When in doubt, emo out! Everybody is doing the black hair dye, black rimmed glasses, dark eyeshadow thing... everybody is so fucking emo these days! Really, is it anything to be proud of? I mean, some people are just so emo it's so sickeningly cute, and then I think to myself, I wish I looked like that, except for the fact of spraying a billion hair products through my locks, getting piercings when I am afraid of needles, and having a whole closet consist of clothing of the bands you like... Yeah, so maybe I am a wimp. Does that make me more emo than you?
This emo fad was bound to come sooner or later... punk is dying out, emo is the fashion now. Emo is not music, it's a stereotype, cause really, all good music is in fact emotional. I am so mad at emo right now... listen to me, I sound like a typical emo kid... so horrendous, not all too shocking at the same time.
I wished people could judge you for how cool you are, and not by the items of flair you wear on your sleeve or mini Dickies messenger bags. For your intellectual capacity and good humor, rather than just being awesome for liking the same bands and such. It feels so good to listen to hardcore music sometimes and really appreciate it... it's what I was weaned on, weaned away, and now weaned back upon... like it's come full circle, because all this OMG THURSDAY and OMG SIMPLE PLAN is driving me crazy. Don't get me wrong. I love Thursday. But sometimes, nothing really can beat a good Botch track...
maggie* said something irrelevant at 11:31 p.m.
::e-mail::::aim::::gbookie::
::you know, i cannot believe this...:: Sunday, March 30, 2003
A little over two months ago, I went to a show and came back with a big bruise on my shin, skin peeled and all. Now, I look at my shin and realize the bruise is still there... I wonder if it's ever gonna go away. I mean, 5 years from now, am I gonna look at my shin and say, "Ahh, I remember that show... it really sucked cause some wannabe riot starters formed a mosh pit, and ruthlessly kicked me in the shin... good times??" ...I really hope not. Some injuries are good reminders... but most of the time, they are quite bad. The pain is gone, but the poison lingers...
maggie* said something irrelevant at 10:26 p.m.
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::like scrambled eggs:: Saturday, March 29, 2003
Another day, another entry.... if I had to describe today, then I guess it would be... well, contemplative. I've just been thinking a lot of things over and over, and now I feel like I am pretty clear-headed, which is good; it puts me in a good mood. Anyway, today was the most beautiful day that I've seen for a while (weather-wise).... wait, I lied. Thursday evening's pollution made the sky a brilliant rosy color too... well, anyway today I went to Ocean Beach in SF, and the scenery there was just absolutely breathtaking. I mean, the sky was a twinkling periwinkle, the surfers and sailboats were out, and it was just one of those things that would make one so lucky to be a Californian, as cliche and corny as that sounds.... I mean, man creates his own misery. He works in a cubicle 5 days a week, but on Saturday, he can come out to play with the kids, the dogs, the family, to get away from life and get back to nature and the ocean's calling... maybe I have been reading too much Chopin and/or transcendentalism stuff..... >.<
I don't know why I am going on and on about how it was such a pretty day... but it was, and it's days like today where I can walk for a mile and a half along the shore, just pondering, wondering, thinking about what has happened in the then and what will happen in the now. It was one of those key moments where you really wish you had someone to walk down the shore with.... I mean, anybody, it's just much much nicer to talk to someone walking the fine line between land and water, freedom and corruption. So I may not have been holding anyone's hand, but I was holding my shoes and I found a good number of broken sand dollars. No beached whale this time.... just the scent of an acid/base product... and of happy wet dog. You know that smell. It happens all the time.
It feels so weird for me to actually know that I honestly don't like anyone (as far as couple/relationships go). For a while, I almost did... it's like there was this catalyst that happened a couple of months ago, and then it lay dormant, and then it struck me again just a couple of weeks ago... craving with desire, wanting with passion... and just as quickly as it came, it's just as quickly gone. I don't feel the need to talk to him, think of him, but maybe just reminisce of fond memories every two days or so... but hey, that's an improvement from every five minutes... I am just reminded of this time I could barely enter the doors, for fear of seeing a person who I could not bear to see, and my heart was racing so fast as I clutched my cold Frappachino tightly with my clumsy little hands, and wondered how things would work out, breathing a great heavy sigh of relief when he was courteous enough to open the door... I will never forget that burning sensation, or how wonderful, yet terribly anxious it made me feel... and although I don't really get that feeling these days, I feel like I am on the verge of it everyday... just wanting to do something so crazy, so radical, that people would look at me and call me insane (not that they don't already...) Yeah. These are the things I think about when I am by myself on an ocean shore for an hour or two.
maggie* said something irrelevant at 11:54 p.m.
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::*grudge grudge*:: Tuesday, March 25, 2003
For Christ's sake, I have been up since 4 AM and I have to go to school in about an hour.... *sigh* ....I need coffee. Pronto. I also have to print like, 20 pages of work that I have been doing since yesterday, 9 PM-ish.
School is a waste of paper and ink.
maggie* said something irrelevant at 06:25 a.m.
::e-mail::::aim::::gbookie::
::overcast but brilliant just the same:: Sunday, March 23, 2003
Nothing is better than a sober morning accompanied by heavy sighs.... until the mass load of homework kicks in. Damn.
"everything... is going our way... it's going our way..."
maggie* said something irrelevant at 10:05 a.m.
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::pleasureable:: Sunday, March 23, 2003
I am totally satisfied. Nothing beats going to an amazing show and getting props from amazing people whom you indefinitely admire. It's nice to know that sometimes your presence is appreciated. Out of town shows are always the best... even though they always feel foreign and strange at first, they get to feel just like home, once you get used to it. I am in love when things work in my favor, even if I don't care if they do or not. I suppose I am just fortunate, and I do not take that for granted for even one second. I enjoyed my evening immensely... how about you?
maggie* said something irrelevant at 01:12 a.m.
::e-mail::::aim::::gbookie::
::yeah i'll be cool and start a riot like you.:: Wednesday, March 19, 2003
Finally, after like, my 3 months of waiting, I finally got the new Cave In CD... yay. All is good and well in the world now, even if Bush does have to be a fucking moron... *grunt grunt* Okay, so maybe not everything is perfect, but what more can we aspire for? We are going to war even though the majority of the nation does not want it. I think Bush must be blind or deaf or something... and yet, even someone who really did have those handicaps would probably still do a better job governing our nation than him. Well I'm not gonna spew about this since one can probably judge my stance now, now that I have made up my mind about where I stand. Before I didn't really care.... but now I suppose I can't be neutral anymore, and it's do or die. So yeah. I'm not gonna bicker, and I'll be silent, but at least I know where my feelings lie.
In other news, comrade Laura and I are planning a wedding... now that should keep me entertained...
maggie* said something irrelevant at 04:24 p.m.
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::embrasse le ciel:: Tuesday, March 18, 2003
All I've had to eat for today was a simple bagel. No cream cheese. Not on both sides. Not even on one.
And yet, I am full from appreciation and the feeling that my opinion matters. For once. =)
maggie* said something irrelevant at 07:57 p.m.
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::oh how i enjoy just kickin' it like a wild donkey...:: Monday, March 17, 2003
There is nothing better than…
***Getting shotgun in a friend’s car, even though the other passengers really don’t care
***Putting up your hooded sweatshirt and violently head banging to ghetto ass music like Maroon 5
***Listening to N*SYNC on a NOW! CD, realizing that you still know all the words and that Justin Timberlake is actually pretty hot…
***Singing along to Jimmy Eat World’s “Bleed American” at the top of your lungs, even if it was played more than three times in one car ride…
***Tailing a friend’s car into a drive-thru, only to get rudely flipped off…
***Trying to get to In and Out Burger and driving almost a mile away from it… before your friends call you up and bitch at you, wondering where the hell you are until you tell them that you went past the bridge… which is not what you’re supposed to do, because In and Out was totally just like, right around the corner…
***Eating a big fat juicy burger that you have been craving for days…
***Watching your friends make idiots of themselves in a public place, but hey… can’t say I’ve never done it before…
***Riding in a car while molesting/harassing/loving a friend’s younger brother
***Getting molested by two males not of relation and getting both your shoes stolen on multiple occasions in the process… as well as tambark everywhere inside your clothes…
***Going home and not letting go of someone, no matter who it is… it’s just nice to hold and be held once in a while.
***Ending up not really going home… but to chill out with another homebody and kicking some ass at DDR, which you haven’t played for a couple of weeks…
***Spying on the vehicles of strangers, picking out some odd familiarities
***Playing with an incredibly adorable dog and pushing the button on the van that makes the door automatically slide open…
***Going home and immediately taking a swig of some Martinelli’s sparkling apple cider, straight from the bottle.
***Turning up the volume on From Autumn to Ashes, just to kick back and recollect….
Yeah… I really like minimum days.
maggie* said something irrelevant at 03:02 p.m.
::e-mail::::aim::::gbookie::
::perplexion:: Sunday, March 16, 2003
I am currently in a state of confusion and bewilderment. But I think I like it this way.
maggie* said something irrelevant at 11:25 p.m.
::e-mail::::aim::::gbookie::
::check-up!:: Thursday, March 13, 2003
It's like.... it's like I have things to say, but I don't say them. It's like there are certain things on my chest that I just can't get off, so I suppose I will just recap my life in its current state to make sure everything is okay and swell. Or to find out that it is not...? Who knows...
Anyway, school and academics have been pretty decent so far. I got a C on my AP Bio test, but I still have barely and A- in the class, so go me. I don't know how long I can keep it up though, I also have a C in AP US History which is driving me crazy too. Heh, so much for improvement second semester.
Badminton has kicked off, and I can't tell whether it's a major pain in the ass or oodles and oodles of fun. I don't know. Somewhere in between. Laura and I lost our game today, but I have faith in us that we will come back and kick some major arse. I think I've been improving, but people keep losing a lot of faith in me, so I'm quite unsure... I'm really not too confident about a lot of things these days, and I miss it. I wish I was on top of things again.
At least my friends are being good to me. It's occurred to me lately that I've lost touch with a lot of cool people I know, and I can feel it beginning to perturb me. However, I have gotten to know some other acquaintances better, so I suppose that's all good too. Music is still keeping me happy, and there needs to be better movies coming out, because seriously, I am not going to spend watching two hours of a piece of crap. All in all, life is filled with the same amusement as it has always been filled with. Nothing new or groundbreaking, but just the same as always... but at least I am content.
maggie* said something irrelevant at 07:13 p.m.
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::detestables:: Monday, March 10, 2003
i hate how such a good conversation can turn into such an awkward one the next day.
i hate how the people you care about don't seem to care for you.
i hate how people pretend to be nice and compassionate.
i hate how everything's about saving your own ass.
i hate it when people think they own something that isn't theirs.
i hate having emotions that have no significant meaning.
i hate people that are nice and compassionate.
i hate physical attractions.
i love coldplay.
and boy, do i love bottled water after a broken heart.
maggie* said something irrelevant at 07:28 p.m.
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::war for welfare:: Tuesday, March 4, 2003
Never have I argued so much. But then again, never have I proved a point so well...
maggie* said something irrelevant at 11:34 p.m.
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::new month's resolution:: Saturday, March 1, 2003
...I shall try and be content as I am now. Not long ago, I got back from the best show I've been to in a while. Everything was just right, with just the right amounts of goodness in everything: friends, guys, and of course, the music was outstanding. Now I'm just pretty much spazzing out at my computer wishing that the night didn't end so early, even though I got back quite a bit later than I usually do. I think good moments make me quite hyper, and I think that especially right now, it would be good to be in the company of people, even though I just saw a lot of people not less than an hour ago. But I guess I mean seeing not in the cozy sense... but more of a mutual friendship-type bonding thing... now I really don't know what the hell I am talking about. All I know is that I want to stay up feeling like this for as long as I can... until my slumber, good evening and adieu.
maggie* said something irrelevant at 02:02 a.m.
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::a little bit about me::
People know me as Maggie, the little Asian girl. I am now 16 years of age, and sadly, still a junior in high school.
I live in California, and even though it's not quite that sunny, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
I have high ambitions and hopes, but for now, I'll just stick with the identity of the nerd I am.
::pastimes and preoccupations::
As of late, my main fascination has been the art of film and cinema.
Of course, music still also plays a huge role in my life, and I have a really bad addiction of buying
new music or going to rad shows. Writing is also a major influence. It keeps me sane.
I don't like to be bored, so if I am not online wasting time, then I am usually oot and aboot.
Sushi is my best friend.
::current intrigues:: ::watch:: À la folie... pas du tout (he loves me, he loves me not) - laetitia colombani, bringing down the house - adam shankman ::listen:: "jane doe" - converge, "monkey knife fight" - minus the bear ::read:: porno - irvine welsh
