|
2.47pm :: Sat, 27 Sept 03
np: SPiTZ - aoi kuruma / mOOd: desperate
It's a foggy day in LA today.
After another night of sleeping strange, broken hours, I've come to realize that people are different when they're living at home. Granted, when you go home to family, you don't have to pretend to be "nice" to the people you've grown up with. And when people leave UCLA, stop apartment life and go back to their real homes and start hanging out with their friends from home, their personalities have to revert back to home life. Ever notice how in Fall, after everyone's come back to school, it takes awhile to get reacquainted again? There's the initial stage of euphoria on the first day of school, just dizzy with happiness that everyone's back... But after that it's just slightly awkward, because everyone's been used to their parents or siblings or friends-from-home or study-abroad-peers or fellow interns or co-workers or whatevers for three months. And after those three months you have to work to get used to how life is at UCLA, sometimes extending courtesies, other times just leaving things as they are because both of you have to adapt at the same time. Sometimes it works well, because there's no added pretentions "Hi, how are you, how have you been, etc." and no false hopes that the other person really does want to go out and do something. The jokes are crude and hilarious; the laughter is real, followed by stomach pains and tears from laughing so hard. But sometimes, when you're living alone at UCLA, all you want to hear is a little courtesy on the other end of the line. You want to pick up the phone and say "hey..." for no reason at all, just like the way things were, even though the two (or three or four or whole group) of you are living in entirely different social situations. I know it's difficult, especially when you're on the opposite end, having just having moved back home. I didn't want to do anything but go to the beach when I went home. You just want to veg all day in front of the computer or laze around at the beach or sit in front of the TV doing nothing...because even though it IS possible to do these things in LA, no one does. There's school and work and friends to see, places to go, things to do, stuff to buy... And sometimes you end up on the other side of things, left in LA, not expecting anything or anyone to react they way you'd like them to, but just not quite sure where you stand. Like at the end of the day, fter crazily getting reacquainted with old friends and meeting hordes of freshmen at school, wondering if you should IM her or call him...what would they say?...what would you say. Which relationships do you sever, and which do you keep?
To anyone who's read this far, I apologize. Being alone is bad for me. Don't bother responding to this entry... I'm off to salvage the food in the microwave.
4.25am :: Thurs, 25 Sept 03
np: Knick Knack moozik / mOOd: raaar!
I'm still up! I have a couple of options:
1) Stay up proofreading work or blogging or listening to music or playing GBA SP till I get tired or till I can get a two hour nap in, whichever comes first;
2) Go to bed;
3) Take a shower and spend two hours sitting around pretending to "wait for my hair to dry" while I surf Xanga;
4) Debate about what to do (:
hmmmm.
12.25am :: Mon, 15 Sep 03
np: ELT - jump / mOOd:
Oddly enough, after surfing a bunch of friends' Xangas/LJs/blogs, the topic of vanity seems to have come up a bunch of times. Self-perception. It's all about what you think of yourself...what you think you look like, what you want to look like, what you think others think you look like... And that was exactly what I was thinking about today, about how everyone has their stubborn flaws that they're not willing to give up, no matter how harmful they acknowledge their behavior to be. It's like, if I had to pick a single vice, mine would definitely be greed.
*grins* Guess what I just bought myself?! (;
...a pearl blue GameBoy SP baby! :D
And the game Mother 1+2 (aka Earthbound)..any suggestions for the collection? (:
11.22am :: Fri, 12 Sep 03
np: cricket cricket / mOOd: bloop
Yet another dream... I was witness to all these weird scenes, almost Ring-like, a man impaled on a large, wrought iron spike, dragged up and down curving elevator shafts...mangled people screaming, blood flowing from their mouths, old monsters thudding down the hall...and then somehow we ended up shopping, with some girls I didn't know and Ange and Y.Lee, looking around in a store I didn't recognize...and then riding a motorcycle across town, crashing up a bus ramp and finding ourselves stranded in the middle of a hockey game...and then me in a Japanese schoolgirl's uniform, rollerblading through the toy section of Jusco and being told to get out...
I think I've been eating too many hallucinogenic tuna sandwiches... Yeah.
4.19am Oki time :: Sat, 6 Sep 03
np: Sowelu - breath / mOOd: cold
Ookay. Just so that disturbing dream entry (scroll down to read it (: ) won't be the top thing on the list, I'll add some happy, cheery survey stuff. Stolen from Torie:
HAVE YOU EVER..
- Been to New York?: Nope, just DC...but my dad worked there as a waiter for awhile
- Been to Florida?: Nope
- California?: ka ri foru nia?
- Hawaii?: I wanna gooooo..spring break?!?
- Mexico?: Nope
- China?: Just HK, but before 1997, and Taiwan, which technically isn't part of the PROC...so no (:
- Canada?: Nope
- Dreamed something really crazy and then it happened the next day?: Oh yeah, I get deja vu a lot, for some reason.
Usually I'll dream about mundane things like drawing on my notebook in class or people ordering specific dishes at restaurants...and presto, it'll come true! :D
- Wish you were the opposite sex: haha, all the time. sometimes I think I act more like a guy than...than ionno. metrosexuals? hehe. but i'm glad i'm a girl ;)
- Red or blue?: yellow? :D
- Spring or fall: spring for the nice warm weather, cherry blossoms, and easter candy...fall for crisp autumn breezes and cinnamon pumpkin *drool*
- Math or English?: Hmm. I like doing math probles waaay better than I writing English essays (ironic huh?) but I suck at Math. My dad had to walk me through AP Calc, heh.
- What was the last food you ate?: Taco rice and melon soda!Num num num. *chews pillow*
- How many buddies are online?: 30/152 on AiM (it's like noonish in LA), 7/49 on MSN, 3 outta a gazillion on ICQ
WHAT WAS THE..
- Last movie you saw?: Totoro :D
- Last noise you heard?: Sowelu's album
- Last time you went out of the state?: hehe... five-six days ago? I'm still outta the state.
- Thing u look for in a guy/girl?: hair?
- What is the first thing you think when you wake in the morning?: Hungry... *eats comforter*
- Chocolate or vanilla?: MiNT CHOCOLATE CHiP!!
- If you could have any job you wanted, what would it be?: fashion designer/retailer (TENiN!...why did I go to college? haha)
- Do You Have A Job?: Kinda sorta. I proofread proposals for this company that turns manga into screenplays
- Do You Like Being Around People?: of course (: but everyone needs their alone time...
- Are you a lefty, righty or ambidextrous?: ha, righty...but I dial phone #s, putt at mini golf, and balance with my left hand (:
- What's under your bed?: makuro kurosuke!...uhh dust bunnies
YOU HAVE...
- Hair Color: brownish blond
- Eye Color: brown
- Height Currently: 5'4", with shoes (;
- Current Age: 19
- Siblings: Nope
- Location: Oki/LA
- College Plans: English/Japanese major, trying to figure out how I can squeeze in a Cog Sci major (stOOpid psych has no minor P:)
- Any Piercings: No...not yet. (; I'm trying to figure out how I can get my ears done (two in each ear and a cartilage piercing), a nose stud, maybe one in the lip or the tongue...haha I'm greedy (;
- Hobbies: shopping for clothes and makeup. playing puzzle bobble, spending time online, going to the arcades, eating! (:
- What Type Automobile Do You Drive?: 95 EXiV, yeah yeah, no one knows what this is..hehe. It's a 4-door family sedan, but looks a lil cooler --> (:
FAVORITE...
- Magazine?: MAXiM!! *schlurp!* InStyle, Cosmo (cuz it's trashy! haha), egg, Popteen. anything to do with games (PS2, GC, GBA...my newest investments hehehe) or laptops. I kept myself amused for 10 hours on the plane with two PC magazines, one about laptops, one about Mac, and an EGM...and I didn't even get to the 500page Vogue ;)
- Room In house: the living room!
- Type of music: R&B, Britrock
- Memory: days at the beach...(: and good food!
- Day Of The Week: Friday, hands down.
- Perfume Or Cologne: Gucci "Envy", "Poison", Clinique "happy", Elizabeth Arden "Sunflowers"
- Flower: bougenvillas, forget-me-nots, sunflowers! :D
Phew. That took me only an hour (:
3.25am :: Sat, 6 Sep 03
np: Sowelu - my dear / mOOd: raving insomiac
Summer nights, apart from the wide range of things to go do, go see, shop for, and otherwise plunder, suck because they're cold. And yet hot. and humid. And sticky.
And so I'm up, at 3.25am...which, in LA, wouldn't be so weird of a thing, chillin in my room listening to music and mulling around online... But this is home. I usually fall asleep around 10:30pm and wake up at 8am. And not due to construction, either. *shakes head* It was really hot in my room, so I got up and washed my face and all of a sudden the temperature dropped to minus freezing. Aaand my mom wants me to wake up at the "buttcrack of dawn" (who uses that, anyway?) and take her somewhere to do something. Oh, and then there's some kind of sale at 10am. So the "buttcrack of dawn" must fall somewhere between 5-7am. Oh why oh why am I still up then?
I had another one of those disturbing dreams just now...well, started to, anyway. Before drifting off into unconsciousness around 11 I heard a knocking on my window, which is thorougly creepy cos it's entirely possible. No climbing on a 3-story tree to get down or anything, I'm on the ground floor in a separate 'wing' (hehe our house isn't big enough to have 'wings') of the house, surrounded by a snake den and some strategically placed boonies. Military planning, psh. Anyway, so I was having a normal enough dream till I pulled some DVD case off a shelf, and it was one of those weird images you can't get out of your mind, like that awful 30-foot poster of Thirteen Ghosts they had up at Sawtelle back in October 2001... I think it was the same black background with a sort of rusty-orange flesh-colored lettering "GaMeWoRkS". No disturbing pictures, no special CD, no holographic detailing to make it look like something jumped out at you. Just that one word, in rusty dirty letters on a black background, was enough to make me wake up in shock. And I hit the lace curtain over my bed, to make it even scarier. So I woke up in the dark, wondering why my closet door was open and if there were monsters in the hallway or ghosts in the mirror, and stumble into the bathroom. And we all know how scary dark bathrooms can be. Well, kind of. Anyway, so I'm in there washing my face and hoping that another person won't be staring back at me in the mirror, when the door opens. Thankfully, it's just my dad, but it freaked me out nonetheless. And because I'm typing with my back to the rest of the room, I'm still freaked out. Oh, what is wrong with me?
As if that weren't enough, I didn't get a break from having weird dreams last night, either. Last night I was being chased by some armada of weird soldiers (beheaded knights, disjointed puppets, badly burned half-skeletons, mangled bodies ala Silent Hill) and the bitchy ass staff of Kadena.. While I struggled to hide behind corners and lockers and doors, some freakishly old angry woman who looked like Connelly was trying to corner me. I think at one point we sat down and argued about something, and I ended up walking out because she was being such a bitch. Halfway through my theatrics I realized I'd left my bag there, and as I walk back to where she was, she appears in the outside corridor with my bag. When she saw me, she threw it against the wall and it landed on a nearby table. As I ran outside to hide from the army, I spot a crazy Conan the Barbarian guy with a spiked club walking around, so I hide on the roof with (of all things) a plastic bag filled with metal stuff that not only goes rustle but also clink clank. He thunders up the stairs as I go back down them, and finally he mentions something about getting out of the city. I find a motorcycle and Connelly-woman opens the school doors to let me inside, introducing me to "the new principal" who is, of course, someone who looks like Freddy in a suit. Pleasant. So I run the bike through the halls, the walls and lockers now bursting with creepy ghosts and the like, and start the engine, roaring through another set of doors. By this time, the sun is setting and I'm gaining good speed...but as I look down I find that my legs are too short to effectively balance the bike, should I need to stop. It was like a dramatic episode ending. Blah! I say...blah!
9.55pm Oki time :: Thurs, 4 Sep 03
np: Sowelu - shine / mOOd: hello weekdays
Hi friends!!
I think this'll be one of those random blogs. So far I've only been to three game stores, two Juscos, and a handful of restaurants. Oh, and KFC. *schlurp!* And if you know me, that's not that much (: Especially considering I've been back for nearly a week! I did manage to do a little shopping, buying omiyage and some clothes... But it's funny. This time nothing much has changed. Like stuff's just kind of...stagnant. Stores aren't going out of business, but they're not really getting any new merchandise to display either. And considering this past time was the longest I'd been away from home (about five months), that's pretty remarkable. I wonder what happened.
Then again, I haven't been downtown yet :D
Corn potage soup is the best!! *drools* Along with apple tea, milk tea, random-flavored FANTA, cheese-filled sausages, taco rice, tuna/egg sandwiches, and sweet pancakes. And clothes shopping.
There's nothing like putting on your favorite sweater all warm and cozy-like.
Well, it's nearing my bedtime... Does anyone else go to bed at normal times when they're at home? hehe. I think going to bed early does something - last night I had this weird dream that my parents were getting divorced and that there was nothing I could to stop it, so I woke up in tears, real, wet tears turning me into a blubbering misty-eyed mess...then Daich called (somehow I had missed an earlier voicemail from someone) and something about Horror, with the image of a RiNG (I kid you not)... and then Chet was there, and I was lolling around in my chair listening, listening...and all of a suddent I realized I had fallen asleep while he'd been talking (like I always do during movies)...and while I apologized he excused himself and left - meanwhile Terry and Mina had turned the apartment into a swimming pool, with all the furniture floating about like a bad Fantasia remake... so I swam beside a king-size bed (how that got through the door I do not know) and swept away the stuff clogging the drain...and through the waves some weird green translucent ghosty hands reached up to grab me...I woke up after swimming a couple of laps. I think I've been playing too many "horror-action" games. *shakes head* Bah. Well, nite all! zzz ___m(-o-)m___
10.40am :: Tues, 2 Sep 03
np: Sowelu - CC / mOOd: like updating
Hi friends!!
Now that you all have been bombarded with those pictures, i should prolly feed you guys with something more substantial huh? (:
Well, Oki's the same. I haven't done too much since I've been home, except make the usual supermarket runs. I bought Spirited Away for 2000yen, and rented a bunch of new CDs (Chemistry, Sowelu, ELT), just to catch up on J-Pop again. I've gone out to eat with my parents every day for lunch, and when we come home I make them dinner. They follow me while I go grocery shopping, just so they can get out of the house... It's a really different pace than it is in LA. I guess I'll just have to learn to be more patient (: (and anyone who knows me KNOWS patience is not one of my virtues ;) heheh) I play the vampire game and pass the time while driving my parents around by looking at all the cars that go by. I did see Taka though, who came by to visit Sunday afternoon. We went to Tsutaya and this "kawaii burger stand" out by the man-made beach near the Hamby flea market. Had a C.O.L.T burger (chili, onion, lettuce, tomato? pshh, it tasted more like tacos) for dinner and custard-filled churros (Banana! hahaha ;) ) for dessert. Ooh, and I got to try Sumomo (plum) FANTA. sooooo yummy. *shrugs* It's been an uneventful couple of days...relaxing, borderline uneventful. DAN!! hurry up and come home so we can go plaaaaaay (: I need more UFO Catcher dolls (; and to the rest of you - Matt, ChetChad, Ayumi, whoever else is on island - I'm HOME! Let's go to the beach!!
12.05pm Oki time :: Sun, 31 Aug 03
np: washer/dryer ambience / mOOd: huuungry
Yummm...so being home lends itself to eating, especially lots and lots of tropical fruits, like this giant apple and "king" mango my parents bought for me (note toothpick thrown in to indicate scale). Hehehe.
11.14pm :: Sat, 30 Aug 03
np: TV moozik / mOOd: yayee
So while I still have access to CuteFTP and the BOL account on the big computer (desktops are so much more stable than laptops), here's some more pics:
August 17th, @ Sushi Mac: Derek gets 2nd place by eating 27 plates of sushi...mmm
Later that day @ Monterey Park: Torie and I recreate the Dancing SQUiD from Taiko no Tatsujin
August 25th, Baking Day: Torie + Jen versus The Cupcakes
The finished product!
And then... :D
Note the obligatory jar of RAINBOW CHIP frosting :D
I can SO relate (;
 (creditSiNFeST)
August 11th, BiRTHDaY! :D
A good, yummy dinner... (note my full martini glass and Conroy eating)
...with us girls... (note mostly full martini glass)
...with the guys... (notice Conroy is still eating)
...with Fancy and Grant...
...with Grant and Conroy... (ooo seXXXay)
...with my Godiva Chocolate Martini that Terry ordered for me... (note still mostly-full glass)
...with me turning red after downing the Godiva Chocolate Martini... (note empty martini glass)
...with us posing at the beach...
...and with us doing it aaall in style.
9.03pm Oki time :: Sat, 30 Aug 03
np: MIB II playin in the background / mOOd: full
Ahhhh. I made it back to Kansai, content in my findings at the Lawson (got myself some chocolate Puccas and an apple blended drink) and the bookstore (biker chick Ayu in a magazine), happy at the Lotteria with the cheap 100yen milkshakes and little Rody happy meals, and amused by walking around the Lego and IKEAesque stores at the Rinku Town outlet mall (nearly considered bypassing them to find out what lay beyond the Rinku Town station on the Nankai, hehehe)...and then I came back to Oki. And it wasn't the considerable change of pace (they do, after all, drive 50 kilometers = 30 miles on the highways) or humidity (ughhh...sticky...) that hit me nearly as hard as the state of affairs in my house. I considered NOT putting up photos or describing how things have changed in my house, but it's things like the neuroses of family life that amuse us all. I know I was thoroughly amused...and, well, I'll let the pictures speak for themselves:
In the kitchen, there are
Not to mention a ton of bottles and medicines
My dad made sixty (yes, SIXTY) spare keys, which he promptly put on display by NAILING them to the wall
Also a four-foot Hello Kitty in the living room (this makes the Hello Kitty just slightly shorter than I am)
While my mom picked up knitting again
she also had the time to find herself a new love: Playing Super Puzzle Bobble 2 (PS2)
...for three hours
Ohhhh yeah. I love my parents (:
|
|
|
|
|
