np: Ano Uchi ni Kaerou - Chara Longish rant just to make me personally feel better. *curls up* I just got a really depressing email...it did make me think, but not about something I really haven't before. *sigh* She's nicer than me, is all... *siiigh* When I don't like a person, it isn't that I don't show it at all. But I always extend common courtesy to them. As long as they aren't someone who's absolutely terrible (there really isn't anyone like that I see everyday), I still smile at them, wave at them, and say hello even if I don't like them. Because I just don't like treating people badly; and at least that way I know the reason we don't get along isn't all my fault. *shrug* If it's a person where our personalities just happen to clash (which is what I mean; rather than someone I genuinely dislike ^^;), that's fine- I'll be nice to them and just try not to interact with them to much, lest I get myself into trouble. Actually, all my friends are pretty much like that (except for perhaps Rocchan, but I've already said I can't figure her out a lot of the time). But anyway...the point is that there's been a person who hangs around us, and she just thought all of us were great friends. But actually, it seems a lot of people didn't like her; and those that used to like her just got hurt, so they don't anymore. I, personally, distanced myself from the entire situation at the beginning of the year; because I didn't want to deal with this girl. =_= So anyway, I think the girl in question has finally caught on. >_>;; I'd feel sorry for her, but staying on the outside of it I saw how she treated my friends like dirt constantly. *sigh* So I just got a mail from a slightly less-involved friend, and basically she told the lot of us (x_x including some people not involved at all- hell, out of the five that got the mail I can only say maybe one person *ought* to have gotten it...only two others *know* what this is about, for goodness sakes) we were being a bunch of elitist snobs, trying to shut her out of our own "clique". And...I don't know. >_>;;; I just feel really upset by this, because a part of me is wondering if I'm really partly to blame. (=_= As I don't interact with or talk to this girl outside of, "Hi, good morning," each day anymore, though...she's only in my art class...) Well, I'm sure I'm -somehow- responsible, but I was the only one even making a slight effort to be nice as my friends were talking about her behind her back (She deserved it, by the way- she had been really rude, but that's besides the point. =_= The point I was trying to make was that she probably hadn't done it on purpose.)...but I'm dreading school tomorrow, because I wouldn't be suprised if this blows up somehow. On the worst possible week, too. The point though, is that I don't think I'm that heavily involved in this, and I was really hurt by that email because while it encouraged the whole group of us snobs to be direct, it didn't directly say who she thought was at fault, even. I'd like to say to myself, "This has nothing to do with me," but it probably does somewhat, and I don't doubt that it will extend to me. (As far as "excluding" a person from a group thing, I can only say I've directly done that maybe once (just because they were a person I didn't like). *sigh* And that's a completely different thing, and yes I do feel guilty about it.) But the big problem with this is that I've honestly never had a problem like this within my circle of friends. Honestly, until this year I never had a "circle" of friends (and in that I mean ones who I'm around all the time ^_^;;). Ali and I've been together since middle school, and we're just a pair that sticks together. Last year we had Jessica and Allyson around us, but...well, still Ali and I sat on one side of the table and Allyson and Jessica sat on the other, shall we say. ^^; But this year, suddenly we've got over ten people hanging around us as a group constantly. I'm not used to it. I'm used to it being me and Ali, and we just don't have big, visible and loud problems. In four years we've only had one real fight that lasted over a day, and I can only count one time I was sincerely angry at something she's done, and only one time she really hurt me deeply. *shrug* But suddenly there's all these *people*, and we do all get along pretty well, but...if we're going to have a huge group arguement over this, I don't even want to know what's gonna happen...I just don't want to lose any friends over this. =_= I don't think this whole thing is even about "cliques" or "sub-cliques", though. It's a matter of knowing exactly who your close friends are- because even if you have a bunch of friends, there's still a close few you keep dearest to your heart because of something you've been through together. I have maybe two or three friends (around school/weekend trips ^_^;) I consider as friends I love very deeply, and there are a few others I adore muchly. And usually, you're able to find those few and latch onto them as your support and love all through your days. But I think that one girl just never found a someone like that, and just kept messing up her chances for it. And now it's the end of the year, and she maybe realized that she doesn't have a friend like that here. And that's a feeling that really deeply hurts- to be in a place with nobody you could turn to in a pinch. I know; I've been there. =_= Anyway, I'm personally still very hurt by what was said and very upset, so I'm just going to stay up and finish that project which I wasn't even planning to finish till lunch tomorrow. I don't think I'm getting much sleep tonight...I just feel sick. And as much as I'm dreading that PA trip, I figure it can't be much worse than the hell of my school nowadays. ~_~ Grades and finals are enough to deal with in these last two weeks- I don't know if I can handle it if my friends are at each others' throats too. I'll just have to wait till tomorrow to see how mature the other two people directly involved are going to be. I want nothing more than for it to be past finals, and for the whole lot of us to throw one huge anime marathon sleepover celebration. I don't like this entire situation already- but at least I only technically have a window of five days where I'm forced to be involved. >_<; I guess I'll figure out if any of this is my fault if I get dragged into it against my will. *snort* The traumatic days of high school. Geh... Monday, May 21, 2001 12:10 a.m. np: White Reflection - Two-Mix PLAY. IS. DONE~!!! XD (It's terrible, but it's seven pages and only had to be three, so I guess that counts for something.) All that is left are the poems~!! And I decided the health project can wait until tomorrow- I just need to visit a few websites and read up on my subject again. :3 I dunno if I'll finish the English project tonight, but I'll try. XD The end of Digimon aired yesterday in the US. I'm getting so sick of the fics. >_<; On the yaoi MLs- yes, you heard me... >_<;; I can't believe anyone would be so freaking stupid as to think Yamato would ever divorce Sora. Not a chance in hell- he'd never put his kids through what he went through as a kid. He'd rather kill himself inside than divorce her. >_>;; If it bothers people that much, why don't they just ignore the canon? =_=;; Or alter it. In the fic I need to finish someday, I went so far as to take the events of the Tegami dramas but just took the Sorato out of them (and the Tegami dramas are nothing *but* Sorato~). XD; But Yamato x Sora doesn't even bother me that much, sadly. n_n;; You'd catch me hissing and screaming over Ken x Miyako before Yamato x Sora...in the case of Yamato x Sora, I just like Taito better. And I'll just ignore the canon which disappointed me anyway. o_O; And the idea of Daisuke x Jun from my MLs is one I could have done without. o____O;;; Anyway. Should go find poems. Sunday, May 20, 2001 07:41 p.m. np: I'm Your Friend - Gundam Wing Sooo...I have a day to write three pages of play, write long analyzations of a couple poems, and write a few more poems in the imitation of a poet. After I'm done with that, I also have to go and review that oral report I made last year to use it again for health tomorrow. Yoooosh. With the help of hypergenki songs, I! Shall! Prevail~! XD Ohohoho~!! Once again proving that I am the procrastination QUEEEN~!! XD XD XD Oh, and I really really like April's new layout. XD Pretty picture~! (It looks fine to me on Netscape, BTW. XD) Sunday, May 20, 2001 12:54 p.m. np: Bokura no Digital World - Digimon 02 ;__; I just got around to downloading this...it's beautiful. It's the song that played (or maybe the karaoke version of it, I only remember that the intro was incredible) in the background in the final episode, when it goes to that shot of the earth. And... ;__; It somehow seems like more of an "end" to the series than that pathetic excuse of a final episode did. The song's verses are sung by Maeda Ai and Wada Kouji (and they sing beautifully together; I wish they'd done more duets~!!!) and the chorus is sung by the entire cast...in between, each child and then their Digimon says, "Arigatou!" or some other cute thing... But Yamato and Taichi go first, and Yamato just murmurs in this drop-dead-sexy voice, "Kimi ga ita kara..." and it just sounded so...TAITO. XD I swear that if they had just dumped the future bit, and put together a montage of all the children and their Digimon set to -this- song, it could have been a lovely ending. ;-; It just sums up the entire series as a whole. (Lyrics are here...) Saturday, May 19, 2001 12:55 p.m. np: Friend~Itsumademo Wasurenai - Digimon 02 I. LOVE. THIS. SONG. XD Anyone who loves cute happy songs should listen. It's not really genki, just...happy. XD Strikes me as a song to sing at a gradutation. "Arigatou, sorezore no michi no dokoka de kitto...kono mune no naka arukidaseru. Soba ni ite yo, friend. Haretetemo, my friend..." Saturday, May 19, 2001 11:58 a.m. np: Journey - Rurouni Kenshin (KYAA. XD "Hen desu yo ne, Shishio-san~<3~?" I repeat, KYAAA. XD) And suddenly, in block five English, it came to me as we were discussing our projects due on Monday. Meimi: *dreamily* My play can be my backstory. Ali: O_O Meimi: Write play. Write backstory. Two birds with one stone. XD Ali: I hate you. >_>; Meimi: Wish you'd thought of it, huh? XD Ali: As I begin my ninth attempt at my play... >_>;;; Friday, May 18, 2001 08:56 p.m. np: Tsuki to Amai Namida - Chara A person can change a great deal during the day. It's quite interesting. For example, this morning I had a 40% chance of getting to the Expo, and about ten hours later (in those hours, I had cackled to all friends about how it was possible) I was at the Not On Your Life, Not A Chance In Hell stage and had plummetted down to .0000000001%. >_>; Datte. ><; Ikitakatta no. But I'm not gonna, because I have to go to PA. >_<; The last few summers there (particularly last summer) were sheer hell. I love my aunt and uncle and baby cousin from New York, but we never see them...I really wish we did, because my aunt is just an amazing and wonderful person. She actually treats me like a person while I'm there (and last summer actually took me shopping and supported my search for Yamato merchandise ^^;), and seems to respect and expect that I've changed in the past year-to-six-months. But no, not anybody else. >.>; My grandparents and I just don't have the best of relationships anymore, because my grandfather and I ceased getting along once I hit the teenage years and actually felt like speaking my mind once in a while. Last year the dinner table got into some historical debates and I decided to get involved, and completely shot down his arguement. >_>; He was a poor sport and refused to speak to me for days, and I got yelled at to apologize to him. (For speaking my mind during a debate. XP And yes, I was quite polite and until he stopped talking to me, 'Kaasan said she was very proud. =_=) He's also veeery hard of hearing and has been for years, but is too stubborn to get hearing aids. Unfortunately this also means I get yelled at constantly, whether he means to or not. >_<;; So I tend to run upstairs when he's downstairs, and run downstairs when he's upstairs, and then I get yelled at by 'Kaasan about being antisocial/rude. I wish she'd figure out (for both there and here) it's NOT a matter of being antisocial, it's a matter of being sick of being screamed at everywhere I go. I'm not antisocial. >_<; (Though I'll admit some of my friends are, so I get dragged into the whole thing against my will. XD But I try, really I do~) *siiiigh* Last year he only got back on good terms with me after he pushed the car seat back on my foot, which was (naturally) quite infected at the time. Scared the hell out of him to see me bleeding everywhere- otherwise I don't think he'd have spoken to me the rest of the trip. *grimances* So I end up escaping to my cousins' house, where Nina is and I love her. But the entire family screams at each other, and! >_<;; I! Get! Sick! Of! The! SCREAMING! However, the plus is that nobody screams at -me-. >_>;;; I'm getting a headache thinking about it. >_<;;; In any case, it's gonna be one fun summer...*scowl* With luck, it'll actually turn out even worse than last year's trip. Which would be a trick, but it doesn't strike me as impossible. Friday, May 18, 2001 05:19 p.m. XD XD XD Meimi has a 40% chance of getting to AX this yeaaaar~~<3~~!! *_* I actually don't think I'm -really- going, but the possibility is open and that's all I wanted. XD I feel kind of badly because it all depends on if I can go with someone else, and that someone else is probably Leslie...and I don't like asking to go...even though she implied before I might be able to... o.O Maaaaa ne. If I can't I can't, but I am most certainly gonna try my hardest. XD Ga-n-ba-ru~! Kix to issho ni kaimono suru tame ni ne~!! XD Friday, May 18, 2001 09:46 a.m. np: Gravitation - 'Gravitation' theme (Gorgeous instrumental. *Gorgeous*. *_*) Hm...had elections in anime club today. Ali and I were re-elected (suprise, suprise- nobody else but us can) and Tara and Geri are going to work together as treasurers and fundraising officers...I, however, was thiiiiiiis close from losing my temper with Livia...after several months ago, being informed that our pathetic club was far below her, I've just been annoyed as all hell to hve her show up at meetings these past few weeks and yell over us. And today I had to listen to her list of a bunch of suggestions for a club she's attended three meetings to- damnit we'd at least tried every single thing she suggested at one point in the year or another. >_< Mou. But at least now I know I'm not the only one who finds her difficult to deal with. =_= Still...I know it's awful to think I won't be sorry to see her go. Every other exchange student this year I became incredibly good friends with...I'm going to lose a lot of close friends. Things are going to be lonely next year. But she's not really someone I can bring myself to miss- she's snobby, conceited, tactless, and rude. >_>; In the beginning of the year I tried really hard to see what was going wrong, because I figured she couldn't be so bad if Rocchan was such good friends with her. But Rocchan...isn't anymore, it seems. =_= And I guessed the ending of the "Friends" finale earlier on today, but Oh My God I was still O_____O;;; ...I thought Monica and Chandler ought to have had the spotlight in the end, though. *pout* I actually think last year's finale was more romantic...it was so pretty, especially the ending bit when they danced...but oh well. ^^; Thursday, May 17, 2001 11:42 p.m. np: Koi wa Konran - Himiko-den (I LOVE this song XD XD XD It's sooo catchy without being annoying~) Came back from Fine Arts night. Was fun, though the fact we hadn't had a practice with everyone present was really obvious. XP Stacey and I have one scene where we exchange quick dialogue that's really similar, and when she was gone in practice I did it all for her since I knew it. And suddenly I had this problem (which I always used to have, but it was now a lot worse) of seperating her lines from mine. XD In practice she made one amusing messup- the real line is "The teachers were able to see that the real Cinderella was not the little girl with the button nose and the brown hair, but..." Stacey: ...the real Cinderella was not the little girl with the button hair and the brown nose............wait. >.>; Us: ... XD XD XD I also made my first amusing messup on stage. XD; I accidentally messedup the bit in one scene and said Claudia's nose was cement. ^^;; Though we were walking offstage and Kirsten says, "Is this the last scene? Oh, SHIT~!" right onstage. XD XD XD I thought it was funny... And I got to read the pancake mission bit when we were waiting backstage. *fufufu* And Ali lied about her character- he's being all yaoi-ish with Leslie's after all (well, those faint s-ai hints that are enough to make any fangirls scream o_o). They remind me faintly of Taichi and Yamato. But not really. =.= I'd say Duo and Heero, but Perth isn't enough like Duo. XD Leslie and Ali both think it's funny but really Wrong. But Ali thinks it's even more Wrong now that she got invited to be a prom date twice now for two different girls in our group (they wanted to cut her hair short and dress her up like a guy). o_O; First Daisy suggested it for, I think Rocchan's date...and then Leslie was wondering who to take to her prom and Leslie's mom said... XD;;;; I mean yeah, they were both joking but it's kinda scary they both made the same suggestion, no? XD Anyway. >.>; I must go play with layout. Rocchan didn't mail me the picture, and I didn't want to use her picture actually. >_< I wanted something scannable that I could freely edit and work with. *pout* I'm gonna just sketch something out quick and make a temp layout for it. But~ I get the idea she doesn't like me drawing. =_= I showed her two sketches from today and got "Mm, good," on the one of Alyse's and then I showed hers and I got shrieks of, "MY WAIST IS NOT THAT SMALLLL~~!" and she fled. >< I just draw them that way because I like the look of it...oh well. Wednesday, May 16, 2001 10:39 p.m. np: Fukai Mori - Inuyasha (Pretty. More Sesshou-maru than the song. XD) Meimi: *still on costume whining* I don't need a whole new OUTFIT, I just want cute trim or a nice accesory! Ali: You can have an accessory if you write a backstory for one like everyone else has. Meimi: XO I can't come UP with an idea for a backstory~! Because I don't WANT an angsty backstory! Ali: Then..don't write an angsty one. Meimi: YOU try coming up for an idea for a backstory that isn't an angst trip. Ali: ... =_= I asked Rocchan about the outfit, saying I wanted something "cute" and she went >_> at me and asked if I wanted a "poofy skirt and ribbons". I said not necessarily, but can I have a skirt? "No." ^^; I finally saw the closeup of my character today. XO She looks like...like the early Shusuran!! Only MUCH less cute and more like a guy (and not a cute one). >.>; Everyone else has pretty girls and cute guys. XP But in the case of those poor guys, Rocchan got desperate for a yaoi outlet in the series and... (Ali: "*shriek* THAT!!! THAT!!! THAT'S *INCEST*~~~!!!") ...but Ali isn't letting her go with it, I don't think. XD;; Instead they made two other guys from the other team a yaoi couple...I'm looking forward to reading the pancake mission for them, because they're quite cute together. XD (In that "DIE!" kind of way...actually their personalities remind me of a more violent version of human Suppi and Kero. XD;; Especially at the point where they start forcing pancakes down each other's throats...) The pancake mission is just an excuse for them to write the real-life story as the characters, though. XD It does somehow seem more amusing this way, though the way it happened in real life was cute enough. ^^ Wish I'd been there... ;-; They have all the FUN at temple. XP Wednesday, May 16, 2001 04:45 p.m. Shiori-chan, gomen ne. =_=;;; 'Kaasan appeared suddenly and I had to run for my life- she was FURIOUS at me. Apparently yesterday I was supposed to be waiting -outside- for her. *snort* She was worried to death, it seems. Gee. If she'd been "missing" for two hours, I would have checked first the PLACE SHE ALWAYS GOES AFTER SCHOOL. >_>;;; Geez. The problem is that I'm sometimes reluctant to admit I'm wrong, and she will never-ever, not-till-hell-freezes-over admit SHE was ever wrong. And all I could think of was how she dumps me after school for two or three hours and I, damnit, do not refuse to talk to her for the rest of the fucking night. If it were in my power to make her do so, I would also not send her to clean the house, nor would I ground her. Usually, when she's angry at me I get all depressed and spend the night crying a little bit and hating myself, but last night I was just angry. I ended up going to bed around six PM because I was just sick of death of dealing with her, and while I wanted to point out the above point of how many times I'VE been put in here place often WEEKLY...I knew it would just get turned around on me. So I kept my mouth shut and went to bed. *sourly* Of course this morning I got a lecture about being an ungrateful little brat who doesn't know how to respect or appreciate her mother working-herself-into-the-ground. Like hell I don't. Oh, and I got a 96% on my math test, but 'Kaasan doesn't chalk it up to the fact that I fucking locked myself in my room and studied nonstop for three days. Oh no. "It was because I went in and gave that teacher a piece of my mind." I can't wait till school is over. I'm getting so -sick- of dealing with everything that relates back to my family that's school-related. Whether it's Aniki failing every subject, or my math or human anatomy grades...I've just sick of it, and I'm sick of being treating like crap everywhere I go no matter how hard I try to be a nice person. It wouldn't matter who I am, I would neeeever be good enough for 'Kaasan (who of course loves me just the way I am, I'm sure XP)...she wonders why I spend so much time in my room? Because every time I get near her, I get kicked around. >_<; My grades aren't good enough! I'm forgetful and can't find an envelope that's in front of my face! I'm not pretty enough! (And the everything-but-spoken one is "Why can't you be more like Ali when you two are such good friends?") And you know, I like myself pretty well until I get reminded by her about what a supposed screw-up I am. I'm just not a perfectionist, and the reason I'm not is 'cause I know Ali. And she is (no matter what she says) and she doesn't really act like she likes herself at all. I'd rather keep on trying to be a better -person- as I am, than aim to be perfect, 'cause I don't even wanna be. =_= I just want to keep on trying to be a better and nicer friend, and do well in school where it suits me, but not let it swallow up my life. And I just want to be like that, and if I know I'm really trying that hard, I just want everyone else (='Kaasan) to leave me the hell alone. >_<; I don't try any harder by being told I'm not good enough for her. Because most of the time, I'm really good enough for me, and that's what matters the most. I know kids who just get treated like their parents' puppets, even if it isn't in their best interest. And I just want to be a person that I'm happy with, but that isn't necessarily 'Kaasan's image of the model child. XP 'Cause if I tried to fix everything "wrong" with me at once, I'd die. XD And everything she thinks is "wrong" with me is not necessarily something I think is a bad thing, you know~? Grades I just try my hardest, it's a little late to worry about not being pretty enough for her, and I *actually* would like to be able to fix that problem of not finding the envelope in front of my face but there isn't much I can do to work on that skill. XD Wednesday, May 16, 2001 07:32 a.m. @.@; ...I'm dead tired. It's five and now my two and a half hours of sleep have caught up with me. *halfhearted cackle* I'm gonna go home, take a nap, and work on our group blog if I happen to wake up. And Rocchan said I could design my own character's clothes however I wanted, but she still has to look like a boy and wear boy-ish clothes basically. =_= It's very strange. Whenever I'm around people who don't speak perfect English, I start talking like them too. XD; Two minutes into a conversation, I will suddenly switch randomly what tense I'm speaking in and things like that. I don't know why- maybe I just get so used to hearing it... XP Tuesday, May 15, 2001 05:14 p.m. I feel somewhat tired. @__@;; I was really thinking, you know, around 4AM, "Should I even BOTHER?" but decided two hours of sleep (technically stretched into three hours ^_~) was better than none at all. Did get to talk to Tin-chama, and I can't even remember the last time we did that- it's been months and months. ^^ Also downloaded some new random video clips...hrm. Well, I'd seen Sesshou-maru's DESIGN for the Inuyasha anime, but oh my GOD. XD XD XD XD XD I downloaded the new ending, which is little else but him looking REALLY REALLY angsty and pretty. H_H ...I find it impossible to believe he could ever be mistaken for a girl in the anime. H___H Was too late to turn up the volume, but the song sounded okay, though I liked My will better. Weeell, I have nine more days of school, and then finals. Very, very scary. @___@;;; I must do fabulously on the rat practicum test today in human anatomy, because if I flunk out of it I'm dead. *buries head in hands* And those two weeks to drag my algebra grade up from the rotting pits of hell. XD But. To all those along with me, trying desperately to make it through these last couple weeks alive- ganbatte~!! XD Kitto dekiru yoooon~! And Jin! XD You're alive. Wai~! Can I expect more vampirefic sooon~? XD Or~? Taichi: *_* You still haven't forgotten about that? Meimi: *cackles* Once summer hits! I shall send MILLIONS of Taitobunnies to Jin~! XD So much that she shall!! write!! that Taito lemon~!! XD ...well, I'm looking forward to vampirefic, anyway! XD Want more, yeees~? Tuesday, May 15, 2001 07:40 a.m. np: Toki no Kioku - Please Save My Earth I feel badly for giving myself only three hours of sleep when I have such a big day tomorrow. XP But Leslie asked a looooong time ago exactly why Subaru wanted Sei-chan to kill him. T_T Just the given reason isn't good enough for her, and since we've debated over it. But while I have a very firm standpoint on this...I somehow can't write it out coherantly. ^^;;;;; So since it's two AM, suddenly my thoughts righted themselves and I pounded out this mini-essay on how messed-up the two of them are. =_=;; It'll probably be sent back as not good enough, but oh well. ^^;; It seems fairly brilliant at 2:30 AM. XD But hey. Anything does. Tuesday, May 15, 2001 02:37 a.m. np: Lively Motion - Hayashibara Megumi *fumes* Doushite atashi no kyara dake wa kawaii fuku NAI NO YOooooOOO~?! ><;; Is this everyone's revenge against me for always wearing dressy clothes when we go out while they're in jeans?!! ;___; Monday, May 14, 2001 10:17 p.m. np: A*I*TSU - GALS! *heart* I called the pharmacy and they gave me the info I needeeeeed. So I already wrote a page of current events info, and I just need to decode the meaning of the pamphlet for the next two pages. ^_^ I'm not worried. ;_; I was gonna pay for the MB tapes myself, but I think I'm going to ask club to chip in after all. Eh well...it's $15 I need. XP I might register my domain next week. I'm not sure. Oh, and the GALS! anime is soo funny. XD It's just amazing fun to watch animated...I'm downloading the second half of episode three now. *_* I wonder if they show the Miyu flashback of her meeting Yamato there...I love how cute Miyu is. XD Aya used to be my favorite character, but suddenly I understood why everyone gets annoyed by her and I was, too. =_=;; My favorite character in the series is Mamirin, though. XD I can't wait to get to her part in the series...but it's SO fun just to watch. The voices are perfect (especially Miyu's~~~<3), the animation is suprisingly good, and it's just hilarious to watch. XD The only thing that annoys me is the BGM they use for Ran's Inspirational Life-Changing Speeches...they come off sounding really stupid that way, and in the manga it was scenes and speeches like that, that made me like Ran so much. ^^ Back to project and listening to this song on loop. ^^; Monday, May 14, 2001 06:52 p.m. np: A*I*TSU - GALS! So here I am...starting my human anatomy project the day before it's due. x_x I'm wondering how far I can get just on BSing it, but my teacher is horribly smart. *sob* She's one of those rare teachers who can recognize it when you have no idea what you're talking about. At least the visual half looks nice. *heart* Now I just need to write three pages of craaap~! Monday, May 14, 2001 12:29 p.m. np: Dive Into Shine - Lastier =_= Waiting for the rest of Ali-tachi to mail me back...I was whining that we should have a cute name for our group (like CCi-tachi or something! XD) because I'm sick of calling everyone Ali-tachi. So now we're Hellfire-gumi. =_=;; I wanted...something cute...or evil...in a cute way. Anyway, I think we're planning on getting a group blog...I suggested it and Ali set up a pitas account, but I'm trying to convince them that blogger would be better for a group blog. ><; But alas! Nobody's mailing me back. =_= (Not like anyone beyond Ali would understand the difference between the two, but still XP) I need a NAME for it before I set it up...and I want to set it up. Because I think Ali uses MS Paint, meaning she doesn't really design graphics. The title graphic at her page made me want to cry when I saw it. ;_; And the picture is resized to less than half its proper width. *bangbang head* And she learned HTML from our school's class, where the teacher himself is horrible at web design *shudder*...I already knew the entire course material when I took it, so I was safe. =_= So anyway. I either need to ask her for a picture, or ask for a character description, or ask Rocchan for a picture. I want it to be pretty thus I wanna do it. >.>;; I'm so spoiled and bitchy sometimes. ^^;; Times like this, I really see I haven't completely outgrown that six-year-old on the playground in pigtails and saddle shoes, telling everyone around her that it's HER way or NO way. ^^; Speaking of blogs, Shiori-chan, think we could start up SB sometime soon? ^^ Sunday, May 13, 2001 07:41 p.m. np: Kibou no Sora he - Evangelion And suddenly, I'm beginning to feel slightly tired. o.O At least thanks to Amichi I got made some progress on the project of doom. XD The site you gave me had a pic of the pill, which was what I really needed- I'm going to play with the visual part of the project a lot in paintshop. Shiori-chan, I'm starting to understand your fear of Napster. Now everytime I'm on, someone tries to download "Ashita Moshi Kimi ga Kowaretemo" by WANDS from me. o.O I've no idea why I'm not dead tired. >.>;; I didn't get sufficient sleep last night, and here it is: 3 AM and I'm only vaguely sleepy. I'm sleepier than this at eleven on school nights. XP I'm gonna go see if Neesan drifted off downstairs, and if she didn't I'm going to go watch my PSME DVD again and fall asleep. ^o^ And I ordered the MB tapes today, and I'm getting the money order tomorrow. So it looks like I will not suffer death at the hands of my club (though I opted for Gravi for me, rather than the beginning Kei eps. ;_; Oh well. I'll have eight tapes now, which is a decent amount for a series like MB, I guess. ^^;) But....Keiiii... ;____; I only got the one where he acually first appears in the beginning- then I skipped to the Christmas ep. =.= Oh well. Maybe I'll try to dig up enough money for those in a few weeks... Sunday, May 13, 2001 02:41 a.m. np: A*I*TSU - GALS! Addictive...song... *_* Probably would get annoying if you haven't seen the sequence, tho. Want "Dakishimetai". ><;; But the single isn't out till the 25th...I might order it because I really, really like the song. Jin, as I glimpsed you for a split second tonight, are you back online or no? o.O And Shannako, I'm certain he beats yours. *snort* Luckily I barely even talk to him- you know, I think we've had one conversation over two sentences in the past four years. o.O; I dunno. I've always been able to see how he manipulates everyone else in the family...and I just don't want it to happen to me. 'Kaasan says, "He knows I love him, so he takes that love, and twists it around to hurt me...and so he can't get hurt back." I guess I just never wanted to get close enough to let him even think I loved him, so he wouldn't do it to me...rather, he thinks I loathe him. XP I don't, really.......but I don't trust him, and when I see how he treats 'Kaasan and John like trash, it sincerely makes me want to beat the crap out of him. (>.> If we were close enough to be safe to argue, I would have tried it already...) But I don't hate him....I'm just of the opinion that he needs to have someone forcing strong disciplinary methods on him and making him act less immature. XP And make him realize that no, colleges will not excuse your GPA of some scary low number just because you're a decent track runner. =_= I think he checked the "please send me college information" box on the PSAT but actually *believes* that not only can he can get into all the colleges that send him stuff...but they shall chase after him and beg him, the Almighty Track Player (who got picked to run -alternate- on the team this year at the big competition =_=) to puh-leaaaase run for them. Ladida. Two more days left on the project, haven't started it. But the visual is *half* the grade. ^^; And I decided exactly what I want to do...and so I just need to call up the pharmacy and ask a few questions about my drug. Blah. >.>;;; Sunday, May 13, 2001 01:00 a.m. np: Awai Kaze - Magic Knight Rayearth Aniki is possibly the stupidest boy I've ever met in my entire life. >_<;;;; Aniki: *who, for some reason thinks that colleges asking for his track scores will beg for him with scholarships, despite his GPA*....*thoughtfully* You know, I don't think I want to be an engineer. Neesan: ...... John: ....mm. Aniki: *ponders* Maybe I'll go into computer science. (Never touched a computer in his life, by the way.) Neesan, John: ................ They're too nice to him. >_>; Yes, I do realize that in three years he's managed to screw over his ENTIRE future. But why should they be nice about it?!! It's his own fault, because they've loved him and sent him to the schools he wanted and been supportive and done everything asked of them and more. And yet! He managed to screw up time and time again!! >_<;; I'm sorry, but I was the only one who saw four years ago when we moved in, what an absolute jerk he was. I remember I used to get yelled at for not even trying to get close to him. Well...I can't help how I've always felt about him. I just knew right off the bat, by intuition, that I didn't trust him. =_= It's not something I'm proud of or worked hard to do! I just knew I didn't like him, and didn't trust him. And I still don't....and suddenly, two and a half years later, the rest of my family suddenly started listening to me. And gasp, because he's been making a mess of his life (like I kept mentioning to them), basically he's got no chance at college now. He just ruined it this semester- he's flunking every class. *scowl* Oh, and he's two months behind on insurance payments to 'Kaasan on the car he demanded HER buy, he still won't talk to his mother (who gleefully screwed up my entire family's lives since the moment we've moved here, and he's never said a word to her) to stop her from doing things like, oh, bitching at MY mother over the phone or filing with him as her tax deduction when he ISN'T....and his room is the ugliest, messiest place I've ever seen (he doesn't have a single thing hung up in the closet and has more clothes than me and John put together >_<;)... Now, they STILL won't listen to me. Personally, I say throw everything in his room out the window (his window opens up into our backyard and lay a tarp down out there- tada! he'll take better care of the room thereafter), ground him from all privilages till he gets his grades up. But nobody listens to me. XD Saturday, May 12, 2001 05:42 p.m. np: Sakura kara Issei he - Please Save My Earth I have this horrible longing to make another PSME layout and label it, "JINPACHI YOU FREAKING *IDIOT*". >_>; I finally broke down and bought the DVD today- I've been drooling over it for months. ^^; I'd never seen the first two eps, anyhow (somehow I only caught it at repeat showings of the last four O.o which I've seen pleeeenty of times), though I knew them basically by heart... ^^ And of course along with my rewatching it, my desire to throttle Jinpachi to death was rekindled...I like him. I really do, seriously. XD He just drives me crazy and he's too dense. He needs a good smack across the head...or twenty. But that DVD seems *so* long- it was definitely worth the money. I only watched three and a half episodes before 'Kaasan kicked me out, and it felt like five. o.O Or longer. ...Issei is my favorite character, but watching him kind of suprises me every time I watch him. He just gets...so...*feminine* in his facial expressions and stuff. Especially in that scene with Sakura. XD;; I think he's more girly than she is, honestly... I dunno. Issei and Sakura are my favorites- but I don't like them as a couple. >__<;;; Part of it is that I wanted things with Jinpachi to work out, and the other part is that Issei and Sakura just seem like **friends**. No matter how much they talk about being different, I get the idea when they're together, that they talk exactly like they did on the moon. Like two best friends. (Or hell, even sisters.) I have this image of Shusulan and Enju painting each other's nails and trading jewelry with each other. =_=;;; It's just too damn weird to think of them married...Sakura just seems to act like the big-sister figure too much. ^^;; Friday, May 11, 2001 08:17 p.m. Nya, this was more accurate than Megan, I think. XD MEIMI: From the Chinese root meaning "Licker of Toads" Characteristics: Meimi knows nothing about anything. Personality: Meimi should never baby-sit. (Hell yes. ^^) Natural: Meimi likes sheep a great deal. (Did my sheep bedset and my cackles at Asapin give it away? XD) Emotional: Meimi shouldn't get riled up... (Nyaha.) Character: Meimi isn't fond of thinking. Physical: Meimi punches like a little girl. (Sadly... =_=;;) Mental: Meimi talks to the walls. (I do, actually. It's very good for stress-relief *heart*) Motivation: Meimi strives to make others cry. (I hope not~) Lalala...congratulations on the new domain, Tin-chama~! XD I *heart* that layout...I wanted the oversize poster of that pic *so* badly at Fanime, but I knew 'Kaasan would never let me hang up That. (I was gonna settle for the angsty but more innocent Shiori/Juri one, but when I came back (getting that stupid "I should limit my funds between several days" idea in my head =_=) it was gone. XO I still want.) I want to go home and watch the Ruka episodes. ;_; Friday, May 11, 2001 02:46 p.m. Shiori, wai~! I'm glad you like them. ^^ (BTW, I tried to CG the Haruko and Kongo pic, but it's not working out. >.>; I might just copy the pic and color it with markers after all...if you didn't see, I CGed the ribbon pics and they're up, starting with cgrib something. But I might redo the second one because I did something to Toshi's hair by accident in the first, and tried to repeat it in the second, but it didn't work >_<;) If you get me the script next weekend, maybe, then I can start on it seriously right when my summer vacation starts...I get out the last day of May, so I'll be free after that to spend a few days locked up in my room devoting my life to MW. XD; (Gah, when I talk about it like that it makes me realize finals are around the corner @___@) Oh, hell. O_O; I only have nineteen days tll the end of school to drag up my grades from the PIT they've descended into. Well, actually I think I'm okay in everything but algebra. Eh well. Ganbaranakya ne...must...start human anatomy project due Tuesday... @___@;;; Shitakunai no ni, yarushika nai yo ne. Mouuuu... ^^; I have no will to do such things...so... "So I'll get a! Fresh start tomorrow 'cause I! Work best under pressure and there'll be! LOTS of pressure~~~" XD Friday, May 11, 2001 07:45 a.m. np: Tenshi Androgynous - Shoujo Kakumei Utena (Since you put me in a Ruka Mood, Amichi...*pause*....poooor Rukaaaaaaaa~!!! XO Augh, I'm getting the worst longing to rewatch those eps right now...along with the last Touga/Utena duel episode...) We rented The Emperor's New Groove today. XD GAH. That was the funniest Disney movie I've *ever* seen, and I already begged 'Kaasan to buy it on DVD. ^^ (It was overly amusing, because when she turned into the kitten and started acting all psycho...aniki started choking out, "That's *YOU*. That. IS. *YOU*." And I realized he was right. ^^;;) =_= I'm totally exhausted. I have a huge project due on Tuesday not started...and I wanted to scream about how much I *LOATHE* my algebra teacher now.....but I've done enough of that lately. But Emily does really funny imitations of her. And described her regular expression as "that of a serial killer about to strike". And the problem is the way she GLARES, she really -does-. XD;;; And while she glared at me (for asking a question o_o) today, I just turned away and tried not to laugh at her. XD;;;; My human anatomy teacher popped in to class today. And started rummaging around through our rats bare-handed. =_= Oh, and we had practice today. ^_^ We decided to revive the play and musical for Fine Arts night next week...both were made up of vignettes, so we could do just a few scenes each. It's seriously a wonderful feeling to be together again with all these people I love so much, working together on something that was over months ago. XD And I got to rewatch bits of You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown...which I don't get sick of. They didn't do my favorite bits, though, since they were going for big ground scenes...I still wanted to see Shannon do her, "And IIIIIIIIIII will be Kuuuu-weeeeee-----n~!!!" bit again. XD; But they're doing the book report scene, which is muchly amusing. "If I start writing now, when I'm not really rested- it will, upset my thinking, which is not good at allll~" XD Thursday, May 10, 2001 11:02 p.m. In the story Ali-tachi are writing, the characters are based off of answers we gave to a survey. So the characters aren't us, but based off us well enough... Demo...nande atashi no kyara wa otoko no ko ni niteru no kashira. >_>; Kodomoppokute no wa iin dakedo (hontou no atashi made kodomo atsukusai wa kirai nandakedo!) nande otoko ni niteru made~?! *shiku*shiku* Sonna ni otoko no ko ni nitenai wa yo, atashi! Ne?! Mushiro... o_O Maa ne. Hontou no otoko jya nakatta no wa yokatta yo ne. (Ali to Leslie no wa sou damon ne~ Leslie wa dou omotteru no ka naa...Ali wa kawamanai to wakatteru kedo...) Daaaatte, hontou no otoko dattara atashi...ano ko-tachi ni nani suru ka wakannai yo. XD Niteru dake de atashi kounatta ne. *ohohoho* Thursday, May 10, 2001 07:35 a.m. pitas.com: not as yummy as some bishounen, but hey...what is? XD

archives... MEIMI... Age: 15 Page: M-T Email: meimi@time-stranger.net AIM: ksainttail Computer: A cute, slightly mischievious PC named Nokoru. PLAYLIST... FAVORITE... Anime: Digimon/02, Cowboy Bebop, CLAMP Gakuen Tanteidan, Please Save My Earth Manga: Tokyo Babylon, KKJ, Yami no Matsuei Fun Girls: Kusakabe Maron, Kokushou Sakura, Tachikawa Mimi, Yamazaki Miyu, Kannuki Wakaba Pretty Guys: Sei-chan, Imonoyama Nokoru, Nishikiori Issei, Ishida Yamato, Ichijouji KEN. XD Songs: Miruku (CHARA), Super Girl (Digimon02), Dakishimetai (GALS!) Quote: "Kagayaita kaze wo ukete, hirogaru sora he tobitateru sa...Dive into shine, fukai yami mo hikari ni kawaru...sono shuunkan shinjiteru kara...shinjitsuzukeru..."-Dive Into Shine, Lastier OTHER BLOGS... allegretto basic black cat's delicacy convent girl doushita no?! kaijuu ga iru kelemenopy kyoko pensieve pillow book tegretol dreams that damn duck the bishounen diaries tokyo darlings truth two-faced valhalla which way is up? zooSTATION