Pitas.com!

I'm saving all
I'm not giving
But it's overflowing,
evaporating in the air

As i'm walking,
I know I'm not breathing,
I'm not breathing only air
It's filled with words
once spoken
by people everywhere

And I can hear all the whispers
that have lived a thousand years
It just took me being open
for them to reach my eager ears

Now they've reached my eager ears
And i hope I'll be ready
when my light,
when my life divides

"A thousand years" - Azure Ray

Partners in Crime

Aini

Farttt

Maiii

Ommm

Sharmmm

Shazzz

Shrekkk

Yannn

imakemusicyoumakemesick

TidBitzz

Side Reality

The Drunken Boat

theOniOn

w|red

AltPress.com

time capsule

"End the love affair with the future and have a one night stand with the present...will you?"

Thursday, June 17, 2004 11:59 p.m.

hello there....the angel from my nightmare...

boooyaa..today was bumming day...i like bumming day..until i get bored that is...

so yesterday had my 2nd driving lesson this week after awhile..ah chong, my driving instructor said hey why dont we put a bet on ur next test...u know like why dont u bet 500 bux that u pass...and im like..fuck no...well not my exact words..but ya..hell no..i dont have 500 bux..so he said..ok 100 la..and im like...nahh..i dont wanna lose that kinda money..wahah..and besides i dont bet...and i'm like..so why do u wanna bet bet..he said he did it with another student and he paid 500 bux to the student who passed his test...haha..he's prolly shooting a loada crap..but seriously..betting's not gonna encourage me...so he told me to go to the doctor..huh? wahaha...coz the doc will be able to give me these pills that will make me less nervous..there've been students who did it before and there's a doc he can recommend..ahh..that sounds more practical..i think i just might do that...coz i dunno why..i just go kamikaze with the tester sitting beside me..ah chong said..its not like i can't drive, i just melt when the tester's around...not that testers are drop dead gorgeous kinda "melt"...its just having someone wearing this uniform that labels him 'very important' with a clipboard scribbling god-knows-what while you're trying not to hit the kerb..its hard to not think about what he's thinking...i mean...im calm for exams..its just me and me against the paper..but this..its me and the car against a wicked stepfather...i can't focus three-way..wahahah..ok i dont mean to scare those wanting to learn driving...im just chicken...sometimes.

bought the lp tix after driving yesterday...yeeeha..finally a tangible semblance of confirmation that i'll be lettin my hair down on tuesday...me and shrek..we'll strip the padang off its grass(es?)...

..and forget bout him...he's prolly goin with his "Gal"...i hate that word "gal"..like *gag*..like..ugh..ok la maybe i was naive...or stupid..not bitter..because it would be stupid to be bitter..so i guess i'm not stupid..heh..what the hell am i talkin about?!..ah well..for my info..it was prolly a case of pre-mature emotions clouding my judgements..baad azira..bad bad azzzz..*slaps wrist*..o well...everybody's gotta learn sometime.

Monday, June 14, 2004 09:18 p.m.

blessed are the forgetful, for they get the better even of their blunders.

watched 2 movies in 2 days..wooo..

eternal sunshine was not a disappointment..warped but not as warped as 'being john malkovich'.....charlie kaufman is the psychological of quentin tarantino's visual..if u know what i mean..if you don't then just pretend to for my sake...muahah..i have to rent 'adaptation'

harry potter was draggy but enjoyable...i admit i'm not a fan (maybe coz i havent read the book and all (so sue me!)) but i wanted to watch it for the "weeeee element"...you know..like..weeeeeee this is fun!(and a lil spooky)..for pure escapism to another world.. (so yea it didnt disappoint much...)

o ya my climbing mountain experience..later la...too lazy to be in story-telling mood

bye yannn...wish you a safe trip and to finding inner peace..muahah..no..seriously.

Saturday, June 12, 2004 05:32 p.m.

9 days are not enough...heck 9 years would not be enough!

Ok im more or less getting my sleep pattern back to normal….now on to the story-telling..where do I freakin start…I kept a journal while I was there…I found writing a travel journal was the greatest souvenir while I was in Vietnam…so hopefully I’ll be disciplined enough to keep writing…and blessed enough to keep traveling…

In a nutshell, what I really really enjoyed on my 9 day trip to egypt:

- being awed by awesome-ness of the pyramids (crawled inside but nothing much there, mummies were moved to the museum)
- being awed by the awesomeness of the sphinx
- reaching the peak of mt Sinai
- watching the sunrise from the peak of mt Sinai
- picking seashells on the beach by the red sea
- standing on a spot which separates Asia and Africa at the Suez canal
- having the constant view of the Mediterranean beach on the bus ride in Alexandria

- street kebabs (cheap and delishh)
- cheese(!) for every meal
- arab music (I fell in love with the richly melodic fluctuating voice and hypnotizing beats of arab music)
- watching arab mtv in the hotel room (which also had Britney spears and eminem and usher…weeeee)
- watching arab HBO with English movies

- bargaining at the bazaar (although it sux coz we were only given an hour and a half to shop there)
- cute Egyptian men (I enjoyed the sight of them only..muahah)
- the river Nile cruise
- the performances on the river Nile cruise – belly dancing, singing and this guy who just doesn’t stop spinning while balancing stuff on his head
- the food for the first few days (coz they just served the saaaame stuff at every restaurant after that, it got to the point of feeling pukey…and there were no chilli sauce!)
- smoking sheesha (not! Muahah…I’d love to try it but it’d be frowned upon by the men unless we bought our own sheesha thingy but my mom wasn’t cool with it..)
- the police escort and bodyguard at fayoum which made me feel like a supastar
- the in-flight entertainment and extra seats for me to lie on on the pleasant flight home
- Dramamines …which made the long flights and long bus rides tolerable…otherwise, “pukey” would be my middle name.
- Learning so much history and being able to be near it and touch it.
- Just being blown away and awed altogether by the country, the architectures, the culture, the history and everything else.

What I Didn’t enjoy:

- the mosquitoes in the hotel in Sinai (beautiful view of the mountains and desert but the mosquitoes!)
- rude arab stewardesses
- being stared at in mosques for not covering my head
- the disorganized way of purchasing food in shops in the city (you have to tell the cashier what you want first, pay for it, then go somewhere else and get it..even for ice-creams!)
- very very crowded city
- shopping in the city/ language barriers – it’s like earthling speaking to an alien as my mom bargains with the salesgirl with a pen and a notepad)
- The scorching heat in cairo city (even the desert was not as scorching with the occasional very cool breeze)
- The incident of the drum that’s made of clay that we bought for very cheap which fell and broke when the bus hits a bump. Grrr..
- The repetitive “variety” of food in every different restaurants
- Brinjals(!) in their lasagnas and pizzas..yuck

So ya…that’s in a nutshell…and my trip was more or less in a nutshell...there's just soooo much to see and learn really..we joked about how the egyptian students probably had to learn their country's history every year of their school life..whereas in singapore..its just stamford raffles, japanese occupation, racial riots, PAP..thats bout it..hahah..boriiiing…so ya...i’ll tell ya the story of my first ever mountain hike/climb later…that’s all for now!

Thursday, June 10, 2004 11:35 p.m.

i'm baaaaaack

weeeeeeee...hmmm..where do i start...i'll just say it was a helluvan experience...i brought home an egyptian tan..muahah..and a lil food poisoning..

i need sleep and poh chye right now.

later!

Tuesday, June 1, 2004 08:01 p.m.

i'll be back with camel burger patties and a piece of brick from the pyramids..wait up!

yeeeha. i've packed...surprisingly i didn't take very long to pack..maybe coz i was busy with the subject registrations..i got what i wanted..almost.you can never ask for too much but i will try..the modules are not as dry as last semester's so thats a yay! imma be a sophomore when school re-opens..i hope its only a coincidence that the word "sophomore" sounds like "suffer more"..heh. even if its a pun i don't wanna play with it.

so my flight to cairo leaves at 5am tomorrow morning..9 hours with 3 hours transit at bahrain...omigosh..9 hours..thats like..the length of 4 movies..i hope my motion sickness pills have good stamina..but hopefully i'll be sleeping most of it la. so ya. good luck to all those auditioning for singapore idol. happy b'day in advance mai(!!). be nice everybody. i'll be back on the 10th. bye. miss me.

Saturday, May 29, 2004 08:31 p.m.

the shape of a glass

steve said the shape of a wine glass determines the taste of the wine...he doesn't like our new takeaway cups coz according to him the angle of the cover of the cup where you drink from is now different..so the drink now tastes different...ahah..ummmmm. ok steve-o, anything you say..

ok i've stopped grinning...it's too tiring and somewhere in the middle of it you feel stupid you're the only one.heh.but i'll prolly still be smiling inside until im given a reason not to..(i'm talking to myself here really..muahah..for my own personal memory keepsakes)

3 more days baybeeee

Friday, May 28, 2004 10:51 p.m.

turn.hiatus.look.

I can't stop grinning...I'm not telling why...
yet.

Friday, May 28, 2004 01:05 a.m.

misunderstood!

so thaaaaaaaaats the reason...I may have been a lil hurt if u'd confronted me..but it sure would've saved us both those cold shoulders..I had no idea you had these misconceptions bout me..and I'm not like that..really..I'm not the nicest person but I'm nicer than what you think I am..really...muahah...but you know what I don't have to prove anything to you..and to think I had to find out from someone else...someone whom I think talks too much..but now I dont really mind..hehah...ur lucky I have a sense of humor...I think.
its cool la. the situation has cooled down by itself through time...coz I just grin and bear it(yay for me)...as much as I hate how time chases us, I appreciate how it levels "extremities" sometimes...gah ..................................................

anyway..woteva..just needed a channel to rant. let see...I need some positive vibes...ahh...christopher miller...i'm in love with christopher miller..we chatted..he said he cooks..and his favourite type of food is indian food..a caucasian who likes spice..oooh la la..he orders a medium mocachinno take away every weekday during his coffee break...marry me christopher miller. muahahah...but u know its too bad i'm not the only one who wants to marry him...we're in a lil "the bachelor" tv show situation...he chats up anyone of us who chats him up..grrr..catfight! aarrrrrrrrrr! ....i hope i serve him tomorrow..haaaaaa....that'd give me a heads up with the competition and prolly a rose at the end of the day..muahah..ok too much reality tv for me...anyway...wooooo...fantasia...yay!

***edited to say that the guy's name is not christopher miller...hahah..its steve something...yea i know..for girls deperate to get his attention, we didn't do our research well...which prolly explains why i got a D for my research module..but lets not go there..ahah.

Tuesday, May 25, 2004 11:21 p.m.

shrek it out

puss in boots! puss in boots! ahahah...finally! a respectable role for a cat in a movie! u know how most times cats in movies are usually portrayed as mean and scary and villainous..just name me a movie bout animals and the cat plays a bad guy i tell you...so ya..u should watch shrek 2 for this musketeer cat...hes adorably gung-ho funny...and yea shrek 2 is laugh out loud funny..didnt really catch shrek 1 but this one's still funnyy..parody of all fairy tales..pinocchio's preference of underwear not spared...so ya..watch it..for funny fun.

results out today...ummm...u could say its less than average..ah...screw it. 'tis enough.

Monday, May 24, 2004 12:29 a.m.

if god is a DJ, life is a dance floor, love is the rhythm, you are the.........

my favorite mode of escapism is music....

escapism...I first learnt that word in sec 4..(I know..I don't have a very very extensive vocabulary at 16)...my maths teacher asked me one on one after I flunked really really really badly for an A maths test...she was like, "why? is it escapism?"..I stared at her wide-eyed and wondering and was like.."huh?"..running through a list of vocabulary in my head.."escape - to run away from, to be free from..escapist - person who runs away..escapism - ????"..so I replied convincingly "Nooooo...escapism?! me??" shaking my head like I truly madly deeply know the meaning of escapism when honestly, I have nooo idea...then of course I explained the real reason of flunking the test..I said something about how maths frustrates me to pieces...when I can't get the right answers..or can't even proceed to solve the equation fully..it makes me tear my hair out and it literally makes me cry..and sometimes I crumple the papers in anger..yea..me and maths dont get along..big no-no...so then she sympathized and said that she knows how it feels..(I don't think she does...for a person teaching maths..she must really love it..but I don't doubt her kindness and sincerity in trying to see my point of view)...so ya...so much about the word "escapism"...so now..I don't even think my maths teacher used the word correctly then..but you know...she teaches maths..not literature..she must really tear her hair out and cry and tear the dictionary to pieces when she can't find the right word....huur huur

--------------------------------------------------------

I can't wait for my vacation. I'm gonna get a new pair of sunglasses and flip flops aaaand maybe some sun screen..I hope the weather's not too hot..altho I hear its cooler at night..yay..I've had enough of hot here. counting down. 8 more days to escapism. weeeeee

Friday, May 21, 2004 11:11 p.m.

I can't hear without my glasses

ohoho..there's a "new generation" of people in the workplace..woopeee..change..I don't mind at all.

..linkin park at the padang..about.time.

thanx for the chewing gum..can I have some more?

Thursday, May 20, 2004 11:07 p.m.

The numbers along the second hands me a minute

numbers cannot measure the blessings that I have..so..what's one wish unfulfilled, right? ah huh.

thanx for keeping my heart and mind in the right place

thanx for all the wonderful people in my life

thanx for the all the luxuries I often take for granted

thanx for keeping my feet to the ground where it belongs

thanx for making me strong enough to squeeze through dilemmas

.................................

xander: "oooh poetry...a sign of pretentious inner turmoil..."
me: "nahh..no turmoil. no poetry. just. pretentious expression of. clarity."

.................................

And on soaked concrete ground
Above the after-storm
The air of life collides
Into my breath today

Sometimes I need to hear
Myself breathe in hard
To thank surroundings kind enough,
That grip my existence

If I were to measure time…

- Of days passing by the colored sky
how hours slither by the hourglass
how minutes skip next to pendulums -

…Then moments in between would never last

so many brick walls
of clocks always yelling
you to stop

This is my burning question
to the sunrise:
Why does it always seems to end
when you wish it’d only just began

like when hidden sun ray beams
exude non-orange breeze
there are no answers
if we calculate….

we can only live between
the concrete
and the cotton clouds

without obligations
to the night sky
and the ticking clocks

but at times
we tie our hands
too tight

to things
we think
too much about….

I wish I knew
At least some answers
those I know
I never will

So I just bow to the new moon
And accept the lone star shine.

and I stare at the sky
I know you wish upon
and I never knew
how long it took
before my eyes gave in

before realizing
it took forever

..for my sight to
become
so clear again.

Monday, May 17, 2004 12:32 p.m.

diagnosis of a tv junkie
Doctor Unheimlich has diagnosed me with
Azira's Disorder
Cause:watching too much television
Symptoms:crying, mild euphoria, ability to fly
Cure:acupuncture
Enter your name, for your own diagnosis:

gosh.ditto.

Monday, May 17, 2004 01:10 a.m.

rookie road

they put me in charge for like 3-4 hours or so today..til the shift leader comes in at 4....meeee...the rookie "shift I/C"(read:never been in-charge)...o well..madnesss..sunday crowds are brutal..the rush or the so-called "slamming" seems like it'd never end...but it did..it eventually does..like a tornado tiring itself out into a breeze after awhile..wasnt too bad..telling pple what to do isnt so bad..I don't usually do that coz I hate it when someone tells me what to do..but ya..muahah..telling pple what to do isnt so bad..but I've definitely got a looong way to go before I ever become an official "shift I/C". pple depending on me is intimidating, I've always been ok with the security of depending on someone instead of someone depending on me...but..I guess I should flip it and reverse it..uh..put my name down flip it and reverse it..yea.work it.

Friday, May 14, 2004 10:48 p.m.

trick and treat

it's embarrassing not having enough cash when you're treating someone to lunch...muahah..you're all..c'mon c'mon I'll treat you I'll treat you and in the end you realize the place doesn't accept nets or card and you have to go withdraw money somewhere else first..or worse..ask the person you're treating to lend you some money first(money which they will never allow you to return to them)..

liza and I wanted to treat farz when she was in s'pore couple of weeks ago..she took out her money and we were like "no need la, our treat."..then she said.."aiyahh..at least let me pay 10 bux." and liza and I were adamant and kept saying no need no need..then we realized the place doesnt accept card..and we didnt have enough cash between the two of us to pay for the whole meal..wahahhah..in the end we took farz's 10 bux...

so today...I was on lunch break with a colleague whose b'day was bout a week ago...so I told her I'll treat her..and I kept ordering and ordering and in the end realize they didnt't accept nets so I had to run upstairs to draw some money..coz our break time is only a half an hour..so ya..pai seh..but it wasn't so bad, while I went to draw some money, she chatted up and flirted with the restaurant manager..wahah..flirt. happy belated b'day flirt. I suck at giving treats I know..in that case I won't give treats anymore la..set.

Friday, May 14, 2004 12:08 a.m.

smooth operator...................

I've officially had 12 hours of telephone survey interviewing experience..gahh..and my verdict: Not something I'd ever do again unless I'm paid like 10 bucks per hour or unless someone puts a gun to my head..muahah
well.......its not thaaat bad..young men were nice to talk to..hahah..in a survey kinda way...very co-operative..I had a 22 year-old guy who kept calling me ma'am even..bwahahah..hey I dont think I sound that old on the phone...must be all that NS or somethin..(yes? tell me it is..) so ya..to all you 20-something year old guys who were nice enough to be nice in answering the very repetitive and boring survey questions..thanxxx for making my life easier...well on the whole, younger people were quick and to the point..which made my job easier..older people..oh my gawd..older people...I ask a yes or no question about the internet and they give me a looong story about their family history and their relationship with their children and how they feel about religion..all pretty explicitly..and they still have the cheek to tell me that the questions are too personal...heckkkk...since you're more than willing to share with me more than personal details that I DIDN'T ask for..whyyy nott just answer these not very very personal questions..(why AH? why AH?)..muahah..o well..people are a funny species..(that sounds grammatically wrong....is it? I dunno, oh heck)..anyways..thank god today was my last day..I've had to repeat the questions like 456349 times and I swear I even snore it in my sleep..so yeaa..no morrre..dont worry..I won't be disturbing any more muslim households...
azira out.

ps: any ben affleck non-haters out there? I wanna watch jersey girrrrl...............................

Wednesday, May 12, 2004 10:29 p.m.


There are barn doors
And there are revolving doors

Doors on the rudders of big ships
We are revolving doors

There are doors that open by themselves
There are sliding doors
And there are secret doors

There are doors that lock
And doors that don't

There are doors that let you in
And out
But never open

But there are trapdoors
That you can't come back from

"pull/pulk revolving doors" - radiohead ----------------------------------------------------------