Click here to know more.
Friday, Feb 28, 2003
8.42am :
i met up with suhana on wed for dinner.she looked damn good and matured wearing the hijab.did lots of catching up since we have not meet up for so long.most of the time we were talking about marriage, well actually its more on her desperately wanting to settle down.hehehe.she wants that to happen when she turns 24 which is like in 2 yrs time.But she told me that the problem lies with her boyfriend,Zahid.Zahid has a stable job, doing well and all but he still thinks that he need to save up more and be more prepared to go on to the next phase.She asked me about my plans and i just told her that it wont be that too soon but of course i would love for it to happen.dating is tiring.Suhana is still the wonderful, cheerful girl and i love her so much.my best friend since primary 2 and we share and tell each other practically about everything under the sun.she promised me that i'll be her bestman on her wedding day :)
Thursday, Feb 27, 2003
8.49am :
so the truth is out.he has nothing to hide anymore.but the truth wasnt from him, it came from so many people who have known it for so long but kept silent coz they dun wanna to interfere.but still, it wont help if he continue to keep mum about everything.pls, pls open up and tell us everything.my sis suffered too much and pls dun continue to torture her with all your lies.Your mum is too be blamed.i suggest that you pack your bags and go back to your dear mum.Becoz of her, you are what you are today.In the past, i didnt take any sides and i couldnt be bothered.But things gone too far and i believe i have the right to know.Now i know the truth and i'm wise enough to judge things.i'm not the little baby in the family anymore.For the past 6 years or so, i never see you contribute to parenthood.Your kids grew up in front of my parents and myself.Who attended to them when they cried in the wee hours for milk or change of diapers? who were there when Kiki had to undergo all that dreaded eye surgeries? Who were there to give all the strength and support to my sis when she had to go thru all the trauma? and it goes on. You will never be in the picture, neither do your materialistic, selfish mother and your 2 brothers who were blinded from the shit your mum did to my family. They will keep on thinking that their mother is their goddess.I dun blame them.She is their mother afterall.But one thing for sure, my family is strong and we stick together no matter what.You and your family will lose out.Our patience and endurance will cease you out.The shit you and your family did to us will never deter us from being the happy family.We've always been and we will always be.I will remember not to do all the things your mum did when i'm a mother myself.
btw, i'm really fine. thanks for asking.dun worry abt anything.thanks for the concern.love you all.
Wednesday, Feb 26, 2003
9.48am :
i was very,very angry last night.i believe that things had gone too far and sumthing need to be done. I dun want to see my sis and my mum suffer becoz of an irresponsible man..no he shouldnt be called a man, he should be called a beast.I swear i'll not let him go if anything happens to my sis.he brought us too much trouble already.he should go.
Tuesday, Feb 25, 2003
10.04am :
managed to watch the Grammys yesterday morning.Norah Jones grabbed most of the awards.I was so happy.She looked so humble and nervous every single time she went up to receive her Grammy.I'm so in love with her music.
The WITS presentation was over and i guessed everything went well.I really hope that we didnt make it.In fact, most of us wanted things to screw up or sumthing.We couldnt be bothered to compete in the SPF level.Waste of time and effort.
Kak Ita was discharged yesterday.The doctors said her leg is fine, nothing is wrong.Weird isnt it? I mean, her leg was swollen and the skin was peeling off! Hhhhmmm...i really dunno whats wrong.but i'm glad she's getting better.
i'm still out of focus...shall not go on rambling...
Sunday, Feb 23, 2003
12.11am :
met up with matno,huda and shila earlier.was so happy to see matno once again after for so long...he was in kl attending some theatre workshop there for 6 months or so.still look the same except that he lost a lot of weight.lots of catching up, jokes and had a good laugh.we'll meet up again. i miss going on shopping with him.
kak ita was warded at sgh.its her legs.i dunno whats up, will find out when i visit her tomorrow.her legs were swollen and part of the skin was scaly.gosh..i hope its not too serious.it all started when she fell at pulau ubin while cycling.i suspected sumthing got to do with infections or allergy.
Saturday, Feb 22, 2003
12.21pm :
so umam is not going back today.he extended his stay till next weekend.yippee!nan is performing today at np but too bad i couldnt make it coz i gotta babysit my newphews.was cleaning my workstation and found the apology poem from matno.it was during that period when he suddenly disappeared from my life and when he knew about how i felt, he wrote me that poem.meeting him on monday.i miss him real bad.
Friday, Feb 21, 2003
8.52am :
umam is going back to brisbane tomorrow afternoon.2 weeks passed juz like that.i wish i can spend more time with him.he means a lot to me.my trip to brisbane in march has to be put off coz of werk and some other reasons.i'm gonna miss him real bad.
i'm very,very,very tired.maybe because i've not been sleeping well for the past week or so.drops of lavender oil on my pillow didnt help.soothing music didnt help either.i always wake up the next morning with an aching body and heavy head.i woke up several times in the night and my mind was awake.this is getting to me and i want it to stop.this morning, i felt like i'm getting down with something.last night i was nauseous, felt bloated and vomitting but i refrain myself from that coz when you do so, it sux.maybe i'm just not healthy. anybody wants to share some tips to a good night sleep?
Thursday, Feb 20, 2003
5.28pm :
so almost everybody has a blog and the best part is that theirs look good..with pictures and all.perhaps i should allocate one day to revamp my site..(if i can do it lah) *sigh* i'm feeling so jealous but at the same time lackadaisical..how?
Thursday, Feb 20, 2003
9.34am :
I really hate checking my mails after being away from the office.things were just being thrown at me non-stop.After the 3 days course, i really dun want to go back to work.but i guess i should just stop whining and complaining now and get things organised and done soon.i'm out of focus though.
met up with everybody on tuesday night.md nuh's call came as a surprise and shock.he's back in sg.he has been in kl for the past 1 yr doing some crash course in performing arts and stuff like that.we waited for him but he didnt turn up.i dunno what to expect from him after for so long or maybe there's no need to.i just want to sit with him and let him do the talking...the truth.we'll meet soon.
fiza got that job at SIA and i'm so happy for her.finally a permanent job.hope she'll enjoy it.all the best girlfren.
last night when i went over to B's, someone new greeted me.a cute, adorable black persian cat.B's bro found it on the 7th floor and brought it home.Adik cat wasnt too happy and sulked and hid himself in the kitchen.we had a tough time looking all over the house for him.B is still contemplating whether to keep the persian cat or maybe just let it go.we dun even know whether she belongs to anybody in the neighbourhood.B is beginning to fall in love with her. Come to think about it, i think it is only wise for owners to put on collars on their pets, displaying information such as name of the cat, address and stuff like that.it would be more convenient and less stressful.
i saw the pics on mimi's blog and suddenly i realised i've not been to any indie gigs or any gigs for that matter for a very long long time.i miss those days and i miss the whole lot of people...sab,akira,wan,siti and the list goes on.dunno whether they feel the same way too.oh yes,i miss my niece and nephew..nina and helmi.i miss so many people.i miss everything when i was 17,18,19,20...
Monday, Feb 17, 2003
8.22pm :
had a good weekend, though i was really sick and kinda of bedridden on saturday.my flu was horrible.i was already so sick on friday but yet managed to meet up and chill with everybody.was much feeling much better yesterday and went out for lunch with B, his mum, sister and 2 cousins at far east plaza.then we did window shopping, had desserts ar marche then B decided to do the arcade and pool ...hahaha he said its been quite some time since he does all that...i was quite against the arcade part but nevertheless did enjoy myself 'shooting the dead","fighting enemies in the tank battle, daytona racing thru the easy circuit on auto mode, i won : )...damn funny.
attended a "Managing relations with others" course today and it will go on till wednesday.rather interesting and interactive class.as usual, i'm the youngest and has the least number years of service in spf.hahaha...some have been in the force for like 30 years or so.1st day was more of a sharing and discussing session.rather interesting when everybody shared their experiences and all.class tend to get a little noisy especially when it comes to "who is better? men or women?" are we equal?" there are some really gung ho ladies in the class mind you.we'll see whats up next tomorrow.
gosh, marcus is on air rite now, on power98.his voice or should i say he is irritating.i think he's trying very hard to be a joker.back in school,i never really favour him.corny and lame jokes are all he is capable of.still cant believe he made it to power98...*sigh*..well but at least..he's "there" *sigh*
Friday, Feb 14, 2003
8.55am :
another nice day last night.met up with shak,nan,baeem,azila,vu and some of the hip hop boys.was developing some kind of a sore throat but really had good laugh.Vu is such a darling.love to see her sweet face..love shak's Nikon digi cam.i am so gonna get one for myself...she got it for a good price plus a free discman some more.we are all meeting up again tonite..hopefully the whole gang will be there.it will be fun.
woke up with a running nose and my throat is getting bad to worse.feel like taking mc today but gotta attend that damn meetin cum dialogue session.aarrrrggghhhh....
Thursday, Feb 13, 2003
4.27pm :
juz finished reading Tony Parson's Man and Boy.very moving,realistic and heart wrenching. love this particular quote Love means knowing when to let go
this came almost at the end of the book.The main character in the book, Harry Silver just lost his dad and he was asking his mum on how she could take it and move on.That was what exactly she said to him. Kinda true huh...
Thursday, Feb 13, 2003
9.14am :
i'm totally annoyed with myself. I kept misplacing my cds.Some cases are empty whereas some cds are not suppose to be where they are now.my room is in a mess and i'm pissed with myself for being lazy.i need to do sumthing fast...
this newsletter thingy is driving me crazy and my boss is not helping.damn it...guess today will be whiny day for me.i'm beginning to lose focus now.
Wednesday, Feb 12, 2003
9.26pm :
Beautiful day today.Saw the Kaabah on telly and i so want to be in Makkah rite now :) Nursing a full tummy rite now.food galore the whole day.Mak Lang's mee rebus was superb and i just had to have my second helping.At Mama's, i forced myself to eat a little rice, ayam masak merah and daging korban (cooked into satay goreng) and not forgetting her epok2 and koyanku jellies.At Mak Mi's, tried to refrain myself but still i ate 1 or 2 loveletters.Abg Arip was at home and he showed us his keris (daggers) collection, some dated back as far as thousand of years ago.Some were owned by Malay kings, warriors and stuff like that.He has about over 200 keris in his house,most of them are displayed.To date, he spent about 80k for all the keris.It is indeed an expensive hobby.
back to work tomorrow, sigh...i'm still stuck with the production of that "staying in control" newsletter.i just dunno where to start.I have to come up with about 3 articles and i dun even know what to write.Damn, damn...
Tuesday, Feb 11, 2003
8.44am :
last night, was out with Najib.had dinner at ah chew then did a little window shopping.bumped into jeff and gf and his gf turned out to be my ex primary schoolmate.no wonder she looked damn familiar.we had a good talk..she's quite chatty and we talked as if we've known each other for ages.the best part she lives 3 blocks away and we never see or bump into each other.what a small world isnt it. btw, her name is Haslin.this i never know coz i only see her around school and thats it.she was 1 yr my senior and was in the same class with Fiza.She's gonna be a teacher soon.Everybody seems to be teaching nowadays.(Fiza, do u remember her?)Baem should know her too.Nice...
Monday, Feb 10, 2003
9.52am :
last night,woke up several times, feeling so angry.Thus,this morning,finally woke up feeling so irritated, tired and sleepy.hhhmmm....
Sunday, Feb 9, 2003
6.00pm :
Yesterday was a tiring but a fun-filled day.Met up with Shak after for so long...she looked good allright.We had lunch at Amiran's,did a little catching up and all before making our way down to the Wu bar for PLATFORM, organized by Nan.I was in my slackiest mode, a tank top, drawstring pants,slippers..all black.i looked like i'm right out of bed.(and shak, i dun look hot at all tau). was glad though that i was underdressed coz the kids really dolled themselves up for the occassion.Yeah, kids...young crowd there but it was a good turnout and the whole show was a success.i thought the youngest kid in the crowd would be 13 or maybe 12 yrs old.PLATFORM was indeed a great opportunity for those hip hoppers who have been longing to perform and show their thing.The performances dun really get into me coz i dun really dig hip hop but i must admit that some were super duper good, while some were disappointing and rather annoying.Deadleft(Yadin & Anaiz) & Mac did very well.Justone & Ping got me moving to their jazzy,funky number.While the rest was purely hip hop.felt so good to be in the company of my frens, been quite some time since i let myself drowned in all the actions.i went home a happy bunny.oh yeah, Rama is damn funny.he shouldnt be in Triple Noize.he should have his own talk show or sumthing...
Saturday, Feb 8, 2003
8.41am :
i had my 5 rolls of film developed last night but was rather disappointed coz my lomo pics didnt turn out really well.in fact, both rolls were empty!!! i dunno what happened, probably sumthin is wrong with my LCA. so,so disappointed.
dinner last night was rather quiet.B had nothing much to say and so was i.Guessed he was too freaking tired and sleepy coz he didnt get any sleep at all after werking nite shift the day before.poor boy, you should have juz heed my advice to stay home and sleep.as for me, blame it on PMS.i was easily agitated.For the fact i knew that it was due to all the hormones in me and no matter how hard i tried to snap out of it or not to succumb to it..i failed.damn irritating.
definitely not looking forward to work today.but i have to finish up the write up and all for the coming WITS presentation.*sigh*
Friday, Feb 7, 2003
9.09am :
met up with matno last night.he said he needed to talk and we did...we talked about so many things...and he got me thinking once again about Melbourne.*sigh* I managed to sms B to ask how does he feel about me going away for 4 years.His reply was "then i'll need to get meself a new computer" (His current PC is a bitch, good enuff to be given away to the karung guni) His innocent reply made me laughed out loud coz it's funny and at the same time, he made me fall in love with him all over again.B is cool about everything,way too cool, never let emotions get to him.I'm worried about my parents though, especially my mum.I knew she's all worried about expenses and all and i'm trying very hard to assure her that things are doing just fine, no worries.I did talk to my sis and hopefully, she can give the same assurance to my mum.Well, we'll see how it goes...
Thursday, Feb 6, 2003
2.50pm :
There's sumthing about the colour of my pita.I feel like chewing it...hhhmmmm....
Thursday, Feb 6, 2003
8.56am :
Now that i know, i shall work towards it.it's not easy but with His blessings, insya-allah i can make it through.I want to make it happen, not just words and thoughts.
Wednesday, Feb 5, 2003
8.52am :
what a cold cold morning.i wanna go back to bed...it would be nice to lie in the arms of my beloved
I've been having indian food for the past 2 days.the chappati from har yasin, along changi road was good.B and I had dinner there after making our purchases from Toko Wijaya.Now,I'm craving for Italian food and the korean buffet at Seoul Garden...
I've been doing lots of thinking these days...been thinking and thinking and thinking...
btw, i tried to enlarge the font size but somehow it affected the measurement of my entries. how do i make the right column(the entried column) bigger?
Tuesday, Feb 4, 2003
8.58am :
back to work after a long weekend.didnt have a good night last night.i can foresee a busy month, several projects in hand.Accompanying B later to Joo Chiat.He has been making purchases from Toko Wijaya.
i just realised that i have 5 rolls of films...lying around, collecting dust..i shall get them developed asap.i dunno what they contain.probably, my b&w and lomo pics and my trip to genting...
Monday, Feb 3, 2003
11.41am :
My CNY weekend has been great.Umam is back and gonna be in sg for about 3 wks or so.He is thinner and smaller.His return was a surprise one.Nan who was the one who broke the news to me and i was like couldnt believe it.i mean i just sms him about me going to brisbane in march and was so worried why he didnt reply.my trip to brisbane in march may have to be aborted coz he said it's summer there and it is so freakin hot..40 degrees and ppl are dying from heatwave.matno and usop are still going..i'm still contemplating..i dun want to spend lots of money to be miserable.we brought umam and ruzi to almajlis and suddenly i felt like i was outside a club.it was so crowded.Ishaaq lost weight and i must admit he looked so yummy.Ibraheem on the other hand, put on weight.come to think of it, almajlis is really making lots of money.oh yeah, han decided to wear his thong that day coz he was wearing a white drawstrings and i thought that was hilarious.Guys in thongs never fail to make me laugh..hehehehe...especially those brightly coloured ones..gosh..hilarious, disgusting?..hehehehe
it was stay home sunday yesterday and i felt good.a little misunderstanding with B and we managed to work things out a little.meeting him later..he wants to do indian today..he misses his rose milk from komalas big time.
