twisted frequencies @ 12:22 a.m.

###

Sunday, February 5, 2006
goodbye alice in wonderland

Jewel's baaaaaaaack yall!!!

And no hint of britney-esque sellout-ism remnants from the last album. hah.

An excerpt of her message on her website...

---

...I HAVE BEEN THINKING A LOT ABOUT THIS CD, ABOUT THE MUSIC BUSINESS, ABOUT HOW EVERYTHING WORKS. I AM IN THE BUSINESS, BUT IN A LOT OF WAYS I HAVE THE FREEDOM TO DO THINGS MY OWN WAY. I CARE A LOT ABOUT THIS RECORD. IT MEANS A LOT TO ME, AND I WANT YOU GUYS TO GET A FEEL FOR IT. IT GETS FRUSTRATING THAT FANS ONLY DOWNLOAD ONE SONG THEY HEAR ON THE RADIO. IT GETS FRUSTRATING THAT RADIO ONLY PLAYS CERTAIN SONGS THAT FIT A CERTAIN FORMAT. I HAVE SONGS THAT I THINK WILL DO GOOD ON RADIO, BUT THERE IS ONE SONG THAT SUMS UP THIS RECORD AND THIS TIME IN MY LIFE, MY WHOLE LIFE REALLY.......AND I DON'T THINK IT REALLY HAS A SHOT AT RADIO CAUSE ITS 6 MINUTES LONG. SO, I HAD A FRIEND SHOOT ME SINGING IT AT THE RANCH ON SUPER 8, AND IM GONNA RELEASE IT ON THIS WEB SITE TOMORROW. I WANT PEOPLE TO HEAR AND SEE THINGS WHEN THERE IS STILL NOTHING BETWEEN ME AND THE FEELING. SOON THERE WILL BE INTERVIEWS AND SINGLES AND THE DANCE WILL BEGIN. THE CIRCUS WILL WIND UP AND I WILL DANCE FOR MY SONGS THE BEST I KNOW HOW, BUT FOR NOW I WANT TO GIVE YOU A VISUAL THAT IS AS RAW AS MY LYRICS. IT'S THE TITLE TRACK ON THE RECORD. 'GOODBYE ALICE IN WONDERLAND'. I THINK I SAID IT ALL IN THE SONG, AND IT IS ALL PRETTY CLEAR. BUT I GUESS I WILL ANSWER QUESTIONS ABOUT IT IF U HAVE SOME. I WONT DO THAT FOR THE PRESS, MOST LIKELY, BECAUSE IT NEVER REALLY WORKS.

I HOPE YOU ENJOY. THE CD WON'T COME OUT UNTIL EARLY MAY, SO THIS IS MY TEASER. I MAY EVEN LEAK THIS ON THE WEB, SO THAT MORE PEOPLE CAN SEE AND HEAR THIS SONG BEFORE THE FIRST SINGLE DROPS.

HOPE YOU ALL ARE WELL,

JEWEL

extracted from jeweljk.com

__________

Yeaaa..Atta way to hype a new record. Leak the songs! Comin out in May. Yay. Bring the circus!!!

__________

'twas seven years ago I watched Jewel live in concert with some guy whose name I don't even remember now. Haha.

But it was awesome. It was like being invited to her home and her performance and chitchats with the audience were like teacakes and old-buddy-old-pal conversations.

We managed to sneak in to the first few rows in front (although wayy at the side) somewhere during the middle of the performance.

One of her vignettes I remembered (approximately) was the one behind the song "You were meant for me". Wasn't a cheesy ode to an old flame but an uncanny inspiration after being accidentally entangled in a drug bust. The song was written an hour or so after the tragicomic incident...or sumthin like that. Haha. I remembered it was strangely funny.

I remembered taking half-day in school on that day to take an MC coz I was (truly) sick. And my form teacher (who knew I was gonna go catch the show) went.."sure nottt sick?? you want to watch jewel tonight riiiight.." hahaha..but I was truly sick ok. But not sick enough to skip the show OF COURSE.

I remembered going to the polyclinic at bukit merah with Lianne..coz she was also sick. hahah. We had to wait so long coz it was my first time there and we had to register and all. I remembered the doctor asking me if my phlegm was yellow or white and I bullshitted and said yellow even though I haven't managed to spit it out to see it yet. even though I had NO IDEA phlegms came in two colours?! ew. Anyways..

I remembered it was during the period when my parents were in Mecca, doing their Haj. Heh. I could afford the ticket coz they left me and my brother some cash to tide us through the 2-3 weeks while they were gone. I swear it was fated that I went to the concert. Coz there was no way I could've afforded the tix coz I was 15 and broke and if my parents were around, no way I could've come home that late. So yea...I was so psyched coz I was Jewel's no. 22 fan.

My grandma and uncle stayed over while my parents were away at the time. I guess the only bad part of it was that I got her worried. But grandma worries about EVERYTHING, so I can't help it la. She kept paging me. (hahaha...omg, pagers! remember those?!) I called her using my date's handphone after the show and told her not to be so worried pleeez or else I won't come home at all. (muahah..kurang ajar eh) and that's what she said, "Kurang ajar ehh...kalau mak kau ader kau tak boleh pegi ni sumer kann" (So rude ahh..if your mom was around, you wouldn't have been able to do all these things right)..and she said she sent my uncle out to look for me. haha. And I just said that I was coming home already la. My date made sure I got to the taxi stand alright, asked if I had enough money for cab fare, all this after I refused joining him and his friends for supper. So nice. ok maybe I should call him my secret chaperone instead. I think he was a policeman. hahah. yea. don't ask.

So when I got home..at maybe 12++..I met my uncle on the lift. He did some late night grocery shopping. Inside the lift, he coolly asked me, "Tengok jewel eh? Best?" (You watched Jewel ah? good not?) ..muahahah. The only worry was facing the wrath of my grandma. (Although she's not the type to stay angry for days on end like my mom, maybe I kinda took advantage of that also)

Came home and found another aunt and uncle staying over. Grandma must've called them over to keep her company. So now I had to face them too but they were cool about it la. I can't remember if grandma was already asleep or not when I got back. But the next day I had my brother trying to give me a pep talk. "Eh what time you came home yesterday?" ..My bro?!?! HAHAhahahh. The bro who comes home at 3-4 am every night and treats the house like a hotel?! hahahaha..I kinda laughed at his face and slammed the door. hahah. Not to be rude or anything but just to...awaken him to the irony of the murderer advising the commoner not to use a real gun when protecting herself. And yea..I think he got it.

Ho well, now that's one buggy for the memory lane...

It's amazing la. You must wonder how suppressed my teenhood was. haha. And no la, my grandma didn't bust it out to my parents. I know she wouldn't la, if not I wouldn't have told her I was going to a concert. But it's telling her that I was going to a concert that made her worry so much also. So how?! you tell meee. Tell her that I was gonna sleepover at a mosque? hahah. I bet she imagined me drinking jolly shandy at the void deck after moshing in the crowd and having guys cup a feel at my ass every chance they get during the 'concert'. (which, just so you know, nothing like that happened)

Because old people imagine the worsst you know. Even these days, my grandma would suddenly call me up and when I ask why she called, she'd say something like, "Oh just now I heard on the radio got accident at PIE...takot engkau..(afraid it was you)" ..hmm. haha.

Fine. You can tell me that I cannot stop them from worrying. But what can I do to make them trust that I can take care of myself? If you say nothing then I am truly disappointed la. Why can't they live on the faith that they have raised me well that even in the worse case scenarios that they draw in their heads I can choose to make the right decisions. That I won't snatch the nicotine stick and puff it out of curiosity when offered, that I won't sip a drop of Vodka when pestered, that I won't unzip his pants when tempted. hahaha. WHy can't they trust me to think for myself to choose common sense over senselessness?!? Or that if I were to succumb to mistakes that it would only make me stronger eventually??

Someday I'll translate this entry into malay and maybe give it to them. heh.

What can I say, we're Asians.

Eh, and how did I get to be talkin bout this when I started out talkin bout Jewel's coming album eh?

Musta been a mish-mash of nostalgia and suppressed teenhood angst. hehah. ok whatever. Jewel rocks. Someday I wanna share with her this story over a hazelnut latte with caramel drizzle as I ask her to elaborate on her adventures from Rome to Knoxville as she chased down the dawn.

Until then. Time to say goodbye to alice in wonderland...?

"growing up is not absence of dreaming
it's being able to understand the difference between
the ones that you can hold
and the ones that you've been sold..."