Hikari [Light] // Kawaii Vision

Way to start the friggin weekend. Yey. I turned on the AC because it was friggin 80 degrees inside. I actually got PERMISSION from my mom to turn it on. But, my dad comes out and yells at me. For turning it on. Because he thinks it's COLD inside. I swear, either he's SICK, or CRAZY. Or, maybe he just didn't want the AC on for...whatever. Anyway, yeah. My weekend starts like that. Getting yelled at as soon I see my dad's face. Woohoo.

I've got a car wash tomorrow. At this rate, I'm gonna totally mess something up. SOMETHING'S gonna happen. I honestly hope that if anything bad happens, it happens to me and not to anyone else. They at least deserve a good weekend. And, I also gotta go to a quinceañera. Not that it's a bad thing, but my dad wants to go JUST BECAUSE his stupid friend Richard's gonna be there. I don't think Richard's a bad PERSON...just a bad INFLUNCE. Ugh, sometimes I hate him. I shouldn't say that, but I do....

Mood: angry
Listening to: Jeffrey...on the phone

Shinigami said These Words on Friday, April 28, 2006 at 08:06 p.m.

Ohkay. Randomness.... Yeah. I'm going through a Disney phase right now. And Kingdom Hearts. Yeah. Like...I can't stop listening to Simple and Clean. And Disney songs. But no one cares. Ha! Lol. Super happy and hyper right now! I dunno why, either? It CAN'T be the soda. I had that like yesterday and it all wore off last night.

Yesterday was spring fling! It was super fun! Super super fun! I was supposed to sell water with the Class of 2009 Club, but it was ALWAYS full, which sucked. But, I got to work with FFA at the roping and hay toss booths. It was hilarious to watch the guys compete with each other, to see who could toss it the farthest. Those things were HEAVY, okay? Like seriously. I had a hard time picking it up when JJ was helping me! Heck no, I didn't try. I prolly wouldn't have gotten it over the wall.... Then, someone from the National Security came over and just gave me a shirt. It was weird. Because I didn't even know him. Or talk to him at all that day. And those shirts were supposed to be prizes for throwing a football through a hoop. And Mark didn't get one...heheh. Mark was such a sweetheart yesterday ^^ He got me soda! Lol. And then he asked me to walk around the school with him (after everyone had left). It was fun just walking and talking to him.

Okay, so after school, we worked on decorations for banquet. It was pretty fun. But then I was LITERALLY on the floor laughing because of JJ. He was tickling me xD Lol. So, what did people do? Luisa just stood there and laughed. Griselda stood there and laughed AND took pictures. Mark yelled at JJ. Lol. It was super super fun!

Well, anyway. I seriously gotta go and finish my homework. I gotta finish reading Act II of Romeo and Juliet[but it's only two more scenes, and that's like five pages] and then I gotta start reading Act III so I can get it done by Monday. I know, I've got all weekend, but honestly, I wanna have time this weekend. Like, I have to go to a quinceañera this weekend, even if it's only for a few hours. And then I wanna....

Okay. Way to ruin my mood. Seriously. HOW the hell does he manage to do that? With a few words. I never talk to him, and then when I do, we end up fighting. ALWAYS. Yes, I manage to keep my cool, but I totally blow up later. Blowing it up in his face would be STUPID and totally not worth it.

Okay. That's over. At least I can write and vent. Still a little sore, but that's no biggie...I'm calm now!

Anyway. More later! Ja ne!

Mood: NOT positive
Listening to: Hikari [Orchestra Instrumental] - Kingdom Hearts Soundtrack

Shinigami said These Words on Thursday, April 27, 2006 at 04:58 p.m.

Omg. I am super super happy. Yesterday was a totally miserable day, but I guess that for every miserable day, you have to have a super happy day, right? Yeh...

Well, I'm vice president for my FFA chapter for the 2006-2007 school year! The president is JJ, so I'm really happy about that, since he's practically my brother. I'm super happy! Woohoo! And we didn't even have to do a revote. JJ won by majority vote, and there were six people running for president. I won by majority vote, too, and there were also six people running. For secretary, we have to do a revote between Gaby and Alex. That's pretty tough...

Anyway, yeah. Tomorrow's late start AND spring fling, so I think it'll be fun. I mean, I'm just gonna be selling water, but that's alright! I volunteered to do that xD Lol.

Nothing else to say right now...if I lose the election for vice president of my class, that's okay! It won't really be a big deal, especially since I tried. So yeah. Ohkay, seriously, that's all...more later! Ja!

Mood: excited
Listening to: Goofy [on KH2]

Shinigami said These Words on Tuesday, April 25, 2006 at 08:40 p.m.

WooT! I got my braces off yesterday! Yey! Not many people noticed, though, but Mr. Rodriquez says it's a good thing...

Erm. Test tomorrow. For English. Presentation tomorrow. For Geography.

Can't think of anything else. Honestly. Things have been pretty boring.

Oh! I hung out with Hannah, Joh, and Jeb all weekend! That was super super fun. From Friday to Sunday. We had a blast. We played "Zombie" on the trampoline...but that totally burned my knees ^-^; And...we played Twister! I lost. Every time. And Yuuki won. Every time. But he had it easy. I was all...twisty. But it was super fun because there were five of us. Still. Yuuki got like.... Right hand Red. Left hand blue. Left hand Yellow. Right hand green. He didn't have to move very much....

Omg. I can't believe the year's almost over. And it sucks that Mr. Rodriquez won't be able to come to SLC this summer. Man! But that's okay. I just hope I get to go.... But. There's only a few weeks of school left. Not including Finals week, of course. My Freshman year's almost through...and it's kinda sad. I mean the summer's cool, especially since we'll have something to DO this year, ya know? But I'm gonna miss seeing all the teachers at the Freshman Academy. But...enjoy it while it lasts, right? Yes!

I saw Weston this weekend! At Diego's party! Which, by the way, was TONS of fun. We played the Silent game. And I crashed into Hunter xD And he was a dork and when we were supposed to switch seats, he didn't move, so I got stuck in the middle! Okay, yeah, that doesn't make sense unless you know the rules of the game, but I don't feel like explaining them.

Omg. I can't believe how happy I feel. It's weird. And it's not the braces. It's something else, but I don't know what. Seriously. I haven't used the word "Fwee!" since, what...seventh grade...? I haven't been sad for a while. Okay, that's not true. I think I'll ALWAYS be sad...but I'm looking at things differently. I dunno, it's weird. Yeah. But yeah! I feel like...Jenny...again! Which is a VERY good thing.

Ohkay. Super super sleepy. Seriously. So, more later, then! Ja ne!

Mood: sleepy
Listening to: Hikari [Kingdom Hearts Instrumental Version] - Kingdom Hearts Soundtrack

Shinigami said These Words on Tuesday, April 18, 2006 at 09:06 p.m.

So...yeah. Nothing new. Nothing interesting. We're starting Romeo and Juliet in my English class. I'm looking forward to it, but it's gonna kill me. We look so deep into everything...my brain is completely tired from looking for so much symbolism in Lord of the Flies.

Other than that...yeah. Nothing interesting. My laptop should be at my house sometime next week. Hopefully Monday. If I'm lucky. And I'f I'm lucky, something else will happen on Monday. So I'm really looking forward to this weekend...completely contrary to my previous journal entry xD

Aren't the new fan buttons so pretty? I think so. I'm gonna add more. I wish they'd put up Gundam Wing fanlistings. I doubt they will...GUndam Wing is so old...it was cancelled like...nine or ten years ago (1996-1997). But I love that series. So much. I've got every episaode...plus Endless Waltz xD. Lol. And three CDs...and a plushie...and a bunch of other little things...but only THREE mangas plus the Art of Gundam Wing book. How sad is that? I'm saving up for more xD And I wanted a wall scroll. I found a site. Online. But they were out of stock. And they aren't getting anymore. Grr. But I'm getting Yu Yu Hakusho wallscrolls! Woohoo! Anywayl. My point. The fan buttons look pretty xD

I feel like talking about Anime today. Seriously. Sometimes...I dunno, I'm weird. Some days I'll feel totally pessimistic, ya know? Like there's no hope for anything. But other days...like today...I'm happy and perky! Omg. Do you think I'm bipolar? No, right? Because bipolar people don't realize that they're bipolar, right?

Anyway! My Hello Kitty watch broke today >_< It was a CUTE watch! Yeah.

I'm so super happy! I'm done with my homework! I finished most of it in study hall becuase I had nothing to do and nothing to read. Heheh.

Oh! I am also SUPER disappointed! Kingdom Hearts II isn't what I thought it'd be. Okay, yeah, I LOVE it. It's super cool. But Kingdom Hearts was better. Plus, Yuuki's already done with Kingdom Hearts II. And it only took him like 30 hours. Kingdom Hearts took...what...anywhere from 40 to 60 hours, depending on whether you actually looked for all the treasures and won every cup at the Colliseum or went straight for the win? Yeah. I mean, okay, there's some new additions to Kingdom Hearts II that are SUPER cool. Like the new characters. And the Nobodies (which I thought was a totally cool concept!). You actually see King Mickey. In fact, if Sora lost all his HP for boss battles, you got to play Mickey until you could revive him. (That saved me more than once xD). Then there's the Drive gauge and the two Keyblades. BUT. If they made us wait THAT long. If they made us wait for almost ONE YEAR to release it, couldn't they have made it better? It was originally supposed to be released in May of 2005. Nope. Then in June. Nope. Then in November. Nope. Early December. No. Finally. April of 2006. They actually released it at the end of March. But I expected so much more from it. Especially if they made us wait for so long! Yes. It's a super cool, super fun game. And I am totally in love with it. If I have time, I'll play for as long as I can. I just expected a little more ^^ Oh! But the theme song, Sanctuary by Utada Hikaru, is amazing! I still prefer Simple and Clean, though. Heheh. It's the way I am. Yuuki likes Kingdom Hearts II better. I guess I've just always had a thing for the first of anything. The second just can't compare, and that's always what I've thought.

Hopefully...POTC won't be the same. Hopefully it'll compare to the first one. I guess that's all for today! Ja ne, minna!

Mood: peaceful
Listening to: Simple and Clean - Utada Hikaru

Shinigami said These Words on Monday, April 10, 2006 at 05:32 p.m.

I don't like weekends. Every time, I have to deal with the same crap. Yes. Okay. So does everyone else. I know. Give me a break, I'm tired of this.

Every weekned, it's the same thing. NOTHING ever changes. NOTHING. There's always something wrong. In fact, I don't even remember the last time I actually hade a fun or happy weekend. Weeknights are awful, too...but at least I have until 6:00 every weekday to...try...to be happy.

And next weekend...Easter weekend...it's gonna suck. Honestly. It's a four-day weekend...and...yeah. Actually, I don't know about Friday, but I know I'll hate Monday.

Not that any of this matters. I'm just rambling. I haven't talked to Jeff in a while. Haven't talked to Weston since...

Happy

Birthday,

Wes!

Since his birthday.

Err...I think this is a super cute layout. But I'm fixing all my broken "fan" buttons. But they took down all the Gundam Wing sites and the image server I was using DIED >_< I love the title of the layout. Hikari. Light...I hope I can find mine soon...or at least...remember what it was.

I'm changing. And not in a good way. I...absolutely HATE the way I've become. I'm rarely happy. Depression is a completely common emotion for me now. I don't feel self pity. I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me. I'm just a very melancholy person now. I wanna be...ME...again. This isn't me. I wanna be the annoyingly happy, always smiling, never lets anything get her down, Anime obsessed girl I used to be. Okay...yeah, I'm still Anime obsessed...but not like before. And that is DEFINITELY not me. When I'm not obsessing over Anime...something is very wrong. Not that it matters at this point.

I want it to be summer. But at the same time I don't. There's ONE person I can talk to at school. Without worrying about what he'll think. He's been through similar things I'm going through right now. He's just...always THERE. Even if he's in a hurry, he makes time to make sure I'm okay. Okay, I know I can call him, he's already told me...but I wouldn't wanna ruin his vacation ^_^

Anyway. Summer. I'll turn 15. And we're going to Disneyland. And we're doing things. MY way. MINE. Not Yuuki's. MINE. Everything's always about Yuuki. I love the kid, he's my brother. But sometimes...it just seems like he's at fault for every problem. If I get in trouble...it's becuase of him. If my parents are having problems...it's becuase of him. He's unaware of it. He's totally oblivious. But I wish my parents would just see that he's more grown up that they think he is. They've never treated me the way they treat their sweet adorable little Yuuki. But they have to realize that even though he's 12, he's very mature for his age. More mature than I am, probably. I want them to see that HE'S GROWN UP. And he can HANDLE what's going on. It's so unfair that my parents keep up their act just so he won't suffer. Who's suffering? My mom. Me. Maybe even my dad. And I'm sick of it.

I'm sick of everything.

Mood: ...seriously depressed...
Listening to: Wait and Bleed - Slipknot

Shinigami said These Words on Sunday, April 9, 2006 at 02:29 p.m.