Wednesday, August 27, 2003 02:02 p.m.
This was Peter's theory of self-expression. The paradox of being a professional artist. How we spend our lives trying to express ourselves well, but we have nothing to tell. We want creativity to be a system of cause and effect. Results. Marketable product. We want dedication and discipline to equal recognition and reward. We get on our art school treadmill, our graduate program for a master's in fine arts, and practice, practice, practice. With all our excellent skills, we have nothing special to document. According to Peter, nothing pisses us off more than when some strung-out drug addict, a lazy bum, or a slobbering pervert creates a masterpiece. As if by accident.
Tuesday, August 26, 2003 08:19 p.m.
What up, what up? Spent some money today. Bought Diary. I spent most of the afternoon reading it. It's good, but I expected no less. Haven't gotten far enough to determine if it's great yet. I'll probably have it finished before the week is up. Woot.
I also bought a new pair of pants and ordered a new henna kit and champa incense online. All necessary, I assure you.
Heh. My RA just came in and smelled my incense. I'm getting written up. Yay. I swear, my room would smell like musty ass without it. Oh well. I've always wanted to be a rebel.
Anyway. What was I saying? I forget.
The henna I was doing on my hand yesterday looks awful now. I suck.
My drawing of Sarasvati isn't looking so hot either. I haven't given up yet, though. Maybe it can be salvaged. I suck. The muse has abandoned me.
I've got homework to do. I should get to that.
Tuesday, August 26, 2003 12:38 a.m.
Wow. I've forgotten how much I really, really like SOAD. I usually have to pull out some mp3s before I'm reminded of that. Like Blue. And The Metro. I love The Metro. Good stuff. Storaged and Marmalade. And "SOAD vs. Wu Tang - Shame on a Nigga" is awesome, yo. I mean. For seriously.
I'm angry because my PS2 is dying. It doesn't want to read half my disks, and now it's begun to make a LOT of noise when it's trying to read a disk. I think I'm just going to have to take it to get it repaired. And Soul Calibur is finally coming out, too. How depressing.
Chuck Palahniuk's latest, Diary, is finally coming out this week too. Tomorrow, presumably. Trip to the bookstore, yay. Since I'll be video-gameless it seems, I'll definately have time to read. I might pick up my own copy of Lullaby, since it's in paperback now. Then I'll have all of Palahniuk's books. :o I need to pick up Katherine Dunn's "Geek Love" too. That should keep me going through my PS2lessness. I should read more anyway.
This guy is great:
This henna on my hand is starting to smell weird. Maybe I've been exposed to it too long or something. Going on three hours now. I need a new tube thingy so I won't have to use these annoying stencils. Guess I'll have to look online for something. Typing is going to totally mess it up. :/ Either that, or I'll get henna paste all over my keyboard.
I need to visit that vintage clothing store in town and see what they've got going on. I really need to work on my proto-punk hipster chick look. Right now I'm more of a nerd-who-got-a-couple-of-shirts-from-Hot-Topic.
The sky is falling, I don't care.
Not my favorite song, but I feel good. I really do.
Friday, August 22, 2003 12:03 a.m.
1. Down the hall from me there's this girl who has a lot of pictures of herself taped to the outside of her door. I mean... a LOT. I would understand if they were fun pictures of her with her friends, but they aren't. They're of just her. Glamour shot type things. Beauty queen stuff. It's odd enough that she's got SO many pictures of herself... but to put them all on the outside of your door...? What is that? Advertising? What fascinates me, though... is her smile. It's the strangest expression I've ever seen. She's got one of those toothy pageant smiles, but it looks more forced than usual. And her eyebrows go up and slightly scrunch in the middle. It looks like she's really got to go to the bathroom or she's about to burst into tears.
2. I cracked open a can of vienna sausage today. (I'm a gourmet like that.) After struggling to get the first one out (am I the only one that has this problem?) I saw something I'd never seen before. That particular sausage was the end piece. It was rounded on one end. I've never in my twenty-one years seen the end piece of a vienna sausage. And I have eaten a LOT of vienna sausage in my twenty-one years. I kinda wish now I hadn't eaten it, so I could show it off. It was a little obscene, though. >.>
I have to get up early... I need to go to bed. G'night.
Monday, August 18, 2003 09:25 p.m.
Lightening just struck somewhere really close. o.o There was a bright flash and suddenly a thunderclap that rattled my window.
The new Chuck Palahniuk book comes out this month. I can't wait. The main character in this one is a woman. An artist, too, if I'm not mistaken. I enjoyed Invisible Monsters so much, I expect good things from this. If I can identify so closely with a former model with a mutilated face, imagine where I can go with a dejected female artist. :D I believe that once I finish, I'll either have some kind of epiphany or become incredibly depressed.
I think Xplo-sama would be proud. I've made progress in being mean to random internet idiots. Yet, I should have ignored this guy way sooner than I did. But I was bored.
prash_hero: hi sweety
Wasn't that entertaining? I think from now on, no more mercy for the internet idiots. Annie's goin' hardcore, y'all.
Monday, August 18, 2003 01:07 p.m.
I've just got to figure out where to put this stuff. I need more sticky things...
Classes are good so far. French will probably be easy. I'm excited to get back into graphic design. I've got to go print out old stuff tomorrow to show Mr. Gibson on Wednesday. I forgot my portfolio at home. x.x I am dum. This afternoon is Photography. Whee.
This weekend was good. Didn't do much. Went and saw one of Bryan's bands Friday night. Saturday... I think I played videogames. I forget. Yesterday... more videogames and a trip to the sticks.
Yeeeah.
Saturday, August 16, 2003 07:12 p.m.
Just a quick note to tell you three things.
1. Fresh strawberries and two packets of Splenda is better than any candy or sweet pastry you can think of. Yum.
2. I am awesome. I bought a previously rented copy of Xenosaga for twelve dollars and some change. Aw yeah.
3. I really like my dark hair. I think I'll keep it this way for a long time.
Friday, August 15, 2003 09:05 p.m.
Hi kittens. I've got a hot cup of sweet green tea and I'm listening to Diana Krall. Life is a good place right now.
Last week I found out that when Clairol says "Dark Blonde" they mean "Auburn." Today I found out that when Clairol says "Dark Brown" they mean "Really Fuckin' Dark Brown. Black."
So yeah. My hair is pretty much black at the moment. My mom would kill me. It'll probably wash out into a warmer brown after a few shampoos. Secrectly, though... I like the black. I think it makes me look edgy. Veronica had black hair. All the cool goth and punk rock chicks have black hair.
It's a shame I'm such a poser.
I wanna talk to someone right now, but I'm not sure who I should tell this to.
Friday, August 15, 2003 01:36 p.m.
So yeah. Back in school. Well, back at school.
Classes don't start til Monday. I'm a little anxious.
My room here is nice. I was a little disappointed in the size at first. It's tiny compared to the room I had last year. But I have it all to myself. It's cozy and tidy and I like it. It's a nice little place to come to when you've been trudging around outside in the heat. It's nice and cool and smells of Green Champa incense. You get this pleasant puff of cool, perfumed air when you open the door.
If you happen to be at Edgewater Mall, stop by the Hot Topic there and see if you can get a couple more boxes of Puspa's Green Champa for me. It's a dollar per bright green and red patterned box. I'll pay you back. I love the way this stuff smells and I'll run out soon.
It took me a while to get my computer hooked to the interweb. Turns out I packed the wrong cable whenI left home. They all look alike to me. Now my only problem is Internet Explorer isn't wanting to work right. I'm pretty sure I've got the proxy settings right.
Oh well. Mozilla is here for me. Just have to transfer my bookmarks.
I need to go to Wal-Mart. My third trip in as many days. Mebbe I'll take a nap first, though.
Tuesday, August 12, 2003 1:53 p.m.
So yeah. That time of year again. I've just finished loading all my stuff into the van and my car. Just hanging out now til my dad gets home and then I'm off to Columbus again.
It's hard to believe summer is over already. There were parts that seemed to drag on forever, but now it seems like it flew by. I didn't get a chance to do any of the things I wanted to do, it seems. Sort of disappointing, but not all bad I suppose. I don't get as many nice goodbyes as I did last year. I guess people are used to the idea of me being gone. ^^;; Oh well.
I'm not really looking forward to getting up bright and early tomorrow morning to haul all this stuff back up the the third floor of Kincannon Hall. Supposedly this is the last time I'll be doing it, though.
I'm bored now. Maybe I'll play one last game of Princess Maker before I leave.
I'll see you all once I get my interweb hooked up in my room.
Friday, August 8, 2003 03:14 p.m.
Photoshop artists... we have been put to shame. This was done entirely in Photoshop with a MOUSE. I feel so inadequate. (Don't worry as it's loading... it cuts off before there's any nekkid boobies.)
Never fear, though. There is a tutorial.
Well. Today was my last at work and I got to go home early. Yay. :D I was kinda sad to say goodbye to people, but now I'll get to sleep in. Til classes start. >.>
Yay. :D
Wednesday, August 6, 2003 06:20 p.m.
I'm talking about the Ashlynns, Brielynns, Mackenzies, and Tristans of the world. Parents name their children these horrible names so they'll be unique. They want their children to stand out in classrooms full of Jennifers, Matthews, Christophers, and Melissas. My grade school class rooms were full of those names... but parents these days seem to not realize that now they are full of Ashlynns, Brielynns, Mackenzies (Oh, God... the Mackenzies...), and Tristans.
People, don't expect a trendy, made up name to make your kid unique. You're just pre-labeling the poor thing. If your kid is going to be "unique", they'll be the one to do it. Not you.
Whatever happened to nice, traditional names? What happened to family names? (Keep in mind, I'm talking white bread traditional because I'm talking about white bread kids. Kayleigh isn't going to fare better if you change her name to Nataraja.) People always complain that traditional names are just too common, but there are plenty of uncommon ones. There are no more little girls named Olivia, Sophie, Evelyn, or Kathleen. No more little boys named Franklin, Isaac, Malcolm, or (dare I say it) Bartholemew.
And if one more person spells it "Emmaleigh," I'll scream.
Of course, I'm all about some non-traditional names too. As long as they aren't made-up. I've always thought that Sunday, February and August would make good names. Hippy-esque names always kinda appealed to me too. I think that's the artsy-fartsy in me coming out. But if you're going to name your kid some random word, make sure it doesn't have some super-deep meaning. The deeper the meaning of the word... the sillier it sounds as a name. I can't help but wonder how many 16-year-old pregnant Destinies there are in the world. Journey is a dumb one too.
I think I'm going to name my kids like I name my Sims. I grab my trusty copy of "The New Webster's Dictionary" and randomly scan pages for something that sounds like a name.
Some of my favorites:
The best ones come from a medical dictionary:
Well. I think that's all the ranting I'm going to do for today.
Later,
Tuesday, August 5, 2003 02:01 p.m.
I've gots a question for all you computer people out there. My little iMac is hurting for some more RAM, I think. Photoshop has a hard time keeping up with me and The Sims is nearly unplayable it's so slow.
I've got two slots in the back of my machine. Currently I have a 128MB stick and a 64MB stick back there. Would it be worth the $50 and the trouble to replace my 64MB with a 128MB? Will going from 192 to 256 speed up my computer significantly? Any other ways I can speed up my poor little guy?
In other news, my mom watched FLCL on Cartoon Network with me and my brother last night. I'm suprised she sat through it. I was able to explain the significance of drinking after someone, but not the robot growing out of that kid's head...
That kitty was cute, though.
Tuesday, August 5, 2003 08:17 a.m.
I did get a lot of hair cut off yesterday, maybe that had something to do with it. Okay.. it wasn't that much hair, but it's shorter now than it's been in a long time. It's one of those haircuts where everyone automatically notices you've gotten one. :o It's fluffy right now, but I've got some texturizer so that I can make it all chunky and rockstar-like. I like it. :o
I spent lots of money at Wal-Mart yesterday. Had to buy a scale to take to school, a yoga mat for Pilates class, and a new bookbag. It's so hard to find a "bookbag" and not a "backpack" these days. I just need to carry books around... I'm not going mountain climbing. The little cd player pocket with the headphone hole is pretty neat, though... but I don't need a secret insulated compartment plus two water bottle pockets. I certainly don't understand what the bungees on the front are for and knowing people in Columbus, the reflective taping won't do me any good. But at least it's light blue... so it's somewhat feminine looking.
I suppose I should start packing myself up soon. I don't want to be stuck doing that all weekend when I'd rather be out with friends having my last hoo-rah down here.
I haven't heard anything from MTAG or MESG, so I'm getting worried. I neeeeeeeed that money. For seriously. I'm probably stressing over nothing, though. Hopefully.
I also need to get some tea tree oil. I hear it's really good for acne... and I need help. I'm so tired of having pimply skin. ;.; I should drink more water too.. doesn't that help your complexion?
One last thing I still need... a really good neck rub. My neck and shoulders have been so tense lately it's not even funny. I've got a headache right now, in fact... and it won't go anywhere til I go home. ;.;
So yeah. Good morning. :p
Monday, August 4, 2003 02:44 p.m.
Anyway.. now to talk about stuff I actually got done. I'm feeling pretty accomplished, you know.
First of all, I FINALLY finished Xenogears last night. I played all day and finished up at midnight. Whee. :D It took me a YEAR, but I'm done. Will can finally get his game back. I wonder if he even remembers that it's his... >.> Anyway, the end was good. Bart is still my favorite, even though his dub voice kinda sucks. He's still cute. :o
I also finished another drawing. I'm happy with the way it turned out, even though I can sit here and nitpick it to death. Like the funny angle of her hand, or the spot I completely forgot to shade, the fact that I'm light years from understanding light like my Xplo-sama, or the way the gold just looks weird. I *am* happy with the fact that the hand looks somewhat like a hand and that I did most of the shadows on the drapery without a reference AND I actually created a background. All in all, I guess I am proud of my Parvati.
Okay. Problem. I distinctly remember there being three items on this list. I just can't remember the third one. Maybe it'll come to me later...
Monday, August 4, 2003 09:25 a.m.
Last night, before I went to bed I had this awful headache. Bad video game ergonomics. Anyway, I couldn't find an Aleve, so I took the first painkiller I could find. I popped three Excedrin and hopped into bed.
Well, I tossed and turned for hours. Finally, it's 2:30 AM and I'm laying in bed WIDE awake. And then it dawns on me. Excedrin has caffine. Lots of it. omg, i am dum.
Around 4:00 I wander into the living room to find the Excedrin bottle and see just how much caffine it has... cause I'm still WIDE awake. The bottle tells me that one dose has the same amount of caffine as a cup of coffee. And a dose is two. So... I drank a cup and a half of coffee and then tried to sleep. Well, I didn't. At all.
I don't feel sleepy now, just a little out of sorts. Kind of medicine-heady. It's a good thing I slept late yesterday... I'd be dead by now. I'm going to crash hard this afternoon, though. I might need another Excedrin to get me through the work day.
I discovered that whatever logical thinking areas I might have in my brain completely shut down around 4:30AM. The newspaper delivery guy came by at 4:50... and there's one of those strobe type lights on the top of his truck... like mail trucks. So I'm laying in bed and I notice this weird pulsing light. At first I thought it was lightning... but it kept going and going and going. I immediately got freaked out. I knew, with all certainty, that there were either aliens in my front yard... or some sort of disco axe murderer.
Remember. I am an idiot.
I got up and crawled to the foot of the bed to the window with my heart racing (the caffine might have been helping here). I veeeery slowly opened a space in the blinds to peek through... so I wouldn't attract the attention of whatever it was that was out there and waiting to kill me.
That wouldn't have happened if the paper were delivered at 11:00PM.
I did some not as stupid things this weekend. I'll write another entry later.
Just felt the need to share a passage from Diary. Just to show you why I love Chuck Palahniuk.
Some idiot who's not afraid to say what they really love.
Background Noise: AFI - Death of Seasons
Background Noise: System of a Down - Blue
prash_hero: u mad at me
prash_hero: ?
crazymoondream: I find you incredibly annoying.
prash_hero: i am in love with u
I just want to feel good.
The train is leaving, she don't care.
She just wants to feel good.
The world is dying, we don't care.
They just want to feel good.
It's all over, we don't care.
They just want to feel good.
I saw two strange things today.
I just watched The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys. It was pretty good. Made me cry a little.
crazymoondream: Please don't call me "sweety".
prash_hero: how abt sexy
crazymoondream: No.
crazymoondream: Don't act so familiar when you don't even know me.
prash_hero: honey
prash_hero: ?
prash_hero: hmmmmmmmmmmm
prash_hero: thats true
prash_hero: but i think v r chatting second time
prash_hero: so i know u little bit
crazymoondream: The second time.
crazymoondream: That's it.
prash_hero: yup
prash_hero: its enuf for me
crazymoondream: It's not enough for me.
crazymoondream: So stop with the stupid pet names or this will be the last time, okay?
prash_hero: hmmmm
prash_hero: than u can know me more
prash_hero: so what shud i call u
prash_hero: her majesty
crazymoondream: How about my name, huh?
prash_hero: her highness
prash_hero: whats ur name
crazymoondream: Annie. And if you keep getting smart, you're getting blocked.
prash_hero: ok Annie
crazymoondream: Better.
prash_hero: howz that
prash_hero:
crazymoondream: "Better."
prash_hero: so whats new in life ANNIE
crazymoondream: Okay, asshole. If you're going to get bent out of shape over having to use my fuckin' name, this conversation is over.
prash_hero: u bitch ,, i just said ANNIE
crazymoondream: In all caps, like you've got some major problem with it.
prash_hero: and i dont know if u have fucking NAME
prash_hero: hope u mind ur language
crazymoondream: If you've got a problem with my language, you can stop talking to me.
prash_hero: so does caps means problem
prash_hero: ok
prash_hero: i will say annie
crazymoondream: Alright. Now we're getting somewhere.
prash_hero: ok annie
prash_hero:
crazymoondream: Uh huh.
prash_hero: lol
prash_hero: so whats new in life
prash_hero: or i can say howz life treating u
crazymoondream: I'm okay, I suppose.
prash_hero: kool
crazymoondream: Yeah.
prash_hero: so what u do in spare time
crazymoondream: Sit around and bitch at strangers on the internet.
prash_hero: hahahahaha
prash_hero: so u bitch ?
prash_hero:
crazymoondream: Yeeeeeeah...
prash_hero: kool
prash_hero: thats nice
crazymoondream: Uh huh.
prash_hero: we can rename u
prash_hero: Annie,,, The Bitch
prash_hero: lol
crazymoondream: Or not.
prash_hero:
prash_hero: ?
crazymoondream: What?
prash_hero: nothing
crazymoondream: Obviously.
prash_hero: hahahahaha
crazymoondream: Woo. Fun times.
prash_hero: so when u moving to portland
crazymoondream: I'm not.
prash_hero: how come
prash_hero: ur profile says
crazymoondream: My profile says I was thinking about it.
prash_hero: ok
prash_hero: me gtg
prash_hero: bye
prash_hero: take care
prash_hero:
crazymoondream: Thank god.
prash_hero: why god
prash_hero: thank me
prash_hero: lol
prash_hero: !!!
prash_hero: bye
prash_hero: have a sweet night
prash_hero: annie !!!
crazymoondream: You're an idiot.
prash_hero: u r bitch,,, as u said
prash_hero:
crazymoondream: Thanks.
prash_hero: u r welcome my friend
crazymoondream: Go away already.
prash_hero: why
prash_hero: u scared
crazymoondream: Scared? Of what?
crazymoondream: Your bad grammar, horrible spelling, and retarded netspeak?
crazymoondream: Yeah. I'm terrified.
prash_hero: be scared
prash_hero: good for u
prash_hero: bye for now
crazymoondream: Ta.
I bought posters. :o I got a Fight Club poster, a Tournee Chat Noir poster (turn of the century graphic design, yay), and two little foil prints of Lakshimi and Parvati. No. I don't know what's up with me and the Indian thing either.
Background Noise: Clutch - Rising Sun
Background Noise: Diana Krall - I Remember You
Background Noise: Clutch - Hale Bopp Blues
Background Noise: The Pillows - Advice
I like The Pillows. They are groovy. "Hybrid Rainbows" is the only song that I don't really really like, but it's growing on me. It still gets points for being in Japanofrancais. And the loud part is nice. "Advice" is awesomeness, though.
Background Noise: Poe - Beautiful Girl
I found an amusing bad baby name site. I found it amusing because I've got a somewhat seething hatred for most trendy/modern names.
Oriel
Topia
Terzarima
Soutane
Raglan
Pecuniary
Campanile
Empyema (As in Caitelynn Empyema, also a collection of pus in the body cavity.)
Xyster (Excellent name for a little boy. It means "surgical instrument used to scrape bone.")
Myiasia (Really gross... but doesn't it sound pretty?)
Lingua
Adnexa
Ulorrhagia (Wow. So exotic.)
Loxia
Mittelschmerz (Okay. This is silly beyond sarcasm... but damn. It's a great word. And it's a REAL word. Wow.)
(Uniquely) Elizabeth Anne
Me again. I'm bored and my head still hurts.
My morning started off very nicely. I stepped on the scale (even though I said I wouldn't for another week...) and found out that there's now twenty pounds less of me. I even weighed on two different scales, twice... just to make sure. So.. woot. Maybe I will be sans twenty-five by the time classes start. Awesomeness.
Two-thirty pee em. I've been up well over twenty-four hours, and I'm only slightly tired. I got my daily headache, so I took a dose of Excedrin. Just the one coffee cup, though.
Okay. So I'm an idiot. Wanna know why? Thought so.
