. instead i stopped by at her house and brought her a muffin and coffee. but i guess it upset somebody. we hung out that night, which also upset somebody. but oh well. i didnt go in to work and i helped buy Becky's birthday present which is funny cause at the same time reid was run into. how funny. i made it to all my classes and it was cool i guess.
WEDNESDAY
not real eventful. we had an earthquake drill. monica was able to go to 4th and her walker thing. i got to see her more than the other days, but her parents are showing who they are, and i dont like them. it makes me feel bad for their daughters. she was even more sick yesterday night than before. it wasnt good.
TODAY
today i got to see jesse brink for an extended period of time. that was kinda cool since i dont see that guy much anymore. i really wish i knew more hot people, my binder is looking pretty blank. i am tired today and still managed to be in a decent enough mood. creating cards kicks ass, even if it is for almost 3 hours at a time. so does buying ataris tickets for cheaper. seeing Her was great, at any moment that i could. math is almost making sense. i love considerate parents. being as sick as she is cannot be dependent on how well she takes care of herself, but i guess its everybody's fault who get a cold or the flu, how unresponsible can one get?!? jamba juice is always nice. naps are great too. soon things will be alright again. tomorrow could be awesome, we will see.
Sunday, March 30, 2003 at 10:31 p.m.
welcome to the end. the end of break. the end of procrastination. the end of skipping...ALOT. the end of things brings the beginning of others. the beginning of having 6 classes...EVERYDAY. the beginning of doing homework on a constant basis. beginning of typing in this everyday again. the beginning of finishing school. i dunno a bunch of other stuff.
so saturday was cool. not a whole lot happened. the past 2 days have been very "hecka" warm. today especially. i walked outside tonight around 9 and i was still warm.
FRIDAY
after my secret, i did take a nap. i hung out with pooja for a short while and then lifted weights and played guitar. very mellow and boring. then monica's awesome employers were out 3 hours later than they said so that sucked and i passed out.
SATURDAY
well, calm and laid back. tried to sleep in as much as possible. walked and hung out. it was so nice out. did some errand running to target and where house with monica. i dont know about you, but i cant handle that Chicago soundtrack. it just isnt my thing at all. dinner at monicas was fun picnic style and her very carming father was the entertainment. then we came to my house, filled once again with the people who live there, and slept.
SUNDAY
i woke up still burning cds. that was fun. then i picked up monica and we went to my church. not feeling good though so we left early and i talked some little kids into eating flowers off of plants and roots off of flower bulbs. that was fun. really fun. then we went home and watched romeo and juliet, the newer one. then i went and hung out with my fellow korean warren. we went shopping for the freaking peer mentor auction basket. it took like 2 hours. nowhere has beaver stuff. took a long time. then i came home and did some homework. and then watched a weird movie. then she had to go home and i did some homework and now i am going to go pass out.
today was good but sad. sad because school is tomorrow. and today is the end. but it was good. and this was the best spring break i have ever had. so i cant complain.
Friday, March 28, 2003 at 04:27 p.m.
jeeze, spring break really has me off task. another few days in a row of not writing. damn.
WEDNESDAY
well i woke up early to go to a doctor appointment at 8 am. then i went to work. my family took off for a while. they should have a good time. then i hung out with monica for a long while. we went shopping and hung out with reid and Becky. wednesday was a long day.
THURSDAY
woke up later than expected but earlier than usual. got out and about around 11. the coastal drive sucked pretty bad seeing as it rained like hell off and on through out the time. my car was over heating and i think there is something wrong with the oil filter. got into Lincoln around 12-12:30. Kyllo's seafood bar and grill has some damn good food and monica had never been there so thats where we ate. then we went and walked on the beach near the D river. the shortest river in the usa. we played on the rocks and hung out there for a while. the weather, despite how bad it was on the way out, was really nice. it was hardly windy enough for the kids to fly kites. then we went to the outlet malls forever. we end up shopping a lot. but it was cool. then we got lost, came home, and i hung out with the neighbors while monica went and had dinner with molly. then we went on our double date which lasted until like 1:30. that wasnt good. but the day was so awesome. good friends are fun to chill with.
TODAY
i woke up and bought donuts. that was cool. i saw tanners sister. she is funny. then i came home and ate donuts. that was cool too. then i hung out with monica and had the best strawberry lime jones soda ever. it was soo good. i swear to God those lids tell the future. that is by far my favorite kind. we watched Amelie again. we just sat around and drank jones soda and ate donuts. and then she went home to babysit some little kids till late. so now i am playing guitar and considering taking a nap till pooja calls with something to do. i will write more later on. today was an amazing amazing day.
Tuesday, March 25, 2003 at 11:59 p.m.
well, i didnt write my fucking paper...damnit. i also didnt go in to work. but thats ok. i hung out with monica. not doing homework, drinking jones soda, chilling with kara, and having discussions with her dad. we went and saw kien who is one hell of a cute baby. we also i picked up molly. she is very cool too. at the hospital i saw my friend chris garcia again. it is funny since i saw him last night at like 1 in the morning down at safe way, but prior to that i hadnt seen him in what seems like at least a month. so that was fun.
all my stupid procrastination has left me with a lot to do. now i have a paper still to write. i have to get a lot of work done tomorrow. i didnt clean my room yet. and i have friends to chill with and a smaller amount of time to do it. oh well it will eventually be alright, at least thursday will be.
Tuesday, March 25, 2003 at 12:24 p.m.
wow its been a long time since i wrote. longer than i havent written in a long time. i have just been out really late and really busy. every day of break up until today i have been up at something around 7.
SATURDAY
well not a whole lot happened. i woke up and went to work with nam and jeff and viet. work wasnt bad. in fact i had this crazy experience that nobody other than one really understands of could. it was amazing and in a weird sense very reassuring. after work i took them all to nams and went to monicas where we ate chicken pot pie that her mom cooked. it was really good. then we hung out till late at my house and watched 8 mile. it was good to couch for a while after working all day.
SUNDAY
i woke up even earlier. i went to the church of oldies with monica to hear her sing. she sounds so amazing. i was really surpised cause she has never really sung like that around me. it was really awesome. then i went back up to portland and worked again. the wether was weird but it wasnt too bad. picked up monica when we came back into town and went to KFC. stupid KFC. they had the picture that looked soo good. fat white colnel piece of shit sanders. then took viet and nam home and went to my house. we caught the end of the academy awards. and hung out the rest of the night.
MONDAY
woke up early again. went to portland with monica and her mom. she was getting her senior photos taken. she wanted me to come because there was a good chance the photographer would take pictures of us together for a not-so-high price. which she did. we ate baja fresh. then we came home and had the whole afternoon and evening to kill. so we went all over lancaster and looked at different stores while full of baja. old navy. then we came home, watched 8 mile again, and hung out. took her home and then i passed out.
that brings me up to date. i have to work today and get a paper written so i dunno what else is going on. i'll write more tonight i think.
Saturday, March 22, 2003 at 12:03 a.m.
yearbook pays off. so do college visits. even if they arent my own. resting was so nice today and especially knowing that yearbook was done. that was awesome.
8:00, get up and go to school. 8:30, smash face into computer with realization that 3 spreads must be completely recreated. 8:31, get to work. 12:30, eat 7 hard shell tacos, 1 mexi-nugget and a cherry pepsi. 1:00, go home, shower, rest.
3:00, rest some more. say hello to monica. 3:30 eat macaroni. 6:30, leave for the mall. get face plate....enough with the time card thing. so we went to the mall to kill time and then met the awesome reid and Becky at marco polo. some lady's car died so i offered to give her car a jump but it shorted my battery and reid had to come out and help too. got $10.
then we went to reids and watched Psycho Beach Party. a pretty weird movie but good. i got real sick of the dialogue though....real sick. but it was fun. i am really tired though. i got home at like 12 or so.
today turned out to be a really really good day. i had a good time in everything i did. spending time with monica was somewhat limited, haha, that made it even more fun.
tomorrow i work but i am only brining myself home so i can get to my other plans sooner. sweet. tomorrow should be a pretty good day.
Friday, March 21, 2003 at 01:02 a.m.
i really hate stupid people. they arent a problem till they start fuckin my shit up. and today they did. a lot. yearbook is going straight to hell and even i cant save it. when people replace new different photos on their disk with the same name as old photos, and they need both and lose the old one, i want to kill them. its like kicking myself in the face and taking my senior photos. it doesnt work out at all. and it makes me be at school longer than a normal school day the first of my vacation.
i like yo drop by in the mornings when most people are still showering and having breakfast. thats why the visits are so short. people need to get things done and be up and moving around.
after yearbook and random visits we went home and crashed for a while. that was really nice. then when we found out ventis was closed at 7, went and got mall chinese food. mmmmmm. it was good. we watched 8 mile, a pretty good song. reminded me of the dysfunctional version of save the last dance where the focus is on rapping not dancing and the white person is a guy not a girl.
today was a long day. it turned out to be excellent, but it was tough also. my day is always good with her in it. i love my nerd. tomorrow more yearbook, then sleep, then eventually who knows. damn.
Thursday, March 20, 2003 at 01:10 a.m.
i feel good. real good. i am so content and happy with life right now. i have nothing to complain about really. at least not anything in reguards to just me. war. damn i dunno what to say. what a waste of life. even if he is a piece of shit, i bet his mom loved him. it makes me so sad to think innocent peolpe died today. i hope we "ended" the problem (killed saddam) today at his little meeting. all it would mean if we havent is that more life is going to be the cost. it makes me want to cry.
today was another yearbook day. first was not very productive cause i slept in. but third through sixth was good. i was after school till 7:30 tonight. that sucked. but after that i picked up monica and she came over. we watched the extended version of the lord of the rings. since we didnt even start the movie till like 8:30 or 9 we didnt get it all finished by 12:30 when we figured we should take her home.
it was nicer than i expected it to be tonight, just relaxing and couching. it feels so good to hold somebody close in your arms while watching Gandalf kick some ass. i was very very content.
tomorrow more yearbook. i think i am going to go in real early and get a lot done so i can have the rest of my day to do what i want to do. resting will be really nice when i have the laod of yearbook off my back. i dont really know what the plan for tomorrow is, but i know i will prolly like it a lot.
Wednesday, March 19, 2003 at 01:15 a.m.
other than my abrupt kicking-out, that was sweet. falling asleep is so cool. someday i will do it all the time and it will be very cool. i cant hardly wait. but its cool.
i was so tired all day today. other than "waking up" to spend time with monica and having dessert, my day revolved around working in the publications room through all my classes other than 2nd and 5th. i put together 26 pages of senior-parent-messages until 6:30 tonight. every single parent is "so proud" of their kid and like to use the word "endeavors" a lot not to forget the kids age of "18...eighteen..." thus my hesitation to type tonight. i am so burnt out on typing. but typing on here needs to be consistent so sleep will wait its turn.
roly poly is so good. i love that place and it's spicy chicken. mmmmmmm. that made my day that much better. improvement is what will be. stepping backwards is not. being a lame-ass who bitches about what you write on your page because it offends them (because its about them) when its just your feelings at the time is really stupid and earns you a chop to the throat. its not about who you think it is, i can assure you. i am tired.
tomorrow no school really. just more yearbook and placing of pictures and buying of donuts and being poor at lunch time. i even made a new cd i was so excited for it. a little Al Green and Otis and J5 and the Chilli Peppers... but after school is out and yearbook is done for the day, i am free! freedom is so great when its only a day away. spring break will be awesome. freedom.
tomorrow will be awesome too. resting and just relaxing and just chilling in for the night with mine will be really nice.
Tuesday, March 18, 2003 at 12:05 a.m.
2 months today! what now muthatruckas? today was a good day. a damn good day. school was non-exsistant for the most part. chinese food for lunch kicked ass. and a huge amount of time with monica was awesome.
today we had the incoming frosh school thing and peer mentors got to help out. yey. it wasnt too bad. i talked in an asian accent the entire time and fooled all the kids i was in charge of that i sounded like that naturally. but then as they were getting off the bus i talked normally and it was fun.
then fourth got missed and lunch occured. we went downtown and ate chinese food. it was awesome and i wish i had some here right now but monica took home the left overs. damn. fifth got missed also but not really for much of a reason, just because i had things i needed to do. i did make it back to sixth and got some yearbook work in.
after school i cleaned my car and shopped a little bit. then i picked up monica. i cant believe its been 2 months...it either seems like a lot more or a lot less. its cool though. we went to red robin and then came home and watched moulin rouge. i actually like that movie so i didnt mind.
tomorrow i dont think i will participate with school. there is far too much yearbook stuff to get done and not enough time after school to do it. if i can get caught up on my pages during the day i can fix everybody elses shit after school. pizza tomorrow edwards? hell yes. after a late day at south i think i will go to monica's and chill with her. we have some work we need to do. it will be awesome.
today was awesome. i had a great day.
Sunday, March 16, 2003 at 11:35 p.m.
today was a very good day. a long hard day but it was good and turned out even better. resolutions are being created as we speak. how amazing.
portland was boring but better than yesterday. i was tired but time passed pretty quickly. fixing broken signs and talking on the "celly" kept me pretty occupied while swinging the sign. also, having a cd player and a cd made by a friend helped pas time that much faster.
flash flood of emotions swarms the bay of harbored feelings and sunken concerns. but the sun came out and dried up all the rain. and everything was said and things are good again. patience and understanding, sounds like a disney movie. its all good.
today was long. work was stupid as usual. its annoying when people say they are gonna do something and go to do it and stop part way through because of bump or a breeze. but it was all good. and in the end i had 120 in my pocket i didnt have when i woke up, sharis in my stomache, and a beautiful girl on my arm. life is good
Sunday, March 16, 2003 at 01:27 a.m.
well today was very awesome. sorry to monica becky and/or reid for having them watch the ring and possibly scaring them. it still kinda spooks me. it was much better in theatres.
reid parham is a bad ass and an awesome host. anybody who has both "rescue rangers" and "kung fu" for NES deserves props. his new and improved (if its new has is it improved?) kitchen is very snazy. so is his jet engine of a washing machine. we all had a really good time i believe.
work sucked ass pretty bad today. got their and it was nice up until break...when it rained. it rained a lot. the wind was bad also. then my car got stuck. and nobody gave a shit. that would be fine, except i was their ride. luckily some guy was driving by and helped me out. nice people are cool.
then on to monicas. even though we didnt really know what was going on previous to tonight, the plans that did happen were awesome. groups of friends are always cool. tonight was good.
strangers in the living room. dad snoring. mom possibly movie. running out the door. home under 8 minutes. phone call in under 2. talking to beautiful girlfriend for about half an hour and then sleeping is awesome. work tomorrow but its worth the cause. but now i am sleepy.
Saturday, March 15, 2003 at 12:19 a.m.
today was one of the best days ever! it was just an over all good day. other than being tired as crap right now everything is still awesome. i wish everyday could be like this.
so today was the game. we won by 2. school would have been a joke because nobody was around. but in my very personal opinion, i believe OUR game was awesome today. every second of it kicked ass. i really enjoyed it.
fifth was good cause i wasnt really there. i like big town hero. a lot. then i brought the sandwhiches and drank some dr. pepper. after the drop off i went to 6th and talked to beechy. i like that guy a lot. he is a real good person. he kinda helped me get my shit together in yearbook...maybe.
then on to work. which was fine because i have a lot to do now. i am very busy in there. and i even got to see ben munson. i havent really talked or seen him in quite a while. i got done with work early and hung out with monica and becky.. both of whom are very cool to chill with. taking pictures kicks ass. so does roly poly and renting movies and eating chicken and joe joes from roths. the movie wasnt bad and becky is really fun to chill with. it sucks we missed reid tonight. but tomorrow should be cool. and we will see the ring and it will be awesome. but now i need sleep. goodnight.
Thursday, March 13, 2003 at 11:13 p.m.
woke up tired as crap. i didnt think it as going to be the way it was today. not really bad, but not amazing either. just a day. actually one of the shittier ones campared to most lately.
because of the basketball game, school was stupid and pointless today. as it will be tomorrow. nobody will be at school because we won the game today and the next one is tomorrow at 10:00 am or so. school will be a joke.
so the game then. or something. hahaha. yearbook is about the only class i did anything in and will do anything in tomorrow.
school got out and things were alright. stopped at walker to see an old friend and meet up with a best friend. then rest and becky's neighbors house. arby's is good and swim fan is bad. the tease girl wasnt hot and definitly not worth losing love over. what an idiot the main character was. but it was fun to chill with the nelson girls. and then monica alone. talks are theraputic no matter how many times they have occured previously. its a great with that little tiny thing in your eye. a finger.
i am tired. if not for my girlfriend i would be really pissed off at the world right now. but having somebody supportive and there and meaning it makes all the difference in the world. all i want is to be there for her and mean so much to her. i'll do everything that needs to be done. she does for me.
Wednesday, March 12, 2003 at 10:45 p.m.
i'm really tired, for some reason today really wore me out. not the very best day of my life but it was still good. i am just really tired right now. i will write more tomorrow but summerize today in a paragraph.
school without 1st 3rd 4th or most of 5th is pretty nice. yearbok is coming along. working on cussing. sping break plans changed but thats all good. stupid little kids. magnets are so damn tiring when you keep picking them up. hot dogs are good if they are beef. couching is good if its with monica. getting home in 8 minutes is good no matter what. sleep is good. tomorrow will be good too.
Tuesday, March 11, 2003 at 10:54 p.m.
today was long and more stressful than normal, but good. in fact really good. i was worried last night that i would be in a shitty mood today, but i wasnt. not really anyways.
first sucked cause my teacher is the worst math teacher i have ever had in my entire fuckin life. stupid piece of shit. and then i found out that this awesome painting we put in the yearbok by natalie laswell is not "acceptable" to our over conservative principal and she had to change it. how lame. second i feel like am getting a lot done. espeically with my annual coffee run and private stair well talks. third was slow and fourth was boring. fifth we played hockey and i beat a few kids with the hockey sticks. most lacrosse players are pretty close to being homosexual. not all...but most. sixth was fine.
then after school i made a suprise stop at the old walker middle school. place of my youth...kinda. suprise heres the corsica! how was walker? good. lets go home. what a cool little visit.
gas cost me my soul today. holy bajesus. not even 10 gallons and it was $20. damn. good thing i think it was the first time this month i filled up though so i might make it with only like 2 or 3 times before the month is over. after buying gas i went to work. work was good because i got to deal with the REAL boss. not my boss, but the real one. now that i know what he wants, i am going to have a lot to keep my busy. sweet.
after 2.5 hours of working i walked to monica. we went and ate tacos. i had 4. then we worked on homework. we called it an early night. i got my english caught up and i looked at my math. mr phillips is one of the worst teachers ever. damn. then i played snake to clear my mind.
couching is cool. she's all that is such a chick flick. today was a pretty good day. i have the best best friend on the world. i also have the best girlfriend on the world. tomorrow will be a good day. now i am going to go collapse in my bed. goodnight
Tuesday, March 11, 2003 at 01:26 a.m.
today was one hell of a good day. i woke up and i knew i was gonna be on a good mood all day. i dont know why but i thought i would be and i was. i cannot write too much cause its 1:30 and i need some sleep.
today at school things were fine. math was stupid but nobody knows what the hell is going on in there. i think i took a nap. i am now a Pc for second period a long with all the other crap i end up doing. but i am glad because i need something to help keep me busy and involved. we watched the awesome basketball game in history in cinema. and who needs fourth....really? especially when you have an awesome girlfriend and are going to roly poly's with reid and becky. the best lunch break i do believe i have ever had. especially since vicknair failed at life once again and fell through with out meeting that was sposed to be at lunch. reid is a damn good artist. becky looks awesome...faceless...but awesome. and pe with the special kids was awesome again...i think.
after school i actually got a little homework done. getting caught up in english takes a while. but i am getting there. dude where's my car, couching and nice long talks are always good breaks from life. calling it an early night was actually a good call. i finished an entire essay in MLA format on a topic where i just made a hypocrite of myself. but its done.
goodnight calls are good motivational procedures, along with suprise emails and a supportive gf. but now i must pass out. notes are hard to write when you are tired. tomorrow will be another good day. library. YES! uh. yea
Sunday, March 9, 2003 at 10:44 p.m.
another pretty good day. not a whole lot going on but it was fun. woke up and actually tried to work on homework a little bit. i even got some email. i never get email. so that was cool. i wrote everybody back right away i was so hyped. then i ate cereal.
then me and monica went shopping...some more. and then some more. but it was actually kinda fun, having a girls perspective on guy clothes cant hurt much. i am also really used to it because i go with my little sister a lot too.
there are certain things where dogs are problems. they never really mean to misbehave, but sometimes they get all caught up in the moment and might bite you. that kind of dog is not one you would trust your child around. you would fear the dog would get too hyper and lose it again. they dont mean to be mean, but they still lost control and bit your child, and that is unexcusable. thats when you have to take the dog out back and say "you're stupid! you stupid dog! stupid stupid dog! you cant bite so now i have to put you to sleep you stupid dog!" and then BANG! the dog has to go. its a good thing people arent like dogs. its a good thing they understand how they are to behave and know what is out of hand.
the original macaroni and cheese dinner was awesome. and oceans 11 is a damn good movie. i heard couch is a verb now, so we were couching while watching the movie. hahaha. i dunno. but it was a great, yet early, night. tomorrow is going to not suck as much as mondays can, dude, wheres my car?
Sunday, March 9, 2003 at 12:20 a.m.
today was a pretty good day. nothing too exciting but it was fun. woke up and backed the latest downloaded songs onto a disk and freed up about 1 giga byte. thats good. then i went and took monica and kara out for some food. that was fun to. they are really fun to hang out with. the milkshakes were really good. i lost my application, so i drove.
my mom and her random ass way of thinking thought it would be a good idea to go and make a freaking thanksgiving dinner in march. who knew. but it was good and i had seconds. then we hung out and watched tv. monica had to babysit at 4:30 so i tried to work on home work but ended up downloading some al green also.
then when nam called, me and him and jeff and jake and robert all went to the game. but not before a long freakin drive out to jakes house. holy god he lives way out there. but it was fun. those guys are real fun to chill with. we went to the best damn basketball game i have ever seen. first thing i see walking is, alex viet slam dunking a failed lay up on the opposing team. it just got better. joe is a bad ass. and it was so perfect, miah's game winning three to put us one point ahead couldnt have been better. then we threw things at the fans of the apposing team until it got boring or we ran out of cars and went to costic's. that was fun. 5 guys and costic eating ice cream and playing taboo...is that gay to anybody else?
whats definitly not gay is a meetings with monica late at night at random. hugs feel better when they are like that. i dunno. some shit like that. haha. we a real good talk. lots of topic where the final answer is "I DO..." want to go to there some day, want to do this, like this....ect. it was a good damn day. now i have to face the music of college writing. but tomorrow will be nice too. i need to start my work though. it was a very good day.
Saturday, March 8, 2003 at 12:59 a.m.
today was one hell of a long day for a vacation day. i have been up for about 18 hours. 16 of those were spent with monica. the other 2 were driving and doing tests. so much happened today.
i got caught up in class. then we gave kara her birthday presents. then she wanted to go dress shopping so we went shopping for like 4 hours down town. then we went shopping some more at lancaster. then we ate at baja fresh. good food.
then we went home and hung out. then we went back down town. then we went to bi mart and walmart and did some other shopping. then we went home and ate pizza and watched kara have her birthday party. then i met the grand parents.
then we went to the park to talk about college and stuff. then we went to my house. then we hung out and watched american beauty and ate cookies and cherry candy. then we watched MTV.
then we went to the K.A.M. chill spot and talked a lot about family and stuff. then we went home. then i went home. then i went to bed. but it was a good day. a long eventful day. some shit is really tough right now but it was a good day.
Friday, March 7, 2003 at 12:18 a.m.
i hate who i am sometimes. i'm so annoying to myself. i dont care if i am tired or just being stupid. i piss myself off and often times want to kick my own ass.
today school was school. alex didnt pay me the money he owed me. i went to all but 4th period. 6th really pissed me off. fuckin bitch ass edwards. i swear to God, she tries to tell me to get out of her class or that she doesnt need my help, i am going to crush her fuckin head with one of our iMacs. other than that school was fine. then i went to work and that was fine too. i even got my hair cut. that took too damn long. and it isnt how i meant for it to look. oh well.
then we came home and then went to lefty's. pizza is good. cup of noodles is good. EATING is good. i am good at eating. we finished igby goes down and slept and drove for a while. i am too tird and too stupid to be typing anymore right now.
tomorrow i am going to western with monica. i have to go to school and do school shit and make up tests. but the day should be pretty good i think. i dunno i guess we will see. its so hard to be optomistic all the time. fuck
Wednesday, March 5, 2003 at 10:50 p.m.
wow. today was another fairly decent day. i kinda like this whole optomistic angle thing, though it takes a lot. muchos is good. i am learning short amount of spanish. i also went shopping a little bit. it was a pretty long day. there are certain constant things in my life that make everything seem alright in the end. despite most anything. i am really glad to have them. i would actually be really lost with out them.
school was school. nothing too bad i guess. got those chairs in and am getting a lot done on the yearbook. its funny when people in the class ask me how i can handle the class. its nice to know i am not really losing my mind. social services after school today took about a whole freaking hour. that was ridiculous.
then i checked up on my friend marc but he wasnt around. i hung out with monica and talked a lot. it was good but hard. topics as of late are fairly repetative but never fail to come up. its going to be good though. then we ate food and went shopping. that was fun too. then after some solo's of hers i got dropped at my car and went home.
lastly to make the day even better i found out our tour for Western was alright and the time was good. i also found out our pictures got developed. that would be awesome if they were to turn out good. i think the first ones of us together. pretty bad ass. tomorrow the ring and possibly tasha and nam. i am very excited.
Tuesday, March 4, 2003 at 10:55 p.m.
another awesome day. if this keeps up i might get too used to it. 3 hours of a serious Jim Carey movie? good thing i can focus on things well, other wise we would have been bored off our asses. only one more movie review to do, 3 tests, and a box of kleenex. i dunno what i have been doing, or what has been going on exactly, but life is really pretty good. i dunno what to do with myself except hold on and squeeze with all my might.
i am getting lost in math, but i am trying to stick it out. i am too tired to ask for help in the morning from my teacher. "sorry my little friend, your a fuckin retard." second was fine. stupid western hasn't emailed me back though and that could mess up future plans. missed third again but nobody gives a crap. college writing was fun, i am my own topic group. damn it. on top of everything i am doing a paper on a topic related to minorities and i am one of the two in my class. that's kind of a weird feeling. fifth was fine and sixth was even pretty good. edwards is being good lately.
at work i had a lot of shit to do. but it is mostly done. i like being behind cause that way i always have something to do. the very worst thing in my job is having nothing to do and having to be there. so i let myself get behind to keep myself busy. i also bought some chairs for a cool price.
chilled with gies and finished the two movie reviews i didnt have done yet. thank God for eagle eye cherry.
then on to monica's. saving money, her mom made weird hot dog ghetto food and we made some macaroni and cheese. the we did a little homework and math-book-cover-decorating. so bad ass. then we watched the long ass movie called "The Majestic". not a horrible movie, but not a good one either. longer than hell, and really drawn out. its not like the long amount of time the movie stretched over was interesting. then making my curfew of tonight being 9:30 by 10:45, i came home and ate ice cream and did laundry, another damn good day.
Monday, March 3, 2003 at 10:16 p.m.
today was pretty damn good. school was school. got some homework done. got my yearbook stuff done after school. well closer to done. then i am getting caught up on history in cinema. then i ate salmon!! allergic paranoia kiss my ass!!
i ate the fish with monica. we hung out and went to kinkos. then we went to baskin robins in hopes of seeing Big Ray. no big ray. then we went and hung out. it was cool. we finally went on "the drive." ice cream and drives at night kick ass. i love the taste...ice cream is so good. church parking lots are nice at night. "stick shifts and safety belts, bucket seats have all got to go..." one hell of a great night. wow i feel good. i can't even wait for tomorrow. it will be even better.
Sunday, March 2, 2003 at 11:53 p.m.
work was longer today than yesterday. but its over now and i have money. driving today was a bitch by the end. but its alright. i am really tired. i was quiet for most of the night. but talking and tea is always good.
my parents are tired. when they are tired they are also retarded. i think its an old person thing. to try and get bossy and mean about things when they cannot tolerate most anything. but thats ok i spose. they are considering some sort of grounding. stupid out of control parents.
sometimes friends are hard to find. almost impossible. its so difficult to find good ones. ones you can talk to and trust and rely on. so many unreliables out there. so many out there with the potential to hurt others one way or another. but not me. i will never hurt. ever.
tomorrow is going to be an excellent day. i cannot wait. its going to be the monday of a 4 day week. fuck friday! its going to be a great day tomorrow. notes will be given. good lunch will be eaten. time will be spent. assignments will be copied. what more could you want in life. goodnight
Sunday, March 2, 2003 at 12:31 a.m.
well today is the first of the month. it was a good day but seemed either really long or really short. it was boring until about 6:45 or so. i didn't really do anything productive but i will get money so i don't care. the rest of the day was good though.
i went to portland this morning around 9. me and nam and tanner and jeff all went to hold signs from 11 to 5:30. what a stupid job. but it is going to be worth it tomorrow. yes it surly will be. oh the things i (we) can do with that money. i'm just not really looking forward to another day of standing.
when i got home, i got to spend time with monica. i love spending time with monica. mexi-nuggets are good. so is sierra mist. even the peas in the soup weren't too bad. college stuff is stressful. so are friends who don't try for shit. damnit. but things like that happen for a reason. there's not a lot that can be done. but in the end everything will be fine.
tomorrow i work again. and then i am coming home and showering and maybe doing laundry and then at some point going to see monica. bad ass. i got a note today. that is neat.
Thursday, February 27, 2003 at 11:07 p.m.
today was such a good day. i had the best time with the best girlfriend. i had fun at dairy queen. today was so amazing that i wont risk not doing it justice with attempts of explaining it. goodnight. i am in heart
Wednesday, February 26, 2003 at 10:09 p.m.
today was awesome. i went to EVERY SINGLE CLASS today. it has been one hell of a long time since i did that. i think it has anyways. plus i fould out that i can still do all my history in cinema by next thursday. in english i am caught up and in math i just have 2 assignments to get in before i can get full credit on my math binder. i worked on yearbook after school and got that all sorted and figured out. thank God my teacher isnt completely in charge of the book this year, other wise half the senior parent mesages would be after the advertisements. retarded. in school, today was a good day.
then i came home and watched the rest of harry potter with monica. we ate cheese sticks and talked for a while. it was really nice. then she had to leave by like 6:30 so i hung out and played guitar. i wanted to lift weights but i am going to try and be asleep sooner tonight so i dunno if i will have time.
over all it was a really good day. i got some good crap done in yearbook, got to go out to lunch with some people, and found out i am not as lost as i thought i was in history in cinema. plus i had some really cool conversastions today. it made me feel better about everything, today was a good day.
Tuesday, February 25, 2003 at 11:06 p.m.
today was a good day. a better day. nothing really big happened but it was fine. i got to eat macaroni and cheese for lunch. that was cool. i have changed my page a little bit so it is more personal. i got a shit load of work done today. that was cool too. i also got to hang out with monica for a while. i got a lot of homework caught up on. enough that i can be good to go tomorrow. but now i need to go to bed. i was sposed to be asleep by 11. but today was good. and so will be...
Monday, February 24, 2003 at 09:33 p.m.
i am tired. i dont care though. i need to get things done. so i will get them done. there will be plenty of time to die for a while after i have met deadlines. so i gotta work.
today was another day. most of it was pretty good. but not for a lot of people. and that upsets me. i dont like when bad shit happens to friends. despite why. its one of those elementary school things where you back your friend even if you know they were wrong just cause of your loyalties. fuck.
watched one hour photo. i think it was really over rated and talked up a lot. not nearly as good as i thought it would be. oh well. it kicks ass that the ring is comng out very soon. oh yes.
i dont like soup for dinner. i dont like stupid fights. i dont like college application essays. i do like monica. and i do like my helpful little sister. so the world is at peace again.
Monday, February 24, 2003 at 04:07 a.m.
it is officialy 4:11 am. i finished my stupid essay...the entire thing...and am now doing lanudry and eating ice cream. but now i am cold so i stopped. i am now catching up on my other essay from a week ago which i got an extension on.
today was a good day for the most part. my old youth pastor (Staci) had a baby last weekend. she named it Tate-Foster. i dunno. but i guess it floats. me and my sister went and saw it today. he is so small and cute. cept his hands are kinda gross. they are all wrinkly and peeling. but he is real cute.
then we got some wendy's, kicked it for a while, and went home. where upon arrival i found out it would be fun to go to the willamette library. shes rubbing off on me a little too much. i really like that place. i am honestly going to plan on going there to do homework and shite. it's a really cool place. i find a lot of motivation for my journals there.
after we spent enough time at the library she went home and i went to my church's youth pot luck thing. GAY. well i guess it wasn't too bad, but it was still pretty lame. the person who is leading us most of the time is some weird new age hippy girl. she tries to give off the "its cool, dont worry about anything" vibe while she is freaking out and screaming about everything. she cries a lot. oh well.
my sister has helped me so that i am organized and applied to Western. it is not UCLA. it is not PLU. it is not even U of O. but it damn well is not Chemeketa. and that is good. i am poor. eat shit.
its hard to be 2 people at once. especially if they both have very similar traits. often they become one person with twice as much as they should have. but it is being worked out. but now i must go kill myself with more writing.2 essays in one night, not bad for me.
Saturday, February 22, 2003 at 11:22 p.m.
today was a good day. a damn good day. i woke up and ate some bread. some damn good bread. then i waited around for my good girlfriend to call. my damn good girlfriend. (ok i am done with that) but today was a good day. i had a great time. first off i just hung out at home for a while, played some guitar. i talked with my sister and just cleaned up and all. i had a lot of laundry to do. so i got the basics done.
the day we started, i had also bought some shoes. about a week or so ago a part of the soul broke. BULLSHIT! that's unexceptable. so me and my little sister took a bonding trip to the store. and low and behold, Zumiez came through and gave me another pair. cool. but it was even better because it was a long time for me and my sister to talk. so that was good.
then we went and picked up monica. her and i hung out but i heard something about "becky and reid and bowling". so we went on a trip before dinner. it was awesome and it made her really happy. damn good. hahaha. then we ate and watched most/half of "Igby".
independence doesn't have much, but they do have a bowling alley. and me and her and reid and becky went. it was really fun. i had a really good time. then we came home and then she had to go. so we took her home. and now i will sleep. damn good day.
Friday, February 21, 2003 at 11:21 p.m.
well, today was very different than most days. but it was just one day. so it doesn't matter when looking at the whole span of one's life. or maybe two's. hahaha.
school was fine. went to most classes. all but 4th. went to roly poly during 4th but i got the homework so it's all good. roly poly is good. i like it a lot. we fed zig in 5th. and even 6th went fairly well. considering how many people weren't in class and all the bullshit work i had to do.
after school was really different though. weird experiences happen all the time. that's what makes life life. but one huge ass one occurred and it wasn't fun. i didn't go to work today. i didn't stay after school and work on yearbook. something more important than all of that bullshit came up. so i did what i wanted to do. i went to her home and talked till i had to go. and then after i had to go i went to nams. then i talked some more.
later tonight i went to the musical. some funny ass shite in that musical. i was much more impressed than i expected to be. and it was good to spend time in a social environment with her. get her mind off the shit at hand.
then we killed 15. turned into about 25 or 30. but it was good and necessary. being strong for those around you, and being able to cath them if they fall, is one of my goals in life. life will be great sooner than you think. i promise. believe me.
Thursday, February 20, 2003 at 08:28 p.m.
today was a day of reform. given i am still tired. but it is all good. it is all very very good actually. talks are good. and too all you hoo ha's in the musical, i will be one of the audience memebers tomorrow night. way 2 go!
to the one who knows what i am talking about: they care and so do i. more than you can ever really understand. things will clear themselves up. and i will still be there when it all settles. thank you for talking to me.
lately i have taken myself from my friends. for the most worthy reason on the world, but i still have. and it really upsets me. i miss them. but things are going to clear up. i know i can make them. i will make them.
i am better and stronger and more accurate. fuck yea!
Wednesday, February 19, 2003 at 11:20 p.m.
there's a lot of shit in life that scares me. people don't know because people don't know me. in everday life they are never close enough to know how you really feel cause real emotions aren't present in friends amoung class. the few who do know when i am messed up, or the ones who can tell, are the important ones. she can tell. she's about one of the only things keeping me from falling. if she goes i will inside too.
wow, i didn't know i was so poor. my mother just told me i can't afford to go anywhere other than fuckin' chemeketa. the reason i wanted to go anywhere else is going somewhere else though possibly so who knows. but if i got where i wanted to go it would only take me further away. damn.
Tuesday, February 18, 2003 at 10:47 p.m.
wow kind of an early night for me. prolly gonna go eat some ghetto ramen and do some math afterwards though so it should even out. today was kinda weird. stressful at times but cool at others. i am also really tired so i think that had a lot to do with it. i am going to start going to class a lot more. i need to get more done. if i don't i am fucked. so now that i understand that, i will be great.
i went to leslie today. saw the kid i was sposed to see. we didn't get to talk for very long though. we will talk again on thursday. i did see kara at leslie and that was cool. i think she didn't know who i was at first, but she caught it and we talked. she's really funny. i missed third talking with zig about some important ish. then i went to fourth and fell asleep. then in sixth shit went fine. after school i chilled with nam and tasha and them for a while. then went to work. then went to my other home.
we watched the rest of "a beautiful mind" and ate macaroni and cheese. then after some jack in the box, we did home work. i also talked to BRie. she is cool. i did some anglish and helped monica with some of her shite. we worked on homework till i had to go home. talked, and said goodnight.
Monday, February 17, 2003 at 10:46 p.m.
what now!? 1 month today. so bad ass. it feels like so much longer. eventually it will be. fuck all of you who didn't think it would work. HAHA. eat it.
today i woke up, and sat around for a long time. i didn't have a whole lot to do. i was waiting on a phone call and then from another source, found out that plan wasn't going to float. so i re planned. went to her place at 4, watched half of "a beautiful mind." a really good weird movie. then we went to kwans. the origin. the birth place. the starting point. site at which all things began. on the brink if being sacralegious, the eden of our us.
then we were gonna have pie, but we didn't. we had the big fat greek experience and it was better and worse that i expected. it wasn't nearly as lame as i thought it would be, but it was kinda pointless. she thought it was cute so i guess it was. then i gave her her present and ate ice cream and candles. we hung out for a while, then i took her home. 1 month.
tomorrow i go to leslie. i didn't get my math all done but a lot of it. i will go take the test anyways. big town hero sounds good for lunch, then i have to work. then i will go home and watch the rest of "a beautiful mind" with her. tomorrow should be a pretty good day. today was better.
Monday, February 17, 2003 at 12:20 a.m.
today was an awesome day but now i am tired. my courtesy call around 10 was nice. got out of bed and went to church and youth group. i still feel out of place but it wasn't too bad i guess. then i came home and went shopping with my little sister for cool stuff all over the place. we shopped for like almost 3 hours. my watch is still broken. then i came home and took tanner shopping. then i came home and got a call from my guitar. so i went and picked it up. then i got home and got a call from my monica. and i watched "about a boy" with my sister. then my monica came over and we hung out. laying around and relaxing is really nice. then she left and i watched Tv and talked on the phone.
tomorrow is one month. i know it is only ONE month, but it seems like it's been 3. and mathematically, with looking at the amount of time we have spent together apposed to an average relationship, 2 of our days is almost a week. so, 30 days turned into 15 weeks is like 3 months. and it will be an awesome time tomorrow. everything is ready. or close. everything except the homework that i didn't get done today. but it will aoo work out in the end. 1/17/03
Sunday, February 16, 2003 at 02:02 a.m.
a lot of things have been realized lately. nobody ever told me life could be this good. i have never realized how happy i wasn't until know, since i know how happy i am. it could be that i am also more grown now and things are much different. but whatever reason it may be, life is great lately. and due to certain "elements" of the equation, it will be from now on.
today we went to wallery's with nam and tasha (2 of my favorite people in the world) and that was fun. then we went to my house and watched "about a boy." that movie is really funny and actually a lot better than i thought it was going to be. i am learning that underestimation of "chick movies" is a bad move and for the most part inacurate. though i am not so sure about this big fat greek thing. i guess we'll find out. then we went to safeway (roths is closed at 10:45) and bought ice cream. we came back, ate left over pizza and ice cream and just hung out. tasha and nam had to take off about 12 - 12:30. then there were 2.
her parents have realized she is 18 and can do more of what she wants, including staying out till she wants. "you're 18." so monica didn't leave till about 2 in the morning. another late night good bye. many more to come.
tomorrow i am going to try and go to church. i think i can get my ass up and about in time. going to church will be weird for me. i haven't been to my church in a long time. many reasons for that, none of which are the lack of God in my life. but it has been over a month i believe since i have been there, showing up at random will be pretty intense. then i am going to go shopping with lauren. hopefully i can chill with pooja for a while at some point. i also need to get a lot of homework done. staying in for a night and just fully relaxing will be great. today was one of the best of my life.
Saturday, February 15, 2003 at 02:03 a.m.
valentines day was never so good. i hear a lot of people bitch about how it sucks. but it only sucks for them. today was a good day. school was easy. the assembly (gov cup) was fun. yearbook took most of my time that i would have used to go to work so i didn't work today. then i came home and got cleaned up. she came over around 5:30 and we hung out for a while. macaroni and cheese was pretty romantic. haha. then some down time and Sweet Home Alabama (not too bad). she went home around 11:30. tomorrow another fun date with my little fake sister tasha and nam. we're gonna eat wallerys pizza and i guess rent ice age. but it will be a good time.
today monica gave me a valentines card with a little tiny monkey. the funny part is last night i bought her this black little gorilla thing for today. i guess i am too much like a monkey or something. monica's got her monkey.
lauren went to the game with nam. she kicked it with some friends and i think that was good for her. she was out fairly late so that was good. her ties with south kids got fucked up when she went to west and now she is rebuilding them so it should be good. tomorrow is a big day and i have home work to do.
Thursday, February 13, 2003 at 10:31 p.m.
damn it was a good day. the kid is a cool guy and we are scheduled to chill next tuesday and thursday. this is what the whole peer mentor thing is about. got a lot of yearbook shit done but i have neglected my other classes and am going to get really screwed if i dont get some shit done this weekend. i got to chill with her today and it was really nice to have that time again. went to nams and helped him with his shitty math. gillespie is a lesbian. tomorrow i'm gonna work on yearbook as late as i need to then work. its valentine's day so i will do that thing. west south game may not be seen from the cheer section. but it's cool. my little sister is going to be a peer mentor. i think it will be good for her. i'm tired.
Wednesday, February 12, 2003 at 10:59 p.m.
well, today was good and not so good...but mostly good. i got a lot done in peer mentoring today. tomorrow i go to meet the student from leslie who needs a mentor. i got a lot of stupid yearbook crap done. and i even got to see monica right after school. then i stopped by and saw my little sister tasha for about an hour or so. she is ill but still funny. then i hung out with some friends. we watched "!gby Goes Down." a pretty bad ass movie actually. then we went to sassy onion and then to the girls basketball game. i don't really dig girls basketball much. but it was fun all the same.
Though during the game i got a phone call. that's when i found out monica didn't get the scholarship she was hoping for from her first pick of colleges. i felt/feel so bad for her. i want her to go where ever she wants to. and she really wanted to go to PLU. those bastards. but i am sure it happened like that for a reason. but all the same i went to her house. it's good my friends are as understanding as they are. and it was a really good move to visit her. things are always better when that happens. makes the day that much better.
tomorrow will be another good day. more yearbook shit to get done. get to chill with monica. and possibly go to a Token concert. or do nams homework. sounds like a sweet day to me.
Tuesday, February 11, 2003 at 09:53 p.m.
fuck yea biawtch! today was pretty cool. coffee was fun. i figured out that situation with the student from leslie. i got to go out to lunch with her. i actually had something to do at work. and before work i ran into my oldest friend, chris vargas. chris is such a cool guy. i really miss chilling with him. i am gonna stop by sometime soon. then i kicked it with pooja. who is also very badass. haha. then i found out about my grade point average. for the past month or so i have been worried i wouldnt have a 3 point and would not be able to drive without paying the extra money a month that insurance would charge me. i have been driving all over hell and damnation just because i was sure i wouldn't be able to as soon as the insurance company got a hold of my grades. but guess the fuck what? i got exactly a 3 point!! boo-fuckin-ya! and my lowest grade was a C in math with 26 missing classes. that's like a third of the semester. cool. then i made (decorated) cookies with some very bad ass people. it was really fun. today was a good day. we'll see about tomorrow and thursday.
Monday, February 10, 2003 at 10:35 p.m.
today was awesome. space was good. closeness was better. the discussion and game of LIFE was really good and fun. also very educational in a sense. i went to math today. third day this semester...i am a good student. no class tomorrow, fuck math league! coffee is a pretty good substitute for phillips. speaking of math, i helped monica's sister with math for like half an hour. it was tougher than i thought it would be for an 8th grader. so maybe i am not a good student. good to be back in touch with the whole world...on top of my special world. i feel good. very happy
Monday, February 10, 2003 at 12:18 a.m.
my very awesome cousin stayed with us until this morning for about 4 or 5 days. she's so cute and so smart. she's not even 2 years old and can comprehend jokes and real questions and it amazes me. so does her god awful vocal ability, which she demonstrated this morning at about 9. that's early for me, and i didn't get back to bed. it scares the fuck out of me. everything is getting so close to that infamous breaking point. though this time might be the end of that. i got out of bed and it was amazing. when i hung up i was shook and i still don't know how to feel about it, but i know how i feel about her. the days to follow will be new in an old sense. things will new and improved as they once were. we'll see how that fairs.
Sunday, February 9, 2003 at 12:04 a.m.
today was good. i got to chill with pooja for a while and that was fun. it's been a while since we got to hang out and i missed it more than i knew. the token concert was tonight and i kinda wanted to go. but i also didn't want to make anybody who was sick and too tired to stand up go out tonight. i feel bad cause i didn't want to not go, but i don't know if i would have mattered being present or not. i have worked a lot of important things out and many things have been said and it all seems better. tomorrow i might go to sunday school, but i dunno for sure.
Friday, February 7, 2003 at 11:42 p.m.
so. life is very interesting when you are tired. things seem so much bigger and more crucial than reality would have it. you're mind wanders and fucks with how you feel. it makes you feel upset and un-easy. as though life has a problem that needs to be fixed and the world will not work right until you personally solve it. you stress and deep inside you almost panic. you feel a sense of nervous frustration. then right as you are about to run out your house and try and save the world, you come to a realization. with mentally bitch slapping yourself and some strong reassurance from that special little voice that the issue is not to be delt with on your own, you realize you need to just calm down and get some rest. sleep on it and in the morning things will be better. and then it's good
Thursday, February 6, 2003 at 11:18 p.m.
well today was pretty good. not much happened. tomorrow is symposium and God knows i don't know what i am doing. but oh well we will see what happens. tomorrow i get to chill with tasha cause she's awesome. today i got to see 2 friends from way back in the day. ellen morton came to south today during school and it was good to see her. then today at the store i saw katie chesley. both of whom i have known since like 6th or 7th grade. i feel really weird because tomorrow will be the first day in 3 weeks that i don't see monica at all. i don't know what to do. but it's a really good chance to chill with friends who i haven't seen much. unfortunately a lot of them are too busy. that sucks. the token thing is saturday. i'm very glad it's friday tomorrow.
Wednesday, February 5, 2003 at 11:26 p.m.
things are so much calmer now. i dunno how but they are. and everything is good when it's clearer. there's only one left to be confronted. and it is done. you should really see mine and monica's things we made a while back. its pretty cool if you ask me. if you don't think so, don't fuckin' ask.
on a random note, thanx to an amazing bad ass named REID PARHAM i am able to feature an awesome picture of my beautiful gf Monica
Tuesday, February 4, 2003 at 11:10 p.m.
thanx to a select few, i have chilled out and sincerely forgiven. but i have in no way disregaurded it. it still happened and it still was felt. but the ones who were with me are very appreciated.
Tuesday, February 4, 2003 at 06:45 p.m.
fuck you all. i'm not going to bitch out and go on a man hunt for who talked shit. or who said what. i'm not a paranoid fucking asshole. you believe what you want. and ask what you asked. fuck it. that's more than enough to be said. those who didn't question, you mean a lot more to me than you know.
Tuesday, February 4, 2003 at 04:03 p.m.
damn i have a lot of homework. i am behind but i know it's my fault so i don't have anybody else to get mad at. i realized how much homework i have just now, i wish school was over. the next 4 - 6 years could just be done with and i don't think i would bitch about it. but that won't happen. so i will listen to my music late into the night and maybe write an essay. or a rough draft. maybe.
Monday, February 3, 2003 at 11:15 p.m.
well holy shite! i never thought i would see the day this retard page would look decent. thanx to a very special friend/computer geek, my page looks pretty good. j/k. she isnt a geek. but now i have nothing to say. so i am going to go.
Saturday, February 1, 2003 at 12:47 a.m.
so its been a while again. i dunno what all to say right now.
Wednesday, January 15, 2003 at 11:31 p.m.
wow. i guess these live journal things are the way to go now a days. seems like everybody has one. how gay. evn journals have become cliche. thats really stupid. so are certain people. a lot of certain people. fake people who dont have identities. people who say things and dont follow through. people who dont know their limits in very personal situations. people who flaunt things they think they achieved that have already been achieved and set down. very many stupid people. but thats ok. its all goot. god i hate these things.
Thursday, October 31, 2002 at 12:31 a.m.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
holy shit! so uh, i guess i didnt keep up with this too well. oh well. so much to say and so much not able to be said. i saw jack ass. guys i suggest you go. girls i suggest you dont. i also saw the ring recently, thats a damn good movie. i have homework. and need to get more sleep.
Sunday, October 6, 2002 at 11:31 p.m.
so, i don't know if i can do this shit right. and even if i can i don't know that i will. and even if i do i don't know if i will keep it up. so we'll see.
