|
find yourself out there.
The Moment-++ yan zˇ
Friday, December 12, 2003 07:21 p.m.
i'll miss the damn lot of u.
it feels so weird this year.
ever since i heard the news, i've been sitting around and thinking for a long time: am i just an important entity in others lives, or do i just suck off a seemingly wasted existance?
now while i type at this screen, i wonder : have i ever made a difference in someone's life? this......despondence i feel, i can't explain it. all i feel is a sense of melancholy and i can't even explain why.
i guess it's all part of life.people come and go.and we move on.we forget about them. but what makes people do that?why do we forget about others whom we've shared countless hours of hope,joy and laughter?the contact we've lost, we can't get it back.
i don't understand.i just feel the need to post this.and i really think that i have got to cherish all my friends.before they all start disappearing.
people, if u do read this, just remember that you DO form an important part of my life and u mean the world to me.
i just hope it applies for me too.
Thursday, August 28, 2003 11:02 p.m.
mars.....choc and planet.....
hey!on wed i went with xiumin to junying's house.....it was such a fun experience becuase we were going to serangoon which was relatively unkown becuase i had never been to that area before and i was really excited abt going to see Marz......so xiumin and i took 158 all the way to serangoon[god.] and on the way we were niao-ed by ah jie who SUSPECTED SOMETHING[die]......haha....but it was quite funny......anyways after we got down xiumin saw a MAC sign and ran after it.....bought a large fries withe xtra sodium.......then she bought MSG CHICKEN biscuits....i bought mars bars and a pet bot of lemon tea....[i swear, tt gurl will die of sodium overdoes someday].....and we took 315 to junying's home.....we took almost 1 hr to buy stuff....so by the time we got there it was abt 5.....kinda late but haha....anyway junying invited us in.....and i was quite astounded by his home.....hah....we watched his PW video and his computer and chap 5[ go read chap 4]......and then xiumin went to do an emode test....we found out she was driven by peace[ anyway i think this is quite true bcus i always thot xiumin loves peace]....haha....it was abt 6 and amazingly his sis LURVES sbsp[spongebob sqpants] like me....and we tuned in....junying and xiumin went to look @ the chickens[which reminds me!i nv got a look @ em!]....i watched spongebob and laughed and laughed and laughed....the sho was always SO cynical....mr krabs turned GREEN......haha...and sb had his butt smashed into a million pieces......after tt we waited till lionel and oy came[watched a little holland V meanwhile] then we went to eat.....i had fish porrridge while the rest had noodles.....then they shared satay........[didi mention?xiumin nv ate mars b4, and when i gave her 1,she was hooked and had 4].....so much food....and so late...by the time we went back it was bt 8.30....i was worrying bt getting home on time......and we went back and caliberated his telescope....but all we got was a neon orange light....not bad actuallly....and i had to leave.....oh well.....
i reallly wanna thank junying for invitng me to his home cus after all it got me the opportunity to explore the area and also get a closer look at mars......i also reallly appreciate his[lionel and oy too] to fill my brain with knowledge[holds oni for jy] and nonsense for [oy and lionel]....haha....it was so fun.........
Thursday, August 28, 2003 10:51 p.m.
c.balL
hey....back.......from a really long rest....there has been so much stuff going on that i nv had time to use the computer and tyoe something long like today ahha anyway here;s how my day went.......i was feeling rather depressed at about 2 pm as everyone had like gone home and i had the sickening realisation that i could be the only one cheering...which of course links back to the PROBLEM in 3K which i shall not elaborate[btw i decided to give up] anyway so i went down and the match was almost starting at about 2.55.......i called kristin and jayne to get their butts down asap......and the match against 3I started......we were like so tense beacuse 3I had so many people there supporting them while 3K had a pitiful number of people!anyways we continued supporting and siangee came down from his hostel...haha.....but something bad happened when minghui injured her ankle bcus of some b**** in 3I....oh well....anyway we had so many injured people i was reallly scared.........but in the end we still fought back and we won!so happy.......next was 3E.let's just describe the match as piece o' cake.3E seemed to have no interest in playing wadsoeva and we practically walked over them.......the score was kinda high......then there was a long wait for our next one against 3H....meanwhile yh came and looked for me.....told me he damn sian....so i walked ard with him for a while[frankly i think he was jux bored and cld not find any 3J ppl] and we walked and walked and walked ard.........i was pretty amazed 3C thrashed 3F 60-7.....which is like my god......and 3L played like fiery godnesses!gonna kill them when it comes to our turn~_~and alvin was yakking bt how his class needed new score boards cus the score was TOO HIGH...yeah yeah wadeva......anyway while we waited there was this exciting match of 3H/I......cute but i guess too much fighting........ppl take this game to seriously....
anyways,here's thanks to everyone who turned up to sppt!
Zhi Han Kor Kor
Lu Ting Jie Jie
kristin
tee yan
yi han
kaisheng
siang ee Ah Bu
tee yan
and all others!
GO 3K!
Tuesday, August 19, 2003 08:34 p.m.
WOW.::.
hey!finally had the time to use the com today.....Woo......oh well...haha////anyway had two tests today....chem was....wEIRD....while jap was juz frightful....haha.....anyways i think i must be going crazy....save me someone?
aRe u hApPy noW?
Thursday, August 14, 2003 09:42 p.m.
yawn
hw long has it been.....15 days????????god....
Wednesday, July 30, 2003 08:14 p.m.
SaD.::.
m y god it's thurs night and i am sitting here in the living room typing away on an ancient laptop of my sister's. the week seems like it is over but i don't feel like it is so... and my bio and phy tests today were total flops sigh.....wad's a septum?......how do i calculate c without any value???WHYWHYWHYWHWYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHYWHY!!!
but sigh....at leat they r over.....i spent last week crying over eds and bronz...uess what...dance got bronze too...so i guess tt evens out the entire team and equal achievement thingy.............
but some good news...my math is finally improving.......my trigo test was not TT bad....haha.......but tt's it.no oher good news.or maybe i don;t trt much stuff as good anymore.my expectations may be getting higher haha.......
after seven months of struggle and wondering if 3K is a goodclass at all.......i still fail to see why others don;t see the internal collapse within our class.why?or mayb i'm just too over-sensitive......but i guess tt's juz part and parcel of life.u get wad u hav and u live with it.....oh....well.....only 5 mths to go......then i can relax and let things take their course....
RECOMMENDED SONG LIST:
MICHELLE BRANCHE - YOU SET ME FREE
SUN YANZI - Wo Bu Nan Guo
VANESSA CARLTON - TWILIGHT
SHUNZA - WEN ZI JI
spent about 3 hours yesterday night listening to wo bu nan guo along.... haha.....spent recess singing the song again and again ...haha...people must think i am mad. but music is my only escape from the world of 3K and Dunman High.........in fact, listening to music is one of my only enjoyments now....so please don't stop me....
good luck to everyone.....
Friday, July 25, 2003 09:23 p.m.
you set mE fRee.::.
Can't you see?
There's a feeling
That's come over me
Close my eyes
You're the only one
That leaves me
Completely breathless
No need to wonder why
Sometimes a gift like this
You can't deny
'Cause I wanted to fly,
So you gave me your wings
And time held its breath
So I could see, yeah
And you set me free
There's a will
There's a way
Sometimes words
Just can't explain
This is real
I'm afraid
I guess this time
There's just
No hiding, fighting
You make me restless
You're in my heart
The only light that shines
there in the dark
'Cause I wanted to fly
So you gave me your wings
And time held its breath
So I could see, yeah
And you set me free
When I was alone
You came around
When I was down
You pulled me through
And there's nothing that
I wouldn't do for you
'Cause I wanted to fly
So you gave me your wings
And time held its breath
So I could see, yeah
And you set me free
Friday, July 25, 2003 06:06 p.m.
depression.::.
my god.
just got news tt we got a bronze.
i feel so depressed. god. god. god.
Saturday, July 19, 2003 11:35 a.m.
siAnz....::.
here i am early st morning, blogging.
there must be more to life.
but meanwhile, i am sitting here and deciding on songs to burn.and talking to siangee.hmm.weird stuff to be doing at 11.30....
rained so heavily this morning.i wonder what happened.
encapsulation.
the news reported that some 13-yr-old guy from RI was leaving for the US for FULL-TIME tennis......lOL.who cares?
or maybe it seems significant cus he could lift himself out of the drugery of sg's educaion system.
heck. he must be rich.
Saturday, July 19, 2003 11:33 a.m.
syf.::.
syf was such a lousy competition...but we worked so ahrd for and cumulated into this huge competition.i guess adrenaline really gets us going.
but stufpid cedar gurls came late.so we were shifted forward........so digusting i would say.but who were we to offend the judges?sigh~.....
to make it worse, the sec 2s we "hired" to move props CRASHEd into their lights.....making em pissed...now they want to cut our pts...sigh~.....
petty judges!i question the integrity of this competition!
Wednesday, July 16, 2003 08:07 p.m.
whoa!havent blogged in WEEKS!been VERy busy with syf....be back soon tomolo!
Sunday, July 6, 2003 11:38 p.m.
slowing down.::.
pissed.
decided there are too many factors and people slowing down my pace of life.
need more.
Friday, July 3, 2003 11:26 p.m.
u ^&%^%& blasted bunch.::.
did u sae ice-cream? well i didn't go after all after aimlessly waiting around for an hour and longer....wanna know more?here goes.
firstly, 1.40 pm. I descend upon the canteen, see yh,fa and char eating.ask them how long they would take.had a firm promise of 10 min. went to the foyer. met aud. said hi.
1.55pm. Start getting impatient and goes back to canteen to observe. realise everyone is missing. goes back to foyer feeling "bah" and sees audrey going to canteen.
2.15pm. audrey comes back.see oonyong.engages in conversation meanwhile.watched np sec 1/2 gather for some course. meanwhile a flurry of people come along and tell me.
" oh, we're going."
" oh, we're not going."
" hey, why don't you leave first and we'll catch up later?"
" hey, could u wait somemore?"
2.25pm. audrey looks totally disgusted. felt like i woke up from the wrong side of bed. fa comes along and tells her location change. i feel pissed and sae nothing. audrey snaps and leaves. continue talking to oony.
2.35pm. fa comes along and tells me the trip is off.i feel damn pissed but walk with him to bus stop.
2.45pm. call yh and char. both agree to come immediately.another ound of waiting and akwardness @ bus stop.
3.00pm. people arrive. feeling so pissed i shake my head vigorously and don't say a word.yh says i always change my mind.people leave.i wait slowly for the 12 to arrive.
total waiting time: 1.30 hours. lessons learnt: anger is a good thing.especially when people just don't keep promises.and when people give u reasons that you should not be showing emotions that everyone does not want to see, or the "fact" that they still needed time for activities, basically get angry. no point letting people dupe you of 2 hours of your life and expecting you to be damn happy about it. die people.::.
Thursday, July 3, 2003 09:27 p.m.
.::. so . Long .::.
heyloZ!been a really long while since i've blogged. But considering i''m busy with so many things....haha..yet i have nothing to report here.guess it takes me more time to do many things in a certain time as compared to others.
it's kinda quirky weather now.threatening to rain, yet not raining.thunder is bellowing, yet the raindrops don't fall. the lightning flashes, yet the air is still as humid as ever... ... ...
but well, i guess it's not that bad after all... ...
gonna have ice-cream tomorrow!
Wednesday, June 25, 2003 08:03 p.m.
.>>
SPIRIT is your chinese symbol!
What Chinese Symbol Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Wednesday, June 25, 2003 08:02 p.m.
...
You are Mr. Krabs.You tend to be a be a bit snotty
and definately selfish when it comes to money.
Maybe you should open up a but and SHARE!
Which SpongeBob Squarepants character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Sunday, June 22, 2003 10:20 p.m.
1 week more.::.
Hey people! Today we herald the official end of the second week of the June Holidays.....as they say, time passes so quickly.....*sigh* where has all the time gone to? Though i admit to slacking in the first week....but don;t we all deserve a break sometime?
Ok.So here's my homework list left.
MATH[get down to doing it someday]
BIO Project[my members are gone somewhere.Benjamins in Thailand, Tee Yan's kinda busy, and Zhi Qiang doesn't seem like he cares]
yeah.that's about it.But hey. I'm no math expert. So i'll have to spend lots more time on that. And my bio?well....i do want to do better next semester don't I?:)
Anyways, in case you are wondering, there's nothing to report about my life today except an endless struggle with math,math and more math. Much as i hate math, i'll have to agree that physics and chemistry are gonna need a load of math skills.
Chen yan asked me a couple of days ago:" what is your motivation to study?"I must say, that's gonna take a long time to think. Lemme see....
sec 1... ... to beat edwin.yeah=D
sec 2... ... to beat audrey.yeah˛=D
sec 3... ... ?????????????????????
exactly why i need some new direction in life.
anyway, New semester resolutions! should be easy and simple for me, after all i don't have many interests. A novel + music and enough for me. All other activities irk me. So you could say i have all the time in the world to study. Well, i DO spend ALL of that time studying... ... but what many people don't know is that i don;t really do it THAT willingly you know... ... but i've come to accept it as a part of life in Singapore. Besides, what say you about having dreams in singapore? Only to have them completely shattered? Hah.....let's concentrate i say...
New Semester Resolutions
To get better grades for ENglisH
to get better grades for HcL
to get better grades for MatH
to get better grades for SS/G
to get better grades for jap
to make 3K a better class![though i doubt so, but you won;t know till you try]
to be less anti-social
to shun less people
to reduce screaming volumes
to abuse my authority less
to torture my class comm more
to get a nicer form teacher
to save enough to get a T610
to buy my friends nice prezzies for their b-daes
to read more japanese books
etc...etc...etc.....
seems like a lot for someone like me, but i daresay i'll finish most of them!Good Luck to me=D.::.
Saturday, June 21, 2003 10:13 p.m.
how would you kill someone?
You would make them suffer
How would you kill someone
brought to you by Quizilla
Saturday, June 21, 2003 10:08 p.m.
what Personality are u?
Geek
What's Your Personality Type?
brought to you by Quizilla
Saturday, June 21, 2003 10:02 p.m.
what Personality Disorder are u?
schizoid
Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla
Saturday, June 21, 2003 09:57 p.m.
What Colour are you?
Neutral:
Harmony and balance is key. You don't look at the
world in a negative or positive way and you'll
never judge or assume a situation- you just
look at the facts. People like you are peaceful
and accepting.
Made by
Sara
What color do you see the world in?
brought to you by Quizilla
Saturday, June 21, 2003 09:50 p.m.
What Finding Nemo fish are u?
What Finding Nemo Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Friday, June 20, 2003 08:14 p.m.
Deng.Ni.Hui.Lai
等你回来
词:戴佩妮 曲:戴佩妮
街灯一盏盏的暗 摇开车窗等待天亮
空气有你的发香 是一种奢侈的幻想
我一个人坐在车厢 听着cd
数着烟蒂 夜究竟它有多长 你若不在 夜很漫长
我看着街上的人来来往往经过我的车窗
却没有谁的眼神可以代替安抚我的悲伤
只有等你回来 等你温柔肩膀
等着你回来捕捉美好时光
寂寞并不是因为没有人陪 缺乏安慰
而是有一种空虚感它一直在那里作祟
那到底要忙得多累才能让我安全入睡
等待是什么样的滋味
你不是我 你不能体会
|