Well, since people did ask me about my opinion, here it is:

Tragic day, of course, but not as tragic for me as it is for others. I am sorry if this offends you, but I am not an American, and I tend to strongly disagree with past and current American politics. I do not like Bush. I do not like anyone who off-handedly mentions war. I cannot understand people who second an attack on another country because this country might do something. That's like saying I'll kill all my friends now because tomorrow, they might step on my toes.

And that is all I will say to that. I have a lot of American friends, and I've gotten bad reactions once to something I posted. To each their own opinion, I know, but I have mine, and I don't need to post it anywhere or defend it. What happened to the people at the WTC was tragic, but death happens every day, and often in much worse ways than this.

Gawd, people, let the past rest. It happened. It's over. It won't change. This is just making noise no one wants or needs. Yeah, I'm talking about you. As far as I know, Drew's blog is linked to no other than mine. So whoever found her blog, unless they accidently happened to find it by hopping around, went through mine to get to hers. And you sending around parts of what she wrote to others just proves to me what kind of a pathetic lowlife you are. Are you that desperate for attention that you need someone else's misery to put the spotlight on you? Well, here's a hint: try jumping from the roof of your house. It sure will get you a lot of attention. Most people involved in this have stated they want it over and be done with. So let it be done with, and crawl back into the hole you came from.

Done for tonight.

For those interested, I am now a member of the LJ community, and yes, I even have my own account. I don't know how frequently I'll be updating this thing, or for what I'll use it...but whoever feels the need to comment on something I wrote here at Nachtfalter, feel free to do so. Death threats, chocolates, flames, whatever. I always appreciate the things other minds can come up with. Entertain me.

"Unplugged the phone. Switched off cell phone. Unhooked the door bell from the house current. Try and get a hold of me during the next four days and DIE. I'm not here."

That about sums up what I told Abbritti this morning. Only I think that I was less friendly than what I wrote above. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

The rooms are empty now. Coming home isn't what it used to be anymore with Ti gone. I know I said I wouldn't moan about it, but eh, when do I ever do what I say? The freaking ironic thing is that that this night, Abbritti told me that the worst seems to be over. I'm now down to 21 days of work in September, and no double shifts...for now. It makes me sick to think about it. I've curbed myself down to nothing to get through this thing with a sane mind, and now they're cutting me slack. What is this, some kind of fucking test? See how far they can go before I explode? I'm frighteningly calm, though. I haven't felt this calm in months. Leaving aside the fact that my apartment is in shambles because I didn't have the time to clean anything, I don't really mind. By that, I mean anything. It's not the calm before the storm kind of calm, it's more the tapping my fingers on the tabletop and smiling at everything kind of calm. Weird feeling, but it'll pass I guess.

Mel! Lex told me you got the job at 7-11. Congrats! And you better tell those customers there to behave themselves, otherwise they'll have one armed to the teeth, pissed off German to deal with. *snickers* Delusional thinking, but it's the thought that counts, ne? I miss you, you, you and you. < sap>Wuvvies.< /sap>

Just came back from work. Bleh day to the fullest extent. Looking at the clock makes me realize that in seven hours, I have to go back to work. Work, work, work...that's all that is on my mind lately. I'm becoming one of those people that moan about something they are damn well able to change.

I wonder if it's a bad thing if, when I listen to a song sung by the Corrs, I hear the woman singing "Where fuckos build their nests", while she is really singing "Where cuckoos build their nests". Sublimal subconscious reversed lightbeams versus the Freudian-influenced sexless boy and all that crap. *glanes at Mei* Was that cryptic enough?

To sum up my last few days (weeks, months) in a few non-cryptic words, THEY SUCKED MONKEY DICKS. And for all the faecallically challenged dorks out there: you can kiss my pucker. No wait, ew. Lemme rephrase that. Póg mó thón! That's Irish-Gaelic for "kiss my ass", by the way. <.< Not that anyone really ever wanted that information, but eh. Although I think I'm becoming used to the lack of sleep, what I cannot get used to is the rather obvious lack of life. I know I've bemoaned the fact before, and yeah, I should be glad I have a job, but what's the use of money if I can't spend it due to a severe lack of time. Maybe I should've drawn the line at Ti. Update on the cat: Ti's for now, maybe forever, a constant resident at Dree's place. I don't know what's more heartwrenching, giving away a cat you love because she's becoming a nuisance, or giving her away because her becoming a nuisance breaks your heart. Well, that didn't come out right. It was a choice between losing the job and try to get a different one or giving Ti away because otherwise I'd be neglecting her. I chose. *sighs* Anyway. It wasn't meant to last, nothing new there, and you won't hear me moan about it if I can help it. End of story.

And that about sums up my current life. Rather trite, I know, but that's all there is. I'm afraid the time of adventures is over, and good old everyday crap is catching up to me. And that's nothing new, either, I knew it'd happen one day, and one way or other it is okay, like so many things are. 2001 changed everything, it changed me. 2002 seems to try and change what remained of my life around me. I don't really know if the road I've chosen is what I really want to be or be at, that yet remains to be seen. For now, though, I'm dreadfully tired, and dreadfully sick of myself drifting off into those poetry-overloaded bouts of wordiness and empty phrases.

BB, I miss all of you, more than I'll ever be able to express, but there's nothing I can do now. The road is chosen. To bed I must. Trying to tell you when I'll next be online is trying to change the direction of a ton of bricks in mid-drop. I know it looks as though I do have the time, since I'm blogging more or less regularly, but that's just because I'm squeezing words out of my head ten minutes before I go to bed. The results are what you see above and below. Somewhere in the middle, I'm trying to claw my way back into what's left of what passes for life for me. I can't even ask you to wait for me anymore. I'd just be holding things up. Gomen ne, and good night.

Down there in the cellar you put your hand on my back, and that, my dear, already says it all. I wake up in your dawn to a breaking sky and mistake the ceiling for a spider's web. I look at myself in the mirror and I know I will laugh now; there is nothing else to do. Sometimes the easiest things are the hardest. They stay with us the longest. Forever may not be long enough. A car driving along a section of the autobahn reverses in time and crashes against its own shadow; I'm laughing. There is nothing else I can do.

X_x I don't think I've ever had as much trouble with a layout as with this one. CSS be damned.