Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Happy Halloween!
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Thursday, October 26, 2006
There is almost nothing worse than listening to your child cry herself to sleep... and take fucking forever to actually pass out.
Piper has always been a pretty decent sleeper. Nine times out of ten, putting her down is a piece of cake. Occasionally, though, the afternoon nap is a struggle. I can tell she's exhausted, but she doesn't want to go... I'll put her in the crib, and she'll start to cry immediately. Today is one of those days. As I type this, she is screaming at the top of her lungs... her face is beet red, there are tears and snot everywhere, she looks so sad, and I feel like my heart is being ripped out of my chest. I know I'm doing the right thing by letting her "cry it out," though. I am convinced that if T and I become her bitches (pick her up everytime she cries in the crib, rock her to sleep in our arms each and every time), bad habits will be formed and we will all be even more miserable as a result. Even so, I still really hate this part of the process.
Poor T has been up every night this week dealing with a night-waking problem Piper seems to have recently developed (he's the "night person" and I'm the "morning person"... the cut-off is 5 AM). It seems to have come out of nowhere... for the past five months, she has slept straight through the night with only the very occasional problem. She is teething, but not to the extent that it would be waking her up every night, like clockwork. Per the advice of the pediatrician, we have started letting her "cry it out" during these episodes as well...and quite frankly, I don't know who suffers more: her or us. It's impossible to sleep while your child is screaming her lungs out on the other side of your bedroom wall, and very difficult to just lie there and let it continue as well.
I'm hoping that after a few more days of crying, Piper will have the self-soothing concept mastered and we can resume our comparatively peaceful existence.
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Wednesday, October 18, 2006
My back is acting up again. My most recent cortisone injection was on August 29th, so it's been a good run: almost 2 months of feeling better. When I say "better," I mean that the problem has never completely disappeared but that I have been able to get through the day without cringing in pain and/or over-compensating for the discomfort by contorting my body into completely unnatural postions. It has been recommended that I continue to get these shots every three months... which means that I have several weeks of acute pain to endure before I am eligible for my next one. I am on the fence about this method of pain management, though. While it seems to be working for me, the procedure is really creepy... several huge needles of pharmaceuticals are injected into my spinal column while I lie on my stomach, unable to see anything that is going on, feeling panicky and uncomfortable and paranoid. It doesn't help that I am required to sign a scary waiver before each visit that includes words such as "nerve damage," "paralysis," and "possibly, death." I'm just not sure that I want to keep putting myself through this because... what if????
My neighbor, coincidentally, is suffering from a similar problem. She recently gave me a photocopied packet of exercises that are supposed to help alleviate pain such as we are experiencing. It's a lovely thought, but am I really going to perform three different versions of the Sun Salutation on a regular basis, often enough to feel a difference? No. Am I just being lazy? No. I've got a tiny kid who demands all of me, all day long... who cries and clings to my leg every time I take a few steps away from her. I am very active, every day. Piper and I take long walks outside, and I regularly use a treadmill if/when she naps. Am I being cynical/pessimistic? Possibly... but I'm also being realistic. I know myself, and I know that I won't do these exercises often enough to make them matter.
I'm not sure what I am going to do about this problem, or why I'm even mentioning it here, except that I feel the need to vent. I never in a million years thought that I would be suffering from such a painful physical problem at the tender age of 34. Have any of you gone through something similar? Know someone who has? Comments/suggestions are most welcome.
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Monday, October 16, 2006
T and I made it to Cooperstown! We had a very fun, relaxing weekend. Our "bed & breakfast" was beautiful, the autumn leaves were at their peak, and we caught a nice buzz at Brewery Ommegang (we've been wanting to visit it for years). Here are a few shots we took during the trip:
Today was back to business as usual with Piper, but I missed her a lot over the weekend so it didn't really seem like the same old routine. Funny how much I was looking forward to a break from her, but as soon as we were separated I couldn't wait to see her again...
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Thursday, October 12, 2006
T and I are going to attempt a visit to Cooperstown, NY again this weekend. My mother has kindly agreed to watch Piper for a few days, so I am driving down to Tuxedo today to settle her in/drop her off. As chronicled here, the Cooperstown trip we originally planned was sabotaged by the worst illness of my life... so I am really hoping that we actually make it out of town this time. Wish us luck!
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