Tuesday, February 27, 2001 07:39 p.m.
another evening, trapped in the office, techno music blasting as my mind zombies into a state infused with perplexed code and a damn desktop that keeps phasing in and out! i've been having problems all day with my work area as i might call it. [sigh] my project launches tonight--yay!!! finally....there's a launch party in about half an hour where we will hopefully chill back and relax.

i bought my ticket last week to go to new york city this friday...i cannot wait. i'm gonna stay with anna whom i miss so dearly much. there's so much for the 2 of us to catch up on...then on tuesday, i'll make my way somehow down to d.c. and meet up with linda where we will take off and fly to San Juan, Puerto Rico!!! god, i really need this vacation. i just need to get away from work and not think about anything. i wanna lie on the beach, sipping margaritas, and check out all the eye candy.

well, i went on a date with lawyer boy last week...ate at tango--yum yum. we saw each other the night after and then again a few days later...many times. i'm going to have lunch with him tomorrow too. hmmm. i'm afraid to write much for fear of him discovering my weblog and knowing my thoughts before i could ever voice them to him...not that it's bad or good.

a new web dev started on monday. that makes 3 direct reports now. eeks.

jocelyn is back in seattle...i loved hearing about her crazy adventures traveling with julia and climbing mt. kilmanjaro (sp?). i wish i had the willpower that julia has to just take off time and travel around the world like that. anyhow, it was so wonderful seeing jocelyn again.

and of course, went snowboarding again over the weekend---this time, with ben up at stevens on sunday. i really thought i'd be on my own the entire time...but we actually rode together the entire day! i was so excited...given, we were on super easy runs for ben...but it was sweet that he didn't get fed up with me and actually volunteered to ride with me all day. i even told him he could go off on his own but he wanted to continue riding with me...so that was cool. i really need to buy equipment.

ack. so many things to do before i take off:

• figure out how to efficiently get my new web dev to spend his time next week while i'm gone.
• get summer sandals
• find all my cute summer outfits and see if i fit in them anymore
• write all my peer reviews and self evaluation in the next 2 days
• pack.
• maybe get new swimsuit?

Tuesday, February 20, 2001 12:37 a.m.
I worked a lot last week. My weblogs were getting monotonous...so sad.

It snowed in Seattle also at the end of the week---like, real snow. That is, it actually stuck on the ground and was a little difficult to drive in..but it was just a few inches. I found it hilarious how this city just crumbled at the site of snow. All the news stations called it "Snowstorm 2001!" [insert dramatic bass line]...and then after it all melted after just one day, they all talked about "the aftermath of snowstorm 2001". All the schools closed...some businesses...but not Amazon! It was pretty seeing the snow...I immediately ran out and took pictures. I figured it was a rare experience.

Weekend was a lot of fun....on Friday night, I hit this hip-hop show by the Slum Villagers at I-Spy with Jon and Owen...and ended up hanging also with Jaume, Justin, Juli and all their respective friends. It was such a fun show since I haven't danced to hip-hop in awhile. I went nuts. I also met Jon's new girlie-girl, Reina---she rocks! I liked her a lot and hope things work out between the 2 lovebirds. Afterwards, we all crashed some random U-Dub party...anyhow, that night, I met this guy who's a friend of a guy that works with Jaume...his name's Jason and he asked me out to dinner. I haven't been on a date-date in awhile...I'm all nervous. Anyhow, he called me tonight and we had a really great conversation. We're going to Tango (good choice) on Thursday...let's see what happens.

Speaking of randomness in meeting boys, I was also asked out by a coworker. I don't know how to react yet...

The rest of the weekend was pretty easy...didn't really do much on Saturday except for buying a fondue pot! And I made my first fondue that night...though I probably put too much wine and kirsh in. Sunday, I hit Crystal Mtn with Jon & Owen, which was a lot of fun. I tried snowboarding again and was having a great time...I even did a run with Jon at the end of the day, and for the most part, was able to keep up with him.

Today was a yucky day at work. Bad stuff. Was not happy. Went to yoga afterwards...calmed down. I'm really getting into this yoga thing.

Tuesday, February 13, 2001 05:37 a.m.
i'm at work at a really ungodly hour. i'm here to push out content for the video/dvd group to announce the Oscar nominations. there are a surprising number of people that get on the 5:15am bus.

we set back launch of my project by 2 weeks...for PR/Business reasons. i actually feel better about it. i was a little worried.

last night, i went to my first yoga class with peter...it was so incredibly invigorating. i immediately signed up for a 2-month membership and have vowed to meet peter at this yoga center at 7am at least twice a week. if things go well, i might quit my gym and make this my primary workout. the whole experience reminded me of theatre exercises...of closing our eyes and getting in tune with our bodies...especially of playing contact where control and balance are key. now this is what i need. i'm told that i did well considering it was my first class..and also since it wasn't really a beginner's class...but i think it was mostly because of my dance background. i just felt incredibly inflexible throughout the class...but it's just a matter of time. afterwards, i joined peter with his friends--including the yoga instructor--at the gravity bar for dinner...yum yum.

Sunday, February 11, 2001 10:53 p.m.
oh, i'm tired. i'm still at work...hanging out with robert and ezra, drinking dr. pepper. i'm worried. i don't know if we will launch.

Sunday, February 11, 2001 09:18 p.m.
i'm at work again. but i got to eat yummy malaysian food care of HB as a result.

Sunday, February 11, 2001 05:41 p.m.
i'm at work again. but hopefully i can leave soon. i'm definitely going to IKEA tonight. watched the first 3 episodes of the sopranos last night.

Saturday, February 10, 2001 09:03 p.m.
wow, it's 9pm and i'm at work. i've been here for the past 7 hours...on a Saturday!!! i didn't think i'd be here this long...i was just going to come in for about 2 hours or so. it's all about last minute bugs. i was even going to go to IKEA to buy my neat bamboo curtain..but there goes that idea. i just want to curl up on my couch and watch a movie at home tonight. i have to come in again tomorrow.

betina got a full size bed today and was assembling it as i left. perhaps i'll see her more often now, with a larger bed (yay!)

found an interesting website of a former amazon employee...he made a video making fun of our environment.

i put my HP printer up for auction on ebay. i've never auctioned anything off online....there's this terrible fear that i did something wrong and i'll lose all this money.

Thursday, February 8, 2001 11:53 p.m.
i'm tired. long day...but a good day. right after work, i made dinner and headed off to see the pacific northwest ballet's "sleeping beauty" with phoebe. a very long ballet--3 hours. the girl who played aurora had major problems holding her attitudes even though it comprised a large part of her choreography. god, i miss dancing. i think i'm going to quit the gym. i don't know what i've been doing...i'm not really a gym person. i want to take classes at a dance studio and start up yoga...something to refresh my mind.

i'm completely redoing my bedroom. i just got a new bed frame...i've never had a bed frame in my life. it's one of those cool, cast black iron ones..."something to hold onto" as many of my guy friends would say. and i'm going to run to ikea and buy a bamboo curtain thing-a-ma-bob and drape it against the wall. then find some neat cloth and hang that over the bamboo.

i'm bummed..i was going to go to whistler this weekend with eugene, but i've got this big launch next week...and guilt came over me last night, and i decided to stay.

manine, the sweetheart, bought me a "seaweed pedicure" as a lil' goodbye present from her. what a great team...i'll miss them so much. did i mention the really awkward "goodbye music, hello video" party that was held for me last week? well, normally, the admin. assistant makes arrangements for these sorts of things; however, she was (doh!) laid off a few days before...and no one knew. so everyone gathered in pike 1744, standing around awkwardly, as if they were at a meeting...then manine stood up and gave a random (but very sweet) speech...explaining how things weren't as festive as they should be because of the sudden loss of laura, people clapped, then left. i felt weird.

i just found out that lilchrissy thinks i have "genius prose"...wow. thanks. that totally baffles me. i think my writing sucks. at least on this site. i'm not really one to express myself well in writing...i'm all about verbalizing. also, my parents have complete access to this site and i fear what i may reveal.

i'm realizing more and more how much smith has influenced me in my years. i have this need to be surrounded by strong women who are comfortable in their skin and able to express their honest selves....those that can see past "what's right/wrong" and embrace the beauty of what makes me strong and weak. phoebe really does that for me.

my little brother called me up this week, asking me to create this lil website for him, displaying his entire portfolio so that he can get an internship this summer. then it dawned on me---he really needs me! it's odd...there's always this strange distance between us, and i think it's a guy-girl thing or something like that. or perhaps it's that acknowledgment from him that he trusts that i can do what he needs...and is asking for help. warm fuzzies all around.

had dinner with matthew last night at this random italian restaurant owned by a chinese couple. oh, and the restaurant offers a limo service. but it was totally fun. things are well with matthew...i just wish i could spend more time seeing him. i saw a picture of his new girlfriend for the first time too. it was a little shocking at first because i wasn't expecting it...but then i was relieved, to finally know. i think i'm going to be single for awhile. there are so many things that i haven't had a chance to do while i was dating matthew. there aren't so many rules either. i can have my fun as long as i know i'm emotionally okay with it. but who knows. i'm even thinking about visiting wil in germany. i don't know why. in some ways, i'm curious about what he's doing out there. between march and may, he'll be "out in the field", training his military boys and playing combat games. that world is so surreal to me. i think i really miss him.

Sunday, February 4, 2001 11:04 p.m.
what a nice weekend...I got to hang out with people that I don't see that often. on friday night, brad invited me to his friend rick's bday dinner at typhoon where i met a bunch of his college friends and his best friend from san fran. afterwards, we just headed back to brad's place where i engaged in the most interesting conversation with his good friend matthew, matt, sousa...whatever people call him. anyhow, i had a really great time meeting all of brad's friends and just talking to all of them.

i then spent all of saturday with phoebe in southcenter. that place gets more and more ridiculous i go there...it's like a huge vacuum cleaner, where it sucks you up and won't let you out until you've spent at least $100 in one of its hundreds of stores. i got a new alarm clock (yay!..my old one died), a new minishelf stereo system (the cd player on my old one is fried), and lots of other random things that i don't really need (i.e.--the Eurosealer...it creates that seal on plastic bags...and functions as a refrigerator magnet at the same time!). and we ended the evening watching "billy elliott" at the b'way market theatre...god, i loved that movie. within the chaos of the events in his family's life, this young boy found pleasure in ballet! i love it! phoebe and i were in giggles, bringing back memories of dance classes.

and today, i went to steven's pass with the whole music site-dev team. manine and boris took ski lessons and everyone went off and did their thing. last minute, i decided to snowboard, which i'm glad i did. i don't think i could've survived today on skis....and it was so much fun on a board...the snow was soft and easy to fall on (not that i fell that much..ahem...[eyes wander])

but i'm exhausted now because i woke up at 5:30am and really only got about 3 hours of sleep since i always find myself staying up til 2am at least. but i've gotta crash now...me very sleepy....

Thursday, February 1, 2001 11:03 a.m.
ick...what a hard week it's been in the company. there were really huge layoffs on tuesday--15% of the company. i had a few friends that were let go...so sad. the overall mood is fairly somber, especially within editorial. some friends question the integrity and soul of this company. i don't know what to think. i feel like this is definitely a good move..and if we hadn't done it, i don't know how we'd survive in the eyes of the investors this next year. at the same time, could we have accomplished our goals without the layoffs? this is a much bigger hit than last year's which was only 2%. fortunately, i don't think anyone in web dev was affected.

other than that, the week has just flown by...working pretty long hours trying to get my project done..we're supposed to hit beta tomorrow. for the most part, i feel good about it all.

i caught temptation island for the last 10 minutes for the first time last night...what a disgusting show. can you imagine being one of the single people? and being paid to literally be meat?

yay--phoebe is back in town!

i didn't make it to the gym this morning..[sigh] but i went on monday, tuesday and wednesday..pretty good for me. i've decided to try to make my tuesday and thursdays a morning gym routine. gotta get in shape to go to puerto rico with linda!

Monday, January 29, 2001 11:10 p.m.
another week goes by...

oh, i'm living the single girl life...and enjoying it. i'm able to do so much that i couldn't do while i was dating matthew. i swore to myself that i wouldn't date/hook-up with another co-worker....but who else do i know in this freakin' town? i guess it's not a bad thing. fun, in fact. but i should watch myself so i don't get too carried away.

i went to steven's pass with olke on saturday--so much fun! i'm deliriously proud of myself because i snowboarded all day and did a pretty decent job. i didn't fall at all on my very last run...given, it was the daisy chair lift run..but still! i was able to go down some blues without killing myself too...i definitely have a lot more confidence. most of the time, i was boarding with darlene, olke's new woman...so sad...she's *so* into him and i think he's having hesitations. i hope things work out. Jon also went, kickin' olke's butt in the snow--ha ha. another person went too...but i didn't see him...and i shouldn't have even been looking out for him...but i was. how sad.

then we all went to see the kronos quartet at the moore theatre...what a fantastic show. i need to go out and see more concerts, plays, ballets, etc...afterwards, we went to jeanne's bday party which was kinda dying down..but there were lots of people there that i knew that I hadn't talked to in awhile.

superbowl sunday. my first time watching the superbowl since..gosh, i don't know when...high school? this event kinda came and went while i was at smith...no one seemed to really take notice except for lori, the only die-hard football fan amongst my whole crowd of friends. i was disappointed in the commercials this year, which is what i was looking forward to. i mean, if you're going to spend x gazillion dollars per minute on an ad, be a little more creative.

i've decided my entries are super boring..but that's because i don't really divulge much. i'm more of a private person than i ever thought...at least when it comes to this. i only hint at the events of my real life.

Tuesday, January 23, 2001 05:40 p.m.
i'm getting used to the hair...even liking it. had a pretty good weekend...though worked a bit. saturday night was "the big sexy", or the annual amazon ball..this time at the westin. it was a blast---we first went to see olke's video installation at the fuzzy engine in ballard, which was awesome. there was this piece called "get me the damn out of childhood" that involved a bunch of blowtorch-fused toys funneling out of a record player....and then, there was the ball. i loved seeing all my coworkers all dressed up, whether that was in formal gear or some crazy costume. we all ended up at olke's house afterwards...fun with the coworkers...[sigh]...perhaps a little too much fun ;)

went rockclimbing yesterday on sunday with ben...i really like vertical world...better than stone gardens. i'm so weak. blegh.

eugene had a birthday shin-dig at his place on sunday night--he's 27! wahoo!

then it was back to work yesterday....and Bowling Night in Canada 2001! yeah, so i go bowling with members of the music team...it's actually a ton of fun and i got to hang out and talk to some people i hadn't seen in awhile.

Saturday, January 20, 2001 01:18 a.m.
i chopped my hair off today. it's really short.

Thursday, January 18, 2001 10:30 p.m.
yes, i'm still at work. that's become a resounding theme in my entries lately.

oh, i'm hungry.

went crazy and spent a hundred bucks on cds tonight. that's what happens when i'm working too much...i feel the need to treat myself to something.

i've been listening to "set adrift on memory bliss" on repeat...it brings peace to me. this is a song that will always relax me.

hung out with brad the other night...yay!! he and i should hang out more often..it's always so fun. too bad that at any given time, one of us is always needing to work late.

i lost my badge. or i think i did. i'm now wearing a loaner one and my actual one is deactivated. =(

saw 2 movies last night: thirteen days and save the last dance...both fun to watch. i didn't know too much about the cuban missile criss, and the movie was pretty good--i really liked the actors who played the kennedys. however, i couldn't stop laughing every time kevin costner gave a feeble attempt at a boston accent. and the latter movie made me really want to go out dancing. it's so sad: seattle really lacks any good hip-hop clubs/bars. what gives?

i wonder if brian reads this.

Monday, January 15, 2001 08:48 p.m.
oh, I am so tired now. Work is just draining me. I can't see any content. I don't know why. How sad. A bunch of work I did in the past 2 weeks just went ka-put. Now I have to start over. I've been here for almost 11 hours. So much to do....

Whistler was really really amazing. I'll upload my pictures eventually..but I took a lot of great ones. I ended up not snowboarding at all...and skiied the entire time, which was well worth it. On Sunday, we went up to Seventh Heaven, which was ridiculously gorgeous. It was above the tree line and all whiteness everywhere. I didn't fall very much...but I must have fallen super hard at some point because I have a huge-ass bruise on my left hip now that hurts a lot. Didn't get much sleep either---we always partied and stayed up late...and then woke up really early. The group I went with was really huge--17 people...which made it hard for everyone to hang out together...too bad. It would have been nice to get a huge group shot of everyone holding their skis/snowboards at the base or something like that. It's hard to coordinate something like that...kudos to Jed and Eric for taking on the planning.

Just before I left for the weekend, I got a really long letter from Tanyel in Germany...wow, I haven't heard from him in so long. His writing is so eloquent and deep.

Aaron also apparently went snowboarding this weekend in Vermont with people from RISD...and he broke his wrist!! My mom's all worried sick.

I wonder who reads this.

Thursday, January 11, 2001 06:56 p.m.
My entries are getting spaced out by week now...I'm so lame in keeping this thing up-to-date. Anyhow, I'm sitting at work now, totally frustrated. I just realized something really horrible about this huge project that I'm working on...and...i'm scared. Well, it's not that bad in terms of what I need to do to avoid..it's just so like "ERGH". Work is starting to get hard now. I'm transitioning between two groups...and it's hard finding time to still be doing all the work I want to do for both. I've got meetings still with both and it's just double duty. I've had a ridiculous amount of meetings this week alone.

I had a really long 3 hour phone conversation with someone way in my past....wil. I know he's reading this so I should be careful with what I say (ha ha). Wow, I haven't said that name in awhile. It was good...talking to him. It's amazing how much people change...the decisions they make---so different from what you'd perceive. I never thought I'd say it, but I think I might be able to talk to him again. Of course, he's still in Germany...but I don't know..we'll see.

I'm going to Whistler tomorrow!!!! Yay!!! I love that place. It's going to be huge group of people too---17 in total...all crammed up together. Hopefully, it'll be fun and not a headache of coordination...I'm sure it'll be a blast. I'm going to ski one day and snowboard the other...I still can't decide what I like better.

Hung out with Matthew again last night..making dinner and then seeing "Proof of Life" (which was, eh, okay). Felt bad because there was a big group of people that saw Maktub at Sit&Spin...but I just really needed to hang out with Matthew and prove to him that we could have a good time together without any sort of emotional rollercoaster running. It's so weird staying such good friends with someone you've dated for so long....especially when they begin dating again and blatantly let you know a little more than you probably really want to know. But I don't want him to hold back. It's just a little awkward...but hopefully for not much longer.

Thursday, January 4, 2001 04:41 p.m.
new years was great. the party that jon took me to was actually a lot of fun. it was a really strange connection--->I work with Jon who went to college with Steve who did Americorps with Cathy who lived at the apartment and was partying with all her friends from the College of Wooster in Ohio. We danced to Millennium Hip Hop all night long and eventually everyone crashed--on the floor, couch, chair, etc...and Jon and I finally left around 10:30am in the icy cold.

Then it was back to work..which wasn't bad at all. Not much happened in the one week I was gone.

Dot-Com Guy finally leaves the house.

My New Year's Resolutions (ha!):

• To become more or a morning person
• To wake up early enough to work out in the mornings instead of the evenings
• To join up in some sort of extracurricular activity this year: join a choir, pick up piano again, or get involved in a theatre production of some sort