Friday, August 9, 2002 dennistime
Those spam artists have done it again. By throwing a simple four-letter nonsense word into a subject heading, they practically guarantee that some inquisitive mind will reply. Joshua, your question got me thinking. And by thinking I mean poking around the internet looking for milf. Perhaps it's time to take up a hobby.

milf [milf'] n. slang acronym - Mother I'd Like To Fuck, first coined in the film [almost "milf" backwards] American Pie [which I must admit, I haven't seen.]

Entertaining sidenote: Checking the Google image search for milf gets us military men kicking each other, a tank made of Legos, a scene from American Pie, a slice of what appears to be lemon tiramisu, varied landscape photos, an origami MILennium Falcon , and of course, a monkey nursing a baby.

Friday, August 9, 2002 05:01 a.m.
So I got a spam email promoting "milf" for my inbox. My immediate reaction was "what the fuck is milf?". Enter Google. Google search reveals that "milf" is one of three things:

1 A power-pop band from Bradford, England

2 A paramilitary Muslim extremist group from the Phillipines

3 Some porn thing involving moms

Do I get to choose which brand of "milf" I want in my inbox? And what exactly does "milf" mean in the pornographic sense? It seems to be some kind of acronym. Is this a widespread fetish? Do the rebels in the Phillipines partake of it? What about the band from Bradford? Is the band Muslim? Bradford is after all one of Britain's Muslim Centers. Do the Phillipine extremists threaten to "trap and sperm moms all across America" just like the M.I.L.F-Hunter? Are the connections merely eponymous? Does this have anything to do with the celebrated "Naughty Wives" pornographer who hacked Al Qaeda's website? Somehow all of the answers lead only to more questions. It all seems like a chapter out of the Illuminatus Trilogy or else a bad trip. Maybe both. Any theories Lumpyworld?
Joshua-Wheels-Inside-Of-Wheels

Wednesday, August 7, 2002 11:26 a.m.
Our careers as models have really taken off here in Sweden.
Joshua-And-Liza-Glamorama

Tuesday, August 6, 2002 12:26 p.m.
After years of deliberation I've finally decided that Ramble On is my favorite song that mentions gollum in its lyrics. Thought I'd share that.
One-Joshua-To-Rule-Them-All

Tuesday, August 6, 2002 10:15 a.m.
Behind the Typeface -- who knew typeface designers had a sense of humor? (See J's cooper black posting below.)

By the way, Dame Joo-dey, I share your sentiments that the Swimsuit issue has got to go, but I haven't had a chance yet. Anyone else, please feel free: First, you archive from the main pitas menu. Then you play with the html settings, again from the main pitas window.

Oh, and by the way: Welcome, Henry Jasper Norton! (on Friday Aug. 2, 2002)

Man from G.N.U.

Tuesday, August 6, 2002 05:28 a.m.
The sordid past of Cooper Black, a font that's been to hell and back. (Warning: 3M .swf file – may take a while to download.)
Joshua-Baskerville

Friday, August 2, 2002 dennistime
Nuno, that CD cover reminds me of the cult classic "Ed The Happy Clown" comic, in which a miniature head of Ronald Reagan is somehow accidentally attached to the end of poor Ed's member just around the time when he befriends a nude female flying vampire and runs from various scary people trying to get him. Don't believe me? Click here. For some reason, the direct link doesn't work - you have to scroll down a little and click on the far right image.
Just had to share.

Friday, August 2, 2002 01:06 p.m.
By the way, I was walking around the record store and my eye fell on this album -- take a real close look at the cover, one of the most tasteless thing I've ever seen. Which you know just makes me curious. For pure enjoyment, read the customer reviews, all glowingly positive:
"The vocalist on one song literally sounds like he is gurgling on vomit,trying to cough it up but can't."
"The kind of music that you might want to slowly torture your pet while tripping on acid."
Gnucore

Friday, August 2, 2002 10:25 a.m.
Hey, while we are the subject of music, 2 purchases from a few months back that have never left my CD player since I bought them:
Blazing Arrow by Blackalicious: these guys worked with DJ Shadow early on and it infected their whole sound. Think DJ Shadow beats (circa Endtroducing, not the recent junk) over intelligent, hilarious, tempo-skewed rap lyrics (one song, "Chemical Calisthenics", is basically about the periodic table rapped over a continuously changing beat with the vocal delivery keeping time to the beat -- ya have to hear it to believe it -- and the spoken word poem on the track "Release" brings the album to a great close).
At Dawn by My Morning Jacket: Some of the best American music you've ever heard. They're from Kentucky, and the only way to describe their sound is if Neil Young married Willie Nelson -- you listen to the music and you're on a open grassy plane staring at a wide blue sky. It's just beautiful big sky music.

The Real Music Gnerd

Friday, August 2, 2002 8:38 a.m.
OK lumpyworld, let's just simmah down down. The List is mighty offensive. Hell I have more reason than anyone to be offended. Not only am I a proud owner of Bitches' Brew, but I've always considered Paul's, Being There,and Violent Femmes to be among the "Perfect Albums" in this world, and The List contained several others (Midnight Vultures, Giant Steps, Daydream Nation,) that I really love. (not to mention a general attack on Stereolab's very existence, which is atiethical to all I stand for, musically speaking that is.)
But. But, But, But Doonie put it best when he described it as "crafted by music nerds to offend music nerds." Really all they want to do is be offensive, and yeah, sure, they succeeded. They're crabby, preachy, and alternativer-than-thou, so big deal if they sling some mud just to have a good time. Let them have a ball.
My advice to the makers of the list is to get in touch with their inner Paul. For years I was a vicious music snob, and then I found The Walrus. It doesn't have to be fantastic to be great music. Hell, sometimes a little fluff sets the tone just right.
And about the Beasties discussion I think the answer is clear. They sure don't have very much melanin, do they? This may make you either hate them (The List) or love them (Mainstream Radio) but that's beside the point. Do you fucking enjoy the music or not?
My view of The List is best summed up by the brilliant and talented Dr. Dean Ween of New Hope, PA: "The whole principle and ethic of what we do is...we're trying to entertain ourselves. That's it. And we don't really care so much about other people. But the way it works is if you're having a good time and you're being honest, then it just transcends all that and people will dig it. And you play shows and they have a great time and you have a great time. The same with our records...we always said when it's not fun anymore then we'll quit."

A-Fucking-Men.

Joshua-Good-Day-Sunshine

Thursday, August 1, 2002 07:28 p.m.
Placing the Beastie Boys on the suggested discard list does bring up an interesting point: does over-exposure make a cool thing any less cool? That's debatable. From teeny-boppers to my parents, you are almost guaranteed to find at least a single Beastie Boys CD in their collection. [I don't think my parents have an entire CD, but they at least have a song or two on a mix.] People who don't like rap music [or for that matter, are afraid of black people] still find the Beasties perfectly acceptable. Even the local [white mainstream "alternative"] radio station [which doesn't play rap] plays 3 Beastie Boys songs every Friday morning at 8AM sharp. The Beasties are the least common denominator of good taste. If forced to discard them, then what will you be forced to politely request when you spend an evening with someone else's dispeptic tunes?

H. Faltermeyer

Thursday, August 1, 2002 10:43 a.m.
Nuh-uh. No they didn't. They did not put Paul's Boutique in the top 25 of albums to get rid of. That's just plain wrong.
gnu

Wednesday, July 31, 2002 dennistime
Judy, your "essential albums to remove" is absolutely hilarious. Crafted by music nerds to offend music nerds. And dammit, it works. My question is this: they hate Rush and jazz for the same reason [musical masturbation,] and loathe anything regularly blasted out of college dorm-rooms. Why then, no Phish?

Admit it, you all own Bitches' Brew.

Tuesday, July 30, 2002 4:40 p.m.
Ahhh, Mr. Dinkins' "gorgeous mosaic", captured for all eternity by the plush prose of the Newspaper of Record.

"At the Bliss Spa in SoHo, Ann Marie, an aromatherapist, said the daily smells one encounters have a dramatic impact on a person's mental health. That is why they offer aromatic massage.
'It is a targeted blend of essential oils that are going to target whatever bumped you off balance,' she said, adding that in the summer there are plenty of nasty smells that can affect a person's mood. To combat the sweaty togetherness of the subway she suggested lemon. 'Lemon is uplifting and stimulating,' she said. And to get over the whiff of rancid garbage, perhaps lavender would help. 'Lavender is soothing and calming,' she said. But lavender and lemon might not be enough for Henry Jordan. As the sanitation worker responsible for cleaning the truck that handled the fish market refuse, he thinks he may have the worst-smelling job in New York. When other New Yorkers are back in their air-conditioned, smell-controlled environments, Mr. Jordan will just be leaving to start his overnight shift downtown.
He will spend nearly an hour in the fish truck scrubbing and deodorizing. The heat is his worst enemy. 'Tonight will be awful,' he said. 'The smell will be just awful.' "
by Marc Santora for the New York Times

Liza and I will be back in Kings County quite early in Zeptember and the rumors have already started concerning a Second Anual ZepFest. Grab your prosthetic johnson and scream "baby! baby! baby! baby! baby!" like there's a hellhound on your trail and you've sold your soul to Mr. Beelzebub in exchange for a tasty bit of underage shark meat after the show
Joshua-in-your-hedgerow

Tuesday, July 30, 2002 02:16 p.m.
Pandy, please change the background! These anime chicks are enough already.

To cool off, I give you The Japanese Ice Cream Exhibition.

Also, I don't agree with all of these choices, but it's amusing all the same.

-- La Judy Prego Spaghetti Sauce

Tuesday, July 30, 2002 dennistime
Just 33 days until Zeptember.

Monday, July 29, 2002 dennistime
Dear Lumpy: today I wasted time by trying to discern the identity of Digital Underground's chromatic enigmatic piano man. Perhaps not surprisingly, I found contradictory evidence that [a] the piano man is none other than Shock-G himself and [b] the piano man is a cat named Darin Whittington. Upon further Googlification, it seems that this Whittington guy has returned to his first love, playing gospel organ at church. So, it seems that Shock may have yet another alter ego. In any case, here's what Humpty's ebonics dictionary would look like if ever he compiled one. Piano man, take us outta here.

Monday, July 29, 2002 12:11 p.m.
NYC newsflash: The says for today's weather: "Torrid and humid." 95 degrees today, and with humidity, will feel more like 105. It's at times like these that Base Arturo Prat sounds welcoming.
Gnu Sweating it Out

Monday, July 29, 2002 11:00 a.m.
If you're at all like me then you can't wait until the new Beck album comes out on September 24.
If you're at all like you then you don't have to. Let your thunderpeel down to the good old newly monochromatified Beck.com web event where a new song appears every week until the album is released, as if by magic! Good God!
Joshua-and-his-sister-(I-think-her-name's-Debra)

Friday, July 26, 2002 dennistime
friday footwear fun, folks: flip flops flying. click here. seriously, some silly submitters sent sandals soaring skyward. sixteen set series.

Friday, July 26, 2002 dennistime
Well, the Weezer / muppet video link seems to work fine for me - it's the only one I could find for Quicktime. However, there's lots of Realplayer versions out there. Why not try this one?

Friday, July 26, 2002 12:26 p.m.
It happened again as it was bound to, indeed as it was written ages ago in the book of life. Lumpy Oatmeal got a hit from someone who was searching for information on Zorb franchising. The hit came from a Google search for "Zorb Franchise" and we showed up (twice) on page three (results 23 and 24 out of about 32).

So why do you think that Google searches always say "Results X out of 'about' X"? What's up with the "about"? Can't they just say how many results they found? Is this due to some law that Yahoo! rammed through congress?

Also: The Wheezer link below is expired. Can Lord Doonie of RaChaCha updateth ye olde link? Wheezer and the muppets together at last! I wait expectantly for the new link and the masturbatory possiblities that it will hypothetically offer. Mmm, muppets.

Dadajoshua

Friday, July 26, 2002 12:08 p.m.
What happens to type designers who spend too much time in northern Europe? Why they design elaborate typefaces dedicated to saunas of course and then throw a raucus naked sauna party in the streets of Berlin to celebrate the type's release.
Joshua-Garamond

Thursday, July 25, 2002 dennistime
Just look what you can get from the scary street salesman late at night.
"... Packets!... get them packets!"

Thursday, July 25, 2002 dennistime
I'm sure this will be all over the place very soon, but it's too good to be missed! Check out the new video from Weezer, in which they appear on the Muppet Show. A butt-ass slow warning is in full effect.

Friday, July 19, 2002 10:45 a.m.
"I've been spayed, I tell you! I've been spayed!"

Gnu's got the Gnife

Thursday, July 18, 2002 06:33 p.m.
Moms and kids agree: when there's a lego band spinning on tiered platforms to the tunes of Ween, you know it's good for you!

Thursday, July 18, 2002 02:58 p.m.
Did you see this Lego video for The Mollusk???? Please, you must.
- Big Fat Judy

Thursday, July 18, 2002 12:13 p.m.
You know, "Night of the Lepus" once provided the springboard for a discussion with someone at work regarding the word, "lepus." If you look up the word in the dictionary, it does not exist. Instead, you're offered suggestions like "lupus," meaning "any of several diseases characterized by skin lesions." Hmmm -- not exactly. You might think that "lepus" is a variation on "lupine," but that means "wolfish," not "rabbitish." So where does this leave us? A yahoo search on "lepus" turns up only some Night of the Lepus curiosities, including a proposal for remaking "Night of the Lepus." And you think I have too much free time. And then you try a google search on "lepus," and you learn that, truly, not all search engines are created equal: Lepus is the scientific genus name for hares! And you thought the filmmakers were burnouts who couldn't tell their rabbitish from their wolfish.

Hop Along Gnu

Thursday, July 18, 2002 08:53 p.m.
RE: Red Dawn
I must admit that this has always been a family favorite. Becca, Joel and I can always lift each other's spirits with a well timed "WOOOLVERIIINES!". I am astounded by the depth of emotions expressed in the reviews of this movie in the user database. Not one person mentioned that this movie rocks the world in association with a well packed 3-footer, which I believe is the bottom line. This movie is very much on the same level as Night of the Lepus, which is to say that it needs to be enjoyed in the right light, which I might add, is not the same light its creators intended it to be enjoyed in. My favorite moment in the movie is when the "women-folk" teenagers end up back at the campsite with the "men-folk" teenagers after witnessing the horrors of the Russian/Cuban/Nicaraguan Communist Re-education camp. They are all stuned and silent until Jennifer Grey says, poignantly, "Everything's different now." What a moment! Watch this film and pack a friend!
Joshua-Science-Theater-3000

Wednesday, July 17, 2002 dennistime
hey HEY hey! Here are today's bizarre little movie-lets:
- why you shouldn't give bananas crack
- a Spumco-lookin' striptease
- and the ever-pleasing continuing adventures of the happy tree friends
Warning: these also may take precious time from your life.

Wednesday, July 17, 2002 05:43 p.m.
I was on the phone with my brother earlier, who was all excited by some recent purchases at Tower Record's DVD bargain bin -- for $10 each, he picked up Spaceballs ("Comb the desert!") and Red Dawn. Spaceballs is a classic, but Red Dawn -- wow, I actually remember going to see Red Dawn at the theatres. Patrick Swayze, C. Thomas Howell, Charlie Sheen and Jennifer Grey (no Commie puts baby in the corner) -- grade B stars when they were young. We were laughing at how silly the movie was ("Wolverines!") and I checked it out on the Internet Movie Database. It's outrageous: there's some really frightening people out there -- read the user comments on the movie:
"This film is generally not appreciated for what it is: a very believable attempt at portraying a scenario where Americans have to engage in guerilla warfare on their own soil. It follows a band of these guerillas from their first sloppy operations to their inspiring successes and finally to their tragic and heroic end--all the while ringing true."

Whaddafuk? It was the 80s Reagan years, fer chrissakes! It's just a dumb movie -- thankfully, at least one guy gets it:
"I rented this movie with a friend of mine for one thing. On the back, there is a picture of Soviet troops at a McDonalds. My friend and I figured it would be interesting to see Soviet troops invade and take over a McDonalds. However, we discovered that that scene was cut out of the movie, yet was still on the back cover. Apart from this tragedy, the movie was okay, and had an entertaining plot."

-Guerilla Gnu

Monday, July 15, 2002 05:57 a.m.
As Paul Simon so aptly put it: "Art gives us lists of dense unreadable books, that's why I'm going to Graceland."

Thursday, July 11, 2002 10:21 p.m.

As filmmaker Ray Carney put it "Art gives us dense, lumpy oatmeal experiences - not a thin gruel of rules and formulas."

Thursday, July 11, 2002 05:30 p.m.
You go, Doonieman -- everyone needs to know that it IS a lumpy oatmeal world after all. And people, we need to continue funding this important research -- our lumpy oatmeal scientists are sitting in the corner going hungry! Please send in your donations right now by clicking here.

By the way, [WARNING: adults only] if you agree that this is the most f*cked up sex fetish ever[OK, warning ovah], then believe me, you are not alone. (Courtesy of memepool.com)

Anyway, a few of us went out last night, and surprise, suprise, ended up in a bar that was having a drag game show. Shequida is now my favorite drag queen: a 7 foot tall (with those 7 inch stilletos, thank you), black drag queen with flowing blond hair, she opened up the show by lip synching a nasty rap song. All I remember is that the chorus went, "Bitch, go change yo' Kotex!" I wish I remembered more of the words, but it was a boozy night. It had to do with smacking someone up with a dirty sanitary napkin -- you know, a love song.

So, of course, I spent some time today trying to find the lyrics online. While I didn't find that particular song, I did come accross these little treasures on a google search using "lyrics kotex": a Kool Keith song, "Neighbors Next Door" ("I want a kotex with whip cream") and a Twistid song, "Bad Dream" ("Cause I got a black belt in the art of Wo-Tongue-Fu"). No luck on Shequida, though.

But I got to thinking about that monthly visitor that our lady friends have to endure and the people who put that feeling into song. There's Mary J. Blige's "PMS", off her most recent album, No More Drama -- although the song is all drama: "Understand where I'm comin from / Feelin really bitch yeah / And I don't feel like be a nice to nobody". And there's Angie Stone's "Time of the Month", off her recent album, Mohogany Soul ("Don't wanna hear your lies / Let me go to bed / Swallow my pride / Cuz you be sleeping outside"). These soul divas really feel that PMS.

So, what I'd like to know -- are there any more PMS songs out there? Please post.

Gnu Pulling on the String

Thursday, July 11, 2002
vanilla Coke sucks.

Thursday, July 11, 2002
Recently, I spotted a small dot with the word "telephone" beside it on a map of the Mojave desert, 15 miles from the main interstate in the middle of nowhere. Intrigued, I donned a cheap, brown serape and a pair of wing-tips and headed out to find it in my old jeep.
Here begins a meandering tale of desert telephone booths, obsession, and volcanic rocks. And it's all true.

Thursday, July 11, 2002 dennistime
By far, the best pipe-smoking chimpanzee I've ever seen. Wow.

Thursday, July 11, 2002
Norman : "Finally, a site where i can get credit for some of my crazy inventions."
Wilbur: "Ooh, a public place where I can rip apart some truly dumb ideas."

Thursday, July 11, 2002 dennistime
Just saw a screening of the film Scratch, a documentary which traces the history of the DJ from meager beginnings with turntables in a bedroom [or a kitchen, in Grand Master Flash's case] to the rise of hip-hop and the experimental directions turntablism is moving in today. Much like its big brother, Ken Burns' Jazz, the film gives an oft-dismissed art form due credit and explains the role a popular trend plays in creating culture. Big fatty thumb up. Can't wait for the video.

Wednesday, July 10, 2002 11:33 p.m.

I rest easier knowing that someone, somewhere, is keeping track of every book Art Garfunkel reads.

Wednesday, July 10, 2002
Happy chillin music for the summer:
Smokey & Miho are Miho Hatori [vocalist for Cibo Matto and Gorillaz] and Smokey Hormel [most recently a hired guitarist for Tom Waits and Beck]. The two have put out a 5-song EP celebrating their mutual love of Brazilian music, and are currently working on a full-length. Ooh, pretty!

Wednesday, July 10, 2002
Poking around the net for all things "Malmo," one comes across the moonbabies, who claim to be closely related to Sonic Youth and Yo La Tengo. Any thoughts from our Swedish contingent?
Doonie, sadly bereft of umlauts

Wednesday, July 10, 2002 06:35 p.m.

'Degrees' academic fudged numbers
By Dan Vergano
USA Today

An academic urban myth underlies the popular belief that everyone in the world is connected by just "six degrees of separation," according to a second look into the research behind the idea.

Enshrined in a popular play, movie and a game involving actor Kevin Bacon, the notion that disparate people are connected by a short chain of mutual friends caught on after 1967 research by Yale psychologist Stanley Milgram.

In that effort, Milgram had Midwesterners try to send a letter to a stranger using only friends as intermediaries. The friends in turn were allowed to pass the letter to their friends, and so on. On average, it took five friends (six degrees of separation) for the letters to reach their destination. Milgram famously concluded that we live in a "small world."

Hoping to repeat that original research, psychologist Judith Kleinfield of the University of Alaska-Fairbanks visited Yale's archives, she recounts in a study in the journal Society. "Milgram was my hero," she says, but what she found there left her disappointed:

• Milgram recruited "particularly sociable" people for his study using newspaper ads, not random people.
• Only about 30 percent of the letters from Milgram's small-world studies ever arrived, sometimes taking nine steps or more.
• An unpublished study in the archive sent to Milgram for review suggested that low-income people's messages didn't get through.

Instead of the "small world" Milgram proposed, the research suggests we live in a
"lumpy oatmeal" world, says Kleinfield, populated by a few very well-connected wealthy individuals, with everyone else not so well connected.

"Kleinfield does everyone a service by showing us the (six degrees of separation) question is still open," says mathematician Steven Strogatz of Cornell University. A pioneer in the mathematics that connect systems such as computer and biological networks, Strogatz and his colleagues have found numerous "small world" connections in nonhuman assemblages.

--From the Albany Times Union, 20 January 2002

Tuesday, July 9, 2002
Tickets are going on sale this week for a Beck's short solo acoustic tour. Get'em while they're hot. New CD in September, too. Woo hoo Bonnaroo!

Tuesday, July 9, 2002 still dennistime
Matt and Dan have constructed their own lumpy-stylee site that even quotes from Steely Dean and Gene's anthem, "Pandy Fackler." Rock on, our brethren!

Tuesday, July 9, 2002 dennistime
Keeping with the anime motif, here's a short film explaining why extra-terrestrials don't make good students in modern-day communist China. Of course, it's all set to a rocking Saturday morning cartoon theme song that would make Alvin and his chipmunks proud. Warning: it takes a butt-ass long time to load.

Tuesday, July 9, 2002
This one's for the Judies.

Monday, July 8, 2002 06:46 p.m.
Check out the all-girl summer fun band! They're the coolest!

Monday, July 8, 2002 06:40 p.m.
Doesn't it make a good CD just a little bit better when there's a hidden track ten minutes after the last song? That way you can confuse the hell out of everybody when you pick that song on the jukebox in a crowded bar. More than once I've been jolted awake after dozing off at the end of a nice peaceful album.
Dennis

Friday, July 5, 2002 dennistime
What would happen if Danny Elfman, Rosemary Clooney, and Abbott & Costello got together and made a short film about a monkey? Playfully random bizarreness would ensue, of course.

July 4th, 2002
Happy Fourth of July, all you lumpies out there! Today we feature select adult works from Shel Silverstein, who incidentally started his career as a cartoonist for the Pacific edition of the military newspaper Stars And Stripes. You are now just one click away from the Smoke-Off [which is also available from most file sharing networks as an MP3 sung by the author,] Hamlet [as heard on the street,] Numbers, and the Perfect High. For the curious, the perennial classic The Devil & Billy Markham was linked by Libby on lumpy way back on 4:20 of 2001. Now it's time to barbecue some burgers.
Doonces

Tuesday, July 2, 2002
Mouth mambo? Teeth for two?
Just click here and turn up those speakers.
saskadoon is in the room

Friday, June 28, 2002 03:47 p.m.
Just in time for NYC Gay Pride -- go check out Pink Steel, the gay heavy metal hair band!
Bang your Gnu

Friday, June 28, 2002 02:37 p.m.
Introducing yet another fascinating waste of time: it's interactive Word Association. Be sure to add to the knowledge base.
Slackgnu

Thursday, June 27, 2002 05:26 p.m.
Wow — check out the Amazon list of other books purchased by those who purchased the Nuge's book. Summer reading for aspiring Grand Wizards of the KKK...
Joshua-Nixon-Goldwater III

Thursday, June 27, 2002 10:55 a.m.
A much-needed cooking book from Ted Nugent, called "Kill It and Grill It." Shotgun comes seperately.

Wednesday, June 26, 2002 08:26 p.m.

Well I might have known it was a mistake to let my dog surf the web. I come home from work today and he has this bookmarked. Now he keeps talking about how this will fill the void in his life, how he always knew something was missing but he just couldn't put his paw on it. He's giving me the big guilt trip about how he was just a pup, he didn't understand what it was about, how I just did it without even asking HIS opinion. He even went so far as to imply that I fixed him to save money on the dog license! Says he needs to feel like a stud again.

Schappé

Wednesday, June 26, 2002 10:30 a.m.
Eighties Psychic Dance Party is now in the archives. Time for a new look. And it's damn hot out there -- makes me wish I could come to work in a bikini. Then again, that would mean having to see my coworkers in bikinis -- ok, forget that. I'll save the bikinis for home.

Anybody ever hear of ultimate fighting? It combines boxing, martial arts, wrestling, kickboxing -- 2 guys in a cage & everything's legal. They are nekkid except for tight shorts. They pummel the crap out of one another. And did I mention they're nekkid except for tight shorts? It's amazing & I'm very torn. On the one hand, it is gruesomely violent -- one guy was lying on his back on the floor and his opponent was straddling his chest while repeatedly punching him -- a succession of vicious bare handed lefts and rights, all to the guy's head. On the other hand, it is thrilling to watch -- the moves are amazing and the guys are so goddamn hot, grappling & slamming one another down. Phew. Definitely torn.

World Cup Update: It's Germany vs. Brazil for the championships! Condolences to Lena's peeps.

Sports Fan Gnu