I got the pic for May's layout scanned, so I should start making the new layout for this place this weekend. Beh, even though there are only 12 days left of school, time is going very slow. I almost feel like I'm living a double life-- there's the slow life at school, and then there's the long life at home. o.O? Ah well. Twelve more days of school; twelve more days of May. Strange.

I haven't been writing lately, and I'm actually disappointed in myself. I should at least be thinking of some topic to write about, but I got nothing. I've been preoccupied with other stuff, like school projects, hanging out with my sister, listening to my Spider-Man soundtrack almost non-stop, and of course there's the whole semi obsessing over Spidey in general. Yes, I believe I *have* crossed that fan line. Or at least I'm standing on it.

My sister and her husband took me to go see Spider-Man last sunday night. It was fun. Although, it wasn't as exciting as it was when I first saw the movie. I think it's because I already knew what was going to happen, so I began thinking about something else and when I turned my attention back on the movie, I was all like "hey, didn't something happen *before* this???" and I got all confused. Oh well. Next time I see the movie I'm going to try stay more focused. {{nods head}}

OH! And it *is* true, none of the songs that are on the movie Soundtrack are in the movie except for Sum 41's "What We're All About" (played on the car radio when Peter and Uncle Ben talk for the last time) and Macy Grey's "My Nutmeg Phantasy" (sung in concert at the World Unity Festival). There's also the orchastra at the beginning of the movie and at the end, but that shouldn't really count since it's only on the soundtrack because it was made directly for the movie to introduce the opening and ending credits. So, that whole thing is kind of odd. But, they do play "Hero" as the first real song at the ending credits. And yes, it does sound much better in the theater than on my stero. But that's because the movie theater has those huge sound systems with Dolby Digital. Who can beat that?

Okay, must go now, have... something due tomorrow that I'm sure I'll remember at the last moment. Ew, yuck, I just remembered something. In Biology we're disecting stuff! EWWWWWW! Today we did a Starfish. I'm not sure what we'll be doing tomorrow. Gross. Not something I wanted to think about before going to sleep. Bleh!

Just finished updating my website. Nothing new, except for some online tests and a bunch of cliques. I joined a Spider-Man fanlisting thing... te he, I'm afraid I might be on the verge of becoming obsessed. Oh well. o.O

I want to make a new layout for this place, but I don't know if I'll be able to with my sister coming tomorrow. We have to leave for the airport early mid-morning, and I know Mom will be stressed out with making the house clean and perfect, which means I won't be able to scan the pic I drew for the new layout. Hmm... Maybe I should create a Spider-Man layout instead? Nah, I'll save it for next month along with other good summer movies. I want this month's layout to be more focused on Graduation and such.

Mwa ha ha, I've had the Spider-Man movie soundtrack for about 25 hours now, and I'm loving it! I'm actually feeling pretty lucky, since all the stores here were sold out except for K-Mart who only had about 5 left. What makes it cooler is that I got one of the 3-D special edition covers, and there were only 500,000 made. *^__^* You see, it does pay off to live in a small town! I'm listening to Sum 41's "What we're All About (the original version)" at the moment. It's good, but it actually has absolutely nothing to do with the movie or Spider-Man. But it's still good. My favorites so far are "Learn to Crawl" by Black Lab, "Bug Bytes" by Alien Ant Farm, "Undercover" by Pete Yorn and of course "Hero" by Chad Kroeger. But you probably saw that one coming. ;) Most of the songs are pretty cool, which is really good. Usually most CDs have only a few good songs and the rest are kinda crappy. I'm glad I got it. :)

My sister and her husband come to visit with us for a week, starting tomorrow. I can't wait to see her! I haven't seen her since...last year? I don't remember. But it'll be nice to talk with her instead of just writing letters. If you haven't noticed, I'm not the most commited person around.

I'm really starting to worry about college. I mean, I'm almost certain that I won't be able to afford it when I get out of High School, and maybe even for a few years afterwards. Especially if the colleges I want to go to on the West Coast cost somewhere between - grand a YEAR. What makes it worse is that my friend keeps saying how she's not sure if she wants to go to college or not because she is so over school. Then she goes on to say that it doesn't really matter because she doesn't care about anything over here because the week after she graduates she's off to sweden to live with her boyfriend and "live happily ever after". Yech. And she probably could, too, since both her family and his family are like super-rich because of their great-great grandparents owning land or something incredibly unfair like that. Usually I wouldn't feel any resentment or anything, but because she keeps shoving it my face, and the fact that she could afford to go to Harvard University for four years without breaking a sweat or debt, I'm seriously afraid that I'll explode and say something nasty.

Anyway, if I can't go to a college on the West Coast, I think my only other shot is at the Pacific University. I heard it's only around - thousand a year. I really don't want to go there though, because I desperately want to leave the islands. I must go somewhere where the four seasons are completely distinguished from each other. But... if the price is right, how can I refuse?

You know what? Money sucks. It seriously, seriously does. I hope it burns in Hell. Even if it is a lousy piece of green paper. (and the occasional silver coin).

We just came home from the airport and Mom is doing good. Tired, but good. Me, being the worst liar on Earth, cracked up laughing when Mom said that she was sorry that me and Dad didn't Spider-Man yesterday. She wasn't mad though, so it's all cool. I'm not sure when we'll see it all together, but hopefully soon. God, I *SO* love that movie. When it comes to DVD, I'll be first in line to buy it. And the soundtrack, too. The music from the movie will come to stores May 13th, so start saving money, people! ^__^

Ewwwww, I didn't update my website again this weekend. Oh well. Spidey kind of took up most of my Saturday, and I had to help make a flower lei for Mom this morning, so now all's I got is the afternoon, which will most likely be spent doing homework and listening to the repetitive 30-second demo of "Hero" by Chad Kroegar that I downloaded from the spiderman website. Hmmm, I wonder... if I keep saying how much I like Spider-Man, will my dear older siblings start sending me stuff? ^_~? LOL, I love being the youngest. It rocks. And so does that movie! Yeee!

As of this moment (actually, it was a few hours ago, but detailed details aren't important), I am utterly in love with Spider-Man and Tobey Maguire (Yeee!). What is the meaning of this? Ahhh, I so wish to tell, but at the moment the details must remain hush-hush as to secure my future ticket to the movies with the parental unit. But I will let you in on one thing: MY WEEKEND KICKED! Woo-hoo! *^__^*

Hmmmm, perhaps I should create a Spider-Man layout? I already downloaded one of the movie posters for my laptop's desktop background.... Ta-haa-haa!

Hmmm, is it wrong to find joy in other people's discomfort? Even when that certain person has been completely rude and a total bitch to you for the past month or so? Is it? Well, there's this girl at my school who has this total attitude problem, like she's queen of the world and everyone below her is like inferior scum. It seriously bugs me. Anyway, there's this guy who really likes her but she totally does NOT like him. Both of them are in one of my classes, and today that guy would not leave that certain annoying girl alone. And when I saw that look on her face when she *knew* that the guy would not shut up and walk away, I couldn't help but break out into a giant grin. Is that wrong? Is there something wrong with me? I dunno, but from that moment on the rest of my day was filled with sunshine and I was singing O Happy Day. {{Although I'm not really sure if that's a real song}}

Talking about songs, today I was the new music video for the Spider-Man soundtrack. This one is by Chad Kroeger from NickleBack {{my favorite band! *^_^*}}, and some other guys whom I don't remember at the moment. Anyway, they wrote/sung this song called "Hero" and it totally kicks butt! I love that song! And the music video isn't bad either! ^___^ I can't wait to see that movie! It looks really good. Me an' Dad will probably see it on Saturday before we pick up Mom at the airport.

Ah, yes, me ol' mum is coming back, and so that ends my week of almost-freedom. Unfortunetly, I did not take advantage of my "there's no one here to stop me from not going to school" time. Stay home tomorrow and have a 3-day weekend? Oh, hell no! Tomorrow I have a field trip to the Food Culinary School of Arts and we get a four-course meal! YUM~~!! There's no way I'd miss that on purpose. XD

On to the website notes. I'm creating a new layout for this place for May, and should have it up either this weekend or sometime next week. I also have a new poem and art pic for Musogato. I will also actually start signing up for Cliques. About time, eh? I've only said that I'd start for the past two months now! -_-;;;

ummmmmmmmm..... I guess that's it. Can't wait for the new layout! I like this one a lot, but, gotta keep up with the 'new layout for every month' thing. Must keep working on my HTML skills. Ja matta!

I was 10 seconds away from missing my bus to school this morning. 10 seconds. Do you realize how bad that would have been for me?? There's no one to drive me to school! Now usually, I wouldn't mind staying home because of a missed bus, infact, I pretty much wished it would happen. BUT, today I have this huge, oh-my-god-it's-so-flippin-big project due today for Biology. It's so big, that if you stayed home because you were "sick", you had to come back with a doctor's note. That's how big it is. And I was 10 seconds away from missing my only ride and possibly failing Biology for the year. 0_0!!!

Okay, no more bad-wishing for me. Might come true. And knowing my relationship with fate/karma, it probably would. Soooooooooo not comforting.

I can't believe how much homework I neglected this weekend. Ouch. Weekends + Homework just don't seem to mix well for me. Oh well. 5 more weeks then its summer. ^__^

Anyway, I saw the Japanese anime movie Metropolis last night. It was really good! It was kind of a mix between the movie A.I. --Artificial Intelligence (only less confusing), and the Bible story of the Tower of Babel (only set in the future). Apparently it came out early this year, but I never heard of it until I saw it at BlockBuster. If you haven't seen it, I suggest you do. It was critically acclaimed by director James Cameron, and that alone tells you its good. I'd tell you more about the movie, but A) I don't want to ruin it, B) the bell is going to ring any moment (I'm at school now) and C) I don't remember most of the characters' names and the plot is kinda complicated to tell right off the top of my head. But I do suggest that you see it. Trust me, its a good movie. :)

Hoo boy, am I hungry. I could really go for a midnight snack right about now. Mmm, but later. Must report newest events first. Then eat. {{Hums at the thought of food}} ^_^;

Okay, event number one: I stayed up till 4 in the morning on Friday/Saturday, finishing up a story for Jade*Island. Good news, it's completed! Yay! I formatted it into HTML and uploaded it to Fanfiction.net, where it recieved two reviews in under an hour! A new record for me! Double Yay! :) The story is called The LipGloss Mastermind ~ Act 1. I plan on making three Acts, each one having two chapters. Anyway, I'll upload the story to my website after I get my snack. {{Mmmm, fooooooood...}}

Event number two: My Mom left for the nation's capital today on business. That means I'll practically have the house to myself for an entire week. In the mornings my Dad leaves for work around the same time that I wake up, and doesn't come home till late. That means that there's no one to stop me from NOT going to school! Yee! {{cracks up laughing}} Never thought I'd see the day where I had the *option* of whether to stay home for the day or not. Unfortunetly though, if I did decide to take advantage of the situation, the Karma would probably come back to bite me in the butt later. It usually does that, even when I don't do anything wrong. Oh well. Still, I can't help it if I miss the bus... XD

Event number three: I just finished reading a fic on FanFiction.net, and I honestly have to say that it was *the* best fanfiction I've ever read. A tad on the angsty-dark side, but it was the best written work I've ever layed eyes on. It was simply beautiful. Read this wonderful story here. Trust me, it's *really* good.

Event number four: I'm going to go grab my midnight snack now. Yum!

According to the 1980 Random House Dictionary ---

Human - Adj. -

1. Pertaining to, or characteristics of mankind. 2. Having or showing the form or attributes of a human being.

Human Being - Noun -

1. A person as distinguished from other animals. 2. Pertaining to the Human Race or Humankind.

According to the 2002 April addition of, well, myself ---

Human - Noun -

1. A person, originally created by God.
2. Not perfect, I repeat, NOT perfect. They are bound to make mistakes, no matter who they are. Some will make more mistakes than others.
3. Has the potential to create and to destroy, live with intelligence or in bliss, use their power for good or for evil.
4. Was given the right of freedom of thoughts; to be able to choose between right and wrong, act and not act. We have the choice.

Mankinds' enemy is ultimately his own self. His worst attributes are pride, prejudice, and the ever changing ego. The primitive law of "Every man for himself" is hard to erase from out subconscious. We can't help it, it is in our nature. The never-ending need to survive and claw-our-way-to-the-top lives within each of us, whether we wish to acknowledge it or not. But that is our choice, our individual, God-given choice. It's our lives-- we'll live how we want. Perhaps this is why those who act selflessly are praised and treated like heros. Because we are too conceeded to act that way ourselves.

**glances at the above** Just something I've been thinking about. Thought you pita readers would be interested. Oh, and Happy Earth Day. Go plant a flower or a tree, or something. Yeah.

There's no school on monday, which means I have a 3-day weekend. YAY! I'm determinded to finish at least one story for Jade*Island, and upload it this weekend. I also have a new poem or two for Musogato, along with a new pic. All should be up and ready by Monday. If not, well then that's me for ya. I also plan to start signing up for cliques and such. I wonder if I should wait until I have more stuff on my site...? Oh well.

It rained today after school. It was nice. I wanted to stand in it but I was wearing a white T-shirt. Figures, huh? I always have bad timing like that. So despite the lovely rain, I had a pretty rotten day. Even though I was wearing my excruciatingly cool brand-new jeans. I love 'em. I ordered them last week from Gap.com, and oh my God they're so cool! I'm totally in love with them. There's a pic of them below, borrowed from Gap.com.

Aren't they pretty? Of course they are. So anyway... where was I? Oh yeah, rotten day. Eh, what am I talking about, most days at school are bad. That's why everyone hates that place, right? Ah well. 3-day weekends always make things better. :)

{{laughs}} I learned an interesting fact today. I was placed in Kindergarden when I was only 4 and half years old. Problem? Most little kids start school when they're 5 or 6 years old. So that means I'm a year or two younger than most of the teens in my grade. But I already knew that. What I *DIDN'T* know is that most of my teachers from elementary school AND middle school (we don't call it Junior High over here) said that even though I was doing excellent academically, I wasn't "socially mixing in well" with the other kids and that maybe I should be held back a year. {{narrows eyes into a cold glare}} Well, isn't that a nice thing to know, considering I only have one year left of High School! It seems that once again Fate has decided to hand more bad timing my way. >:[ So is this why I'm so socially enept? Well if it's not, I can always blame my genes or my parents. That usually works.

the Eternal Little Sister signing off. yech.

It's wierd to think that what I write here is being read by other people. Some people I know, others I don't. It's actually kinda creepy. Who gave them permission to read what I'm thinking? Guess that's the price for having an online journal. Not that I really write anything profound or back-stabbing over here. That's for the other journal. ^_~ (joking... Sheesh, you're so serious!)

Anyway, I have another poem ready for Musogato. I'll try to upload it this week, although most likely on Saturday. Summimasen on the delay for the story at Jade*Island. I decided not to post it until I finish writing part two. But do expect a new Legend of Zelda mini-fic sometime soon.

Ugh, I've had a headache all day. It started raining though, so that was nice. Rain is good, so very good. I wish it rained more often. {{smiles}} Now *that* would be nice.

I saw ClockStoppers at the 4:30pm show today. OH. MY. GOD. It was *sooooooo* COOL! {{squeals really loudly}} Aw, I loved it. It was really cool and I had a great time. I haven't been to the movies in so long, it's scary. The last movie I saw in the theater was Oceans 11 (another fantasic movie) and that was in December. How do I remember this? I keep my movie tabs, duh!

Like I said, I had a lovely time. I got all nice and dressed up, went to the theater, and I saw a bunch of guys from and school. They all gave me these looks like they were saying "Oh my gawd, that's Jade???" I was laughing so hard on the inside. ~*^-^*~ So anyway, when I got to the right movie room, it was so flipping dark I couldn't see if any seats were open. I could hear people *somewhere* in the middle, but it was too dark and I kept tripping over myself on the stairs. I eventually gave up and walked all the way to the bottom, across the room, climbed over the guardrail and sat down in the front row. By the time the movie started, there were little kids all around me, one slightly tapping on the bottom corner of my chair, and the one next to me kept kicking my leg. I had to put my feet up on the guardrail so that he couldn't kick me anymore. On top of that, the air conditioning was barely on and the whole room smelled like a dirty diaper. Although, it could have been from that awful over-greasy popcorn that the kid next to me had. ugh.

In short, I loved it. I know, it was incredibly annoying and all those little kids creeped the hell out of me, but I miss that!! I never go to the movies except on special occasions (Oceans 11 was seen on my birthday), and I feel like I'm all alone out here. Sure, I have the people at my school to aggrivate me, but I've gotten so used to their moronic-ness I don't even really notice it anymore. :( But my trip to the theater was perfect. The movie was great, there were bothersome people, all that was missing was to see my crush. Or better yet, him see me. ^_~ But *him* going anywhere near a movie by Nickelodeon? LoL, that'll be the day! So yeah, I had a great time. The end :D

Want to hear about my adventure during lunch today? Then pull up a seat 'cause it's kinda long and sorta profound. Well, to me it is. Anyways...

Today during my English class we were doing these mini-group book seminars. In my group there's Cecile, a semi-popular girl whom I thought was a bimbo; and Eddie, this very spiritual guy who really likes to preach about the Bible and Christ to all the student body. Anyway, Cecile and Eddie were talking while I was writing up my conclusion on the seminar. All of a sudden Eddie turns to me and asks "So, how's your relationship with God?" In short, after hearing this I freaked. I mean what kind of question is that?! I dunno! And that's exactly how I reacted, except I said "um" a whole lot and finally said "Okay, I guess... I dunno," Eddie stared at me for a bit then nodded and continued his conversation with Cecile. As you can see, that question totally caught me off guard and it really made me wonder how was my relationship with God. So I decided that right after class ended I would find a place in the shade (I despise sitting in the bright sun), and think long and hard about it.

Now on to the adventure part. Yay! Okay, so when class was let out and Lunch began, I started looking for a quiet place to sit down. Not as easy as it sounded. First I traveled down to the office, since there was lots of shade and sorta quiet. Well, it was shady, but not very quiet. So I walked around the building where I met up with some friends whom I hang out with afterschool while waiting for the bus. After saying "hi" and all I moved on, still not finding a good place to stay. Then I went back to the main road between the main classroom buildings slowly making my way to 'D' building. I really didn't want to go, but I ended up going up to the third floor where my Biology class was. So I leaned against the balcony for a while trying to figure out where to go. There was only 30 minutes in total for lunch, and I wasn't sure how much time I had left. Out of nervous habit, I pulled off one of my rings and began to play with it in my hands. The silver ring that my Daddy gave me from when he went to Japan while in the Navy. I played with it 3-stories up with my hands right above the hand-rail. Needless to say, the ring slipped out of my grip, bounced off the rail and disappeared into the bushes below. Completely freaked, I rushed down the flights of stairs while praying that I'd find my ring.

When I reached the bottom I walked along the sidewalk until I found the bushes that were right below where I was upstairs. I lifted up a plasic bag, and found my pretty little ring sitting on leaf like it was a pillow. After thanking God I dashed to the library to write this in my notebook.

When I finished writing all that I noticed something about the whole ordeal. I know my realationship with God is not as close as we both would like, but when I need help I know He always has my back. It's comforting, ya know? So there's my adventure for the day. YAY. ^-^

Here I am, at the library. At lunch time. All alone. lovely >.< I know when I'm not wanted, so that's why I'm not hanging out on the bridge with Chelsea and Liz. I despise Liz because I know she despises me. Don't know why though, I'm always so nice. But she's been ditching lately and I'm sick of it. Always got the feeling she didn't like me, ever since Freshman year. She's definitely got a problem, and I don't give a flying middle finger about it any longer. And that's why I'm here. In the library. All alone. Ah jeeze, what am I going to do for the next 30 minutes?! I got nothing to do but surf the net...and I can't think of anything to look up. Blech.

Hmm... I didn't update Jade*Island last night. Oh well, forgot that I didn't have anything to upload anyways. The story that I was going to upload--- it wasn't in HTML form. And I don't like formatting a 2500+ word story at 11pm on a school night. Not my style. Or, at least not on a school night that is.

In English, we got this extra credit assignment; There's an anual Haiku contest thing going on, and if we write a haiku and send it in, we'll get much needed extra credit. Me and Brad were the only people who asked to sign up, But I think Brad only signed up because I did. Brad is one of the most popular guys in my grade, but most people (non-popular, mind you) think that he's really annoying and not that smart, yet no one can understand how he's in all the honor and AP classes, and gets A's and B's. I sure don't know how he does it. Anyway, I used to have a neutral but somewhat close opinion like the others until a few weeks ago. A couple weeks ago in English we had to do this Nature Journal and Poem project, and we had to present it in front of the class. Naturally, I didn't turn mine in on time, so I didn't get to read my poem outloud. I was actually disappointed, I really wanted to read it to the class. I would have knocked their socks off! heh-heh-heh-heh.... (If you want to read the poem, it's intitled "Out There" and it's on my website--- in the Musogato domain, Writings section.) Anyway, Brad did his project on a vacation to Mouna Kea, and his poem was really beautiful. I sorta see him in a different light now, like maybe he isn't as shallow and dumb as everyone takes him to be. Now don't take this as a subtle hint that I like him, because I certainly do NOT like him. Ewwwww.... that's just creepy. I do have more respect for him than I used to, but sometimes I do wonder if he really wrote that poem all by himself. I won't ask him though, that would be rude.

Anyways, back to the Haiku thing. It has to be 5,7,5, and on nature or seasons. Most of them may most likely be about the ocean, beach, surfing, or summer like stuff, with the occasional spring since it's April. I'm going to write a whole list of Haikus, maybe 7 or so about different stuff, then let my friends and teachers help me pick out the best one to send in. It has to be post marked by April 20th, so I'll try send it out on April 15th or sooner if I can.

CRAP! The bell rang! Must go. Ta-ta!

Well, here is my next layout for this blog. I figured that with the new month I should have a new visage for this place. I've been having trouble writing here. Ya know, that's what I love about websites. Every layout is like a clean slate; something new to start from, as if starting from scratch. **smiles** If you haven't guessed already, this layout is more on the somber side-- and I like it like that. I feel it better matches my mood.

So... what is new with me? Let's see. My laptop and TV are back in my possesion, thank God. My parents took them both away last week because I refused to do a certain 7-page research paper for my History class. I was convinced that I would still pass that class even though I wouldn't have turned in that awful project. When my parents found out they completely flipped and took my beloved items hostage. >_<; I ended up doing the project and turning it in one day late. I also failed to meet the minimum requirements, but oh well. Anything is better than a zero. bleh. I can't wait for school to be over with. Just 8 more weeks left, then I'm free...free for the summer... **sighs contently**

On a lighter note, I updated Musogato.com this weekend. There are two new poems waiting to be read. I meant to update Jade*Island as well, but I kinda ran out of time. I guess I //could// update it now, but I really don't feel like it. I've had a headache for the past hour or so. Oh, crap. Now I'm starting to want to update the site. That figures. I have to go to sleep soon! I don't have time for this!! **sigh** I better gather my files to upload...

Sayoonara minna-san.