Wednesday, August 25, 2004
09:02 a.m.
Last 10 Songs Randomly Selected by iTunes:
De La Soul: Ring Ring Ring
XTC: Don't Lose Your Temper
Elliott Smith: Bled White
Tahiti 80: Antonelli
Crowded House: Don't Dream It's Over
Idlewild: Roseability
David Byrne: Walk On Water
Steel Pulse: Man No Sober
Sarah Harmer: Pendulums
Merrick: Salesman
Since I last wrote, I have had coffee twice. The first time was on Sunday. It was a particularly boring day at work, and I found myself wanting to snack... out of boredom, which is never good. So I walked to Starbucks and got a cup of coffee instead, all the while telling myself that I deserved a little something special for giving up my Sunday to work in a dull office, promising myself that I would only give in to my coffee cravings on Sundays from then on, etc. The rationalization patterns of a true addict. It tasted so good! And it got me really high, too. Further evidence of it's poisonous nature.
I succumbed to my coffee desires again yesterday afternoon... this time, for no good reason. I felt guilty on the walk over to Starbucks. I felt guilty while ordering. And I slinked back to the office quickly, doing my best to keep the piping hot cup of liquid crack rock concealed from view in an effort to preserve my reputation as a non-coffee drinker. I'm sure nobody noticed, but I felt like all eyes were on me the entire time I was drinking it.
And now here I am, less than 24 hours later, intensely craving another cup. Fuck! I am such a weakling.
My father, stepmother and 11-year-old sister Courtney are arriving this afternoon to spend the weekend with me and T. We'll be doing touristy things mostly, as Courtney has never been to Calfornia before. Should be interesting, to say the least. I'll return with more coffee-fueled reflections once they leave.
Sunday, August 22, 2004
02:06 p.m.
This weekend's highlights:
T and I got our marriage license on Friday. We had to drive to a sketchy area in East LA and wait around for an hour and half. Glad to have this chore behind us.
On Friday night, I saw Federico Fellini's 8 1/2 for the first time. Incredible!
Yesterday, I spent an exhausting 6 hours in Hollywood, shopping for wedding-related items. I found almost everything I was looking for, though, which is a big relief. Only 5.5 weeks left!
Our honeymoon trip to Kauai is booked. We'll be staying at the Sheraton Kauai Resort. Two blissful weeks with my man, away from Overture... I can't wait!
Friday, August 20, 2004
08:14 a.m.
Last 10 Songs Randomly Selected by iTunes:
Police: Does Everyone Stare?
Cibo Matto: Working For Vacation
Bob Marley: Could You Be Loved?
Astrud Gilberto: Agua de Beber
Britta Phillips: Your Baby
Ohio Players: Fire
King Crimson: The Court of the Crimson King
People Under The Stairs: Yield
Ken Stringfellow: Death of a City
Ween: Bananas and Blow
I am lying in bed, drinking chamomile tea and listening to music. It's nice to have a spare moment to myself, finally. The past several weeks have been a hectic blur. Make that a hectic, non-caffeinated blur. I'm still off the coffee, despite everything that's been going on! I'm pathetically proud of myself.
The day before yesterday, I took a cool Photoshop class. It was free (my company picked up the tab AND gave me a paid day off to attend... I'm still kind of in shock about that, actually) and very inspiring. Although any semi-intellectual activity falling outside the scope of my dull office job is inspiring to me these days. I'm frustrated: if I didn't have a wedding to coordinate right now, I'd be able to devote more time to Web design and Photoshop and other creative pursuits. I have to keep reminding myself that in 3 short months, I will have no job and an endless amount of free time to spend however I wish.
I feel guilty for bitching about the wedding stuff. But I can't lie: it's kicking my ass. So much work! I mistakenly assumed that it would be easy, since our event is to be casual and non-traditional. I am going to smack the next person who says "Don't forget to have fun, this is your wedding, not a funeral!" Or "Your wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime event (insert corny divorce joke here), so slow down and enjoy it!" If I had a million dollars and a wedding planner, it might be fun. The truth is, I am a tired, stressed-out ball of nerves. I can't wait until October 2nd arrives and I can finally relax and enjoy.
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
07:58 a.m.
Today is Day 11 of my no coffee/no sugar diet. The first 4-5 days were really rough, but I am over the hump now and am starting to feel REALLY GOOD... just like I knew I would. I feel calmer and happier than I did before, and I seem to have more and more energy with each passing day. I skated 9 miles last night after work. 9 MILES! It's been almost a year since I've had the stamina to skate that far.
Tuesday, August 10, 2004
12:46 p.m.
Four days ago, I eliminated coffee and refined sugar from my diet. I was hoping to be feeling better, not worse, by now. This is by far the most uncomfortable detox experience I have ever had... and actually, that reinforces my decision to do it in the first place. I just hope I regain my youthful energy soon, because I have so many things to get done!
Thursday, August 5, 2004
12:00 p.m.
We had a great time at the concert last night. McCoy Tyner (pianist for John Coltrane's quartet) and Ramsey Lewis were on the bill along with Brubeck. Good conversation, good wine, good music... it was just what I needed.
My quest for relaxation continues tonight. I am going to Burke Williams after work for some spa action... a seaweed bath and a deep-tissue massage. I can't wait. If that doesn't relax me, I'm beyond help.
Wednesday, August 4, 2004
01:29 p.m.
T and I are going to see Dave Brubeck tonight at the Hollywood Bowl. We are both longtime Brubeck fans and have been looking forward to this show for many moons.
I love concerts at the Bowl. We like to ride the shuttle bus from Pasadena so we don't have to deal with traffic or crowded parking lots, and we almost always bring a picnic dinner and bottle of wine with us. I've been really stressed out with wedding preparation stuff lately... a picnic and live jazz show with my man should help to chill me out.
Sunday, August 1, 2004
08:18 a.m.
This weekend has been full of highs and lows. High: seeing Antibalas at the El Rey on Thursday night with T and my new friend Coral. Low: dealing with a horrible, 15-hour hangover the next day (I am officially too old to party). High: getting a good price for the free CDs that come with my MOJO subscription at the Amoeba trade-in counter. Low: stopping by Jiffy-Lube for what I thought was going to be a simple, oil change, only to discover that my car needed 0+ of work. High: researching Hawaii honeymoon spots and daydreaming about a time when I will no longer have to drag my ass into the Overture office 5 mornings a week. Low: dragging my ass into the Overture office this morning.
