I am feeling: The weather is:
Passions Correspondence Say hi to Yesterday Riiiiiing!
USMC
God
The Creek
Silver screen
Piracy
MyMobile
DAF
Survive THIS
Frisco
Amtrak
Speak your mind
Talk to me
Olei
Luxor
Jarhead
Oct 00//Pass go
Dec 00//Born to shimmer
Jan 01//Auld Lang Syne
March 01//Surviving JH
Apr 01//Frisco
May 01//Ooo-Rah
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Here is the question for the day. Why is it that every time you're in a hurry, EVERY light seems to be RED? Ponder that for a while.
I talked to this guy the other nite who actually went to my high school. How cool is this? He was in my graduating class in FL and now he's a Recon Marine here in CA. Coincidences are cool. Anyway, we're gonna' go out tomorrow. I have no idea what we're gonna' do, but we'll get along. And even if we don't, we'll have a lot to talk about anyway. Sometimes, boys are cool. SOMETIMES.
I have to go to my recruiter's office tomorrow morning to get a body-fat test done. Sometimes being a fat kid is not cool. Again, sometimes. If my body fat is under 26% (which I know it is), he can get me a waiver for the 8 pounds of excess fat that I have. I definitely lost 6 pounds in a week... so Jeff (my recruiter) is pushing for me to enlist sooner. Jeff's rad. I could totally be a recruiter. Their whole job is based on talking up the Marine Corps. I am so good at that.
I was just gonna' write a big paragraph about JH, but he's not worth the space in my 'blog anymore. So, I'm outtie 5000 for now. Peace.
I like Train. They're neat. Sara will probably comment about me stealing that song, but I don't care.. :P I'm actually updating 2 days in a row. See, I told you all that miracles do exist.
So, me recruiter called me yesterday and told me that he contacted my "ex" husband. He said that he'll be down here on Friday at 1600 to sign the papers he needs to sign regarding my enlisting in the Marine Corps. How strange. He said I didn't have to be there, but that I could come down if I wanted to. I probably won't. I'm just a baby like that. Jeff said that Steve wanted me to call him. I called his cel phone last nite, and I didn't realize until I hung up how much I was hoping that he WOULDN'T answer. He didn't end up answering and I left a message with my home phone number. Now, every time the phone rings, I jump. Again, I'm such a baby.
I found out on Felixurday nite that Larry got married. MARRIED. Isn't that funny. Someone who was completely NOT ready for a relationship is now married. I don't even think it's been a year. I guess I realize now that he must have not wanted a relationship with ME, and he was just looking for an excuse. And I'm okay with that now.. but for the longest time after we stopped seeing eachother, I wasn't. I wasn't okay with the fact that I gave SO much of myself to him, wasted so much of my time caring about him, and worrying about him, and trying to build somewhat of SOMETHING signifigant with him.. and in the end, he pushed me away. Larry is one of the ONLY men who's made me cry. I cried when he wrecked his truck, when he told me it was over, when he gave me back the ticket I bought him to Tim McGraw. I cried when he called me a few months ago and told me he was moving in with his new girlfriend, and now.. a year later, I cried when I found out he got married. And then I got mad at myself for crying over something that's not worth my time or my tears. My "relationship" with Larry taught me a lot of life's little lessons. Some things just have to be learned the hard way to really be understood, I guess.
I'm gonna' go write an entry for Sara.
At 2320 on June 10th, 8 hours before the execution of Timothy McVeigh, my brother was born. A heart that deserved to stop beating did, and a miracle took it's place. I think that creating a life is the most amazing thing that humans (and mammals of all sorts, for that matter) are capable of. The birth of my brother is definitely the most amazing thing I've seen in 21 years.
And I realized a lot of things in the moments following my brother's arrival. I realized that in a fleeting moment, a perfect little person can take his first breath of life. In that same fleeting moment, a heart consumed by evil can stop beating. I realized that life is nothing but a series of fleeting moments.. and that what each person chooses to do in these moments shapes their destiny, creates their memories. I realized that miracles DO exist. My brother is a miracle. My MOM is a miracle, even. Happy Birthday, Sam.
Now, to add my 2 cents about Mr. McVeigh. I believe in the death penalty. I believe that someone capable of doing something SO mind-blowingly horrible does NOT deserve the incredible gift of life. I believe that Timothy McVeigh deserved to die. However, I don't consider his death a reckoning. His crime was not, by ANY means, justified with his death. Today did not bring back any of the victims, did not rebuild the Alfred P. Murrah building, did not ease the intense suffering of any of the mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, and friends. Today did not guarentee that something like this won't happen again. 168 people died when that bomb exploded, 1 person died today. It took 13 and a half hours to remove the last survivng victim from the wreckage. It took 14 DAYS to remove all the bodies. Timothy McVeigh died in 4 minutes. Is this the definition of a reckoning? I, for one, hardly think so.
On that note, I'm gonna' call it a nite. To the miracle of birth and the memory of OKC.
Damn, I am really bad at this posting stuff. It'll probably take me the whole month of June to catch up on everything that's happened since 18 May. Neat.
Spring semester is way over. I actually PASSED my math class. The final was really hard... and on top of THAT, it was only TWELVE questions. But, I passed it.. and now, I have 19.5 completed college credits. I'm taking beginning acting this summer. The class actually starts tomorrow. I'm only taking it b/c I have to. Like, I don't HAVE to take acting, but I need another 1/2 credit in a 100 or above course. My math class was only math 090 (I know, I'm lame) and I need 15 completed credits in 100 or above courses to enlist. Oh well.. acting is only 4 weeks long. It ends on 29 June. It won't be hard. It'll probably be fun.
As for the Marine Corps, it's really gonna' happen. I went and talked to my recruiter face to face for the first time last week. He's a cool guy. We talked for a few hours the first day, and then I went back the next day and he took me to take the ASVAB. I guess the ASVAB is the first step to everything else. Your score determines what jobs you are eligible for. I scored an 89. (99 is the highest.. 50 is passing.) My recruiter was really happy.. :) On the side of bad news, I am (or WAS) 13 pounds over my weight limit. Now, I have 3 weeks to lose it. By God, if it KILLS me, I'm gonna' lose this weight. It's amazing what you can do when you want something THAT bad. I'm taking Xenadrine, eating WAY healthy, and doing 2 to 3 hours of cardio 4 times a week. I've already dropped 4 pounds in a weeek. I feel REALLY good about this. I'M gonna' make this happen.
That is, by far, the biggest thing in my life right now. I still participate religiously in Felixurday nites! A blast, as always. We bbqued on Fiesta Island for Memorial Day. It was fun until the cops came and gave us all tickets for drinking after 2000. EIGHT PM. What the HELL kinda' EARLY time is that!? San Diego is lame sometimes. Mom is ready to have the baby any minute. Kinda' exciting, I guess. He'll be about 3 months old when I leave for Boot Camp. That's kinda' sad. I'm gonna' miss the best part. Oh well.. these are the sacrafices I make.
Dinner is done. BBqued chicken. Yum. After dinner, I think I'll go to the gym again. The gym rocks.
*~"It doesn't matter about the car I drive or the ice around my neck. All that matters is that you recognize that it's just about RESPECT.."~* -N'Sync
14 June 01 1511 hours.
*~"Tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet? Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day.. and head back to the milky way? Tell me, did you sail across the sun? Did you make it to the milky way to see the lights are faded.. and that heaven is overrated? Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star? One without a permenant scar, and did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?"~* -train
12 June 01 1543 hours.
*~"A baby's born in the middle of the nite in a local delivery room. They grab his feet, smack him 'til he cries.. he goes home the next afternoon.."~* -bp
11 June 01 2245 hours.
*~"We drank a toast to innocence. We drank a toast to now. And tried to reach beyond the emptiness, but neither one knew how.."~* -df
03 June 01 1736 hours.