Saturday, July 30, 2005, 12:23 a.m.

i had so much fun with the gals. it has been awhile, missing some but it was still great. but right now, i'm feeling sick, till the stomach. too much smokes me think. gosh, what am i doing to my body?

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Friday, July 29, 2005, 03:56 p.m.

and for the record, i'm not bloody rich neither was i born with a silver, gold or whathaveyou spoon in my mouth. i am contented and grateful as it is. just because i'm going to europe or wherever in the world, that does not make me a bloody rich person. i saved my ass off, thank you very much. no shopping,no movies, no luxurious indulgence or whatever nice things we all love to spend our money on. when i want something, i work towards it. there is such a thing called self control, self discipline. if i'm rich, i dont need to wait and save my ass off for 7 months. if i'm rich, i wld have jetset to wherever i desire, as and when i feel like it and oh, if i'm rich, i wld be jetsetting in my very own private jet, painted in my favourite colours. so get this, i'm not bloody rich and i dont brag.

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Wednesday, July 27, 2005, 10:48 p.m.

final 2 assignments submitted. i can breathe and take things easy now. unofficially, i'm done with school. graduation is in april 06. feeling a little lost now though. feels weird not having something to work on. i feel weird and restless when i have nothing to do. but at least now i can occupy my time preparing for the trip. after 7 months of planning and waiting, it is drawing near. the excitement is not at its peak yet. it will be when i am finally on my way. half packed...betul punye malas.

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It wouldnt have happened if...
Thursday, July 21, 2005, 01:18 p.m.

This caught my attention. I couldnt help but uttered "true, true, true..." in my heart as I read on. I would like to know what Blair, Bush and other Western leaders have got to say.

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Sunday, July 17, 2005, 12:12 p.m.

Design courtesy of Zee

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Friday, July 8, 2005, 01:55 p.m.

a lot things came to mind and i've wanted to blog abt them. but you know, along the way, they just disappeared or forgotten. so most likely,now, i will blog abt the more recent ones. of course, the most recent/latest news is the blasts in london.when i first heard it on the radio, it didnt bother me that much and since the news was still fresh, i was skeptical with the details and information. nevertheless, i surfed through the net for more info.still i wasnt too convinced.i was telling shila that they are probably exaggerating things. you know, the media. i got home and my dad told me the death toll.i was to purchase my flight tixs to london and mallorca today and this had to happen. i was thinking abt it before i went to sleep. surprisingly, my mum didnt say anything though she knew that i'll heading to the british capital next month. usually, u know, mothers. received gerri's email and he told me to go ahead and purchase the tixs. of course, that email came before blast. i wonder how is he coping with things there. it's not too worrying coz he was in italy when it happened but it's the aftermath that we are concerned about.i called anne and we talked abt it for a bit. just like what redzuan mentioned this morning, they wont strike again.i went ahead to purchase the tickets. for now, i shall keep abreast with the updates but not too much i think cause it'll turn me into one paranoid girl.

Last nite, I couldnt help but laughed at my parents, whom every Thursday nite after their prayers and all, religiously placed themselves in front of the telly, with full willingness to be absorbed into the world of the Indonesian soap opera Dia II. I have to admit that few weeks back, I decided to join them (after seeing the same scenario every Thurs and naturally i want to know more especially since it's the No. 1 most watched drama on Suria) but kept telling myself never to be drowned/influenced or whathaveyous by the craze. I never even watched a single episode from the first season. but from the weeks i started to watch, it's so easy to list down the plot, pattern and storyline, the whole damn formula adopted by the directors, producers and storywriters. an article written by hanim mohd salleh, a berita harian writer, says it all. i couldnt help but agreed. the storyline was being stretched and dragged for far too long, too long till the point of frustration. but that's the main factor to keep the audience wanting more and it seems to be successful. my parents can even create their own storylines based on every scenario. i'm lazy to go into details (some of you may not understand what i'm sprouting about anyway) but i couldnt help laughing last nite becoz the end of the season 2 was so, so expected. with such an abrupt ending, i bet many felt so cheated and i wonder how many true fans are really still real fans and how many kena heart attack ..oooops! all i could say to my parents last nite was "habis....mesti banyak orang complain kat Suria" (if they bother, that is or they shall wait patiently for the third season) LOL!!!!!we'll see if the next drama who features the same so called hearthrob, Ari Wibowo will have the same effect. it's so funny how the commentary was made at the end. i think it goes sumthing like this "musim kedua DIA sudah berakhir. Tapi anda masih dapat bersama Ari Wibowo di dalam......" again, LOL!!!!! suria takut kena complain kot!!! again, LOL!!!! i'm actually panting after typing everything above. it's unnecessary isnt it. takpe, nak jugak

on a more solemn note, my deepest condolences and heartfelt to huda and fiza and their families on the demise of their beloved grandmother on Monday.

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Thursday, June 30, 2005, 05:52 p.m.

this is a plea from a helpless gal to the love of her life who is thousand miles away...

baby, pls come home and help me go through all these. it's too overwhelming.i'm on the verge of breaking down and losing control :(

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Monday, June 27, 2005, 11:53 p.m.

since the last entry, i'm still smiling and i guess i'll go to bed smiling. why? becoz haris just called me. i dunno what's up with the swedes today. i spoke to both of them in a day. but it was nice to hear haris' voice again. with both of them calling me today, it only got me all excited and anxious to see them again :)

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Monday, June 27, 2005, 04:38 p.m.

I couldnt stop smiling now coz ron juz called me a while ago. at this hour, an overseas call would be either from shila or perhaps from that guy in solomon island who has been trying to reach me and whom i ignored religiously. it couldnt be texas boy coz he's probably in slumberland at the other side of the globe.Then, it was this deep, male voice which is all so familiar. bloody hell it was ron. all i could afford was "oh my god!" oh my god!" i thought it was haris coz ron wldnt want to waste his money to call me, so I thought. so yea it was ron allrite. he's not at work coz he didnt sleep at all last night and thought of calling me. our short teleconversation due to the expensive rates was good enough to get the both of us excited coz we are going see each other again very soon. bloody hell, it's nice to hear his voice all over again. I'm still smiling...

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Sunday, June 26, 2005, 04:23 p.m.

I felt so shitty after my teleconversation with him earlier in the day. there was a heavy pang in my heart. i was reminded again of my fear and that made me scared all over again. yes, i wanna be selfish. sumtimes i just had to. sumtimes it's all too overwhelming for me. if you dun understand, who else would? oh,fuck.

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Saturday, June 25, 2005, 08:55 p.m.

it's been work,home and assignments for me the past weeks. of course there were the occasional activities such as hosting the Northeast CDC Goes Middle East at Kovan hub, sumptuous seafood dinner in JB with my ex colleagues,hanging out with friends in between to keep me from going insane. have not been meeting up with my butterflies for a while now. miss them loads. shils is back in london after too much basking in the spanish sun. she will reach sg on wed morning. finally! she will miss out on huda's birthday dinner tomorrow. its ok, we can always have another meeting anytime.

so yea, nothing much really. i'm taking far too long to work on this essay and it's not good i think. not forgetting, there's too much procastination. but i'm almost there. once this is done, i need to complete the other 2 by end of july. then i'll have time to settle watever things that have been left unsettled so that i can leave for the trip with no worries.

it was nice to chat with richard earlier just now. it is a rare occassion to have him online. that boy is still up and running, travelling that is. he's in laos now. i'm really hoping that he will be back in london by aug so that we can meet up. he told me that his mum is going crazy, with him being away and all. he supposed to be back in march which obviously didn't happen.ron and i talked abt our plans in dec/jan. will talk more when we meet in aug. oh yea, haris is really turning japanese. dunno what its going to be like to hear him conversing in japanese. hahaha. miss those boys...

soon,this boring, mundane stage of my life will be over. it wont be long till i let my hair down and lose myself. hahaha. i've come this far and this is my final chance to give my best. it's already end of June and that means another month of sufferings and that's it. i'll get to see those faces i've missed so much once again. when i come back, it'll be another 'anticipation month', longing to see the face of that someone i truly missed most. it's pretty exciting and nerve wrecking at the same time.

my hari raya outfit is ready. i thought it's kinda funny. coz what works for me every year is that either i get a ready made one at the very last minute or dun even bother to get a new one. couldnt recall when was the last time i have a tailored one. so yea, this yr i had mine tailored. materials and tailor courtesy of mummy. somehow i'm pretty excited to see the final product but cant find time to make my way to the tailor. slowly but surely. i'll find time unless i want the auntie to sell my outfit off. yea right.

excuse me now as i turn my attention to the bloody essay. till the next entry. oh congrats to nad for winning at pesta perdana. have not met up with that gal for quite a bit now.

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Sunday, June 12, 2005, 07:47 p.m.

Hiatus from the blogging world only means that I was too occupied with other important things. 1 assignment done, 3 major ones to go and after that I can smile ear to ear and free as a bird and can start preparing for the trip. nigel extended the deadlines but of course i gotta finish them up by end of july.

in between, i couldnt help feeling all excited coz texas boy is coming home, in abt 3 mnths time to be exact!!! just hope that there will be no changes or whatsoever. with him coming home also means i've lost the hair deal we made sumtime back. i was so overconfident that i'm going to win. he actually hid it from me all this while. no wonder, all the pics he sent me before, most of the time he put his snowcap. then he said he had his hair cropped, his usual style coz it was so hot there and no wonder he mentioned about hair conditioner when he never use it. all because he actually kept his hair!!! he wanted to surprise me when he gets back. he even planning to surprise me abt his return. but knowing him, he cant keep surprises for long. same goes for me. thats why we are never good at surprising each other coz we cant stand the itch to tell each other.so there you go. texas boy sports a new hairdo now. i forced him to send me pics and when i first saw them, i couldnt help but laugh and laugh. not because he looks ugly but he looks so different. throughout our 5 and half years together, he never had long hair.it was always the usual 'botak' style.he requested me not to upload the pics here. very self conscious. he was already making so much noise when i told him that i showed his pics to amirul and anne.nak feeling surprise eh

with abt 3 mnths left in the US, he continued to make me jealous coz he will be attending more gigs. the other nite, he was at bloc party's gig. soon, he will be checking out the killers, keane, oasis, coldplay, jet, ozzyfest and many more. he said if there's one thing that he will miss abt being in the US, it will be attending gigs and what do we get to enjoy here in sg? nothing really. it's been pretty quiet this year dun u think? oh well b, enjoy while it lasts and take lots of pics pls

last week, i spent 3 days going through the induction programme over at my new unit. nizam was nice enough to show me around. i received a warm welcome and everybody seems nice and friendly. tomorrow, i guess i'll get to learn more about my new job scope. i dunno what to expect really. it's a total change. but my new boss has been great so far and i've heard nice things abt him. he seems to be very encouraging. it's abt time i have a good boss. just hope that he wont be posted out anytime soon and i'll pick things up quickly and get comfortable. it seems mundane but can be rather challenging. we'll see where will i go from here. wish me luck!

b, thank you for 'shopping' with me today. 3 more months baby and i'll see you again (with the new hairdo)

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Wednesday, June 1, 2005, 04:12 p.m.

aaaahhh...finally able to find time to write here. i've been so busy with so many things. usually, i like it but now i feel like as if i'm running of time to do everything. i hate myself for procastinating too much especially with current assignments. this is final leg and I'm getting lazier when I should be the opposite. then when the deadline is drawing near, I will freak myself out and get all panicky.ape aje

lets see what else I've been up to. hhmmm... i cant remember much now but this one, yes I remembered. last Sunday was a blast coz I finally got to meet up with nan, salim, su, nad, andz and more ppl at the northeast cdc "Quit" concert where they were the organisers. my main reason for being there was them and of course ning baizura. i tried to be useful and helped out a bit here and there but most of the time either i was snapping pictures or bitching. met greta after for so long. she was one of the MCs. a little fleshy now but still as gorgeous as before. she didnt recognized me at first. She said i looked different. probably due to the hair or sumthing coz throughout our poly days i had short hair.

it was raining heavily earlier. the field was muddy and all but the crowd was a strong coz why? they wanted to see taufik, slyvester, rui en and ning baizura whom as usual made appearances only during the later part of the concert. standard procedure at all shows. d'kruz, as usual put up a great show. BFC did well too. oh yea, 4 little girls who called themselves Mummy's Angels stole my heart. They were so cute that I wanna eat them up. You should see them danced to hip hop numbers in their red and white outfits, with make up of course and hair braided. no comments abt sly, dia mcm cengkerik,rui en was pretty and that was about it. fique, as usual turned the crowd on, tak kuasa sangat sebab hari2 pun tengok muka dia what he said to me during the phototaking was funny tho. but of course the highlight of the night was to be able to meet Ning Baizura, up close and personal, very, very close to the extent of hug hug and kiss kiss. our brief exchange of "likings" towards each other after the phototaking was funny too.

Ning: I like your hair
Me: Thank you. I like your outfit (she was wearing this gorgeous black top with black satin flowy pants and blackshimmering belt)
Ning: Girl, ni satu suit tau. I cuma tambah belt aje.

I told the rest abt it later and everybody was laughing. Ning Baizura was very sweet and very friendly, much slimmer in person. oh yea she also took the opportunity to promote her fan club based in Singapore. It's called Ning Clix.i forgot the email address and i shall not reveal nan's joke relating to that. hahaha. you want to know, ask me k. we went for supper after that. it was nice catching up and as usual it was filled with fun and laughter.dah lama tak kaykek. best!will put up the pics soon.

on monday nite, me and the gals went to check out shils'performances. I thought she did better during her poem reading. we went for coffee after that to catch up and chill. too bad couldnt send shils off to london coz her flight was at 5am and it's a working day.tak kuasa eh

The past week or so, I have finally have music as companion when I'm on the move. courtesy of texas boy, iRiver H320 is my latest toy (tho I'm jealous coz he got himself an Ipod Photo, hmmph). Also, I've been enjoying or should I say donning and parading all the other things that came along with the MP3 player in that huge box. it was too overwhelming. *hint hint* pls do not get me bags for my birthday coz I have loads of them now. I love every single thing that he got me. thanks babe. i shall now wait patiently for the second huge parcel eh. hehehe

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