sine ranted on Sunday, October 5, 2003 01:28 p.m.

If there was a hell, I'm sure this is how it'd smell

What do you think? No man's an island? well duh, you're right. But I can't help feeling kind of sad right now. oh well. must be my fault too. I guess everyone's sick of me already. who gives a damn? What the heck? It doesn't matter anymore, does it? Goodbye, so long, adieu.

Sorry about that. Just feeling slightly detached from my "friends". Hah. See that, people? There are inverted commas around the adjective that describes you. To tell you the truth, I've never really had a really, really great friend to start with. No, not since P4. People change, you know. Someone who was my good friend some time ago can become just someone you know by name in a matter of a few days. or maybe a week.

Yeah, yeah- I'm getting savage here. I know. I'll probably cool down after a while, but this is just to speed things up a little. I'm not going to mention names or give clues- nah, not like tigger. actually, I've forgiven tigger already, because unlike many, tigger doesn't come back to hurt you more. You people just keep on hurting, hurting, hurting... I'm getting quite disheartened with everything. everyone keeps turning around to reject you and then they go on their way. yeah, if you want to make rounds and then come back to be my friend again, fine, but why do it all at the same time? heck. everythings going wrong. first for my writing, then in church, then at home, then at school. nobody's going to be reading this- fine! I give up on you. I'll just be patient. besides, I need anger management. :) I will just smile. smile and smile and smile and be nice to those people who deserve it and to those who don't. maybe one day you'll know who you are, if you actually have the brains to decipher it. sucks to you.

ooh, wasn't that childish? :) was that a fire drill, or the real thing? you'll just have to guess.

out

sine

sine ranted on Monday, September 22, 2003 02:10 p.m.

adieu
heck, I'm feeling kind of sad today; some friend at church went off and started hanging out with some other people. It's not that I'm selfish or anything, but she's been quite a great friend and now she's *kind of* ignoring me. I told my mom and she says I should just forget about it for a bit; everything would be ok next week. I hope so. but thanks mom; the ache of rejection has dulled. went to mos burger, and my entire family ended up eating cheeseburgers while good old me went to eat a rice burger. only then did mom decide that she should have ordered one as well. but it was a great family lunch- I love my parents and my sister, even though sometimes they suan me for loving anime. :) Actually, I think mom likes Rurouni Kenshin. Go mom! She's great. :) I might not think so a while later when we start work, but I'm posting it here first so I'll remember. Am still missing Orion, but now I have a valid reason for leaving it to "breathe", as FC-san puts it. I need to get my morals and story themes in order before I proceed, and even though I've thought of it already, I'm going to let it fester for a bit.
Orion is a tale of a young assassin who one day realizes that all he believes in is incorrect; that his entire understanding of the meaning of life is wrong.
That is my current theme- about how truth and understanding can sometimes be wrong. I don't mean Orion to be moralistic, but I do want to get my own morals straight. I might read and watch stuff like Kenshin and Saiyuki and RaVe, but it's still important that the wrong values imparted in them do not derail all the things I've been thought at church and at home for my entire life. Heh. That's why I'm paying even more attention in church and Sunday sch. On a lighter note, my fingers are twitching from lack of writing. :) have started on a short unguided Hakkai vignette with lots of poignant descriptions. something weird about how "friendship becomes brotherhood" and stuff like that. And I'm making it a point not to read any Saiyuki fanfic, so you must understand that I haven't done a market study, even though I know what kind of yaoi pairings there are out there. I can assure you that whatever I'm writing is definitely het. no yaoi, no yuri. It's against my principals. :)

have to go use my fingers and keyboard now. and thanks to damien-san, who was the only one who posted on my zonkboard besides me. is everyone else dead, or are they mugging?

out

sine

sine ranted on Sunday, September 21, 2003 12:58 p.m.

yay! finally, a nice, arty layout!

Take a deep breath.
close your eyes for 30 seconds.
open them, and...

STARE AT KONZEN!!!

don't I love my new layout? fragments is so much better than spotlight!! I had a really hard time planning this out, and somehow, the originally white website has morphed into yet another black one!! but i ditched the lighting effects- not many people are as bright as hakkai and spike. *wink*

WTC drew Ottorino!! YAY! JUMP FOR JOY!! I was drooling over him today; he looked just as I thought he would look. :) my dream came true. Thanks ting!!

had listening today; was sitting in front of the speakers, so when james leo, some guy in the english exam, started shrieking, I got it full blast. My ears hurt. *whine*

I really miss orion and ottorino now. :( It seems so empty without them. I feel lost with nothing to write. *sob* aa. nevermind. exams will be over soon. then I can start writing again; and maybe show it to my mother this time... :)

oh, and try putting your mouse over Konzen. I was laughing when I did, even though I was the one who put it there. yeah, I know I'm dumb.

I have to go bathe; maybe I'll blog later, just for my new layout. *grins retardedly*

out

sine

sine ranted on Saturday, September 20, 2003 01:22 p.m.

orion V6 is out

sigh... I am really, really tired after such a hectic week. :) printed orion V6 out; am somewhat proud of it right now. if you read the a/n (for those who have authorization) you'll know who I have to thank for helping me on my feet again.

as you can see, I changed the layout. you know what? I think it sucks. big time. I'll probably be changing it again this weekend or next, but yeah, asap. when compared to my first call me, call me, rain I and rain II layouts, Spotlight seems clumsy and well... to big. I personally liked call me, call me very, very much because of it's surrealistic feeling. Of course, I am also very much in love with that pic of hakkai and the lighting effects, but I can't help having the sinking feeling that the artistic value of my layouts is going down. heck... it's time for something drastic...
*suddenly has lots of ideas*:
1. Konzen's shoulders.
Yeah, I'd love to do something which includes Konzen's shoulders; pay some tribute to them. :)
2. More Hakkai!
I'm still looking for a sexier pic of hakkai, but if I cant find one, well... we'll just have to make do. :)
3. Return of Spike!!
I want to get a nice pic of spike; nothing fancy, brush it up a bit, add some song lyrics, and put it up. I really love the way spike is drawn; it is so different from all the regular animes. while call me, call me had spike in it, I had focused too much on the lighting and the starkness of the pic that I forgot about his face. :)

I have to go do my hmwrk; will blog later; tell me what you think about my choices; ting I hope you'll have fun with orion V6!!!

out.

sine.

sine ranted on Friday, September 19, 2003 04:38 p.m.

yay! archived and woohooo!!
will blog later; just want to say that I'VE ARCHIVED MY PAGE!!

sine ranted on Friday, September 19, 2003 04:29 p.m.