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Talking About Guns


I go over to visit my best friend from high school. He's got a nine month old baby boy now, and it's his first full day watching the kid. Fortunately, his dad, a retired army general, is there to help out.

"Hey," I ask, "remember the Great Western Gun show? We used to go there."

"Oh yeah," my friend says, changing a diaper. "My Dad has a table there every year. They're moving it to Nevada."

"That's right, it's illegal to sell guns on LA County property now, isn't it?"

"Hey Dad! Are you still going to the gun show?"

His dad comes into the room. "Yeah, I'm going next time."

"I'd like to go and get one of those t-shirts that say, 'Kill 'Em All and Let God Sort 'Em Out.' Great kitsch factor in that."

His Dad: "It's only on LA county property that it's illegal. They were trying to fight it."

Me: "I became interested in the whole gun issue when working for aid groups in Long Beach."

My friend's Dad eyes me warily. "How so?"

I realize I'd better be polite here. "Oh, just all the changes in policy that are going on. The one thing both sides agree on is that gun tracking is a good thing."

My friend's Dad agrees. "Just so long as they don't turn it into a national registration system. Do you know that they want to register guns and charge people upwards of $80 for that? That's what happened in Australia."

"Mmm, I was there when that whole Martin Bryant thing happened. What amazed me was how quickly they got rid of the automatic weapons. And it was the right wing party that started the program." I think it's pretty cool of course. But he's quietly appalled.

My friend "Aren't all the guns are registered there? They could round 'em up easily." Which is, of course, a bad thing.

Me. "I think it was just the automatic weapons. You can still own other firearms."

His Dad, warming to the subject: "Yeah, I've been keeping an eye on that situation. You can't even own a pistol there now. They got rid of ALL the guns."

Me: "I don't think they've done that....I'll have to check on that."

"Yeah, you check. You do that. You know, the crime rate has skyrocketed since they got rid of the guns. There was one guy in Australia, his store was held up by an armed robber and he didn't have his gun anymore."

I get the impression someone is getting his facts from a partisan source. But I'm doing the fella a misservice by presenting only this conversation. This is a person who means well. I went on Cub Scout camping trips with him. He'd go out his way to help me out, if I needed it. But like many people I know, he's very opinionated on this one issue.

We decide to go for a walk with the baby in a stroller. My friend's dad sees us to the door. "You know, if they outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns," he says in a tone like, isn't it obvious? My friend laughs his agreement. I almost riposte "And only outlaws will shoot their children accidentally." But I don't.

I spent half my youth in a community where the major source of employment was aerospace megacompanies. Lockheed, TRW, Martin Marietta, Boeing, McDonnell Douglas, Northrup - all common names. Everyone's Dad was an engineer. Everyone voted Republican and had perfectly manicured lawns. It was safe and stable, though mind-numbingly dull.

So while I'm not a conservative, in my past I've got a lot of people who are. And it's nice to see them from time to time, though I'd go nuts living like this on a regular basis.

It's really something to chew over. . It's weird how friendly we can be on one level, while being so different politically. In the abstract, their views are kind of scary. And I'll bet mine are to them too.
We walk up to the park. My friend talks about the one gun he has, how he might buy another. I mention about how the rest of the world thinks we're nuts, for our country's gun policies. He chuckles at that. The baby is starting to nod off.

I'd like to try firing a gun myself, I mention - to demystify it, so I could write about weapons in a story without relying on Hollywood impressions. "They've got those Foley sound guys making bass rumbles in action flicks - every time I've heard a gun go off in real life, it's like 'pop'."

"Hey, why don't you go to the shooting range with my Dad?" my friend suggests. "They've got all kinds of guns you can rent there."

"Nah," I say. "I can do it cheaper in Southeast Asia. You know what's weird, that I noticed? Shooting ranges are listed on maps here." Like you really need to find one in a hurry?

My friend: "I went to the range with my Dad to learn how to shoot, after the LA riots. He was actually at the gun show when the riots began. They wouldn't let people out of the fairgrounds. He called up and said, 'Get out the guns and load them'."

"Man, I'd love to see what would happen if I set off a firecracker at that gun show," I say. We both laugh. "So did you get out the arsenal?"

"I tried to load a pistol but I used the wrong size bullet. My hands were shaking. It slipped right through and fell on the ground.
I just wanted to know how to use a gun, after that."

"Hmm."

"I've got one gun upstairs in my old room...I'm thinking of selling it." The baby is almost asleep now.

"That might be a good idea."