. Thursday, May 9, 2002 np: Superman - Five For Fighting God, I feel like shit. As is typical for any big test I've ever needed to take, I crashed on my bed and slept through all potential study time. God. I honestly don't care that much, it is seriously just to give it a shot, but the thing is...I'd feel better if I knew I wasn't the only one thinking so? I know the girls who take it, they lie about 'not studying' to make themselves look better. I sometimes feel I'm the only one who says what I mean in this world at times. And when I say I'm not going to study much, I don't. When I say I'm not going to write some BS busywork paper a teacher gives us, I don't do it. If I say it's a waste of my time, I don't bother. And everyone always agrees with me, and say they won't do it either, and then it's time for someone wanting results and everyone has it, they did it. Fuck everyone around me is so phony. I hate it. I just had a...shitty day...starting out with an English test which was fucking. waste. of. time. The teacher obviously wrote the test in five minutes. It had spelling and grammatical errors galore, questions poorly worded, multiple choice matching sections had wrong answers to fill in the blank, and the letters for the scantron choices were labeled incorrectly, the vocab definitions matching to the WORD ITSELF being used....and his tests are usually fucking STUPID to begin with. It was all the usual stupidity of his tests but about a zillion times worse. I was pissed. Grade? No, I don't give a damn, but I hate that class because he lets the class go out of control and we never do anything. Since he lets chaos reign, nobody shows him any respect, but we also get no respect from him. And if any of us had turned in a paper that was the quality of that test, we would have been laughed out of the honors class. I hate it when teachers just don't give a damn. The older I get, the less I care about pleasing teachers who I don't like. This year out of my classes, the only teacher who's absolutely thrilled me is Mr. Y. And that won't ever change, because he is certainly one of the most amazing people I've ever met. If I can grow up to be even a tiny, tiny bit like him, then I'd be happy. He doesn't give grudging respect, he...just offers it freely. One of those rare teachers in this world today that honestly makes you feel as though you're a worthwhile human being. More than worthwhile. Priceless. People who don't give a damn are just getting to me. I hate my history teacher, and seeing as how I've been holed up in her room for the last two weeks at every lunch...plus her class...God. I hate her. She's a terrible person. She doesn't respect anyone, has the most terrible holier-than-thou attitude, has an obsession with being right and will make any student who questions her feel like shit. Today Rachel (bless her heart) decided to get into a debate with her about major political scandals, and the woman wouldn't even let her speak. She never lets ANYONE speak, if they can even get in a word edgewise (because she just keeps talking OVER you if you try to explain a point) she doesn't listen. I hate that woman. If it weren't for the fact that everyone knows how she is, our class would be miserable. You get personally insulted and put down by her at least once every two weeks, in front of the entire class. Luckily, as I said, we're all kind of united against her, so you don't have to worry about what other people think of her talking shit about you. Rather if you can leave the room with any shred of diginity left. She nails me pretty frequently but I quit raising my hand after the first month of class, after realizing participation only makes you miserable. I can generally put up with it, but...ugh, sometimes she'll just snap out about how stupid YOU are (out of the entire class, singled out in front of the entire class) and...it's just that one straw that breaks the camel's back on that bad day. One day near the beginning of school, I was accused of sleeping in class since I asked her to clarify something, and she just went after me over and over...I was torn between crying and wanting to jump over my desk and hit her. Luckily I just sat at my desk and shook silently with a smile on my face...but the only thing that kept me from crying was that I didn't want her to see it. So back to the English teacher. Moron. Idiot. I don't know him as a person well although I think he's a jerk, and I know he's a bad teacher. Even if he could enforce order, he's an idiot (I objected to the way he was making our class analyze a poem last week because I thought he was killing the metaphor by running WAY too far with "what ifs" to make the poem into something it wasn't...and he said, "LIFE is a metaphor!" in reply. what the hell?)...I understand how everyone felt about our sophomore teacher now. I loved her as a person, but she was also a crappy teacher, and Ali and I were the only ones who liked her so overwhelmingly as a person to let it carry over into the class. Ali, meanwhile, knows our current teacher and she was defending him by saying he had the school literary magazine to finish up. It's amazing how much students will put up with nowadays, really. For any kind of respect from their teachers at all. Ah, I don't know what I'm saying anymore. I'm absolutely exhausted, and annoyed because I woke up at 8:28 to have missed Friends completely. It's obviously not a big deal, but just one more thing to sigh over. It's just tiresome though, to keep having to beg for teachers not to treat you like trash nowadays. The only teacher who makes me feel as though I'm worth a thing is Mr. Y...it's tiresome. I'm not saying they have to love us. They don't all need to make me feel special, because not every teacher is one of those teachers. But just giving me the opportunity to learn...to be challenged on a fair scale...to not waste my time...that would be appreciated. God I feel like crap. Just watch, I'll be the only girl in the study group who doesn't pass the AP. I don't care about passing it or not myself, I just don't want to be the only one who really does get a 1. They all joke about it, they all joke about how they haven't studied and will fail, but they. fucking. LIE. They're all sitting up late right this moment with their cram study books and they'll be up for hours yet, and then they'll pass with flying colors and laugh about it. I hate how it becomes more of a showing of WHO ELSE than YOURSELF, nowadays. I should be better than that, but I'm really just very, very petty. At least I'm honest about it. I just wish people would be honest with me too. she ran from karenlego @ 10:32 p.m. Thursday, May 9, 2002 np: I am [remix] - Inuyasha I've become such a Buffy fangirl. Geri (who sl0res me more than should be allowed) is going to lend me a novel tomorrow. Spike/Drusilla, so I want to read it, but still. And our cable system here is completely messed up, so out of the little Buffy freaks at our school, only Alica gets to see it on Tuesday, because she has satellite. The rest of us have to wait till Saturday, and if you ask Alica to tell a little, she gives away the whole thing. So can't ask her about it. But she's mean. XD Anyway, I'm toying with the idea of season two box set as a present to myself for finishing junior year, provided I get out alive. But that's the sort of purchase that would be most fun to share with friends - the Buffy fangirls at my school have their sets on preorder already (and have seen most all of it already), and my other friends aren't into it. Sigh. Of course I can try to sl0re Les and Ali on it, but I don't think it'll work. Wah. she ran from karenlego @ 04:40 p.m. Thursday, May 9, 2002 np: Kokoro yo Genshi ni Modore [naked flower mix] - Hayashibara Megumi No English...I'm not even in any AP classes (my entire school only offers calc and bio ^_^;) so I'm not going to push it. Like I said, I haven't a chance of passing the history one. ^^; Kya-san, I'd absolutely join a text trans doumei. I think that's a really clever idea. Anyway, seeing as how the AP is tomorrow, I'm going to be a very good girl and study today. In English class I'm going to finish my test early and do my math homework, in math I'm going to ganbatte, and the rest of the day will be AP when I have the chance. Really. No stopping till Friends tonight, even. Not even for watching more Buffy. Really. I have no willpower, but I think the key is believing yourself when saying these things. she ran from karenlego @ 07:15 a.m. Wednesday, May 8, 2002 np: Deja Vu - Hayashibara Megumi Okay. Who got here looking for this? My blog is the only hit on Google for it. And Aaya is, well, it just sort of boggles the mind to think of him as uke or seme. He's Aaya. Gay Aaya. Not seme. Not uke. Just gay Aaya. But you don't do Yuki/Kyou the way FFnet does it. FFnet has them pretending to like Tooru to make each other jealous. Pretending. Unlike the rest of the Furuba section (which I only venture into when I feel in the mood to break my brain - it never disappoints!), your fic is not only readable but enjoyable, especially for a pairing I'm not particularly fangirlish over. And the morning after is fun, too. XD Seriously, I've never read another good Furuba fic besides yours. It gives me hope when staring at FFnet summaries. Lala. I'll scan the whole Lego spread soon, to everyone who's been asking about it. she ran from karenlego @ 07:28 p.m. Tuesday, May 7, 2002 It's amazing where the hours of the day go when you watch Buffy. o_o Two episodes, nyah, The Initiative and the last new one. Alica: *aghast* You LIKED "Amends"? I thought it was stupid. Meimi: ...yeah, but I liked it because that was the first early episode I ever saw, and I fell in love with Oz and Willow. Alica: Yeah, that part was cute. Meimi: Because you know the part when she just throws herself at him? I was rolling around the floor, SCREAMING at the TV, "YOU! ARE SO! STUPIIID!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!" and *loving* it, and that was when I knew I wasn't gonna be able to stop watching. Alica: Yes. Yelling at the TV is a sure sign of addiction. XD Today... TV: I think I kinda like her. Meimi: *loudly* RILEY YOU MORON. TV: Riley, you're kinda a moron. Meimi: .... o_O ... =_= Anyway, was happy...(the bitchfight between Xander and Harmony in "The Initiative" nearly killed me XD he pulled her hair!) new episode was okay, Alica says season finale tonight but I don't know to believe her? All the last five seasons were 22 episodes even, no? And latest one was only episode 18...seems sort of fast to start wrapping things up, anyhow. she ran from karenlego @ 09:05 p.m. Tuesday, May 7, 2002 Told you so. And at least you got to see some Noin. I do feel sorry for you, though...I mean, the one character that carries the series and you're missing out. XD (I don't even like Noin! Though I think I might have grown to like him in the anime out of pure necessity. But I won't subject myself to that to find out.) Wai. XD I watched almost all of episode ten this morning but had to run to school...at this point I'm trying to snag all the later episodes now, so I can marathon it near the end. *heart* I'm liking it. Did I mention I should be studying for my AP test? Right? Right. *cough* And that until I went asking around, I didn't even remember what the War of 1812 was about? And that the essay is that time period? Right. (I'm so not going to pass. ^^;;) she ran from karenlego @ 08:34 a.m. Monday, May 6, 2002 np: Nothing in my hands - Tomokazu Seki I love Alica. Highlight for Buffy spoilers from last episode. :D Meimi: Alica? *shakeshake* WHAT HAPPENED? Alica: What? XD Meimi: Don't play dumb! I missed Buffy! What happened?! Alica: ...it was new? XD Meimi: *snarl* ANYA. Alica: What about her? Meimi: Demon. Yes? No? Alica: Oh. That. Yes. Meimi: .... Alica: ....XD Meimi: AND? Alica: *gleefully* And she slept with Spike! *RUNS off at top speed* Meimi: .... O.O ....ALIIICAAA!!! COME BACK HERE, YOU CAN'T SAY THAT AND LEAAAAAVE!!!!!!! Sometimes I think my friends can be recognized purely on evil factor - I had to run to catch her to drag the details out. And Geri taped it, of course, so I'll get to see it tomorrow, score! XD Meanwhile, continuing my theme of the past few weeks of anime series being rewatched, I'm working through Esca again. That music video, geez, it's amazing how much it inspired me. I'm falling back in love with Van again...though I still think Seki's best work is Kyou at the end of Furuba, the acting for Van is sparkly as well with the whole Nigetari Wa Shinai!!! bit. And it's finally happened. Allen has made me squirm and grit my teeth and squeak with outrage at the television. Nobody's ever been able to do that except Nagisa. Sigh... (I don't hate Allen though - he's probably my least favorite character, but after Chid, he's not so grating and...oozing with...Allen-ness). Seriously, each time in the beginning episodes he patted Hitomi on the head and told her this was a MAN'S job and not for delicate ladies, I kept wishing Hitomi would just smack him. Feh. But no. she ran from karenlego @ 08:02 p.m. Sunday, May 5, 2002 np: Miruku - Chara I had a nightmare last night. Whatever the impending doom was (for I no longer remember), the secret to defeat/escape from it was only with...Bell. Only she didn't send me the information. I woke at some tiny, dark hour of the morning today, crying and hysterical because Bell did not save me, and I forgot it was just a dream so I was still scared. I didn't remember until I woke up again, that I was safe. You have to realize my amusement, since I was awake at four AM or whatever, sniffling to myself and terrified out of my mind, and I don't even remember when the doom was. Stiiiill haven't studiiiiied...at the least I should be studying for math. That, unlike the AP, will affect my grade. she ran from karenlego @ 08:46 p.m. Sunday, May 5, 2002 np: I Believe - Yonekura Chihiro Welll, I think I appropriately scared enough people with the layout. When you say you're ENJOYING yourself, I hope you mean in the "it's so horribly, sickeningly, stupidly insulting to the manga that it's almost funny". Well, okay, the cafe billboard thing was funny, if not for the fact that I don't think it was meant to be as funny as it was. Watched ep 9 today. I'm hooked, you win. *_* Is Wolfwood in the next episode too? Got to talk to Les today, so I'm happy. While this weekend wasn't great (and I wasn't home to watch Buffy! ERGH! I'll download it or see if Geri taped it...but anyone who watched, did Anya become a demon? =_= I don't want to be spoiled beyond that if I can snag the tape from Geri)...well, it's nice having Sunday tomorrow. Three-day weekends make that extra day of Sunday so delightfully unexpected. I haven't a prayer of passing the AP U.S. history test next week, and I really don't wanna try. But since I feel obligated to give it half a shot, tomorrow will be study day. And hey, you know I finished a chapter of Gravi about two months ago and never uploaded it? I should do that tomorrow. she ran from karenlego @ 01:15 a.m. Saturday, May 4, 2002 Meia, that was pretty much the reaction I was going for. *niko* Ingrid, when I first read that, I thought you meant that you wanted to pop Keiichi-lego's head off (or do you?). Sadly the collection only seems to include the Dragons, though I think it's a pretty sorry deal when there's an Inuki-lego and no Kanoe...but then, um, the Karen-lego looks like enough of a h0 to make up for it. (The Kakyou one is really cute though, in yukata with his eyes shut. :D) Amusingly, with the unchangable basic Lego body makeup, Lego-Kamui and Lego-Fuuma are IDENTICAL, except maybe their hair parts on different sides? It's saddening how the Lego-body kills the Kamui Uke of the Universe look. Oh yes, and in the ad, in the background of the remains of Tokyo, there appears to be a Lego-Tokyo Tower lit up against the moon. XD Who here wouldn't pay good money for a Lego Tokyo Tower?! Seriously, it shocks me that there doesn't seem to be a release of this lego set. They'd sell, believe me they'd sell. I may think it's cruel, but I sure would buy this X set to get my yaoi lego fix. (It's a shame there aren't lego-shinken though. Sad.) she ran from karenlego @ 06:33 p.m. Saturday, May 4, 2002 np: Let Me Be With You - Chobits The lego layout that strikes fear into the hearts of X fangirls everywhere. Seriously. That Karen lego is SCARY. Picture had mgazine text all over; editing it was hell. But worth it. *heart* Updated links. Eh. I've just been going a bit off the spool lately...not really meaning to. Yesterday wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't been halfway to lalaland already, from going crazy earlier in the week. I need more sleep. she ran from karenlego @ 01:47 p.m.

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. Meimi? is sixteen (tanjoubi 11/18), is generally a genki person, but her cheerful and innocent appearance masks an evil fangirl mind. XD Sparkles at friends, drawing, shopping at Mitsuwa, manga, shounen ai and yaoi, fangirlism as a way of life Has been reading Houshin Engi, Furuba Has been watching Trigun, Furuba Has been listening to Chara, Cascade Wishes she could stalk Imonoyama Nokoru, Seguchi Touma, Hayate, Sasame, Souma Yuki, Souma Ayame, Souma Akito, Sei-chan, Youzen, Ran, Ishida Yamato, Ichijouji Ken Wishes she could also stalk (albeit with less enthusiasm) Kusakabe Maron, Sumeragi Hokuto, Ohkawa Utako, Awayuki Himeno, Awayuki Mawata, Haruhara Haruko, Souryu Asuka Langley, Katsuragi Misato, Sakurazuka Setsuka Can be found by email at meimi@strawberrymoon.net or AIM at KSaintTail Current layout: Possibly the cruellest thing to happen to the X cast since the eyeball? This was from a spread in Newtype.com, beautiful color copy provided by Les. *heart* I don't think these are for sale, but if indeed I could find X legos, I would be a very happy fangirl (lego yaoi!). Except the Karen one might give me nightmares. maybetomorrow - archive - playlist fanfiction - pitas allegretto applesauce atashi.blog aqua stranger basic black cat's delicacy chicken scratch complete strangers den of otakudom disintegration dreams of sakura echoes from the void eyes unclouded faded memories freetalk fuuma's shoes Øgravity green tea ice cream headphones save lives illegible scribbles kaijuu ga iru kudaranai kyoko legal alien lime rain one dimensional pensieve somedays good somedays bad technomancy that damn duck the bishounen diaries the letters from no one tokyo darling tsubasa uncommon valhalla which way is up? winnow in thy abraxas jin sarah shi-chan shiori .

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