i guess you can say i have these phases where i update really often, almost everyday, then times where i go weeks without making a peep here. whoa mad crazy. maybe you can tell which phase i'm at now? hahahaha

so. today was a hellish day. psychology test, math test and english test, all in a row, only with a 15 minute break to study for english (read all the poems we were being tested on, and retaining nothing). as you can expect, yeeeeah didn't do too well on them. other than that, today wasn't too bad. we were allowed to (buck-a-jeans) wear jeans and regular clothes today, which was nice, but i had to pay a dolla and i was pretty poor after that. except there was a mass confusion on whether or not we were supposed to wear our class colors (seniors = red)..... and my tshirt was like a coral peachy color... not really resembling red. but oh well i guess the school made a booboo about all the freakin announcements : YES BUCK A JEANS BUT SCHOOL SHIRTS.... NO WAIT BUCK A JEANS AND YOUR OWN SHIRTS.. NO WAIT!!!! BUCK A JEANS BUT CLASS COLORS! make up your damn mind! whatever, i didn't get in trouble and none of the teachers commented so that was fine.

i forgot to say i picked up my new contacts yesterday from the optometrist and i'm wearing them now, not much difference from my old ones though. and i still prefer my contacts over my new glasses anyday, even though theyre tres sexy, n'est-ce pas?! (SORRY, MUSICAL WITHDRAWALS!)

speaking of the musical (ONCE AGAIN!) here are some good ol memories that val wrote up (i helped!) and i don't feel like compiling my own list, so they're ripped from her but i edited them a little to fit my personal memories.(i love you val! zzt!)

- Dinners at Oregano's
- "Groundhog!"
- "Rip the chipmunks!"
- Pirates!!
- spandex
- buttered toast tights
- spanking
- "Toxic" lesbian sex dance/strip
- the lesbian seagull
- BIG bouffant hair
- whore makeup
- 5 & Diner
- "She's a stripper of life!"
- Stuffed turkey
- Raping Marc's car in the 5 & Diner parking lot with lots of proof!
- interpretive backstage dancing
- Andrew breaking the chair at the 1st cast party
- the flooding of the girl's bathroom
- my drug dealing, ONLY FOR STREET CRED.
- "Erector set"
- BONER!
- "Caboose!"
- "There is a sisterhood...of girls!"
- who's yo klepto?
- Skanky secretary dresses
- "This irresistable, Paris original, Tres sexy n'est-ce pas?!"


also, here are some pictures that i also stole from val! haha WHO'S YO KLEPTO!?!

that would be us pirates, and yes that does look like my hand is on another girl's ass! and check out that tv announcer vest on taylor, fruitiest thing i've ever seen, but it rocked and everyone loved it!



the skanky secretaries singing to rosemary, telling her she should get married because that's what allllll secretaries aspire to have. doh. the sexism. i'm the one on the extreme right, you should be able to identify me by my hair, lol.



some 5 and diner fun after the 1st night's show. what in the world do we get up to, eh?

so, i don't know about you, but i think it's pretty funny when my neighbors try and hit on me. well i wouldn't count hunter coming over to say hi yesterday, but introducing his friends to me while i'm looking dishevelled in my school uniform while my hair is a mess, maybe a different story. haha. then today, hunter's younger brother (so he's like 16) also coming over to say hi and bringing his whole entourage of friends... just a little alarming, especially the way they were looking at me in my tank top and boxers (so i guess i don't dress up to take my cousin to the learning center.. i don't expect to run into anyone special or anything). it's kinda funny when i think back about it now. but i forgive the staring and everything because they're building a go-kart and that's just way cool.
ahh random events are the ones i laugh about.

i didn't go to strike the set today because i didn't feel like it. but i still don't have those damn shoes from "Auntie Mame" that i wanted. my cute little chinese slipons. i'll get them eventually.

curse you aquascum!!! (finding nemo, anyone? anyone?!)

audio:: britney- "breathe on me"

so, i don't know if i've ever posted the lyrics to my favorite song, but now i've decided is the right time. if you've never heard it, i suggest you go get it NOW. RIGHT NOW. hear me biatches?

so kids, the musical is over.

i feel like a part of me died. i've made so many friends through all the shows i've been in, and i've learned so much from each of them. it's something i find so hard to give up, so quickly, just like that.
the show went GREAT. each of the three nights were fantastic, we really pulled it together and made it so wonderful that people were impressed. i don't think people were expecting a good show because they had heard that it was going really crappily.. but somehow through a miracle, it all worked out and it was awesome. personally, i thought opening night was the best, the audience was the best that night too. it just gave us so much joy to know that the crowd was laughing at the jokes and being so responsive.

ashley came on thursday and shannon came on saturday, and i'm so grateful that they did, it was nice to know that they were in the audience. i really appreciate them coming to watch and root for me, even though i had such a minor part. i don't think i could express how thankful i was that they were there, but i really really do appreciate it. thanks, poops!

we had a mass on friday for the musical itself, and that was a pretty touching time, and even though i'm not catholic, i really enjoyed it because it was so reflective and neat. yeah, neat. i got a blessing from the priest, and he said "may you shine like the stars tonight". and when i heard those words i was just blown away because it began to sink it that it was my last show. now, i say "my last show" because i'm pretty sure i won't be doing theatre and all that in college. i don't know why i've decided that, but i kinda feel that these shows are just part of my highschool life, and i doubt anything can top it. i want it to preserved in such a way that i don't want it to be tainted. but who knows? maybe i'll change my mind, but for now, it remains as "How to Succeed" being my last show ever.

so. on that sad note, last night was really bittersweet. we had speeches just before we went onstage, and all the senior speeches that were given were making me THISCLOSE to crying, but i blinked the tears away because my makeup was already done and i didnt want all of it running down my face. and yeah, it was tough holding the tears back. and i couldn't even force myself to give a speech because i knew i'd just break down and that would have been bad. but it's okay, everything was perfect the way it was.

as i close this chapter of my life, i can't help but feel really sad about it all but it's inevitable, and i should embrace it as a great part of my life that i will always remember fondly and i'm proud to be part of the drama group. REALLY proud.

ON A HAPPIER NOTE! hahaha sorry, i can't help but be a little sad about it all but now we shall talk about the happier notes of last night. my family came to see the show and they really liked it and i know my mom likes watching plays and musicals so i was glad that she said she really enjoyed it. they brought me flowers and were so cute.
the cast party was fun! it was at anny's house and there was lotsa food and the awards were hilarious. lexi and cody even dressed up for them. there were some really great awards like the "sound cues or sex?" award to scotty bc he was always w his girlfriend, then taylor's "i wanna keep my tv announcer vest" award bc of his rainbow colored vest, katie's "look up when you walk" award, bc she almost got hit by a fly (BIG piece of wood, as an "office") while onstage, alana's "most infectious laugh" award, etc etc. my award however was pretty funny. when lexi got sick and lost her voice + bad sore throat, i brought her some chinese herbal medicine stuff that i take when i have a super bad sore throat. and it works friggin miracles, that stuff. anyway i gave it to her and told her to take "6 pills twice a day!!" and thus my award was the "street cred./drug dealer" award. haha so awesome.

good times good times. i also jacked my pirate hat because as tradition, we all take something to remember the show by, so i took my costume piece. argh matey, i wanted my damn pirate hat. :)

that's all folks. i'm done talking about the show, and i will always look upon the last few nights with deep feelings of nostalgia.

"I've waited hours for this
I've made myself so sick
I wish I'd stayed asleep today
I never thought that this day would end
I never thought that tonight could ever be
This close to me"
-"Close to me" by the Get Up Kids.

To the cast and crew of "How to Succeed", i've had the time of my life and i wouldn't change a thing. i miss you guys already, and thank you for making my last show so incredible. kisses for all of you!

audio:: the format- "one shot, two shots"

as i sit here with a pile of stage makeup on my face, and my hair in a half up bouffant (read: big, teased, 60's hair), i am tired out of my wits and hurting like a mofo.
SO, it's tech week my friends.. otherwise known as hell week, or the week of the musical. rehearsals have gone till like 8-9pm and so that means i'm basically coming home and going straight to bed. yay! still however, all of us in the musical are walking around like we're zombies. *sigh*
the show opens tomorrow night. i'm a little nervous for it, but today our director told us we were "fabulous" and she said she never expected to tell us that. impressive.
yesterday we were dancing all over the place to britney and kelis and all that. today the girl's dressing room/bathroom flooded. today i also had mad crazy pains in my stomach and i have no idea why. maybe because i didn't have much to eat? let's hope i'll be fine tomorrow, ready to give the audience the biggest, cheesiest smile i can muster. woohoo!

this is my last show i'll do at xavier (and possibly, ever). it's kinda sad when i think about it, because this is it. the cast, the crew, the bonding time, the makeup and costumes, the adrenaline rush from being on stage. by saturday night i think i'm not quite sure how i'll feel when i hang up those character shoes and call it a day.

anyway. come to the show people! it's funny, it's good, and you'll have an awesome time!

and now, time for your weekend update.
if only i had jimmy fallon with me to do this.

my weekend's been pretty good. shannon's birthday (happy birthday love!) was on saturday and she had a great day, so that makes me happy. on friday we went to the esplanade to catch a movie (taking lives....... didnt really wanna see it anyway, boo scary movies) but it was sold out, so we walked around and felt like 8th graders. later we went to a party and that was fun, however there was a trampoline and so i was pretty much set for the night. except i sat on the edge of the trampoline and i guess there was water on the edges or something bc my bum got really wet and it looked like i had peed myself. now i assure you, i did not, but if you happen to think otherwise, then um. uh. okay i don't know what you could do, but i really didnt! also, the dog was really excited and started humping everything in sight. it was disturbing, if anything.

saturday included laying out to try and get a tan, plus dyeing my hair. yup. i decided it was time again. so now my hair is a shade of deep red. it looks more like a tint. i haven't decided if i like it yet though, but it's not super noticeable. since it was shan's bday i drove everyone (and her) around and yea we went to 2 parties and that was pretty fun. ash, lex and kt ended up sleeping over and i got to tuck them all into bed. i felt like a momma with 3 big girls for kids. yeaah. my maternal instincts are showing themselves.

sunday: had to pick dad up from the airport in the AM. later i headed over to the marriott with shan to watch the DVD premiere of the fashion show. yeeah. there are some funny blooper shots, they caught me dancing on film and it was a little embarassing. also with my funked out hair and makeup for the whole show. good times good times.

that's about my whole weekend...... with the exception of musical rehearsals. they are long and boring and we entertain ourselves tremendously by doing stupid shit backstage. for example....we dance around alot.. usually dramatic interpretations, or fake-o ballet, or stripper ho dancing. it's pretty diverse, really. i can't wait for the shows themselves, when we bring in the cd playa and dance in the dressing rooms. oh. we also bring in stuffed barn animals and leave them in various states of promiscuity backstage. hahahaha don't ask. but our director stormed in and yelled "GET THESE DIRTY ANIMALS OFF MY STAGE!!" it was classic because once we heard her coming we all jetted and left alex and taylor alone with her. i feel a little bad about that, but it was a kodak moment. FO RIZZLE.
i have more musical stories but for now, just come to the damn show and watch me prance around as a secretary and i'll be happy.

by the wizzle, i picked up my new glasses from the optician dude and they're so cute! hehe. someone said they look really 50's, but everyone else says they suit my personality. so hey red cat eye glasses for me any day! yay morning laziness where i dont have to pop in the contacts all the time! they kinda match my hair now too. lol.

well time for BED. and no homework!
oh and we got our report cards.. i did way better than i was expecting. not too shabby for a 2nd semester senior. not shabby at all.

audio:: maroon 5- "sunday morning"

i think i need to live up to my resolution to be more confident. and can't forget the carpe diem thang.

first off, i'd like to say that although my parents CAN be a little strict at times, and seemingly unreasonable.... they're really okay in the end.
my 'rents have finally consented to let me go to san diego for spring break. damn that's exciting. my mom and i just booked my flight. so much for road trip though, lol there won't be driving... bc they feel better if i fly in. anyway ash and i booked ourselves onto the same flight as shan and britt, so we're all set. except for the fact that lexi's parents decided to revoke their earlier decision to let her go.. and now she can't. and that sucks ass so much. because originally it was me who couldn't go, and now it's her.. and that isn't very fair. argh. maybe her parents will change their minds. we shall see.
well, i'm excited!! spring break here i come! sunny beaches and a nice tan are calling my name!
heh.

the musical is steadily improving.. we moved to the xavier main stage today, it was about time. we've gone from "crappy" to "mediocre". not too bad. about a week to go, i think we can pull it together.
come watch it though.
"How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying"
March 25, 26, 27 (Thursday, Friday and Saturday)
7pm, $7 (you can get your ticket from me, or the box office, preferably me. :P)

i was gonna go catch the yellowcard/something corporate/the format concert this saturday.. and stupidly i didn't buy my ticket in advance because i was waiting to here if my friends could go. big booboo. i should have just gone ahead and gotten it on my own. because now theyre all sold out. i can't believe it.

:( it's so disappointing, and i've been waiting for this show for a looong time. daaaaaaaaaaammit.

audio:: mad caddies- "10 west"

so halla.

you may wonder if i really speak like that in person.. and ya know what? i do. i've got all the yo's, what up's, homie g's, fo sho's, fo shizzle's, what the hizzle's, what-ev's goin on. BUT IT'S OKAY! my speech patterns have been really whacked out these days.

whoa. the past weekend was a little crazy. friday we ended up going to 3 little kick back parties.. one at pete's (never met him before), sabrina's and then nick b.'s. it was all in all a little disappointing bc i was looking forward to SOMETHING enjoyable. but it was okay. after i got home, kt and ash slept over and that was fun.

saturday morning there was another musical rehearsal. we've been having those up the wazoo and we're progressively not getting better. (in my opinion) every time i get home from rehearsal.. especially ones that include the pirate dance spiel, i feel like absolute shit bc i'm not doing very well in the dance area. i keep missing steps and cues and i feel like crying every time bc i'm always messing up. it's not fair bc i've never had dance training and i suck really bad at it.
well if that isn't bad enough. i had to work on saturday too. 5 hours at the register, dealing with impatient customers and i also messed up twice on that. bc it's so dark in the store and when people buy heaps of clothes and i'm trying to take off sensor tags, ring up the sales, be nice to them, fold and bag everything at the same time, the DARK BLUE shirts end up getting dropped somewhere and so twice the customers didnt get their dark blue shirts... bc they blend in so well in the darkness. overall, still my fault and it was embarassing bc my manager had to mention to me "hey holly, make sure you don't forget to give people what they're buying okay".. argh. i sure felt stupid about it.

anyway later lexi came and picked us all up and we went over to tg's to wish him happy birthday (he's 19!).. when we got there everyone was standing in the street.. so that was kinda weird but cool? hahahaha. anyway, there was alot of people and alot of food. but we ended up leaving early bc we were headed back to nick b's house for a big party he was having. that ended up being quite fun afterall. i think i have a new nickname of "back-rub girl". i don't even remember how it began but before i knew it i was on the trampoline handing out massages like candy. haha that sounds so weird.
lexi had to leave and so zach drove ash and shan back to my house and they slept over. except that in my drunken state i think i flipped out at them at shannon for sleeping in my bed? and i just slipped into a really bad mood and i don't know how. it was really weird bc i don't remember much of it all, except talking to them over the balcony thingy inside of my house. another embarrassing moment, but one to laugh about i think. that was a little scary, i hate not knowing what i've done.

anyway, today monday was my day off. :) that was nice. i went to visit the eye doctor/optometrist/optician today. turns out my prescription for my contacts has gone up a little. and my mom decided that it was time for a new pair of glasses!!! yay!!! i picked out a really cute frame. it's one of those plastic frames, but not THAT dorky, it's got a cat-eye shape to them and they're red!! :) they're funky and awesome and i can't wait to get them. then i won't have to wear my contacts every freakin day and i can just grab my glasses and go. yay!! my mom dropped quite a bit of money for me to get them and i feel a little guilty. argh.

hmm i brought larky lunch today bc i owed him one from last time. i like brophy at lunch, it seems so chill and relaxed as compared to xavier. wandered around a bit and ended up talking to a bunch of people and meeting up w shan and britt and ash as well. they were headed to ASU to get their ID cards done but stopped to drop off lunch with mitch and chaz. overall that was quite nice. anyway. later i came home then i had to go back to brophy after like 2 hours because i had musical rehearsal again. dude, we suck SOOOO BAD. okay enough of that..

well i'm now sitting here contemplating why i have not started my homework yet and wondering if i'll even do any of it.

audio:: lostprophets- "last train home"

why hello.

it almost seems like i forgot all about my trusty journal. but no, i've just been really preoccupied.
let's see, there's been some crazy shiat going on, i've been kinda depressed lately, if you haven't noticed. but i figure it's just a phase that i'll be out of sooner or later. so don't worry too much, kay?

i fell sick last week. majorly sick... i had a grand total of three diseases.. lolol strep throat, tonsillitis and conjunctivitis. all at the same time! it was like i was suffering from death.
see, i don't usually miss school. in fact, i hadn't missed 3 years worth of school.. until last week. i ended up not going to school for three days bc i was feeling like crap and stayed in bed all day.. and then just this monday i was over at ASU for my orientation program. but more on that later.
yeah i hate being sick and one reason why i hate missing school is because i fall behind in classes and lessons and homework and then i have to make it all up and pretty much stress myself out. well, that pretty much happened. i've been making up work all week, and probably all next week too. it frickin sucks ass, but what can you do? at least i feel better. thank god.

so, ASU on monday, orientation went pretty well, kinda boring, they kept repeating the same things over and over again. i pre-registered for my classes and hopefully those will be the ones i get. i'll be taking english 101, math 170 (precalculus.. again, i know), sociology 101, the human event (mandatory humanities class for the honors college students), and macroeconomics 111. yup, i'm all ready for college to be here. heh. later, my bro and travis came and rescued me from the program.. they were skating around on their longboards while i walked with them to their design studio. pretty cool, i finally got to see where my brother went to class everyday. lol. i think i'll really enjoy college. the atmosphere is so relaxed and chill, i love it. (compared to xavier, that is). ASU here i come!

so the musical is about 2 weeks away and we are so not ready. this has to be the most non-united cast i've been a part of. maybe as the show comes nearer, we'll get closer or something, but it's so weird being in this show. it's way different from the other ones i've done. not much bonding, and that sucks. oh well, i guess i just have to try my best for the next two weeks and then when the show is over, i'll get to work more.

random note: 4th quarter seniors, baby. about 2 more months to go before we graduate. it's a little scary to think about.

so since i go to a catholic private school, my spring break is of course not at the same time as all the other public schools around. sucky, yes. but at least once we get back from it, it'll be all downhill from there. my spring break is during the first week of april-ish. the week before easter.
anyway, my point is that my friends wanted to organize a roadtrip to san diego. partly to celebrate shannon's and lexi's birthdays, and also just cuz it's spring break, man. well turns out everyone can go, except me. bc there isn't going to be an adult chaperone, i can't go. which i think isn't too unreasonable, i guess, but i'm still not happy with it. i mean, i don't have curfew, i'm a good kid and i listen to my parents. but i guess that's not trustworthy enough to go on a road trip with my friends. 2 things my dad will never let me do: 1. go on trips with friends... 2. stay in the dorms in college.

big bummer.

*sigh* i don't want to think about it anymore. at least it's a three day weekend, thank god.

audio:: yellowcard- rough draft.