a thousand miles

It's been a long nite. A long walk filled with a long list of occurences. First things first...I dunno why I snapped but at that point(maybe its the alcohol), I felt that I was right. The notion that I had of how friends should be was rather singular. Somehow...I wasn't reflecting that notion on myself. I was being selfish I suppose. I admit it. I was. Friends should somehow be discerning but I wasn't...at that point of course. An apology would be the right thing to do. 'Cos friends are the most important persons in your life(after girlfriends and families that is...). Went to a show with hiphop and indie acts. It was alright. Much respect to the acts but so much to the local scene. They should invest on hiring a good sound company cos it was terrible. Dropped by Club Milieu 'cos 'The Boss' had something going on there. It was my first actually. Plush and intimate. It was nice...The servers at the club were pretty much bored I guess(they were replacing ash trays tho there was only one cigarette butt on it). Walked 'a thousand miles' just to get to Eve's place. She was mentioning how near it was and we were so fucken glad that we even made it! The nonsensical debates somehow saved us from succumbing to the extreme exhaustion. We were basically scrapping thru our every last bits of vigor...'Gee' stole a bottle of Mug Root Beer which we didn't drink cos no one was feeling thirsty I suppose. He left in a flash...heh!... Aki's 'date' got cornered which was hilarious. She was basically interrogated....I had a chat with her. She seemed alright...erm...I guess? Erm...well, I had slimy curry mutton puff which I think should be causing some unpleasant chemical reactions anytime soon.

slimy mutton curry puff + soya milk + instant noodles + beer + more beer = stomach headache.

I'm feeling its symptoms already....Oh! and Radiohead 'LIVE' and on video? Brilliant!!

and Kitty...*kiss many-many*

Sunday, May 4, 2003
07:36 a.m.

blissful blasphemy

Do you remember how you were 3 or maybe 5 years ago? Negative or positive? Would you wanna be how you were? Just for a few minutes? I wished I had a chart or video of myself just so I could keep track on all the blissful and blasphemous things that I've done. The minute changes that you could never see. The ones where people would say, "Hey, you've changed." but you could never tell the difference. I tried recalling. Vague it was. Hazy it was. I remember being quiet and wouldn't comment on anything. I remember not being picky and moderately sane. I was a waste but not entirely. I was confident with the occasional hopeless-ness but not aimless. What's that you call? *sigh* Went out with Kitty Kat and her friends. We went driving, had supper, hung out. I had some beer. Mutton chop at Newton uses those crinkly fries which I don't really fancy. The wind blowing on my face was enlightening tho my hair was a mess but it's 3 in the morning and I was in the car. So...heh! Can anyone explain why work politics exist? It's making my sore ass bleed. I was humming the Duran Duran song "Come Undone" all the while at work. It fits the scenario. I think...

I'm an adult in legal terms and the only video I'd see on myself is when I'm dead and facing judgement. So where will you go today? (Play October Dagger song now...)

Thursday, May 1, 2003
05:19 a.m.

adorable

Information. Are you controlling it? Or is it controlling you? The term art makes no sense anymore to me. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Kitty Kat got a very late April's Fool joke. Somehow, I feel angry at the people who thought that it was funny but at the same time it is hilarious. I'm sorry Kitty...but hope you see it on a much lighter note. I'm angry that they made you rush to work and get all so worked up about the MSR (Monthly Store Report) but sometimes...a few comic laughs is all we ever needed to shrug off the mundane and mediocrities of this already boring devastation we call life. I love you and even better when you're angry (not at me that is!!) cos you look so damn adorable!

Wednesday, April 30, 2003
04:46 p.m.

smoked salmon

What is wrong with all the HDD that I got?!? This one now has got bad sectors already. For fuck's sake...I've been reading on 'Bad Sectors Recovery' since I woke up. I've yet to try what I've been reading on but I hope it'll work. Got work in a bit... Me and Kitty didn't had our steamboat meal lst night but Marche was sweet too. She sure love 'em Rosti and Smoked Salmon. I'd just settle with a good medium Sirloin and some salad. Maybe a 'lil Rosti here and there. No Smoked Salmon for me...It's too salty. She bought me a 12". Cinematic Orchestra's "Man With The Movie Camera". Excellent groovy beats to sit back, relax and sniff some Ethyl. Met a friend...2 in fact. Have you ever gotten the friend who scrutinizes the T-shirt or the shoes that you have on? Please tell 'em to be more discreet next time. I wouldn't buy X-Large or Supreme (maybe Bounty Hunter) but a nice regular Tee that fits me is all that I need. Bob's shop is super nice and warm. He has a small espresso machine on the side. Nice! I promised him to pass him some Starfucts Espresso Roast the next time I drop by. Maybe drop in a 1/4lb of Sumatra or Brasil for good 'ol Bob. Quality beans. Speaking of beans, Starfucts has got this new 'Commitment To Boring-ins' programs. So they claim that its their way of giving back to the farmers. I went for the presentation and trust me. These Multi-FUCKEN-Nationals sure is damn good at covering their hideous money grabbing schemes. First things first, start from the inside. Brainwash your employees and then start giving threats "Deliver! or you shall fragged!!"...and the way they handle it is so subtle that you might just fall into their Venus Fly Trap without you knowing and still be saying that it's ok. So why am I still working for them? Beats me. I'm just a wage slave. Well, gotta go rectify the bad sectors and serve some good coffee.

Tuesday, April 29, 2003
04:10 p.m.

steamboat meal

Aaaaargggggghhhhh!!! Jazzkammer (pronounced as Yazz-Karm-er) was fucking excellent!! Regurgitating noise and like Matsy would put it...Literature Thru Noise!!! It was like riding on sine waves of chaos and utter disorder. Excellent indulgence. Speaking of which. Went to Zouk for a drink fest which was initiated by a long time friend. Got fucked which was a state I was in even before reaching the final destination. I'm happy that the friend got what he wished for...Puking hard that is...Hah!... The 'Friend of Semut Biru' was doing some potato chasing which I find horrendously disgusting. 'She' found me cute, heh... but I think 'She' just disgust me. So much for the 'GLOCAL' shit. Potato's are 'yummy' but to solely chase for 'em...it's just lack of taste. I 'was' drunk and now I'm dead beat...missed my stop and had to walk from Marsiling back to Admiralty. Meeting Kitty for a steamboat meal later. I wished she could be with me but she had work. Well, It was a good night 'tho I mashed my shin on a flower pot. $6.50 well spent on a hotdog, cola and a pack of ciggies. So much for inspirations...God Bless You Fucked Generation.

Sunday, April 27, 2003
06:15 a.m.

what is the light?

Righteousness. What does it means to you? Everyone's got their notion on it. Can I claim mine too? Haven't been working for the past week, today was the first. Wasn't in the right frame of mind I guess but listening to The Flaming Lips while in the train somehow crashed that already collapsing viewpoint. What did I do to deserve. Losing the fight to survive? What other options are there? What's mine? They can't take away whatever that's mine. Preparations are never enough. Going for a jog won't make me sleep early either. Tomorrow's yours, it was never theirs.

What is the light
That you have
Shining all around you?
Is it chemically derived?

Cause if it’s natural
Something glowing from inside
Shining all around you
It’s potential has arrived

Looking into space, it surrounds you
Love is the place that you’re drawn to
Looking into space, it surrounds you
Love is the face that you’re drawn to

What is the light
That you have
Shining all around you?
Is it chemically derived?


Friday, April 25, 2003
04:17 a.m.

meetings

It's a bad day. Sort of. A bleak battle that ended well...sad enough. I didn't had much sleep and some cunt is spelling R.E.S.P.E.C.T at my face. Ok, Ok already...?!...The kid was cornered and I for once had mental block. Was it a mental block? Or was it because the battle wasn't mine? I had no say...maybe. Well, I guess I really didn't had no say. My heart goes out to the kid but sometimes, living is cruel to your soul and life itself is cruel. All sides to the stories leads to a truth. Sadly, truth is in the eye of the beholder whose eyes are blinded by reason. Reason is sadly...distorted...somehow.

Thursday, April 24, 2003
01:01 a.m.

grilled salmon chicken

*burps* Just got back from supper again. Heh! Yeah...Supper's good. *smiles* This time it's fatty rice(nasi lemak!! yay!!) at A&Z in Yishun. It's not as 'A' as a friend puts it but it's OK I guess. Worth the $3...but then again I used up $20 for the whole trip + food + cigarettes. I guess I won't be having supper for the next few days. Maybe, til the next pay day. All this in the name of a happy and full stomach.

The 'Coffee Master' program I had earlier isn't what I had in mind. Concentrated too much on the written test that I screwed up on the 'Bar' test. Fumbling on 'Standards and Procedures' but on the whole, I think I did pretty well. Scored on a couple of the stations that I had to undergo so I'm hoping it'll all go well. Was pretty amazed at myself for the things I did on the test, 'cos if it was a normal working day. I couldn't have even bothered...not a single bit. Then again, if you really just put your mind into something, you can just do almost about anything. Smack, drag, kick yourself if you have to 'cos at the end of the day...you'll see that it's all worthwhile and of course this is a habit which I should really be cultivating. Went for lunch with my girlfriend after the whole sleepless ordeal...and really....I swore the grilled salmon she had, looked like grilled chicken to me...!


Wednesday, April 23, 2003
04:18 a.m.

supper

Nothing beats anything like having your stomach full. Full of meat that is. No offence to all vegetarians but I'm on a chicken meat streak today. Skipping work never felt so good. It's like skipping school 'cept that the absence of your mum's ramblings isn't ringing your eardrums for the rest of the day. Hanging out was good. Met a colleague who'll be serving his National Service in 3 1/2hrs time. He looks like someone I know. He'll be in the same batch as that someone I know too. Hope they meet. Cos they're like a reflection. That's how I see it. Similar, 'cept that one's a 'lil shorter than the other. Similar characteristics but the other has better luck with girls than the other. *chuckles*
Both...I find hilarious, sensitive and beguiling. Lives that has effected my life, somehow....Similar lives in separate worlds.
Hung out with Matsy too...he was rambling about chicks again but he never seems to make the effort to 'Go For It!!'. Not that he doesn't, he just doesn't do it. So he claims. Hahah! My bestfriend, Matsy...hee!....He'll find the right one someday. I know he will. My prayer's will again....somehow...be heard. I hope. Had supper with my girlfriend and the colleague I mentioned and my girlfriend's bestfriend Raffy and her boyfriend. We're are pretty close I guess. The 4 of us. It's a farewell supper more of...for the colleague of mine. Had chicken cutlet!! Fabulously Yummy! Got home round 2.30am. I'm doing my studying on this Coffee Master program for work. It's sucky...I know...but I'm seeing it as a challenge even though it'll do nothing for the benefit of me 'cept for a black apron with 'Coffee Master' embroidered on it. The test will be happening the same time the newly recruited recruits will be gathering. I hope I'll make it. I hope those new recruits will make it. I have faith in them and so does my girlfriend...in me...she loves me...and I...love her so dearly. That walk to your home...Did you see the moon? So bright, so full of live and hope...
A full stomach is what makes a man happy. Somehow...

Tuesday, April 22, 2003
04:57 a.m.

Hello!

Welcome to North South! First entry and I've got nothing much to say. I feel jaded...Is it age? I need a permanent job. This whole LIFE thing is not as easy as you think it is. Well, if you still have parents giving you allowances and paying you your bills. You'd be a happy camper won't you? Oh well...promised my girlfriend that I'm going to bed...but here I am writing this. See ya around!

Monday, April 21, 2003
04:52 a.m.