Wednesday, August 23, 2006

It was a beautiful day today, so Piper and I took a blanket and some toys to the park so that we could enjoy some fresh air and sunshine. Two little girls, who looked like they hadn't had a bath in over a week, were curious about the baby and came over to see what we were doing. They asked me a bunch of questions ("Is that YOUR baby?" "How old is she?" etc.) and before long, they had settled in and made themselves at home on our blanket. I asked them if they were at the park with their mother, and the younger one told me that their father was watching them. She motioned to a park bench several yards away, where a man was passed out with a ball cap pulled over his face.

Piper and I spent about 30 minutes with the young sisters. I let them both hold her, which they loved. They asked for a pen and paper and wrote me cute little notes. When I showed them my camera phone, they went nuts! Eventually, Piper started fussing and it was time to head home. The girls helped me pack up the stroller and asked me when I was coming back. Their father didn't move once the entire time they were with me.

For some reason, I was really touched by this encounter. The girls were so sweet and playful and had so much fun interacting with Piper... it makes me sad to think about what life at home might be like for them. I also feel particularly lucky to be where I am in my life and to have this time to spend with my baby.

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Monday, August 14, 2006

Tomorrow afternoon I have an appointment with a pain management doctor, who is going to inject drugs into my back... which will hopefully help to alleviate the horrible pain I have been feeling, almost non-stop, for the past six months. Due to some mishaps with our insurance coverage, I have had to wait much longer than originally intended for this procedure, and I am pinning a lot of hope on it. I am praying that it works.

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Tuesday, August 8, 2006




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Monday, August 7, 2006

This morning, I gave Piper's daycare written notice that we will be withdrawing her from the program on August 18th. That day will also be my last day of work at the Muscular Dystrophy Association. I have decided to leave my job and become a full-time mother. I will be home with Piper for the next year or so, until she starts preschool.

Although I have been dying to spend more time with Piper ever since my 6-week maternity leave ended, this was a surprisingly difficult decision to make. Over the course of several weeks, T and I hashed and re-hashed the situation from all angles. I wanted to make sure that he was 100% OK with the idea of being the sole breadwinner for an extended period of time. Our money-management strategies needed to be re-evaluated. I also sought the advice of several of my "mom friends." During the past six months, I have become intimately acquainted with the struggles faced by working mothers, and I wanted to hear more about what life was really like "on the other side." I received the same advice from every person I consulted: DO IT!

Although I have known for quite some time that this is what I really want to do, it wasn't easy resigning from my job. I really like it. The pay is abysmal, and -- just as with any job -- I could produce a laundry list of complaints a mile long if asked for one. But I love my co-workers, we have a lot of laughs, and it feels good to know that I am helping sick people in need when I report to work every morning. If MDA has an opening when it comes time for Piper to go to school, I will definitely apply for it... and in the meantime, I intend to volunteer when I can.

I am beyond excited and can't wait to start this new phase of our lives! I am also a wee bit intimidated. Piper loves playing with the other kids at her daycare center. With each passing day, she is becoming more active, more curious, more daring. Will I be able to provide the kind of stimulus her little mind and body require? Once she starts crawling (any day now), will I have the stamina to keep up with her? I am trying not to worry too much about these things, because I know I will adapt... just as I have adapted to everything Piper-related thus far. Fun playmate, creative teacher, effective disciplinarian... mothers wear so many different hats, and striking a balance between these different roles can be extremely challenging. I guess I'll just need to take it day by day and see how it goes...

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