SUPERMAN :: MONDAY 1.1.01 :: 3:10 AM

Listening to: Three Doors Down, Kryptonite [English music o.O;;;], Glay, various songs HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!! Listening to Kryptonite by Three Doors Down. This song will forever be one of my favorite English songs since I spent seven hours with it in a video editing lab, staring bleary eyed at fuzzy screens of Air Force ROTC footage for the corps Fall 2000 music video. I'm very proud of the finished product, nonetheless. ^_^ (Random Utena thought at 3 in the morning: I think Kryptonite describes the Touga/Saionji relationship really well, if you think of the singer as Touga and the person he is speaking to as Saionji. It doesn't matter what happens now and then As long as you'll be my friend at the end... You stumbled in and bumped your head If not for me then you'd be dead... If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman If I'm alive and well will you be there holding my hand I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might Kryptonite Freaky, ne? I have a sudden urge to do a video for this song, but I don't have the equipment now >< Maybe when I actually get enough money to buy editing equipment of my own. Editing is FUN. At least, I want to do a webpage layout or songfic or something. *sigh* early morning/late night inspiration is always the worst.) It's so WEIRD to think that this is a new year already...the last time I checked, it was June 2000 and I was dreading another semester of classes...time sure flies, doesn't it? Another year is upon us, and while I don't really believe in making New Year's Resolutions, I do have some things I hope to accomplish this year: - Prioritize. Find out what's important to me and step into life with a clearer vision. - Stop procrastinating. I'm the world's biggest procrastinator, and it's only been hurting my grades and my performance. - Enjoy life. I get depressed very easily, and I've decided that it's pointless. I need to stop taking everything so seriously, step back, take a look at the big picture, and be thankful for what I do have. - Become a more dedicated cadet. I've been slacking off in ROTC because of several reasons, and I think that while it might be painful to plunge back into the new semester with a dedication I don't feel I can maintain, I also believe that if you really love something, you'll do it with all your heart. I love ROTC, and I can't let my personal feelings towards anything that happened get in the way. - Become a stronger person in general and be proud of what I do. This stems from all the above reasons. - Listen to more Jrock ^_~ - Improve my writing! ^_^ It's time for me to go to bed, so I'll leave you all on a happier and inspirational note with which to greet the new year: ------------------ Motto! Motto! Thrill ni okasareta karada wo hikizutte Tobikomu no sa New York surikireru made Joushiki to unmei wo keri-age isshun ni kakete miru Mesawari na beam! Ano taiyou ubaitsukuse! More! More! With this body full of thrill I'll dive into New York until I'm worn away I'll bet all on one moment, forgetting the annoying beam Of common sense and fate! I'll capture everything under the sun! Soshite ore wa atarashii jiyuu ni te wo kaketa... So I'll raise my hands towards new freedom... ------------------ New freedom...remember that. Happy 2001! ~Ger

...AND MORE SAIONJI :: SUNDAY 12.31.00 :: 2:40 AM

Listening to: Malice Mizer, Regret Happy New Year's Eve! ^_^ I SHOULD be in bed right now...*sigh* Posted my first Utena fanfic to my fanfiction page. And yes, it is a Saionji fanfic *glares pointedly at QS*. There isn't enough Student Council fanfiction in general, so I thought I'd add to the list. It's not really anything substantial, but I think it came out better than I expected. Let me know what you guys think! ^^ I wrote the whole thing listening to Malice Mizer's "Regret" on repeat on winamp, a very beautiful piano solo by (former) vocalist Camui Gackt. Highly recommend it for writing angsty Utena fics. ^_~ And now I am going to bed...*totters off* ~Ger

SAIONJI KYOUCHI :: SATURDAY 12.30.00 :: 12:38 AM

Listening to: Fushigi Yuugi, Blue Eyes Blue ...WHAT???? o.O;;;; Now listening to: DNAngel, Natsu no Yoru no Yume Much better ^^;;; New layout! The fanfiction page got a revamp so I decided to redo the blog as well. Featuring the great and powerful Saionji Kyouchi-sama from Shoujo Kakumei Utena *worships* On a tangent: did anyone know that Lazy Knack was actually a jpop band that disbanded a few years ago? Well, more a group than a band. It was made up of two teenage boys who released a huge number of singles, Natsu no Yoru no Yume being one of them. I confess to being a bit too curious last night and ordered the single. ^^;; hee. I usually don't go for jpop but I really like this song. I went with my dad and brother to see the Chinese film Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon today. It's a martial arts film from China starring Chow Yun Fat, and it's pretty good. Very angsty, especially at the end. ^_^ Not much else went on today...I'm very hungry though. *goes to find food* ~Ger

NAKAGO :: FRIDAY 12.29.00 :: 2:57 AM PM

Listening to: Chisato Moritaka, Snow Again Here are the results from the The Fushigi Yuugi Character Resemblance Test, which I just took several minutes ago. ...I think this speaks for itself *points to list and backs away slowly from Nakago* ^^;;;;;;;; # 1 Nakago # 2 Seiryuu # 3 Ashitare # 4 Miboshi # 5 Chiriko # 6 Suzaku # 7 Tomo # 8 Yui Hongo # 9 Soi # 10 Tama-neko # 11 Amiboshi # 12 Chichiri # 13 Keisuke Yuuki # 14 Mitsukake # 15 Suboshi # 16 Hotohori # 17 Tasuki # 18 Miaka Yuuki # 19 Tamahome # 20 Nuriko

HELLCAT FLIGHT :: THURSDAY 12.28.00 :: 6:39 PM

Listening to: L'Arc~en~Ciel, The Fourth Avenue Cafe, Snow Drop and other songs by the world's best band ^_~ *points* What I WISH we got here in Houston...snow. Heh. WARNING: Air Force rambling below...this is just kind of for my own benefit and for that of ROTC people who might read this blog. If you don't get it, don't worry. ^_^ Hmm. Well, Simmons sent the email and the AFROTC Detachment 825 AS200 class is officially Hellcat flight. I voted for Shadow flight, but I don't mind Hellcat. The only problem with that is the Hellcat is a Navy plane, and we are Air Force ROTC. *blinks* I always seem to be stuck with aircraft from other services. My first AS100 semester I was in the Charlie Comanches, and the Comanches is an Army helicopter. I had some sketchy ideas for Shadow flight for flight t-shirts and guide on and what not, but Hellcat is going to be a hell (no pun intended ^^;;) of a lot cooler AND harder to design. And a lot of fun, if I and my other flight mates can drop the whole soap opera thing and make POP work. ^^;;; The really nice thing is that Boris is going to be DOT and he knows pretty much what's going on. Besides the fact that I'm pretty good friends with him (no, that doesn't have anything to do with it at all! ^_~) I definitely think we'll be a whole lot better than last spring's POP with being prepared, but as they say, prepared or not, you still go to camp. *shrug* I just want to get something out of POP and camp. Camp's going to be hard, but I think it's also going to be a hell of a lot of fun. Though PT will suck...hopefully POP PT will get me in shape for that too. OK, I'm really rambling now... End Air Force rambling. Part 2 of the Tokyo Babylon fic is posted. Arigatou to Laurel for reading and commenting! (I still think you're being too nice ^_^). Sorry about the fanfic rant below...just had to stick it somewhere where I wouldn't get flamed for what I wanted to say. Stupid ML. QS, where are you? I haven't seen you online today! I spent most of the night last night writing up Japanese music reviews to some of my favorite artists and anime. There are 4 pages in all: Jrock, Jpop, Anime, and Seiyuu. The Seiyuu page isn't up yet but the other three links are in the "obsesive lists" section in the left side of the blog. The lists are kind of meant to guide people who don't know much about Japanese music and/or are browsing through my giant mp3 list. Maybe if I put on a sweatshirt, I wouldn't be so cold...*thinks* And who turned off the heat?!?!? ~Ger, fingers turning blue

THE SAKURA TREE :: THURSDAY 12.28.00 :: 4:27 AM

Listening to: Okiayu Ryoutarou, Ume no na Hashi It's 4:30 in the damn morning and I think I'm sick >< *sigh* Ah, well. Laurel and Lyra, thank you for beta-ing the TB fic! Redrival's down so I can't do anything with it at the moment, but if you want to read it the link is here. Be warned that it's not one of those sappy SubaruXSeishirou fics that most of the TB fanfic-dom is made of. I've been quite upset with yaoi anime fandom in general these past few weeks, for reasons that QS knows ^^;; Which brings me to my main point of discussion. On the Tokyo Babylon fanfiction list live a couple of creatures known as "rabid Sub/Sei fans" and most of the fanfic on the list to date has been sappy love stories. I'm a great fan of Tokyo Babylon and X, but there's a point when things start getting out of hand. Not to mention I'm not a romantic person at all, but y'all probably already know that...I usually lurk on the TBFFML, deleting posts when necessary, but there's been a very disturbing thread which I found both amusing and very sad at the same time. Basically the discussion is about the Sakurazukamori's sakura tree (no, not corpse tea! ^_~) I'm sure all of you have heard the theory (fan-based, I'm assuming) that the TREE is the true culprit of TB and not Seishirou himself. That the Tree holds Seishirou's emotions and if he could only win over the tree, he would receive his emotions back and go back to being the Very Nice Person that he was originally intended to be. First of all, this theory makes me upset because nowhere does it mention in the manga that the tree is actually sentient. Yes, I believe that the Tree is somewhat aware of Seishirou's doings. Yes, I know for a fact that the Tree feeds on the blood of the corpses underneath...that's a given. But how did this get to the point where the tree is now actually a living, sentient being? I don't find any point of evidence to back this up. Secondly, Seishirou is heartless because...well, he just is. He enjoys being the Sakurazukamori and killing for a living. It's not the Tree. It's in his blood, his lineage, and he's been trained since a young child. Think of him as Heero Yuy, Fujimiya Aya, and Nakago combined. A very scary combination. However, Heero, Aya, and Nakago all have that one spark of humanity which keeps them alive. Seishirou doesn't have that. CLAMP created him to be either less or more than human, depending how you look at it, and he's not meant to mirror humanity. Seishirou is a creation onto his own, and I'm sorry, but he doesn't have any feelings for Subaru. And it's not the tree's fault; it's his own. Somewhere along the way, Seishirou lost his soul because he forgot what it was to be human, and the whole point of TB was to give himself a chance to try to regain that soul. Except he never really gave himself a chance. It was all a game, and he never gave the real effort. In the end, it's still up to Seishirou to change himself. Now that we've established that, the real point of this post goes back to the Subaru/Seishirou fangirls who, I'm assuming, are pulling out all the stops in order to find a basis for this relationship which doesn't exist in Tokyo Babylon. I'm not sure if it does or doesn't in X. Subaru and Seishirou don't interact on a very frequent basis in X anyway, and they've had a couple years apart from each other to think things through. I think the relationship with Subaru in X is more of a power struggle, wheras in TB it was a need for domination on one man's part. But neither domination nor power struggles equal love. As long as Seishirou remains the heartless Sakurazukamori and Subaru remains the 13th head of the Sumeragi, there won't be any relationship, period. It's not justified in either series, and I am SO TIRED of people making relationships when they aren't there. *rubs eyes* That rant applies to Gundam Wing also, which is where my real frustration lies. There's so much literary potential within that series for great fics, and yet everything that's been written for GW has been for yaoi or shounen-ai romance. What a waste. FY and WK and other series I can stand, because the yaoi fics don't outnumber the stories that actually deal with the actual series material itself. But other series...it's insane. TB, yes, is a semi-shounen-ai series, but it's not about love! It's about deceit and deception, obsession and the good and evil which lie within the human soul. Not about warm fuzzy feelings or graphic sex. >< Now that I have ranted and raved for a good half hour about the declining quality of anime fanfiction, I think I'm going to bed. *hacks up mucus* ~Ger

HAPPY HOLIDAYS :: WEDNESDAY 12.27.00 :: 9:29 AM

Listening to: Luna Sea, Forever and Ever *blinks* Wow, I haven't updated this in two days. Christmas was nice...Laurel, thank you so much for the Tokyo Babylon! And everyone else who got me presents...^_^ We had some guests over but overall it was a quiet holiday. I wrote my first Tokyo Babylon fic yesterday, the first part of a 3 part trilogy thingy. I'll post a link to it after my beta-readers (Laurel) get back to me. I'm now addicted to Luna Sea's Forever and Ever, which is a gorgeous slow ballad-type song in the tradition of X Japan. By that, I mean, long (10:25), with long guitar and drum solo, and a (I'm guessing it's Ryuichi) talking voice-over. If you haven't heard the song, it's wonderful. Hope everyone's Christmas was fun-filled and good! Moonsong-neesan, feel better! ~Ger

ARCHITECT RATIONAL :: SUNDAY 12.24.00 :: 11:30 PM

Listening to: L'Arc~en~Ciel, Vivid Colors Feeling: Pleasantly surprised Why pleasantly surprised? you ask. It's all Tin's fault...she took that Keirsey Temperament test and posted the results on her blog and made me insatiably curious, so I had to take it too. And boy were the results weird. Take a look: Your Temperament is: Rational (NT) Your Variant Temperament is: Architect iNTp Portrait of the Architect Rational (INTP) All Rationals (NTs) share the following core characteristics: Rationals tend to be pragmatic, skeptical, self-contained, and focused on problem-solving and systems analysis. Rationals pride themselves on being ingenious, independent, and strong willed. Rationals make reasonable mates, individualizing parents, and strategic leaders. Rationals are even-tempered, they trust logic, yearn for achievement, seek knowledge, prize technology, and dream of understanding how the world works. Architects need not be thought of as only interested in drawing blueprints for buildings or roads or bridges. They are the master designers of all kinds of theoretical systems, including school curricula, corporate strategies, and new technologies. For Architects, the world exists primarily to be analyzed, understood, explained—and re-designed. External reality in itself is unimportant, little more than raw material to be organized into structural models. What is important for Architects is that they grasp fundamental principles and natural laws, and that their designs are elegant, that is, efficient and coherent. Architects are rare—maybe one percent of the population—and show the greatest precision in thought and speech of all the types. They tend to see distinctions and inconsistencies instantaneously, and can detect contradictions no matter when or where they were made. It is difficult for an Architect to listen to nonsense, even in a casual conversation, without pointing out the speaker’s error. And in any serious discussion or debate Architects are devastating, their skill in framing arguments giving them an enormous advantage. Architects regard all discussions as a search for understanding, and believe their function is to eliminate inconsistencies, which can make communication with them an uncomfortable experience for many. Ruthless pragmatists about ideas, and insatiably curious, Architects are driven to find the most efficient means to their ends, and they will learn in any manner and degree they can. They will listen to amateurs if their ideas are useful, and will ignore the experts if theirs are not. Authority derived from office, credential, or celebrity does not impress them. Architects are interested only in what make sense, and thus only statements that are consistent and coherent carry any weight with them. Architects often seem difficult to know. They are inclined to be shy except with close friends, and their reserve is difficult to penetrate. Able to concentrate better than any other type, they prefer to work quietly at their computers or drafting tables, and often alone. Architects also become obsessed with analysis, and this can seem to shut others out. Once caught up in a thought process, Architects close off and persevere until they comprehend the issue in all its complexity. Architects prize intelligence, and with their grand desire to grasp the structure of the universe, they can seem arrogant and may show impatience with others who have less ability, or who are less driven. At first I was going "what?" because I've never thought of myself as very rational. But the further I read the more I started going..."wow...creepy...that's me." Especially the second and third "architect" paragraphs, which describe me in every sense of the word. ESPECIALLY the third paragraph ^^;;; I'm probably one of the most arrogant and introverted people you'll ever meet. Quite scary. Hmm...I WANNA HAMBURGER!!!!! >< ~Ger

O HOLY NIGHT :: SUNDAY 12.24.00 :: 8:42 AM

Listening to: B'z, One Talking to: QS, about various Gundam pairings and fic ideas ^^;; Ah...just being able to get out of bed feels nice. My parents made me get up and go to church this morning and halfway through the service i started feeling really crappy again. I went to bed right when I got home at noon and woke up at about 8 PM. Heh. Other than that it's been a rather boring Christmas Eve. I expect with all the sleep I've been getting (I calculated that between Friday, Saturday, and today that I've gotten about 30 hours of sleep in 2 days. Insane or what?) I'm going to be staying up rather late tonight. Not that I mind. It doesn't feel like Christmas. Not that Christmas has a "feel," but it just feels like a regular weekend. My parents are having guests over tomorrow, so maybe that will make it more "Christmas-y" here. It's rather peaceful actually...I'm talking to some ROTC people online and they sound really excited. I wonder why? *hides* Ah...more of the AS200 class soap opera. I'm thinking things will really pick up with that once we get back to the spring semester and POP. Can't wait *dies* Right now I'm starving....what to eat...? *wanders off in search of not-so-healthy food* ~Ger, who still wants a hamburger