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ahhh. am testing to see whether blog entries will appear when the password is there. hahas. I finally passworded my blog. so it's more private than before. thanks damien for the code. hahs. haven't been talking to you for a long time. we sit next to each other at jap class but i'm stoning most of the time. (: hahas. must find time to catch up with each other next term, kay dear?
met ele today. and allison. WHEE! I miss you so much ele dear. just meeting you made me realise that. hope to see you again really really REALLY REALLY soon.
bleargh. ooh and I gave ge-jie a *bone-crunching HUG! hahas. was so glad to see her as well. miss her lots.
didn't give kangya a hug today though. I was hot and sweaty and covered with glove-fluff. bleh.
took the mrt today to meet up with my family so we could have lunch. hahas. I fell asleep standing up. and I HATE my handphone alarm clock. so damn loud and full of vibrations that vibrate the whole bed. stupid thing. but I woke up all right. yes I did. (:
am going to drink more coffee now.
out
sine
sine ranted on Saturday, March 27, 2004 02:09 p.m.
bleh. sleeping late is never a good thing. slept at around 12.20 last night because I doggedly wanted to stay and finish my history homework. bleargh. then silly old me set my handphone alarm clock to 6.55 am the next morning, turned up the volume, and placed it UNDER MY PILLOW.
I was having a really nice dream about ld. seriously. until the phone started beeping and vibrating and making silly noises as if an sms had arrived. or make that a whole string of smses. bleargh. so I woke up, rolled around in bed yelling at my handphone, and finally switched the damn thing off. then I blearily stumbled to the toilet and almost brushed my teeth with face cream.
gah. spent the whole morning writing script for geog with muthu. surprisingly she's a really great person to work with. whee. we were amazingly productive even though everyone else was slacking. big groups never worked out well. half of the people don't turn up, and the people who do don't really do anything.
then I went for japanese, before which I drank TWO CUPS OF STRONG COFFEE!! whee. after that it was just plain crazy. I've been drinking coffee since I was six. hahas. so I'm seriously addicted and ultra-sensitive to the effects of strong, kick-ass caffeine. one day without a bit and I have withdrawal syndromes. bleh. and so throughout japanese, even though my body was whining and trying its very best to shut down and go to sleep, my overactive mind was forcing me to stay very very very awake via a SPLITTING HEADACHE and NAUSEA. of course I absorbed better than usual. normally I just slip in and out of consciousness. bleh. I didn't even hear the people behind me talking away (they always do during japanese class; on bad days I get a bit pissed off). great. I should always drink coffee.
of course right now I'm like some kind of coffee zombie. and the headache simply won't go away. I'm going for cello lessons later. bleh. didn't really practise. will go practise now. hahas. there's mass dance tomorrow. whee! mass dance is fun. yups. as long as you think something is fun, it is fun. yups.
everyone was so quiet yesterday. everyone is so quiet today. come on! break the silence! somebody blog! I neeeeed to hear some kind of noise people. comment. blog. scream. shout. tell me to f--- off. I don't mind. hahas. I'm really cranky. if there were any spelling mistakes it's because I put my spasticated retard touch typing primary school training into use and am typing at lightspeed. ooh han solo. I think obi wan was hot. as in both of them. ben and obi wan. yups. (:
I am definitely sleeping earlier tonight. or maybe not. aah. life is so weird. don't think I'm going to play in the ensemble today. too tired. too much chinese left. bleargh.
ooh I really hope my sms count is still okay. yups.
sine ranted on Friday, March 26, 2004 04:52 p.m.
arrrh. was reading guojun's bloggie just now (sorry but I don't think I should disclose its location) and was quite attracted by the idea of "eyes that just seem[ed] to go on and on". bleh. normally I don't take notice of eyes. eyes are some kind of a liability, aren't they. haha. apart from allowing you to see. because they betray your emotions.
ooh. that aside, I tried looking in the mirror to see if my eyes seemed to go on and on. sadly, I don't think so. I think my eyes are the normal kind. the normal mud-coloured variety. hah. one day I should get lime green contacts or something. to freak people out.
I told my mom about needing a dress and she dug out an old skirt that my aunt had made for my sister eons ago. she died of lung cancer/tb/liver cancer. don't know which. or maybe all of it. bleh. and then my mom dug out this giant green jumper. the wooly kind. very very warm. my sister says I look retarded enough to pass off as akiko. I just need a pink alice band. wow. I think I used to have one, but it's gone now. will go buy one one day. nice fat neon-pink alice band. hahas. (:
bleh.
out
sine
sine ranted on Thursday, March 25, 2004 08:44 p.m.
aah. just realised how much I miss being a small kiddy again. Like say six years old. When I discovered the pure goodness of star wars. Haha. Not the silly special-effects trainride that they try to call star wars, but the real thing. The pulsing adventure and the sincerity of the old star wars movies. that was just classic movie magic. now the only reason I watched ep 1 and 2 (and am going to watch ep 3 in 2005) is because I'm still hoping they'll be able to restore the magic. but ho-hum. sadly george lucas is going downhill. you ass. get someone else to direct, can't you? save us the pain. humph. and of course there's always ewan mcgregor if I get too bored. (:
gah. bought a pair of white shoes. okay. they aren't really that white. about 99% of it is white. pray pray pray it's ok. or else my mom'll make me paint the non-white bits white. yiich.
thanks people for commenting on my comments box. too tiiired to name names. bleargh. horribly sleepy right now.
goodbye
out
sine
sine ranted on Thursday, March 25, 2004 03:50 p.m.
I'm really sorry dear. the underscore lady. please check your mail dear. didn't know it was you. thanks for mailing me, kay?
sine ranted on Wednesday, March 24, 2004 08:43 p.m.
gah. you were right, ge-jie. said something not-so-nice and now I've hurt someone close. bleargh. silly mestupid me. and no, it's not the eviction notice.
sine ranted on Wednesday, March 24, 2004 07:03 p.m.
As we've all seen, there are one or two people posting regularly here, who have yet to introduce themselves. If you want to use some kind of fancy urecognizable screen name that nobody understands, fine, but we need to know who you really are. in the words of damien and evenstar, we don't welcome anons here.
i.e. tell us who you are or LEAVE.
I've not been in the best of moods the past two weeks and I have no patience for the people who post all these nice things on my comments box and don't reveal who they are. how would I know if you were really from my school? if you were really bucklean? if you really knew me? I wouldn't. you might just be any old f---er, dick or harry walking along the street. I don't know who the underscore lady is, for one thing. if I don't know who you are, GET OUT. NOW. Or the next time you post you'll face my wrath. email me toinkycheng[at]yahoo[dot]com if you don't want other people to know who you are.
I don't have the power to block people from my comments box or from reading my blog, but I think general web courtesy is to GET OUT of a place when the people there DO NOT WELCOME you. Okay. I've tried to say it subtly, but nobody realized it. so now I'm giving you all an EVICTION NOTICE. OUT OUT OUT unless I know who you are.
wh00 I was so angry. great to let everything out. bleargh.
sine ranted on Wednesday, March 24, 2004 05:04 p.m.
ooh why am I blogging so much? noooo.
From the association of terribly hardworking and brilliant and definitely-not-like-you chao-muggers who have finished their elearning homework and are now busy revising and preparing themselves for the next term [a.k.a. the ATHBDCWHTEHNBRPTNTM]:
Dearest Sine,
We are gladextremely sorry to inform you that your penitent and persistant applications to join our association has been rejected. Why would we want a lazy prick like you to join usWe are infinitely sorry but it seems that you have failed to meet our entry requirements by miles and miles and miles, which are very, very stringent, as we have made very, very clear before you applied.
You said you were going to finish your elearning homework by the end of monday but tuesday is nearing the end and you still have a fat load left. Of course, you wouldn't think it was a fat load; you're half through it, but you must realise that there are many people like us, you silly girl, who have already finished their elearning homework long ago and now have the time to twiddle their thumbs and write letters to horrifyingly lazy nitwits like you. And even now wethey are revising ourtheir work like crazy and preparing for the rest of the year. How proactive. Unlike you. You have not cleared up your room like you planned to, finished your homework (as we have earlier highlighted), are blogging too much for your own good, are sms-ing all your friends and seniors and running your sms count to an all-time high, are reading (and writing) fanfiction, are talking to your sister who is taking her continual assessments this week, are dreaming of reading peter pan, and are doing countless things that should not be done. Furthermore, you have forgotten completely about your diet and have returned to your old ways though not as bad. Give your position some thought now. You applied to join us under the W.H.E.E. scheme, i.e. the Work very Hard, do your elearningweekhomework and eat eggs/ exercise scheme. Have you Worked very Hard? Have you done your ELEARNINGWEEKHOMEWORK? have you eaten your Eggs? or Exercised? You have NOT worked hard, you have NOT finished your elearningweekhomework, you have NOT eaten your eggs- we know how much you loathe them, and you have NOT exercised enough. But we know what you've done.
We are sorry but once again you have been rejected, sucker.
Good riddanceRegards,
The association of terribly hardworking and brilliant and definitely-not-like-you chao-muggers who have finished their elearning homework and are now busy revising and preparing themselves for the next term [a.k.a. the ATHBDCWHTEHNBRPTNTM] chairman
From the Ministry of Management of Underacheivers Who are Unable to Spell [a.k.a. the MoMoUWaUtS]:
You are officially receiving an invitation to join us under the L.O.S.E.R. scheme, i.e. the Lazy Overweight Silly persons who don't do their Elearningweekhomework and Rarely uses their brains scheme. It is a very special scheme for priveledged people like you, and it would be G-R-E-A-T if you could join us.
We have observed, from your appalingwonderful behavior in the past two days, very very Serious Mental ProblemsValuable Traits that can subsequently be exploitednurtured in the years to come, so that you will be able to destroyserve the country with your immense stupidity and lazinessnatural raw talent. You are like a pile of shit that nobody wantsan uncut diamond waiting to be stepped onturned into something the nation will want to hangbe proud of in the future. Do consider our invitation.
Thank you,
From the Ministry of Management of Underacheivers Who are Unable to Spell [a.k.a. the MoMoUWaUtS]:
sine ranted on Tuesday, March 23, 2004 08:58 p.m.
ooh I'm feeling in a self-derogatory mood today. whee I wonder why.
ewwww... just stuck my finger at the back of my mouth and felt around- half of the top half of my tooth is gone. this is so awful. it's like a square with one quarter cut out. yeah. disgusting. am wondering if the filling fell out or something and the germs have re-infected my mouth and are going to kill me in my sleep. I told my mom about my fear going back to that blur-king dentist and my dire urges to leap at him halfway through the procedure to kill him with his own power drill. ahaha. violent tendancies coming back again.
this sucks. I meant to finish all my elearning homework (why am I the only person who calls it elearning? everyone goes eweek, eweek) yesterday. ALL of it. as in ALL. A.L.L. But nooooo, I didn't. I could have. I should have. but noooo, I didn't. I have 5/12 pieces of homework left. Okay. make that 5.6/12. my sad, sad life. Stupid lazy me. ge-jie did it, though. and she has more homework than I do. she finished he elearning homework in one day. she's going to watch as the rest of usI slog and wade through ever deepening and thickening(sort of like cement) mire of endless procrastination, tears and homework. ooh and I forgot darkness. nothing can happen without darkness. it adds the dramatic feel of stories. darkness. wheeeeeee!
I've been hoping and hoping and hoping that onethirteen will be able to participate in the interclass relay. PLEASE let us be able to participate. bleargh. this is the freakiest situation we've landed ourselves in. whee. sharon signed us up for it, but because almost half the class is representing buckle (and therefore can't do the interclass stuff) and some people are either reluctant or not free, we don't have enough people to make a team. I think we have about six people. WE NEED TWO MORE! I really wanted to participate. really really really. but I'm having ld later. thought it was in the morning; last minute email sadly informed us that it was usual time. sad sad sad. really wanted to go. then I can go support the bucklean trackers and fielders. good luckGod bless! I know you people will rock the place. buckle forever
ahahaha. that aside, happy birthday vivian! viv jie. whatever. yups. honoured to be the sixteenth person to sms you with birthday greetings. ahaha. may all your dreams come true. and may you be happy. and God bless. yeah. love you dear.
ahhh. haven't really gotten over how weird "ge-jie" sounds. whatever.
oooh it's 230 230 230!! yay YAY YAY! can't wait to go for ld. think we're getting the amended script. do you have ANY IDEA what that means? ooh. so excited. oh, am going back to rgp tomorrow. to sit in during drama. I miss all my juniors and alin so much. she came back to direct again. and I think glen went on strike or something so now she's SM. no role. just SM. ooh glen you'll make it big some day. SMs are freaky people. haha evenstar you were freeaky too.
ooh and must give lynette a HUGGIE if I see her later. she's having weeeird mood swings on her blog. aah if you come here lynette I LOVE YOU AND DON'T BE SAD!! whee.
am in a happybouncy mood today.
my previous entry was quite embarrassing. sorry just needed to vent. thx to those people who gave me huggies and encouragement. and that "blank" person who scolded athena, try not to jump to conclusions so easily, kay? yups love you dear.
sine ranted on Tuesday, March 23, 2004 01:58 p.m.
hands over my ears in a jerky rocking motion
shut up shut up shut up get out get out get out shut up get out shut up get out get out get out shut up shut up shut up UP UP get out OUT OUT shut up get out shut up get out shut up get out shut up get out
shut up
oh just piss off. get away from me. don't come near. seriously. do I care? no. go. away. goodbye. so long. don't stay for tea.
s.c.r.a.m.
out
sine
sine ranted on Sunday, March 21, 2004 08:07 p.m.
click here. ahhh. dom with glasses is... weird? whoa.
am booored. boooooooored. boooooooooooooooooored. bo-ring. bo-ring. this is so bo-ringringringringring. b.o.r.i.n.g. boring boring. borng. boing. boingboing.
out
sine
sine ranted on Sunday, March 21, 2004 04:34 p.m.
when you stars start fading out
oh wow. the first day of the entire blasted holiday that I get to wake up at nine, eat breakfast and sit around. no need to hurry to get changed and out of the house, if not to go to school then to go to the blasted dentist's. bleargh. what kind of blasted holiday is this?
wh00 am feeling so retarded.
just give me a break. I'm starting to get pissed. again. wow like that's something new.
sometimes I just want to go to bed.
sine ranted on Saturday, March 20, 2004 06:43 p.m.
am listening to a soundclip of incubus's here in my room. it sounds so... good. ahahaha. would love to get the cd.
If the world would fall apart
In a fiction worthy wind
I wouldn't change a thing now that you're here
Yeah, love is a verb here in my room, here in my room
watched big fish yesteday. tim burton is a genius. Seriously. Even now I'm still raving about the movie. it was just great. So so so so so so so great. I cried at the end. Seems that nowadays I tend to cry very easily when I watch movies. I've loved movies since I was a kid. generally cliched, but that's part of the magic of a good movie- telling the same formula over and over again in so many different formulas. there's nothing new under the sun; it's just that we haven't discovered it yet. ^^ I'm somehow going to buy the dvd when it comes out. ooh and ewan mcgregor is just so good.
ahahaha I used to think he was just completely bishie-licious some years back. maybe I don't now- not so much, but I love his acting. so cute. (: *waves my grubby old "support ewan!" flag energetically*
and yz, I never told you before, but I had the time of my life putting together those posters for you when I was your secret pal. ahahaha. ^^ elijah wood and david wenham and ewan mcgregor. always will remember that. (:
out
sine
sine ranted on Friday, March 19, 2004 02:34 p.m.
my strange fixation with the gargling basin
arrrh. just came back from the dentist's. cannot smile. am numb in the left side of the mouth. bleargh. but the sensation's coming back as I type and soon I'll be screaming blue murder. already as I try to move my mouth I can feel the horrible wounds that the injection needle inflicted on me. bleargh. stupid tooth.
the braces guy came in again before the dentist started on my mouth and he looked at the biig x-ray that I took earlier on. apparently whether I extract my tooth or do a root canal he'll still be putting braces on. but then he said something about waiting three years before fitting them. stupid waiting list. now I'll have some kind of lifetime thing with the dental centre.
the thing was just looong. one hour of pain and numbness in the dentist's chair. at first he didn't put enough local a and it hurt like crazy during the drilling. I didn't know it wasn't supposed to hurt like that so I carried on clenching my fists until that blur king realised that I was in pain. wow. so then he stuck that horrible needle into my mouth again and injected more of that crap into my mouth. then he went in drilling merrily away, while I was getting more distressed by the minute.
it was horrible just hearing the drill eating away at my tooth. I had my eyes shut the whole time, and when I opened them periodically I would see him holding that horrid power drill or a hypodermic needle filled with some freaky substance and hurriedly shut my eyes again.
won't bore you more with hysterical descriptions of the stupid thing.
when he was done, I kind of sat up and he told me to gargle. so I gargled. and gargled. and then sat there staring at the gargling basin wondering whether I should gargle some more. was feeling slightly woozy as I had been desparately trying to make myself fall asleep throughout. bleargh. so then the nurse asked me "are you all right?" and the dentist asked her "what is she doing?" and I blearily said "nothing."
haha. how embarrassing. but it was just so cute when she flushed the gargling basin and I watched the water go shooting into the basin and then go spiralling down into the hole. I was also quite shocked by the fact that I couldn't quite spit the water out, having lost the use of one side of my mouth. bleargh. don't want to talk about it any more.
ah. and so all of you are thinking that this thing is finally over. wh00ps. you were wrong over there. stupid waiting list. I'll be going back in around two weeks to finish the root canal, another time after that to crown the tooth, and another time to get my braces. whatever. this is so horrible. I do not want to go back. bleargh.
argh. am going to sleep now. or mope around. or so something other than blog.
ooh congrats on getting a blog, ge-jie! [whee this sounds like she got married or something. what's so great about a blog?]
out
sine
sine ranted on Thursday, March 18, 2004 12:01 p.m.
shitshitshit I just miss you so much. Knowing that I can't call you up and talk to you just makes me feel so horrible. bleargh. I really loved our conversations. and treasured them so much. and now I need you so much and you're not here. I don't know why but talking to you just makes me feel good. knowing that you wouldn't care if I said something wrong. when I talk to you nothing matters anymore. that's how much you mean to me. Like if I could call you up right now I wouldn't be feeling so ghastly.
sl interview went disgustingly. Not even going to write it down here. too painful to write down. I don't think I'll get in.
inarticulate excuse for a prick.
ooh, and my arse hurts. really. like it aches when I sit down. wonder why. maybe I pulled my muscles when I was sleeping or something. whatever. who cares. It'll go away.
tomorrow I'm going back to the ndc to get my teeth fixed (hopefully). I don't want to get any kind of braces. stupid things. bleargh.
feeling very crappy now. am officially a faliure.
remind me not to think about the interview. I think I've been scarred for life. their cynical, disbelieving faces will forever be imprinted in my mind. at least they didn't really laugh. silly me.
don't bother me. am feeling quite irritable again. or more sloth-like. don't really know.
oh whatever. sucks to the __. don't really give a shit anymore. goodbye, so long, adieu.
out
sine
sine ranted on Wednesday, March 17, 2004 03:17 p.m.
if blood wasn't red in colour it would be the colour of rain.
I'ts raining again. The thunder's really loud. the lightning might come in through the window and kill me anytime.
I love the rain.
I am tired, angry, and absolutely pissed. pissed at myself, pissed at today, and pissed at absolutely everything. the world is never perfect, they say. I'd say the world is perfectly horrible.
don't want to talk about my tooth. it hurts like shit and there's nothing you can do about it.
yes I know I'm stupid in more ways than one. but I should be more aware of my stupidity, shouldn't I? no need to go embarrassing yourself. haha.
get out of here. get out of my life. get out of my thoughts. get out of my blog. get out. now. if I don't know you, don't come near me.
I'm not in a good mood at all. don't try to do anything. once this entry is posted I'll be fine.
just feeling kind of lost right now. am missing some people really really really badly. wish I could have another chat with you right now but you're unreachable. not here for me. no actually I shouldn't have said that. because you're always here for me. even thinking about you I feel happier. thanks so much.
I love you, I love you, I love you.
That's all I want to say.
Until I find a way
I will say the only words I know that
You'll understand.
that was from michelle written by John and Paul. well most of it was by john. except the iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou part. and if paul hadn't written it it'd be so different. that's how important you are to me. if you weren't here everything would be so different.
She asked me to stay and she told me to sit anywhere,
So I looked around and I noticed there wasn't a chair.
That was from norwegian wood. by the beatles. again. Thought the song was beautiful when I first heard it. And then I listened it properly and fell in love with the lyrics.
one day if you'd sit an listen I'd sing a little tune for you and maybe we'd just be happy forever.
out
sine
sine ranted on Tuesday, March 16, 2004 03:43 p.m.
my entire day was wasted. I went for the first aid course in the morning, and then had lunch with my mom. Then we rushed over to the hpb student dental care place thingy. where dental care is FREE up to JC [polyclinic dentist wrote a letter that referred us there], and then I smsed people who all came back with moral support. love you guys [viv-jie, geneve-jie, joanna, shuting]! Sat there for eons sms-ing people and staring at the numbers on the "now serving" chart while my mom read all things great and small (she is absolutely captivated by that book). The room was filled with noisy lower-primary kiddies who just had to insist on running around the place and whizzing around on their heelys, screaming their lungs off. Not funny, especially if you've been sitting there with a pain in your tooth, your head and your arse (from sitting down too long). On the brighter side, the chairs were pastel green. (:
and then that stupid dentist couldn't do anything anyway. silly bochup woman. apparently the hpb can't even do extractions. So my mom got annoyed by that quack dentist woman and decided that we were walking over to the next building, where the ndc was. national dental whatever. Sat there and waited for around an hour or maybe two before we went in to see this other dentist.
he poked around my mouth (as per normal- they'd done that to me two times before already) for a bit and asked me the regular questions before looking interestedly at the xray I took at the polyclinic. my horrible, ugly, slanted, infected, rotten tooth. then he said I should go and get a larger xray, except that it was too late in the afternoon and the xray department was closing. serves them right for making me wait. bleargh.
then he called this other specialist person over. yups. the braces guy. and then he poked around my mouth again and decided that he couldn't do anything either before my xray came out. wow.
okayokay. the whole story. remember the slanted tooth? it's growing in the same angle that a wisdom tooth grows. except that it's not a wisdom tooth. so they'll have to straighten it. but then they'll have to remove the wisdom tooth. the real one. or whatever that's been growing under the surface. so they'll probably do a root canal to my tooth, remove the other wisdom tooth, and straighten my tooth. or something like that, maybe not in that order. whatever.
but that's if I'm lucky. if I'm not they'll just pull the damn thing out.
there is a possibility that they may put braces on my lower set of teeth to keep that silly thing in place, but I'm praying hard that they won't. braces are expensive and troublesome. stupid things.
but if I have to have them they'll be green.
bleargh. am so tired.
redid my homework plan.
out
sine
sine ranted on Monday, March 15, 2004 09:12 p.m.
=___=
don't particularly relish the prospect of having to redo my entire homework plan for this week. my mom strongly believes in not mixing revision with homework, which was exactly what I'd done. so I'm going to have to redo it tomorrow.
my tooth is hurting like crazy. this relentless, horrible, acute throbbing pain that pulses from my tooth to the rest of the back part of my lower left jaw. Just ate one of those tiny, cute little green-and-white painkillers I got from the polyclinic. I know it'll slowly take over my body and the poisons will kill my kidneys and liver bit by bit, but currently I don't give a shit. just need that stupid pain to go away so I can live in peace. tomorrow I'll be going to see the dentist. ugh. mom says that even if they've put you on local a you'll still be able to feel them drilling away. or if the stupid dentist decides that he/she/it can't be bothered to do a root canal on my tooth, I might lose the whole damn thing.
do I look like the sort of person who'd want to lose an entire tooth, however rotten and holey it is?
no.
bleargh the pain is still here. but not too bad.
out
sine
sine ranted on Sunday, March 14, 2004 10:14 p.m.
let me tell you about my horribly tiring day. yay!
wh00ps. it rhymes.
went for house practise, went to the dentist, went to the food and funfair, went to my piano lesson, went to J8, and now I am home. wow. am really tired.
oh yeah. the pain in my tooth. I now know exactly why it's been hurting, and what I should be doing. bleargh. the more I think about it, the more -ouchie- I feel.
the dentist at the polyclinic said that because my jaw was too small (this sucks; how can my jaw be too small?), my last molar had grown out slanted (believe me, I saw an x-ray of it. yiich) and because it's slanted there has been a cavity growing in it all these years and I didn't know about it. so now, when the stupid cavity has finally reached my nerve, it starts to hurt, and everyone has found out about it.
now the worst part. the dentist says that there are only two ways to solve this thing. first is to pull the tooth out (not good, not good), and the second is to do a root canal. i.e. drill hole, suck crap and pus out, fill hole with freaky substance, seal hole.
not good.
nooo. I don't want to go for a root canal. or remove my tooth. or have a slanted molar. bleargh.
I shudder to think of when my wisdom tooth starts growing.
when saturday is confirmed I will have to sit in front of the phone with the entire phone list in front of me and call and call and call.
I am so blooday exhausted. am slipping into tired swearing mood now.
okayokay.
sine ranted on Saturday, March 13, 2004 09:06 p.m.
whee. am sitting around in my green tee and culottes. yay!! hahaha so happy to wear my buckle tee. ^^ was patted on the head today. first time in a LONG while. Last night the pain in my mouth got really really bad. as in horrendously bad. the panadol I had eaten earlier didn't work at all. so I went to bed and squashed my pillow against my cheek in a vain effort to stop the pain or make it better. then I fell asleep and it's not so bad right now. actually it didn't hurt until I drank milo again. bleargh. damn milo.
swim carn later. I think I'll have to sms my mom to tell her that I'll be having class lunch blahblahblah and all and taking a bus with my friends. bleargh. don't know whether she'll object. but as long as I tell, her, I guess.
thanks for commenting, geneve! love you so much. but your richard ego is undesirable. who says? hahas. ^^
had sms convo yesterday. but then I think I was distracting her, so she stopped. (: which was good as well, because I decided to practise my cello.
I'm focusing on good smoothe tone and intonation these few days and playing so carefully and slowly that I never finish all my pieces. I'm going to die for my time pieces later. but my de'ak should be ok. I practised so much. and my scales. my cello is fine now. the pegs were removed and new, fitting ones were put in. so dom never goes that out of tune anymore. just a bit of fine-tuning everytime I take it out. *smiles
and it cost a hundred bucks. bleargh. so I must practise. yups. ^^
I should go do my excel now.
out
sine
sine ranted on Friday, March 12, 2004 08:31 a.m.
sitting and thinking and waiting for the world to stop spinning uncontrollably around you. waiting for that nagging buzz in your brain to come skidding to a resolute halt. waiting for all the clocks to just cease their incessant ticking just for that tiny moment, so you can savour that warm fuzzy feeling just one second more. waiting for the waterfall to freeze mid-movement, trapping that supreme power forever in a beautiful casing of solid, glistening ice, more beautiful than any diamond.
cliche me. turn me into a stereotype, a run-of-the-mill paper cutout that lost its shimmer eons ago. make me lose my form my substance my very soul. my adaptation. give me only one name. one title. one label. cliche.
give me your name and I will turn it into a word. a beautiful word. a horrible word. the kind of word that a child whispers to her teddy bear before she goes to bed. the kind of magic, cruel word that can bring a nation to its knees. give me your name and I will turn it into a word. you will turn it into a word. It is your name and you will shape its character.
life doesn't wait for you. if it's in front of you it just runs faster and faster. if you're faster it'll reach out with a vicious claw to drag you back into its shroud of despair. But yet in life people find love. in love people find life. and death.
asai takeshi stood in the rain that had washed the very colour from his eyes, his face, his hair.
I'll give out kisses on valentines day and they'll melt you heart but I know I should have bought roses for everyone except that my money ran out but my heart never runs out of kisses.
realised that there are some people who refer to me as sine, and others who refer to me online using my given name. I don't really mind anything. just find it strange. people who first know me don't call me sine. they call me by my given name. people who know me better call me sine. because they know me. this is strange. but I love all of you. glad you're happy. there was nobody sad today. except maybe me. but I'm happy. yup. I'm happy.
my mouth hurts because I might have some kind of infection or something. don't know what it is but am going to see the dentist next week. right now I'm eating panadol that doesn't work. bleargh. okay so the pain did go down a bit but it didn't disappear. bleargh. whatever.
happy birthday onethirteen.
ghastly weather these days. my white shoes are brownish-yellow.
love talking to you.
the BIRTHDAY PRESENT for her. yay yay yay! but the birthday is soooo far away. bleargh. this is soooo sad. so I have to take care of the birthday present now and shower it with love and kisses so that on her birthday when she gets it it'll be so loved that she'll feel it too.
nuff said. am leaving.
out
sine
sine ranted on Thursday, March 11, 2004 09:40 p.m.
And when your world starts spinning down
take a ride and you’ll feel what you never found
When the stars start fading out
You hear the angels laughing without a sound
ahaha. ^^ Feeling quite crazy right now. You know, the nice smiley kind of crazy. The kind of feeling that makes you do crazy things, like telling a complete stranger that you loved them, or eating an apple, or just laughing. crazy and simple and happy.
I know why I was so sad/tired/shitty these few days. IT'S THAT TIME OF THE MONTH AGAIN!
*whee
don't know why I'm so happy, but perhaps this has something to do with everyone being happy again. EVERYONE IS HAPPY! YAY! (:
have never felt so good.
`love the kindness campaign official website
drop by, will you? thanks.
sine ranted on Thursday, March 11, 2004 04:03 p.m.
maybe I should password-protect my page. yups. but might have to go get the code from damien or something. because there are obviously some people whom I don't want to read my blog. nope, don't get flustered now and think it's you. it isn't, whoever you are. If I gave you my bloggie willingly, it's not you. bleargh. this sucks.
H. U. N. G. R. Y.
stupid sine. why am I so HUNGRY
alyssa's back in school. *kiss
didn't really talk to anyone properly today. yesterday I had a proper conversation with geneve. where you really talk and don't talk nonsense. just semi-nonsense. whatever. whined to damien all through japanese today.
see see see. when I see you, it's just a hi. bleargh. whatever. what happened to our conversations? it just disappeared. why is this happening? I thought it was going okay. but of course you're busy. hah. of course. busy woman.
must. study.
general fatigue is coming in. I live my life by the day now. just think of sleep. sleeep. sleeeeep.
oh, and I lost 2.2 kg.
only.
WHAT'S MY BLOODAY PROBLEM.
fat girl. haha. why is it that some people can just carry on eating their ice cream and all and LOSE WEIGHT, while I have to feel absolutely guilty everytime I eat something.
maybe I should just live on water and bread or something. then I'll get skinny. haha.
nah. water and bread and yoghurt and veggies and chicken once a week.
funfunfun. will go tell mom about it later. she'll probably scold me.
have to go study now. or bathe. or whatever.
I'm pissed with that certain someone, damien you know who she is. you arse. sometimes I don't know why but I get so pissed with you. just SHUT UP with your suanning and your crap. just go and live by yourself and stop making me feel so crappy. I see you in the morning and 90% of the time you've already spoiled my entire day. haha. so there.
ooh, and so they think `love is a joke?
maybe I should try to love you.
but I know I love everyone else already. the REST OF THE CLASS. AND ALL MY JIEJIEs.
as they say, being childish sometimes really relieves stress.
out
sine
sine ranted on Wednesday, March 10, 2004 05:47 p.m.
it's quite sad how you can't always be in touch with people all the time. There are always times when you're not so close to someone, and are closer to another person, and there are other times when you kind of migrate somewhere else. it's just life I guess. I'm losing touch with so many people! nooooo! there are some people who I see every morning, but the most I do with them is to exchange greetings and maybe hug. it's sad, really, that way. that we're all to busy to connect. and then there are other people who aren't with me, that I miss so terribly. bleargh. this is so sad.
sine ranted on Tuesday, March 9, 2004 09:11 p.m.
okay. short blog short blog.
ermmmm... oh yeah, everyone is sick. and taller than me. ^^ or else they broke their arm. poor alyssa. I LOVE YOU AND GET WELL SOON!
shuting was going around with this thingy for junli today and got me to sign as well. haha. I was the first one on that side. ^^ but later on we all realised that everyone had written the same "get well soon!" message. bleargh. talk about originality.
geneve was sick. so I called her just now and proceeded to talk for a veeeery long time. (:
tried to hug kangya jie today and ended up almost making her spill her fried rice.
still owe my angel her letter
still owe mae-jie her letter
still owe kangya jie her letter
bleargh.
tomorrow I'm being weighed and today I ate twisties and chocolate. wow. like my last supper or something.
today lyss couldn't come for LD and yingsze stood in for her. she's good (obviously), but I still miss alyssa. GET WELL SOON! [this is partly due to the fact that we were just getting used to being taller than our "dad"]
argh. have to go.
out
sine
sine ranted on Tuesday, March 9, 2004 08:43 p.m.
okay. the NEW template has arrived. Made this eons ago; but have only just put it up. elijah wood again. ^^ oh yeah, and some previous entries that you might not have read have been archived. if you don't want to miss them, go look. yup. (:
out
sine
sine ranted on Sunday, March 7, 2004 08:48 p.m.