< Saturday, March 29, 2003 >

The cowboy bebop movie??
hmm... i'm kinda interested cause i like that anime... @ least the first few episodes of it. *sigh* it's just like evangelion, i enjoy the first few eps but when i learned that the story would become quite depressing, i just didn't feel the need to sadden myself by seeing more. Although of what i know (cause i can't avoid spoilers even with the warnings), i don't think that cowboy bebop has that ummm... devasting an ending. Which was why in my optimistic hopefulness, wished that the movie took place after the last ep... but shortly after, i learned it was between some eps. oh well u_u

nope, i'm not sick.. unless a slight sore throat is something i should worry about? *drinks hot water*
so you bought some manga on friday? i went shopping for some clothes that day, and boy is buying pants hard, which explains why i didn't get any. (so i can relate to not fitting in them n_n)



time to take medication @ 03:38 p.m. * * * * * * *< Tuesday, March 25, 2003 >

This past weekend i did try to do some work on my upcoming layout, but it wasn't much. Boy, do layouts take me forever. i don't know how people can make a new one every month or so.

hmm, about what ya said about liking pairings that aren't so popular, I can relate sadly. and i find it strange that so many x fans don't support F+K. There's always a keiichi, kakyou, subaru, and some other character mixed into the fray. So you could say that the x fandom has kinda dulled my excitement by not feeding my mind with lovely stories of the two. Also it's kinda lonely knowing so few who can relate to my perceptions.

and on a more general level, i do find it annoying seeing summaries for interesting stories that don't involve your fav pairings. you could say that i started reading gundam wing stuff cause there's so much more fics and the pairings i like are more popular than poor f+k. although i'm glad that i'm not a fan of gundam wing's most fav heeroxduo pairing, it allows me to skip many a time wasting fic. Cause just like you, i'll give almost any story w/ a favoured pairing a read. i even read stories that have them as a side pairing, skimming for their part ^-^;;.

Although it's too bad that i don't give stories of other pairings much of a chance, afterall i could be missing out on a good plot. But it's really hard to hold my attention without one's favourites. yep i know it's my loss.

oh new x updates are here! I love how kamui looks on the last page when he's realizing his deeper wish. i wonder what it is??... unfortunately i have to wait 2 months V~V. Oh and the colour illustration is kinda neat, when i see that cat i think it's fuuma. just look @ it's golden eyes and smug smile, it's expression is so human in comparison to the big cats that i saw in an old fuuma pic. yeah kamui, hug that sleek cat!!

Oh and thanks for the chocolates kuu!!



time to take medication @ 10:03 p.m. * * * * * * *< Saturday, March 22, 2003 >

observations of fanfic writing
though i'm not a writer myself and so may know far less than most on the art of the written word, when reading other's fics i find that they are often of two styles: immature and abstract; though despite how i named them, i tend to prefer the immature style. but honestly, when reading a story i wish for a median between the two, yet so few fics seem to strike this median within me.

In my mind the immature style can be divided further into areas such as sappy and trashy.
maybe i should make clear that i'm really referring to romantic fiction ^_^.
Yet the abstract style tends to irritate me more. Though writers of this style feel that they are creating a superior story to sap&trash, it is often enough not so. Though technically superior (in terms of grammer, vocabulary, description) i feel that these writers fail to get to the heart of the matter. Speaking of emotions in a flowery manner sometimes lacks the strength of simple words. This is very hard for me to explain (especially through writing which i have trouble with) but what i'm trying to say is that i'm annoyed by the "oh sigh" feeling that these stories tend to have.
The characters state their inner torment outloud to no one...they sigh... they look out the window and see the falling rain and the...blah, blah, blah. I suppose these moments of self pity and reflection are true to how people are in life, yet as a reader i feel tired reading this. Nothing tends to happen and a lot of attention is spent by the writer on how the person looks so miserable, where and how their tears fall. it's kinda an empty piece of work like that. And going back to the flowery words, these stories tend to have the characters say things so very poetically. But its not really poetry, to me its a string of many words that makes it complicated to understand what is meant by it all.

Back to sappy and trashy. I don't mind sap, though i wish that the stories weren't all about how perfect the other looks under the moonlight. I guess the sap i like is the kind that happens after a difficult hurdle in the relationship. Trashy is horrible stuff though, and by trashy i mean that the romance is cheap (could say more w/ examples but won't). The immature style is obviously weak, but is better than abstract cause at least there could be some interesting melodrama, no matter how ridiculous.
I suppose that my median are stories that are very elegant to me. They explain the situation and the thoughts of the character simply; describing what should be noted and in words that are lovely and meaningful.

Ha ha!! not sure why i wanted to write this other than cause it's what i think. Although i am tempted to delete this ///_^;;



time to take medication @ 01:52 a.m. * * * * * * *< Tuesday, March 18, 2003 >


What Anime Stereotype Are You?



time to take medication @ 09:22 a.m. * * * * * * *< Wednesday, March 12, 2003 >

had some Qoo, kuu and it tastes pretty good. What flavours have you tried and which do you recommend?? You never told me if you drank the one i gave you v_V. The one i just got is Pinku Peach and it says Birthday Special *wonders if it's a limited flavour like green tea pocky* and it's in a bottle. Yesh i'm a little copy-cat cause i want to use it to bring a drink from home with me like you do (i wanna put juice in it). The bottle's pretty cute, it's pink and has Qoo wearing a party hat.



time to take medication @ 08:09 p.m. * * * * * * *< Saturday, March 8, 2003 >

posting a quiz result:

You are blue. You are somewhat innocent, in the fact that your genius only extends to the physical world. You have a false sense of contentness. You are usually the quiet one, the genius. Everyone can count on you to help when they have problems, but you only fall short of being able to solve your own.

What inner color are you?

Tee hee!! i actually like this picture... cause here miki is making the right choice. Yes i much prefer him having a crush on Utena (just like he did in the comics) than *shudder* that horrible, horrible anthy.

[inserting mini rant]
I don't really like anthy >-< and it's not her passiveness that annoys me, its just that she gives me the creeps. yesh, miki deserves better than that and how sad that he pursued her so in the anime.

and on a side note: suki dakara suki seems like a nice manga

just thinking...
i was reading some people's blogs and a theory about kamui's true wish came up. that in the tradition of others wishes (i.e. Nataku, Seishirou, Subaru) kamui's wish is to die. maybe as a sacrifice thing to bring fuuma back.

after thinking about it, it does relate back to the "who would you want to be happy even if it meant you're own suffering?" question that his mother asked him long ago. Also when kakyou said that bringing fuuma back would lead to suffering, it could mean that the world would become doomed without their saviour and this ties into what subaru said about how you can't make everyone happy. kakyou also said that kamui could bring fuuma back with the shinken, could it mean using the shinken to kill himself? It could also answer why fuuma is so eager to kill kamui, cause you know that fuuma loves to grant wishes... especially if it's kamui's.

hee hee, but all that aside i don't actually think dying is kamui's wish, (i'm hoping it's something unlike anyone else's) even if it kinda fits some of the clues that's been tossed out to readers. if he wish were to come true it'd be predictable since i've heard fuuma and now hinoto going blah blah about his bloody end. Also it'd be kinda boring to have the same "i want to die" sentiment... but it certainly fits in with fuuma's "wishing to live is a rarity in japan" comment.

i hope that kamui's wish is a selfish one. i remember reading someone saying that kamui should suck it up, accept that the fuuma he knew is gone and proceed to save humanity for the better good.
somehow this doesn't sit right with me. it's true that "the good of the many outweighs the good of the few or the one" (ala star trek 2: the wrath of khan) and yet it isn't. It doesn't seem fair that one must suffer and give up the one thing that matters most so that others can enjoy life. Sure putting oneself before others is noble but no one should live a miserable existence soley for others' sake, that person deserves to be happy too.

I think CLAMP believes this is the case as well, cause i remember reading so in an interview article, i think ^ ^;;. I mean i'm pretty sure i did... but even if i dreamt that up it seems that magic knight rayearth hints @ this idea.

you know this brings to mind how i have continually felt that fuuma is so much like zagato. and i don't mean how they both look good but in how they may appear to be evil but actually have secretly kept good intentions. At least this is what i hope for. i'd be great for fuuma to be vindicated and so prove that he isn't this one dimensional sadist that too many people portray him as. Not to mention that it would make his being the Sun tarot card most fitting.



time to take medication @ 03:19 p.m. * * * * * * *< Sunday, March 2, 2003 >

Month of March
Yes you're right, i haven't blogged for awhile, and in addition i haven't done much work on my upcoming layout like i planned so... no layout change
(yep, i know i begin every monthly entry this way)

April Asuka
It seems that this issue doesn't shed new light on the mysteries of X. Although it did confirm that bringing fuuma back isn't kamui's true wish... v_v (sniff). That said i still hope that the true wish is fuuma related, but how could it be?? i've read others' theories and sadly i don't have any of my own.
Please CLAMP!! i beg of you, don't make kamui's special person Subaru. It would royally suck, i'm sure even SxK fans would agree to that. for if such a thing were true, CLAMP could of done this SxK romantic twist a whole lot better.

X thoughts
i've been reading other blogs and it seems there's been some wonderings about whether x will end at #19. It would be horrible if CLAMP were to cram all that stills needs to be resolved in the next few asuka issues.
But *_* (starry eyed) it can't end just yet cause even though fuuma and kamui are fighting, the final battle HAS to be @ Tokyo Tower. And judging by the low altitude (checks asuka pics to verify... sees lamp posts) they aren't there just yet.
Speaking of fuuma and kamui duking it out, what's with fuuma and his sudden consideration of personal space *tsk tsk* that will not do. Yep, i know the last time they fought was way back in #15. But now they're together so why waste time getting reacquainted, let play time resume!! Hmmm... maybe it's because there's an audience around. *nods head* that's gotta be it. *mentally shoos away seals... and former seal, that's right u too subaru*

in addition: i fixed the font size. so if the page is viewed w/ the text size setting at medium, it'll look the way i see it (which i've just been informed is still kinda big... but me likey the arial so that's just how it goes... wouldn't want it too small rite?)



time to take medication @ 08:32 a.m. * * * * * * *