Friday, December 30, 2005 09:17 a.m.

Each year, during the last week in December, I try to post a list of my favorite music releases of the past 12 months. Here are my choices for 2005:

Josh Rouse: Nashville
Fruit Bats: Spelled In Bones
Feist: Let It Die
Johnny Cash: The Legend (box set)
The Posies: Every Kind of Light
Devendra Banhart: Cripple Crow
Burr Johnson: Traveler
Oranger: New Comes and Goes
Death Cab For Cutie: Plans
Seu Jorge: The Life Aquatic Studio Sessions
Fiona Apple: Extraordinary Machine

Here are a couple of older releases that I spent a lot of time with in 2005 and highly recommend:

David Crosby: If I Could Only Remember My Name
Miles Davis: Live-Evil

I would love to see your lists/hear your recommendations for more good listening, if you feel like sending them.

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Wednesday, December 28, 2005 07:44 p.m.

The baby has apparently decided to stay inside of me for a while longer. I was convinced that something was going to happen on Monday night after a full day of cramping and pressure... but alas, it was not to be. I guess it's a good idea to let the baby cook until she's completely done, but I am so eager to have her OUT!

Ever since the cramping incident, I haven't been able to feel her move around as much as usual. So today I went for something called a "non-stress test," which involved strapping monitors to my belly in order to evaluate the baby's heart rate and movements. Everything is A-OK. So now I just need to sit back and wait some more. Patience has never been one of my strong points.

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Monday, December 26, 2005 04:52 p.m.

First of all, how freakin' cute is this?

Christmas was fun but hectic this year. T and I drove down to Tuxedo on Saturday afternoon, hung out at my mother's place for a while, then went over to my aunt and uncle's new house to celebrate the holidays with my father's side of the family. Copious amounts of delicious food were consumed and a good time was had by all. We spent the first half of Sunday opening gifts at my mother's house and playing with Eliza and Zoe:

We left Tuxedo shortly after 3 PM and hauled ass back up to Albany in order to clean the house and prepare dinner for T's brother Kevin. He came over around 7 PM and we had even more good eats and spent a mellow evening with him. By the time he left, I was absolutely exhausted.

Today I have been in bed dealing with what can only be described as an intense feeling of cramping and pressure in my lower abdomen and legs. I called my OB office just to make sure it was nothing to worry about, and the nurse told me that I am feeling the baby drop down into position. In other words, she is preparing herself for the journey and I could go into labor at any time now. Bring it on! I'm as ready as I'm ever going to be.

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Thursday, December 22, 2005 07:44 a.m.

I have definitely reached the uncomfortable final phase of pregnancy. I am tempted to fill this page with complaints, but I'm trying really hard to remain positive right now so I won't. Suffice it to say that I am huge and out-of-sorts and very much looking forward to going into labor and meeting our daughter and moving on to the next phase of this adventure. Yes, I am still a wee bit frightened about the labor and the birth because I have no idea how it will go down... the bomb could drop at any time now and I have absolutely no idea when it is going to happen ... but with each passing day, I get a little less scared and a little more hopeful that "today will be the day." I am technically 3.5 weeks away from my due date, but I really hope I go early. Check out the belly, folks:

Amazingly, I am completely finished with my Christmas-related errands. All gifts have been purchased and wrapped. T and I even had time to set up and decorate a tree amongst the chaos. Here it is. Notice my big 'ole belly in the foreground and T in the background (and the pigsty on the coffee table):

We're heading down to Tuxedo on Saturday morning to spend Christmas Eve and half of Christmas Day with my family. I'm looking forward to watching how my adorable little nieces react (they were a bit too young to appreciate Christmas last year). We are driving back up to Albany on Sunday afternoon and having T's brother Kevin over to our place for dinner and revelry (well, as much revelry as this pregnant, grumpy lady can handle) that night. Should be a nice weekend.

Happy holidays everyone!

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Thursday, December 8, 2005 09:50 p.m.

42 days and counting! I am so ready for this pregnancy thing to be over... and at the same time, I am so not ready. I feel joyous, anxious, excited, terrified... pretty much every emotion a human being can possibly feel all at once. I am simultaneously calm and stressed out (I know that doesn't make any logical sense, but I'm pretty sure anyone who's ever been pregnant understands me perfectly).

We have made progress on the new house, but there is still much to be done and that's one of the things that is causing me stress. Pregnant women have a crazy "nesting" urge that kicks in during the third trimester, which causes us to want to organize and sterilize every household object in sight. I am unable to completely satisfy this urge because so many of our belongings are still buried in boxes and garbage bags... and until we find the time to build some shelves and otherwise maximize our available storage space, we have nowhere to put any of them. We have had somewhere to be almost every single night after work... a childbirth class, a day care center, holiday shopping... and by the time we arrive home at night, we are both tired and don't have the energy to tackle any of the big projects. This is why part of me wishes my due date wasn't looming so large. I would love to have an extra couple of months to get everything in order around the house and really settle in. Because I am a perfectionist by nature and tend to be really hard on myself, I am having a difficult time accepting that everything won't be 100% in order by the time our baby makes her grand entrance.

Another issue that is causing me anxiety: I have decided that I don't really like one of the obstetricians I have been seeing. There are two in the practice and either one could deliver my baby... it depends upon who is on call when I go into labor. I am beginning to regret not having switched to a different practice earlier on in the pregnancy. It makes no sense to switch this late in the game, and I wouldn't have enough time to get comfortable with a new doctor even if I did. I feel confident that whoever delivers my baby will do so in as safe and professional a manner as possible... but I really wish I felt more comfortable about the way in which my questions are being addressed. Fortunately, I have been doing a lot of independent reading/research so I have been able to find alternate resources.

I have a lot more to say on this subject, but I've run out of time for today. I'll try to post another entry soon, with pictures. My mother and stepmother are throwing me a baby shower this coming Sunday and I'm sure they'll both have their cameras out.

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