ah. a week has gone by..
can't remember alot of things that happened..
lex and i went to jason's house the other night. saturday i think. that was alright, a bit weird.. we left there and went to brian's but that was a small lil kickback so we ended up playing checkers. lol.
the week of school.. a little trippy i guess, with the schedule. but i'm getting used to it.. slowly.
friday night was the back-to-school dance. that was pretty damn fun. i don't know if it's because we're seniors and we dominated the dance (not by # of people, but for uh. just cuz we're seniors) or some other reason but it was good. the theme was "highlight the night".. basically we were supposed to wear white bc there was a big ass black light (ultra violet light?) in the lobby of the activity center.. so we were "highlighted" lol. in blue/violet. aww it was a cute theme. lex, ash and i bought white wifebeaters and black fabric belts. we decorated the shirts with the year '04 (class of 04!!) and the word senior on the back. it was pretty damn cool. they were wearing white pants and i had jeans on, so i put the fabric belt thingy around my neck, so i ended up looking like avril lavigne. not even on purpose! lol. oh well. it was a good dance, the sound system wasn't that fantastic bc one kept giving out. it was horribly HOT HOT HOT in there however, that part kinda sucked, but unvoidable. oh well.
anyway as i write this, i am overwhelmed with a groggy/hazed and far away feeling. why? because um. okay here goes. i guess i ate something wrong, bc it triggered off something in my body, and so i'm allergic to whatever i ate (not even sure what!) and i've been breaking out in hives since yesterday. friggin rash, it's so itchy and i feel like a leper. i've been taking an antihistamine, which stops the reaction from occuring, but it makes me really drowsy and groggy. i was sitting on my bed just now just staring off into space... lol like i'm high off something. weird feeling. i just feel faraway from my body..
oh well.
i'll hurry up and finish this asap. k my mom got home yesterday, i hadn't seen her for like a month and a half, so i'm glad she's home. she brought back stuff from singapore for me. heres what i got: a pair of 3/4 camo print capris (very cool, i like this alot), an army green plain stretchy tshirt, escada ibiza hippie perfume (this smells so good, and like. yummy. lol) and a CD case.. that matches my car. haha :) yay for new stuff!
then today we went shopping. (after slathering calamine lotion all over myself so i wouldn't look like that much of a freak with red, raised welts all over my arms and legs. (EW!).. well i ended up using my charlotte russe gift card, so i bought 2 pairs of shoes and a pair of sunglasses. the shoes are both khaki colored, and very cute. one's like the new style mary janes for school, and the other pair are slip on suede chunky things. yep and the sunglasses are like my other pair that broke, so i got them again, but they're a brown tint to the lenses, instead of the j.lo lookin clear tint ones. but that's fine by me.
i also got myself 2 new bikinis. they were on sale!!! i love sales. haha. one's brown with orange flowers and the other is white and bright blue print. yep.
yeah so i spent quite a bit of money today and i feel a little guilty. but i'll put them all to good use so yep.
i'm off to bed.

oh yeah. i was thinking about this yesterday and last night.
...
i think boys think i am intimidating.
i don't mean to be, and i don't really want to be, and it's not i'm trying to be all aloof, and "mysterious" and all. i don't want to play mind games or whatever it is..
:(
lexi says i'm just too laid back.
i think i'm just a problematic person.
urgh. the story of my life.

otay.
my first day of school wasn't that bad. on a scale of 1-10, i would give it a 7.
kay. i got up at 6 (with some difficulty..) and got ready. put on that school uniform once again. i really didn't miss those damn skirts. i never really used to have a problem with their length, but after being on a miniskirt kick lately, MAN my uniform skirt is REALLY LONG! lol. i never realized that till yesterday! well i guess the only good thing about the uniform is the variety.. like the different shirts (white or blue, oxford or polo, long sleeved, short sleeved, etc) and then the sweatshirts (not now though, too hot!) and yeah.. almost any shoes, etc etc... well. one more year of this BS and i'm done.
so yeah ash got dropped off and one of her friends (well, i know her too) needed a ride too, so she came along, and i got lexi, and then i drove us to school. yep. SCHOOL :(
met someone at 7.30 to buy a book from, socialized a bit, said hay to alot of people..
8am.. homeroom. well being in ms. lopez's homeroom shouldn't be that bad. and she doesn't seem to have a grudge against me for dropping her studio art class, so that's good, eh? i have a lot of cool people with me, so that makes my groggy mornings a bit better. april and i sit next to each other!!!! that's way cool, and her hair is so cute in a bob! haha. i also have, moe, julie, alyssa, and aly (the girls), and hana and jess (shu!maker) :) that's a GOOD homeroom for ya. heh. and ashley was on announcements!!! :) i was like YAY ASH!!!! haha :)
first class.. psychology AP.. LIKE WHOA. that class is gonna be really GOOD. i just know it. ms GP sounds like a great teacher, and i'm gonna learn alot about behavior of all sorts and thats exciting. "an examined life is a life worth living."- socrates. WORD!
on to philosophy.. mr. D once again. aka pharoah of the 2nd floor. haha in his freezing room. i hope that class is gonna be good. i think my psych and philosophy classes might go hand in hand. or not. we'll see. oh and i sit relatively near puney (lexi richter)!!!!!! yay!
(oh, btw, got homework in both those classes..)
third class.. honors physics. OMG. mr wyman cracks me up! i love that man! he is so funny and quirky.. lol i think this is one of those classes that i reeeeeeeally like the teacher, but i reeeeeeeeally hate the subject. lol physics.. it clicks to some, and it doesn't for others. shit, i hope i can handle that class, i have ALOT of smart people in there, and i wonder if i can keep up. but i got tickle, leia and britt in there! haha i was like YAY!.
throw in a 15 minute break, and i caught up with my buddies.. "the group", after fighting a war with my new locker. SHITTT. i got an outside locker. )(@$^)(&#)@(*!@_ it's so far away from all my classes, and i have to fight my way through a HOARD of freshmen to get there.. and not only that, the combination lock i have.. SUCKS!!!!!!!!! it took me 4 tries to get it open. damn. i'm gonna go scouting for a new locker next week, and hopefully mr. vansickle will let me have it.
k. next class.. math. i have a major gripe about this class. let me explain. my teacher is ms. schreiber, who is actually one of the teachers that gives out so many detentions, she keeps the dean in her job. she instills a sense of fear in her students bc all of us are probably gonna get some sort of detention from her, be it being out-of-uniform, saying the word "sucks" and what not. not only that. she was one of the junior student council moderators last year, so ive worked with her before. then you know how i got kicked off? yeah. well yeah so i have that kind of a "bad" history with her. well. if that's not bad enough, you know the girl who GOT me in trouble last year for the whole "cheating" deal.. haha YEAH. she sits behind me. AGAIN. I HATE SITTING IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER. ....... so, i'm in schreiber's math class, the woman who single handedly gives out 70% of the detentions the dean approves, and not only that .. that girl sits behind me. AGAIN. i mean no offense but i want nothing to do with her. that is truly unfortunate. but i know for sure i am never turning around to talk to her. i'm too scared.
after finding out that bad news, i headed over to english. mr. conway's class. let me find some words to describe this man. a self proclaimed disorganized man, who has taught this class for a long time, but yet you KNOW he is incredibly BRILLIANT, but yet seems kinda grandfatherly at the same time! and i guess you can say one of my favorite subjects is english (even though i don't really think about that much, or i don't like to admit it), i think i'll like this class. :) i'm glad.
.. on to.. visual arts 1. computer class. i am 1 of 5 seniors in this class, the rest are juniors and sophomores. but, i think this class is goin to be a waste of time, and i am reaaally regretting picking this class. the teacher ms gibbons is gonna teach us like. BASICS. i mean, given, its an imac, but she's like teaching us how to TYPE (aka keyboarding), use basic programs and all that jazz!. and i am incredibly disappointed because i know this class is just going to be a waste of time, and energy, and money of course. i'm seriously kicking myself in the ass for not taking architecture. because that's of course a lot more interesting, and just.. not a waste. i hate KNOWING i'll be wasting my time.
last class. (hang in there!) computer presentations and graphic design.. yeah another computer class. um. what can i say? ms boehm (pronounced BAY-M) seems pretty frickin cool, and we get the reserved souped up imacs. we're gonna be using photoshop and learning about all the funky shit we can do with photoshop, messing around with all kinds of graphics, imovie (video editing!!), digital pictures, etc etc. this class is gonna be ALOT of fun for me. and definitely NOT a waste of time. how exciting! and not only that, ive got ms katy powers with me (me: "POWERS!" her:" HOLLY LIM! NI HAO MA?"..yeah i taught her some chinese, she loves it), this class is gonna kick ass. ;) yeah!
so basically that is the low down on all my classes. a basic run through, and now you know what i will be suffering through each day. with the new schedule style being implemented, the calendar/handbook is going to be my best friend. our funky ass rotating, non rotating schedule. all i can say is that after lunch, i'll be stuck in the computer room, so basically that's not too shabby.. :)
i'm a little sad because i don't have ashley or lexi in any of my classes, and they have classes together (like ARCHITECTURE!!. *kicks self*) but yeah, what can you do?
school school. i hate it, but i love it. i'm so weird.
as a random note, i have the BIGGEST, NASTIEST bruise on my leg!!! it's like on the side of my knee (right leg, left side of knee) and when i stand up, and look at my legs, i can't see it. so i never noticed it was there. and yesterday, i was in the shower, and was shaving my legs and SHAZAAAM!!!!!!! i see the bruise and its like. all nasty lookin and i'm like .. whoa... it's hideous. i don't know how i got it and i'm pretty sure alot of people saw it as i was walking around school. LOL. oh well. i didn't know it was there. kay. end random note.
to top off this super long ass entry... lex, ash and i went to TG's house last night. he had a few people over. so we went and yeah, had pizza, soda and catching up with TG, scott, and jon.. not the most exciting thing but better than staying home and doing homework. TG has the coolest bed ever. i could have snuggled up and fallen alseep last night if not for that LIZARD thing they were throwing around the whole place. lol. amazing how we can make a lizard thingy into one huge dirty joke. violations, violations galore. i was really tired though and i just wanted to sleep. i dropped the girls home for the second time that day and headed home.
and i hit the hay. and woke up at 1pm today. :)

audio:: yellowcard- "view from heaven" (I SWEAR I WILL BUY THIS CD!!!!!!!)

k. monday i worked on my packets a little more, my goal was to finish the savings plan one and do as much as possible too. my brother wanted to go to the mall to look around, and so he was like "finish your homework by today, then we can go!!!".. turns out we didn't go to the mall. lol. anyway that night jake (the guy ashley likes.. and he likes her back :) perfect) invited us to his friends house because they were skateboarding around, and "IT WAS SICK!!!!"... uh. so we go. got a bit lost, the directions we were given weren't that great. well. turns out his friend has emptied out his pool and so its just the pool, no water. and they were spray painting the inside.. "tagging", and skateboarding around inside. we "tagged" small little things each and just sat around talking i guess. it's not what i expected, but oh well, i would have been better off doing my homework at home.
ho hum. tuesday.. I FINISHED ALL MY SUMMER PACKET HOMEWORK!!!!!!! and i mean i finished everything! both the arizona history/government one, and the economics one. i'm so proud. i did the essays, the budget, savings plan and college costs essays, EVERYTHING. :) woohoo! and once again, my brother wanted to go to the mall, but i was still working on my HW, so he just went with travis. so i spent my last minutes of my summer vacation at home, watching some tv.
wednesday. i got up at 10, got ready and headed over to school. it was the freshman orientation ive been bitching about for a while, ya know? yeah so heres the story. in the big sister/little sister program that i am part of, that requires me to attend this freshman orientation, i have been assigned two little sisters. one of which i have met, the other i have not. well. i called both of them on like monday and tuesday to speak to them and all, and both don't pick up to my calls. so i'm like. screw that! lol. anyway i meet up with murphy (she also goes by leigh) yesterday and she's the one i already know, and she's cool and everything, so thats good. but since the other has not picked up to my calls, i don't know who she is, what she looks like or anything. so i guess she was walking around yesterday without a big sister. i felt quite bad, but i mean, i dont know who she is! if not i would have gone to meet her, ya know? *sigh* oh well. :( ...i got flowers for them, but i wasted some money by buying cassandra (the other little sister) some.. they died, and i couldn't find her. :( i got my ID done, that was a good thing. the picture is a bit funky lol but oh well. afterwards, i met up with ashley and we went over to lexi's house to surprise her :) hehe that was fun, we stayed and chatted for a while, and later i dropped ash home and came home. then i went with my brother to my cousin's 7th grade orientation. i felt a bit weird, bc people were giving me strange looks. probably because my brother and i looked like we were the young parents of a 12 year old kid. LOLOLOL. or they thought i was gonna be a 7th grader. lol. noo, i'm a 12th grader, DAMMIT!.lol. anyway i went to sleep early bc of school the next day (today).
so yeah. today. i got up at 6am, got ready, ash got dropped off, i got lex and we went to school. to get my parking pass. i am #35. not bad, i got there half an hour before the opening time too. then i went scouting around for the books i needed. i wanted most of my books used because i don't like to buy my books brand new since theyre so frickin expensive! i managed to make a few calls and got the books i needed. so that was kinda successful. but i feel really bad for leaving ashley alone with selling the other books.. :( there weren't that many graduated seniors who came back to sell, and that sucks! argh. i'll drag myself out of bed next year and go back and sell some books .. lol.i will!.
also, april gave me my realllly belated birthday gift, which was makeup from victoria's secret, the eyeshadow is so pretty, and i love it!!!! i got a black eyeliner (already got one from ash and lex, remember? but i don't mind, can never have too much makeup) and a "transforming eye color quad".. yep. it's gorgeous and has 4 iridescent colors, and they "transform" into colored eyeliner when swiped over regular black eyeliner! pretty frickin awesome, in my opinion (IMO).. :) thanks apey!
it was so HOT AND HUMID TODAY!!!!! omg we were all DYING. it was horrible. we went over to AJ's and got ourselves some food and drinks and then i dropped lex and ash home.
then i came home. and my brother wanted to go to the mall (again). so i was like "let's go" and then he said he didn't feel like it. LOL gah. so i just sat on my bed for a bit. i was so tired! and before i knew it, i was fast asleep. lol. damn school tires me out. so i took like a 3 hour nap. and then i took my cousin so learning center (routine routine, it gets boring)....picked him up again..
now my bro and cousin have gone to get dinner. it's gonna storm tonight. and theres something going on about a huge ass black out in some states. i hope it doesn't hit arizona.
tomorrow. school officially starts. i have to wear my school uniform, carry my backpack full of books and go to classes. UGH. that sucks ass. major ass. i'm not looking forward to it at all, and since the school decided to dick us over this year, we have more classes, and a longer school day. yeah and tomorrow we have to go through every class and they're prolly gonna give homework already. AAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!! the horror, the horror!!!!
anyway i'm just glad i'm done with my summer homework. alot of girls aren't done yet, quite a large number, actually. so i'm pretty happy that i'm finished with em. i actually didn't procrastinate too much with them. be proud!
i'm off like a prom dress.
(whoa. haha someone said that to me the other night)

audio:: yellowcard- "way away" (HOT DAMN, i hafta go buy their new CD, the songs are SO GOOD! haha man i love this band.)

so my dad left early this morning.
sometimes i just wish my whole family could be together all the time, instead of my mom working in san francisco. sometimes i wonder how she does it, flying back and forth all the time. i doubt i could do that. and my dad, sometimes we get into arguments and he's yelling at people and everything, but all in all, he IS my dad, right?
i guess the point i'm trying to make is, treasure your parents. i may not all the time, but i'm making an effort. well my cousins daphne and daniel are gonna lose their mom sometime soon (my aunt.. the one my dad has gone to see), and i can only imagine how sucky it must be to know that your days are numbered...
okay, enough depressing thoughts. i was just musing, again.
actually, i feel really.. HUNGRY. lol. theres nothing to eat in this house, i might drag my brother and cousin with me to the nearest safeway or something and do some grocery shopping. lol.
well. i'm writing this, because i'm taking a break from my economics savings plan project. it's really tedious and really stupid. and i just want to complete it soon.
school starts this wednesday. not an official start, but i have to go back for the freshman orientation (that ive bitched about in a previous entry). and i need to call my little sisters up.. cuz i'm in the big sister program, eh. k. if i remember correctly, their names are leigh and cassandra. i've met leigh and shes pretty cool for an incoming freshman. i didnt get to meet the other, she never picked up to my calls. oh well. anyway. so i'm just dreading the return to school. ugh.
i've added a new link, it's timmy, he finally got himself a blog, so go check it out.
yup, thats all for now.

audio:: incubus- "drive"

lol.
oh my WORD.
guess what now?
my dad is leaving for singapore tomorrow morning.
yup.
why? because his sister (my aunt) is in critical condition, and he needs to see her before anything bad (YA KNOW) happens. he was gonna leave for shanghai, china, next week, and he says he should see her before that, because if my dad brings back any funked up germs with him or whatever to see her, she might be more susceptible to whatever it is. you get my drift?
yes, my "ku ma", my aunt wendy, has cancer, and yeah they said she would live till the end of the year, and well it doesn't look that way anymore.
*sigh* so my dad is off to meet my mom in singapore and then they'll be with my aunt for a bit, then my dad's off to shanghai, then mom will go back to san francisco for work, then she'll be back around the 22nd. and i think my dad should be back by then too.
all this travelling here and there! and none of it is done by me. well i'm just glad my brother will be around this time, so he can handle any ... mishaps with the cousin. good deal.
i was talking to my mom on the phone earlier, and she was getting ready to go to church (ugh time zones) and yeah i need to get to a mall and sniff some fragrances at a department stores, because my mom's gonna buy whatever scent i want, because i guess apparently, its cheaper in sinagpore. lol, that's if i do move my ass and get to mall, eh? any reccomendations? i want something light, fruity or flowery, nothing too empowering. i hear escada ibiza hippie is a pretty popular choice. too bad i dont know what it smells like. haaa.
kay. i still have to complete those damn economics projects, which are really difficult and i'm just a confused kitten over those. eh.
oh yeah. last night ashley and i went over to brian's house, he was having another party. man that kid has parties like every weekend. it was pretty fun, and everyone was like "you're driving again tonight, aren't you?" and i'm like "you know it". lol. met more new people, watched guys play the guitar, helped ashley and shannon build a "beeramid" lol which is, of course, a pyramid of empty beer cans. oh and BTW, it was TOGA party!!! LOL. at first i was like naaaah i don't wanna wear a toga or swath a bedsheet around me! lol but shannon and ash convinced me and yeah. my toga was pink, and ashley's was yellow. (i couldn't find regular white sheets). but yeah, that was pretty fun. toga toga!! once again i was snapping pictures all over the place, and i felt a little bad, because i think i get a little annoying taking pictures all the time. but oh well, all in the name of fun, right? and yeah, we finally caught up with the girls, julie, ali, aly and ashley walman and all. that was nice, to see them again, it's been a while. and we were like SENIOR YEAR IS GONNA BE GREAT!!! haha. :) a fight almost broke out too, but that was stopped, thank god. hmm it was a good party overall. i think. lol.. good times good times. there's more but i can't remember it all. lol.
so yeah, i'm off to help dad pack his stuff, iron his clothes and fold them and all. his shoulder is hurting for some reason and yeah. gotta help the dad!

*muah*

audio:: the wannadies- "you and me song"

:)
i got my webcam up and running again! yay!
here's a stupid picture of me, because this calls for a celebration!

hmm.
yesterday i woke up at like 11.30 and called my school.
i needed to get my schedule changed, to drop my studio art class. i was on the phone with one of the schedule-changer-ladies for like half an hour. turns out in order to drop my class and change my schedule i have to pay 50 bucks.
i told my dad that, and he was like. "whatever makes you happy". and i'm like. *eyes grow big*. i almost flipped out because my dad is never that calm about giving money to the school, because theyre money suckers anyway, and the cost to send me to that school is HORRENDOUS. and i was like holy shiiiat. i was pissed as hell that i ended up with studio art in the first place, and then now i have to pay 50 bucks to CHANGE IT? last year it was 25 bucks, and that was bad enough, and now they jacked it up to 50. UNBELIEVABLE. and with my dad just saying that to me, it made me feel so damn guilty and i half wanted to just say i'll do the art course.
but no. i decided there was no way i could do the art class, i mean for a whole year, with a teacher who hates my guts? i think NOT!
the lady on the phone with me was the dean's daughter. and from previous experiences, the dean is a horrible horrible person and i hate her guts. YOU NEVER WANT TO BE IN A CONFERENCE ROOM WITH HER. trust me! ANYWAY. the dean's daughter works at the school, and she was looking at my schedule, and she goes, "oh yeah you could have gotten executive board student council here".....
DOH!!!!
and it took alot of self control to just say "yeah, well that didn't happen", when i was reeling in my head! i was thinking, "well that very well could have been the case and i guess not, because your mother fucked me over now, didn't she?!?!?!?!?!"
*deep breath* of course it seems more dramatic now when i type it out, but it wasn't that bad. i mean, she didnt have to help me change my schedule either, she could have been like SORRY changes are not allowed, etc etc. so i'm thankful in a way, in a horribly morbid and disappointing way.
well after that i decided i needed to go shopping. my intent was to purchase that skirt i wanted from hollister. i called ashley up and dragged her to desert ridge with me. we went from like shop to shop, just browsing and all, and i got to hollister and they didn't have my size anymore. grr. so i couldn't get the skirt, and i was having second thoughts about it anyway, so now i'm not sure if i want the skirt anymore. lol. oh well i save like 35 bucks if i don't get it. haha YEAH it's an expensive skirt, alright?
oh yeah, i finally popped in the movie Blade II, that we bought, but i never got around to watching. man that movie is so trippy, a bit confusing and those funky NOT-vampire things were creepy as hell, really gruesome looking. lol yeah other than that, it was a really action packed film.
hmm. today i had to go into school to get my new schedule and drop off the $50 check. fifty dolla down the drain all the way to the nunnery. grreat. my schedule is as follows now:

SCHEDULE :
Homeroom: Lopez
First Semester
1. Psychology AP- Grimes Priebe
2. Philosophy- DiStefano
3. Honors Physics- Wyman
4. Honors PreCalculus- Schreiber
5. English IV AP- Mr. Conway
6. Visual Arts 1- Gibbons
7. Computer Presentations and Graphic Design- Boehm

Second Semester
2. Love and the Christian Vocation- Ertl
6. Intro to American Sign Language- Manzella
7. Beginning Ceramics- Fischer

yup. they moved around my english and physics class to get me into Visual Arts 1... which is not an art class mind you, it's a computer class, more of a graphic design one.. on imacs. and then into to sign language.. lol there were no other classes for me to take so i guess i'll deal with those. i'm just glad i have no more studio art.
after getting my schedule changed, and ash picked hers up, we have NO classes together BTW. that sucks ass. anyway we came back to my house and chatted for a bit then we went to sonic because it was HAPPY HOUR! half price slushes!!! woo. haha we got some food and ever favorite strawberry slush and came home. watched minority report and the ending of josie and the pussycats (i love josie's hair!!) and a bit of an episode of friends, ashley's sister came to pick her up. that was nice, because then i wouldn't need to drop her off, not that i minded, but it was nice to just NOT drive once in a while. heh. :)
anyway.. i wanted to work on my econs projects and i asked my dad for help because i have NO idea where to start. i gave him the worksheets to read, and he came back to me with 3 different sets of info he printed out. WHOA. completely over my head. my dad began explaining and i was like. *falls on the floor, spazzing out* my WORD, it's so complicated. ashley tried explaining to me the day before, and that was pretty confusing, and the way ashley did hers and the way my dad explained how he thought i was to do it, were pretty different. i think. yeah. just whoa. i need to get working on this. *crosses fingers and hopes for the best*
and have i ever mentioned i want to torture my cousin?

school is for fools!! LOOK AT MEEE!!!!!!!!! (i quote my friend moe on that one)

audio:: ..hearing my brother and dad argue downstairs because my brother wants to modify his car, by changing his headlights to those bright white/blue ones (which i want to do to my car too!), and my dad says thats gonna mess with the 3 year warranty, since the car is on lease. *sigh* i guess i won't be doing anything to my car anytime soon. lol.

hmm. i have to say i'm a little proud of myself.
yesterday, i completed some assignments for school. i still have some to do, but i got some out of the way. i know i slacked off alot, but hey. who wants to do homework anyway? i'm gonna aim for completing one assignment/essay/project a day now, till i'm done.
let's see.

honors arizona history and government
~100 multiple choice COMPLETED
~political map of arizona COMPLETED
~extended essay: influence on arizona by women COMPLETED
~brief biography: famous people (18 bios) COMPLETED
~the 5 Cs report: climate, copper, cotton, cattle, citrus. COMPLETED

honors economics
~100 multiple choice COMPLETED
~common economic related abbreviations (20 of them) COMPLETED
~monthly budget (budget for 8 weeks, charts and essay)
~college costs (pick 2 colleges and compare all costs, scholarship research plus essay)
~savings plan (1 chart: compounded interest on how much i would be worth at age 70...another chart: another way to get the money.. some deal like that, plus essay)

yeeeep. on top of that 3 books to read. ive already finished 2 of the books. one more to go, and its all poetry. bleah.
i hate school.
anyway. i also got my ass down to doing my laundry and i ironed all my clothes, and i usually leave that to mom, because i'm a lazy slob. but i did it, and that was nice. and then i organized my closet. put away clothes i don't wear anymore and sorted out my drawers of clothes and all. :) it's all organized and everything, i'm proud.
anyway. i'm off to do more essays.

audio:: n.e.r.d- "lapdance"

hmm.
yup, it's been a week now.
tuesday lex, ash and i were supposed to go to alan's for a small kickback party but the wind was so freakin strong, my dad decided that i shouldn't go out. first i was like a whiney brat and was like "but whyyyy?" then i took a step outside and holy shit it was so windy!!! no way was i driving in that windy weather. it was really scary just standing there listening to the wind blow and yeah. whoa. freaky.
i'm trying to recall what i did this week. lol. i can't really remember. i dont think i did anything on wednesday. honestly, i can't remember. lol maybe i didn't do anything that's why i can't remember anything special. lol.
um i know somewhere in there, there was a night where we went for dinner with scott and his buddies. we went and chilled at scott's place for a bit and then went home. um and then also at some point i went with lex and her sister to the mall, we were originally gonna go to the college bookstore to try and pick up our psychology books. but that got changed and we went to the mall. i was dressed in like. nasty clothes and looked horrible, but that was fun, lexi and i freaked a few people out with our crazy laughter. i picked up a new pair of shades, those lightly tinted ones. my old ones broke and i was really sad :( they were really nice (and cheap) oh well. the new ones aren't too bad, but i miss my old ones, they had a really cool slanty shape. ok. yeeah.
anyway. thursday night dave invited us over to his house because he was having this HUUUGE party. ho hum. it wasn't big at all. but it was nice, just some people, met a few people, etc. nothing spectacular. but i have some funny pictures and videos. :) as usual. i'm like the official photographer and videotaper and driver. lol not that i hate my job, but i'm not particularly fond of the driving part anymore. and it's not really a job. okay i should shut up.
um skip to friday. my brother came home! :)
i had gone over to lexi's to drop off some dvds she wanted to borrow and to write some chinese words for her so she could get henna tattoos in mazatlan. yeah i said bye and i wont be seeing her till school starts. i miss my lexi. :( i hope she has a good trip though. :) yay mexico.
anyway. yeah dad went and got my bro from the airport and he came home and unpacked and yeah it's good to have him home. someone i can talk to, make fun off and beat up all at the same time! YAY! we went to desert ridge mall real quick because the hollister store opened and my brother hadn't seen it yet. oh man i saw this skirt i really want. it's a cute short skirt in camo print with a few pleats in the front and a big belt on it. whoa i want it bad. lol. later that night ashley and i went and caught AMERICAN WEDDING! that was such a funny (and rowdy) movie. i love it! haha but i'm always one for movies like that, road trip, american pie, etc yep. yeah go see it, it's good! funny as hell.
um yeah saturday i didn't really do much. we watched this dvd at home.. 8 short films from BMW, all featuring their cars and everything, with professional stunt driver clive owen as the star and everything. we had gotten some mexican food before and yeah. mexican food and BMW short films. a afternoon well spent. we went for dinner later at some chinese style buffet. as i expected, the food wasnt that great. oh well. we went to superK (kmarttt!!) later and i got myself a 1 and 1/4" curling iron. finally! geez ive wanted one that size for so long! now my hair can look pretty and curled. my old 1 and 1/2" was just a little too big. anyway. i got a l'oreal blush delice in raspberry sorbet. which is something else i'd been wanting for a while. so :) i was quite happy with my purchases.
anyway fast forward today (i'll be done soon, i promise!)
i woke my whole family up and we all went to church together (mind you, i haven't gone to church in a long time.) and then we came home and i went and got wendy's salads for us for lunch. then we all hopped into the pool and yeah! it was fun. i haven't been in the pool that long all summer. time passes faster when you're with people. i got a nice tan. more tan than i already am, so that was nice. later we all fell asleep cuz we were so tired from all the swimming. (and making our dog swim too) and then dad decides that he wants a bloody good steak for dinner. so we went to the restaurant Black Angus, and had bloody good steaks for dinner! hehe. yeah, that was good.
later we went and watched tomb raider II :) i'd been wanting to see that since it opened, so i'm glad i did, it was pretty damn good. angelina jolie kicks major ass in the movie, i love it!
okay. wow today has just been a nice family day. :) it was good.
wow i'm tired. i'm off to bed and tomorrow i will try and wake up early to start on some holiday homework assignments.
kay.

audio:: play- "i must not chase the boys"

wowee.
my entry below was really whacked out, huh? i apologize for seeming somewhat off my rocker there. whoa.
anyway. thanks for the comments guys, :) *muah*
as for an update to what's going on, well everything got sorted out, thanks to travis and my family calling my cousin nonstop, ;) seems like a role reversal from the calls i got the week before for the NONEXISTANT party i threw, eh? *grin* well if anything, my parents are on my side again, and they know they can believe me, over my 12 year old cousin, any day. :) yay!
so yep, everything is okay, i made it through the weekend (which was actually pretty damn good, i'll get to that). picked my dad up from the airport today, so he's home, yay!
picked up schedule from school. i finally managed to get it, without any trip ups. im really sad though, i didnt get my photography class, they put me in studio art AP. noooooooo. that's a class i didnt pick, my damn counselor put that down for me "you've been doing art for 3 years now, you should take studio art" me: "NO I DONT WANNA!!!" her: "here lets put you down for it". whaa? well. yeah. i got the class and im upset, i DONT WANT IT.i dont want to be doing art 24/7 next year. the girls who are in the class got a headstart with a packet for summer. and so if im in that class i'll have to do double the work bc i didnt get the summer packet. fuck no, im not taking that class, im gonna try and get it changed.
anyway, heres the schedule.

homeroom: Lopez (the ART TEACHER. *GAG***)
First Semester
1. Psychology AP- Grimes Priebe
2. Philosophy- DiStefano
3. Studio Art AP- Lopez (:C)
4. Honors PreCalculus- Schreiber
5. Honors Physics- Wyman
6. English IV AP- Conway (Mr.)
7. Computer Presentations and Graphic Design- Boehm

Second Semester
(most remain the same, the only ones that change are:)
2. Love and the Christian Vocation- Ertl
7. Beginning Ceramics- Fischer

yup, there ya go. my computer class and ceramics class will prolly help me keep going through the year. yay for fun electives. i just gotta change the studio art. :(:(:(:(
hmm. ok. what did i do on the weekend.
oh. haha right. party at brian's on saturday. that was pretty fun. it was nick's birthday as well. THAT was eventful. lex and ash ya know what i mean. i got a little snap happy with my camera, lol and i blinded quite a few people with the flash, but hey. i got the pics. haha. :) yup lex and ash kept running off together for god knows what reasons, and so i was left on my own for a while here and there. but nothing bad. s'all good. k. that's all i'll say.
sunday.. trav brought THE REAL CANCUN over and lex and ash came over for movie night. hahaha omg thats such a great party movie. makes me wanna go on spring break RIGHT NOW RIGHT NOW!!!!! dayum. i gotta go to cancun. haha
alrighty. i gotta burn a buncha cds for people. lex wants some to take on her holiday to mazatlan, trav wants the soundtrack to cancun and so do i. and i dunno. haha. k. :)
LATER FOOLZ! *lol*

audio:: Ok Go- "You're so Damn Hot"

yeah.
well my day got worse after that.
my dad called and i explained to him what had happened, and he yelled at the kid. and then the kid got angry i guess. i came downstairs, and he was holding the phone in his hand and the thing is, he wasn't on the phone with anyone. he was just holding the phone up to his ear for nothing. and i asked him why and he said because he felt like it and he was going to continue doing so until he was happy. and i was like WTF what about people trying to call the house? and he's like i dont care. and then i said I CARE! if people are trying to call the house i mean CMON. not to mention he was holding a pair of scissors in his hand as if he was going to kill himself or something. i was sorely tempted to tell him to do it. but he's too much of a coward to do so, and he knows it, and so do i. i can't remember everything in detail but i think he got on his computer (without permission) and talked to his dad online and told him to call. so im like sitting in my room, extremely frustrated. and his father called, and i picked up and i told him to please talk some sense into the kid, because i'm really tired of dealing with it. and i call the kid to the phone and instead of using the phone downstairs (which is where he was anyway) he comes up the stairs and insists on using the cordless. and im like no use the phone downstairs. then he says. no i want to use that phone. and i was like NO. and the kid's like ok then i dont want to talk. and i was getting reeeeeeally pissed here. and i knew his dad could hear everything i was saying. so i said really loudly. "OK TAKE THE FUCKING PHONE!!!!!!!!!!" and i gave him the phone and yep. that was the last straw. i absolutely cannot handle the child. he is 12 years old. i am 17. i am not ready to be taking care of a kid. i suck at it. im not good as an authority figure. the kid doesnt look up to me and respect me. maybe because hes fatter and bigger sized than i am and i don't intimidate him or whatever. im not cut out for taking care of the kid. it was horrible. i was crying in my room on the phone and like my mom and bro and dad are calling. katie's on my cellphone with me trying to calm me down. lexi is trying to call the house and my cellphone and no ones picking up cuz the kids on the house phone with his dad and im talking to katie. grr. and lexi ends up coming to my house. and im so frickin frustrated at this point i cant even speak and im like. crying in my room. i hate the kid i really do. and lexi talks to the boy and tries to hold a mini group session therapy thing. it kinda worked, my family was calling ryan and talking to him and all. and argh. i dont even know where i'm going with this. well i was supposed to go out with lexi and ash and all for a movie night, we were gonna see pirates of the caribbean. well my family decides that i can't go out because of what the kid might do to the house and himself if i am gone. he might slash the tires, he might do something to the dog, he might blow the house up, do something to the cars i dont know! so basically i was basically under house arrest looking after the mentally deranged child that WAS under house arrest. not that he was smart enough to go anywhere. i ended up calling travis cuz i didnt know what else to do and he came over and sorted things out. lexi went to go meet ash for the movie b/c i didnt want them to miss out just because i have a sick demented child for a cousin. argh
travis sorted everything out, and we went to blockbuster and rented some movies and got some dinner. which altogether seemed like a reward to the kid, huh? ugh. i miss my brother and my mom and my dad and i want them home and argh i hate dealing with the child. and i know this entry is just all jumbled up and all but i just dont know. i wish i could have gone out tonight instead of staying home and dealing with this shit. i wish he had never come to stay here and i wish he would just go back to singapore and leave me alone. im sick and tired of taking care of someone who is so ungrateful. i can't even remember what i want to say. all i want from the kid is for him to study and be honest with me and he can't even do that.
i'm too damn young to be a parent.
i'm not even a parent! he's my frickin cousin for crying out loud.
i need to thank katie for helping me on the phone, and for her listening to me vent about the kid. i need to thank my brother for trying to calm me down and being nice to me even though i was really mean to him over the last few days because i was still angry with him. i want to thank my mom and dad for being there. i also want to thank lexi for coming to my house and preventing me from beating the living daylights out of the kid (and believe me, i was ready!) . and i want to thank travis for coming over and helping me deal. the reason why i type this, is because i am very grateful for their help and i never got to thank them. and YES ALL THIS HAPPENED TODAY!.
DAMMIT.
TODAY HAS SUCKED ASS! MAJORLY!
im sorry if this entry isnt making sense, i just needed to get this OUT! i can't even think straight anymore.
i wish i had someone with me here right now. i need some company. i can't stand this alone. :( i'm going to my room. i'm done.

okay whoa, it's still early in the day, but DAMN. it's already eventful. lol.
woke up at 10.30am which is like frickin early for me. took dad to the airport, he's probably already in san francisco by now.
on the way home, i went over to my school, to drop off my school fees, and pick up my schedule. well. did i get the schedule? NO. wanna know why? because my dad postmarked the check for the 28th, and today is the 25th, and the bloody school doesn't take postmarked checks. so i'm standing there in the finance office, and the schedules are sitting right there, an arm's length away. but, i can't get mine because the school has a rule about postmarked checks. !@_$&!$_)$(*#_)&#%_)#&$_!#)($_)$@)($*@)!!!!!!!!!!!
as i was walking out of the building, i muttered "fuckers", and i think the lady heard me. but you know what? too damn bad if she did.
i was cussing most of the way home. school is like a 20 minute drive from my house. and now i have to drive all the way back on the 28th. i had a torrent of swear words and chinese swear words just tumbling from my mouth. not pretty. so much for wanting to cut down on cussing. argh. i was PISSED. I HATE MY SCHOOL SO MUCH!!!!!!!!
*deep breath*
ok. well. my dermatologist appointment was at 3pm. i left early, so i wouldn't be late. well. i was in there for 10-15 minutes max, and paid 15 bucks co-pay to be told my doctor that my face looks fine. bullshit. BULLSHIT. gah. if my face looked fine, i wouldnt NEED to see a dermatologist. effin piece of shiat.
*another deep breath*
alright. so it's my cousin and me alone at home again right? because dad just left for out-of-town again. well. i guess my cousin didn't expect me to be gone for only half an hour for my derm. appointment. so when i came home, i smelt the distinct smell of SHRIMP FLAVORED RAMEN. (not a personal favorite flavor, i prefer the regular ol' chikin! heh). and the telly wasn't turned off properly. this is where holly gets suspicious. well. turns out my cousin has been sneaking food off, and i caught him in the act. basically. and he was watching tv as well. lol. he was supposed to be studying in his room. haha well. he was lying like.
me: what's that smell?
him: i dont know.
me: that smells like cup noodles. did you eat any?
him: no.
me: really?
him: that was yesterday.
me: there's half eaten cup noodles in the trash, as well as a metal fork. can you tell me what that's doing there?
him: that was yesterday, i forgot to take the fork out.
me: DAMMIT RYAN QUIT LYING TO ME. I FRICKIN KNOW YOU'RE LYING!!!! HOW CAN THERE BE THE SMELL OF SHRIMP NOODLES IN THE HOUSE STILL WHEN YOU ATE IT YESTERDAY? FURTHERMORE, YOU CAN'T HAVE EATEN IT YESTERDAY, DAD WAS HOME ALL OF YESTERDAY. AND WHY WOULD YOU THROW AWAY A FRICKIN METAL FORK?!?!?!??!!? (yeah, okay i flew off the handle).
*inhale exhale inhale exhale*
i hate liars. i despise and loathe liars. well. chronic liars, if you know what i mean. the kid thinks he can lie to me, and i mean c'mon, if you're gonna have to be smart about it, and if i leave and come home to the tv on, and he's sitting there on the couch saying he's finished his work for the day (which he had not) and with the unmistakable smell of shrimp crap. well. DOH. it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out. and not only that i hate that smell. dammit i have a headache from it now. ARGH THE KID GETS ON MY NERVES!!!!!!!!!! dadddd why did you have to leave him here with meeeee?????
okay okay i know i'm whining. but the kid's on a diet and hate studying. if it was me, i'd rebel too. but dammit. whyyy does it irk me so much?
gah. frickin A double frickin.

audio:: MxPx- "Responsibility"

oh. i forgot to mention, i got bored one night and whipped out the scissors and cut a few layers in my hair. i wanted a few shorter pieces in front. :) they look really cute when they're curled under, but really, i dont have the patience to do that all the time, and besides, ive got no one to impress.
ah. and i thought this was nifty.


LOVE is your chinese symbol!

What Chinese Symbol Are You?
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yay!

holla!
first off i'd like to say thanks for the concern guys, it's much appreciated. i just had a shitty week and it's all good now. not sticking around long in one spot if not i'll start all the deep thought things again! haha i guess i'm proof that thinking can go bad, eh? oh well. but thanks anyways! BIG *MUAH* FOR Y'ALL!
hah. well the week started off with me feeling like shit bc i was thinking and over analysing too much. then later the shit hit the fan when my family somehow went nuts on me and thought i was throwing a party at the house, since they were all away. haaah. YEAH RIGHT. the last thing i will ever do is throw a party. i HATE cleaning up after people, and who knows who would have shown up, for goodness sakes. ANYWAY. i guess my cousin came up with some dumb story about that or something and told them? and so they were calling me non stop for like 3 days and yelling at me on the phone and making me cry and the whole nine yards, GAH bullshit. it was horrible. they even sent travis over here to check on me. i was so pissed at the point i just left the house and went out. it was HORRIBLE. i got into trouble for something i DIDNT do. AGAIN!. what the frick.
anyway thats been cleared up, pretty much, my close friends know what happened exactly, but i dont feel like talking about it, i might end up crying again. my mom thinks i have an attitude problem, and my brother said that if i piss him off he'll get my parents to take my car away. or slash my tires. its disgusting how mean they were. :( nevermind. its over.
anyway. i've been out and about, mostly. didnt really feel like staying home in fear that the family will think i'm up to something. dad was the only cool one about it, i think he thought mom and bro were over-reacting also, so thats good.
friday night: party at brian's. met him, he's a nice guy, friend of larky's.
saturday night: bailie's 18th birthday party! woo! haha went all the way to rocio's house, in the boonies, aka really far away. that was quite fun. :) happy birthday bailie!!!! :) ash stayed the night cuz we got back super late. heh. lexi- ;) would you like me if i kept hitting you with pillows? or wanted to come to your house at 3 in the morning? *GRIN* haha, inside joke.
hmm. monday i called travis and apologized for my behavior and being rude to him on friday night. he accepted my apology and we went to watch bad boys 2 on tuesday night. its a good movie, long and very action packed. i had a bit of a hard time following the storyline, but i guess i should have re-watched the first one beforehand. oops. oh well. pretty good.
got up early today (12 noon! EARLY! YEAH!) and went to pick dad up from the airport. yep dad's home :) it's good to have him around again, and mojo (dog) isnt so melancholy anymore. heh.
later, lexi came over to do her research project for the hospital volunteering deal she's got going on. she doesn't have powerpoint and her printer's whacked out. so yep. that was entertaining. i learnt a bit about down syndrome. :( its really sad about the whole internal problems that go on. *sigh* anyway. we were gonna go out tonight too, but her parents wouldnt let her out on a "weeknight".. blah. learnt something suprising though. i haven't called ash in like 2 days and lex informed me that ash was gonna break up with her bf. and im like WHOA. haha alot can happen in 2 days. the 3 of us have communication issues.. one will tell another something and forget to tell the other! haha it happens, but we're always smacking our foreheads : "WHAT? I DIDNT TELL YOU?!?!!" doh. heh. oh well, ya know? we'll live. i think the 3 of us are gonna be carpooling to school next year.
speaking of school. man. it's starting soon. august 13th. my 4th year attending freshman orientation. lol dammit and i'm a senior! 1st year i was a freshman so hay i had to be there, 2nd year i was on sophomore student council so i had to be there again and last year i had to be there because i was a big sister. and yep. i'm a big sis again this year. *sigh* and then when i go to college i'll have to be a freshman again and attend another orientation! whaaat. haha that's life i guess. sorry. just another musing.
i finally finished one of the summer reading books. bleh. The Remains of the Day by Kazuo Ishiguro. first i thought it was a really boring, stream of consciousness book, but after finishing it, ya know, i think it was really well written. anyway i have another 2 books to read. one is an anthology of poetry by 8 separate american authors, and the other is The Norman Conquests, forgive me, i cant remember the authors right now. i have to buckle down some more and do the summer independent study packets as well! man. i hate summer homework, moreover, i hate my school. yay.
dad's leaving for san francisco on friday. on the trip i was supposed to go on. at this point in time, i'm glad it's him who is going, and not me. i doubt i can handle staying with my mom and brother for a few days. whoa scary thoughts. mom would probably get on my case about having an attitude. mind you, i haven't had an "attitude" in MONTHS. ive been biting my tongue and holding back all my smartass comments for a long time. but i guess people dont see the effort you put into the good things, but rather highlight your bad points like no frickin other.
i think i have a dermatologist appointment on friday as well, let's see what the doc has got to say about my complexion this time round, i'll take note of what he says. oh yeah. we're gonna go watch pirates of the caribbean friday night, should be fun :) i hear its really good!! mm rawr johnny depp and orlando bloom!
okok im almost done.
i have to say i love text messaging (sms) :) kinda expensive on my phone though, 10 cents a message sent. *sigh* i have to cut down, my bill was horrendous last month. free to receive, however! send me one *wink*
um ok, LAST words.
RIGHTEOUS! RIGHTEOUS! RIGHTEOUS! *grin* yay finding nemo! i <3 that movie, if you haven't seen that yet then you deserve to be flushed down the toilet. hee.
k. all done.

audio:: mae- "embers and envelopes"