Can't remember what day this is when it happened... so long ago. Aniwae our family was stuck on where to eat, so Dad juz ended up driving somewhere near Orchard Road dere but not quite... around Clemenceau avenue I think. Didn't know that place was so expat-ish. Either touristy or expat-ish, lots of ang mohs around. It's got such a quaint cosmopolitan flavour, and seems like not many people know about it because not many locals around. Then there were lyke, Vietnam restaurants, Italian restaurants, bars maybe... we were walking up and down dunno what to eat. It was getting late btw, ard 9.30, and lots of shops want to close already. In the end we settled for this Japanese restaurant.
It's authentic. So authentic. The floor is made of wood, the tables are low, you are supposed to sit down cross-legged on cushions and eat. Not like Sakae Sushi or some other commercialised joint. It probably caters to the Japanese expats- lots of them around, with Japenese children running around too, *thud *thud on the wooden floor. So cute! The menu was in Japanese, but there was this little one by the side that was thankfully in English. It was the Chef's recommendation, so we just ordered everything from there
The service is superb. Can't think of any other place in my life that gives better service man. The waitresses were so hospitable and friendly, almost as if we were friends or loyal customers like that, though it was our first time there. They will kneel down and serve your food, and that was like, *whoa.
The lights were bright, but the atmosphere was so cosy and warm... we had dinner together with everyone in the family talking, goodness, how many months (years?) has it been since we last did this? I finished up the omelette rice that my mum ordered, and oh my, it tasted so homecooked I almost cried with happiness there and then. It's been approx. 7 years since I last ate something like that. I mean, sometimes Dad cooks spaghetti or soba or mee suah... and I love it very much (thanks, Dad!) because it tastes so good, but somehow, it doesn't taste like what I used to eat every day a looooooong time ago. Something like rice and soup, simple dishes... nice homecooked food...
K nvm. That is past. "Clemenceau avenue"... then I realised it is also her past too. Maybe they are kinda expats when they first came. Dunno. Not bad then, in such a short time she can come to like it here and blend in so well. Hope she can sui2 yu4 er2 an1... be happy wherever she is because she globetrots so much. But anyway she is also past now... there is the present and future to take care of.
If you ask me to go back there again, I wouldn't know how. It is like this little hidden enclave near Orchard Road, and we kind of wandered there by accident, like some wandering traveller. It was like a foreign country, because it's so unlike Singapore. Never mind. That place, like so many other things, will continue its existence in memories.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 07:23 p.m. Monday, March 1, 2004
Irrelevant. That's the only thought that goes through my mind during phys and a maths and ss lessons about electrostatics and differentiation and good governance and what have you.
Irrelevant.
And prob like every other lesson too. And everybody now is in the you-must-do-well-for-your-"O"s kinda thing, like it has always been, "Nanyang wad"- simply put in the words of some1.
I just feel that, I shouldn't be stuck in some classroom memorizing facts I would never care about if nobody found them out. Should be spending time like, learning more about horses and the equine industry?
Maybe you say there's a time for everything and right now what I should do is concentrate on studies and after I get some degree maybe I can start my career.
I juz feel I'm really lagging behind if I want to start a career in the equine industry. As in, people who live and breathe horses are probably winning barrel races, going on trail rides, watching mares give birth to foals, grooming their own horse and stuff like that at my age.
Where am I? Such a joke.
I plan to study till A levels... no uni, no masters, etc. etc. coz that's what you need to be a horse trainer. I have a feeling you don't even need A levels to study equestrian studies at some college.
Jia you... 2.5 years of studying and you can go live your dream
There's gotta be more to life
Yep so most of the time I go through school like that. And maybe that's why I'm feeling grouchy more than usual.
Or, maybe, there's gotta be more to life than even horses.
Going back home one day, shun bian while walking to side gate said Hi! to CT sqms eating lunch at CC plot. Juz a simple greeting, crapping and tokking and all my grouchiness disappeared. Really.
So, maybe life is about the simple joys- friends, horses, memories, hopes and dreams. Life is about different things for everyone, but as of now that'll be it for me. When I grow older, maybe what life is about will change, but at that time,
I'll keep searching.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 04:19 p.m. Wednesday, February 18, 2004
Frenship dae/v-dae... find this year's present-giving very rampant, lyk 1 big flood? Everybody's giving everybody chocs/sweets/flowers/other prezzies... literally everybody. Ms Ng and Mdm Toh (zuo lao shi) also gave us. Thanx! Which actually is a good thing coz lately I've been hungry a lot and I lurrv sweet sweet stuff. Sorry can't really remember who gave what, but what I remember...
*thanx sqms for the candies/marshmallows/ribbon rose and
*thanx B36 for cookies and chocolate grapes
*thanx yining for the lollipop rose
*thanx shu ping for the felt heart
*thanx sam, marian, kax, meli and charlene for the huge choco cookies! can't remember who did which cookies. Oops sorry
Quite happy got lots of food. But eh... still hungry lehz.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 04:07 p.m. Wednesday, February 18, 2004
Sandals- peaceful, daydreamy, and thoughtful, you
often find yourself staring into space. When
you aren't out volunteering you are often just
dreaming away. You enjoy the company of
friends sometimes but enjoy peace and quiet.
What Kind of Shoe Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Wow. Haven't done quizzes for loooooooong.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 03:55 p.m. Wednesday, February 18, 2004
Back so earli from school for once. Nid to do lots of out-of-school stuff so go home early. Break record liao. Aniwae blog here a bit before I rush off to do other stuff:
This thought just developed in my mind- I've always known if you're always really nice and obliging to other people, people will soon regard you as a pushover and take your kindness for granted. What's new is that the opposite is quite true too, if you are a teeny bit subtly mean, act like you have the right to and don't feel guilty and never apologise for it, people will unconsciously think that you are assertive in a positive kind of way- call it charismatic, leadership or whatever. But of course if you overdo it and it becomes obvious, people get reeally pissed off, hate you and will slap you one day. It's like, the fine art of being mean? Not Simon Cowell-ish mean, that is like so public and in-your-face, but more... subtle.
I guess most people who are nice, are nice because they really believe in the "treat others like how you want to be treated" thing. True, tt's a really commendable thing to believe in, but sadly in this world it's somewhat not possible. It's human nature to take things for granted, and if you consistently are kind then people will assume they have a right to your kindness. They won't think they have to repay you back.
Conclusion: If you stop apologising for things you perceive are offending other people, basically bending over backwards for other people, people will stop treating you like their piece of play-doh to be moulded and shaped into their liking.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 03:25 p.m. Wednesday, February 18, 2004
To you, fellow 4/13-er:
I have to admit, I'm not really close to you, but that doesn't stop me from noticing stuff about how you've been lately. Maybe it's there, or maybe I'm just too sensitive and seeing things that aren't actually there, but I have a feeling it is for real.
From what I've being observing, seems like you are going through a tough period in your life; and you aren't taking it very well, withdrawing and becoming increasingly unable to fit into the world around you. I don't know what you are going through, I don't know why you are feeling the way you do, but, I just want to say... hang on, pal. Chin up, and take it slowly, one step, one day at a time. Just concentrate on the simple things in life that makes you truly happy; use this to tide over today, and renew your hope for a better tomorrow. For me, it has been my hopes and dreams, people who love me, my dog, grass, sunrise/set, the beach, but really, it could be anything as long as it works for you. Just forget about pressures and expectations for once, and just... be. Take care of yourself, do things you really like and go to sleep early, rest, recover and try to find back the happiness slowly. Treat yourself well. Cry if need be, and don't stop till you feel better. Do anything and everything you know to make yourself happy, at peace with yourself, or even numb, just so long as you don't feel the pain so much.
If it gets any worse, please, please, don't keep it to yourself. Talk to someone. Anyone. I have thought about talking to you about it, but I don't know if I'm the right person because I'm not really that close to you and I don't know if I can do a proper job of listening. I mean, I don't even know whether you want to talk to me or not, so it would be kind of rude if I barge in and force it out of you. But... go find someone you are comfortable with, and share your problems ya? Don't ever make the mistake of keeping too many things inside till its too late, because for these kind of mistakes, it is never easy to go back.
Above all... remember that what won't kill you will only make you stronger. Hope you become a stronger person after what you are going through... you have it in you to overcome whatever obstacles you are facing now. Believe me. Remember, there are people around you who love you, if you think you can't handle whatever you are facing now, tell someone. Rightaway. We'll do whatever we can to help.
Wish you all the best.
Take care,
Ren
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 09:50 p.m. Thursday, February 12, 2004
Yesterday Mr Kuo said index no. 2,4,6,8,10 muz go for this survey thingy in LT2, dey randomly select one. dunno what it was about. Angie(2) couldn't go, Joanna(12) sub her. Den LT2 was locked (2nd level), so we went into LT1 tinking Kuo made mistake. Den we got this form for EOY overseas CIP and we were like, huh? Wadda heck? Realised whole room was full of s3s. Bleah. So blur. Aniwae got into LT2 through the first level entrance.
It was this survey about suicide and stuff... so disturbing. Bleahz. We were expecting some gep thing coz inside was geppers of all levels. Bleahz. Then, how come dey only ask geppers about suicide? Prob. assuming smth. Blahz.
Some more the survey was looong... 7 pgs about suicide. Hehz. We were all purposely tuo-ing coz we wanted to miss geog extra lessons. Geog under our new teacher Ms X sucks. Really sucks. Aniwae we ended up giggling and stuff and Ms Lee was asking why we were giggling doing such a serious (read: morbid) survey. "We are laughing because we are stressed and going mad" "Den you shld write it down on the paper"... lyk... ok... den we giggled some more. Oh well. Walked really slowly to the geog room. HATE geog now.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 09:38 p.m. Thursday, February 12, 2004
Bleah. Feeling really grouchy. A stoopid sui bi also dunno how to do and write crap. Then yesterday we got this really cheem (to me) zuo wen abt your views about the 2 world wars and every one was writing their compo so normally and easily and I was struggling really hard with every word. Then read others compo when they finished and realised mine is so out of point that I rewrote the whole thing while crying. Idiot. And screwed up for differentiation test, when I promised I'll put in extra effort for A maths this year and I have until now. And then I don't understand anything about electrostatics, some kind soul teach me please. Really feel like quitting sch after "O"s if not for the equestrian studies thing.
Yupz so I was grouchy. First physics should go and die. Then A maths should go and die too. While they are both dying HCL shall go and die too. Then the teachers can go and die too. And soon I was wishing everyone I meet will just go and die. Then everyone I know should go and die. Then my mind started popping out names, like, you want her to go and die? serious? and also her, and her and her? then I replied myself and said yar she and she and she and everyone else can go and die too. qu si ba. Oh well luckily it didn't last long. The last time it happened I was like that for probably a week. And the feeling was more intense. So today wasn't so bad, just a day onli. So, yeah, everyone I know: you all can start living again now. Juz PMS-sing again.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 09:24 p.m. Thursday, February 12, 2004
OH my goodness. Last time I blog here was CNY. That's so long ago. So many things been going on. Something like last year November liddat, but not until so extreme. Last year, really best man, cannot beat.
What's been happening? Lots of things, but also not worth putting here la. Lots of crazy stuff, lots of once-in-a-lifetime stuff, oh well. But also just mundane life going on as usual. Bleahz
Oh, yup. Was starting to get serious about my future career in the equine/canine industry. Now I want to be an endurance rider (smth like horse racing, just that now it's like a marathon, so endurance counts more than speed), showjumper (horses jump over those barriers, see b4 rite?) stable groomer, apprentice jockey, maybe farrier (put horseshoes on for horses), dog trainer, work in the police dog unit or CNB where they use dogs to sniff drugs, dog groomer, professional dog shower... something like that. You get the point.
Then on the other hand, I want to go volunteer on humanitarian missions to places like Cambodia, Vietnam, Laos, Africa and South America and so on and help the people over there. Very meaningful.
Hmm... got my life planned out perfectly liao. But before I get to that stage must get through the "O"s. sigh. Can't get through "O"s then can forget about all that. Might as well go work in the Singapore Turf Club as a horse handler, they got position for one, all you need is primary education. Actually for stable groomer and farrier (I think) you only need Sec 2 education. Very tempted to quit school after "O"s and embark on a career I really love budden people will look down on you and treat you like dirt so... *sigh. And I want to go study equestrian (cheem word for horse) studies in college... Australia should have. :D
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 09:02 p.m. Thursday, February 12, 2004
Yesterday, CNY eve. Morning, go back to Henry Park and visit teachers. Only Gracia, Sarah and me from NY came back. Quite sad la. The RGS girls turned up in full force. :P Oh whatever.
But now... I guess we've also drifted apart from ex-classmates, there seems to be nothing much to talk about. Mostly is listen to teachers entertain us and then we go and pilfer their sweets and oranges and eat and eat and eat ;).
Mrs. Idil wants us to go organise a renuion for HPPS GEP batch 1988, den tell dem so dey can come and oso muz gif them pics yadda yadda... see how la. Everyone is so busy and not too keen on the idea. But tentatively it's somewhere in the June hols. Dunno when.
Afterwards, we ate Swensens at Holland V. The prices are so ex. and the chicken baked rice, though nice, is definitely not worth $11.40. I'm broke now. :P Quite a mind-numbing experience, actually. Left Swensens feeling zonked coz was using up all my energy to eat with people I haven't seen for years so the atmosphere is quite awkward :S.
Went home, found some nice red cloth and dressed Mintie up in pretty ribbons! She has a scarf round her neck, ribbons on all four feet and a traily ribbon thingie on her already bushy tail. Can tell she doesn't really like them tho. At first she resisted my attempts, den when she found out I meant business she allowed me, budden when she tinks I'm not looking she'll chew up the ribbon on her paws trying to get them off. Oh well. And she keeps running here and dere so by today Chu Yi 3/4 the ribbons on her feet have dropped out. Only her scarf and tail ribbons remain properly on :P Nvm she looked cute while it lasted :)
Wo bu yao qian guo nian... but bo pian... Happy new year to you, too *smile
Evening time, eat tuan yuan fan. This year different, coz usually we go over to Ah Yi's house (mum's sister) and have steamboat with their family, but this year it's a cosier affair with just the 5 of us. Well, it's supposed to be anyway. You know the "magic" feeling I was tokking about in the previous entry? I used to have a "magic" feeling about steamboat dinners too, when I was still small. This year, sadly, it has disappeared too. Maybe it's because I'e grown up... or maybe it's because at the start of the renunion dinner a porcelain swan broke and Dad and Mum had to argue over it and then Mum refused to join us for the dinner and proceeded to clean up the mess then go do some more housework while the remaining four of us ate in silence. Bro and sis had their eyes glazed over, glued to the TV set so their minds are not really there anyway. So that leaves just Dad and Me eating the "renunion dinner". So... hmm I guess with such circumstances there can't really be "magic" feelings.
<< going to grandma's hse bai nian, continue later>>
<< Now is 23rd Jan, Chu Er >>
Continue from just now. Okay, so it wasn't much of a reunion dinner. :P Den after we ate all we can I went up to my room and rest and mull over what happened and read and spent quiet time by myself. Dad popped in around 10pm asked whether we want to go watch firecrackers at Chinatown; he'll drive us to Queenstown MRT station, park the car dere den we take MRT to Chinatown station. I was quite for the idea actually, something, anything to lighten up the sian sian stoning inactive atmosphere, like, it's Chinese New Year Eve! For goodness sake! HELLO? and it's so quiet at home. For some reason I guess sis didn't hear. Too busy reading her book :P. Den come 11pm, when Dad wanted to go, sis was like, throwing a tantrum on how she's been out the whole day and she's tired and she didn't want to go. Juz shouting and bitching and being spoilt and whiny and idiotic. Slap her la. Den mum and dad were like, in a mini-argument again on whether we should go or not. Bro was juz dao as usual. Can't really tell what he's feeling. Me? I almost cried. I dunno... here is Dad trying so hard to bring cheer to the family and he is meeting with so much resistance. But I was scared if I allowed myself to cry den things will get worse and besides it's not good to cry on cny or cny eve. Muz be happy and think happy thots :) So I thought happy thoughts and my face looks okay though my heart is breaking inside.
As we got nearer and nearer Chinatown, there were crowds and crowds of people (lots wearing red btw) and it got a bit noisy and re nao so sis was less grumpy and I was happier and everybody seem to be lighting up and waking up which was good :)
It was crowded! Packed full. Now I noe the meaning of ren shan ren hai... :P We were dere around 11.55pm, and in 5 min after the countdown there were lots and lots of fireworks! Dazzling, blinding, burst of colour! Everyone was cheering and roaring :D And also they let off the fireworks, from where we were cannot see but can hear. Deafeningly loud! Sounds a bit like v. heavy (the heaviest you can imagine) continuous rain on dose kinda zinc roof on top of kampung attap huts liddat. All dis time sis is clinging on to me (wide awake and no more angry) for, fear of getting lost? the noise? I dunno. At least she ain't bitching anymore.
We stayed dere until 12.30, den we went home. *thanks, dad.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 10:54 a.m. Thursday, January 22, 2004
CNY performance... I lurrv luuuuoooo! But now hit until hand sore already :( juz after the performance hand so sore (lactic acid?) until can't really lift it up. Okay now. the performance wasn't too bad la... but... I dunno... seems to lack some kind of "magic", the feeling I always used to get when watching lion dance performance when I was a kid, until like last year? Ms Ng says it's the "best she's seen in 6 years" :S but still, smth seems to be lacking, can't really noe wad, juz tt I dun get that feeling of being entranced and fascinated anymore... or maybe those feelings were juz being overrided by nervousness and concentrating on my luo, I dunno.
Feel quite sad actually, can't get to hui chun with my class coz it's our last yr together, budden... aiyahz, 2/13 will always be the best. If 4/13 doesn't change, it wouldn't really be a class worth remembering. NYGH GEP 1988 batch will always have a really special place in my heart, but 4/13... I'm not so sure about that. (Read entry below, for reasons) Even when I go find them after school end about 3/4 people left in class onli, the rest gone home/out/wherever they want and juz disappear from the class. *sighz... Gracia and I going back to Henry Park, anione else? Quite true wad the teachers said. As time goes by, pple forget abt their pri. schs., and stop going back... or maybe it's just becoz their pri. schs. changed beyond recognition such that there are no memories left and thus nothing worth going back for. I'm going back solely for the teachers. The building has changed, the uniform has changed, even the school culture has changed. I hope the teachers won't, but if they do, I guess it can't be helped... dat's when I'll stop going back.
Eat Reunion lunch at coro... eh... getting sick of Prince's food, leaving so much food behind when last time can eat everything up and feel full. Now, $6 seems quite ex. actually.
Another deja vu... dry shoot again. So familiar with tt place liao. *raining coins. Actually feel quite bad, coz sometimes to a certain extent it's the revolver's fault (some targets drop far more coins den others coz dere gun will rebound more. juz like some guns have less of a 1st/2nd click) , and now because the Sec 3s are so scared of losing their money dey concentrate so much on stability, wonder if dey actually sacrifice aiming for tt? Like maybe dun wan to move revolver so much even if the foresight is off-centre coz dun wan coins to drop
And realise their knowledge abt shooting is v. yi zhi ban jie.. not juz coz dey nv revise- some things I say dey seem to be hearing for the first time. Dey went to wet shoot without knowing what to do if a gun malfunctions??? goodness. Dey r very lucky it didn't manz. Myth of aiming below still continues on... how come every batch thinks the same. nvm, got potential. Dreaming of shooting team 04... *smile
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 10:40 p.m. Tuesday, January 20, 2004
4/13 (3/13)... so sian. Miss the heady days of 2/13! The whole class is just simply apathetic to anything. CNY deco tuo tuo until day of judging itself den we put up like, 70% of the whole thing? And the whole class wasn't involved lor. Even while we r busy making decos, some people can still sit at their tables and read and do maths hw and whatever else. And come 2.05, 75% of the class pack up and leave, leaving the same old 25% of the people (which amounts, to, 5???) to deco up the whole class. 5 pple how to deco class, tell me. Already we r short-handed, still want to do this kind of thing. :P idiot. The school shld let us combine classes or smth. Or maybe we juz dedicate all our 60+ pple to deco one class, and do a really good job, den share a prize meant for 36 among 60 pple.
But on the bright side, at least it was better than last year's miserable chalk-drawing on the floor. Maybe they shld have a best improvement class award. haha. and Grace's drawing is SO WOW! juz pick up a brush and start drawing and drawing and drawing. Come down to 4/14 from wherever in sch u r and see. It's worth a look. Lots and lots of looks, actually. Feelings will range from awe to inspiration to jealously to rage to avid search for Grace to praise her den hit her for being so talented. *juz kidding.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 10:25 p.m. Tuesday, January 20, 2004
Aaaaaarrrggh... so irritating :P. Went to GOH to sub in Li Ming as reserve (went dere, so deja vu :)), den fall out k... :P:P:P break my perfect record. Was seeing stars liao, den sedia from hormat can't do properly coz my baton and arms seems to be all over the place and dunno move what where first, suddenly got very hard to co-ordinate actions and I wasn't listening to Senior SSGT Firdaus animore, shld be dehydration, coz drank almost 2 bottles of water continuously dey gave me, in addition to the 1 bottle I drank abt 30 min ago at break? So about 1.5 litres of water, and could have drunk more one actually. Hrrmmmz... not the kind of person to drink water usually, dey suddenly become dis shui tong... :P
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 10:11 p.m. Tuesday, January 20, 2004
Finally a breather. *sigh of relief. It's not tt late, 2.13am, and as usual I'm the only one awake in the hse. Today is happy day :)
Can't really be bothered to blog about Penang trip, now tt it is so long ago. Hrmmm, just did lots and lots of visiting relatives basically (about 12h), and spent hours in daddy's car, daddy's younger bro's car etc. (12h travelling from Sg to Penang, 2h from Penang to Sungei Petani, 2h back to Penang from Sungei Petani, 12h travelling from Penang back to Sg, plus abt 0.5h everyday misc. purposes = 30h of stoning in the car) so in total about 42h stoning. As in really literally just sitting in one single spot and do nothing. xw will love this.
Nice Grace! :D Went over to 4/14 to do hw with her (smth I haven't done in a long time... sigh...) den halfway she asked if I wanted to eat lunch. I said no coz I didn't have enough cash even though I was hungry. Den she said nvm she'll go eat lunch herself. Den 10 min later she came back with 2 cups of Mug and 2 low mai kai! Says it's all on her :D:D:D. So nice! And actually feel quite guilty coz used a generous amount of her liquid paper and she didn't mind :) And a maths so far is nice to me this year. Binomial theorem is actually quite fun after a while :) happy day!
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 02:13 a.m. Tuesday, January 13, 2004
Ok. Haven't come here long time. Got so many things to blog about starting from way back Penang and Christmas and New Year. But really got no time for that now. Dis one really like fishbone in throat must get out.
IS MONEY REALLY THAT IMPORTANT??? Today mum having argument with dad about her problems at work coz she doesn't get recognised for her work, but when trouble strikes she gets blamed and she receives lots (x10) of crap from superiors above her. She just got promoted, and given a whole lot of lazybum troublemaking subordinates so yesh work is pretty miserable for her. I woke up dis morning and they are already arguing. She was in a bad mood for the WHOLE day and btw in her bad mood still trying to spring clean the house which by itself will put her in a bad mood.
Frankly when my parents fight that puts me in a bad mood too. And it doesn't help when good-intentioned Dad tells me they are juz having a "hectic discussion". We sent our dog for grooming. Den the groomer called and said they found our dog has ticks. We just sent her to a pet hotel before we left for Penang during Christmas where they gave her a de-ticking bath for 70 bucks. More like we paid 70 bucks to get her infested with fleas :P. Cheat our money and of course I was even angrier. Went to collect her in a bad mood.
Den when I came back my mum said if you are so unwilling to get her we can go put Mintie up for adoption. I was so xin sui lor. Maybe I gave her the impression that I was unwilling to go when actually I was in a bad mood, budden still dun have to say things liddat right??? Juz because one time I dun collect her from the groomer put her up??? Btw my mum still angry lor. Still spring cleaning hse wad what you expect.
Den dinnertime. Mum was screaming at me to feed Mintie her medicine. Whole night scream. I whole day in bad mood, so was she.
And you know what's the problem? MONEY. Not money problems, but problems caused by money. If my mum's working conditions are so bad, JUST QUIT. We could live perfectly fine on dad's salary. It would leave her happier and have more time to clean up the house and probably our family life won't be so screwed up. Even though now economy bad money is precious and everything, FAMILY is still number 1 lor. I dun see why our family has to suffer because of money. If we are left a bit poorer but more NORMAL, I'll be perfectly happy. If you ask me I dun mind moving back into a HDB flat. Like before. They are getting sooooo beautiful. Really. SAFER, convenient, lots of shops, FLAT LAND, more neighbours, less vicious dogs, better landscaping, better quality water, etc. And I want back the rubbish chute too, where it's more convenient. Now the price of flats are low coz got surplus. That's good too. If we can't be rich like some people Dad is always comparing himself to (even her family *sighz), den forget it. No use chasing dreams of nice houses with gardens etc. if we can't lead a happy family life coz everyone is miserable at work. Even Mintie would rather give up her grassland run den have people shouting all over the house because of her. *sigh... New Year Wish: back to HDB flat.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 09:34 p.m. Sunday, January 11, 2004
This kinda freaked me out a little in the morning, but now it's quite okay... I just take it as nothing more than a farnie coincidence...
Coz ever since she left, haven't dreamed about her at all, which was, kinda normal la. Not like I want her appearing all the time anyway. Then yesterday night I dreamed tt she called me on my handphone, (my hp clock showed 10.36am, I tink) and after the "Hello?" there was lots and lots of disturbance, then the call got cut off. I looked at the call register, her hp no. has changed slightly, and the caller name was San Francisco (???). Then I tried to call her back lots of times as well, but everytime got disturbance (was it static? can't remember) and can't get through. I remember moving from my bedroom gradually downstairs to spare room downstairs trying to get better reception, but I never managed to get through coz of the disturbance :P Den immediately afterwards I was back up in the study again (where I am now), and I was tokking to her on MSN, then the background of the conver window was Arnold Schwarzenegger and lotsa other pple's faces, and the map of California, smth like a collage liddat. Den she said "the man in the middle is not Arnold Schwarzenegger, it's the one to the (right?left? can't remember) and smth about he takes care of the western side of California, the desert and ranches etc." that was when I woke up, it was 7am.
Coz my sis shares my room with me, and she HAS to sleep with the radio blasting, so of course the radio was still blasting when I woke up. I was probably awake for only like, at most a few minutes, then it was time for the 7am news. Suddenly I had a bad sinking feeling, for juz tt 1 second. "2 dead as an earthquake hit central California, stretching from Los Angeles to San Francisco" the DJ was practically shouting it out and no it wasn't the radio blasting. That was freaky. But I guess it's just coincidence. Oh later found out tt the phone service in California now is patchy coz so many pple are trying to call through and prob the electricity is conked out. The damage done is mostly to some town called Paso Robles, with horse ranches and wineries, and some coastal town of Cambria (???). But the timing of earthquake is wrong from my dream. So, ya.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 08:02 p.m. Tuesday, December 23, 2003
I like the new shi-it's so small and cute and shiny! Go inside it and it feels so, well, new! And it's really light too, tt's good. Silver is a nice colour :) pretty
This year... lemme tink. Sent... ya. 23 Christmas cards :P and 22 e-christmas cards :P That's a lot of cards. Wishing everyone a happy christmas/2004 den.
=peace on earth=
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 07:38 p.m. Tuesday, December 23, 2003
*sigh... about tt act... dun really got much to say except for what huiyi has already said- we should swop NCOs more often.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 09:37 p.m. Sunday, December 21, 2003
Can't remember which day- went to sch to go clean the Mach-5 rifles, didn't know the barrel and trigger tt area is actually silver- it is normally encrusted with brown rust haha :D Spent about 1 hour plus cleaning, e 5 of us (mad, angie, huiyi, gl & me) only cleaned 10 out of, 60? haish. Later go Pizza Hut at BTP for lunch. *so full. The baked rice is nice! and didn't know near Lot 1 got big 2-storey Popular hidden away in some office building-thingie :)
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 09:30 p.m. Sunday, December 21, 2003
Sighz for so long wanted to write this, always keep forgetting... the heaven I was tokking about in one of the entries down dere? It's not heaven as in religious Christian defined eternal renunion of God that kind of heaven... it's more like... just somewhere everyone on this earth, regardless of religion/country/race goes to after they die... I just believe there's a place like that
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 11:42 a.m. Thursday, December 11, 2003
Okay found and squeezed out a bit of time and space to blog this: *deep breath here goes.
If it isn't already obvious enough, NYNP is going through a major turning point, which, has been quite long overdue already, considering how fast everything else changes. Cadets now become very, very vocal in expressing their thoughts, because of this one word: blog (like this one). I think at some points of my np life I also think similar thoughts to theirs, about dissatifaction of scoldings, of putting in so much and getting so little in return, or even criticism, of not being happy with the way some ma'ams carry themselves, but because there was still no such thing as a webpage where you just air your thoughts for everyone to see, and not even a yahoo! groups to discuss stuff with sqms, it was pretty much left unheard, or otherwise discussed a little bit during before sch, recess, after sch... and ma'ams don't know that much about it unless we tell it to them personally. And now we have access to information... lots and lots of information from cadets... and the previous batches of ma'ams before us don't have to deal with this experience... and it is up to us now to handle the information that we know- how much of it is just man yuan that every batch will say, and how much of it is serious stuff hinting at a problem that deserve a lot of serious attention, and maybe even a change of how NYNP works? And most importantly, how do we react to this information? Remember, the cadets will be watching.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 10:44 a.m. Thursday, December 11, 2003
I WANT!!!- 1 month horseback riding holiday in Cuyamaca Rancho State Park- 200km of trails :D:D:D:D 200km! woo-hoo! guess where's that? ;)
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 10:59 a.m. Tuesday, December 9, 2003
I was clearing up my table yesterday to finally start on homework... amidst the rubbish, found lots of stuff that reminded me of this year... *ouch... almost forgotten how :P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P:P it has been... all I can say is that I'm thankful for the fairytale ending.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 10:47 a.m. Tuesday, December 9, 2003
Ooh... squad chalet! For the first time my parents allowed me to stay overnight 2 nights- yay! Before the chalet wx came over to bake choc chip cookies- half of it cookie mix and half my own recipe :) spent the whole day baking, eating burnt cookies and in the end baked 2 large containers :)
Cranwell Bungalow 2 is super ulu-ated, all around is juz chalets, chalets and more chalets. We got lost the first time we were there. 15 minutes walk from the reception :P. Nearest decent civilisation is Changi Village and Tampines MRT, both 20 minutes bus 29 ride from where we are. It takes 10 minutes to walk to the bus stop, and still got waiting time, so at the very least it takes around 40 minutes to get to some decent place :P. It's big! got 3 nice bedrooms and one super ulu bedroom everyone is scared of,(bedroom no. 4- si, so :S:S:S)and there's enough space for everyone :) Activities: play cards, play mahjong (learnt in one night! so :D), watch tv, sleep, eat, clean up etc. so slack :)
2nd day we went over to TM and shopped for 6 hours- very tiring :P but there got lots of nice shops like ice lemon tee and 77th street to buy accessories, lotsa clothes stores and plenty of gift shops e.g. mini toons to see nice big soft toys! no money :( so didn't buy anything. Later went to NTUC and buy stuff for bbq, around 2.30pm went to Tampines MRT wait for ma'ams- we were juz sitting there on the floor, one large clump of people with lotsa shopping bags, and when ma'ams come they were late, and still want to zou zou to wait for their even later sqms... so... wasted so much time at the mrt station... very sian leh...
The bbq went nicely :) I thot fire-starting would be tedious and difficult but it was quite easy- used up the whole box of fire-starters :) and thanx jessica! brought soooo much food :) in the end coz no time we microwaved lotsa food- and they taste nicer actually :) played cards, mahjong with sqms and ma'ams whole night. I think Bibin (is that how you spell his name?) is cute! the politically-incorrect scowling face and the nice blue colour :) but meh-meh will always be the cutest :D
sorry about spoiling the whole fun slack lalala atmosphere in this entry, but feel muz add smth serious as well. Dere was dis time playing cards with ma'ams and sqms, den one ma'am started asking around hu was a Christian and stuff... like everyone playing cards on the table was except for me. Den ma'ams and sqms were discussing which church dey were going to, that part still okay. Den they really tou ru the religion stuff, it really made me feel quite uncomfortable at first, then I got pissed as it continued, but dunno how to tell coz they seem to be having such a tou ru conversation and it was rude to interrupt, no matter how uncomfortable I was getting. It continued for quite some time la, it's only after they left the topic for a period of time then I told them. I tink they don't know how it feels like to people of a different religion and free thinkers when they keep tokking about such religious stuff and some more they know that there are non-believers around. Probably they dunno how it feels like because it has never been done to them before. I mean, show a little respect for other people's personal space ya? Actually one such conversation once in a while is okay for me, can bear with it, juz that this year, got two cousins got married muz go church and keep listening to Christian songs I don't believe in and hearing so much lofty praise for a God I don't believe in (no offence), see first-hand the tension it caused (coz the rest of the family tree is still Buddhist), got harassed by Christians at KAP wanting us to convert and stuff... it's getting a bit too much la.
And something else too- I don't know how some ma'ams, seems like they just converted recently-I'm not sure, just treat a conversion to Christianity very lightly, like, "orh, just convert lor" that kind of gan jue... nv tell parents, every sunday sneak out of house go church, say that their parents bu guan anymore... I just find it quite disturbing la... like something so fundamental and important also never tell. But actually this is juz my opinion and if you are offended, please forgive me. Juz as I dun like to be offended by such religious stuff, I dun want to offend anyone. :S Oh but in the end they said sorry... I think they never realised it would make other people feel awkward... that was :)
Some sqms felt that juz have ma'ams come to chalet play cards and mahjong a bit the no meaning, dey wanted to tok, after a bit of outburst, then we tolked with yjm, wnm and xwm, tem came in afterwards. First tokked about ghost stuff and wadeva, den too creepy, changed to dreams stuff, den in the end tokked about np :) It was a nice conversation, the kind sqms had in mind when they want to jiang hua, and not tt kind of super lame ma'ams self-entertainment one...
yrm and alm had CI course, den come to chalet do CI assignment, didn't get to talk much with them, farnie how the ma'ams we got to jiang hua with all not our NCOs... hrmmz....
okok enough of serious reflective mood. how come nowadays all my entries end up liddat? I broke my record of non-sleep- now 2 days I haven't slept liaoz, some more add to 3 weeks of terrible on-off sleep :D Oh forgot to say we had breakfast at Changi Village one day, nothing really nice for me, juz drank one large mug of soya bean milk, quite tasty :) den we went to Changi Beach, the exact same spot as SLTC one, played for 10 minutes (only... :( ) and being the cheapskates we were refused to pay 10 cents to wash our feet in the toilet :)
Since we got miscommunication with the management and got one extra night we paid for but didn't really want, debbie, joe and xw stayed on the extra 3rd night and 4th day. wx and I left on the 3rd night, around 9pm liddat. The bus 29 seemed longer than usual, was so sleepy by the time daddy come at pick us up. wx and hy still have to go for jap exam on sunday the 4th day... goodness... jia you!
This year chalet better than last year :) Coz it's big and lotsa things to do :) and dunno why, but so happy to see sqms together all in one chalet- seems like long time no see liddat even though all of us have been seeing each other this whole month :D:D:D
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 11:13 p.m. Sunday, December 7, 2003
My second cousins came over from Penang some time after the NYCT selection that period of time, stayed over for 3 days 2 nights at our place :D Wee Liam had some chess competition here in sg, and he was representing m'sia with a lot of other people, so his mum, sis Sue Yin and himself came over :) Actually was really tired, esp. after NYCT selection, didn't really talked much to them, it was more of let the adults do the tokking :P. Sue Yin is now so tall! like one head above me and as dark as me too :) We got watch dark water vcd with Wee Liam on the 2nd day, and scaredy-cat sis was screaming all the time :P:P:P took a few pics, den they left back for kedah by coach at beach road dere. Muz have seemed quite quiet to them, budden... hrrmmmz... nv slept well for three weeks and counting. :S
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 09:35 p.m. Sunday, December 7, 2003
Straight after SLTC... NYCT selection. A bit the no break hor?- juz go home and sleep for one day, this whole month my home like hotel liddat, juz go back to sleep only, and most of the time dun even go back- my sis says she's used to taking up the whole bed already :P
A bit the sad, coz only 13 pple from our sqd turned up... *sigh. Morning run from sch to KAP, *sigh dunno why v. tired liddat, maybe coz juz recovered + lack of sleep for 3 weeks + haven't been running for weeks + dunno wad else. thanx joe, cheryl, si hui :D and oso others hu helped chai ling and hui yi~ and si hui watch out for lampposts too next time horz! :) but still thanx :) and yrm was nice- ran with me during the last stretch and asked if I was ok :) afterwards the pumpings etc. seemed like a breeze after the run, but a bit the yi han coz burpees nv do properly- the right twisted knee still giving problems now and den, till now can't go down on right without hand support, and sometimes can't squat for long. Or is all this juz excuses? Den muz buck up!!
I wanted to be bowliner, second choice lasher, but actually 2nd choice quite far off coz my clove hitches are quite hopeless. I tink all my bowlining areas went quite well- even twine broke still settled it quite nicely, and looks so neat!~proud of myself. I won't say things like tried my best and jing li le coz it's quite cliched, and that time of showing your bowlining skills is actually quite short for giving everything you've got- it's not like, a 3.2 run or atc or stuff as taxing, where you actually got time to juz pia and pia and pia, it's something quite short and before you know it, it's over that kinda thing. But I tink put in lots of mental effort too at bowlining stations, until gadget no more energy left to know what I was doing properly... and dunno why my clove hitches on tt day esp. yi tuan zao? like nv even tightened liddat... I tink it was really the bowlining... really concentrated on making it perfect... sigh... now thinking of simple plan's perfect song... very fitting.
The interview... at least it went on smoothly, esp. now since got phobia of interviews after wadeva this year :P juz said I wanted to get in, said stuff I truly believed in, full stop. Some sqms believed tt ma'ams already had their dream team in mind, so they are pissed that ma'ams want every single one of us back for CT selection, coz some pple who didn't even turn up got in (they din turn up coz of real reasons la) and so for those who came but didn't get in, they felt it was a waste of time. I dun agree with them, but I dun have any reasons to rebutt them either. I really dun agree with them, but I can see why they think like that. It's juz that I believe in the opposite, and these kinda things, I dun think you need to justify your stand. You juz have a point-of-view, and you juz feel that way. As in, I dun tink it was a waste of time for everyone to come for the selection, but I don't know how to explain why.
After they announced the results, was too tired to feel disappointed. All I knew was that I wanted to go home and sleep. And maybe, it was because, I believe that (after reading this "Are you as happy as your dog?" book from shanghai) some things you ask for you get, some things you ask for you dun get, the most important thing was that you asked. And... if you remember not too long ago I asked for something I wanted very much and got it... so I tink it is only right that I shld not be asking for too much all the time. Like the lyrics from sheryl crow's soak up the sun, "it's not about getting what you want, it's wanting what you've got", I tink it's true.
It's only when I woke up next morning then I felt disappointed, and till now sometimes I feel there's something missing- after all it's been something I wanted since I knew campcraft, but... I believe that "a persons' destiny is controlled by the actions of themselves and others"- you can put in so much, but in the end, whether you get in or not is not decided by you, it's something you really dun have control over. So, save for the occasional pang of sadness, I am at peace.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 08:55 p.m. Sunday, December 7, 2003
*sigh. After writing the last entry, seems like, nothing else is worth saying anymore, like, tt's the most impt thing and since it's out, I'm satisfied :). Nvm juz write more la.
Next up... SLTC. Muz say that Meals Comm (or otherwise known as food.stress.com) very no camp life one, coz for the 4 days 3 nights all you do is to take care of the 5 meals a day, and cordial, that is available to the campers all the time, as if it is water liddat~ slack camp. First to wake up to prepare breakfast, last to sleep because of outdoor cooking debrief, last to eat every time because must serve everyone else first, and last to leave the camp because food needs the most clearing up, even after the closing ceremony blahz.
Even during the campfire, was up at the home econs room cooking green bean soup. (we have nice blue-coloured gas campfire! haha lame) And of course, the teacher ic of food com (hu everyone noes by now) who is super paranoid- everyday there would be something that we do wrong, in her eyes, and get scolded for it :P
But nvm- we had fun :) lotsa food com fun :) and I'm confident to say that we became very united as a group with the very noble mission of "feeding 80 pple for 4 days" ;) very memorable experience ya? jia shee, melissa, charlene, rachel and me! YOU ROCK FOOD.COM!
Coz of our busy food.com schedule, can hardly help other groups- but got manage to become a G.I. of Steady for one day- shufie and cheryl (tgy) inside- quite a nice friendly group of pple, but probably not used to camps and stuff... :S, then oso got help out in night orienteering. The first time I walked the route to reckee with the night orienteering pple, it was dark and quiet, so got more creepy fun atmosphere, on the actual day itself, kl made the atmosphere serious and solemn before the event itself- (so zai!) but when it comes to the actual thing itself... aiyaz... the MOE campsite had floodlights bright enough to light up the whole place until almost like nighttime in a normal housing estate liddat, and there was lotsa people and noise, totally spoil the atmosphere! and because there was not enough delay in the set-off timing between groups, end up have to wait for the group in front coz they are still at that station... sigh... not scary one...
Oh and the lodge the S.I.s stay in, so nice! They had bunk beds, about 20-plus of them, all in one room. Comfy mattress- I took the top bunk, shu zhen sleeping in the bed beside mine.
The first night, got this experience- I went to sleep on the top bunk at 2am, and the next thing I know (I swear it's like 1 second later) food commate mel is waking me up at 5.45- like never got the experience of sleeping at all ok! *so kek. I tink shld be fell asleep even before my head hit the pillow :s and then was sleepy for the whole of day 2- when ms ng showed us the demo for cooking chicken in outdoor cooking all of us were nodding off- and I thot we would get scolded for sleeping, budden she said " all of you tired ar? then you better go and sleep noe- else later you fall into the fire pit (got happened before) no joke noe! go and sleep, go!" and ended up we went back to the lodge and slept for 30 minutes at 10am while everyone else was pia-ing their com stuff, quite cool :) never thot this can happen in a camp :) so different.
I HATE THE DEBRIEFS. Some teachers must go on and on and on about fluffy airy stuff like What Is The Nanyang Culture? and What Can We Do To Develop A Nanyang Spirit? in the middle of the night when nobody is listening coz everyone is just thinking of sleep. Things that take at most 10 minutes to discuss, she can make it last for an hour. pei fu pei fu. So dragged on, lengthy... aiyoz... muz go wash face coz was nodding off :P stoopid.
The outdoor cooking was interesting coz it was gg style, muz use changkul dig this big pit in the ground, den no solid fuel, muz use dried leaves, twigs and fire starter, use big branch for pot stand, pot instead of messtin etc. turned out the food is nice- and the whole experience is a big eye-opener- budden it is too time consuming and tedious, quite fun anyway :)
Oops forgot to comment on the kayaking experience- yet another orientation on the different components of the kayak (hull, deck, portside, starboard... *yawn) and how to paddle... aiyoz 3rd orientation already. :S but the expedition itself is quite fun, but a bit the short, only from changi to pasir ris, not much compared to kayak whole of pulau ubin :) We had a bit the rainy weather the first time, budden it was fine weather on the expedition itself :D and according to the instructors, ( Yurong m and Danping m are instructors there! :D) the currents were in our favour all the way- so that was quite good :) oh and from changi beach can watch lots of planes fly, which juz take off from changi airport, and since they are still not that high up in the sky they are quite huge :o - plane watching shall become my next hobby :)
Overall a very different camp from np-style ones, more like lifeskills camp liddat, but more slack and less sian :) FOOD.STRESS.COM ROX!!
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 08:15 p.m. Sunday, December 7, 2003
I don't know who will be reading this... till today it has remained unknown by others. Don't know what others would think of what happened if I typed it here... Now I'm debating whether or not to put it here in the first place... okay. nvm.
To that very special person, I just want to say:
You would probably never get to read this, because I don't think you come here, though whether you do, I'm not sure. I just don't think you do.
I really, really cannot thank you enough. You sacrificed 3 hours of your sleep while still recovering from your throat operation, just to give me a hug one last time. I know I was supposed to try only your hp, but... I don't know whether you'll ever get to experience that feeling? Giving myself another minute, one at a time, feeling unsettled beneath a still and quiet facade, in the faint hope that you might pick up the phone? Sorry for calling your house in the end and waking up your dad... I really hope he's not angry... he really loves you, and he's concerned about me too; (not that my parents weren't when they allowed me out of the house at 10.30pm) and he was real nice the first time I came. Saw you shuffling out your house, barely awake, still coughing... felt really guilty then, but... didn't have any regrets for what I done... it's not contradictory... Thanks for the hug. A lot. You smell nice. *faint smile Thanks. It means a lot to me.
I was in the vicinity the day you left, kayaking in the sea. Watched the planes fly... I don't think you were on them but it was still symbolic. And, actually I feel this is the best way the situation can turn out- had you stayed on, you probably continue with your life as normal, gone to JC, U, job etc., and I would watch you change just like everyone else. I don't know how you are doing- hope you're fine, and because of this, the you I have in my mind would be unchanged forever as long as I don't see you again. You coming back next year? Fine :) Never coming back? That's fine by me too :). Don't worry about me anymore. I'll be fine. I promise. Just concentrate on having a happy life where you are now, meet new people, make new friends, continue with life there... maybe think about us back here from time to time? I dunno- up to you...
I believe that every persons' destiny is controlled by the actions of themselves and others, and not by fate. I think about how the actions of you, me and other people caused the events, the relationship, the everything... how someone still in her home country can know someone who seems to be living all over the world, and become so close when we're not supposed to, but sometimes special situations call for special measures, and... special people. And life is beautiful because we never thought it could start out like this, end up like this, and there are many other special twists of destiny still waiting to be discovered...
How's it there, by the way? Cold winter? You have a house in the suburbs like the one back here, or some apartment in the city centre? How's the people? Arnold Schwarzenegger? All the songs I know about the place you are in don't seem to paint a very pretty picture- but I really wouldn't know. You came from there, and don't seem to be like the people the songs describe... hahaz...
That's about all... actually this is just an expansion of the sms I sent you- couldn't write that much, and don't have so much time in SLTC. I promise I'll be fine. I won't cry.
We will meet in heaven, till then, there will always be dreams.
Thanks.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 03:55 a.m. Wednesday, December 3, 2003
Wow. Spent 50 minutes talking about Shanghai- and some more juz provided the skeleton- no meat one. I tink if write out everything in detail will need about 4 hours haha.
Go home, sleep for two nights, then is time for farewell liao. Some more right smack got SLTC meeting, and after meeting need to go shopping with Ms Ng :S to get the groceries to feed 80 people for 4 days. Took up the whole morning till evening. Feel quite bad didn't really help out in the preparations for farewell, coz of Shanghai and now SLTC preparations, but, later, hmm you find I'm actually quite proud of myself by the time farewell ended- go read on la.
This year got one third of the time lookout for ma'ams at the place near the noticeboard there, one third guard staircase, and one third guard breakthrough :) interesting :) rmb s1 dat time guard 3rd floor window and s2 guard breakthrough. Breakthrough smashed and B34 ma'ams came out one by one... she looked beautiful... her clothes always looked nice- high social standing + good fashion (art) sense + she grows up fast? Dunno. Dun tok about her liao la...
Serve food, serve drinks... den watch S2s fancy arms drill (impressive) and S1s magic show... (unique, refreshing) I tink ours was okay... coz we were all so busy and out of the country... but only okay... the lightsticks helped a lot :)
B34 ma'ams performance really took the cake- it's so... WOAH! yrm really sut eh... tink she chorographed the dance. Every ma'am was sut la actually :) After that was the song session- for the first time we get to sit next to the batch that's leaving. :) Like to lie on my back and watch the sky
Spent the whole night afterwards playing Bridge and a bit of Tai-ti. One conclusion- I can't play Bridge. Can lose to a bid of 6 clubs lor. But aniwae in the end got win some games :D jia you!
Give presents to Alpha ma'ams, get presents from our NCOs... by now sqms a bit the brain-dead alreadi... but I was quite determined to set my record- 3 years never slept a wink during farewell- made it :D Next year for B35's own farewell shall not sleep too :)
In the morning- everyone was tired- I tink some pple got cranky, and oso a bit unreasonable lor... if you are sleepy and go to home econs room juz to sit on a chair and stone while everyone else is busy washing plates and cleaning tables, that one fine, I still can take it, but I cannot take it when you start sitting there scolding people who are actually helping to clear up, when they throw away food that nobody will eat, that would otherwise rot till afternoon untouched anyway. And if you make a mistake, don't scold others for making the same mistake as you did. Please. *rolls eyes.
Went off to work with more co-operative people. And did the gooey smelly jobs with sqms who were more serious about clearing up. This is when I felt proud of myself- maybe for the preparations of farewell I didn't help much, but didn't slack for the actual farewell. But still slept at the bbq bench in the end. That was bad. Felt guilty. But that was after doing sooo much. Some pple been there since the day started.
Hmm won't end on such a sour note. Debriefed the S2s, did last minute tidying-up, went home and slept from 10am plus till 5pm. Woke up at 5pm, remembered something very important.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 03:27 a.m. Wednesday, December 3, 2003
Next up... Shanghai! Goodness that one will take me forever to write, and by the time I finish would have to archive this blog liao, so will only say the main highlights...
Fly SIA to Shanghai, 5h flight- watched Uptown Girls, chatted with Melissa (Lim) like v. good friends even though we never met before ;), played F1 racing, nice airline food, played tai-ti with SIA playing cards on the tray table (so fun!), sympathise the steward assigned to our cabin- whole time like got this forced smile as if he is irritated with our noisy cabin but still must provide some sorta courteous gracious service ;) quite shuai la- all stewards seem to be.
Touchdown in Shanghai- 15 degrees liddat- outdoor air-con! Sunset at 5pm. Looong drive to Fudan. Treated like exclusive VIP throughout the 2 weeks :D:D:D, lots of food, but oily and salty, takes some time to get used to. Nice comfy dorm on the 6th floor- no lifts, muz climb 6 floors everyday. Shared room with Sheryl from modern dance. Got attached bathroom, and big big TV! So happy!
1st day at school, the Fudan people ignored us, but around 3rd day or so, they suddenly become very friendly and interested, muz flip through all our resources and stuff :). Their classes all in Chinese one, some lesson got zzz... sometimes 3 of us, Sheryl, Shiru and I all zzz... sorry la, can't help it. They march like toy soldiers (sorry!) for PE, preparing for sports day (in such cold weather??). After school we would have enrichment lessons, like pottery and seal carving. Interesting!!! :D
Also got visit "landmarks" of Shanghai such as Shanghai musuem, (very boring, prefer to feed the fat pigeons there- they are so white, looks like doves- so beautiful!) Shanghai Grand Theatre, Pearl TV tower, The Bund etc. On those days feel so touristy liddat. When we are not eating hostel food, we have 10-12 course lunch and dinner at some fancy 5-star restaurant. Sometimes day after day. Feel really bad because we are eating so extravagantly every day and wasting tons of food while the beggars and homeless people in Shanghai have nothing to eat. :`(
We also wente to Suzhou to stay for 1 night- remember Suzhou Industrial Park, Sg invested inside? It's a failure, and they still call it a success :P Still muz go and visit there- looks like a ghost town, few cars, few people... absolutely boring.
We also got go Zhou Zhuang, supposed to be this Venice of the East, would look like a romantic place, just that the water is very polluted. :( Tour of old houses and gardens boring, but there can buy lots of trinkets and knick-knacks, for sqms, frens etc. and also can bargain a lot! But bargaining skills not very good, working on it tho. Quite fun, but dun believe in bargaining too much either. You slash 10 yuan off the price, to you you save $2.50, (not much considering you have about $200 to spend) to them they lost 10 yuan. And please la, you are not as poor as them. But still must have sense, else these poor people will rip you off and fleece all your money.
Visited Agriworld too, almost closing time so very rushed, got no time to properly explore the place... and I fell in love with the Mongolian horses- got this rugged, wild look :) Grow up shall keep Arabian and Mongolian horses- they are the most beautiful of all. The piglets are cute! Muz show xw and wx ;)
Bo Ai School- gives me the deepest impressions in the whole Shanghai trip. It's a school for children with cerebral palsy, some of the kids there, can't walk, can't talk, but they try soooooooo hard, just to do daily activities we take for granted. And they are still very happy and cheerful, more enthu than us about the visit... sometimes feel xin ge le yi ba dao, (heart got cut one knife) almost cried, but seeing them so cheerful, optimistic and brave about life despite their disabilities, must be strong for them too. Got cried once, when one of the kids I was in charge of got hurt and cried, but told myself yao yong gan... which is something I learnt from them. yao yong gan...
That night, we stayed at Lakeside Hotel, 4*! Sheryl and me again- Yi-you and Emily next door :) Put on 5kg so far! goodness. Nice feeling to stay in hotel room without parents, got kope the shampoo, soap, sewing kit ;) Bed is comfortable and warm.
Also went to Shanghai Aged University, (huo dao lao, xue dao lao) elderly people go there learn stuff like choir (damn pro!), guzheng, crochet, english, digital piano etc. Grow up muz go retire there, will have lotsa frens to keep me company
We also did some shopping, at places like Nanjing Rd and Huaihai Rd, their leaflet-giving out people are much, much more aggressive than those in Sg :S- some can harass you one lor. And muz beware of pickpockets. Not much to buy- every store sells winter clothes. Got some shoes and bags too la, but not interested- not enough luggage space liao.
Company visit to Jack's Place and Ikea- bread and soup at JP is nice!- ordered more coz there was free flow but spaghetti is quite inedible. Wanted to buy stuff at IKEA but the teachers won't let us- they didn't schedule time for it. Want to go to Xiang Yang Market again- there got even better bargains than Zhou Zhuang, and seems like more variety too- never got the chance to buy the stuff I want coz everytime we go there is 1) scavenger hunt, only got time to buy stuff the Little Entrepreneur pple wanted, 2) buy stuff for our sale in beginning of year to raise funds for Bo Ai School.
The real scavenger hunt, is such an eye-opener man! Really got to know about Shanghai, and got to mix with everyday Shanghai people. Though we didn't get in first, never mind. Our group B1 offered to do the forfeit with B3, then one by one, B2 and B4 also joined in, so in the end all the Fudan people do, and B3 was so touched :)
Last day, panel discussion at Jin Yuan- not for our level la, so intellectual- even the teachers sleeping liao. It was freeeeezing - 4 degrees ! Open the topmost part of your fridge, (the part to make ice) imagine it upsized so that you can walk into it, and go in wearing only two layers of clothing- you get the idea :)
Last chance to grab stuff for myself, Shanghai Airport. There got Watsons- bought this sheep for RMB 19.90. Looks so cute! I think light blue is a nice colour. Yellow makes the sheep look like got Afrohair liddat (nothing bad abt it, juz looks weird on a sheep) and pink makes it look like it is cotton candy. Her name is meh-meh. :)
Flight back home, a bit the sian la. Everybody is tired, then think of Sg, even more sian lor. We took a flight at 3.15pm, (no time difference) and watched sunset at 5pm on the plane! If you are a sunrise/sunset fan like me, muz watch sunset on the plane! The sun never sets for a few hours, because you are travelling towards the sun. Behind you is darkness, and in front is sunset, and it continues for a few hours. Such a special moment :) Watched You Got Mail :) I asked for International Cuisine the cabin crew gave me Oriental Cuisine- aiyah, not bad la.
Our baggage carousel was no. 35! woo-hoo :) gl and hy also came back on the 22nd of Nov, from Shenyang, and about same time too- met them at the airport, and big hug! Such a happy moment- didn't want to come back Sg at first, but now glad to be home. And see my family even happier :) Go home already 12 midnight liao. Muz go Shanghai ok? Nice experience!
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 02:34 a.m. Wednesday, December 3, 2003
Now shall move on to Chinese O levels. Can't remember much la- so long ago... if I'm not wrong my ying yong wen was impressive (for my standard) zuo wen ok... spent the next 4 hours studying the shou ce until I never wanted to look at another chinese word in the shou ce again... haha... made stupid careless mistakes, but overall the paper quite easy la. So deliriously happy when the paper ended, because no more exams for the year :) went home and catch up on sleep, then can't remember what happened after that.
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 02:21 a.m. Wednesday, December 3, 2003
Let's see... let's juz start from my bdae la- yay thanx for all the prezzies- famous amos cookies are delicious and aromatic ;), but the chocolate cakes from sweet secrets a bit the squashed when I got home :S:S:S and next time buy Prima Deli cakes la! :) but sweet secrets quite nice also- one year had tt kinda cake for my bdae... hmmm daddy facing stiff competition hor...
and on that day I was also thinking about everyone who helped to make sure I got to experience my 15th birthday... v. thankful :) so I decided to spend my 15th year paying it forward (smth like tt show?), bit by bit, tho I dun tink I can ever "repay" them enough.
Oh and I remember still mugging for Chinese O levels in 2 days... haha
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 02:15 a.m. Wednesday, December 3, 2003
Heyhey! Like this new blog layout! The last month has been whirlwind busy, no time even to go back home, let alone sleep, let alone sit down in front of the com, let alone reformat my blog, k you get the idea.
Before I go on, muz tell you that sometime in Nov Pitas kinda crashed real bad and so a lot of my entries disappeared :s -> the ones about the individual eoy papers. Oh well hu cares- that seems so faraway now, got more important things liao.
And... I guess dun separate np blog and main blog anymore la. Can't really keep them as separate lives liao, dun really tink of them as separate lives liao anyway, and a bit the troublesome to update two blogs... you want you can still go there la, tho it's haven't been updated for few months.
Though it's now 2.12am in the morning, muz update update update... 1 month of v. interesting once-in-a-lifetime events... goodness... ya so muz type down somewhere :)
Don't shortchange yourself of happiness at 02:07 a.m. Wednesday, December 3, 2003