1) 2002
2) 2003/2004
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/ you know what. i hate being compared, so just frikkin don't. gawd. .comment ____________________________________________________ yo. Sunday, May 30, 2004 / 08:03 p.m. hi world. yeah. i'm still alive. still here. still here. still here. = [... .comment ____________________________________________________ hah. Tuesday, May 25, 2004 / 05:30 p.m. i don't get it. what, am i wasting my time giving two shits about our friendship when all you're going to do is be some prick? forget it then, fuck you. you know, it's one thing giving a peice of your mind, but you know what, it's another being a friggin asshole about it. maybe i used to feel obligated to take this sort of shit from you, but forget it, i realise how stupid i was for it. whatever, i'm not going to waste my time on this. fuck you, seriously, that's all i have to say. .comment ____________________________________________________ (= Monday, May 24, 2004 / 08:35 p.m. hahah i had so much fun today!!!! Got home almost an hour ago, didn't stay out for that long, but had a fun arse time. so i call my sew goh out...haven't seen that child for such a long time, and we had a merry old time as always =D. we have created a new game...called: (brace yourselves:) extreme mega sword ultimate fighting 2000.53 turbo!!!!! AHHAHAHAHA oh lord. went to toys R us, bought us some lovely swords and sheilds and chased each other around the mall, jabbing each other with the sticks based on a cleverly derived point system. Any contact with sword and the chest area will spawn you a point. =D PWAHAHAHAHA so today, if you were at the mall. and saw two crackheads zip past you flailing plastic weapons in the air and screaming, that would've been us. hahahah i love it anyway the song playing right is by 112 it's called Funny Feelings. really depressing but it's a nice song 
.comment ____________________________________________________ Monday, May 24, 2004 / 05:28 a.m. omg i haven't slept yet. omg it's light outside. omg i'm going to bed now. .comment ____________________________________________________ Nooooo Monday, May 24, 2004 / 12:49 a.m. ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! the prom pictures were too big =( n they screwed up my lycos account so a lot of pictures will be little red ex's for a while. GAY!!!!!! =( stupid prom pics. .comment ____________________________________________________ prom Sunday, May 23, 2004 / 01:09 a.m. Notre Dame Prommmmmm Was gay since I know no one from that school but my enjoyment is not the center of the occasion anyhoo so it's all good. it was fun decking out, in any case and congratulations to the grads = ). soo grateful to unnie who did an awesome job on my hair...and especially to john and john's parents for being so generous and inviting me to go... =) going really made me excited for next year...I can't wait till my prom!!! it'd be that much more =D by being around your gradding class, sakdfjalkfjal gonna be awesome. oh ho ho ho and for that math test that i was aiming for 95 on.....scored 99, beetch!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAAY geek power!!! didn't need money to get my hair covered for me though...like i said, sister did a hot job on it hehe   Pictures 1) my hair 2) my hair again 3) johnjohn n me 4) francis n me at QE park 5) group pic 6) heather n me 7) me n francis 8) john john my pretty corsage:  wierd. this song sounds nice, but the lyrics are so depressing....112-funny feelings. "i got funny feelings, funny feelings that you don't love me anymoreeee" frig. i have unfinished business, i really do. I know how much I hate being left in the dark about things, I know how terrible it is to know that something is up and I'm not being let in on it....If I hate it so much, what could possibly make me think that it's okay to do it to someone that I love? It's not okay. to love. to be in love. two different things. Man just so many loose ends that I have to tie up. I think I finally know why I've been so disgruntal this whole week..I've been lost in my own little world...kinda of disregarded everythig else around me. Sometimes, I have to admit...waves of regret come over me...lately, I've been getting pangs of 'did I make a wrong move?'..... but no. I wil lnot let this happen again. In the past...because of my unresolved regret, I made some foolish decisions and dwelled on my regret. Now, when the little sliver of regret comes over me, I think about reality. I've learned that...If you are pushed away, don't push back...if you are pushed away, learn to let go. If you are pushed away, learn to love again to mend yourself and your heart... if you are pushed away, try not to think about what 'could've' or 'would've' been. It's not going to happen, it never will. Because you were pushed away. depressing. =\. it's okay though....I shouldn't be afraid to tie up loose ends. you will look the same. you will talk the same. you will act the same. you will go on living your life normally. you will go on acting like nothing happened. ...but...what will you think......what will you feel...? .comment ____________________________________________________ Saturday, May 22, 2004 / 10:54 a.m. wow first full day of work. never knew a day could go this slow hahaha. every saturdya, i'm going to spend eight hours of my day, eight hours of my extra sleepng in time, eight hours of my bumming time to come here. ...but then again, what am i doing here, exactly? i'm sitting here with a headset on, tapping away at my blog. haha sounds farmiliar....catch is....i'm making money here. sexcellent. prom was yesterday!!! thanks to unnie who came out of her busy workday to come and do my hair =(... things went down pretty much the way i expected them to. it was nice. yerp francis looked so pretty =O anyhoo, notes to self about work: get paid on the 15th and 30th of every month. sexcellent. absolutely sexcellent. i'm going to scavenger on friendster to find myself one of those self-survey things, i'm extremely bored. hahahah i found the perfect titled one, posted by ron: Work's so borin' i have 2 cum on friendster...*sigh* Message: I'M: bored as hell. oh wait, i'm najin -.-. I THINK: that i'm bored. I KNOW: that i'm bored, in fact. I WANT: to be amused. I HAVE: boredom. I WISH: that i could think of something else to say right now other than 'i am bored.' I HATE: being bored. I MISS: not being bored I FEAR: not getting out of my boredom. I HEAR: echo-ish radio in the distance, the sound of footsteps, the sounds of customers talking to retail guys, the sounds of tools slamming into their toolboxes. the sound of boredom!!! I SEARCH: for a cure to my boredom. I WONDER: when exactly, it will be when i stop being bored. I REGRET: all these things hthat happened today to make me this bored. I LOVE: life. life is good. I CARE: not. I'M NOT: unbored. I DANCE: like a lunatic I SING: when i want to I CRY: ..i try not to. I DON'T ALWAYS: ..be this bored. nice grammar, huh. I FIGHT: like a sissy. I WRITE: in my journal. I WIN: always. I LOSE: neevar. bwahah I CONFUSE: myself, sometimes. I LISTEN: i'm listening to the best song riht nowwww..the reason by hoobastank. beautiful song =D I CAN USUALLY BE FOUND: out. home. school. I NEED: to spend money. ...i need to make money first ahahah give me a sec. I'M HAPPY ABOUT: so much. I SHOULD: stop doing this now. i' getting suspicious looks from busy co workers =S bibi .comment ____________________________________________________ epiphany. Wednesday, May 19, 2004 / 11:45 p.m. what the hell am i doing?..... .comment ____________________________________________________ post PMS? Wednesday, May 19, 2004 / 07:34 p.m. ahhhhhhhhh, lately, i'm being such a slug, i'm being such a botch and I know it....but I donno why =S. Excuse my unpleasantness if you ever get to talk to me and find that I am being a complete retard. I'm sorry, I really am. I'd explain myself if I knew what was going on. Things for the rest of the week...I already bought some of the things that I need for friday... Friday's the Notre Dame prom!!!!!!!!! =D =D =D =D =D Only thing up in the air is how I'm gonna do my hair...where the hell i'm going to suck moola to get it done, etc. etc. Another thing for the remainder of the week is my math test =S....funny thing is, those two unfinished things kind of fit in together... if I score 95% or higher on my math test tomorrow, my brother's going to pay to get my hair done!!! BWAHAHA!! and if I score anything lower than...well, anything I'm happy with, I'm going to be pissed off and my hair is going to look like shat on Friday =(. fair enough, eh. The remainder of my week will either be supremely primo or supremely GAY. Soooo, what will it be, Najin? Haha, I'll study my yass off, thank you very much. =D wish me luckkk!! .comment ____________________________________________________ awww.... Sunday, May 16, 2004 / 08:17 p.m. just saw the absolute cutest thing in the world. damn, i'm blessed. damn, you're cute. =D .comment ____________________________________________________ gender bombs. / My past. Discovered you. you were amazing. Went through some irreplaceable things. Fell madly in love. Blinded myself with the bliss that no longer existed, hurt myself in the process. Snapped back to reality. I loved you. You were amazing, you still are amazing. But you are not for me, and that's clear to me now. Then there was you. Something refreshing, something I never thought could be. Good. no, Ideal. No, Perfect. You really don't know what's missing from your life until you take off the blindfold from your eyes. You don't know your needs until you experience the opposite first, then are exposed to your needs firsthand. It will blow you away. Thank you. Thank you for opening my eyes, thank you for showing me what I've been missing, thank you for being you. When I think about it, during the time I was blinded, I felt as if nothing was missing. Reality was, something was desparately missing and it was stealthily killing me. All though I am incredibly thankful for the experience and for what I have gained now, I'm only human. Meaning, I know there is still so much that I can be blind towards, regardless of how complete everything feels to me now. And I realize now, the only constant, the only one who has been never-changing through all this has been God. You deserve so much more than I credit you for. Thank you. AAAAnyway, the song playing: Gender Bombs by The Stills. Check the lyrics out: brains on a brick wall when gender bombs they fall the sordid way her loaded phrases infiltrate your skull the images are strong impulses are strong and logic will break your heart forever be brave massive suicide dreams the feel long and warm the girl will school you the girl will... could this be the gaining force of ten loves in a row drunken sunday evenings will just be innuendos massive suicide dreams that feel long and warm the girl will school you the girl will school you the girl will school you the girl will school you the girl will school you the girl will school you the girl will school you the girl will school you the girl will school you the girl will school you .comment ____________________________________________________ weary. Saturday, May 15, 2004 / 05:02 p.m. don't ask why, i feel very weary with everything. i shoudl really get aroudn to stepping it up though... step it up step it up step it upsfsiofpisapfasfisafas. i'll get aroudn to it. i'm sad, i want to go do somthing today =(. that wouldn't be too good of an idea though, 'll get hunted down and keeled. got a job at richmond motor sports!! yessssssssssss cash flow is going to be no more at zero!! holy hell there is so much crap that i want...not necessarily need, bt want want watnwntnantwnatnnt. =) money can't buy you happiness but it can buy najin happiness....temporarily of course, but let's see how long i can go with the help of money =D. yae. yae yaeyaeyaeyaye. ewwwwwwwww my fencing bruise is turning yellow! HAHaha GROSS!! but hey, i got a fencing bruise! HWAHAhaha do not ask why, but i am proud of it. lol. i rock. anyway okay this will be my schedule for the rest of the day. holy hell it's all ready 5 o clock?!?! aww =( what a wasted day. whatever, that's okay. lala ok i got some work to finish. i'll do that by 7 or 8. or nine even =S. i feel like company =(. ill get some homos to come over and entertain me after then. restful. unstressful. excellent...ful. =) prom on friday!!! aHHHH I MUST DECIDE!!!::: www.promhairstyles.org haha so much krap on that page. anyway, as far as that goes, i've foudn three hairstyles that i am equally feeling.:    hmm I'm going to combine all of those to make to satisfy me. hehe okay so i'll use the side part with the side bang coming down, i'll leave it half down, and the part that's up will be crazily twisted with a few small braids coming out the back too. there. a combination of the three =) yayyyyy, it will look pretty .comment ____________________________________________________ excellent. Thursday, May 13, 2004 / 10:33 p.m. haha i was so tired yesterday that after i changed the layout of this page i didn't even get to write about it or anything. i was really ready to collapse. anyhoo i'll take the time to talk a little bit about itt nowwwwww hehe. well that picture up there ^. with the braiids...that was taken in spring break...march 19th to be exact...which is actually a very special day for me. heh for reasons.....that...yes. =). dum dee dum... anyhoo yayyyyyyyy got a job at richmond motor sports now!!! that place is heaven, i tell you. the desk i sit at is literally the center point that allllllll the bikes surround. sure it gets a little nerve wracking, a little butt numbing, but being in the midst of all these bikes couldn't be more worth it. excellent. =) the next few weeks are going to be hectic that's for sure. hectically fun!!!! BNWAHAHHAA .comment ____________________________________________________ hmm... Wednesday, May 12, 2004 / 11:51 p.m. i felt like crap today. premium crap. amazing crap. extravagant crap. you really can't make crap sound good, can you? lol. crap is crap. man, completely bombed the math test i got back today. but of course what is 'bombing' a test, right? haha when i say bombed, i mean anything that falls short of the ridiculous expectations i've set for myself. asians are such dorks hahaha. *pushes glasses up with finger* i dont' know anymore. what is it that i dont' know anymore? a lot....i feel like my original objectives have kinda gone hazy from the grand scheme of things. i gotta get my priorities straight....there once was a solid, outspoken line..now replaced with some wonky, unsure one. so much has happened in the past little while, so much more than i ever thought could happen. everything is meshing together... all i'm left with is....never say never. you can fall in love again...it is possible. amazing, ain't it? blows me away too, i know...all you have to do is let yourself. let go of the unecessary. keep the past as the past. keep memories as memories. keep lessons you learned. embrace the present, dream about the future. no regrets= ) take some risks. ....but wouldn't it be so reassuring if you know whether or not the risk would be worth it or not? hell nooooo! take some risks if you're up for the unpredictable. unpredictable don't sound promising to you? you don't know till you try...you really don't. .comment ____________________________________________________ Friday, May 7, 2004 / 11:53 a.m. ahhhhhhhhh and so the weekend begins =D. ahhh okay...today shall be good, but for the rest of the weekend, it's crunch time and i seriously have to get back to work...been slacking way too much lately. =) okay okay okay oakyoakyoakyoakyoakyoakyay. i have many things to do before i leave, goodbye children, i hope you have a good weekend =) the weather for the weekend in the lower mainland is apparantly supposed to be a mix of sun and cloud. yayer. .comment ____________________________________________________ ARCHIVES . |
