Friday, January 16, 2004
New layout coming tomorrow. And it kicks major ass. I finally caved and decided to use iframes. hehe.
^_^
| Lau @ 11:57 p.m.
Friday, January 16, 2004
Just spent the last few hours working on this. From scratch. My first character doll. Not to bad, if I do say so myself.
| Lau @ 10:20 p.m.
Thursday, January 15, 2004
3ds max 6
*whines*
Anybody wanna buy it for me? *wink*
| Lau @ 01:40 p.m.
Tuesday, January 13, 2004
I DEMAND that all of you Blogspotters get comments RIGHT NOW! Go here and sign up.
If anybody has a pitas page that they're putting them on, let me know, because you need special instructions for them, which I have, because I'm just that damn good.
| Lau @ 10:19 p.m.
Tuesday, January 13, 2004
One of these days, people will learn not to piss me off. I mean, yeah. I have a pretty nasty temper. But, I don't take it out on others often, not physically anyways. I take it out either on myself, or I mess with their heads for awhile. Or both. But it works different with different people. If someone I already don't like pisses me off, there's usually no making it better, unless you really impress me, which takes alot. If you're an aquaintence, I give you a chance to explain. If you're a friend, you get a better chance. If you're someone I love and trust with all my heart, I give you endless chances to come apologize, I give you your space, and I'm still there for you when you need me. I understand that it's hard to talk to someone, when you know you've hurt them in some way.
Now, I've been stabbed in the back a few times. And the past few days, I've been running those times through my head. I had never given any of them my full trust. No, not even Woody. But this time, I trusted someone with my life. That rarely happens. It was my last stab at trusting someone. And I got slapped in the face. It's not even the situation, what happened, that bothers me anymore. Now, it's the fact that my trust was broken. When she knows what happens to me when my trust is broken. She knows what I do, and she knows how I handle being hurt. And she did it anyways.
At first, she didn't know that I knew. So she was hiding it from me. I don't think she even planned on confronting me about it. But now she knows that I know. And still, she hasn't apologized. When she found out that I know, she was told I wasn't really pissed. And I wasn't, but I am now. I'm starting to get passed pissed now.
I know it's not the easiest thing to do, but when you're this fuckin close with someone, you don't just let them stew. You don't leave them alone, and pretend it never happened, so that they just keep getting more pissed..and more pissed. You don't, fuckin, do that.
It shouldn't have happened in the first place, but okay. It did. I can move on from that. But I can't move on from the fact that she doesn't have enough fuckin respect to come up to me and apologize. To say that she's sorry for ripping out my heart and stabbing me in the back.
I barely know who I can trust anymore. Especially now.
I don't want to have to get ahold of her, and start this whole damn thing. Because, yeah, I love her to death. I love her more than words can explain, but still, I'm not gonna be nice about it. No fuckin way. I'm giving her two days. Two days to get ahold of me. If she doesn't, I'm gonna say something. And by then, I'm gonna be even more pissed.
You shouldn't hurt one of your closest friends like that anyways. You shouldn't try to steal away the one thing that gives them happiness. And you shouldn't take advantage of the fact that they have a big heart. You should gather up the balls to confront them, whether you have them or not.
You do not hurt me and get away with it.
| Lau @ 01:05 p.m.
Monday, January 12, 2004
An art, a beauty of understanding,
A hate, a shame of no comprehending.
The volcano erupts,
Destroying my world in ecstasy,
Cuts that destroy my life,
And seperate me from what is real,
A solution, that can both destroy and heal.
The blade and me are one,
A sense of relief to watch my blood run.
Cleanse my heart and soul with blood,
Try to wash away the tear stains and mud.
The world keeps mocking me,
Why cant I be like blood, wild and free.
My wings are clipped, I can no longer fly,
I have no tears left to cry.
God did make me like you,
This 'art' is what I have been cursed to do.
I hate the mirror and its complextion,
In case I see more than my reflection.
Blood spilt for security,
And the endless search for purity
Not by me.
Hiding in the corner,
With his wings tucked in,
Tears in his eyes,
And cuts in his skin,
He once was innocent,
At some point in time,
Because of his scars,
He's no longer divine,
His wings are withered,
His arms rest on his knees,
His tears run down,
As fast as his wrist bleeds,
Do you see him,
Hiding over there,
Are you going to act,
Like you don't care,
In torment and tears,
He does dwell,
We cannot help,
This Tainted Angel...
Also not by me.
| Lau @ 11:11 p.m.
Monday, January 12, 2004
It's only 8:30, it's still early. Still early. She probably had a busy day. That's why she didn't contact me. She's okay. It's still early. Still 8:30. She made it through the night, I know she did. It's only 8:30. It's still early. I have the night ahead of me. She's okay. Everything's okay.
| Lau @ 08:34 p.m.
Monday, January 12, 2004
I'm such quiz whore. Wee..
'Sadistic Bastard' PLEASE VOTE!!!
What Type of Lunatic are You? (With Cool Pics!!)
brought to you by Quizilla
You, my friend are a true individual. You most
likely hate trends and are creative. By seeing
things differently, people either admire you or
think you are a bit strange. I'm guessing you
are a lot like me. Perhaps a Good Charlotte
hater? I hope so. An inspiration to us all,
continue being you! (If you like GC, I'm sorry,
I am just expressing an opinion)
A Deeper Look Inside Yourself (with pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
<<>>???What Kind Of Angel R You???<<>>( Anime Pics )
brought to you by Quizilla
Rain: You are the sound of rain. You have two
important sides. There is your strong, powerful
side and your calm, gentle side. Both are very
important. Rain also reflects a bit of darkness
in your personality. It isn't bad, just shows
that along with the good, you also can see bad,
which can come in handy. (please rate my quiz)
What Sound Are You?(now w/ pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
You're Exotic Dancer Barbie. You have some moves,
and will do anything for a few bucks. Take it
off girl, but keep it PG-13 please.
If You Were A Barbie, Which Messed Up Version Would You Be?
brought to you by Quizilla
You are naturally born with a gift, whether it be
poetry, writing or song. You love beauty and
creativity, and usually are highly intelligent.
Others view you as mysterious and dreamy, yet
also bold since you hold firm in your beliefs.
What Type of Soul Do You Have ?
brought to you by Quizilla
Your Heart is Grey
What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla
You'd bite their neck and drain their blood! Why?
Because you're a vampire like me! Whats that?
You're not a vampire? Well here's your chance.
How would you Murder?
brought to you by Quizilla
Your soul is bound to the Rose Petals: The
Wronged.
"'ve come undone and all hopes of mending
me are gone because the pain took my soul.
Can't you see? The only one who can put me
back together again is me."
The Rose Petals are associated with sorrow,
reflection, and wisdom. They are governed by
the goddess Persephone and their sign is The
Teardrop, or Broken Love.
As a Rose Petal, you are always self-reflective and
may be hard on yourself. You probably have
been hurt in the past by other people and can
sometimes distance yourself, as a result. You
don't usually let other get too close to you,
but you are very good at mending your spirits
back together by yourself.
What Rose Is Your Soul Bound To?
brought to you by Quizilla
YOU EAT PEOPLE!!!
what's YOUR deepest secret?
brought to you by Quizilla
| Lau @ 10:18 a.m.
Sunday, January 11, 2004
I pray to god those weren't the last words she'll ever say to me.
You know, it's funny how someone feels in a situation like that. You don't know how to act. And I mean, you really don't know how to act. You don't know now to respond. Do you cry? No. Do you panic? No. Do you laugh? No. Do you get mad? No. There is no actual way to react to it.
So what do I do? I go out, get another glass of soda, sit back down and work on my thesis. What else can I do? I mean, if my life's about to fall apart, I might as well get my work done.
But that's not it. I'm just trying to find something to concentrate on. Because if I don't, I'm gonna fall. I'm gonna fall hard. And I'm not up for that right now.
| Lau @ 11:41 p.m.
Friday, January 9, 2004
=( Oo )=
åc(_u)__.-
U U
*hiccup*
Drunken kitty. hehe.
| Lau @ 09:06 p.m.
Wednesday, January 7, 2004
Reasons Why
My heart can't trust
My eyes can't lie
My voice can't sing
My soul can't cry
My friends are gone
My enemies too
My head is wrong
My truth untrue
My heart can't touch
My fingers can't feel
My mind can't think
I can't eat a meal
My angel has fallen
And with it my hope
My heart it frozen
My head can't cope
My voice can't speak
My fingers can't touch
My spirit can't soar
It's all to much
I can't be strong
I can't even try
It's not your fault
I love you and goodbye.
- LMB / 1:14pm / January 7, 2004
Try to cheer me up, and I'll rip out your heart with a grapefruit spoon.
| Lau @ 01:05 p.m.
Tuesday, January 6, 2004
Che cosa la rende così meravigliosa? Che cosa la incita a meritare tutto l'vostro amore? Che cosa ha all'interno di lei, quella che non? Che cosa fa la sua media di presenza o di voce così tanto più di mine? Come mai tutto dice i mezzi il mondo a voi e tutto che dica sia merda? Non è giusta. Sono stato là per voi, io sempre sarò qui per voi. Ma non significa nulla. Poiché sono niente. Mai. Sono andato. Buon-fuckin-arrivederci.
| Lau @ 09:26 p.m.
Monday, January 5, 2004
I need to take a vacation from the boards, for reasons that I unfortunatley can't explain. I wish I could, but I can't. But I'm not going to tell them directly, because I don't want to upset them. God knows they've got enough on their mind right now. So I'm just gonna slip away quietly for a little while. *sigh* I was hoping I wouldn't have to. I thought I'd be able to handle it, but I just can't.
You'd think I'd be able to just put it behind me, but I can't. It's eating at me like crazy. And it shouldn't even be a big deal! Well, I guess it's a big deal. I was stabbed in the back by someone that.. I can't get into this. I've gotta go.
| Lau @ 01:48 p.m.
Monday, January 5, 2004
Is my top picture broken for anyone else? x_x;; If so, does anyone know some decent image hosting services? I'm having horrible luck with them.
| Lau @ 01:35 p.m.
Sunday, January 4, 2004
No, really. Seriously. I'm 3 HOURS BEHIND SCHEDULE! *dies*
I need a life.
| Lau @ 03:48 p.m.
Sunday, January 4, 2004
"I'm so glad you eat, Laura" - Mom, in an abnormally snotty sarcastic tone.
She's so loving..and supporting. *grumbles* But fuck her, I'm not eating 'till dinner now. Bitch.
| Lau @ 02:08 p.m.
Sunday, January 4, 2004
Ha. Did you hear that Britney Spears got married in Vegas? Oh, it was beautiful. She had the hotel bellman walk her down the aisle, and her apparel consisted of a stunning pair of blue jeans, and a baseball cap.
-_- Celebrities these days.
Anyways, it's 5:30am, so I think I'll go to bed. I didn't do anything on my To-Do list yesterday, so I've gotten get it all done today *cough* Riiight.
3 weeks (ish) 'till I graduate! Weeeeeeeeeee!
| Lau @ 05:38 a.m.
Thursday, January 1, 2004
I just love how I have NO FUCKIN FREE WILL! Ugh.
You see, I was going to write a nice long entry, but I'm being dragged out of the house. AGAIN.
So I'll write later, that is..if I'm allowed some time to myself.
| Lau @ 06:38 p.m.
Thursday, January 1, 2004
Metroid: Zero Mission
To be released on 2/9/2004.
WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME OF THIS?! ?! ?!
-_- There's ALSO a Chobits game for GBA that nobody told me about.
T_T
Oh, Happy New Year by the way.
| Lau @ 03:20 a.m.
Sunday, December 28, 2003
La La says:
lol go pee on a duck it will help
La La says:
-random- i want to pee on a duck now
*snort* Oh goodness.
La La says:
oh im just soooooo wonderful....if only i had some liquid crack right now id be better
God I love this girl, lol.
| Lau @ 03:23 a.m.
Saturday, December 27, 2003
http://www.badgerbadgerbadger.com
o_O;;
| Lau @ 12:03 a.m.
Saturday, December 20, 2003
I have Christmas Ants eating away at my brain and it's ALL LOWELL'S FAULT!
-_-
| Lau @ 12:29 a.m.
Wednesday, December 17, 2003
| Lau @ 09:58 p.m.
Wednesday, December 17, 2003
If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go have A COMPLETE FUCKING MENTAL BREAKDOWN!
EEEERRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
| Lau @ 06:05 p.m.
Tuesday, December 16, 2003
Laura's To-Do List
- Make Chrissy, Annie, Lacy and Brooklyn's Avatars/Signatures
- Start new set of 10 inspiration-based avatars
- Start new set of 10 'Dark/Evil/Gothic'-based avatars
- Start new set of 15 Music avatars
- Start new set of 10 Anime avatars
- Start new set of 10 'Misc' avatars
- Finish application
- Sort through scholarship stuffage
- Create main index image, and decide between Tables or Frames for DM.
- Put together main page for DM.
- Write up side-pages for DM.
- Study for all that English crap that I haven't looked at yet (even though I got it 2 weeks ago).
- Finish reading Ishmael
- Take English Crap and Ishmael quizzes
- Start Ishmael paper
- Get absence slips
- Finish senior thesis
- Create NP background
- Create grey faerie NP lookup
- Install new ink cartridge
- Touch up and Print Resume
- Organize English binder
- Read to page 62 in 'The Things They Carried'.
- GO TO SLEEP!
All within 2 days! 3, at most. Wooo...
I am so ...off the walls. You see, I was a little down last night (as if you couldn't tell, by my recent poem), so I couldn't sleep. I just stayed up all night. I'm sick of having nightmares everytime I close my eyes, anyways. So yeah, to get myself through the day, I've had a can and a half of soda, my orgasmic orange juice (major energy booster), 20 fortune cookies, 8 candy canes, 4 butterfinger bell thingies, 2 peppermint patties, and a cup and a half of coffee. As well as a huge golden delicious apple. I am OFF THE WALLS!
I'm kinda worried though, at the same time. I lost alot of weight. Like I said, BMI...16.9 %. That's bad, considering underweight is 18.5, and Anorexic is 17.5. Yep, I'm a little under. x_x;; But I can't eat. I'm always full. I've been eating like, half a meal a day, because I can't eat anymore. I feel sick. I was full today after a few sips of pepsi. But I downed the entire thing, and forced myself to eat half of my apple. Meh. I couldn't eat anymore though, until I found fortune cookies. Bought 20 of 'em. Forced myself to eat them 'cause they're that damn good. They're still not gone though, and it's 3 hours later. x_x;; *shrug*
Speaking of, I've decided to collect fortune cookie fortunes. So, if you happen to have any lying around...yeah. o_o;; I'm gonna be buying like..20 of 'em a day. So I'm gonna be swimming in fortune cookie fortunes. They're only 5 CENTS! That makes me happy.
I feel cute today. Just thought I'd share that.
*sigh* I'm worried about Chrissy. I mean...really worried. I'm so afraid she's gonna try and kill herself again. I don't want her to succeed this time. I don't want her to succeed ever. *sigh* I LOVE YOU CHRISSY BABE! *xoxo*
Meh, it's 2:12pm. So I 'spose I should go get ready to go. I get to go see my hunnie until 4:30. I'm excited, haven't seen him since Friday. Yay ^_^ Ja!
| Lau @ 02:00 p.m.
Tuesday, December 16, 2003
| Lau @ 01:53 a.m.
Monday, December 15, 2003
Have you ever been lost
Inside your own head?
Have you ever wondered
If you're alive or dead?
Have you ever been numb
Both inside and out?
And tried to give up
Without a thought or doubt?
Have you ever been convinced
That nothing is new?
That it's all just the same
You'll always be blue?
Have you ever found comfort
In your own self harm?
And worn scars on your body
Like a good luck charm?
Have you ever wondered
What would happen if you were gone?
Who would grieve over you
And wonder what they'd done wrong?
Have you ever sat down
To write a poem or a letter?
Hoping someone would find it
And make you feel better?
For those who have been there
You know how it is I feel
And you know that sometimes
It's too impossible to deal
Now there's nothing left
To say or think or do.
Just know in your heart
That my love is true.
With that I drift away
With not a tear left to cry.
It's not your fault, I promise
I love you and Goodbye.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME. I'm fine. I swear.
| Lau @ 10:37 p.m.
Sunday, December 14, 2003
We got a Xmas Tree today. Yay ^_^ And amazingly, it didn't take a 50 of them for mom to choose. Only 6 or so. That's a record!
But to make the night even better, I got to have my White Chocolate Mocha Espresso. Completely orgasmic.
OH! And, in Barnes&Noble, I found 4 anime magazines. One was a magazine on DVD - 10 bucks. I would've gotten it, but dad said no x_x;; The other one had a DVD included, but it didn't say for what. That was 10 bucks too. The third one was Shonen Jump, which is pretty good, but ...eh. The last one, was Animerica! I haven't seen Animerica in so long. ^____^
*licks it* IT'S MINE! o_o;;
I tried a new salad, too. Garlic-Crusted Shrimp Caesar Salad. It was abnormally good, but I barely ate any of it. After have 4 mozzeralla sticks, I was abnormally full. v_v Which is pretty bad, considering all that I had all day was a few fruit snacks. Yeah, my stomach has shrunk alot. But what can I say? I've been sick for a few weeks. Yeah, that's my excuse. Take it or leave it. Unfortunatley I've dropped below 110lbs, too. With clothes on, I'm 110'ish. Heavy clothes. Without, I'm probably between 106 and 108. I'll weigh myself again in the morning.
Meh, I suppose I should go to bed. I have a long day tomorrow. I'm finally getting my graphics site, Digital Moonlight up (hopefully). It's a little Anime Side Network to Laura Inc. which I've decided to put off until I get my degree. DM should be a nice little businness to lead up to it, though. It's gonna be free, and include pre-made layouts, avatars, web sets and backgrounds. I still haven't decided on whether I'm going to hire staff or not. I'm too picky with my graphics. Maybe I'll recruite a few of my friends and teach 'em how to make graphics, then force them to work for me. *shrug* Who knows.
Alright, I'm freezing, and I have a need to go read my Animerica magazine, so I'm gonna go to bed. Oyasumi nasai, minna!
EDIT: Orgasmic (my personal site) is gonna be up within the next 2 weeks or so, too. I've caved and decided to put some of my fonts up there, since they're in so high demand. ^_^ Clique'ified won't be up until February, and my Network page will be up somewhere around January. Oh, and I'm splitting up my blog, once my Network goes up, because I don't want my visitors reading my personal stuff. So, this will be my main blog, with my daily stuff, and my other blog will be full of all the shitty stuff that nobody wants to hear anyways. ^_^;;
| Lau @ 04:22 a.m.
Thursday, December 11, 2003
Wow, I'm in a really good mood. Like, really good mood. Firstly, I don't feel abnormally ugly like I normally do. I've been getting comments all day. Everybody says that I look sexy o_o It really makes me happy. I like that alot more than getting the "oh my god, you're ugly" looks or comments all the time. Also, I've been having a horrible time with my solo, because neither of the band teachers would help me, but today, I totally nailed it. For the first time, and tonite's the concert, so I feel pretty good about that. Also, I was really stressed about Comp 2, because I haven't been able to get any of the projects in because of being sick and such, but we just got that worked out. I just have to do a set of 12 web greetings (it'll take me an hour, at most), to make up for everything. Oh goodness this is wonderful.
I'm still nervous about tonite though *cringe* But it'll be alright, I hope. As long as I don 't completely freeze x_x;; But I never have before, don't know why I'd start now. I got my own stand too! For the entire year, I was forced to share with everyone else.
Ah, I'm happy. woo..
Alright, I gotta go make it look like I'm doing something constructive. Ja! xoxo
| Lau @ 01:19 p.m.
Wednesday, December 10, 2003
I just got off the phone with my favorite girl ^_^ That makes me happy.
| Lau @ 06:41 p.m.
Wednesday, December 10, 2003
This is the first time in awhile that I can really say, without any shame...I'm so fuckin scared.
This is such an odd feeling. I'm usually very independant. But right now, I just want to cower to someone. I want someone to hold me, and tell me it'll be okay. And I want them to be right.
But I don't want to be lied to either.
I'm so fuckin scared.
| Lau @ 01:26 p.m.
Tuesday, December 9, 2003
Lau's To-Do List:
1. Make 2 blog layouts
2. Make Lacy, Brookly and Chrissy's siggies.
3. Make Chrissy's avatar, and an entire new set of avatars for the boards.
4. Re-do my college application
5. Finish my scholarship essays and send them in.
6. Watch "Instinct" for English.
7. Catch up on the HW from the 5 days I missed.
8. Start going through my C++ book
9. Hunt down Mr. Healy and go through a bunch of shit with him
10. Have a meeting with Perky.
11. Re-do my room
12. Work on getting my license
13. Get ahold of the nearest GLSEN representative, so I can attend a meeting. (Somebody wanna come with me? You know you want to.)
14. Go Xmas shopping.
15. Re-do my exercising chart.
16. Get a job.
17. Get a life.
Grah. All of these have to be done within the next week. v_v Which is entirely impossible. You know why? Because dad rented F-Zero GX for me again. I orgasm just thinking of playing it.
I feel so fake right now. But hey, it's better than breaking down! Woo..I think I'm gonna go overdose on coffee. *shifty eyes*
| Lau @ 09:11 p.m.
Tuesday, December 9, 2003
Wow, I just realized how much I don't trust people. I seriously can't type how I feel right now in here, because I'm so afraid someone's gonna go run and tell someone and get me in a whole bunch of shit. It's not alot of people though, just a couple. And if you think you're one of them, you're probably wrong. And don't ask who, because I'm not going to tell you. If you're a true friend to me, I know it, and so do you. So don't worry.
That made sense in my mind. Maybe no-one else's, but it did in mine and that's all that matters.
So, to those few people who have fucked my trust all up, Go to hell. I hate you for what you've done. You really made me believe I could trust you, when everyone else turned their back. I gave you my heart, and you shattered it into a million pieces. And no, I'm not talking about a boy-girl heartbreak situtation. Friends can break your heart too, usually much more than any significant other could. I gave you so much. And now, I can't even put all my heart into what's mine. You've ruined it entirely for me, and I hate you for it. Because of you, I feel like a burden to everyone who truly cares for me. I can't go to anyone, or lean on anyone's shoulder. I have to do everything alone now, because of you.
And you know, that's entirely true. I feel horrible writing in this blog, because I feel like a burden to everyone. I feel like such a depressive little bitch. I don't want to bring everyone else down with me, so I've been trying to keep it to myself. Which, is why I'm falling apart as bad as I am right now.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I feel the need to go do something stupid. And no, I'm not gonna kill myself, so don't even start.
| Lau @ 08:36 p.m.
Saturday, December 6, 2003
A little update.
My computer is semi fixed. x_x But I have no messengers at the moment, so you won't see me online for the next couple days.
Also, anyone who has images by me that are hosted at piczonline.com, they may not show up within the next few days. That includes my blog images, so in the next few days, my blog may not work. I'm too lazy to switch to my server right now. So...pfft.
| Lau @ 07:11 a.m.
Thursday, December 4, 2003
Heeey..guess who's not going to D&D tomorrow? Yeah, that'd be me. Because I'm in solitary frickin' confinement.
Of course, I can go to school. I'm well enough to get up early, go 6 hours without my meds, running around, and being abnormally stressed all day. But, I'm not well enough to sit on my ass and role dice for a few hours.
And to make it better, my computer's shot. We have to re-install Wind-hoes. I'm so tempted to take all the Windows startup CD's, and BURN them. But then dad would just deprive me of a computer. ERGH.
Oh, and even better...I HAVE PMS. And, all my anime is on here. Meaning, I can't watch it. Which is just fuckin cruel.
*throws bricks*
EDIT: Since when do I have to use the xmp tag to do my little angry face? Maybe it's Netscape. Yeah, I have to use Netscape. Because of the freakin' Browser Parasite that we were also having problems with. I can't WAIT until I have my OWN computer. Well, I do, pretty much, but I want one that I actually have control over. Dad just doesn't listen. DAMN YOU! -_-; I'm going to bed. *stomps off*
| Lau @ 11:36 p.m.
Wednesday, December 3, 2003
This..is so much shit. I've been sick since September. I'll get something, get over it, and then get something else..then something else..ergh! I don't think there's been a frickin day that I haven't been sick. *grumbles*
But it's my own fault. I'm the one that started this 'not-eating' shit 7 years ago (even if I didn't realize until like..2 years ago x_x). Now my immune system is shot, and I'll probably have all these horrible fuckin diseases when I get older, and die really really young.
It's just like Teddy said, "That's the consequences". Even though he was the same person that said "It's an illness, it's okay. We're here to help you." Help me my ass. God I hated that place (4 Winds). Especially now, since I'm going to the doctor's (a new doctor, actually) and she knows I'm "Anorexic" (god I hate that word), and if I'm below 110, or whatever, I don't know if she'll try and get me sent back. Errrrrrr...I never should have told anyone. I never should have gone to that stupid hospital.
Oh I'm in a delightful mood today.
Anyways, you prolly won't hear from me for the next few days. I'm dreadfully sick. But atleast I can get out of bed without passing out today. For the most part. I am really dizzy, though.
Heh. Story of my life.
| Lau @ 08:27 a.m.
Monday, December 1, 2003
Secrets - (518) 785-0660
If anyone can find the website for Secrets (dance club) in Latham, PLEASE leave me the address!
| Lau @ 02:13 p.m.
Sunday, November 30, 2003
This is my own personal crap, which is why I didn't put comments.
Ideal Weight (what's considered "perfect" for my height and build): 121 lbs
Current Weight: 110 lbs
Lowest Weight: 88 lbs (Late 2002-Early 2003)
Highest Weight: 122 lbs (Coming back from Hospital)
Anorexia Weight (what weight would get me put in a hospital): 103 lbs
Anorexia Weight (to be released from a hospital): ~110 lbs
BMI Chart: >18.5 (Underweight) / 18.5-24.9 (Normal) / 25-29.9 (Overweight) / 30+ (Obesity)
Current BMI: 17.8
Current BMR: 2439
Today: 1 Grilled cheese sandwich, 1 bowl of Cambell's soup, ~1 cup cold cooked Turkey with gravy, 1 cup homeade french fries. .o0(*grumbles*)
Exercise: 100 situps, 30 push-ups, 300 leg-lifts.
Calories burned: ~500
| Lau @ 11:31 p.m.
Saturday, November 29, 2003
""Better yet, forgo the cooking sherry altogether this year. Waking up the next morning in Reno with a 300-pound transvestite stripper wearing a policeman's hat is not worth the trouble."
o_o;;;;
| Lau @ 11:26 p.m.
Saturday, November 29, 2003
Archived, and with a new layout. It's only temporary though. Until I get my Xmas layout up. *^_^* Yay.
So whaddya think?
| Lau @ 11:19 p.m.