_______________Saturday, December 20, 2003
Ne~ Is there any way to make a background on a site to be aligned right? XD I'm trying to make my own layout, without the help of free pre-made ones. (because that's what I do, I basically take their HTML and edit it. Baka. XD;;)

Um, I'm sorry for the text limit on the comment thing... It is bothersome. ~_~ So I'm writing here instead in the comment box. ^^;;

Okay, than I'm getting Broken and The Fragile, and if I like it, those other two albums as well~ Thanks. XD
And you made MUCH sense with this.
2. *phew* I hate when they make Subaru suddenly realise that he likes Kamui's gentleness more than Seishirou's violence. So he kills Seishirou and screws (oh excuse me, he makes sweet love to) Kamui. Um, no. ¬_¬
4. If CLAMP decides to kill Subaru and draw a picture of him meeting Hokuto and Seishirou again, I'll cry. XD
5. Hey, those are MY reasons for Seishirou being the perfect man. XD (now only to find him...) That also means it should work for Subaru. Subaru must have been fascinated by Seishirou, and how different he is from himself.
If they really are black and white... That's just another reason why they can't touch. They both can't change, get together and become "grey", something in between.
And on his mask... There could be a chance that Seishirou's other side came out during the year, a side that he didn't allow to show itself before (and after). In Crime, Seishirou is all alone in his apartment, having a thoughtful expression and wondering if Subaru is all right. There was no need for that... Of course, he could have been just eager to play a little with his prey, but the way he said it...
"And now, Subaru knows Seishirou held some emotion for him" ....Better late than never, I guess. XD

1. But... But... No... It's better if Seishirou is there to watch him... CLAMP probably knows that most of the readers have a soft spot for Subaru, so they won't let him die, pleasing the fangirls, and getting more money. And yes, actually I was referring to you with the evil fangirl comment. XD
2. *cries* You're mean~ Subaru doesn't deserve to go through even more pain. What did he do wrong? ;_;

I hope I said everything I wanted to. God, my head hurts. Need painkillers. x_x

04:06 p.m._____

_______________Friday, December 19, 2003
Oh, fuck. I wrote a huge entry. Seriously huge, over a page. And the computer freezes while I'm SAVING it so that I don't lose it...! >_<## Of course, I don't feel like typing the damned monster all from the beginning. So here it is in short. I'm absolutely furious. Ghrrrr.

• winter vacation starts NOW!
• school ended, passed this semester with a 4
• planning to buy NIN albums, but don't know which ones. Since I only heard one NIN song before. Thanks to Shi's lovely layout (btw: pretty, pretty! Wonderful use of brushes and Subaru~ XD) I'll buy The Fragile. Should I get Broken as well? *looks at Shi XD*
• Ju-chan,
  1. Why make Subaru suffer more when there is noone left to enjoy his pain? (except the evil fangirls) No fun.
  2. ... "because he looks pretty than" is not a reason enough.
• Shi...
  1. I'd read the series too, since I'm so lame and can't get enough of Subaru XD
  2. Perfect theory on SxK. I was afraid you are one of those insane SxKers that make the two go horribly OOC... ¬_¬
  3. Seishirou and Subaru living together... I don't know. A part of their relationship's charm is how they can never be together, in any way.
  4. How will Subaru come to understand Seishirou better when he dies? I'm hoping he will now that he's the Sakurazukamori. But for that he has to live. And kill to feed the Tree.
  5. I really don't understand how Subaru can love Seishirou so much when he doesn't even know him. But that's fascinating. XD

10:31 p.m._____

_______________Thursday, December 18, 2003
What are the odds for me borrowing the two volumes of Dostoyevsky's "Crime and punishment" in the library, coming home, starting to read Yami no Matsuei and noticing that the book Hisoka is reading during the entire cruise on Queen Camelia is in fact Dostoyevsky's "Crime and punishment" volume 1? o_o;;
But now I know I WILL read it for sure. If Hisoka can, I can too. XD

@Shi. We should talk for real once. XD
Once I read an essay or something about how SeishirouxSubaru fangirls are scary because they want Subaru to die. How that's horrible etc etc... But really, he should die. He has nothing left to live for. I don't like the idea of Subaru falling in love with Kamui, so I say he doesn't... As he said once, the only person that could make him truly happy is Seishirou. It's better for him to die, obviously, than live such an empty life. I don't think anyone would want that. ¬_¬
Oh GOD, please don't let CLAMP drag him off into another series... As much as I love seeing him and squealing fangirlishly about how pretty he is... It'd be a pain for Subaru. Unless it's some kind of an happy happy alternate universe like Tsubasa: RC. But than again... Subaru living happily with Seishirou? That scares me.

04:35 p.m._____

_______________Tuesday, December 16, 2003
The school trip to Graz paid out so fucking WELL. I jumped at the first bookstore that I saw, and even if I didn't believe they'd have ANY manga except Dragon Ball and Akira... They had a whole lot. *_* I picked up 6 X (the ones that I could remember they were good; X8, X9, X10, X11, X14, X17) and one Yami no Matsuei (volume 3; go Muraki!)... Before my classmates dragged me - literary dragged me - outside because so much excitement was not good for my weak heart. Eh. x_x And only later I remembered that I wanted X18 to see Sakurazukamori-Subaru and kawaii KamuixYuzuriha-ness, the Yami no Matsuei that has the Devil's Thrill, and some Angel Sanctuary...;_; Ah well, at least now I know where that bookstore is. And Graz is only 2-3 hours away from my city. *grin*
Oh and, and! I managed to pay for the Tokyo Babylon artbook by Bidpay yesterday. It says it'll come in 7-10 days. I hope. Excitement! XD

Poor darling Subaru. I love him terribly. T_T I suppose that he either cried and cried... Or he didn't, convincing himself that he shouldn't cry for his sister's murderer. *shrug* But seeing how he stares out the window or just into thin air... He looks like he's sick and tired of everything. That he cried so much, and finally realised just crying doesn't solve anything. But actually, I didn't read the entire manga (only the translations and such things online) so I can't really judge anything. *sweatdrop* Tonight I will read a lot. ^_^ ... And oh, I don't mind if you link me.

09:35 p.m._____

_______________Sunday, December 14, 2003
Than, Fortunecity it is. Thanks for pointing that out to me. *blows kisses*
And you're right; DOH-Fuuma could be just sad, and the only situation I see Seishirou maybe crying is if Hokuto's spell was a lie and Subaru died in his arms, smiling angelically... *sob* ... Anyway... Their ukes cry enough for them. XD (or at least, Kamui does. Subaru should cry more... It's only healthy!)

Watched something about kids on the TV. They said that scientists discovered that growing up with father's love helps the child - when it grows up - with self-confidence, socialisation and depression. (*doubts that this sentence made sense*) No wonder I'm like this! XD That's good, 'cause now I have an excuse. XP "Sorry, I can't make friends easily because daddy died when I was 9 years old." ... Does 9+ even count as growing up? I think so.

10:28 p.m._____

_______________Saturday, December 13, 2003
Well, what do you know. Boomspeed says you have to give them your credit card number if you want them to continue hosting your files for free. HAH. Right. After searching for a while, I found Angelfire looks promising.

Feeling exhausted today. Even though I slept for 12 hours. Twelve hours. And my head hurts from reading too much fanfiction. From too much angst, also. ... Not that I'm complaining.
Random thing that irks me to no end: Fuuma falling in love with Seishirou and crying for him. >_<#

08:05 p.m._____

_______________Friday, December 12, 2003
Oh my GOD. I had an awfully disturbing dream tonight. I feel sick. XD ..... Alucard and Integra were married and had two kids, of which one was Victoria Celes. *dies* But than... I visited their house or something. And it was war... and they were poor... So they all bathed in the same bathtub or something. I had to bathe with them or I'd get killed. o_o;; I remember how dream-me was wondering how huge Celes' breasts were. XDD And afterwards... Alucard and I... --- Oh god, that's just disgusting. Uhh. ¬_¬;;

On other things... does anyone know how to pay by something called bidpay? XD;; I REALLY shouldn't have went on that cursed eBay. *thuds head on table*

09:39a.m._____

_______________Tuesday, December 9, 2003
So. I finally get the shipping costs for the artbook. All in all, it's .99. I happily go to pay for it, and guess what? I notice that PayPal doesn't take money from people in Croatia. >_<## I hate my life. I never thought that they would accept only certain countries. What on earth should I do now? T_T *weep*

Mother dear is really two-faced. *sigh* She is acting all nice around me now. She hugged me and gave me a flower when I came back from school. Uh. *thinks* Yeah, kinda like Dr. Jekyll and Hyde.

And Shi? Hugs, cuddles, squeezes and the like are always greatly appreciated. XD Thank you.

09:54 p.m._____

_______________Monday, December 8, 2003
I hate her. She always promises things, but keeps the promise rarely. And even than, it comes true months later than it was supposed to. I wanted to go to the Botanical garden when I was 10 years old. I've been asking her for years, and every time, something was wrong. No, it's autumn. No, it's raining. No, I have work to do. No, we have to go somewhere else. Not now, we'll go next week. Of course, I've never been in the Garden till this day. Sure, we'll go to a family psychiatrist so he can figure out what's wrong with our relationship. She told me that months ago. But she doesn't have any fucking time for anything. She WILL yell and bitch how I don't care about my bad Accountancy grades. Will she explain Accountancy to me? She is a goddamned ACCOUNTANT for crying out loud! But no, she doesn't have time.

She can find something bad in every thing I do or say. Today I come home all happy because I got a good grade without even opening the book. "Why didn't you study during the weekend? You had better things to do? Why? That's so stupid of you! Don't you care about school any more?" Blah, blah, blah.
"What are you doing so late at the computer?"
"Talking to a friend."
"Oh, all right than. And where is she from?"
"......Poland."
"Gee, what a great country that is."
"*speechless*"

Just now she slammed down the telephone on me. She said that my brother should sleep in my apartment, and if I don't like it than I should go sleep outside in the bushes. What the fuck, woman?? Did I say anything against it? NO! Why are you so pissed off all the time??

God, I want my father back. I loved him more.

09:16 p.m._____

_______________Monday, December 8, 2003
Grr. Why doesn't the seller send me the shipping costs already, so I can pay for the goddamned artbook... >_<#
Speaking of which, I hate spam. I really hate it. It's awful when you're expecting something, see one new message in your inbox... and it turns out to be something like "We Provide The Greatest Mortgage Rates!" ¬_¬

I want another layout. But I can't decide which. *sweatdrop* There are a couple of possibilities... The yaoi one? The Christmas-y one? The New Year-y one? XD

*nikoniko* I read the translations (and Leareth's scanlations), and love TB so much that I wanted to buy the original manga online. Than I found out that it'll be released in America. Hm. What to do, what to do XD;;

Off to school. *runs*

09:15 a.m._____

_______________Saturday, December 6, 2003
Just finished watching 10 episodes of Gravitation. *dies* Recieved my 4 CDs with various anime I told my uncle to download for meee. I'll list it just... because.
Gravitation episodes 7-13
Gravitation OVA
Gravitation AMV (Tainted)
CLAMP in Wonderland short music video (*_*)
Hellsing episode 13 (because I missed it when it was on TV.. XD)
Neon Genesis Evangelion - Heart, Air
Rumiko Takahashi theatre episodes 1+2 (I don't actually know what it is, but it doesn't work; sound only. *cries* Maybe it's just my brother's ancient computer... Maybe it'll work on mine... ;_;)
Rurouni Kenshin manga volumes 12-16

Next I'm planning downloading hack.//sign, or whatever it's called. XD Yes, I don't know anything about it other than there exists a girl called Subaru. And that it has something to do with computers and "another world". XD;;

Won the Tokyo Babylon artbook. *cheer* The seller must still send me an e-mail with the shipping cost...

Me neither. o_o;; Went to look up for some info just now... From what I understood from some Italian website, it was translated in 2001, it's reversed, some coloured pictures are missing, and the translation sucks at times. Huh. ....Before this I had no idea that there is so MUCH manga in Italy. Seriously, they have a bunch of stuff. @_@ Also, looks like I can understand Italian better than I can speak... Ah well, at least something. XD And snow. Snow! *shudders* Hopefully that doesn't mean that it'll snow here soon. Please, no. ~_~ I hate winter. Except on pictures. Than it's pretty. XD

*stares at the pile of text* Shuuichi's hyperactive behaviour seems to have rubbed off on me. NOOOOOOO~! XD Eh, we agree on one thing. Yuki is örE!%ba69;$!sexy. And angsts. And dresses like Sakurazukamori Subaru in the last episodes. Yuuukiiiiiii~! XD~~~

10:03 p.m._____

_______________Friday, December 5, 2003
!!!!!!!!
WHY didn't I know that Tokyo Babylon was translated in Italy?? O_O I accidentaly found out. And Italy... Italy is VERY close to Croatia. Just a couple of hours by car. ^______^ I MUST pay them a visit. ...But I will only understand every 20th word or so (*sucks at Italian*)... XD Or should I wait 5 months for the American edition to come? But than they'll be translating it for months, years. *thinks* And I don't know how the hell I should find where the comic-shops that have TB in Italy even are. *sweatdrop* ..... *depressed* So near, yet so far. ¬_¬

05:22 p.m._____

_______________Thursday, December 4, 2003
"Du bist der den ich... der einzige den ich je..." ...geliebt hab! That's GOT to be it! XD
*sob* So he's really dead now. Poor honey. T_T And his German last words were "You're the one that I... the only one that I ever..." ...loved? Of course. ^^ ...But the episode was so fast. >_< Bam! Setsuka, bam! the eye, bam! Hokuto, bam! Seishirou, bam! ANGST. The end. Bah. The anime isn't that good. At least the manga is all sloooooooooooooooow, but the anime is slooooow, than fast!, than sloooow again... It's annoying.

On the German manga edition. Fun seeing X translated to different languages. XD
Subaru: ...die Worte...die ich immer...erwartet hatte... höre ich nicht von dir.
"The words that I always expected, I do not hear from you." as opposed to "You never tell me what I expect to hear." Huh, so what does that mean? The second one is about how Seishirou always surprised Subaru, all the way from the "...do you think I'm sexy?" time. But the German one should mean that Subaru expected Seishirou to tell "something" to him. What? That he doesn't feel anything for him? But he told him that years ago already. So, Subaru wanted to hear it again? Huh. Stupid masochistic boy. I must admit I do not understand you sometimes. >_>;;

Wow. My mom actually remembered Subaru's name. Because I keep making references on him for months now. XD ("Subaru lived in his own apartment too when he was 16!") She came to me while I was watching and was going to ask me to do something, but heard Fuuma saying "Subaru" and:
Mother: Oh, all right, I won't bother you now. *looks at Iruka* ...god, you are going to cry?!
Iruka: *nodnod* ;_;
Mother: ..... *goes away, probably thinking "what did I do wrong when raising her?"*

Pointless post dedicated to Seishirou. May you rest in peace, Sakurazukamori. XP Now, to return to studying the mind-numbing Cultural-historical heritage... Arr.

06:50 p.m._____

_______________Thursday, December 4, 2003
A whole lot of randomness, just because I feel like it.

+ Got my own super-safe-for-online-shopping American Express "Blue" credit card. Saw "The Blair Witch Project", it's okay. My stomach didn't hurt today, finally. Will see XTV16 in 30 minutes.....
- Got a big fat F in Accountancy. It wouldn't be so bad if: a) my mother did not work as an accountant, and b) if we didn't have only 2 classes of it left.
I'm pretty much screwed tomorrow. Cultural-historical heritage test (have to write the damn homework), History big exam, German test (have to write the damn homework).

I have this thing for birthdays. It's awfully weird. *huge sweatdrop*
Happy 39th birthday, Muraki. ^^ You rule. Although I only read 4 volumes of Yami no Matsuei. Hm.
Happy 2nd birthday, Asuka. XD Oh, yesterday I finally downloaded End of Evangelion, so I'll watch it soon~ ^___^ ...Although I already forgot half of the happenings in NGE... Saw it 4 years ago when I was a just a little kid... ¬_¬;;

*lmao* You mean that was you in the picture before the edit? If Seishirou is actually bored with something that his precious Subaru-kun is doing... Subaru must really suck at i-- ....! Unintentional pun, I swear.

---

A sadist, a masochist, a serial killer, a necrophile and a pyromaniac sit in a park, bored.
Sadist: Let's find a cat and torture it.
Serial killer: Let's find a cat, torture it, and kill it.
Necrophile: Let's find a cat, torture it, kill it, and fuck it.
Pyromaniac: Let's find a cat, torture it, kill it, fuck it, and burn it.
They all look at the masochist expectantly.
Masochist: Meow.

04:44 p.m._____

_______________Wednesday, December 3, 2003
Tomorrow is XTV16... I've waited for it for months and now it's finally time for it. But somehow a part of me doesn't want to see it. I don't know why. ^^;; I can stand Seishirou's death in the manga, why wouldn't I in the anime. ....*sob* He's looking so alive in the anime... Now he'll die, and he was in just a couple of episodes... T_T

Did Japan in Geography class today... I had no idea that the teachers were aware that I like it. o_o;;
Teacher: Today we're learning about Japan.
Iruka: *beaming*
Teacher: And Japan is... *looks at Iruka*
Iruka: ...awesome. XD
Teacher: Knew you'd say that.
She also showed us a book with facts and a couple of pictures-
Iruka: OMFG IT'S RAINBOW BRIDGE! *faints*
School can be a little fun sometimes.

"I'm a fan. I'm a sports fan. I'm a music fan. And I'm a Star Trek fan. All of them. But here's what I don't do. --- Let's list our ten favorite episodes. Let's list our least favorite episodes. Let's list our favorite galaxies. Let's make a chart to see how often our favorite galaxies appear in our favorite episodes. What Romulan would you most like to see coupled with a Cardassian and why? Let's spend a weekend talking about Romulans falling in love with Cardassians and then let's do it again. --- That's not being a fan. That's having a fetish." --Josh Lyman (The West Wing)
I never watch West Wing. Right after surfing the net looking at CLAMP stuff, I turn on the TV on a random channel and see this guy saying this. Ohhh, is it a SIGN from GOD himself?? XD

05:38 p.m._____

_______________Tuesday, December 2, 2003
Oh GOD. *thuds head on table* I just bid on the Tokyo Babylon artbook on ebay. But I was so nervous and excited (first time doing that) that I forgot the price (25$) and bid 30$... >_<## Fuck. 5$ isn't that terribly much, but still... Argh, I hate my constant general confusedness SO MUCH. >_< Now I just pray and beg that everything will turn out fine. >_>;; *worryworryworry*

Hmm? Do I think you're sexy? Yes. Correction, I meant HELL YES, I DO. XD

04:28 p.m._____

_______________Monday, December 1, 2003
Hmm. I keep changing my layout details. ^^;; Uploaded the css and the bg on Boomspeed, because Freewebs liked screwing things up.

After 6 days of crap happening constantly, today seems to be a good day. o_o I think my bad luck finally left me! *happy* T_T

*is envious at everyone else's pretty pretty layouts*
Yours is just gorgeus. I never thought that a picture of a person could look this good in black and white only. And it does. Look. Very good. *nuzzlelick* My owner. XP ....... *cough* *quits being overly obsessive in public* ...Yes, that's exactly why I dislike (coughhatecough) little kids. They are hyperactive and don't listen to anything you try to tell them. >_<

Even though I don't really know who hide is, I like your layout too much not to, uh, mention it. XD;; It's light and cute and I really, really like it. ^.^

04:53 p.m._____

_______________Monday, December 1, 2003
*sparklesparklesparklesparklesparklesparklesparklesparklesparkle*
I finally moved into my own apartment. *_* Quite happy with it, as you can see. XP And now I'm awake this long - even though school's tomorrow - just because I can. *is acting extremely childish today, as you can see*

Where are you? XD;; I hoped you'd be online, than I'd IM you at midnight to congratulate you for surviving in this insane world for so long. XP Huh, damn. Anyway. Happy birthday, m'dear.

00:17 a.m._____

_______________Saturday, November 29, 2003
Something new about the mysterious layout image: "And just before anyone asks, main image comes from the maze formed by the reverse of the cardass masters collection of X, coming with the DVDs. Don't ask me if they come with the Japanese or English version because I do not know." Says so here. Mm.

My monitor is fixed. *cheer* But the colours now seem a tad different than before. ~_~ Anyway... Out of four things I was supposed to do today, I did one. Bah. >_<

EDIT: Made the text a little bigger. It was too small.
And Ryo, (*doesn't know what link to use* XD) I got a 2 from that math test. ^^;; (mind you, it's not like in Germany. Here the grades are 1=worst, 5=best. >_>)

06:15 p.m._____

_______________Thursday, November 27, 2003
Today SUCKS. I wish I could (have) skip(ped) it. T_T

Lan-kun's monitor is broken...! @_@ I came back from school and saw it's completely in magenta(?) tones. Some colours are still visible, kinda, but green isn't showing at all. It hurts to look at the screen. My poor baby. My poor eyes. x_x

Yesterday I sent an e-mail to the seller of the TB Artbook, asking if I could buy it from Europe using American Express. But they never replied, and now the auction is already over. >_> GAH. Amazon.com sells it, but they don't have it in stock any more. x_x There is one used on sale, and it's 90$! Yeah right. ¬_¬

Ah! I found it terribly amusing, actually. ^_^ And I can't wait to see the new layout~ ^.^

04:16 p.m._____

_______________Wednesday, November 26, 2003
I want to place a bid on Ebay for the Tokyo Babylon Artbook... But I don't know if I should, I'm so nervous. x_x

04:21 p.m._____

_______________Wednesday, November 26, 2003
Uhm. Really, I've been acting so strange for the last couple of days. -_- I've been having HORRIBLE mood swings. Was feeling sick today and got out of school earlier. Actually it wasn't that bad, but I just wasn't feeling like being there. Mmh. Read your comment on DA last night and started to cry. I don't know why. o_o;;; Eh, this all is probably because that time of the month will be soon. Funny hormones and stuff. ~_~

Blah. Math test tomorrow and I have no idea. Grrrh~ >_<

02:59 p.m._____

_______________Tuesday, November 25, 2003
@I9?hG#)4Uj=/)&!>_< *hyperventilates*
I hate myself for not doing my homeworks on time. I hate myself before not doing it, while not doing it, and after not doing it. And I can't find my Croatian notebook nor my Italian book. Fuckfuckfuck. Either I'm going insane or someone has a fetish for my school-things and keeps stealing them. >_< !!

09:12 p.m._____

_______________Tuesday, November 25, 2003
My older dog had problems with her ear and had to go on a operation. ;_; She'll be okay, thank god. *sniff*

After 130 pages of "Le pere Goriot" I decided that I like it. XP Turns out that Vautrin is gay which makes for a lot of amusing situations involving him and Eugene... XD
After he adjusted the student's head on the chair so that he could sleep comfortably, Vautrin kissed his forehead while humming: "Sleep, sleep, my love, I will stay up for you!"
He also calls Eugene "my angel", "you big child" and "my little boy". Very cute. XP Even though he doesn't feel anything for little Eugene; he's just trying to get in his pants. XD Who wouldn't; E-kun is young, cute, has black hair and blue eyes. But Vautrin looks like Kusanagi. Uh. XD

Very glad I made your day. ^.^

I wonder that too... Seems like CLAMP is sorry for killing off Sei-chan, so they're doing a lot of pictures of him. XP

05:17 p.m._____

_______________Sunday, November 23, 2003
EDIT: Original image. ^^ Hopefully it works, since it acted strange when I was uploading it... :/

*_* I adore Kiss wa Shonen o Rouhi Suru. *has it on constant loop* I have to find a translation...

Oh, today are the selections for the new president! I really wonder who will win. It is no my concern, but it's kinda interesting anyway. XP

Thank you. ^^ I'm quite fond of it myself~ XP And I have a HUGE scan of the picture. Right now I don't have access to it, but I'll give it to you soon.

Ewwww. XD I knew about Ves' eye, but I had no idea he can take it out! ^^;;

03:37 p.m._____

_______________Saturday, November 22, 2003
*blink* I feel like my brain isn't functioning... *shakes head*

23:22 p.m._____

_______________Saturday, November 22, 2003
New layout~ Sei-chan's birthday is today! ^.^ Happy birthday you sexy, sexy man. If you want to celebrate you know where to find me. XP
It would have been better if I made the layout earlier, but I only thought of it when I rediscovered this image of him yesterday. The eye he's holding should be golden. Seems that CLAMP likes to change eye colours...
Gah, I didn't do that birthday present for him that I thought I would. I knew I should have started on it a month ago when I dreamt it. XP

12:15 p.m._____