the dark cow of mystery
The Semi~Formal(w/o Date!)
So I went to the school dance on saturday. It was alright, in a lame kind of way. The Dj was marginally better than the "footloose" guy, who always took time to teach "footloose". This guy played music more or less non stop. Unfortuanately it wasn't music that we wanted. They wouldn't play 'i wanna be sedated' by the ramones, because you can't dance to it. understandable. They wouldn't play zoot suit riot, he didn't have time for it. I asked like first thing, as soon as i got into the dance. I also asked for "you and me and the bottle make three", but no luck there either. I asked for Cretin Hop. "No one can dance to it". He said that he listened to the rampones but said you can't dance to cretin hop. what's the song about? I'm pretty sure it's not about drinking bongwater. What about blue monday, or any New Order?. no. Fucking Asswipe. He did play blink twice, but both songs were from take off your pants and jacket(a cd i'm none too fond of) and he wouldn't play damnit(Damnit!!). Also, he played destiny's child three or four times. I hate destinies child. I could handle one or two, but not three or four. Also he play rapped and hiphop about all the rest of the time. i can't dance to ass shaking music. I have no fucking(or otherwise) ass! Discriminating against those of us with d. g. s. definitily doesn't earn any points with me.
There were some other things that did strike me at this dance as well:
Back in the Day
THe first being that when i went into the bathroom to splash some water on my face and to reanimate the glue in my hair(i tried for mega spikes, but my hair is too long now, so i slicked the sticky mess) because it had been shattered and was flaking off in clouds. Anyhow, As i went into the bathroom, this white chunker with wanna be brown tendencies steps out of a stall. I got the sink and saw him in the mirror. He's right behind me, groping himself like an over active Eminem. Initially i debated whether or not to scream rape, but then i saw the expression on his face. It was one of absolute horror/confusion. He went back into the stall and i heard a anguished sound wafting in from his stall. I believe he had lost his penis.
freshman losing things in bathrooms stalls. back in my day all that kids lost in bathrooms was, umm, nevermind. how the times have changed.
Morbidity
I was looking around the dance for people to harass, and i saw them, a couple. He slow danced happily, head to chest, ear to her breast. Dancing like a smiling jackass, he was. His date stood tall, stiff like a board, her expression barely betraying her boredom/depression/irritation. It was like a dog gleely humping a lampost. There contrast was like fire and ice, Death in a warm embrace.
Sunday, October 7, 2001
