*Hot Spots*

These are handed out with the license.
Oh yeah, like the world needs this. Sometimes I think there should be IQ tests required before you get your Driver's License. Imagine! Think what a dark, elitist, Orwellian world we'd live in then! Okay, maybe that isn't such a good idea, but sometimes I think there are some real moron drivers out there. Wait, I have an alternative; instead, I'll imagine what it would be like if I could summon random bolts of lightning from the sky. Ah...gratuitous violence. Much more satisfying.

Mega!!
It took a little seen MTV music video to get me to discover Powerman 5000, and for that I'm ashamed. I should have listened to them before that. They're a pretty cool band, but even groovier is that I think the lead singer is Rob Zombie's brother or something. I wonder what that's like. I mean, I'm sure he'd piss you off like other siblings do but at the same time he's officially 'cool', and has groupies and stuff. And there's that whole horror/demon motiff which might be a little intimidating. I bet he still gets a noogie every now and then, though.

Don't cross the streams.
So I hear there's going to be a new Ghostbusters flick, and for my money I think its about time. For some insane reason I remember thinking that the original was supposed to be straight horror, and me being a scaredy-cat kid I kept away from it as much as possible. I only denied myself a modern classic, I guess. You'd think the giant Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would have tipped me off, tho'.

Dwaw-ings.
Speaking of bad art, once back in fourth grade I drew a picture for a 'save the environment' type contest at school. My masterpiece involved a small park, complete with kids-doing-fun-stuff and the lemon circle sun in the corner of the page. The idea was to come up with a cool ad. My slogan, plastered in black crayon above my little park was:

'A planet is a terrible thing to waste.'

I won. I vaguely remember being somewhat proud of that. To be honest, I still am. My enviro-plea still has more depth than alot of today's advertising. *cough*-oldnavy-*cough* And I learned light plagarism at such an early age, too!

How would you like this signed?
It seems like its been a long time since I've seen a cool email signature. When I first used the Internet (back when it was a desolate, sound-free, multimedialess wasteland) people were using cool sigs left and right, stuff that made you think, laugh, cry, shoot milk out your nose, etc. Now nodody really gives a damn, I guess. We seem to have lost our creative edge. I obviously haven't, though, because how else could I have used the word 'multimedialess'??

Who are you?
So there's a story that when my great grandfather came to the country he had the idea to 'americanize' his last name, and therefore changed it to what I and my family live with today. A true story, supposedly, which brings up two important points: 1) I am, in fact, something of a non-entity in a genealogy sense and 2) somewhere there could possibly be a hell of a family tree that I should rightfully belong to and there's even a possibility that someone in said tree could be filthy stinking rich. So, yes, all those hours on the Internet looking up genealogy sites is a productive use of my time thank you very much.

Which is the symbol for 'need money'?
The urge to get a tattoo is growing. I don't want anything major, nothing too graphic or colorful. I mean, I'm just starting out here and if I've learned anything from college it's moderation, baby. Moderation. Also, I have a low pain tolerance when it comes to a)needles and b)my skin. I thought maybe one of those cool looking little symbols that nobody really understands might be a good start. On the other hand I'm worried that I'd get maybe the wrong one, and instead of a symbol meaning 'power', for example, I'd end up with 'puppy-dog tails' or 'rainbows' or something. In which case my original notion of getting the tattoo slapped across my forehead would seem like a really bad idea.

I'd rather see eye gouging.
I was always disappointed with the Ultimate Fighting stuff. It's the video game upbringing, I guess, but when I first heard about the concept my imagination conjured up images of a boxer and a black belt facing off, trading shots like a round of Rocky. Turns out its mostly mat/wrestling stuff. I did see this one, though, where the guys were wrestling, and kind of reached a standstill. Then one of the guys starts punching the other guy...in the groin! Like, just straight fist-to-the-jewels work. And, these dudes are like wearing shorts so you could actually....just....i mean...you could see...*shudder*. Every one of us guys watching this doubled over in pain. I think it was the closest I've ever been to fainting.

It was your father's.
Without question the greatest gift that Star Wars has left the world is the infatuation with lightsabers. I'm almost willing to shell out the bucks for the replicas that are out there, despite the fact that they are pretty much totally useless. And if there ever are working models, you can bet I'd probably part with a vital organ to buy one. I wouldn't even miss said organ, 'cause it's a sure thing I'd kill myself after about five minutes of trying to do that cool 360 lightsaber spin.

Trade this.
I know jack about the stock market. I keep hearing about all this online trading, and how with a little bit of cash you can start playing the market all your own, and I'm thinking 'boy I wish I had some cash'. ...Uh, I mean 'no way it could be that easy.' On the other hand, I do know a little about movies. Its only too bad the real market doesn't work like this, i.e. this place starts you off with like 2 million bucks. Someone give me two mill and I'll give the market a try. Seriously. I promise.
Please?

Let's all go to the lobby...
Almost everyone knows about this place, but just in case someone doesn't I'm including it here. Coming Attractions just rocks that much. Trust me on this, I've seen enough movies to know. Come to think of it, I really ought to figure out some way to make money watching flicks. The hours I've logged in the mulitplex are probably reaching some embarrasingly high amounts; its about time I started making some of that money back. Its too bad they don't hire bouncers in theaters; like a big group of guys who beat the living crap out of the first moron who flashes those little laser pens on the screen. Hell, I'd pay money just to see that.

*Search*