Thursday, April 18, 2002
10:54 p.m. EST
wow....so tonight I was praying to God cause things have just gotten to that state of unhappiness where I wonder where things went wrong and why I'm not happy and I've been having this strange pain in my lower abdomen/bladder - I guess uterus area? - and so prayed to God to heal and get rid of whatever was wrong with it and then for the first time ever - a horrible thought popped into my head - "well if I die from whatever hurts there it'll at least end this horrible sadness I feel." For the first time I actually got so sad and depressed to the point I actually thought death would end it. Before that I could never understand how people could think of death as a way out - I guess now I understand. For my friends who read this - don't worry! I'm just in a slump right now and will be fine - I'd never EVER do *that* ok? I love myself TOO much to EVER take my life but I can understand giving IN to death (like if I was dying of a disease or something) ANYWAY - I feel better after crying and praying. Got rid of those toxins that build up. I'm gonna work on my stuff now. Talk to ya'll later.

- Nishi

Thursday, April 18, 2002
10:43 a.m.
it started with that strange sensation that feels like anxiety building up in the middle of your chest and stomach when things don't seem good......and now it's that heavy feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when things just aren't good.......life really can't stay happy and content for long can it? *sigh* I just don't feel happy :(

Thursday, April 18, 2002
01:58 a.m.
I take so many quizzes so I decided to make a page to hold the results of these personality quizzes - see All Is Me at my personal site. I wound up learning a lot about myself.

What WB drama are you?

You are so the one that people envy. You are: quirky, intelligent, fun, caring, cool, responsible, and most importantly, yourself. Who wouldn't wanna be you?!? You know how to have a good time, but you also know where to draw the line. You're known for your little oddities and being maybe a little too peppy, but frankly, you're cool with it. See, you're confident and headstrong so you're not going to be deterred by anything or anyone. Your values are very important to you!

Wednesday, April 17, 2002
10:25 p.m.
this day was so long and stressful (with the work and heat and all) I treated myself to 3 hours of television :) Friends, Dawson's Creek and Felicity. I hope Joey and Dawson get back together! And I LOVE Felicity and Ben :) I'm settling in to finish this paper and eating a yummy Yankee Doodle which I haven't had since I was a kid! (gotta love my mummy ;) she wants to fatten me up! ;)) I miss my guy....he's so busy with school and everything but I'm totally fine with that - it's just I can't help missing his voice.

- Nishi

Wednesday, April 17, 2002
06:22 p.m. EST
hee :) I got hit on 3 times today! It was so hot out today - like India-hot - only bad thing was it was humid for the first 1/2 of the day, so I dressed in my khaki capris and my pink shirt and slipped on my beige sandals and off I go!

Before I got to the law school there was some indian dude in front of the mailbox by the dorms and as I passed he said Hi so I said hi back and kept walking and then he goes "wait, don't I know you?" and I look at him him and go "nope" and he goes "don;t you go to so-and-so chuch?" and I say no I go to another one (but didn't specify which) and he said "oh wow cause I thought I met you the other night at a party or something" <-- WHAT A LINE!!!! I just laughed and said no but that it was nice meeting him. His name's Mathew - cute guy but he wouldn't stand a chance esp once he found out I went to law school - he was like "NO WAY! I thought you were a junior!" HAHA I look like I'm still 21 ;) grrrrrrreat!

So anywayz :) then I get hit on by the guy who sits next to me in my copyright class who's this sweet white guy - I asked him if he had a bandaid cause my left toe was starting to turn red from rubbing with the sandal and he was like no and I said "gawddd the price I pay for fashion" and he was all nice and "yeah but you look great" and asked if I was graduating too and how I was studying for the bar and all this other nonsense ;)

FINALLY, at the end of the day, after my last class, I walked to the bank to deposit money and on the way back - 2 freakin CLASS-LESS guys - one an indian driving a dark car and the other some latino guy driving a beat-up dirty old white car BOTH HONKED AT ME, the indian guy drove slow and stared out his right passenger window as I walked. I rolled my eyes and kept walking. It's a compliment ;) You take it and then strut off all huffy ;)

Bah - I prefer guys who look at me across a room quickly and then glance away and then glance back to let me know they're interested and then later on approach me and just talk casual and make me laugh. That's what hooks me.

Well too bad for all of them - I'm already happily in love with a very cute guy who knows exactly how to make me laugh and smile and keep me hooked ;)

Time to write that estate paper - wheee! can you feel the enthusiasm? NOT!

- Nishi

Fun Quizzes!
Wednesday, April 17, 2002
01:35 a.m.
No wonder I love dogs :)

I'm an American-pop fangirl I listen to the top 40, I want to be just like Britney Spears and maybe even date a Backstreet Boy!

What kind of fangirl are you?

Tuesday, April 16, 2002
07:28 p.m.
I had an AWESOME workout even though it was 90 degrees out! I hit the gym and jogged for an hour on the treadmill and ran 5 miles! I need new sneakers now. I'm home and spent some girly time with Nitz and Joanne :) Had my mummy's yummy food and I'm headed to shower and think I should do my nails tonight. *looks at the estate paper that must be written and turned in on Thursday* geez. Told my folks about my MPRE score results and they were very happy :) YAAY :) now they're all gung ho about me passing the bar - I reminded them that New York's Bar exam is the hardest bar exam in the nation (California being the 2nd and then Florida) but Papa was like "if so-and-so's daughter could pass, so can you" and mummy was like "if these guys who come from India barely able to speak english well can pass the Bar so can you" - thanks forthe encouragement mom and pop and the double ton of pressure to perform. SHEESH. Ok off to show and YIKES i looked at my nails - yep they REALLY need to be done. I swear I'm not superficial but a girl's nails say a lot about how well she takes care of herself!

- Nishi

Tuesday, April 16, 2002
02:14 p.m.
gawdddddddddd - it's burning hot outside! sun is blazing and it feels humid - it's near 90 degrees! Who knew NY in April would be this sunny and hot? And HAH *certain* people in L.A. are only enjoying 60's ;) For once I get the better weather - NYAH! ;) So I'm back from classes and running errands and am grabbing a quick bite to eat before heading to the post office to mail off a hurdle of packages to people who won my auctions.

I HAVE GREAT NEWS!!! I GOT A 103 ON MY MPRE EXAM I TOOK IN MARCH OF 2002!!!!!!! The passing score is an 85 so I'm very happy! Now I just gotta pass my Bar Exam this July! And on top of that - my first of my last law school finals is on 4/29 - Copyright Law - the pressure is starting to build with my exams and 3 papers *SIGH*

Ok I gotta finish packaging things and eating and change into something light cause I wanna work out after I mail the packages! I need to lose 15 pounds and get down to 90 so I can wear skimpy lil outfits this summer ;) (again 90 is my normal weight cause I'm so short - 4ft 8 - but I don't *look* short mind you!) ;)

- Nishi

Monday, April 15, 2002
06:25 p.m.
6:30 and it is STILL a HOT beautiful day outside! WHEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE SUMMER!!! :D I made a Kamikaze Kaitou (KAITO) Jeanne Shrine called REVOLUTION and made a fan club for Chiaki and Maron and Jeanne and Sindbad! :) GO SEEE: http://www.usagiandmamoru.com/jeanne - in addition - USAGIANDMAMORU.COM HIT 1 MILLION HITS TODAY!!!!! :D More good news - because that horrible ebay seller who I won a Neo Queen Serenity fan art never mailed me my art - the original artist, Chelsea Forbus, is going to draw me the IMAGE ABOVE ON THIS PAGE of SERENITY (the one I use in this layout for this journal!!!!)!!!!! :D

Join the Kamikaze Jeanne Mailing List devoted to Chiaki/Maron and Sindbad/Jeanne!

Sunday, April 14, 2002
07:18 p.m.
Instead of working hard this weekend, I spent it writing songs and poems and filled my Sailor Moon 10th Anniversary special notebook with them. Then I go and take this quiz and find out I'm the Goddess of Poetry! hahaha :) It's kinda true though - I was always the English teacher's pet in high school and my favorite, Ms. Evans, put me in honors studies because of my love for writing when I showed her my first 4 chapters to Legend of the Immortals. I don't write stories anymore though and instead, vent through songs and poems and my web designing and making pages which reflect what I'm feeling or going through.

I Am Fachea Celtic Goddess of Poetry. What Celtic Goddess are You? Quiz by Aoibhell You yourself love all things beautiful and earthy, and writing poetry is your passion, although you might divulge in a good story once in a while. You have always been the English teacher's favourite and are generally a very artistic person.

Sunday, April 14, 2002
05:36 p.m.
hola folks! :) What a bad girl I've been this weekend - barely got any work done and only did research for 1 of my papers. I'm screwed. Ah well - my folks came today to drop of food and money :D Just $40 but that's enough :) It was SO gorgeous this weekend during the day - warm and sunny and soon as 5pm hits - it's bleak and grey and yucky. I WANT MY SUMMER. Ricky's out driving on the CA highway enjoying the sun - SOOOOOO not fair!

I took another quiz! Thanks Rebecca and Kris-chan!! :)

Majesty is a true leader in every sense of the word. She's intelligent, confident and sophisticated. She's comfortable in a variety of social circles and, although she never steals the limelight, she rarely wants for attention. At heart she's a diplomat and tactician, adept at delegation. A real classy lady!

Saturday, April 13, 2002
04:16 p.m.

I Miss You
Incubus
To see you when I wake up
is a gift I didn't think could be real.
To know that you feel the same as I do
is a three-fold, utopian dream.
You do something to me that I can't explain.
So would I be out of line if I said,
I miss you.(?)

I see your picture, I smell your skin on the empty pillow next to mine.
You have only been gone ten days, but already I'm wasting away.
I know I'll see you again
whether far or soon.
But I need you to know that I care
and I miss you.

Friday, April 12, 2002
10:44 p.m.
WAI! I'm so excited!! TOKYPOP is going to publish KARE KANO IN ENGLISH!!!!! I've been buying Kodocha and Marmalade Boy in english manga from them so far by issues and now am going to buy the graphic novels! Kare Kano is coming out as a graphic novel April 30th! See http://www.tokyopop.com :)

I wish TOKYPOP would become like Ribon or Nakayoshi or other Japanese manga magazines in that it could be delivered to our homes and goodies could be offered and given free inside. I don't think we have anything equivalent to something like those manga mags!

I'm addicted to the song 'Happiness Is" by THE VERVE PIPE. Such a cool song! :) But when amn't I addicted to music or something? ;) (and yes I know amn't isn't a word ;))

- Nishi

Listening to Music on my Friday night off
Friday, April 12, 2002
08:57 p.m.
No One
by Athenaeum

You're telling me things
I already know
You take me places
I never would go
And you act so freely
Like the world was your own
You can do anything you want
But don't leave me alone

And no one feels
And no one feels like we do

When will we learn
That nothing is real
And everything's changing
Except what we feel
And out on your doorstep I was all butterflies
Cause all of the moonlight in the sky
Was no match for your eyes

And no one feels
And no one feels like we do

You're telling me things
I don't want to hear
But you are my answer
When nothing is clear
And the music played softly
As you whispered a word
I had to sigh and catch my breath
From what I had heard

And no one feels
And no one feels like we do

Friday, April 12, 2002
05:23 p.m.
TGIF!!!!!!! :) Thank God it's Friday! I need some rest after a long week of classes and presentations! My Jew Law presentation went great! Am very happy about that! :) I love Jewish weddings now and writing a paper on marriage under Jewish law was SO enlightening and I loved getting back into the Bible. Everything is so religiously and historically connected in a Jewish wedding - from remembrance of the destruction of the Jewish temple to God's divine plan for man and woman's equality. It's beautiful. I'm not overly religious but I do believe in what's stated in the Bible and am a strong believer of God.

ANYWAYZ :) It's a rainy Friday here and it's really very pretty. The rain is falling softly outside and all looks so peaceful and calm. It feels nice. Perfect weather after such a hectic week. See Aisha? I DO like the rain - really! :) Just not all the time since it rains or snows or just isn't as sunny and warm enough in this part of the world. ;)

Thanks for the quize Rebecca!

Take the 100 Acre Personality Quiz! hahaha! Maybe that IS true ;) All I *really* need in life is good friends, good love, good food, and to have fun in life. However the slow part - HAH - ok maybe I'm a lil slow.... hehe :D *cheesy grin*

Another all nighter
Thursday, April 11, 2002
12:40 a.m.
yes - a week later and I'm again pulling all-nights. Dammit I hate end of the semester-craze - and it's worse when ur graduating! I'm up working on my Jewish Law presentation and on Estate Tax.

I made pretty chat area pages for UsagiandMamoru.com! :) Check out the new chats at: http://www.usagiandmamoru.com/chat :) All of my auctions sold! YAAY! I wound up making $60! And it's all going to my credit card debt - woo hoo! I'm very sad though about the Usagi Pyjama (Pajama) Plush doll :( I won it back in February and the seller on Yahoo P. (Pam) Derick - kept saying she'd mailed ir or WOULD mail it but it's now April 10th and nothing ever came! Finally i told her I felt I was being taken advantage of and wanted the doll or a refund. She said I'd get a refund. I told her if she gave me the refund I wouldn't leave neg feedback. :( I feel so sad now :( I wanted that plush so much and won it fair and square and the seller turned out to be an irresponsible and horriblse seller.

Anywayz *HUGS* to everyone. AISHAAAAAA!!!! Thanks :) I definitely feel thankful for being "smiles" again! :) We both deserve it!

- Nishi

Tuesday, April 9, 2002
4:22 p.m. EST
LONGGGGGGGGGGG day! I think the cold is finally gone! I slept horribly last night - kept thinking my barbie princess dolls were going to turn their heads and smile evilly at me! Those damn dolls can be quite scary at night. I miss ricky :( my room and bed feels empty everytime he leaves after a visit.......anyway.....Nitz and I just ordered chinese food! Boneless Spare Ribs and pork fried rice and coke and steamed dumplings although my fave appetizer is crab rangoon! :)

Tuesday, April 9, 2002
12:13 a.m.
Wanted to show you guys some new things I won! First is this 1997 Sailor Moon Calendar with rare Manga images! The next is this Kamikaze Kaitou Jeanne Doll! It's beautiful! I got a whole SLEW of FUSHIGI YUUGI MANGA AND ANIME POSTERS which are too many to show here. And lastly, I got a gorgeous poster set of Usagi and Mamoru posters.

happy happy, lucky lucky, monkey monkey! :) I love Sana-chan!
Monday, April 8, 2002
05:28 p.m.
ok forget everything in the entry below - in fact, I should delete it cause you know why? Ricky surprised visited me on Friday night! It was the best surprise of my LIFE!

There I was feeling all sad and stuff and cranking out that stupid darn paper which I FINALLY finished around 10pm mind you ;) WHEN I got this knock on my door. Turned out to be my friend Hyder and he said he got locked out of his room and needed to use my phone to call his suitemate. When I let Hyder show himself out I went back to my room and when I came back out I saw both Ricky and Hyder there!!! I thought I was hallucinating!

Turned out rick had been hiding in the bathroom while Hyder and I talked (Hyder had let him in while I was getting the phone) HAHAH Rick wanted to totally surprise me cause I had no idea he was planning to come at all! We had a WONDERFUL weekend and I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOO Happy! Him coming here was the best thing! :) I even got him to watch Kodocha and he liked it!!! He likes anime! Well at least 2-4 episodes of 1 series ;)

I just got back from dropping him at the airport and I went to Kinokuniya and picked up my April Ribon 2002 and it came with cool furoku! Gorgeous bracelet and notebook! My Sailor Moon 10th Anniversary notebook came too as did new Kodocha and Marmalade Boy manga from Tokyo Pop! :)

Only bad thing is I didn't get ANY work done this weekend! :) hahaha that's ok cause I had a lot of fun and it was worth it! :) I'm off to study now. :)

- Nishi

Thursday, April 4, 2002
03:30 p.m. EST

WAI!! A wonderful seller on ebay named meewchan was selling a lot of 7 mini 10x13 doublie-sided mini-posters and this was one of them - all for $5. But I only wanted this one so meewchan accepted my offer to buy it for $5 AND included free shipping! How awesome is that? *huggles my posters* They make me so happy when everything else in life sucks.

I pulled an allnighter but chickened out at 7am this morning and went to bed to wake up at 11. I've been working on my paper and am up to page 17 but am having a hard time making it 25. *sigh* I need to email it out to the Prof. and rest of class by midnight I think. GUESS WHAT!!!!!! I got my 1st A in law school!!!! I called up Ricky and my parents all excited about it! hahaha when rick gets the message he'll laugh or shake his head ;) Turns out the 30pg paper I slaved away on for Judge Radigan's Estate Administration class last semester earned me a 24/25! I now have an A on my transcript! YAAAAAAY!!!!!!! My grades in law school have been pretty avg in the B/C area - with the B- curve my school clung to, it was hard to get a B let alone an A! Finally, this year, they dropped the B- curve and instituted a B curve like everyone else. (I think anyway). I haven't gotten any flaming rants or raves from any AnCml member yet - maybe by tonight - funny how I'm expecting it huh? It would be nice if they'd just reinstate that member and just handle everything well but who knows how it will turn out. Ah well - this paper calls. Must finish by midnight. Ciao folks! Oh yeah - Aisha wrote me! And Aish, what you have in your journal is great! "sometimes, exuding the loudest laughters is just another way to conceal your inner sorrows." <-- how true! Can't tell you how many times I've smiled and laughed though inside I was crying and bleeding. *big hug* I'm so happy I met you! - Nishi UPDATE: I've been banned from the AnCml! Woo hoo! Looks like they really CAN'T take any kind of response. whatever.

Thursday, April 4, 2002
01:00 a.m.

Current Music: Mono - Life In Mono/Ingenue - from Great Expectations Soundtrack God I LOVE this song! It makes me feel like my life is just beginning its adventure. Rebecca of MoonPrincess.com and Caroline of MoonandMask.com are going to both help in the Academic Aid Fund!! I took action and emailed my updates list and am going to start an Academic Aid fund asking for min. $1 contributions from visitors - I'm hoping to give one needy college/grad student anywhere from $100 - $1000. The full page for this fund will be up in 2 weeks. In other news, I think I've involved myself in a little scuffle on the Ayashi no Ceres Mailing List. I think one member was openly abused by being yelled at and banned for responding upset to an inappropriate April Fool's Day joke sent to the list. I wound up emailing the group tonight after I saw the admin/moderator's outright banning of that member and the frivolous reasons for it. If I'm banned for posting - I'll take the list down to hell for intolerance. This lovely image on the right is a manga poster from Kamikaze Kaitou Jeanne I won on ebay for $2.99 + $5 shipping. - Nishi

Wednesday, April 3, 2002
03:28 p.m.
ya know what sucks? showing up for class or negotiations and finding out there is none. I woke up earlier than I would've in order to go to a 10:30 meeting to prepare with group members for 11am negotiations only to find out at 11:05 there was none. I wound up having to go back home and shower and change - which was good cause it was a blazing beautiful day - sun out and everybody in tee's! Went to my 1pm class and left at the mid=break to get my eyebrows done - I had limited cash and had planned on only tipping $1 and the woman who does my eyebrows made a stink over it (it costs 7.40 and I only gave her $1 tip - I felt bad but I had to save the rest for money orders and mailing out packages. Now I feel terrible! I promised her more next time.

Suddenly at 2:45 - when I came out of Genovese with packaging materials - it started RAINING. The whole beautiful day disappeared. I went back to school thinking I had my 3pm class but it was for nothing - class had been cancelled! Now I'm home and I feel slightly ticked off. I still have to run errands. Might as well do it now but I'm worried about rain! I can't believe what started out as a gorgeous day has, by 3pm, turned into a bleak, grey miserable mess! UGH - I don't like NY :(

- Nishi

Tuesday, April 2, 2002
11:12 p.m.
sometimes I feel so shamed and humbled. How many of you are blessed with privileges and an almost worry-free existence as far as money, food, clothing, and shelter are concerned? There are people just like you and me who are going to college, law school, or just working and have to fend for themselves. They don't have financially secure parents to always help them out - they don't have that kind of security blanket at all.

Makes me so humble when I think how lucky I am....my parents take care of my housing at law school, took care of everything throughout college and only when I started law school did my dad say I had to take loans out to meet as much of my tuition as I could. He still pays a balance of about $3-$4,000 a semester (not including the other $3000 for housing) and why? Cause he and my mom just want me to focus on my studies and worry about money after the studies are over. So many people though, just like me, don't have it that lucky. They gotta put themselves through school and worry about money every day.

I have so much respect for people who have to work harder than I ever did in order to get the same education and lifestyle I live. I don't want to be just a talker though....I wanna DO something....maybe I should start a scholarship fund through UsagiandMamoru.com - just something little to start off with - or maybe just an academic award each year of maybe $500 or $1000 or more depending on how much people can donate each year.

I'd need to talk to Sarah Beth about this as she's my treasurer. I really want to do something to help....

- Nishi

Tuesday, April 2, 2002
11:41 a.m.
I swear I tried to pull an allnighter but I just couldn't. Went to bed around 3:30am ;) Rick I can't believe you stayed up all night - I just wasn't as motivated last night as you - I had my "thursday" way out. Class at 12 - estate tax, gotta run before I'm late and I didn't have anything to eat. Dangitall! *HUGS* to everyone and more later.

- Nishi

Monday, April 1, 2002
9:22 p.m. EST
*big stretch* nyah! hehe :) this research is taking FOREVER! I am seriously gonna be pulling an allnighter after all! himeko-chan I got your email! Sorry I've been so slow replying but I had a lot on my plate the past couple weeks! Himeko is SO nice - she told me I'm a ray of sunshine in people's dark lives and to never forget how special I am. Thank you so much *HUG* You don't know how much that means to me!

I took a few new pics today just because - they came out semi-ok but the lighting was awful so last 2 pics are pretty dark on my comp but I know on larger resolutions they prolly look fine.

Monday, April 1, 2002
12:48 p.m.
I'm back at school! Just saw my mom and sisters off :) The weather is awesome outside - it's one of those fabulous, sunny spring days! Wish I didn't have to spend it writing a paper! I'm still sick :( My throat is hurting like heck and all I have is tylenol but that's not strong enough - I need 2 tylenols where I only need 1 advil. My ricky, you can always take care of me :) *MWAH* Ok time to get all my finances in order and then buckle down and work. Good luck Aisha with your work too *HUGS*

- Nishi

P.S. I just read Naoko Takeuchi's new manga LOVE WITCH - translations available from Alex Glover The Manga of Takeuchi Naoko. If anyone loves Naoko Takeuchi and her manga works - join the Naoko Takeuchi Mailing List :)

Sunday, March 31, 2002
07:15 p.m.
well it's official - my mom and I somehow got sore throats. Yippee kay yi yay. And I have to go back tomorrow and write this damn paper. Crap. It hurts...I'm such a baby...my face is all hot. As if I wasn't already going through hard stuff now I'm sick. Dangitall!

Quick hi to Rebecca, Sei and Aisha and Sarah and Sarah Beth and Lydia.

- Nishi

Sunday, March 31, 2002
05:49 p.m.
Happy Easter everyone! I've been up since 4:30am and I think I AM coming down with a sore throat. I was so not into the church qurbana or anything - I was closing my eyes trying to fall asleep standing up ;) haha! After church, one of my favorite oldest cousins Juny Chati (that's just a family name - his real name is Mat) surprised my family and I by visiting us in church! I had a little time to catch up with him and it was nice :) I hope he and I can meet up and really catch up.

Mummy made lots of duck/chicken curry and lamb and salmon and thosha. After getting home around 12:30 I hit the bed and slept till 3:30. Lord was I tired ;) Nithi left to go back to college today and these darn ladybugs are flying all over the light above the computer table here downstairs! UGH! I hate bugs!

Even though it's Easter, it's really important to remember that tragic things are happening every day. Last night one of my friend's friends got into a horrible accident, and one of the passengers died. How can these horrible things happen just like that? :( I said a prayer.

As for me....ah well....I'm me :) be back at school tomorrow with lots to do. Need to go to Kinokuniya and pick up the latest Ribon with my favorite Max Lovely in it! When is someone going to translate this already?? See ya later everyone.

- Nishi