-REALITY-

Saturday, May 12, 2001
Mood:Hyper-getting calmed
Weather:Warm&Sunny
Someone once told me that, in order to go out to take care of many of others, one must learn to take care of herself. I didn't really get the meaning of that saying quite straightly into my head when I heard that. But just up until a few weeks ago...The numerfous helpless faces had shocked me and made me wondered if it is right for me to sit here and be a material wasting student who is not even actively producing anything yet. I felt ashamed and worried. I felt that something must be done soon to help those people. I've called home and talked to my mom (who's also a really close friend to me ^^") about it...

She had just told me the exact same words I've put at the beginning of this entry. She asked me to think farther...if I cannot even support myself to live normally how am I suppose to go help others, and she told me that maybe I would feel like my avilability to helping the surrounding isn't as big as I feel I should take, but I have to learn first in order to make something big out of what I dream.

This is to myself and also a friend of mine, whom I am kind of worrying about right now. Maybe it's the best time to calm down and think over the prorities of the matters you are working on right now. The reason for me using the word prority instead of importance is that; when something's proitiy is placed in front of the other doesn't neccary means that it is more important. It is just that it comes first at this phase of your life. It comes first so it can become a stronger support of the important subject of your life later....

I really hope this would make a difference~~~~

~LoveSealed
Seattle

Tuesday, May 8, 2001
^_^ I finally have some time to translate the lyrics for that Angel and Dolphin song; but I am so tired ne~~~
Ok ok, so I am ganna type up the song and head to my sweet bed o_o
Btw, you can also go to my chinese blog to look up the lyrics in original language, it should be under the title of �V�g�o�C��!!!

Angel and dolphin

I am the angel,
a lonely angel with precious romantic dreams
the agnel likes to flie around the world
but she gets sad when her lost love is no where to be found
You are the dolphin,
loving in the world with no boundry
the dolphin likes to stare at the beautiful sky with rainbow
deep in his broken heart there's a precious memory of his long lost love.

as the angel is able to accept dolphin's broken heart
as the dolphin is able to understand angel's sadness for love
our affection for each other would become so valuable
that we left tears in the sweet blowing wind.

The angel really wants to learn how to swim
The dolphin dreams of flying into the sky

this kind of love may not seem to be easy to afford
but only you would make me want to do such things

the angel wants to give dolphin a kiss
but the ocean* is so deep and unpredicable

the dolphin wants to give angel a hug
but angel lives is so far so high

But only love can make this possible~


* Chinese people use ocean to metaphor love

~LoveSealed
Seattle

Sunday, May 6, 2001
Mood:~_~|||
Weather:nice & sunny
Just as I was wondering about the weird atmosphere from my friend's new bf, I saw myself in the mirror and realized that it was such a bad time to catch me with especially if you are not familiar with me. I was finishing working on my art mid-term project as they walked in my cluster. It was all unexpected even though I kinda had a feeling that they might be stopping by tonight since I missed them last night....I still felt kinda awkward to see them at this time after a long day~
~_~ The thing is...I'd become extremely quiet and slow when it comes to concerntrating my thinking in drawing.
The image I saw in the mirror is what I would call a "Henshin's Hitokiri's face" (remember from the manga when Kenshin's serious face couldn't get back to the normal amicable smile after he started fighting seriously again...) so yeah~ my friend's new bf just cuaght me with my scary serious looking face and probably is wondering about my odd attitude. ^^; (sorry ne~ I know I promise to act like my regular self, but it wasn't the right time =P)
****
Recently, I am very into this Madrian song titled "Angel and dolphin") kinda playing it over and over again on my player right now ^^~ maybe when I have the time I will have the lyrics translated and post it up here.
It's suppose to be a sweet song....kinda making me to have one of those fantacy right now ~_~||||

Ok...I think I will end this entry here with my fantanizing time~~

LoveSealed
Seattle

Thursday, May 3, 2001
Mood:#_#x
Weather:blueish sun-setting sky
This is an entry in response to the messages people have left concerning the entry posted on the 26th of April.
They were questioning the neutrality of homosexuals.First of all I want to say, this is just a conflict in judgement standards. No one is right no one is wrong (in fact, is there really right or wrong???). Everyone has their preference of what they want to believe in; so my response would just be an explaination of my view of point. I am not writing against anyone.
I want to begin this to ask you to think of one question. "Why do you fall in love; in another words, why do you love someone?" You like the person for who they are right? Ok who that person really is is all decided by the soul that lives inside of that body... some of you might want to say that appearance really makes things different.
Well, in my opinion the way a person's appearnce is all affected by the true self that's inside of our bodies. How so? It's simple, everyone knows that certain people with certain personality dress accordingly to their personality. And that person's temper effect their facial expression all the time, and the way the facial figure is presented is at least decided by they person's temper with 50%.
Ok, so that's where I got that people love someone for their soul and soul only. Anyways, that's my point. It is hard to understand why someone fall in love; sometimes they don't even know why. It just happen so natrually. It's the samething for heterosex, bisexual and homosexaul. They just happen to like the person. So to heterosex people it is natrual to like the opposite of sex. For the homosexual people it is natural to like someone who is the same sex with them....So it is all natural.. As long as you love the person with pure heart.....it's a natural and beautiful love......


~LoveSealed
Seattle

Thursday, May 3, 2001
Mood:*_*
Weather:nice and sunny, but still a little bit chill
^_^; haven't written an entry for days~lol that's because your busy friend is the middle of her mid-term's week. Time goes by really fast, hopefully all these will end soon and I can go on my summer and be happy ^o^"
(but it seems like the spring haven't make up its mind, keep coming and leaving unstably)

Oh yeah, and condtinue to talk about my favorite Anime seires at the moment(Shojo Kakumei Utena)It's not only the deep symbolism that are contained in the series that impress me, it is also the fancy sword fightings that also attracks me so much.
SWORD FIGHTING? yes, sowrd fighting ^^
In fact, most of the stories (not limited only in Anime, also novels and movies) that contain some sort of sword fighting would just push the bottom and makes me anxious every time I see it ^^;
The other anime that also makes me go crazy about the sword fighting is "Rurouni Kenshin"
Ah~Watching all the cool sword fighting anime just makes me dream of learning sowrd fighting.
T_T looks like it's never ganna happen, I still have a stack of Physics study waiting for me~ Jaa, I will just stop my nonsense entry here....and hopfully some people will be glad that I am back!

btw, did everyone go to the free scoop night? (Dunno if it's every where in the states)


~LoveSealed
Seattle

Thursday, April 26, 2001
Mood:excited
Weather:summerish

Just as I was blanking out while working on my English paper a couple nights ago; an inspiration came and excited my mind:
Loveing one means to love the person's soul, threfore, the sex, the money, nothing would matter if you really do love that person entirely; because loving someone is just loving someone; shouldn't be any limitation.

This is, perhaps, one of the most exciting inspiration that ever came to me; for many years I have been trying to understand what is it like to be involve with someone within the same sex. I have always see people being totally supportive toward the entire situation as someone would just totally oppose the idea and act hostile toward it.
****
Wathing the anime series "Shojo Kakumei Utena" gains me a lot of inspirations, Even though it does not focus on the homosexual relationship that obvious, but it definately display the harmony I shall see in their relationship. It is a strange ambiance story. A lot of things, subject, and characters perform with symbolism in there. It is until a few days ago I have realized and notice the second meaning of the title "Revolutionsary". "I promise you I will change the world." <--- that was one of my favorite line from the openning. I don't know exactly why but it always gives me a striking feeling.
Just a few days ago I was reading this article for my English composition class. It was a speech written by Virginia Woolf, an English women who lived the early 1900's. It was a speech about self-realization and how people should handle the sex difference differently. According to her that all of us, the human, have been concerntrating way too much on the meaning or traditional in making the man more manly, the woman more woman-ish. She said, perhaps, all of us should just unite the sex, forget about it, it only effect parts of our life. People need to free their mind from acting whoever they should, people should free their mind from the formatting of being someone.
This gave me intuition. Combining the two (Utena and WOolf) I have begun to realize that the "revolution" could be seen as getting rid of the tradition. In tradition people always think only the unite of a man and a woman can reach perfect harmony. THis isn't always true, when two are really in love with each other, sex shouldn't be the only factor....
^_^~ probably not a lot of people would agree with my daring thoughts here. I just want to point out the light and show people the path to the revolutionary world. A girl fighting to get to the path she's always wanted, she was fighting against the prince that has always been the shawdow and holding her back. Perhaps, it's time for the world to accept something new, something "more natural"!!!
Got anything to say, you are welcome to drop your opinion in my message bord, (locating on the very left)

~LoveSealed
Seattle

Tuesday, April 24, 2001
Mood: ambitious
Weather:SUnny, bright ,and loveley =)
~_~ ah, gracious, it was such a warm, sunny, lovely day!!! Among all the atmospheres I have deicded that the spring I have been waiting for awhile is finally here ^_^;;;
I was looking at my drawing after putting it up on a posting board and my emotions grew ambitious; I felt annoyed while noticing some off scaling in my drawing which didn't stand out until I looked at it in a distance. My interest in art didn't become obvious until my high school years. Before that, I have scattered memory about wanting to draw and working on inspirations within drawing when I was little...when I was little I would grab things and sketch it, and just work on it long period of time; when I was in junior high school, I would pay close attentions to all the drawings that was concidered inspirational to me, thinking about it, and just gain things from it; I still remember that my favorite thing to look at was eyes and the skies, it was ever thought as the hardest thing, but the most expressive thing to draw...anyhow, with all those conditionings, it didn't seem to be that obvious to me that art is something that always cheer me up and makes me amibtious until high school.
Anyways, just something poped-up while i was looking at the drawing. It wasn't all that crapy, but just stirke me with some thoughts. I haven't been having tha tmuch of ambitions in doing anything lately. Just kind of hanging around...but after this one afternoon, I think I know what to do, and I will achieve it with all my heart!!!

With all my heart
~LoveSealed
Seattle

Sunday, April 22, 2001
Mood:Chill
Weather:Cloudy, and sorta rainy
The dark clouds disapoint my hope for the spring ^_^x
I didn't get much done this evening, just hanging around and left my mind empty.It's always good to feel like doing nothing once in a while I suppose ^^. One of these days I just feel like taking to a walk on a country hill carring a cup of iced tea (or mocah, or whatever I feel like at the moment), just walk around. It would be great if there's tones of bright sping-ish green grass, fresh and reflect the sky perfectly. Nice, warmly heated air....find a place to sit down...aand maybe it is at night....the hills bcome dark as the stars turns out bright and clear...
People may wonder about my dealing with the stars; I don't know if any of you had just gone out and lay under the clear star-ie sky. I have ever heard a saying of how each stars is suppose to be the light to each soul...some people always have looked and wondered which of the star might be his/hers..That usually isn't the main reason for me looking up to the sky. I usually look at it just for the graceful feeling it delivers to me. WIth some reason, it gives me a calm and peaveful feeling each time I look at it. And that feeling is not always the same. It also gives me dreams and fantacy....
^_^x I haven't look up at the stars and wondered...for a long time....maybe I shall go ahead and do that sometimes...even on my balcony.... (*Smile) just the cherish brilliant stars accompany with my soul... nothin' else...


~LoveSealed
Seattle

Sunday, April 22, 2001
Mood:At ease~
Weather:Ah~ Sunny Day
I have a special annoucement!!!
See the "REALITY" lyrics??? I have the link up for downloading...all you need to do is to go there and click on the title (REALITY) should pop up something asking you about downloading...I won't leave it up here long...just for a week or so, for the people who are interested in hearing that song =)
Hope you will like it as I do. =�
Today has nice to me, I got a lot of things done...and i am satisfied that i finally found a really nice master drawing for my art project~ It's a little bit hard to make it all perfect, but I enjoy doing it a lot =P
Is anyone making up plans for this summer yet? I just found out last night that I will be going on a fun trip for at least a month! Really can't wait to see my friends and relatives =P
Oh ho ho ~
I am in such a good mood that I don't think I can finish writing this entry >_< I will just leave it here...

~LoveSealed
Sealtte

Friday, April 20, 2001
Mood:^_^x
Weather: warmer, but kind of dark
Hello~ I am back, did anyone miss me? ^_^;
SOrry about last night, I meant to put on an entry a day, but my sickness did not allow me to do so. Sickness? It's not that serious, I just had a cold, and it has been treating me with weird behavior (just like the spring weather here...it would be nice for a while, then it will get worse again *_*) Today is friday, dunno what everybody's plan is? I still have a lot of homework to do...(mostly are physics....) well since saturday has been determined to be my fun day, I shall go and finish my homework at once and hopfully I will return here to share my thoughts again~~ byeeeeee


~LoveSealed
Seattle

Wednesday, April 18, 2001
Mood: =( frustrated and getting a worse cold
Weather:Nice and sunny
Just finished doing my "very challenging" physics homework. It's due in 35 minutes and I still have one problem unfigured. I have been dealing with it in most of my spare time today, and my cold is getting worse so I call it off. Forget about it, it won't hurt my grade that much and I still have get my text book read anyways, I need to go back and read the book closely and make sure that I got all the concepts understood...maybe I can, and I will try to give it a try later.
****>BR? I need to confess a feeling. A feeling for a long lost friend. It's for someone who just passed away in an accident just a couple of weeks before. Even though I didn't even know him that well, but I have, in the past, had a several social connections with him...sigh It has been a while, and the subject has been touched so many times by so many people around me. But I never felt as deep as I do about it tonight....
I do know that every moment, there's people dying, babies being born...I also know it well that death is one of the process of the life, indeed, the very last process. Without it a life cannot be complete...I also do know that I should look at it just as same as the birth. But i just can't.

In many aspects, I do believe in next lives. I dunno, I don't even know what i am talking about here...I should just forget it and end my long day by going to bed....

who's like totally brain dead the entire day T_T

Seattle

Wednesday, April 18, 2001
Mood:Sleepy
^_^ I am back here trying to capture some thoughts again... Just reread what I wrote earlier today, (wait, should be last evening...it's already 12AM)And found out that i forgot to talk about the lyrics which I added to the bottom of Utena's picture.
I have never heard the original version of this song, in fact, it is kind of ironic that the version I have been litsenning to is sang by this Taiwanese singer - Harlem Yu (whom can be concider as one of my fav. singer from tw)...
Anyhow, the dreamy style of the song caught a lot of attention from me when I first heard it from a music vedio at home....I really liked the lyrics. Especially the part it says "Dreams are my reality...." it sounds sort of escaping, but I like it, I really do think that at a certain degree...human tempt to create their own fantacy and call it reality...
Just look around, so many creations were invented under the influence of a sort of drea, (if human never dream of flying, there wouldn't be airplanes in the world.)SO I say we can pretty much say that the world we have been living in is based on many fantacies...(built under the influence of fantacies...)

Indeed, we all are creatures living within a dream, sleep with fantacies...seeing, feeling, and even breathing some sort of iluusive ideas........and most of the time we do call it REALITY~

~LoveSealed who is not making much sense here ^_^|||

Seattle

Tuesday, April 17, 2001
Mood: edo....
Weather:insantly unstable!
It has been a strange day, very strange indeed, in terms of both the weather and the mood I held...
****
In spite of the weird mood from last night, I woke up this morning with a calmed and peaceful mind...just as how the sky was.
but the next thing I know was some odd strong rainning pulling out from the sky....and a few minutes later...the sky was clear again as I walked to attend my art class. The art class was kinda frustrating today...I dunno why but i just can't set my mind to draw...
Then as I stepped out of that class, it start to rain unreasonably again....so I took a short walk in the rain...rather dramatic to me...because of the rain, I sort of get into a crouchy mood as I entered the room. However, after I went down and get dinner...the sky was glouriously sunny and clear again....weird ne~~~


~LoveSealed
Seattle

Monday, April 16, 2001
Mood: Lonely
Weather:Bad, windly, rainy....
Yes, I know that I already did wrote an entry earlier this evening, but it seems that laterthe night the more I feel like writing and sharing.
I just had a few conversations with my friends...online and offline...talking about the hard stuff - relationship.
I know I haven't been involve that much lately. Things are just going smoothe with me. I am satisfied.
But...it's just that sometime somehow somewhat that I have this empty feeling. I will be with hang out with a bunch of friends...we will all be laughing and having fun, but at certain times I felt my heart is empty.
******
I know to many people, I have talked about "sealing the heart up" and grow cold toward this whole thing about "love". (Feel weird using this word). But I guess I have been lying to myself the whole time. This whole time...I just...not very sure of what I want I guess.
sigh
dunno why I am thinking about this all the sudden, the thoughts aren't even organized, they are so scattered...maybe it's the sickness...maybe it's me...maybe..maybe it's the weather.

Maybe it's the cloudy sky covering calling the lonely heart with a empty display of shining stars....


maybe I should just turn off the computer and go to bed...



~LoveSealed

Seattle

Monday, April 16, 2001
Feeling for the day:warm<
Weather:dry & cloudy
^_^! wow, there has been a couple visitors already...
Hope I didint' scare them away, lol
Even though the sky is pretty cloudy today, but I can smell spring in the air
The day is pretty bright, all the flowers, animals, and..people *_*
I have been cravying for getting a new piece of music for myself, but since there are so many choice, I don't really know which one I am going to end up getting.
But since I am planning on going back to Taiwan, where I came from (yes according to the US immigration status, I am an alien), I probably will just get my music over there
less than 2 more months...
*****

Hmmm...
I haven't really done any self introducing here haven't I?
Well, I was born in Taiwan, the little island that was claimed to be part of China all the time, but it really doesn't belong to China.=P
I lived there until I was 14, and then I came here to the US and have been living here ever since. There isn't musch going on in my life right now, but I like the way it is =)
....I haven't been really settling on one goal yet,
it is hard for me to decide what to do, but I am concidering psychology at the moment,
but who knows, I alreayd have been changing my mind so many times that I can't even keep up with them, but hopfully I will be able to figure something out this summer....


~LoveSealed
Seattle

Sunday, April 15, 2001
Feeling for the day: spacy
Weather:nice&sunny
^^; hi hi~ How's it going peepz! This is my first entry put on here at Pitas.com
took me a while to decide on the page layout.
=)
well, since I am not very experience in web page design and lazy as well, I have decided to give it a simple look and just stick with it And I end up choosing one of my favorite character, Utena as my main image....actually i used it to represent my personal..self-image...

why ne?
ummm ; ^_^ maybe you will find out as you read on my entries lol
Then there's the title...

it didn't take me long to come up with the title This title "Love Sealed" or "Sealed Love" is given when I had to thik of one for my Chinese blog.

;;;;; I can't really tell the reason,
but it's definately something meaningful to me.
Yep yep, *_* well I have been working on this page since 3pm I guess it's time to give my eyes some rests. ^_^!

Jaane~
oh yeah, forgot to write down my purpose...
The purpose of this page is to...communicate with my friends
close friends, internet pals...etc...
Just a place to share personal insight....



~LoveSealed

Seattle