Friday
Oh yeah!it's the last day of school!Half day for us!Bad news is only 3 people in my class got back thier report book,no that does not include me.So ,in a way it's sad cos that means my mom has to meet the principal or something lidat.Good news is my mom would never agree to such an agreement.I don't know why,today i saw Vanessa for so many times.Haiz,makes me so lovesick.Was even supposed to have a chinese lesson combined with her class but it never became reality.Anyway,everytime i see her i just feel glad.Because to me,she is pure and always so lovable.Just so pure like diamond,sparkling with her smile.Almost went into a repeat of Tuesday's fiasco.Luckily,me and her went different ways.

Saturday
Pretty much slacked at home intending to study but it never was realised.Didn't go for the Yf program either.Heard from Liangjie it's something like "Shi zhi Lu kou".regretted not going leh.How could they don't have the Wu Zong Xian like me?heehee.Well,It seems like Alywin also slack and failed to study too despite staying at home.hahahaha!

Today
Oh well,tried my best to be early for service but was still a few minutes late.It's because i need tot ake care of my lil Brother for a while since he's sick.I don't know why ,but i suddenly feel that our growing church is becoming more superficial.Just feeling so lost.Maybe God has the answer,which brings me to one thing,i must seek him more!Even the songs are so lame.Saw Tammy's nose kena punched due to a fued between a girl and her.As they were having soccer tournament at that time,you could say there were about 22 people fighting.Saw Cutegal also.Long time never see her.And i just saw her for a brief moment.But what the heck!i am supposed to slowly let her go.Worth mentioning is that she dressed sexily today.But not revealing lah.Her Denim skirts were short!hahah ,first time she lidat!Then went to try out Jedi knight II at Cyberamazon.Man!it's pure fun with all the blasters.And not forgetting the hero item,Lightsaber!Yes,there's lightsaber and u can invent ur own move as you move and swing the blade too!Okie enough for now.

May the Force be with you!

Scribble at 01:01 a.m.

No more secrets!
Thursday, May 23, 2002

Oh well,Just visited Kah kee's website.That idiot copy and pasted my journal into his website again.Darn!LOW KAH KEE,next time u copy and paste my journal,i'll make sure your website will be poasted in#cchs and #alex.We'll die together.I'm sure you know i'm know who is capable of what i said.
The Incident

On Tuesday,as me and my gang of about ten decided to go Parkway Parade and have lunch before returning to school,Vanessa suddenly pop out of nowhere and was on the same route as i.Well,to walk to the bus stop is a very long way as my school is situated in the midst of Bungalows and all that.So,there should have been no cause of alarm,however,some idiot spilled the beans(Yes,Kah kee i am talking about you,lamer!)resulting in my class' boys(almost all of them)know the identity of Defiler and that's Vanessa.My friends were real "buddies".They think Vanessa is stupid and decides to chant my name in unison.Any idiot would know something is fishy.I tried my best to remain cool and began to walk faster.Suddenly,i felt a disturbance in the Force and turn around.I saw Au-Yueng muttering something to Vanessa!She looked at me,i looked at her,both speechless.I lunged at Au-yueng.Too late!The damage is done.So now she knows,or i assume it to be.Reports weren't favourable.Kah kee said he walked up to her trying to say something but she quickly told him"Yah,yah.Reynard like me right?"Au-yueng still say he only ask her where she was going and if she remembered him.The giveaway was that he told her not to mention his name so loud or else i will get jealous.Damned!Actually i quite enjoyed it now.Well,seems like i am in dark times!

Scribble at 07:44 p.m.

Crappy mood.
Sunday, May 19, 2002

It's been quite some time since i have updated.I do not have any wish to talk about my day to day events.Just realised maybe my journal is for me to write out my feelings.
Sometimes i just felt so cheated by kahkee.He never updates his webby,nevermind about that,but he doesn't even want to tell me the truth and worst of all he copied my entry into his webby.Now i don't really like this but yet,i still treat him like a friend.Sometimes i just don't know why i am so soft hearted .Why can't i be like that ass longwen who never forgives people(A rare case if he did).
Well,my school results are not even satisfactory.What a lousy piece of fuck i did in my Mid-yr.Basically,i am improving in my already good subjects.But i am still failing in maths,a subject which i have put in 2 hours per day into it!I got a lousy 18 points over a grand total of 100.What a big fat loser i am!the other two subjects which i still fail has improved by one grade.Obviously the teacher doesn't notice that.Big fat idiots!
Oh well talking bout church.I must say cutegal is slowly but surely going out of my mind.I will forget her.As for joe that guy,hostilities ,i sense,has continued.Obviously he still is the sarcastic guy he is.Can't stand him.Believe me,i am trying real hard.Been missing service for two days.Missed Yf yesterday.What's gone into me??Where is that hard willed discipline that a German trooper should have?I consider myself and likened my discipline to that of a German SS minus the brutality although i can be capable of that.
Oh well,a couple of days ago,me and kah kee were having a conference call,but since it's just the two of us.I decided that we should call Vanessa.This he did.HE acted like Vanessa gave him a prank call while i just stay silent listening to her beautiful voice.ALthough she was not at fault ,she still spologises for the incident.Maybe her character is what i like best about her despite rumours she prefers gals.I'll wait.

Scribble at 10:07 p.m.

Security Breach!
Friday, May 10, 2002

Monday

Sat for E.Maths exam today.Not a very exciting day though.Peter went to buy the COssacks:The Art of War.Saw Vanessa.Au-yueng almost guessed who is Deflier(Vanessa).But Kahkee and my acting skills saved the day.

Tuesday
I went to buy Cossacks expansion with peter.HAHAHAH.I got it!My Chinese and Elective Geog. Paper ends!
Wednesday
Finished my Science(Chemistry) Exams.Brought my classmates to my home there the coffeeshop and eat.Au-Yueng found out about my webby here and know who is the Defiler(Vanessa) liao.Damned!But luckily he did not spill the beans.I am grateful for that.Security has been Breached!
Thursday
It was my day off from school as my class had no exam papers today.Slept late the night before and woke up at about 12 something.Met Alex and Jun HAo online.We decided to go and watch My Sassy Girl.Well,It was a very nice show and will remain so.Better than all the movies i have seen this year so far.The movie kept me and my friends laughing and touched our hearts in the end.It was a long show also.Okie,then we went McDonald's for breakfast and study a bit for tomorrow.In one of the conference calls tonight.Auyueng finally revealed to me an kahkee about his knowledge of Defiler.Security Breach alert!
Today
Finished my last major exam paper today!(History paper one) Came home and found my pimple in the eye since yesterday had burst and my bottom eyelid is filled with pus.Yucks!Slept a long nap.About 5 hours?Tomorrow marks the end of my exams.The Listening paper.Yipee!Kah kee made everybody's blood boil just now as he decides to mess up our downloads.Great now everybody is Dulan!I shall end here.Bye!

Scribble at 10:51 p.m.

Fruitless day.
Sunday, May 5, 2002

I guess i really need to discipline myself.I didn't go for service today because i was tired and distracted by my computer again.Guess i need to seek God more often.Missed cutegal already.....

However,it's not entirely fruitless.Because i met Simon online.But it's only a short while.And i manage to spend quality time talking with two of my sisters(church sisters lah!)Seems like one of them is troubled by relationships and another,CG.Haiz,how can i this acgl help them?First i think i need to really regconise to myself that sometimes i really need to change my bad habits.Oh well,it's gonna take a lot of discipline.

Had wanted to talk with Jun hao.But he never called back.Haiz.Waited for him until i sleep.Kah kee woke me up at 1 plus in the wee hours of this morning and ask me to conference with a gal and Au yueng.Rejected his offer anyway.Too tired.

Guess i'll just stop here.Oh yah,i received an animation from Daryn,it's cute and well,touches my heart abit.Thanks BRO!Guess i'll return to my Grandma's and have dinner and practice for my maths paper which is tomorrow.Plus,i think i'll be having a chat session with Zhaoqiang on the phone.It's been ages since i talked to him.Goodnight!

Scribble at 09:46 p.m.

Exams
Saturday, May 4, 2002

Thursday
Oh well,my papers start as of today.Wow,it's damn stressful but i do not seem affected....Maybe i am a simple happy boy.Hahahaha.It's my Social studies and Accounts paper today.Social studies was fine but accounts was well,...bad.Slack around after exams.

Friday
It's my Physics paper today!Only one paper.Some of my friends went to watch Spider Man.Kim Seng and i decided to go join Peter,Au-Yueng and kah kee for lunch.Wow,$3 for a big plate of mee siam.Well,ME and Peter then went to Harvey Norman to check out the new supplies of games.
I went to Peter's house to play Renegade,quite shiok.Better than what i expected.Kim seng and Jun Hao came later.We slack around until about 5 something when me and Kim seng decided to have an early dinner.His treat.It was more like a snack to me.Hee.

Today
Everything was not right.First,i have papers today and no one wake me up in the morning(i was staying at my own house).Worse still,my great grandma almost came to my house to wake me up as i forgot to put down the phone properly.Haiz.So i was late for the paper.Luckily,i finished it in time.However i have no confidence for this paper although it is english,one of my strong subjects.Then came the history paper II.Well,i think i answered all the questions correctly but frankly speaking,although i am Godly in history,i have no confidence this time.Haiz.Suayness.

Went to YF late again due to my slacking and resting.Just can't help it,i could have slept.If i was ill-disciplined,i would have slept and heck care YF.I didn't.Well,the programs was quite useful and fun.It's on forgiving .Anyway,Cg time was fun also and i think JEssie is starting to enjoy it.Oh yah,Cutegal looks good.Hahahaha.
Today,a rare thing happen,we didn't visit Cyber Amazon after dinner!Instead,the rest went home while Joe,Yilong and i sat down and talked.It was mainly Yilong trying to help Joe from his problems.Somemore that joker Jianming wants me to lend him my most interesting game.Oh well,i shall lend him considering that he is going to Chiangmai as a missionary for Six months soon.I'll miss him.Afterall,he's my second DGL.I love both DGLs.And Senglong is in the Navy now.ALways out at sea one.I didn't see zhaoqiang and Daniel either.Daniel got field camp while Zhao qiang is another weakling with a back problem.hahaha.
So till then my friends,bye.

Scribble at 11:33 p.m.

Fnally some rest.
Wednesday, May 1, 2002

Monday
Just another boring day at school.Nothing much.Tests.Homework.Boredom.Oh yah,i reformatted the computer

Tuesday
Well,Same stuff as Monday.Had remedial for Maths with Miss Ng though.After that,i went to SPC with Kimseng and ate.Talked about our class and classmates.And how could i forget the teachers?
My plan was ruined.I had reformatted my computer yesterday so as to enjoy tonight until the wee hours.But i ended sleeping in my Grandma's house instead at about 9plus and did not wake up until about the wee hours.What a wasted night.Damned!

Today
Well.Woke up for the Dip of Life 4.Woke up at 8.30am.Suppose to be in SPc by 9.30am.But well,due to unforseen circumstances,i reached there at about 10am.Heehee.Luckily i was not the only one late but nonetheless the bus was waiting for me.I had to wake Kevin and Simon up too by waking up thier sister,heehee.Well,Cutegal was very chio today.I like her sense of dressing.Quite cool.Well,i prefer to go for the slacker kinda look.heehee.Well,i saw some of my bros and sis get baptised.Today is William's and Jasmine's birthday.Then came the Bowling competition.Did quite well but i do not expect to win.There's always a higher mountain as they always say.Teamed up with cutegal.So i don't really expect to win.hahahah.Ooops!Then we all went Fareast for dinner.The food was bad.We went into a hotel for the toilet.hahahaha.Well,Simon and Kevin will be going back to Kl at about this time boarding the train.Goodbye Brothers!Oh well,had wanted to go for movies but that zhaoqiang pang seh me.HAiz.He's back for halfday while poor daniel has full camp in BMT.Hahahahaha.Joes still needs more time for me to be patient with him.Haiz.Well,as jianming says,"a friend in church is almost forever.An enemy in church is almost forever also."How true.Well,tomorrow is my accounts and social studies paper.Please pray for me!Thanks.

Scribble at 09:57 p.m.

Reformatting soon.
Sunday, April 28, 2002

Saturday
Oh well,i had my Paper One mid-year examinations this morning.The topics were damned hard.Especially the English Composition.I actually did not know what to choose or write.Wrote one eventually.But i do not know if i could pass it.My Mid-year papers will start next Thursday.Till then,those reading my journals please do keep me in your prayers.Went to SPC to eat with classmates and i brought them up to YF to see Cutegal.Heehee.Pity she was not there yet.Reached YF about half an hour late as i went home to bathe and did not stay in SPC.Cutegal was cold to me.But i guess it may be because of the exam fever.CG was quite fun.Jessie did not come because she is still uncomfortable with the cg.Looks like i need to talk to her.I this Acgl is not transparent one.SAw Daniel after YF.He came in his Army uniform.He looked like a smaller version of Jeremy.Oh well.Had an hour of Cs .It was the new 1.4 version.Joe keep suaning me but in the end,it is i who got the top fragger for the whole game.Then me and joe walked back to SPc for a short chatting session with daniel,Yilong,Cherrie,Angela and Jiamin.My com is still haywired.Oh yah,Things in dg got a bit heated up because of Joe and Jianming again.Personally,i think Joe is too smart for his own good,in some instances blinding him.Don't know what to do with him lah.
Signing off here but no signature will be required.Hahahahah

Scribble at 12:24 a.m.

The fever rages
Saturday, April 27, 2002

Oh well,i am talking about the exam fever.Ah beng has a brand new webby.The address is http://ahbeng.pitas.com.HAiz.Today i stayed in school until 5 to wait for friends.Did some owing assignments along the way anyway.Teacher thinks that i am gay because i am waiting for my friends....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.Makes me wanna laugh.Passed my History test so i needn't stay back in class after school.I stayed back at the Fish tank anymore because of Maths assignments.The friends that i waited for were caught because they were playing ball in class.If not,they could have been gone at 4pm.What a waste of time.
Well,There's the start of my exams on Saturday.It's my composition paper I.Do pray for me alright?Wake me up at 6am those of you reading this.Heehee.Oh yah.I talked with Ah Daye until the wee hours of Friday also.Talked about a lot of things.
I am So stressed and bored and yet happy.I must be inhuman...

Scribble at 12:22 a.m.

Updates.
Saturday, April 27, 2002

Oh well,basically for the first four days of the week i have been slacking in class cos my maths and english teacher are on course.Noticed that cutegal weren't around on Sports club.And did i mentioned that i topped the level with a score of 14.5/15 for my chinese oral exams for midyear?heehee.I missed a lot of people this few days.Daryn,Daniel,zhaoqiang and cutegal.Haiz.Life and Love,just don't understand what drives me.

Scribble at 12:16 a.m.

Haywired.
Sunday, April 21, 2002

Well,My computer has got a virus or so i think.Damned!IT's was still okay yesterday.Wonder what my cousin did to the computer.HAiz.Everything is wrong.Well,i did not go to service today.Was very tired and still felt a lil sick.Can't open my right eye too.Had touse my hand to force them open as the pus welled up my eye overnight and dried.

Woke up at about 11plus i think.Missed having fellowship with the Yf.Especially missed cutegal.HAiz.Wonder how she is.Well,even as i am typing this,my com is still haywire.Maybe i should as William to help me out.Not very nice but well i need you William!!!!!!Actually wanted to meet the guys but since they were so aimless,i stayed at home and slack.My computer to not help very much as u can see..Well,guess i'll just stop here and head to my Grandma's house for food and do my homework.I am Just so dead.

Scribble at 09:23 p.m.

A summary
Sunday, April 21, 2002

Wednesday
Well,Did the Napfaa five items.Improved a bit on my shuttle run.Just 0.1 sec to passing it.Went to Sports club although i was really tired.Ended up doing my comphrehension there with ben.Played a bit of basketball later.I was one of the top scorers!:)

Thursday
Just another boring day rushing through homeworks and tests.

Friday
Things got a little warm in class.I was sent out because i forgot to do a homework for that bitchy English old hag of a teacher(She's pseudo-English).Well,as i was standing outside the class with Kah Kee,his paper flew to the ground floor,i laughed.My Discipline Master saw us looking down and he shot and asked questions later.We did twenty push ups and sit ups.Along the way,that bitch kept saying how bad i was.Idiot,as if i never pass up your homework before like that.I will not resort to vulgarities here but then again i am let down by someone who claims to have experiences with God.Wonder where she learnt how to backstab people like that.The Discipline master took the opportunity to bootlick her as well.Which in my opinion,was not a good teacher at all.She said i will be doing manuel work in the future.I am just waiting for the day when i become the chairman of the school committee.We'll see about that.But then again,she'll be dead much to no one's misery.
Saturday
Well,no YF as it is study week.Did not study anyway.I went to play Cs with Joe,Jan,Liangjie and the two Botaks who just came back from the army(Daniel&Zhaoqiang)Hsien Long joined us later although i do not know who told him we were there.After dinner,i met my cousin and a former schoolmate who is now his schoolmate.Talked a while before i went my way with Jan and Joe for Diablo 2 in Parklane.They did not have the computers.By the time we found places,we were playing Unreal Tournament and Dod.I walked up the Lan shop in the midst of UT and vomited outside a Pool centre.OOOPS!i quickly went back to the lan shop and acted as if nothing had happened.After the game i vomitted again in the toilet and went home with Joe.Waited for my cousin to come for me as i told him about me.Looks like my family are all loyal people.Joe stopped at Raffles place to go to Jiamin's house.Jiamin called me as i was on the Mrt with My cousin,Kenneth.Asked where Joe was,told him where he is and presumably,they met and went to her house along with Yilong and Cherrie i think.Oh yah,i had a Lymph or pus bag in my right eye.It burst as i vomitted i think,cause my eye bled during the wait for Kenneth.When i got home the pus came out.Kenneth stayed at my house too.What a boring and yet eventful day.

Scribble at 08:41 p.m.

http://kaiser.pitas.com
Tuesday, April 16, 2002

Monday
Well,gone through the normal rituals of getting punished and scolded and doing the neverending homework.Then got Accounts remedial.After it got the 2.4km run for NApfaa.I was the last class.Well,i saw Vanessa Tang in her Pe gear.Although she looks more like a handsome girl than i chiobu,i am still attracted to her.MAybe i like this kinda girls.HEehee.For a splitting moment i saw her ran,i feel so satisfied looking at her.Haiz....Finally the moment came for me to run!I jogged with a good friend peter at normal pace.Then about 3/4 into the run,i stopped!!!!!Oh no!Everypart of me is aching.When there was about 2-3 hundred metres from the finishing line,i begin to jog in a fast pace.Then i saw teo female classmates ahead of me,as i neared them ,they looked at me murmered something then ran off!Feeling very Dulan,i sprinted using every ounce of my strength,i had prayed to GOd to give me and Peter strength.Looks like he answered my prayers because this last act of defiance from me amazed myself and my classmates and i overtook the two bitches!YEAH!I had just realised the joy of overtaking someone you would love to hate.However,it came with a price,i was so exhausted after the sprint that i eventually fall to the ground thinking i would die with the breathing problems that is arising.Thank God i can be here to type this entry.Want to know the result?I failed with a improved timing of 1 second.

Today
Did not go to school today as planned with my friend over the phone.We had conference calls until the wee hours of the morning.Fun.Talked until my cordless phone no battery.HAHAHAHA.Woke at about 9 plus.Then do homework before going to the doctor.Don't think i can finish my homework anyway.HAiz.Later going back to my Grandma's home to do whatever homework i can finish.So i should have around 3/4 of my homework finished by today.Wish me luck and Pray for me!Thanks!

Scribble at 08:40 p.m.

http://kaiser.pitas.com
Tuesday, April 16, 2002

Well,it's been 9 days since i updated.Was very tired even though i had the time.Well,i'm always tired due to lack of sleep.Will just try to recount what happened this few weeks.I will be making two separate entries.

Monday
Just doing the things the normal kids are doing.
Tuesday
Same as above.Teachers are all barking either at me or my class..
wednesday
Same as above.Sports club is not the same anymore without Daniel and Zhaoqiang.Just feel so lonely.Even seeing cutegal does not help.No more suans and intense basketball games with the two joker.Just hope that they will be back from NS soon.
Thursday
Boring day at school.My class has been receiving alot of pressure.So i am quite agitated this few days.
Friday
Well nothing much either.I am currently working very hard now...Because i have to do 2 hours of maths everyday.Plus remedials on Mondays,Tuesdays and fridays.Found out that i enjoy it a bit.Maybe behind my lazy side....i am a workaholic afterall.Called Weichun and others to see movie.Well they either watched it or no time.Damned!
Saturday
Woke up at 1 something.I had resolved to come YF punctually but then again,i am a boy with negligible discipline.So guys,please be patient with me.When i reached YF at 4pm,the other were already finishing watching a movie about Jesus.I almost cried when i saw how Jesus died.Figured it must have been worst.By the way,did i tell you that my cg has a new member???Thank GOd,we have a new brother GAN!He's a Thai.After dinner,we went to funfair and i found it boring so Sachin,dongli,louis,chinhao,joe and me went to play CS.I really suck at it now.Haiz!Did i tell you i made sharon angry today?Well,as we were taking the lift to dinner,the door wouldn't close,so cheeky old me asked sharon to go out and the lift door closed!i opened it in time to ask Sharon in,But i think i hurt her feelings....I SMSed her in the night later to apologise.No answer.
Sunday
Originally woke up at 8am to prepare for Service.But i slept but luckily i had foresight.I Smsed my bros and sisters to wake me up.So they called one by one.However,i fell asleep and woke up at about 9am instead.Rushed through my morning rituals and Thank God my Father gave me a ride there.Cutegal didn't even say hi to me.I think she knows something or just feeling tired or even angry at me for what happened yesterday.HAiz.Went to Sibs and found out Sharon started a sibs class also.I looked at the way they study and laughed teasing them along the way.They started out with about 6,but ended with 3....hahahahahah.We made the decision to switch from the book of Ephesus to Matthew to learn the basics first.We then went to meet up with the guys at Grandlink for CS then we all play Diablo 2.Never in my dreams would i know that the game i told my friends i would not play would actually be the game i am playing together with the guys.Well,these are the ironies of gameplay.heehee.Was surprised to see cutegal there.Jan,Suresh and i then went to eat duck rice.It was threatening to rain when i went home.Thank God for my dry journey to Paya Lebar MRT.But i got drench as i decided to walk home despite the already falling rain.HAiz,the ironies of life.Realised Cutegal is becoming cold towards me again.

Scribble at 08:11 p.m.

April Fooled
Sunday, April 7, 2002

Saturday
Well,no school for me so i slept until 12 plus.Slack around a lil and then go over to my Grandma's for lunch.I naturally was late for YF lah!Got a scolding from Jianming and a suan from Sharon.Haiz.Really must try to be punctual next time.Cg has improved.Now jokes are allowed but Joe is still quite stiff.Dg class was fiery.Things got hot when Joe said he didn't felt like going Dg.Something happened between him and jianming on Friday night so Joe still bore a Grudge against jianming.Jianming told Joe to leave the class.Not that Jianming is very harsh to him but then again i hope Joe know that it is for his own good.He may not know how it will benefit him but i think in years to come he will.Guess it'll be some time before the matter blow off.Played Dod after dinner.When the others went home.I went back to SPC to see if there were still worship practice anot.There wasn't but Sahron,Weichun,Louis,SUAN and Laiyien was there doing some decor thingy.Went home slack a lil before going to sleep at 2 something in the morning.

Today
I woke up at 8am today!Thank you God for answering my prayers and also the brothers and sisters who called to wake me up.But i was late for bout 10minutes i think.Took a Taxi and met Chin Teck and Jiaying taking Taxi also.I teased them about punctuality and they rebuked me with my Yf punctuality.What to do....I kept quiet lah!Weichun did not come as he was sick and the Saxophone that was on the stage looked like a tribute to him just like the American flag of the 911 incident...hahaha..Well,after service had wanted to go visit weichun with Sahron and Louis.(i skipped Grandlink because of this.)However,they decided to go somewhere else first and as i wasn't interested .i Went grandlink and played DOD.As usual i was always outnumbered as Joe always wants to be in the same team as Yilong.(odd numbered players what.)But i did not give Joe the easy victory he had hoped for.They had to fight for every inch....HAHAHAHAH.ALthough i did not win,i am contented to show them how i fight and die like a true AXIS soldier!I called weichun to see if he had woke up after the game and asked him if we could come visit him.It was positive.I took on a train to Orachard to meet Sharon and gang at Far East.Just as my train reached Lavendar,Sharon called to say that weichun wants to rest so i came home at about 6 something.Felt like a fool so that's why my pagename is called April Fooled.Then consulted Tammy on school stuff.Played Close combat 3(now my current time waster).Actually,the reasn why i wanted to go visit Weichun was simple.One,Weichun is my brother.How could i not care?Two,because of some one.(Broad hint:Cutegal)Anyway i am going to have a short doze before going back to grandma's.Homework and tests are waiting for me in the weeks ahead.

PS:Cutegal looks charming and beautiful and graceful....(forget about graceful)
Suddenly i miss Zhaoqiang and Daniel.No more nightly talks.Haiz.And when weichun goes into the army,no more SC ally liao.Sad!

Scribble at 08:22 p.m.

Loss of Good Friends
Friday, April 5, 2002

Well.Many things have happens this week so i shall summarise them .

Monday
Nothing much except i think i used up five hours to finish a maths assignment.On Sunday,my good bros promised to go watch Resident Evil but in the end.....well,it doesn't even matter.HAiz.Played DOD instead.
Tuesday
Another boring day.Was supposed to go out and catch Resident Evil with zhaoqiang and daniel and company but then just as i had stepped out of the house they called to say they were not interested anymore...And excuse me...FUCKERS!!!!!!
Wednesday
Went to sports club.Zhaoqiang left for NS already.Daniel will be going in the next day.Played a last basketball match with him and had a last supper with him.Sharon appears to be nutty today as she ordered a lot of food.(we shared of course)But considering that she don't eat much,the amount she ordered would have killed her.Then she was really siao and kept laughing and take joy in Suaning me.Haiz.
Thursday
Daniel went for NS liao.Came back home to find a farewell letter from zhaoqiang and Daniel.Quite touching except for daniel where he specified me out for something(Hint:something not very good).Didn't manage to do my homework as i slept through the night like a baby.(An overgrown one).
Today
Today i am very stressed up.First,Got chinese test,then maths quiz(Thank God Teacher never come today),and to top it off,a three hour history paper after school(that was postponed as well due to chinese teacher taking eleven of us,including me,for chinese remedial)Good thing to know is that the English bitch teacher did not come.Yeah!After remedial at around 4pm.Chinese teacher asked me to give him the file by today(i owed him for some day liao.)so i spect two hours slaving away preparing the file and things that were supposed to be inside but i didn't do.By the time i was home,i am almost ready to hit the sack as it was going to be 7pm already!Tired!But since i am here typing all these,you can be assured that i am still awake.Heehee.Sleeping soon.Don't bother to wake me up.

Scribble at 11:43 p.m.

Mixed feelings
Sunday, March 31, 2002

Well,since there is an inclusion of a her(not my crush but the one i have been talking about these days)My crush shall be renamed from Her to cutegal.hahahahaha.
Yesterday

Well,i was late for Paradise Cool yesterday because i was slacking and almost fell asleep.Saw some Chio Bus there and was kinda hoping one of them would stay in YF.Wishful thinking.Well,i was quite surprised there was according to Tricia,18 new friends.Well,God moves the impossible.Couldn't believe Sharon's sister Serene got attached.Well,no need to be jealous .I shall find one in the near future although now i am after cutegal.Doesn't mean i don't like cutegal anymore but just saying that she will be my gal next time....hahahahahahaha.Nonsense.Another thing,i lost every starcraft match i played.....what a letdown.I wasn't really interested in starcraft as i was bent on playing Day of Defeat.Day of defeat was nice and i was quite good.Proved myself to be a true Axis soldier by being ruthless and fierce...haha.i came home feeling tired and i retired earlier than expected.One thing to note was that cutegal looks very good (well,i say that everytime...).Anyway my matter with Her is not really settled yet and i still don't feel or even think i am in the wrong.Well,different people have different values.I shall rest my case and will not raise this up again unless needed.

Today

Well,Today i was late for church as i slacked and went to have breakfast at my Grandma's together with my family.Had a stomachache later and i had to use the toilet in SPC.Haiz.Well,today marks the end of the Joy Of Life series and i don't know if it's a harvest or not.Maybe Tiak will announce it next week.It turns out benedict knows what happened between me and her.I found out while slacking in front of the computer this morning as i was reading his journal.Well,during the service i slack even more with louis at the back of the seats.
Later on after service,i wanted to watch resident evil and i managed to get 8 blokes(and gals:))to join me.I left Sharon to do all the planning even though she didn't want to go with us(OR is she scared???)Ended up playing Cs and DOD instead as people all begin to sian 1/2.Had an enjoyable time as a lot of guys were there.Dod was challenging as there was counter-offensive and offensive going on at every corner.One word-Shiok!Well,went to see the guys play pool later only two girls were there(Tammy and jiamin)Saw them home with Benedict and Joe later.The three of us then went KFC for food.Talked about a lot of things.It rained when we wanted to go home and Joe decided to make a dash for it home.Ben and i stayed behind at KFC after loitering around a lil and chatted.Went home and begins to watch Prince Of Egypt later.The show was damn edifying and power.Shows just how faithful God is and how God will punish those who stand in our way.Amen!Well,my mom is nagging at me to return to my Grandma's house now.So bye!!Wow i am soooo tired.

Scribble at 10:12 p.m.

Bang!
Saturday, March 30, 2002

Which Firearm are you? brought to you byStan Ryker

Scribble at 12:29 a.m.

A war of words?
Friday, March 29, 2002

Well,My school sports day was fun.My friend and i practically walked down to the track in all our honour and no one stopped us.Pity our friends on the seats under the sun while we were under the shade.We were looking for chio bus.Wow,Dunman high got a lot of pretty lasses.hahahaha.Anyway we were bored and we played tricks on person we do not know by asking them questions like"Hey do you still remember me?"hahaha.It's fun to see thier reaction.
Well back to the topic which is stated as my pagename.It seems that the person who i had revealed something to Daniel(it concerned him what)is feeling very sore.Well then,it's surprising that she knew part of my conversation with Daniel.Well,She posted them on her journal.Oh well,it's her right.I've been prepared for this kinda things all along.No hard feelings.Thought of people thinking that i am childish,was laughing at them thinking about the "matured" things they do.Like trying to "suan" me until i apologise to someone.Thought this guy knew me,but apparently,it was not deep enough.Well,Sometimes it's hard to tell when a person's personal privacy is infringed.Just take the case of an online journal,Everyone can have access to it if it's online so then,it can be said that the writer knows the possibility and therefore if some secret is leaked,that's just too bad.Anyway,people still think i am wrong for leaking out her secret to Daniel,but i don't think so.The journal was there and it has her photos,if it was so private are the photos there for her own pleasure and why even include a "guestbook" link?Funny.Besides people think i shouldn't have just told Daniel without considering her feelings,but i beg to differ.I simply told Daniel because it concerns him and i admit,it's kinda tempting but that's just me.I ain't being selfish just to satisfy my pleasure but i do take my brother's stuff seriously.If that is bad,tell me and chances are i will beg to differ.
Meanwhile i will not apologise and she can ignore me anyway,i can't possibly die without her.Afterall,i never enjoyed a close friendship with her and as things are going to turn out,it never will.Since grapes untasted will always be untasted,i have no regrets no matter how great rumours are about the grape being sweet.Cheers!

Scribble at 12:32 a.m.

God's answer?
Thursday, March 28, 2002

Oh well,Today at sports club.Yilong told a Yfer i snooped in on her webby and told things that were private to Daniel(it involved him as well.)Of course a normal person's reaction would be to kill him or her.SHe surprisingly kept her cool.Okay,not that i am a cold blooded animal or i am just an insensitive or immature kid as she puts it in her journal,i just kept my perspectives open.Yeah,perspective.Well,one guy may say i am wrong or one may say i am right.It's perspective.And well,maybe an online journal is a privacy.Well,why don't she wrote it in the diary?I for one think i am not wrong,Even if the whole YF condemn me,so be it......About the thing that i am not remorseful,How can i be when i think i am not in the wrong?I cannot help you if you decide to view things on another perspective.Well,she mentioned that she was gonna tell Daniel the thing only that i came in and spoiled everything.Well,I am sure she may have prayed to God first judging her character .So,Why can't she accept that maybe God chose me to let the cat out the bag?Perspective again.IT may sound lame but hey,God may answer prayers but not in the way you want them to be.I know a lot of the leaders don't really look up to me but then again,I am proud to say i don't blindly submit to leadership.It's just another eventful day.Perspective huh?

Scribble at 02:37 a.m.

Classified?(Con'T)
Monday, March 25, 2002

Today
I shared with Daniel on something i discovered when i was surfing the net for journals of Yfers.It's classified.Only discovered it yesterday.Prove to be very juicy but i shall not disclose anything.School towards the end today was sad.The Form Teacher was trying to spite us so we can perform in O's.So i am prepared to concentrate on Science and Maths at the same time devote only some time to Accounts.I am determined to go to Junior College,no exam or British examiner is gonna stand my way!Muahahaha!Well,there really is nothing much to write and since i have homework....BYE!

Scribble at 10:13 p.m.

Classified?
Monday, March 25, 2002

Friday
Practically nothing happens.Except that one of my mates at school willingly waited for me after my persuading(forceful one)

Saturday
Woke up at about 7:30am to go to school.Chinese remedials are driving me crazy.MAkes me very drained out for YF.And i don't have enough sleep on weekdays because i can't.I am addicted to the computer and i do my homework at night.Pity those adults at YF thinks a different way.Brought my friend to explore YF at about 1:30pm because we were having lunch there after school.We went home after that.He promised me he would be at SPC.Well,appeared that he was the motivation for me going to YF.He was playing card games in the new shop opposite Long John silver's.Saw him played for a while,saw three of my classmates and one of my classmates got a shock to see me as he was walking out the door.I think it was acted surprise.nevertheless,i reciprocated it back to him.haha.Tried to invite them to Yf but then they had plans.Well,another day perhaps.YF was practically preparing the Yfers for Paradise Cool.And during CG time,the adults in my Cg never fails to antagonise me.As i was cracking a joke that would be okay to Jianming,It apparently did not sound good with chin Teck and Jessy.It went like this,Suresh asked me to share something cool about the person who i had drawn by lot.It turns out to be him,I really had no clue as to what was so cool with him.So,i decided to crack a joke,i faked headache and said oh no this is very hard and to furthermore add to the effects,i blurted out one thing and exclaimed "oh Lord please forgive me for i have told a lie."Note that this would have caused laughters for about a few minutes in my old cg.However my new cg were different.Chin Teck asked me to be edifying.I just shut my mouth and kept quiet.One of this bloody days i am gonna settle this with the adults,it's high time they behave like youths or i won't show them any respect.I suddenly missed Senglong.With him everything was so fun and any joke was welcome.The same goes for Jianming.i THOUGHT Teck was gonna be like them but how wrong i was.Such a letdown.I am gonna have a talk with chinteck which i think will not be fruitful as he thinks he is not in the wrong and i think i am not in the wrong.I conclude that my chance of leaving Cg will be better.We shall see.Shared my woes with Jianming over icq that night too.Shared about my cg and Joe.HAiz.Problems.

Sunday
Well,it's the start of JOY OF LIFE!it's an evengelistic program and seeker service hosted by my church.Some of the Youths even join one of the dancing performance.I was dragged into the water by Louis into the stage crew.However,i was glad to have helped .We had stayed back on Saturday night to prepare for everything.I stayed back too but i just lazed around pretending i was a rapper since i got a beanie on my head.hahaha.Well,thanks to God and the efforts of many,it was a great success.The next one will be on Good Friday and sunday.No Sibs .Weichun had important stuff.Starcraft today was most boring .We won all matches(Weichun,Jeremy,Liangjie,me)against Joe,William jan and Dongli.One match lasted only half an hour.Day of defeat proved to be more fun when i played it with liangjie,joe and weichun,had a fun time shooting each other on CS also.In conclusion,the day was fun in the morning but became boring as the day draws to a close.

Scribble at 09:43 p.m.

Happy Birthday!
Thursday, March 21, 2002

YEsterday was just another lousy day.First had to go for chemistry test after school and i didn't know how to answer the questions.Then stayed back to do some maths practical which i didn't do at first.Used up two hours.So by the time i managed to be able to walk out of the school,it's 5pm.Took a taxi home as i didn't want to be late for sports club.An highlight of the day was that a good friend of mine,Mr Low Kah Kee,gave me the best present of my life.What he did was to run with me during Pe when we were running the 2.4km.He could have left me behind.But he chose to stay with me and encourage me with words like,"hey keep up the pace","Look we are finishing!".That really warmed my heart .As a result,I ran the whole of 2.4km without stopping at all for the first time.He later jokingly told me that would be his birthday present to me.I honestly said that was the best present i ever received.Wondered if he was touched..
Went to sports club.HAd a very good basketball game .Neil came back.Later on,as we were at Newton eating,Tricia pissed me off.She said things not very nice about my attitude towards daniel.Well,she doesn't even understand that we are like that.Fine.i'll leave it at that.
Today
Well what can i say?It's my birthday!But then again,it 's a boring one.No one celebrated with me.Not even a birthday song.Sianz!Then again,my trustworthy bros and sis Smsed me birthday wishes.Kah kee did that too!Didn't expect him to be such a good friend.Hahahah.One higlight of today is that Vanessa Tang(My first crush)came online just now.Talking with her at the moment.She matured a lot since i last spoke to her.Should have been talking to her these two years but i quarreled with her over the SQ 66 crash and so stopped talking.Now talk with her very awkward but good thing is she's friendly and frank.That's what i like about her.Of course the looks are thrown in too.Regretted quarreling over that small matter(well to quarrel over it is small).Perhaps God made her come online to talk to me for a lil while as a birthday present?If it is,THANKS DAD!hahaha

Scribble at 10:02 p.m.

Evil.
Monday, March 18, 2002

Scribble at 11:02 p.m.

Boring sunday.
Sunday, March 17, 2002

At 1 something am toda,i had SMSed alot of my church Brothers and sisters to wake me up at 8am.I was first woke up by my alarm clock.But i went back to slumberland anyway.At exactly 8am,Sharon called me to wake me up,Followed by daniel,liangjie and finally an Sms by Jessie.My Dad also woke me up.Reached church quite early.Service was good.Long time since i had worship in church.First time She offered her seats to me.Well,look like things just can't get any better.But i will not abuse her trust in me by going after her again...(At least not for some time.hahaha)Tiak sortz forced the Youths to go to the front to be administered to .I was prayed for by Michael.As we went for lunch,i kept singing "make a Fish" to the tune of "make a wish" to irritate Cherrie.And irritate i did.Or better than that.Went on to make fun of Sharon by calling her Crayon Xiao Xuan or La bi xiao xuan.hahaha.That did the job alright.Lunch at Long John Silver.Kept singing "Make a Fish" to irritate Cherrie.Well after lunch we socialise a bit and then proceeded to have Self initiated bible study with weichun and jan(it was Joe but he opt out and jan volunteered.)We started it a few weeks ago with Joe weichun and me.Quite fun.Proceeded to play starcraft later.Well it was a three v two with joe ,jan and me versus William and Weichun.Quite balanced considering jan is a liability.hahaha.Jan is okay lah.Well we won the first round because i introduced a strategy called stimultaneous Attacks.That is after we cleared a base we go on to another regardless of casualties.IT needed a lot of egging by me to make Jan do it.We won of course.Joe did little except to provide carriers in the later part of the game.Another battle was fought.This battle lasted about two hour cos were just so good.Team setting was the same.At first we were winning.But thanks to Joe who insisted on a suicidal frontal attack,i was the first to die.Not after i did substantial damage.I rebuild my base about 4 times all at different areas.But i eventually lost because i was the target as Weichun thinks 1 am a serious threat to him.After i die,the rest of my team switched to defensive.I had asked them to attack from the flank earlier on but they declined and william built up a powerful fleet that was well....invincible.Had we attacked from the flank,William is a dead Protoss.Well,the reason why i was taken out first was because i was too good as i have said.Weichun himself said so.Well,as they didn't listen to my advice to attack the flank which was proved to be correct,Joe and JAn lost.That's because they didn't listen to the master strategist.And they all seek to blame me.Well,Only losers blame people.I lost and i shall keep quiet.At least i fought to the end.Guess i'll end here.Tomorrow school reopens liao.BYE!

Scribble at 10:53 p.m.

CG?Burden!
Sunday, March 17, 2002

These few days of the holidays were spent going to school for remedials.Resulting in a sleepy me.Stinking school,Perverted principal has made it possible for me to attend the remedials.No thanks to them!Bored to death.The weekdays were just waking up early,going to school,back home and sleep.No time for myself.
Saturday
On friday i ask a lot of people to wake me up at 10:30am.Wanted to go for Acgl training.I overlook the time so i didn't go in the end.In the end,only a few person called me.Nevermind.I woke up at 9 something anyway.Woke up after a dream about a starcraft carrier destroy an enemy base.Sure enough,i cleared jan,will and dongli's bases with carriers with the help of some scouts and recall tonight.And also not forgetting the Hydralisk rush by Louis and Goliath cum siege tank rush by Wei chun.Killer combo.We were basically the guys left at SPC anyway.The others went to enjoy Kenny Rogers and Swensen's i think.I got conned.Bought a plate of Hokkein Mee from the Foodcourt and it was inedible.Only had one mouth of it,Rare right?Haiz.
During Cg time,i am begining to feel uncomfortable and sick of it.Tried to bring myself to accept them as it is.However,Having adults like Jessy,Shirley and Chin Teck would mean what we youths consider jokes are crude to them.I can't even say bullshit.Well i guess senglong and i were right,They are ANTIQUES!Thought chin Teck would be better,how wrong i am......I miss my old Cg with Yenting,jiaying and jianming they all.Somemore got Daryn,jan and i the three jokers.Cg time then was laughters,now is just some sharing like news reading.Even the most interesting stuff turn tasteless with them.In the past,Just talking is very fun already,don't even need activities.Everything is so spontaneous.Now,i have to see to the rules and learn not to say bullshit.This is Bullshit!I never like rules and i will never like them!CG now is boring ,just like listening to economic news.I have a feeling i won't stay as Acgl long and also won't be in this CG long.Well,God is in control.And i will trust him to pave the way for me.Time to go sleep if not will be late for service!

Scribble at 12:34 a.m.

Jialat lah!
Thursday, March 7, 2002

Hi people,it's me again.Past few weeks i have been happy until today.Firstly,SHE is talking and being friends with me again.I do appreciate that.But it will be a long time before i am going to feel love to her again.Haiz.But that is an improvement on her attitude.Keep it up!Oh did i mention that i got the top score for English common test in my class?And while i am celebrating over this,please do not remind me of my Maths,Accounting and science results because they purely suck!I also noticed something,nobody has been updating thier journals ever since i stopped for a while....Am i the trendsetter?I think that's what you get when you are good at writing.hahaha.Yesterday was real SIAN and tired after sports club.One reason is because i was exhausted and another is because i miss Her.Haiz.

Today
Today went to school feeling happy.Came back like a person who has been through much and it's true!
It's like this.......5 guys and me were caught playing card games and somehow the teachers and discipline master knows that money is involve.At most i would get a caning.However,8 of the boys from my class were caught placing soccer bets with a bookie.It 's a police case but it's not confirmed yet.There's a spy in our midst.Not just our class,at least two classes were raided also.The feeling just suck!The disicipline master even ask my friend if he knew who was the spy.If it was me,i would tell him"No i don't know.Why don't you tell me?"Come on lah if we know who was it that guy in hospital liao.Somemore he ask me whther i know how to bet on soccer anot.I don't even watch the game let alone bet on the game.I told him i don't know he say i not cooperative.Come bite me lah DOG!I just insist i didn't know and he kept quiet.hahaha Fuck off!And the card game was stopped among us when teacher warned us about getting caught about 1-2 weeks ago.That shows we are changing but the school is digging up the past.Why not dig up my parent's past mistake also shitty school??Don't ever come to this school people.it may be famous but it's full of crap.What matters is whether you got the brains anot.Have brains,will have school i say.Anyway,although i still got play one or two times after the warning but we stopped it eventually and now we are caught for something we have change.Nice job to the idiots out there.Anyway the matter is not close yet but i have the support of my parents and God.Knowing this,i shall fight the good fight ,finish the race and keep the faith.

Scribble at 09:41 p.m.

Friends never say goodbye.
Monday, February 18, 2002

It's a long time since i pdated my journal.Thought i better do it tonight.
Tuesday
Went to relatives house to visit them and receive Red packets.Collected about 200 dollars.Haiz,How my hongbaos have shrunk.Went to my cousin's house to play.It was followed by supper and then my mom's Godson,that's my cousin(bigger than me),came to my house and stayed.Supposed to wait for him untill he came back from driving his Girlfriend home and i slept!it resulted in him sleeping in the car until about 4 something in the morning.

Wednesday
Went to see Collateral damage with Joe,Daryn and the KL brothers(they are only here for one week,simon going back the next day.).Hsien Long came about 10 to 15 min into the show to our utter surprise,he hadn't inform us on coming.After that we went to play starcraft(Hsien Long excluded)Jeff,Kevin and i thrashed Joe and daryn and simon with me personally wiping Joe off the map.Played until no more transport home as it is past midnight.Decided to walk the KL brothers home.I walked with them until Marina Square before i decide to take a taxi home.

Thursday
Did not go to school even though it's halfday.In afternoon was suppose to play starcraft with KL brothers but i went to see the doc for stomachache.(had it for weeks liao).Late for meeting with daniel after that.Met up with Sharon and gang.After that,Joe and i went to play CS and Sharon and daryn and louis went to play pool.(the rest had gone home laio).I went home after that while they all went to see From Hell.
Friday
Went to school.Socialise with friends and complete my Accounts assignment until it's about 5 pm.Reached home at about 6pm.Washed up,ate pizzas and went to costa sands resort/chalet specially organise for Daryn as he's leaving for the States soon.It's supposed to be Only Guys but imagine my surprise when i see Jiaying.Turns out she booked the chalet but she will return home later.Played Playstation the whole night.More guys begun to appear.Joe,weichun and me then went to nearby cheers to buy food.Discussed starcraft strategy along th way and i decide on the motto"We Dominate the Skies!"Later on,returned,ate and move Tv to the room to play Resident Evil 2 in the dark.Daryn and louis slept first then me.Joe and Weichun stayed up and completed the game.The Chalet was well executed but not much time to prepare so it was not really fun but we had fellowship.
Saturday
Woke up and booked out of chalet at around 10am i should think.It's visitation for Yf also.Suresh and i went straight to Joe's house.At around 12:30pm,our cg met up and we brought them to Joe's house.Joe brought up his collection of sea shells.They were beautiful.There was even a heart shaped shell that i wished i had it so i can give it to that Someone.Joe had a one in thirty million shell as well making him a rich man as the shell is worth millions.There's only two in the world.One,i think is in Phuket Meuseum and another is in Pasir Ris with Joe.hahjaha.that makes the shell special is because it has it's opening on the left side which is ultra rare.CG went to my house later,my parents were not in just like what i told them.Played murderer and ate ice cream.i changed into a smarter shirt which friends commented i looked like a loanshark(my father would give the reason that because he is a loanshark that's why i looked like one.).Went to Jame tong's hosue and did about the same thing.Me and aaron koh won murderer because no one even suspected us because i claimed i was the Angel and i set up James tong(the real angel) and they believed and so killed james.We killed Chinteck next and i convinced them joe was the murderer so they killed joe and then Aaron and i won!hahaha.Went to Reunion dinner at Marina South.After dinner,accidentally hurt sharon's leg using a popper.I am becoming a marksmen .LOL.Played arcade and then Bowling.I realise why i was not in Bowling School team and saw how i deproved drastically.Haiz.On the way home,Daryn and jianming wanted to stay at my house and caused a lot of person to want to do so as it's daryn second last day in Singapore.At first got Weichun,daryn,Jianming,James Pang and Louis and Ian i think.this was cut short to Daryn Jianming and Weichun.Reached my house and we went for supper.Did not eat as i was feeling not so good in my stomach.Then Weichun realise he never bring medicine so he took Taxi home leaving ,jianming and daryn only.We drank some alcohol at the expense of Jianming.Daryn was the First one to get a bit drunk.Talked a while and then we slept.
Sunday
Woke up at about 9am.Went to shit.Was inside for about half an hour.Dressed up and we went for service....late.I sat near the front row and i boldly slept,followed by the whole row which has onlu jan,daryn,jianming and me.After that we went o play Starcraft.Daryn got thrashed in all the games.We got a card and wrote down the vents in starcraft ending in his defeat.Asked him to come back next year for revenge.haha.This was to be my last look at him.haiz....
Today.
Woke up to a fatigue.Went to school and took the accounts and Physics common test,both didn't go very well.Also can't concentrate as i sat there and thought of daryn leaving at 9:45am today.Temporarily forgot about him as lessons continued but thought about him again.Wonder if Daryn will become bad a not.The feeling is like someone died like that.Haiz.Talked with Daniel in the afternoon.Saw on Simon's journal that he asked me to tell daryn that he's sorry for not being able to attend his farewell party and see him off.Well,i'm sorry simon ,looks like you have to do it yourself next year when he comes back.

Scribble at 09:22 p.m.

Another fucked up moment in life
Tuesday, February 12, 2002

A Happy New Year to you all.And while this is a happy occasion ,people and things still make my blood boil.Anyway,my favourite cousin promised to buy me Medal Of Honour:Allied Assault for me.Yeah!Currently haing a chat session with simon.Yeah,he's my pal from Malaysia.
The Fucked up moment again
Later on in our chat,Simon said he saw my IC on Sunday.He said Joe has it.Naturally anxious i was,i found out more and called Joe.My tone,i admit,was quite hostile.Well,that's me when i found out something important has fallen into the hands of somebody and that somebody did not call me to tell me.Found out from Joe that Weichun,Joe and my Ic were all left in a Lan Shop.(How could i have not known.)So he and weichun went to take it and took mine also.thanks there.And what puzzles me was that Joe did not even call me.Sure joe u may argue it's not your responsibility but how am i suppose to know when no one called me to tell me where is my ic?ANd until simon told me,i thought my IC was still safely in my wallet.Anyway,after explaining to me what happened,he said why my tone like he owe me money like that.I mumbled something about anxious for the IC and wondered how come my Ic was with him.HE SAID I WAS CRAPPING HIM!Of all people why issit you,Joseph who still can't trust people?Leave it aside,He asked me how am i getting along with Jan(Thanks for your Concern).So i said it's not only Jan but alot of People.He said how about me??meaning why don't i blame myself?I mean Fuck it man!If you bear a grudge against me Joe tell me there's no need to beat around the bush and trying to antagonise me.Suddenly everything that happen involving me it must be my fault,Did you ever ask me what happen before telling me this?You may be hurt by what i write here joe but seriously.....YOU THINK I CARE AFTER YOU BEING SO "CONSIDERATE" FOR ME?YOu may share what i said about you here with your close friends but seriously,After the CAMP you have been telling me that it's my fault also whenever something happens.I guess this is call finding fault.And what's this about not being too proud during the game?Didn't You yourself said sarcastic things to me and Daryn on Saturday after Starcraft?Joe Preach what You do lah.And don't think you are never at fault.And stop looking at things from your own perspective that you are not wrong and everything that happens to you must be deliberate.If you truly want to Reconcile then proof it not by finding my faults.It's time to find out yours too!!All that i write now cannot even calm my frustration and anger at you although they may cool down.And if you want to clarify this matter with me,I hope you do it by calling me and me alone who is involved in this!AND DON'T GO AROUND SHOWING MY IC BEHIND MY BACK!

Scribble at 02:15 a.m.

Fucked up people.
Sunday, February 10, 2002

Past Few days:
Just going to school and buying new year clothes.Passed Maths for the first time in two years.
Today
Today is a fucked up day.Woke up to a headache and later a stomachache.So i didn't go for service.Kevin came back.He called me and yeah i was touched that he still remembers this pal of his.hahahah.But things got nasty later.
The Fucked up moment
Joe called me later.He asked why i didn't come.So i told him i was sick.Then i asked him where the gang is going.He said something like:"You are sick what."So i told him i am abit alright liao.Expected,Joe did not sound convinced.Then i asked him to call daryn to the phone.Benedict picks up the phone and try to act cute trying to convince me he is daryn.He thinks that's funny?NO,no,no.(ben if that's not you,tell me)I hate people who act cute in front of me when i am urgent.Fucked up people.So i hung up the phone.They didn't call back.Some people just don't get it.So i called Daniel asking where they had gone.Daniel say the youths went to Grandlink.What the fuck is wrong with daryn?I specifically told him to call me but he didn't.What's this?Some sort of ban on me playing just because i did not come for service?If they think they can make me come service like that,forget it you idiots.I rather join a cult .Called jan,told me they were playing Starcraft,i said how come never invite me he go and tell me because i never come service.Suppressed my anger.He definitely forgot who was the one that stuck by him to wait for his friend to play starcraft when daniel they all Pang seh us.Somethings just ain't worth it.And who was the one who went to play Cs with you when u broke up?Jan pls lah do unto others what u would do.Stop following the others.And the youth leaders,Wake up your bloody idea can anot?This is no time to act boss and impose ban on ppl who never come Yf or service.Go out with those persons.Times have changed,Keep up or you will lose out?You all want church to grow but the things u are doing is not!DGLs and CGLs dun because you think you are the youth's mentor and leader means they must be there whenever u want them to.I AM NOT YOUR FUCKING DOG'!If i don't go YF or service,Call me and find out.You are busy i am busy also.Can call at least to ask me how i am feeling anot?u all only care about attendance,Is attendance more important than the individual?The moment some one reads this.They close the browser and they forget all about it.Or soemone will call me and say i think this is not right.LET ME TELL YOU I THINK THIS IS RIGHT SO FROM NOW ON I WILL NOT BE DISCREET WITH NAMES I WILL SAY THEIR FULLNAMES!aND WHAT IS THE NONSENSE ABOUT NOT EVERYTHING WILL GO YOUR WAY?You think i dunnoe this theory Daniel?A listening ear i asked for,a dead ear i get.Isn't this true?When i do something wrong why issit you Jianming who points to me to tolerate and make allowances and not to those fuckers who pissed me off?And if i am to be fired by the church because of this,let me tell you,YOu think i care!?Fuck off people who reads my journal and tell me i am wrong.I want people who takes time to understand me not someone who thinks hey this brother is in trouble or hey this bro is wrong i should counsel him.

Scribble at 03:30 p.m.

I was built for greater things....Books don't scare me!
Thursday, January 31, 2002

Artist Matchbox Twenty
Album Mad Season
Song If Youre Gone

I think I've already lost you
I think you're already gone
I think I'm finally scared now
You think I'm weak - but I think you're wrong
I think you're already leaving
Feels like your hand is on the door
I thought this place was an empire
But now I'm relaxed - I can't be sure

I think you're so mean - I think we should try
I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - I think too much
I know this is wrong it's a problem I'm dealing

If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
Cuz there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you

I bet you're hard to get over
I bet the room just won't shine
I bet my hands I can stay here
I bet you need - more than you mind

I think you're so mean - I think we should try
I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - that I know too much
I can't relate and that's a problem I'm feeling

If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
Cuz there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you

I think you're so mean - I think we should try I think I could need - this in my life I think I'm just scared - do I talk too much I know this is wrong it's a problem I'm dealing
If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
Cuz there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you

Wednesday
YEsterday at school,A ball rammed into my head during PE and caused me to be dizzy for the first half of the day.Thank God i am Alive!Went home and then after that went to Sports Club.Played basketball for an hour or so.Made great improvements as i was a bit on form.After that started training For NaFaa test by running for one round...Gradual training as named by the expert none other than me the genius.Thought about my late Maternal Grandmother after running.The first hint of her at hospital was during sports club when my aunt called me to look for my mother.Didn't know what's wrong at that time.Thought about how i will react if my last Grnadmother also die.Sad.Maybe will even backslide.haiz.Life is full of unexpected stuff.

Today
I actually did half my homework after school!So my Cell commandos are actually doing something!(Refer to my archived entry at http://kaiser.pitas.com/kaiser2/).
Played abit of Basketball after that at school.Was utterly lousy as i was quite tired.The opponents were my school team friends also.Went home later.Finally got my sleep for about two hours.Made my way to my beloved computer about 9pm.The song above i like it alot.A song For SOMEONE.hahahaha.Along the way to my mother's place,i was thinking that my Maternal Grandma can't see me score in O'levels liao.So i decide to give my best this year and make my last Grandma happy.For Grandma!!!!!

Scribble at 09:54 p.m.

It's so Unreal!
Tuesday, January 29, 2002

Yesterday before leaving for my Grandma's house,i asked Sharon for her CG mission statement and this she gave.When i asked her for the Rationale/reason behind the statements ...this was what she said to me:"jus put in the mission statement. i will pass a proper write up to yilong."What the hell man!I'm the one in charge of writing up and this is what i get.Kaoz!Did i even annoy you in the first place that you cannot even tell me properly the reason why you cannot tell me at that time?Anyway,i didn't flare up on the spot lah.I just explain to her why i must know and she relented a bit i think.Anyway,Sharon if you are reading this and feel i am doing you an injustice,by all means tell me but i will not make any changes to the journal because all these entries in short are my own personal memories and feelings.So There!
Of course interesting things always happen in school. Lots of laughs and jokes.Lesson seems to go at a fast rate.At wanted to sleep but this damned fine computer of mine is doing a great job preventing me from the sleep i badly need and i still have homework!!!!!Jialat.Right now my close pals in church are all at Work testing Xbox and enjoying life literally.How happy they are playing the Xbox even before Singaporeans can lay a hand on them.Thought of a lot of things today while alone.I forgot all of them but i remember them as logical thinkings.Mostly it's about church and its running.Was thinking to greater foster inter ministry communications by having meetings for the different YF members of each ministry to sort things out and voice out thier views.Because i always felt sometimes the Yf sometimes made some cock ups.It would be something like the UN.I definitely will follow up on this.Meanwhile it's sleep and work for me again.

Scribble at 09:36 p.m.